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Gwyn awoke to fingers in her hair and puffs of breath on her cheek. As her eyes opened slowly, she found a warm hazel gaze peering back. Azriel’s mouth quirked in a soft smile.
“Good morning, Sunshine.”
With a grin she stretched and rubbed the sleep from her eyes. She loved the affectionate way the pet name tumbled from the soft curve of his lips. Those warm, velvet, sensual lips that she couldn’t stop staring at all of a sudden…
“Berdaaaaraaaa.” His teasing voice was deep and rich and sent shivers down her spine. With a gasp the redhead’s eyes snapped back up to his. “Keep staring at my mouth like that and I’ll be forced to use it.” She couldn’t stop herself from licking her lips.
“And who said that was such a bad thing?” Her heart stuttered when he didn’t hesitate, grasping her chin gently and pressing his warm smile to her mouth. It was like fire and wind and lightning and ice – everything all at once, every single time. She could drown in his kisses and be content for that to be her demise. Azriel pulled back, but only to press a peck to her nose and then to her brow. The redhead sighed and wiggled herself contentedly into his chest.
“Oh no you don’t, Gwyn,” he murmured, his words warm on her hair. She pouted, not that he could see.
“What?” she answered sweetly, playing innocent and winding an arm around his middle and hooking her leg around one of his.
“Gwyneth Berdara, we have to get out of bed. I won’t be tricked by your cuddles.” To put a big, fat exclamation point on that statement she felt herself being pulled over him as he rolled them onto his other side, leaving her hanging precariously off the edge of the bed. She squeaked, tightening her grip and looking for any additional purchase she could find. “You thought you were pretty clever, hmmm? Thought you could just wrap those lovely legs around me and I’d be at your mercy. And look where that got you.” She could feel him chuckling against her.
“Azriel Aphelah, if you push me off the side of this bed I swear on all that is holy-“
He slid the both of them mere inches, but Gwyn shrieked as her rear slipped further and began to pull her body over the edge. She clutched his t-shirt, determined to bring her boyfriend and his likely smug grin down with her.
“Az!”
Gravity would not be stopped.
“You’re such a jerk!” she cried as she fell over the edge, her ass finding the wood floor with a dull thud. But Azriel tumbled over her, forced by her leg still somehow hooked around his knee and her fingernails that had stretched his shirt. Instead of squashing her, though, he rolled and pulled her into him, pressing their chests together as she ended up atop him. His rich, throaty laugh made her skin pimple, even as she swatted at his shoulder. His hazel eyes shimmered with bliss, and Gwyn found herself awestruck by the way the corners of his eyes crinkled. Seeing him so happy – being so happy with him – made her heart lurch with emotion.
“Come on, sweetheart,” Azriel hummed, reaching up to tuck her hair behind her ear. “You have a day of primping and girly stuff ahead. I’d hate for you to be late.”
Gwyn groaned at the reminder. “Can’t I just stay here with you?” It wasn’t that she didn’t want to spend time with the girls – she hadn’t spent proper time with Nesta and Emerie since their shopping trip two weekends ago to find her a last-minute gown for this charity gala that Az had all but forced her to commit to. Well, that wasn’t exactly fair to say. He would never make her do something she didn’t want to do, and she had wanted to go. But now it was the day, and she had to get primped and polished alongside some of the most beautiful women she’d ever seen, and she would be out in the public eye arm-in-arm with a man that had made headlines for his wealth, good looks, and overall eligibility. It was just… a lot of attention.
“I thought women liked that sort of thing,” Azriel chuckled beneath her as he pulled himself – with her in tow – to a seated position. The redhead hummed contentedly, having conveniently ended up in his lap and curled against his chest. She could sink into that closeness, revel in how wonderful it felt to be so unabashedly comfortable and unafraid with a man. And Gwyn knew it couldn’t have been just any man. But this angel with thick, unruly ink-black hair and hazel eyes that seemed to melt into gold when they were cuddled together.
