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Adrien spun his fork around and around with his finger on the table while resting his cheek against his fist. He had been waiting a good twenty minutes now for his father to come and join him. Nathalie had said he would be coming for dinner tonight, he had promised. It had been at least three weeks, maybe more, since Gabriel had shared a meal with his son and Adrien had been hopeful, but he cursed himself for it. He should have known better.
It was just another disappointment in a long line of disappointments, both as Adrien and Chat Noir. It started about a month ago when he couldn’t get away from a photoshoot to transform. By the time he had arrived at the fight, Ladybug had already gotten Vesperia and Polymouse to come and help and the battle was all but over. She looked annoyed and told him she had waited longer than she should have for him to come before she had to get some help.
“I do have a life outside of being a superhero you know.” He reminded her, not caring that the other heroes were listening. “There was no way I could leave without compromising my identity, and since you don’t want to know it, I’m not about to expose it to anyone else.”
“I’m sorry Kitty.” She apologised, her eyes searching the ground. “I shouldn’t have been so harsh. I’ll try to find a way to keep you in the loop, I promise.”
Chat had let out a long sigh. “It’s okay.” He said, his ears pinned down to his head. He really wanted to believe her.
Then last week Ladybug’s Lucky Charm told her that they needed Viperion and Purple Tigress for the fight. She started mumbling to herself about how long it would take to find both of them because she knew Viperion was on the other side of town. Chat offered to go and get Viperion instead, forgetting that it was Adrien who knew about Luka being Viperion and not Chat.
“No, I can’t tell you who he is. I’ll have to go myself.” She bit at him.
Chat had frowned at her. “But I know about Max being Pegasus and that Kagami is Ryuko. What’s wrong with me knowing about Viperion?”
“That was different.” She tugged on her pigtails in frustration. “I can’t do this right now, alright. You know how important identities are, just let me do my job.”
“You don’t trust me, that’s it isn’t it?” He snapped back, folding his arms. “What was that the other day about keeping me in the loop when you don’t even trust me with the identities of our allies? You’re just like everyone else in my life, nothing but empty promises.”
He took off to keep the akuma occupied while Ladybug left to get the others. The rest of the fight had been frosty to say the least, and Adrien knew it was obvious he had been taking his frustrations out on the akuma. Once it was over he did the obligatory “pound it” for the sake of Viperion and Tigress, and then left, not looking back and leaving the others to deal with the victim.
Since then he had kept all talk relevant to the akuma and nothing else. He knew that there had been a few times Ladybug had tried to approach him, but he didn’t think he could take any more empty promises from her. She had someone she could talk to, since she felt it was okay for her to share her identity with a friend, but he had no one. Even on patrol he kept conversation to the weather or other mundane topics, just enough to keep up appearances for the public, but the change in demure hadn’t gone unnoticed and there was speculation in the media that the relationship had fractured.
As Adrien continued to play with his fork, what was really eating him up was Marinette, or more specifically the way he had treated her that day. After having to dodge questions about his relationship with Ladybug, a tedious photoshoot with Lila and his father chewing him out over the quality of said shoot, Adrien had started the morning in a bad mood. He had been paired with Marinette for a chemistry experiment which normally he would have enjoyed, but today everything was getting on his nerves. In hindsight Adrien realised Marinette had been tired and distracted, but when she dropped the beaker, spilling their work on the floor, Adrien had snapped at her. It wasn’t like him at all as he would normally be quite patient with Marinette and her clumsiness.
Of course, once the words had left his mouth and his brain had caught up it was too late. The shocked look on her face and the hurt in her eyes stung him to his very core. He had taken his frustrations out on the one person who had been nothing but kind to him. He tried to apologise, but she just gave him a short “it’s fine” before telling Mrs Mandeleieve she wasn’t feeling well and could Alya go with her to the nurse. Adrien spent the rest of the lesson cleaning up and cursing himself while dodging eye contact with Nino who was giving him a worried look.
Adrien banged his forehead onto the dining table. Right now he felt like the worst person in the world. He was pulled from his self loathing by the sound of the dining room door. Lifting his head hopefully, his eyes were met by those of Nathalie.
