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Life for seventh-year Gryffindor Lee Jeno should have been relaxing. It was his last year at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, and he was more than ready to leave the four walls of the castle that he considered home for the last seven years of his life. After Hogwarts, he could finally fulfil his dream of being an auror and he simply couldn't wait.
But just like everything in his life, it's not that easy. Not when he has an ongoing rivalry with a batchmate from the Ravenclaw House, Huang Renjun. The small, gentle, extremely intelligent muggle born Huang Renjun.
("It's not a rivalry when it's only you who says you're rivals," Na Jaemin, his best friend from Slytherin, reminded him in the past several times. "I bet he thinks you have severe eye problems because you always glare at him when he passes by. I mean, you do have eye problems that’s why you’re wearing those glasses but he doesn't know that."
"Shut the hell up, Jaemin," Jeno snapped. Jaemin guffawed beside him.)
For the better part of their scholastic life at Hogwarts, Jeno found himself neck and neck in terms of academics, extra-curricular activities, special awards, and more, against Renjun much to his dismay. This 'rivalry' (Jaemin insisted on using quotation marks when referring to it to spite him) started for Jeno way back in their second year.
The reason? Huang Renjun won fair and square when they got paired up for a duel in Professor Ten's Defence Against the Dark Arts class.
Prior to the scheduled Gryffindor vs. Ravenclaw duelling activity announcement, Professor Ten had assigned them their duelling partners, and told all the second years to practise stunning and disarming spells. They will be having a practical examination about it the following week on a raised wooden platform in front of the castle’s entrance with several other professors watching and assisting them. Jeno remembered feeling Jaemin’s sceptical eyes bore holes beside him as they listened to Professor Ten’s roll call. In Jeno’s mind, that was the golden opportunity to show off his inborn talent in defensive spells. Coming from a family of Aurors, he had first hand experience when it came to practical executions of spells used in duelling.
But did Jeno practice when Jaemin asked him to during the weekend? Technically yes, he did practise. He managed to disarm and stun Jaemin once and he thought he was good to go after that. Jaemin protested they need to do it a few more times to master the spells but Jeno said he didn't need any more preparation. He bid Jaemin goodbye in the courtyard to join Haechan and Jisung in playing Wizard’s Chess in the Great Hall, promising his best friend he will give him his after dinner dessert as thanks for ‘practising’.
So when he faced Huang Renjun on the duelling platform, he was convinced that he could take on this petite, soft-spoken boy from Ravenclaw. He could brag to Jaemin that he got it under control and he told him so.
With their wands raised and at a ready, he looked Huang Renjun in the eye and smirked at him in an attempt to intimidate Renjun. The latter didn’t seem bothered by the gesture which made Jeno’s eye twitch in annoyance for a split second before he dialled back in the duel. The moment Professor Ten shouted "GO!", Jeno didn't even got the chance to open his mouth to say the incantation as he felt the spell hit him square on the chest.
He clearly underestimated Renjun because the next thing he knew, his back met the wooden platform with the Ravenclaw's voice shouting "Stupefy!" ringing in his ears. The clapping of their classmates turned into white noise, and Jeno’s whole body was drenched in humiliation as he laid there unmoving. His glasses were balancing on his nose bridge for dear life, and his wand was somewhere around him as he lost hold of it when he was catapulted in the air.
He swore from that day on that he will not be defeated by Huang Renjun in any way, shape, or form in the future. Never again. He had an image to uphold, and he will not be seen as a wimp. For a 12-year-old wizard from a prominent wizarding family, it was a big deal for him to lose against a small muggle born boy like Renjun. He would see to it that Renjun will have to compete with him for top marks in every aspect of their school life.
The Gryffindor gave Jaemin a blow by blow of the duel during supper and when he told him what he had decided, he thought Jeno was being ridiculous.
"Are you surely going to see this through? Why can't you just accept that Huang Renjun has the upper hand because, news flash genius, he actually prepared for this class? I told you to practise with me last week but you didn't listen, remember? And now you're sulking like a kicked puppy," Jeno remembered Jaemin nagging him to no end, talking him out of his decision of the rivalry. "Renjun is clearly a better dueller than you so I suggest you let it go. You should be concerned on how to pick up your grades for Defence Against the Dark Arts. Leave Huang Renjun alone. Use this failure to push you to be a better Lee Jeno, not to beat Renjun. That’s childish."