“I am excited,” she sighed, bringing her fingers to fidget together in her lap. “It’ll be fun to get all made up and wear a fancy dress.” Her shoulder lifted in a shrug. Two fingers lifted her chin, tilting it up to meet her boyfriend’s hazel gaze.
“But…?”
“I dunno…” she trailed off, lowering her gaze against the press of his fingertips. It was still a struggle to be so open with some of her feelings, mainly the ones that weren’t positive and cheerful. She’d kept that part of herself tucked away behind the easy smiles and enthusiasm, not wanting to feel that weakness or to burden others with her anxiety. Azriel shifted beneath her before she felt the press of his lips at her temple.
“Don’t hide from me, Sunshine. Your uncertainty is not a burden, and I can’t help if I don’t know what’s bothering you.”
How did he always know the right thing to say? It wasn’t fair, not in the slightest. Especially when he had typically seemed so quiet. But God, did he wield his words with intention and a depth of compassion that always sent her heart fluttering.
“It’s just… a lot of attention, I guess. A big public event, surrounded by all of these beautiful people. I’m not used to all of that –“
“You are one of those beautiful people, too, Gwyn,” Azriel murmured, and she reacted before she even had a chance to think of stopping herself – a harsh huffed laugh that made him stiffen around her. She felt fingers at her chin again, but this time they grabbed, forcing her gaze back up to him. His expression was hard, even as his inky brows furrowed in something that seemed like concern. His lips were pursed in displeasure. “Gwyn.” His tone was that of a father scolding his child, “don’t tell me you don’t think you’re pretty.”
“I don’t think I’m not pretty.” She shrugged again. “But I’m not like Mor or Elain – goddesses on Earth. Honestly, Em and Nesta and Feyre, too! They’re all stunning.” Her stomach sank as she was plunked onto the hardwood floor, something akin to a growl rumbling out of her boyfriend as he rose and ran a hand through his unruly black mane.
“Un-fucking-believable,” he muttered under his breath. Gwyn narrowed her eyes in question, confusion clouding her mind as she peered up at him. Was he… was he angry?
“Az?” She barely recognized her own voice, unused to being timid and unsure, especially around him. She blinked twice in confusion when he released a long breath, his features warming in an instant. He crouched before her and smoothed down what she suddenly realized was probably the most alarming tangle of bedhead before cupping her cheek. That crooked grin tilted his mouth and he shook his head.
“You’ve gotta be fucking blind. That’s the only possible explanation. Because I know you’re not stupid.”
Gwyn scowled and smacked his hand away. “Well that was rude.” Her long legs flailed as she tried to rise to her feet – too quickly – but she was able to grab onto the mattress to help haul herself up, too stubborn to look toward Az for assistance after his little display. And when she stood over him, arms crossed and lips pursed, she was even more annoyed to see the amusement glimmering in his eyes. Her eyebrow twitched. “I fail to see what’s funny, Aphelah.”
Azriel straightened and stepped up to her, her folded arms brushing against his sculpted stomach, that thin sliver of cotton the only thing separating golden and alabaster skin. Her chin jutted stubbornly, unwilling to cower even as she had to keep her face tilted up to glare at him. And that infuriatingly serene grin met her head-on.
“You are funny, Berdara. How have you lived nearly thirty years without looking in a mirror?”
Gwyn’s head tilted, eyes crinkling in bewilderment. “What are you –“
“Because if you had,” Azriel murmured, grasping her face in his hands, “then you would know, without question, that you are the most devastatingly beautiful woman on the face of the planet.”
“Oh,” she breathed, lungs emptying and unable to refill. His gaze was so intense, his hands so warm, the calluses of his fingertips scratching deliciously against her cheeks. She knew her eyes must have been wide with wonder, and she could feel her blush creeping from her chest to the tips of her ears. When her gaze flicked quickly to his lips – she just couldn’t seem to keep her focus away from them – his lips tilted up in a knowing smirk. He leaned in to place those soft lips on hers, melting her. She sagged into him, giggling against his mouth as she almost lost her balance. He pulled away, and those warm hands moved to the small of her back, holding her against him.