“He isn’t coming, is he?” Adrien asked sadly, even though he knew the answer.
“I’m sorry Adrien.” The assistant replied, a note of sympathy evident in her tone. “Your father…”
“Don’t worry about making up excuses for him, Nathalie.” Adrien interrupted, standing up from the table as the cook brought out his dinner. “I’ll take my tray to my room. I might as well read over my school notes while I eat.”
Adrien sat his tray on his computer desk, bumping the mouse as he sat it down which brought up his desktop pictures of him and his mother on the screen. He sank into his chair, pushing his dinner to one side.
“I wish you were here.” He said quietly, closing his eyes to try and hold his tears at bay.
“I might not be your mum, kid, but I’ll always be here for you.” Plagg said, sitting on the desk in front of his chosen with a slice of his favourite cheese.
Adrien opened his eyes and gave his Kwami a sad smile. “Thanks Plagg.” He said, giving the little black cat a scratch behind the ears. “I just feel bad for snapping at Marinette the way I did. She didn’t deserve that.”
Plagg wasn’t entirely sure she didn’t deserve it really, but he couldn’t say that. “Well, if it worries you that much, nothing says sorry like a nice big wheel of camembert.”
“I’m not sure a wheel of stinking cheese is quite the message I’m wanting to send.” Plagg grumbled about people having no appreciation for quality.
Adrien looked at the soft pink rose in the vase on his dinner tray. Picking it out, he contemplated the blush of colour. It reminded him of the blush he often saw in Marinette’s cheeks.
“What about if I got her some flowers?” Adrien asked. “People give flowers to say sorry right?”
“Sure kid.” Plagg mumbled between bites. “Be boring and give her flowers like you do with Ladybug.”
Adrien looked sadly at the rose and put it back in the vase.
“You’re right Plagg. Giving Ladybug roses didn’t do much good, did it? Marinette deserves something better than a lousy flower.” He then let out a heavy sigh. “I think I might just go to bed.”
Plagg watched as his chosen got up, leaving his dinner untouched on the tray. He flipped his tail in annoyance. If only Ladybug could understand how much her lack of trust hurt him, and if it’s one thing Plagg hated, it was seeing his kitten hurting. He got enough of that from his so-called father.
Floating over to Adrien’s bed, he snuggled in above Adrien’s head. As he expected, there was the soft muffled sound of crying. Not knowing what else he could do, Plagg curled up next to him and began to purr.
~~~~~
It was around 2am when Plagg frantically pushed Adrien’s face to wake him up. “Kid…kid! Something’s wrong.”
Adrien turned and looked at his Kwami with bleary eyes before he noticed the blue glow outside. Quickly getting out of bed, he pressed his hands against the window and saw what looked to be Sandboy floating by on his pillow.
“The Sandboy just checked in, now nightmares can begin.” The akumatized boy chanted as he floated along, more blue dust filling the air.
“Agh, not again.” Adrien groaned. “Quick Plagg, before we get trapped in here - Claws Out.”
Vaulting himself out of the window, Chat had already begun to see the evidence of the nightmares of Paris’ citizens coming to life. Amongst the chaos, Chat focused his eyes on a red blur swinging past to retrieve some last night party goers caught up in the mess.
Jumping down, he scooped up a girl with a broken stiletto and moved her out of the way of the Zombie parade that had taken over the road.
“Do you suppose his akuma is in the pillow again?” He asked Ladybug who had joined him on the side of the road behind a parked car.
“I think so.” She replied. “We need to lure him lower down, then you can…”
“I hate you Chat Noir!” A voice yelled from behind them. Chat cringed at the sight of the nightmare Ladybug. “I will never trust you. You are nothing to me. I wish I had a better partner than you.”
“Join the queue.” He muttered, but the real Ladybug heard him still.
“Chat I would never…” She began, but Chat turned to her with a sad smile.
“It’s okay Ladybug, I know she’s not real and it’s just me projecting.”
Ladybug went to speak again, but the words caught in her throat and her eyes widened in fear. Chat furrowed his eyebrows and turned around to see what she was looking at.