"Aren't you supposed to be on my side? Why are you defending Renjun? You clearly don't understand, Jaemin. I want to win! And what’s wrong with being childish? We’re literally twelve year old children, Jaeminnie. We’re allowed to be childish!" Jeno complained with a small pout, his appetite long gone even before supper started.
The Slytherin sighed audibly and continued to eat his Shepherd's Pie. "There are no sides here, Nono. I'm just being rational. This is not going to end well should you continue, I'm telling you that now. Just because we’re twelve doesn’t mean we have to employ such elementary tactics."
Unfortunately for Jaemin, Jeno wasn't listening anymore. Jaemin, as much as he loves his best friend, wasn't as competitive as him and he never seemed to get angry. Jeno thought that Jaemin was too nice for his own good and incapable of holding a grudge. He was the complete opposite of Jeno who could harbour grudges as if his life depended on it. This was the reason why they click well as best friends. They complement each other's personalities.
Maybe that's why Jeno couldn't simply let this go, and Jaemin will never understand where he's coming from.
And so it began after that fateful day. Jeno started to take his studies more seriously. He knew he was intelligent but he was not keen on submitting his requirements on time, the downfall of his academics during his first year at Hogwarts. He started using a planner to keep track of his tasks and spells he had to practise. He would do advanced studies in the Common Room or in the library if he wanted a change of scenery. His face was buried in books as he finds references for his essays. He aced his tests and practical exams, having learnt that it was better to rehearse days before taking the scheduled examinations.
The old laid back Jeno disappeared and was replaced by a goal-driven and determined Jeno.
In addition to studying earnestly, he joined clubs and volunteered to help around the castle. One of the things he did was to help Professor Kim Doyoung, their most terrifying professor, in cleaning up after their Potions classes. He extended his hand as well to Professor Taeyong in tending the plants in the greenhouse for their Herbology class.
These deeds didn't go unrewarded which made Jeno elated. He was given House Points quite often, adding them to Gryffindor's score that made them a candidate to win the House Cup. Sure enough, Gryffindor won the house cup in Jeno's second year and it motivated him more to continue what he had started.
But alas, after that year, Ravenclaw swooped the House Cup from their third year to their sixth year, all thanks to Renjun's exceptional deeds that greatly benefitted the school. When Renjun was made Prefect in their fifth year, he had a lot of responsibility to take care of on top of being an excellent student. Even with those under his belt, Renjun would still prove that he had a lot more to offer. Professor Qian Kun, their Headmaster, would gladly announce during the awarding ceremony this: " Mr. Huang Renjun had shown exemplary service to our school and will hereby receive an additional 100 points. If my arithmetic is correct, Ravenclaw wins this year's House up! Congratulations, Ravenclaw!" Professor Qian would clap his hands and then the Great Hall decorations would be changed to the official colours of Ravenclaw, blue and bronze, replacing the Hogwarts banners.
And no, Jeno didn't memorise this because he wanted to but because year after year, despite all of his efforts of tuning it out, he would hear different iterations of Professor Qian praising Renjun. He was not a fool to deny what Renjun did every year greatly benefitted all of them including the staff and the house elves. Renjun looked absolutely radiant as he stood in front of the Great Hall with Professor Nakamoto Yuta, the head of Ravenclaw, hands holding the House Cup.
Even with a heavy heart of losing to Ravenclaw, Jeno continued helping around the castle voluntarily. What Jeno didn't realise was he started to look forward to doing these tasks and it didn't matter if he would be given House points after. He sincerely enjoyed helping his professors and listening to their occasional personal life stories here and there. The House Cup competition was pushed back in Jeno's mind which he found quite peculiar since isn't he doing all of these to win? So why the sudden change of heart?
Well, it was certainly much less of a concern for him in the following years. Not after he found out that Professor Doyoung was not really that terrifying and was married to a muggle banker named Jeong Jaehyun. The couple has a six-year old daughter named Jaerin and Professor Doyoung goes home every weekend to their muggle home not too far from Hogwarts. "Hogwarts allows professors to go home to their families now, unlike before where we have to stay all school year in the castle. There are no more threats to us since the Second Wizarding war which gives us more freedom," Jeno remembered Professor Doyoung telling him as they carefully bottle that day's batch of Draught of the Living Dead.