“Do you really not want to go, babe? You know you don’t have to, right?” Azriel’s brows bunched, and her heart squeezed at his words. He was always so thoughtful – considerate and patient with her even when she was likely being ridiculous. He never pushed harder than genuine encouragement and was always willing to hold her when the anxiety grew too heavy. She couldn’t have ever asked for anything more. So she smiled and lifted her chin to give him a quick peck.
“I know, Az. But I do want to. I’m just pouting because it means we’ll have to stop cuddling,” she tucked her head under his chin. “Besides, this charity gala is basically the reason we’re together. I couldn’t possibly miss it.” She felt him huff, then her shoulders were pushed back. His fingers grasped her chin and tilted her face up. Liquid gold-green pools stared down at her, swirling with conviction.
“Gwyneth Berdara, we’re together because you are kind and caring and funny and intelligent. You are an incredible woman, and that’s not even considering the fact that you’re drop-dead gorgeous. The charity gala just instigated a conversation that I should have been gutsy enough to have months earlier.” His mouth crashed down on hers, as if he was trying to convince her with one glorious kiss. Her lips parted as his tongue pushed gently through, and she brought a hand up to cup his nape and bury her fingertips in the thick silky waves of his hair. Azriel groaned her name against her lips, pulling away as if it took all of his effort. “You have to get ready. Quit distracting me.”
The redhead shoved at his shoulder. “You kissed me, Aphelah! Who’s doing the distracting?” She shrieked and ducked out of the way when he tried to lay another one on her, finally unwinding herself from his grasp. “I need to go shower, you lecher. Go make me pancakes!” Gwyn retreated from the bedroom to the deep baritone of her boyfriend’s laughter as they finally began their morning.
~~~
Gwyn barely recognized herself as she moved from the chair in front of the makeup artist to the chair in front of the hairstylist. In the days leading up to the day of the gala she had wondered how she would need to be present at Mor’s townhome for the entire day, but she’d had no idea what was in store. Mimosas, manicures, pedicures, makeup, hair… had she been at home it would have only taken her an hour or two.
Of course, she would look nothing like she did now.
It was pure sorcery. She was convinced.
A ping from her phone drew her attention, and she looked down to find a message from Azriel.
I know you’re feeling anxious about today, but just remember that you’re amazing. If you are just yourself everyone will adore you just as much as I do.
Another message came through while she was reading – a Youtube link. Gwyn grinned, cheeks heating, as the link took her to ‘Fearless’ by Taylor Swift. God, he was perfect. And so sweet and thoughtful.
“You texting a boyfriend?” the stylist asked, wrapping a section of hair around a curling iron. The redhead’s eyes met hers through the mirror and she nodded.
“Yeah,” she murmured with a smile. “I’m a little nervous. I’ve never been to an event this big and he just sent me a little encouragement.”
“Awww, that’s so sweet!” Mor bounded over. She folded herself so she was on her knees, arms and chin resting across Gwyn’s thighs as she batted her eyelashes up at her. “He is so smitten with you. I can’t wait to see his face when he sees you tonight. He’s not going to be able to keep his hands off you.” The blonde sighed wistfully. “I bet he won’t even be able to wait until you get home!”
Gwyn knew her face had turned impossibly red, could feel the heat all the way in her ears at the implication. She had always been exceedingly private about her intimate life, and about her past that had so greatly impacted it. Nesta and Em knew that she and Az hadn’t moved past kisses and cuddles, but the others probably just assumed that they did what most modern couples did when they were in a serious relationship.
“Come on, baby, don’t embarrass poor Gwynnie,” Emerie’s silky voice drifted over from the couch, and Gwyn cast her a grateful glance through the mirror. Mor heaved another sigh and got up, patting the redhead on the cheek.
“Don’t be nervous, dollface. You will be nothing less than gorgeous. I’ll make sure of it.”
