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He idled for a moment and stared up at the splendors that was Ishgard’s beauty, his homeland which he would proudly protect over and over again. Though per usual he made it his mission to avoid Aymeric so he hurriedly went towards the chocobo keep and rented a bird, taking his leave and headed for Tailfeather in the Dravanian Forelands.
He had only just joined the Scions and all of his missions as one had been in the company of the others. But this time it was different, a personal request from R’enlan regarding a friend of hers who lived in a secluded village in the mountains of Dravania. She said his ‘expertise’ when it came to dragons was perfect for the job.
He did not understand why she couldn’t just take care of it herself, but then again something had happened to her when she returned from the First again and that damnable woman kept it to herself like usual. It was none of his business and he trusted G’raha to be by her side during it all.
He couldn’t help but to let his mind wander as he travelled. Back to the time when they first met all those years ago when Ishgard was seeking the Scion’s aid against the imminent attack from the Dravanian horde and Vishap. He had vastly underestimated her and Alphinaud at the time, he only saw a boy and a broken woman, but after the fight he shrugged off all his assumptions about them. Ishgard could have never asked for a truer ally than the Scions.
After the Bloody Banquet he saw her again enter Ishgard with Alphinaud in tow and a lalafellin woman, even more broken than before but they set to work immediately. It blew his mind how they went onwards so selflessly on behalf of his country to aid them, asking nothing but sanctuary in return which the Fortemps happily provided.
He suspected foul play right from the start when the accusation of heresy started to surround them by the Heavens’ Ward. It amused him to no end to see R’enlan and Alphinaud, a small woman who barely reached their elbows and a seemingly prepubescent boy, beat up two of the vaunted knights of the Heavens’ Ward, Ser Grinnaux and Ser Paulecrain, and proving their innocence in the process.
Estinien then joined them on their futile mission to parlay with Nidhogg and recruit Lady Iceheart to their cause, they succeeded somehow on the latter and the four of them went on a journey together that would change them all.
He was completely blind at the time to the feelings he had developed for R’enlan, cursing himself for worrying and caring about a stranger he hardly knew and she made it not easy to get to know. He watched her ever so carefully as she kept on spiralling in her self-destructive ways, back then he did not know what had happened and it bothered him to no end why he cared so much.
Everything changed when they arrived in Tailfeather. They decided to spend the night in town and he was not blind nor deaf to her constant turning and sighs in the bunk bed above his. Unable to sleep and eventually jumping down from her bunk, grabbing her daggers and heading outside. Completely unarmored and in the very same clothing she struggled to fall asleep in, unaware that he saw it all and with a sigh he stood up from his bunk, reaching for Gae Bolg and ran after her.
The insufferable miqo’te had gotten herself into a rather precarious situation, surrounded by a more dangerous breed of chocobos, the red kind who were quickly overwhelming her and her exhaustion was more than evident. The famed Warrior of Light was not going to meet her end to some pesky birds if he had anything to say on the matter. Dashing forward and taking down a couple of them before grabbing her by the arm and dragging her to a nearby abandoned camp.
What happened there was where everything went somewhat downhill. They fought until he decided to do something exceedingly stupid and reckless, so he kissed her. Unsurprisingly she punched him halfway across the camp for his move on her, completely deserving of it, but what she did next completely caught him off guard. She straddled him and kissed him, it was far from gentle and both of them clung to one another as they poured all their recent frustrations and anger into it. As one thing led to another, they spent the night together in the abandoned camp, a night full of rough, desparate sex and conflicting feelings.
He was well aware that in the beginning she was just in it for the sex, but the heart is a fickle thing. As much as he tried to fight it, he was unable to keep his true feelings for her from emerging as they continued their travels together and whatever this ‘relationship’ they had going on.
It was obvious that she started to somewhat care for him, her hostility towards him lessened considerably but she never fully opened up. It was as if her heart was somewhere else, belonging to someone else.
Haurchefant’s death hit all of them hard, especially her. He had become like a brother to her in these past few months and the Fortemps were like her family, but with everyone mourning in their own way, she was all alone. He was the first one to be there for her and it pained him to see her like this, this tragedy closed her up even more and she felt like an empty shell at this point.