It was from helping around where he also learned that Professor Taeyong used to be an Auror before retiring at the age of 35. He told Jeno that he was in a constant state of anxiety due to the hazards of his job. The worry that he would be safe after a day on the job didn't help his mental health and eventually, he quit. He recalled that his supervisor tried their best to convince him to stay but he declined. Thankfully, Professor Qian and Professor Taeyong were friends during their student days and he was offered the post of Herbology professor. After the latter took specialty courses, he was accepted to Hogwarts to teach the subject. Taeyong shared that he knew Jeno’s dad Donghae when he was a new Auror in the Ministry as his dad was the one who gave them their onboarding training. This was three years before Lee Donghae decided to get married to his long time girlfriend, Kwon Yuri who was also an Auror.
So maybe it wasn't all that bad. He just likes to think it was because of the rivalry in his mind.
Another thing that Jeno had done that he thought he would never do was to stay in the castle during winter break. As a student studying abroad, he always looked forward to coming home to South Korea on winter breaks. Jeno wasn’t the biggest fan of the harsh winters in the United Kingdom.
But once he heard that Renjun was going to stay at Hogwarts in their fourth year, he had to stay.
Jaemin asked him in confusion why he insisted on staying on the day they were supposed to board the Hogwarts express to which Jeno didn't give an answer. His best friend raised an eyebrow in question and looked over Renjun's table. He saw that Renjun had no luggage packed beside him and he was playing Gobstones with his friends, Lee Mark and Zhong Chenle from Hufflepuff. "Really, Lee Jeno? You're staying because he will?" was all Jaemin could utter as he stared down at Jeno who busied himself by taking out his wand and twirling it in between his hands.
"It's not what you think it's about," Jeno firmly said before Jaemin could even utter a word out.
"Pray tell what I think it is about then," Jaemin said exasperatedly. He reached out and patted Jeno's back as if he was consoling the other. "You know, if I’m not your best friend, I would have sworn that you like him more than you hate him. You are too observant of his every move, Jeno-ya. Are you sure you don't have a crush on him?"
Jeno shrugged Jaemin’s arm off him, his eyebrows knitted together. "You're out of your mind if that's what you think, Jaeminnie. Me, crushing on Huang? What a joke. The biggest joke I have ever heard in my life."
Jaemin took a good look at Jeno for a solid minute and went back to finishing his porridge without another word. In a few minutes, Professor Suh called the attention of the students who would be coming home and Jaemin, Jisung, and Haechan bid Jeno adieu.
Liking Huang Renjun? Just the thought of it sent shivers down Jeno’s spine. Jeno shoved Jaemin's comment in the depths of his mind and that was the end of it.
That's what Jeno thought.
It was four days after the start of their seventh year and Jeno was subjecting Jaemin once again in his Renjun centred rants over breakfast. The Great Hall was already packed with students, the aroma of breakfast and freshly brewed coffee stirred in the air through the bustling student population. Jisung and Haechan were seated across from them, talking about the things they have done during summer vacation.
"Jeno, you are officially going mad, that's what's happening to you," Jaemin commented, stacking his plate high with waffles. He took the maple syrup bottle and drizzled some on his food, setting it down with a twack on the table. "It's literally the first week of term so can we not have this conversation? Besides, it's our NEWTs this year so I would appreciate it if you keep your Renjun pining rants to a minimum until graduation."
Jeno sputtered once the words registered in his mind, spilling pumpkin juice all over himself. He quickly grabbed a few napkins and dabbed them on his lips to remove the sticky liquid. "Excuse me, Na Jaemin, I do not pine for Huang Renjun! what the heck, i almost choked!" He reached in his robe pocket and took out his wand, muttering “Tergeo” to clean the remainder of pumpkin juice on his clothes and on the table.
Jaemin was unphased. "But you didn't, so calm your horses. You're being too dramatic."