Gwyn smiled at her, giggling at the pink of tipsiness that flushed her face. Mor meant well – Gwyn knew that she did – but she wasn’t worried about how she looked. It was just… everything. And now there were thoughts racing through her head about her physical relationship with her boyfriend. Did he want more? Was it expected? She knew that she wanted to explore more with him, but how was one supposed to say so? Should she just ask? What if she was bad at it? What if she had a nervous breakdown in the middle of it?
With a heavy exhale she returned her gaze to her reflection in the mirror, copper strands transforming from pin straight to soft waves and intricate plaits, pulling hair away from her face. She would never be able to replicate any of it on her own, so Azriel better not grow too attached to the look tonight. The makeup wasn’t heavy, but she couldn’t even see most of her freckles. She didn’t like that. Next time she would ask for it to be a little more natural.
And when she was fully dressed and examining herself from every angle in the full-length mirror she felt the gnawing of the nerves in her stomach, but also the flutter of butterflies. She was excited. Maybe not for the crowd or the attention, but to see Azriel and for him to see her. To be at his side, to receive his smiles, to feel the possessive satisfaction that he was willing to show the world that he was hers.
~~~
“Az, put me down!” The woman in his arms could barely form words through her giggle fit.
“Absolutely not,” he answered, unable to contain his grin. “Your feet hurt.” She slapped at his shoulder, even as she leaned her forehead into his neck.
“Of course they do. I just wore strappy heels all night. That doesn’t mean you need to carry me up to your apartment.”
“Does it not?” Azriel chimed as he reached the door. “Now hold on so I can get my keys.” She sighed against him, but didn’t protest further as her grip on his neck tightened. He lowered his arm quickly and fished his keys from his pocket, bringing it back up to cradle her in record time while turning their bodies to unlock the door. He took his time making his way through the apartment, reveling in the softness and warmth of Gwyn’s silk-clad body gathered against his. His thoughts drifted back to when he’d seen her earlier, heart fluttering and muscles tensing at the memory of the first moment he saw her made up and in the exquisite turquoise silk gown. She was a goddess on Earth.
When they made it to the bedroom, he settled her gingerly onto the bed and knelt down, fingers working at the straps on her shoes. “Az, you really don’t have to –“ he shot up and cut her off with a kiss. Pulling away he stroked a finger down her jaw.
“Hush, sweetheart. Let me take care of you.” The rosy dusting over her freckled cheeks made his heart swell in his chest. Tilting his lips in a soft smile he returned his attention to her shoes. “I never understood how women wear these. They look like absolute torture.”
“Well, beauty is pain. Or so they say.” Gwyn’s voice chimed, a sweet melody floating down to him. He chuckled.
“If beauty is pain, then you must be in agony every second of every day.”
His girlfriend groaned, her leg twitching in his hand as she dramatically flopped back onto the mattress. “Oh my god, Aphelah, that was the cheesiest damn thing I’ve ever heard. I can’t deal with you.” Azriel’s hands remained steady, even as his shoulders shook with laughter. He often found himself in awe of how much she made him smile, how often they would fall into fits of giggles together. And this was no exception, her playfully brutal honesty always making his eyes crinkle as he grinned.
Quiet filled the room, only interrupted by the soft sounds of her breaths as he finally managed to get the first shoe unbuckled and removed from her poor foot. As lovely as she had looked tonight, he wouldn’t wish those strappy heeled torture traps on anyone. Attention moving to the other shoe, he found himself slightly more adept at freeing her. But even as he removed her second shoe she remained quiet. He thought maybe she might have fallen asleep, until a soft, thoughtful tone drifted from above him.
“Az?”