He tried to keep an eye on her during their chase after Thordan, but she was becoming more and more unhinged, ruthless and without mercy for her enemies. Alphinaud had voiced his worries to him that she was becoming less and less like herself, even he hardly recognized her anymore. Estinien was tempted to ask Alphinaud what exactly had happened to her prior to the banquet but decided against it, it was not his place to say.
It all fell apart when he let his guard down for only a split second after she defeated Thordan, allowing Nidhogg to take over his body and have him witness R’enlan stare at him in utter horror and fear of what he had become.
Now it was his turn to emotionally scar her.
Over the following months, it took every onze of his strength to keep his mind sane as he battled for control with Nidhogg, far from willing to be the vessel for Isghard’s destruction. The mental battle with the great wyrm was far from an easy one and Nidhogg knew exactly how to get under his skin. Whenever he saw R’enlan Nidhogg taunted him, making vile threats which made his blood boil, making him all more determined to overcome this enough to end it.
The day came when Nidhogg made his final assault on Ishgard. He was forced to face her, unable to stop the wyrm from harming her and left her with a deep gash on her face, but she fought on valiantly until he felt Nidhogg’s control slip enough and he finally managed to take over. He begged her and Alphinaud to end him on that day, but both of them were too damn stubborn to listen and while he was thankful for what they did, he did not approve of it, the risk was far too great. But in the end he was free.
He decided it was for the best to leave Ishgard and be on his own for the time being, the shadow of Nidhogg ever haunting him, but there was one thing he had to do before he left. He sought out R’enlan, finding her recovering well from the fight and free of bandages, now with a new scar over the bridge of her nose, which he caused.
He had started to notice before this whole mess went down that she was starting to open up a lot more to him, allowing herself to care, as much as he wanted it he could not let it develop further. It was bad enough that he loved her and harmed her in such a way, he would not have her love him and suffer as he did for his actions. So he ended their relationship and she thanked him. Thanked him for at least giving him the closure she needed and hoped they could still remain friends, something he sincerely hoped he could at least do.
Had she not gotten closure in the past? Was that what happened to her just before they met? Had a previous lover died or something? He pondered on those questions at the time, what he assumed turned out to be true in the end and that explained so much about her.
Parting on good terms with her he ventured out on his own, wanting to pay respects and apologize for his ancestors for what they did to Ratatoskr, the Dragonsong War itself and Hraesvelgr gifted him with a new armor which would help him on his future journeys.
When word reached him that a new primal, a dragon named Shinryu, was born from the eyes of Nidhogg, he cursed man’s stupidity and knew where his next mission would take him. He had to end Nidhogg’s legacy once and for all so he set forth to find the dragon primal only to cross paths with R’enlan once again, though indirectly, when the Ala Mhigan resistance was about to lay siege on Castrum Abania. The least he could do was disable the main cannon of the Castrum, which he did and caused quite the stir amongst the Imperials.
He continued his journey until he got news that the General of the Imperial army himself, the heir apparent to Garlemald, Zenos yae Galvus had captured Shinryu, so he rushed to Ala Mhigo immediately. He was too late for the battle itself, carefully avoiding Aymeric yet again since he was in the area, he made his way to the Royal Menagerie where the remnants of Nidhogg’s violent legacy remained, his eyes.
After putting Nidhogg’s legacy finally to rest, he wandered yet again. Dealing with dragons in the Far East before getting an urgent missive, begging him to fight with Ishgard once again to hold off the Empire that threatened Gridania’s borders. Initially refusing but he couldn’t help but to stay close by, if anyone was going to be in the thick of the battle, it would be R’enlan Tahl.
He often thought about her, not regretting his decision to end things with her, it was for the best. But that did not stop him from worrying about her, caring about her and loving her. He wished he could make it stop, he wished he could talk to her normally without wanting to pull her into his arms. She was not his and she would never be.
The absence of the Scions in Ghimlyt Dark worried him, he had not seen a single one of them on the battlefield and it was extremely out of character for them to stay out of situations like this. When he heard the reports that the Warrior of Light was locked in combat with Zenos, he ran, ran as fast as he could because the rumour did not escape him that an Ascian wore his skin.
