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He knew there would be an adjustment period when Tiffany finally came home. And he would go through anything for her, but his energy was flagging.
It was no surprise that she had nightmares, especially with how the war ended. But they had gotten to the point Tiffany was afraid to sleep. Even nodding off briefly was enough to send her screaming. Johnathan felt guilty for thinking it, but he was grateful he couldn't hear it. She looked in so much pain, the strain in her face and how she held her throat when she had to talk.
For the last few days, she had refused to sleep. Even laying down made her nervous. Something would have to give, but for now, his main concern was helping her through it. But he didn't know how much longer he could last.
Tiffany would try to let him sleep. But left alone with her thoughts for any amount of time and she would shake him awake in moments.
They signed quietly to each other about absolutely nothing at all. Anything to keep them awake. About the past, future, dreams they had as children, just something to stay awake.
Johnathan's head started to droop, it had been days without actual sleep and his body was flagging. Grumbling quietly, he stood up.
Which panicked Tiffany who signed to know where he was going. She sat up straighter, staring at him with panicked eyes with dark circles under them.
"Coffee," he tiredly mumbled. Not that it would do much for how much he'd had the last few days, but he needed something even if just the heat to focus on.
While he fumbled with his stove and tried not to cuss when he burnt himself, Tiffany worried about what she'd been putting her best friend through. It wasn't fair that he stayed up just because she was afraid to sleep. He had work he still had to do. Work that kept people alive. While she wasn’t sure she could handle the darkness alone, she couldn’t make him suffer with her. She couldn’t lean on him for everything.
Stepping back into the room with a strong cup of coffee he hoped would do something for him, he was surprised to see Tiffany had left. Her disappearing wasn’t uncommon when the world had gotten too much so, he shouldn’t have been surprised. But when she was afraid of being alone, he couldn’t believe it was just that. Groaning, he quickly downed the coffee, coughing at how it burned. At least that would keep him up for a little while. Jonathan grabbed his bag and hurried out the door to find her before she got too far away. Someone had to look after her when she couldn’t take care of herself.
He lost a lot of time looking around to see if she’d tried to go home first, but he could climb faster. Off the beaten trails, he knew the way by heart. It was always the same place, the same old lean-to barely big enough for them now that they were grown and fire big enough to fend off any darkness. Through the trees and up tall cliffs, he made his way to her sanctuary. Where there was nothing but surviving until she could do more again.
When he made it, he saw Tiffany there arms wrapped tight around her knees and staring at a meager fire. That was unlike her and made him worry more. No matter how far gone into being overwhelmed she was, Tiffany always made a proper fire. First thing first, Johnathan found some worthwhile wood to keep the darkness back. Prodding at the fire until it came fully alive, he kept watching her.
She hadn’t perked up yet, but he wasn’t expecting that either. But she was there, at least in body. Still staring off, she had at least moved her eyes away from the fire. But still closed off, not speaking or signing. This wasn’t a normal overwhelmed. It was more than she’d ever experienced and couldn’t ever tell.
But that didn’t stop Johnathan from taking care of her. They’d been through enough together that he could trust her to get through it, and he wouldn’t leave her side until she was ready. That was what it meant to be Hearts and he took it seriously, like any other pair. Once the fire was burning brightly in the night, he sat beside her in silence.
She never talked when she was here and he didn’t expect that to start now. Just the peaceful quiet of the crackling fire and the wind between the trees. A comforting stillness, like nothing could reach them so long as they stayed in the safety of the fire’s light. After a while, she laid her head on his shoulder, reminding him she was there.
Leaning the side of his head against hers, Johnathan draped an arm around her side. The crackling of the fire was soothing, and knowing she was safe was enough for him to drop his guard. Bit by bit, he finally started to drift off again. Only this time, Tiffany didn’t wake him.
She was still afraid, but it was easier here, and he needed the rest. Tiffany took comfort in him being there despite her leaving. Healing would be a long time coming, but for now, she could manage. Eventually, she would sleep again. Until then, Johnathan was there to keep her safe.