His brows furrowed at how timid her voice seemed. Pushing up off the edge of the mattress he stood, looking down at her. “Gwyn?” Her eyes – God her eyes – shimmered even in the dim light of his bedroom. They seemed to glow, to reach out to him with unkempt, unapologetic emotion. He could get lost in them, bask in them. She reached up a hand, a silent request. Reaching out, he grasped her long delicate fingers and pulled her up. When he let go she clasped her fingers in her lap and lowered her gaze to them – a sure sign that she was nervous. So he knelt before her, knees on either side of her dangling legs, placed his large palms over her hands, and leaned in to look up into her ebony-lined teal pools. “What is it?”
“The girls were talking today,” she sighed. “Mor said something about how you wouldn’t be able to keep your hands off me after seeing me. I know that nobody really knows how we are when we’re alone together, but it got me thinking.” Her cheeks were turning pink, and he could see the flush creeping over her ears, so he gave her hands a gentle, encouraging squeeze. “It’s going to sound silly,” she huffed.
“It won’t sound silly,” he murmured. “You can tell me anything, Sunshine. You know that.” At that she seemed to relax a bit, a dazzling smile forming.
“I… I’ve been thinking that I want… more,” Gwyn explained, barely louder than a whisper. “I want to be more intimate with you, but I… I don’t know what to do or how to start or… anything really. I feel stupid having to ask for it, but at the same time it’s the least embarrassing option.” She shrugged. Azriel felt something pinch in his chest, his soul joyous that she wanted to explore intimacy with him.
“It’s not stupid at all, babe. Let’s start with this: what have you done in the past?” He left off the implied ending to the sentence. Before him. But he wasn’t prepared for how her eyes widened, the beautiful blush that had painted her cheeks draining before she turned her face away from him.
“Oh… I…” Her words were strangled. He could feel the oily thickness of shame and regret in her words and her reaction, and the gravity of what it meant threatened to shatter him. Dear fucking God, how had he not known? “I… I guess I never really said…” she stammered. “I’m sorry, I… I should’ve… told you.”
“Oh, Gwyn.” His heart broke as he lifted a had to cup her cheek, turning her freckled face back to him. “That night was the first time…” Her chin dipped once in confirmation, but to her credit she didn’t cry. Her eyes shimmered, filling with wetness, but the tears didn’t fall. He felt like an idiot, having never even considered that a woman in her mid-twenties may still be a virgin. His hand slid to the back of her neck and pulled her down to press his lips to her forehead.
“Okay, Sunshine. I have an idea. You want to get into something comfy and watch a movie?” Gwyn nodded, but he didn’t let her go. Not yet. He shuddered a breath, leaning his head against hers. “I’m so sorry, Gwyn. I wasn’t thinking.”
“It’s okay. You couldn’t have known.” Fingers grazed his cheek, and he lifted his eyes to find hers. She was smiling at him. Somehow she still smiled, even though he’d stuck his foot straight into his mouth and made her recall the most traumatic experience of her life and what had been stolen from her that night. She angled her chin and kissed him softly before leaning back up, motivating Azriel to stand again. He made his way around to the dresser and pulled out some sweats.
“Go ahead and change and then we’ll snuggle on the couch, okay?”
~~~
Azriel was still cursing himself when his girlfriend padded through the doorway from the bedroom in loose lounge pants and a thin light blue t-shirt. She’d washed off the makeup, and he grinned at seeing all of her freckles again. Sure, she had looked gorgeous for the gala, but she was beautiful without all that. Her hair was piled on top of her head, loose strands falling haphazardly around her face. He opened his arms and she walked into his chest with a shy grin as he let his arms wind around her back.
“Do you want to hear my idea? Or do you just want to sit and cuddle?” he asked, squeezing her tight. Gwyn giggled in his embrace, the laughter vibrating against his breastbone. He wasn’t sure if she still wanted to explore that intimacy after his careless slip.
Her muffled answer was, “What’s your idea?” Palms flattened against his chest, the warmth seeping through his shirt. Azriel pressed his lips to her hair.