“There you are, m'lady. I’ve been feline so lonely without you.”
Chat stood transfixed looking at a mirror of himself, but all in white with clear blue eyes.
“Come on Marinette, don’t look at me like that. You know I didn’t mean to destroy everything, but you stopped loving me and you broke my heart. I just want your Miraculous so I can fix everything and we can be in love again.”
“Marinette.” Chat whispered, looking at her in stunment. A thousand different moments ran simultaneously through his head of the girl who sat behind him in class with the shy smile and kind eyes. Ladybug’s eyes, which right now we’re looking at him, well the other him, terrified. No wonder she had been so distracted in class today, Chat thought. He hadn’t let her talk to him about what had happened between them and she must have been weighed down by it as much as he had.
Without saying another word, Chat scooped her up in his arms and leaped away from the visions they had begun approaching and took shelter behind a concealed rooftop. Placing Ladybug down, Chat saw that she had begun to cry and she sank to her knees.
“You weren’t supposed to find out like this.” She sobbed. “This wasn’t how it was supposed to happen.”
“Do you mean your identity or…”
“Either.” She cried. “My identity or about Chat Blanc.”
Chat crouched down beside her and tentatively placed a hand on her shoulder. “Chat Blanc isn’t just a nightmare, is it? It’s a memory.”
Ladybug looked up at him with teary eyes and slowly nodded her head. Chat didn’t understand what that meant exactly, but he felt his mouth go dry.
“The Sandboy just checked in, now nightmares can begin.”
Chat and Ladybug looked up to see Sandboy passing close by, but they were concealed enough not to be visible.
“Do you think Hawk Moth now knows?” Marinette whispered in a panic. “About me?”
“No.” Chat shook his head confidently. “Sandboy was a good block or more away when your name was spoken. He wouldn’t know.” That seemed to have given her some comfort. Chat then gave her a soft smile. “It really is you, isn’t it Marinette?”
“Yes.” She said softly. ”I’m sorry Kitty, for everything.” Lightning lit up the night sky and Chat wrapped his arms around her, holding her tight.
“It will be alright.” He said comfortingly. “Let’s just deal with Sandboy and we can talk about it afterwards.”
~~~~~
It didn’t take long for the two of them to defeat Sandboy and release the akuma. After taking the young boy back to his mother, the skies opened up and a shower of rain descended on them.
“Well, since you know it’s me, you might as well come to my place until this passes.” Ladybug said, looking up at the clouded sky.
Arriving at the bakery, Ladybug dropped her transformation, her hair and clothes drying in the process. Chat on the other hand felt as miserable as he looked.
“Do you mind if I…?” Chat asked tentatively, gesturing up and down at his wet form. “I’m kind of making a puddle here.”
Marinette looked at him with wide eyes. “I’m not ready for you to show me who you are just yet. Wait here and I’ll get you a towel.”
Marinette left through her trap door with Tikki following behind. Chat figured she no doubt wanted to converse with her Kwami about the accidental reveal. He wished he could do the same. Chat couldn’t sit down because he was still wet, so he stood looking around the familiar room. She had pictures of her friends up on her cork board. He smiled at one showing him goofing around with Nino and Kim one lunch time. He felt lucky to have such great friends.
After a while, Marinette finally re-emerged with a fluffy white towel. She handed it to him before wrapping her arms around herself and sitting on her chaise.
“You must be feeling pretty confused right now.” She said, looking away from him.
Chat ran the towel back and forth over his head. “About that white version of me, yes, but not about you being Ladybug.”
Marinette turned her head and looked at him curiously. “You knew?” She asked.
“No.” He replied. “I’ve suspected it before.”
“But how?”
Chat placed the towel down on the desk and sat next to Marinette on the chaise. “Let’s leave that for a minute. Why don't you tell me about this Chat Blanc…and why he haunts your nightmares.”
Marinette bit her bottom lip and looked for Tikki. The little Ladybug Kwami sat on her lap and gave her an encouraging nod. Taking a deep breath, Marinette breathed out before she began.