"Very funny, Jaemin. Could you please keep your voice down because others might get the wrong idea. Hear me out here, Jaems. I’m suspicious of him. What if he was brewing Felix Felicis during the summer break and he intends to use it this year to stay on top? Aren't you thinking he might be doing something dodgy? How can someone always be on the top rank?" Jeno asked these questions consecutively as he waited for his goblet to be magically refilled with pumpkin juice.
Jaemin snorted in response, looking at Jeno as if he disrespected his ancestors. "You're telling me that Huang Renjun would do something illegal like that? Huang Renjun, Ravenclaw Prefect for five years and now Head Boy, will risk breaking the school rules because he's scared he'll lose his place in our classes? Do you even hear yourself, Jeno-ya? Renjun is smart, that's why he stays on top year in and year out. That's the answer you're looking for," he remarked, his hands busy cutting his waffles into smaller squares. "But if you're that convinced he's doing something dubious behind everyone's back, you could try and trail after him to see if he does something. Merlin, I feel like I’m enabling you at this point."
"Are you suggesting that I stalk him? Isn't that kind of creepy? I don’t want to look like a stalker…" This time, Jeno looked a little wary but the cogs in his mind were already running about with strategies on following Renjun throughout the school this year. He thought it's plausible as long as he could keep his distance while he followed the Ravenclaw student around.
"Well, if you put it that way, it does sound kind of creepy. But it's one of the ways I could think of so you could finally shut up about this silly rivalry of yours. Listen here, Jeno. I've told you this countless times but Renjun genuinely looks like he enjoys learning about magic and you are a fool for viewing it as petty competition. All because you want to win against him. You should take a page from Renjun's book and mind your own business," Jaemin finished eating his waffles and his plate disappeared after he arranged his fork and knife beside each other on it.
Oh boy, Jaemin wasn't wrong about Jeno wanting to win.
Getting the details of Renjun's schedule for the first term wasn't hard to do since pretty much all seventh years share classes. Ravenclaw and Gryffindor had their NEWTs subjects scheduled together except for Herbology that the former shared with Hufflepuff. Jeno also discovered that Renjun signed up for additional subjects; Ancient Runes and Arithmancy. Jeno thought it was too much even for a seventh year but what did he know? He was doing fine with his subject load but he wouldn’t seek out to add things he needed to worry about.
For the better part of their first month back to school, his friends continued to mock him for his utmost dedication in proving that Renjun was employing questionable tricks up his sleeves. Jeno ignored them as always. He was on a mission now. He could just imagine the triumph once he caught Renjun cheating his way to the top. It would be glorious.
At the two month mark of Jeno following Renjun around, Jeno had already memorised the Ravenclaw’s schedule. To no one's surprise, he would spend most of his time studying in the library alone after his classes. Sometimes, he would see him with Mark and Chenle by the Dark Lake. He concluded that it might be the trio's favourite place to hang out and they'll either play games, talk, or study there. Come weekends, Jeno would see Renjun at Hogsmeade with his fellow Ravenclaws, play with his cat Minmin on castle grounds, or stay at the Great Hall talking to other students. He didn't follow him at all times but in Jeno's opinion, Renjun lives a boring lifestyle. It was quiet, safe, albeit boring. It suited him and it worked for Renjun which was the most important part.
One particular event finally made Jeno wake up from it all. He realized that yeah, he was a fucking creep, and this whole petty rivalry bullshit was absurd.
It was a Sunday morning in November when Jeno decided to go out to have a walk down the pumpkin patches. He donned his jacket on and set out to his destination.
On his way, he saw Renjun, Mark, and Chenle on their way probably to the Dark Lake once again. All of them were carrying something in their arms, and since Jeno figured out he had nothing to lose in following them like other times, he did just that.
The three friends settled down beside the big rock just a few feet away from the shore of the lake, a blanket all spread out for them to sit on. There were different containers of food laid out in front of them. Jeno knew that Renjun's parents would send him Chinese food frequently to ease up his homesickness. Jeno wanted to barf from the sappiness of it all but that was just a personal opinion. He watched in silence as they started to open each container one by one, hearing happy squeals from Chenle and Mark.