“You said you didn’t know where to start. So I thought maybe we could just relax on the couch, watch a movie,” he began, throat working as he tried to put the thoughts together in a way that didn’t sound crass. “But we’d not wear our shirts. So you could get more comfortable with our bodies touching, skin-to-skin.” They stood there for a few moments, Azriel’s hands skating up and down her back as apprehension spooled in his belly. Maybe she wasn’t ready for that. It didn’t matter to him if she wasn’t – he’d wrap her up and hold her close no matter what. When her shoulders rose and fell with a heavy sigh he pulled back, curling his hands around her upper arms. Her lashes lifted as her gaze found his own.
“I think we could do that.” Her smile was timid, but her eyes were trusting. Azriel took a couple steps back and pulled the hem of the white cotton garment over his head. He had cuddled with Gwyn without a shirt that first night and following morning, but never since. She hadn’t seemed to have a problem with it, but he felt that it would be something that might pressure her. Like it would be some sort of imbalance. And he never wanted her to feel like she owed him anything when it came to their intimacy. “Well, that’s just not fair.”
He lifted a brow. “Pardon?” The redhead just rolled her eyes before giving him a pointed look.
“You’re gorgeous, Azriel. Your face. Your body. Jesus, you’re perfect. It’s not fair,” she huffed, but her face started to flush. Stepping forward, she lifted a hand, but stopped short with a tiny gasp. Her bottom lip caught between her teeth and she lowered her gaze and her hand. “Can I… touch you?” His heart lurched at her request. For his consent. So careful. So considerate. So incredible. He closed the distance between them and grasped at her fingers, pulling them up and placing them against his abs.
“Of course, sweetheart. That’s the whole point,” he teased. A laugh bubbled up his throat as she scrunched her nose and stuck her tongue out at him. But then her other hand joined the first against his skin, and it was like he was set ablaze. Her touch was tender and light, fingertips tracing the contours of the muscles he worked hard to maintain and leaving trails of goosebumps in their wake. Azriel kept his attention on her face, her eyes following her hands. It was as if she studied him, his flesh, the hills and valleys that his fitness regimen had created, scars, blemishes. Her focus was so intense, as if she wanted to memorize every part of him. And he wasn’t sure how to respond, having never been prisoner to such unrelenting, all-encompassing attention. Her fingers continued their exploration, up and over his chest and shoulders and lighting rivers of fire down his arms. Before she made her way to his hands she let go, stepping closer to him and pressing her palms to the small of his back. It became an embrace, then, as she leaned her cheek against his chest and ran her hands up his toned back.
As much as the executive wanted to hold the woman against him, he kept his hands at his sides, allowing her to be in full control of this experience. Her words vibrated against his chest as she murmured, “You’re beautiful.” So quiet he felt it more than he heard it. Then those soft, moonlight-pale hands returned to his front and drifted up to cup his jaw, where she found him still staring intently at her. Gwyn pulled his chin down and found his lips in a brief, gentle kiss. The tenderness was breathtaking. He watched her as she stepped away from him, her teal eyes wide and determined, as if she were giving herself a mental pep talk and grounding herself in him.
Then she took a deep breath, clutching the hem of her t-shirt with crossed arms, and ripped it over her head before she could give herself another moment to second-guess.
It was like he’d been punched in the gut, air rushing out of him and muscles going rigid. His imagination was colorful, and he’d painted pictures in his mind of what she looked like beneath the faded jeans and t-shirts she usually wore. But there was no comparison to the real thing. Creamy skin, dotted with freckles, shone nearly white next to the dark bralette that covered her pert breasts. Her stomach was toned, belying her own dedication. The freckles dusted more heavily over her shoulders and arms, having seen the sunlight much more often. His attention returned to her face, her stare still on him. Waiting. Uncertain.
Fuck, she was just…
“Exquisite.”
Her chin dropped then, lashes lowered, even as her freckled cheeks burst into flame and a ghost of a smile tilted her lips. Her hands clenched and relaxed and she took a small, timid step back toward him. Azriel dared not move – not a step, not a lifting of a hand to her jaw as he so desired to do. Every motion, every touch, would be her decision and hers alone. She took another step, surer than the first, and then brought her toes to touch his. She still didn’t meet his gaze, and he held his breath as she grasped his wrists and guided his hands to her hips.