When he arrived on the scene he thought himself too late when he saw Zenos strike her down with his sword. There was blood everywhere when that monster went in for the kill, causing Estinien to freeze in horror for a split second before interfering, deflecting the blow, defending her until the crown prince lost interest and left the scene. Feeling the adrenaline wear off and fear settle in instead he quickly turned around and by first glance she appeared to be dead, if it hadn’t been for the small rise and fall of her chest. So he quickly but carefully picked her up, rushing her over towards the Alliance’s camp where he met with Aymeric, promising he’d get her the finest chirurgeons Isghard could offer, promising she’d survive.
Doubt started to seep into his mind, could he have stopped this from happening if he had been there? Should he have never left her? These doubts plagued him for the longest time and he heard the reasoning why she was the only Scion on the field. An unknown voice had been calling to them, pulling their souls out of their bodies and taking them somewhere else. She had also been a victim to these attacks and that is exactly what had happened on the field when Zenos nearly killed her, the voice had called to her and caused her to lose focus.
He swore one day to find the one responsible for these summonings and make them pay.
Though unsure where to begin he diverted his attention for the time being and travelled to the Far East once again with Orn Khai, a young dragon he met during his travels there. But he ended up being ganged upon by the Scion’s secretary, Tataru Taru, and another lalafellin woman he had never met before, Krile Baldesion who managed to fool him with surprising ease to help the Scions while their core members still lay unconscious.
He travelled to Garlemald investigating Black Rose, where he happened upon the former Imperial legatus, Gaius van Baelsar, who was there on the same mission as him and the two made an unlikely alliance. They parted while fleeing the Imperial Palace after witnessing the real resurrected Zenos killing his father only to be halted by some vile Imperial machinery which he quickly disposed of before heading back to Mor Dhona to report what had happened.
Where they finally met again face to face.
He had been so careful avoiding her until now and he was taken aback by her appearance. The fact her hair was much shorter now did not bother him, but the fact it was now stark white and her eyes were different in color, one lighter than the other. Without knowing the context at the time, it made him furious , who had done this to her? Did the voice that kept calling to them have something to do with this? But he reminded himself she was no longer his concern so he took his leave from both her and the Scions, refusing to prolong his services.
When the threat of Lunar Bahamut arose he knew he couldn’t ignore it and when word reached him that she and some of her fellow Scions were in Ishgard, he sought her out. Only for it to be an awkward meeting where he mistook Alphinaud’s sister for him and a strange red-headed miqo’te man who stared at him in awe and disbelief. He studied the man for a moment, he had the same tattoos as the other Scions on his neck so he looked the part of a Scion at least.
He was introduced to them by R’enlan as Alisaie Leveilleur and G’raha Tia. He noticed also the surprising ease she was around the two of them, he did not remember ever seeing her display any form of genuine joy, let alone a laugh during their travels together.
He then agreed to join them to seek out Tiamat, absolutely speechless when Alisaie and G’raha said they could try to free her from Bahamut’s tempering. Who exactly were these people? From his initial impressions of the two it was clear he underestimated them, seeing how they freed Bahamut’s mate from both her mental and physical shackles, recruiting her in their mission to bring down Lunar Bahamut.
After their success in Paglth’an he joined the Scions officially, initially unsure of working so closely with her again but decided the matters at hand were far more important than the matters of the heart.
By joining the Scions he became privy to certain informations, such as the fact that it was G’raha himself who was responsible for the Scion’s fall and nearly costing R’enlan her life. Without thinking he confronted the man in the middle of the Rising Stones, slamming him into a nearby crate demanding answers and saw definite fear and regret in his eyes. Before G’raha could answer for his actions, R’enlan grabbed Estinien in anger, dragging him away from the still shaking miqo’te.
She was furious, why? Why did it bother her so much that the man behind so much pain was being taught a lesson?
She told him everything that had happened on the First, how without G’raha the world as they know it would be gone. He had awoken in a Calamity ridden world where Black Rose had killed them all and the survivors fought like animals. And the only way to prevent this disaster from happening, he had to summon her across the rift where she was reunited with the Scions and together they prevented the Calamity.
He had concealed his identity from them all until the very end and Estinien found out that R’enlan had history with him from years ago, before they even met. His mind started to wander as she told her story, how he had locked himself away within the tower and woke up all those years later. What if he had been that someone she was romantically involved with? What if he was the reason why she was so broken for so long? And now with his return he is seeing a completely different side to R’enlan, a much more relaxed and happier version of her.