"Ah, as expected of Uncle Huang! He packed extra lao gan ma for our toast again!” Mark exclaimed, picking up a piece of scallion pancake from one container with his chopsticks while his other hand held a bottle with red stuff in it that Jeno assumed was lao gan ma . "Oh, Renjun-ah. Mum wants to extend her thanks to you for the hot pot broth recipe you gave her! Dad ate a lot, according to her."
"Please tell auntie my sincerest welcome then!" came Renjun's soft voice, cheeks puffed up as he chewed his food. Jeno might have found it cute but he wasn't there to look at Renjun's adorable cheeks. He was spying on his arch-enemy.
"I really am looking forward to the fact that once we pass our NEWTs, we get to go home with Renjun for the summer! I swear, my parents are much more excited than I am," Chenle mentioned, picking up a few pieces of stir-fried vegetables and eating them.
Renjun smiled, his eyes crinkling into half-moons at the sentiment. "Oh, mama and baba are also preparing a lot at home, you know? It'll be the first time that we'll be having Non-muggles stay. I hope our humble abode is up to your expectations. We might not have the amenities you're used to, though, but we'll try to make your stay as comfortable as we can," the Ravenclaw stated, his own chopsticks poking around his rice.
Mark offered Renjun a gentle smile, reaching over to pat the other on his thigh. "Aigoo, Renjun-ah. It's 2021 already, nobody cares about outdated views on muggles, half-bloods, and purebloods. We are all equals! I am sure your home is more than enough for us. We cannot wait until we can go!"
"Hear, hear! Besides, magic is a talent that can be honed. It doesn't have anything to do with what type of blood flows in your veins, Renjun ge, " Chenle chirped with a smile.
That seemed to placate Renjun's doubts and Jeno saw him smile wider, and it was one of the most endearing sights he had seen in a long while.
There was an ugly feeling forming at the pit of his stomach after hearing the small exchange from the three friends. At that point, Jeno felt like he should leave and go far away from them. So he stood up and began walking back to the castle, mind filled with thoughts as his feet trudged the dirt path.
It wasn’t a secret that Renjun was a half-blood, born to a Chinese muggle father and a Chinese witch mother. Actually, everybody knew who was the pureblood, half-blood, and muggle. What Mark said was true that nobody gives a damn whatever your bloodline is in this day and age. Hearing that Renjun felt that he somehow needed to give his pureblood friends a heads up about their home struck a nerve with Jeno.
He and his friends all came from pureblood lineages, something that the four of them didn't give much importance to. The same cannot be said to some members of their families, unfortunately. While it was true that the aftermath of the Wizarding War brought a lot of change on how they view muggles, there were a few who refused to get with the times.
For Jeno's family, it was his grandparents that were not scared of making their opinions known to anyone who listened. He didn't share the same views with them in any way but there was only so much a child could take on how muggles and wizards coupling together to produce half-bloods were an abomination. What made it worse was the fact that his grandparents were already alive during the Wizarding Wars yet they still staunchly believed in creating chasms between bloodlines. Growing up hearing the vile sentiments they have on non-purebloods definitely affected him.
Jaemin was right. This rivalry was ridiculous. Jeno could have saved so much time enjoying his school life instead of fixating on Huang Renjun.
Following that day, it dawned on him the culprit of his intense preoccupation on this rivalry: he was angry that a half-blood wizard managed to win against him, a pureblood wizard from a prominent family of Aurors.
It was such a momentous realisation that it made Jeno want to vomit as soon as he had processed it all in the safety of his dorm room. He was in denial of it first because he kept telling himself that he was not like his grandparents. He was nowhere near like them. The more he let the dust settle, the more he understood that he had allowed his internalised prejudice towards half-bloods and muggles to cloud his thinking. There was regret bubbling inside of him after knowing he wasted years of his life disliking Renjun.
Renjun was a great wizard with a pure heart and a radiant smile that could light up the world. He had been an absolute tool all this time.
Jaemin's nosy self noticed the sudden change in Jeno's everyday routine. Jeno stopped following Renjun around and Jaemin also noted that whenever the Ravenclaw was near, Jeno would try to avoid being in his line of sight.
"Whatever may have happened to my dearest Gryffindor best friend's quest of exposing Huang Renjun's illegal ways of being the top student?" Jaemin finally confronted him next Saturday morning as they sat down on the bleachers at the Quidditch pitch. They were watching Hufflepuff and Ravenclaw practise for their upcoming matches. "You haven't given up, have you?"