“Gwyn,” he breathed, finally drawing her eyes. Her expression was not tight or anxious, but more… relieved. As if her feeling his hands against her skin had lifted a weight from her. “You okay?”
“Yes,” she rasped with a nod. She let her fingers roam up to his shoulders. “Your turn,” she snickered softly. He kept his hands planted but stroked his thumbs against her stomach.
“You’re sure?”
She flashed him a wry grin. “That’s the whole point, Aphelah.” Her skin was like velvet, soft and luxurious, as his callused fingertips wound to the small of her back and then snaked up as he held her against him. Gleaming teal pools locked his gaze in place as he was guided only by touch – her hands moving to grasp the back of his neck and his hands feeling the warmth of her flesh against his palms. Azriel kept his exploration brief, choosing instead to lean in for a tender kiss. Then he grabbed her wrists so she would free him and pulled her back to the couch.
He sat on the end, shoulder leaning against the armrest and a leg bent against the cushions along the back. He palmed the throw that was slung over the back, grabbing it just as Gwyn sat between his legs and laid back against him so he could drape it over their legs. Then he wrapped her in his arms, hands splayed out across her bare stomach. “Still feeling okay?” he murmured, leaning in so his lips brushed the shell of her ear.
“More than okay,” she giggled quietly, turning her head and brushing her lips to his jaw. His heart swelled with pride and love. Everything about her made his heart race, his breath hitch, his soul soar. Love was such a strong word for something so new, but it all just felt so… right. But he didn’t want to risk the words tonight. Not after the incredible strides she’d already taken. So he pressed a kiss to her temple.
“You’re so beautiful, Gwyn. You are beautiful and amazing and fearless.” He wrapped an arm tighter around her and adjusted them so they could more comfortably see the tv, but as he started feeling around for the remote her voice stopped him.
“Az?”
“Yes, Sunshine?”
Gwyn wriggled in his grasp and he loosened his grip, allowing her to turn her body so they were chest to chest. Her cheeks reddened slightly at the compromising position she’d found herself in, but she reached a hand to trace a finger down his jaw. He grinned at her adoringly, letting his hands settle around her waist.
“This is going to sound crazy and you’ll probably think it’s too much, but…” she started, averting her gaze for a moment. When her lashes lifted to reveal her eyes to him again, his breath was caught at the fire burning there – an emotion there he thought he understood, but was too practical to hope for. “I… I love you, Azriel. I know it’s only been a few weeks. But you’ve made me want things that I haven’t wanted in years. You make me feel safe. You’ve never treated me like I’m broken or fragile. And whenever I think of what my future would be I just can’t imagine it without you. And I just had to tell you, even though it might be too mu-“
He didn’t let her continue, knowing that she was rambling through the anxiety of such a confession. Instead he cut her off with a bruising, passionate kiss. His lips moved against hers with purpose and longing, a message he hoped would soothe her uncertainty. She broke the kiss, pulling back with a sigh and a cautious smile. Azriel’s smile was wide and silly, at least he assumed it was. He cupped her cheeks in his hands and let himself drown in her ocean eyes.
“I love you, too. I love you, Gwyneth Berdara. It may well be crazy, but I don’t fucking care,” he vowed, brushing tendrils of copper back from her beaming face. “I was just thinking that very thing, but I didn’t want to freak you out after you’d taken such a big step. You’ve overcome so much and I’m just so damn proud and awestruck and I can’t believe you actually want to be with me just as much as I want to be with you.” He couldn’t stop looking at her. He wouldn’t. Her eyes like the sea, stars reflecting off the water. Her smile, bright and full of hope. Her cheeks rosy with emotion and splattered with freckles. She was everything.
Everything.
And when she kissed him again, holding herself against his bare chest and letting him touch her skin with no fear, he knew that he couldn’t imagine a future without her, either.