He did not approach the subject as she continued to explain what exactly happened. The world was being consumed by primordial light and with her arrival there was finally someone there who could stop it. So with each Lightwarden she fell she absorbed its light, explaining her sudden change in appearance. What G’raha, or the Crystal Exarch, had initially planned was to take the light away from her and take it beyond the rift to die, but his plans were foiled by an Ascian but together they rid the world of its over-extending light, allowing it to heal.
In short, had he not locked himself away inside the Crystal Tower, he would have not woken up in that world to prevent it from happening to them. Estinien began to understand her reasoning now and felt a slight pang of guilt for assaulting G’raha like that, he had allowed his emotions to overwhelm him and he owed the man an apology.
The shorter man jumped when Estinien approached him, afraid that he might come for him again and still clearly shaken after the sudden encounter. He apologized for his actions and explained himself, though not revealing the true reason behind his outburst. He studied the man for a moment, he was initially completely fooled by his appearance, appearing to be in his mid-twenties but in reality this man had gone through unimaginable things that would break anyone lesser. And if he is who he suspects him to be, he literally travelled time and space to save R’enlan’s life and a lot more, it would be disrespectful of him not to respect the man for what he did.
His suspicions were shortly confirmed just before their battle on the Carteneau Flats by Thancred, the two of them were romantically involved and he had intended to lock himself in the tower without telling her to spare her further pain. He suddenly felt like a massive hypocrite, when the man did the same thing he thought was right for her, but she seemed much happier around him. He did not know her back then but if this man could bring out what he only assumed was much like her younger self, he was happy for them and would not get in their way.
He felt strangely nostalgic when he fought alongside her again and Alphinaud, they were only missing Ysayle to complete their party of misfits. What he did notice different about her fighting style is that she was much slower than she usually was, and when she stumbled on the field, barely dodging a lethal blow from Lunar Ifrit but thankfully Alphinaud was quick enough and had pulled her away just in time. He apparently knew what was up with her and shot her a knowing look, he would ask about it later.
After the battle she was limping but she shrugged it off, they had just won a massive battle but the war was yet to be won. And he noticed a visible change in her after she returned back to the Rising Stones after leaving for a few months to train, in what he had no idea. But when she stood before them all wearing a new garb not fitting for a rogue of her stature, but of someone who weaved complicated spells and it turned out to be exactly what she was training in.
It turned out that an injury had caught up with her so much that she was becoming a hindrance in battle and needed a different approach. With help from a friend she learned a different side of summoning, one that benefited them and did not drain the land of aether. Learning more about the primals other than just how to beat them, that would no doubt aid them in their coming battles against the Telophoroi and the Lunar primals.
While their enemies were recuperating she focused her attention elsewhere, on Bozja, yet another country to liberate from the Imperial occupation. But something went horribly wrong which nearly took her life and he was thankful that G’raha remained by her side through the recovery period. He had begun to appreciate the man much more over these past few weeks, knowing he could count on him to keep them all safe in battle or keep them alive, and he knew she couldn’t be in more capable hands on her road to recovery.
Though per usual she threw herself into work again, but she did not share with everyone what she was up to, only thing he knew it took her to the First again. And whatever happened to her there clearly shook her enough.
And there he was, at the end of his trip down memory lane. Despite everything he was glad that they remained such good friends even after everything they had gone through together. The hardships and the good moments they shared, memories he would not trade for anything. She was an extremely important part of his life and he would be forever grateful for her and he believed he was finally ready. Finally ready to let his feelings for her go, she had her happiness in life and he knew he had yet to find his and this was his first step in that direction he believed.
Speaking of steps, he had hardly been paying attention to where he was going and just went where his feet took him, only knowing this camp he was supposed to find was somewhere in the mountains in Dravania.
Then it happened. He cursed his lack of focus when a small red dragon suddenly crashed right into him, sending him straight to the ground dangerously close to the edge. Footsteps approached and the sound of more wing flaps reached his ears when he noticed he was actually surrounded. Amongst the small herd of dragonlings, a dark scaled auri woman approached him, dressed in clothing fit for a mountain hermit he thought. She placed a protective hand on one of the dragons and stared him down, her gaze piercing and threatening. He stared up at her in shock and gulped.
“Well...shit.”