"Jaemin, I stopped doing that last week. I- there's something I must tell you," Jeno's voice trembled a bit, his eyes a little glassy as he stared at Jaemin.
Jaemin’s smile was replaced with a straight line on his lips. "Sounds serious… Alright then. Let's hear it."
Once he started talking, he was like a dam breaking; Jeno couldn’t seem to stop spilling everything that was in his mind. Everything around them was insignificant, Jeno focused on telling the one person he trusted the most about his discovery. Jaemin may have a partiality of making jokes even in serious situations but he gave all of his attention to Jeno, listening to every word he uttered.
Jeno finished with an exhale and he leaned back in relief. His whole body felt lighter, thankful to finally be able to say the words he needed to say.
"First of all, thanks for telling me this. It must have been hard, huh? Hearing those words thrown around as you grow up surely will have an effect on you in ways we might not know or never know, I’m afraid. That was a thing of the past now, though, which was good news. What matters is that you were able to admit and slowly accept that it was the root cause of your desire to win against Renjun. No offence, Jeno, but yeah, your grandparents are annoying, talking about how in the 'old days' that there were not many non-magic folks being born and studying in magic schools. They were alive when Voldemort and his lackeys were killing people! It’s honestly a disrespect to the ones who survived the war to live to tell the tale. Tch. They can't accept that their outdated views are outdated. It's not your fault, alright? It means you're learning."
"It feels good saying that aloud. Thank you, Jaem. I really have been stupid," Jeno admitted with a frown.
"Awareness is always the first step, Jeno. I know you're working your way of expelling it out of you and that counts as something already. You should be proud of that because I am. You'll unlearn all of them, one step at a time, okay?" his best friend smiled fondly at him.
"I'll keep that in mind. It's just a lot to take."
Jaemin paused for a moment as they fixed their eyes on one of the Hufflepuff Beaters passing the Quaffle to his teammate, and successfully shooting the ball through one of the goal hoops. "I know and you shouldn't force yourself to change overnight. Take it easy. You’ll be fine, Nono. So now that's out of the way, when are you going to admit that you like Renjun?" Jaemin inquired, leaning back against the bleachers.
well, shit , Jeno thought, trying to avoid meeting his best friend's gaze. Jaemin could really read him like an open book and he felt his cheeks heat up at the mention of Renjun. "I am still not sure what I feel about Huang. I’m warning you, though! No one has to know about this or else I will not help you with your Transfiguration tasks," Jeno threatened, pointing his forefinger towards Jaemin's direction.
Jaemin made a gesture of zipping his lips. "Your secret is safe with me, Mr. Lee. But the more you deny these feelings, the more it'll try to come to the surface, Jeno-ya," the Slytherin said in a matter-of-factly tone. "It's only a matter of time that all these facades crumble down, and you will have to come face to face with Renjun.."
The Gryffindor felt a little cornered after that talk with Jaemin, resulting in him being keyed up all the time. He kept turning his head back, nervous if he ever crossed paths with Renjun or any of his friends. Jeno felt exhausted but thankfully, there had been no Renjun encounters thus far.
With the recent developments in his life, Jeno decided to stay at Hogwarts for winter break for the last time. He wrote to his family about it and surprisingly, his parents expected it from him. They cited that since it was his last year, he would cherish the remaining time he was here. What they didn't know was that he needed as much time away from his horrid grandparents as possible. He figured that he had to mull things over and then maybe, he would be ready to face them again. For now, Jeno wanted to be alone.
All of his friends went home because unlike him, they didn’t have any family members that think muggles and half-bloods were scum of the Earth. They sent Jeno small trinkets via their owls which he deeply appreciated as it kept him busy. His parents sent him homemade Korean dishes as Christmas got nearer and Jeno will always be forever grateful for the delicious kimchi jjiggae, bulgogi, japchae, and kimbap s sent over. He also shared them with other students during meal times.
It was now three days until Christmas and Jeno ws bored out of his mind. He looked out of his dorm window, his eyes gazing at the snow-covered grounds. The whole castle was adorned with Christmas ornaments and overall, it's warm, cosy, and homey. Jeno thought he had been cooped up inside his room for quite some time so he put his jacket over his shirt before setting out to take a walk around.