“A few months ago, Bunnyx appeared out of the blue and took me to a time in the future where you had been akumatized. I don’t know exactly what led to that happening but you had destroyed me, Hawk Moth and all of Paris with your super charged cataclysm.”
Chat could only look at her in disbelief, even though he knew she would be telling the truth. He could scarcely consider a time where he would do such a thing, and yet he could see the facts reflected in her eyes.
“It…it became apparent during the fight that we knew each other’s identities and that we were…we were…you know…”
“Dating?” Chat prompted. Marinette nodded her head.
“Something had gone wrong though. Hawk Moth found out or something and you, we’ll Chat Blanc, didn’t think I loved him anymore. Whatever had caused the catastrophe he wanted to fix it by joining our Miraculous.”
“Did I hurt you?” Chat asked, his voice pained. Marientte placed her hands over his gloved one and gave it a squeeze.
“You were akumatized Kitty. You weren’t acting as yourself. You didn’t want my Miraculous to hurt me, you wanted to make the wish to fix what had happened. You only wanted us to be together again.”
Chat nodded his head trying to absorb this information. Somehow they had been a couple, she had loved him and they had been together. He honestly couldn’t fathom how that would happen with the way things had been between them lately, but it had and he knew that he would do anything to protect that.
“So, I guess your Miraculous Ladybugs fixed everything then?”
Marinette nodded slowly. “Yes, we’ll that timeline anyway, and the mistake I had made that led to it,”
“What was that?” He asked. Marinette gave him a wide eyed look. “What? I’m a cat, remember, I’m curious.”
Marinette looked away from him and to where she was still holding his hand. “It’s not important now.” Marinette said, letting go slinking back into the chaise with her arms wrapped around herself. “The important thing was you didn’t find out my identity and we weren’t a couple.”
Chat leaned forward and rested his forearms on his knees, his eyes on the ground. “Is that what scared you? That we were a couple?”
“No.” She said quietly, like her heart was broken into a million pieces. “The fact that we had been a couple didn’t scare me, it was the fact that we loved each other so much that it destroyed the world.”
Chat turned to face her and took her hand in his. “Marientte, I can’t even begin to imagine how any of this happened, but, you know that you fixed it right? That however it was that our identities were revealed then isn’t what it is now?”
“I guess.” She replied, focusing on his eyes, on the soft look he was giving her.
“And, well Bunnyx hasn’t shown up yet so maybe this time it will be okay.”
“I don’t know.” Marinette contemplated, still letting Chat hold her hand. “I don’t know if I’m ready for what revealing your identity might mean. My feelings are all in a muddle right now. The truth is that a part of me was falling for you. After that day though, when I encountered your akumatized self, I was terrified. I pushed you away because I didn’t want you to love me. I didn’t want you to become akumatized because of me.”
“How do you know I was akumatized because of you?”
“Because you told me. You said that it was our love that destroyed the world, that I didn’t love you any more.”
Chat shook his head. “That was an akuma talking. You don’t know what really happened and it’s been erased now anyway. You don’t have to be afraid anymore m’lady.”
Marientte looked up at him with tears in her eyes. Then she smiled. “You called me m’lady.”
“Of course I did.” He smiled back. “Marinette, knowing it’s you under the mask hasn’t changed how I feel about you.”
His cat ears dropped when she looked away from him. “I don’t think I’m ready for that Chat. I don’t think I’m ready to know who you are. I’m not sure my heart can take it.”
Chat gently touched her chin with his clawed finger and turned her face towards him. “You already do Marinette, better than you know.”
Marinette’s mouth dropped open slightly. “You mean…we know each other? In our civilian lives?”
Chat nodded slowly. “Let me tell you who I am. You see, I always told Ladybug that I loved her, but I also know that I had been falling in love with Marinette too.”
Marinette bit her lip and looked down at their joined hands. He had been making small circles on the back of her hand with his thumb. Chat held his breath waiting for her answer.
“Okay.” She said, barely above a whisper. She looked up at him and gave him a soft smile. “Maybe it is time I knew who you are, Chaton.” There was a wavering of emotion as she spoke and Chat was worried.
“Are you sure?” He asked. “I don’t want you to feel under any pressure to know if you’d rather not.”
Marinette nodded her head and closed her eyes. “Say the words Kitty, I’m ready.”
“Claws in.”
Adrien watched nervously as Marinette slowly opened her eyes. Her blue orbs locked onto his emerald ones before welling with tears. Without a word, Marinette suddenly lunged forward, wrapping her arms around his neck and burying her tear streaked face into the crook of his neck.
“I’m so sorry.” She choked out between sobs. “I’m so sorry for everything.”
“Hey, hey, hey.” He soothed, rubbing her back with his hand. “I understand now M’lady, I do.” He held her tighter as she trembled in his arms. “I’m not asking you to love me Marinette, I just want to be there for you, on both sides of the mask.”
“But I do love you, Adrien.” She murmured against his hair and Adrien felt his heart somersault in his chest. Adrien sat back slightly, holding her arms in his hands and searching her eyes.
“You mean…I was the other guy?”
Marinette let out a choked laugh. “I can’t believe I didn’t see it.”
Adrien chuckled too. “Well, that makes two of us.” He said, pulling her to his chest again and resting his chin on her head. “Don’t worry though, there’s no pressure. We can take it slow and get used to this new part of each other. We have our whole lives.”
Adrien cupped her face in his hands and planted a soft kiss on her forehead. “I’m going to marry you one day Marinette Dupain-Cheng, just so you know.”
Marinette giggled and pushed him away playfully. “Gawd, you really are my alley cat aren’t you?”
“I thought we had established that.” A grumpy black cat Kwami said, floating near Adrien’s head and flicking his tail around in the air with his paws folded. “Do you have any idea how much grief you caused him? And if you want to get home some time tonight kid, you better feed me.”
“Plagg.” Tikki chided her counterpart. “Can’t you see they were having a moment?”
“So.” Plagg scoffed between bites of the cheese Adrien gave him. “Now that they know there will be nothing but long, soppy, drawn out moments.”
Adrien and Marinette gave each other a shy smile. The sound of shuffling downstairs, though, drew their attention away from each other.
“Is it that late?” Marinette whispered. Adrien took his phone out of his pocket.
“It’s around 4:30 in the morning. I better get back before Nathalie comes to wake me up.”
Creeping quietly up to the loft, Marinette opened the latch and found it was no longer raining. Adrien called on his transformation and followed her into the cool morning air.
“You should go back inside.” Chat said, rubbing his hands up and down her arms. “You’re covered in goosebumps.”
“It’s not just from the cold.” She smiled, and Chat found it hard to breath looking at her in the pre-dawn light.
“You know, I was going to buy you flowers to apologise for being such an arse to you yesterday in class.”
“I was distracted because I was trying to think of a way to apologise to you too.” She replied.
“Well, I can think of one way.” Chat said with a glint in his eye. Stepping closer to Marinette, he hooked a clawed finger under her chin and lifted it towards him. “May I kiss you?”
“Please.” She whispered back, placing her hands on his leather clad chest and raising up onto her top toes so her lips could meet his. It was soft, and a little unsure but as far as Adrien was concerned, it was exactly what they both needed.
“Can I still bring you flowers?” He asked, and Marinette pondered for a moment, looking out at the dawn.
“At this rate, I think coffee might be more in order.”
“Coffee it is then.”
“Wait, what will I tell Alya?” Marinette suddenly said in a panic. “She’ll wonder why you're bringing me coffee”.
Chat thought for a moment. “I know. I’ll tell her I rang you last night to ask you a question about our history assignment. We got talking and didn’t realise how late it got, so I promised you coffee.”
Marinette suddenly slapped both hands on her cheeks. “Oh no! I forgot about the assignment.”
Chat chuckled, removing her hands from her face and gently kissing each cheek. “I’ll ask Nathalie if I can stay and help you tomorrow. Don’t worry about it. See you soon M’lady.” He added, kissing her softly on the back of her hand.
“See you soon.” Marinette whispered, tugging him by his bell for one more chase kiss before Chat lept away over the rooftops and into the dawn of a new day.