He greeted a few acquaintances along the way, exchanging pleasantries with each other. There wasn’t much to do until Christmas Eve and Christmas so he expected that the halls would be empty. This meant he would have no one else to talk to which wasn’t really his goal. After a few minutes of walking, he found himself ascending the Astronomy Tower, the hushing of the winds echoed through its brick walls. It must be freezing outside and Jeno felt glad he was inside the castle.
Jeno was humming a soft tune under his breath as he took each step to the top of the tower, only to be met by someone sitting on the wooden floor, the person's back facing the doorway. The person appeared to have set a picnic on the floor with a blanket spread under them, their wand's tip lit up and a few opened containers of food by their side.
The said person turned around once they heard the footsteps. Jeno was having a hard time trying to recognise this person because he couldn't see their face properly until he heard the soft tone ask "Jeno? Lee Jeno? Is that you?"
That's when he realised it was Renjun, dressed in a sweater two sizes too big on him and a pair of khaki pants. Oh, he is so tiny. "Hi, Renjun. I'm sorry, I didn't mean to startle you. I was just walking around and I found myself here. I must take my leave if I'm being a bother-"
"No, no, Jeno. It's fine. I was surprised, that's all. Wait, I thought you'd be home? Why are you at Hogwarts?" Renjun asked, his form relaxing once the tensed air melted away.
"Um, may I join you before I answer that? Will that be okay?"
"Oh. of course! I don't mind company. Come sit here," Renjun smiled, his cheeks puffing up as he patted the space next to him.
Jeno walked to where Renjun was on the floor, taking off his shoes before sitting down beside the latter. "Thanks," Jeno said.
There was a comfortable silence between them, the two seventh-year students watching the snowfall on the glass panes through the big window in front of them.
Jeno then remembered he hadn’t answered Renjun’s question yet. "I didn't go home this year because I thought I would never experience a Hogwarts winter break again in the future. I wanted to leave Hogwarts with a beautiful memory of Christmas," Jeno uttered the answer, a half-truth at that, to which Renjun hummed in acknowledgement. "And you? I noticed that you almost always stay here for winter break. Don’t you miss your family during these special times?"
Renjun leaned back, his arms steadying him in place. "I miss them a lot. I only went home during my fifth year because my parents booked an expensive getaway for all of us. But most of the time, tickets back to China are costly so I try to not make them worry about the expenses by staying here. Sorry, I didn't mean to overshare but that's the truth."
This new information made Jeno feel more contrite about his previous attitude towards Renjun. Oh, the Ravenclaw was truly exceptional. "No worries, really, and I'm glad you felt comfortable sharing it with me. You're a great son, Renjun. Your parents are lucky to have you as their child," Jeno commented, crossing his legs for a more comfortable position.
"That's quite surprising to hear knowing that you consider me as your arch-enemy, Jeno Lee," Renjun remarked with a chuckle, a little bit of playfulness in his tone. He looked sideways to meet Jeno’s eyes, Jeno noted that Renjun’s eyes were twinkling under the soft moonlight seeping through the windows.
"You caught up on that, huh?"
"You're not good at hiding it, Jeno. I could literally feel your eyes drill holes all the time behind my head during classes. Or trying to win against me in our practical exams."
Jeno wanted to have the floor swallow him whole at that moment. "Oh my god, could you please pretend I never did any of that? That was so embarrassing, what the fuck… But I'm turning over a new leaf, I swear! It is a little late but better than never!" The Gryffindor insisted, his voice rising a little bit in volume to prove his point.
Renjun snickered in amusement, his nose scrunching and Jeno's heart beat fast from the sight. "Alright, I believe you. It's quite funny most of the time, actually. No harm done."
They must have talked for hours after that, recounting memories of their years in this school ranging from funny, sad, exciting, and everything in between. Renjun would bring up a particular event that involved Jeno's ridiculous antics, making the latter embarrassed but eventually, they would laugh at it. Thank the heavens that Renjun found it all amusing.
A million stories passed, and Jeno's stomach grumbled loudly from hunger. He realised he didn't have any supper before coming to the Astronomy Tower. He was expecting another round of teasing from Renjun but instead, he offered him his packed scallion pancakes, dim sum, and toast with lao gan ma . "My parents like to send me more food than usual during Christmas time so please, help yourself, Jeno. I'm not really sure if you have tried muggle made food before but I hope it'll ease up your hunger for now. We can eat dinner later down at the Hall."
Jeno smiled widely at the generous offer, taking a piece of scallion pancake from the container with the chopsticks Renjun had provided. He also took note of the indirect invitation to eat with Renjun in the Great Hall after their little picnic. "Thank you so much, Renjun. I'm rather famished, truth to be told. So I apologise if I finish it all."
"By all means, eat as much as you like! Baba loves it when I share the food they cook for me, and I'll be happy to report to him that I have another non-muggle friend who enjoyed his cooking."
Jeno's eyes were now clear from the cloudiness of his immaturity as he spent this time with the person he thought was hindering him from being on top. Renjun was just him, plain and simple. It was Jeno who made a big deal about it because of his inability to accept defeat. He even considered Jeno as a new friend even after knowing the fact Jeno considered him as competition.
Somehow, that made Jeno say something to Renjun before he proceeded to devour his food. "Hey, Renjun. This might be too late but I would like to apologise for everything I have done and how I made you feel, intentionally and unintentionally," Jeno sincerely stated, angling his body towards Renjun's direction. "I may not be able to show you how I'm regretful of my past actions but as I have said, I am turning a new leaf. I spent so much time disliking you when in reality, it was me who was the problem. That duel we had in our second year greatly humiliated me and I thought trying to win against you would make me feel better about myself. I was wrong... You're a wonderful wizard and I was too blind to see that. So, I'm sorry..."
Renjun’s gaze softened as he listened intently to what Jeno had to say. It warmed Jeno’s heart with the kind gesture. Can’t this man get any more perfect? It’s unfair. "I accept your apology, Jeno. There really isn't a need to apologise, if I’m being honest. But still, thank you for telling me, and if it helps you, I forgive you. Don't beat yourself up too much, mhm? We only have a few months before we leave Hogwarts, so what do you say about being friends?" Renjun suggested with another breathtaking smile, his expression calm, and it comforted Jeno all the more.
Jeno gulped, knowing that being friends with Renjun would not suffice. He was made aware of his true feelings now, and he was not going to pass on the chance to tell Renjun about it. Damn it, Jaemin's right once again , Jeno thought as he heard the thundering beats of his heart pounding in his ears. Goodness, he likes Renjun a lot. Like a lot.
"I don't mind being friends but I do want to be uh... more than that," Jeno admitted in a small voice.
"More than friends? Really? Am I hearing you right, Jeno?"
Jeno mustered up all the remaining courage he had left and reached out to hold Renjun’s delicate hands in his. "Yeah. I like you and I would like to let you know. I don't think I could sleep without you knowing about it. And if you would kindly accept this as my invitation to get to know you better, I would be the happiest wizard right now."
Renjun chuckled again, fondness swimming in the gaze they shared once Jeno uttered the words. "You move fast, huh? Well, what did I expect from Lee Jeno, right? God, I didn’t think this would happen so soon… In any consolation, I've had a crush on you since our fourth year so... I bet being more than friends is possible. I've admired you for a long time, Jeno. Mark and Chenle know and they kept teasing me about it," Renjun announced almost in a whisper, his fingers slowly intertwining with Jeno’s.
Jeno thought he heard wrong but looking at Renjun's blushing cheeks from the limited lighting, his heart beat louder, warmth spreading all over his chest. "Is that true?"
"It is, Jeno," Renjun answered. He then looked up and Jeno followed suit. Above their heads hung a cluster of mistletoe, its white buds waving at them and swaying from the cool breeze. "Look. Mistletoe," Renjun murmured, his eyes now stared back at Jeno's own.
"Yeah. They’re pretty… Like you." Jeno agreed.
No one knew who leaned in first. Jeno closed his eyes and he felt the gentlest lips against his own, and he thought time stopped right there and then.
Jeno never felt this peaceful. He hoped it would last long, preferably with Renjun beside him.
