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Dean stood above Castiel’s body, angel blade drawn and mind askew. He began to think of all the ways that they hurt each other in the past, but Dean’s patience snapped like a rubber band when Castiel got the mark of Cain and killed Sam. He no longer recognized the angel that lay on the floor in front of him, cowering and fearing for his life. That was not the same angel that raised Dean from Hell and saved him from Purgatory. He was now the angel who made his life a living hell. Castiel took away his one reason for living, and Dean didn’t wanna live with that.
He believed this was the only way he could fix it.
Dean knew nothing would be the same.
“Dean, that wasn’t me. We both know that wasn’t me. I thought, of all people, you would be the one to most understand this. You’ve had the mark too and…” Castiel debated for his life.
Dean interrupted, voice deep and raised with anger, “I may have had the mark of Cain, but at least I didn’t kill anyone close to me. Not in cold blood like you did… like you did to my fucking brother… not like you did to Sammy…”
“I didn’t MEAN to do that. You know that. I know that. We can bring him back like we always do... plus, you did try to kill me and Sam when you had the mark... you can't just forget about that,” Castiel argued.
"Shut the fuck up, Cas. I know I did that, but... you went through with it... I wasn't there to stop you and I... I should've been there, Cas... I should've been there for Sam..." Dean could no longer contain his tears, “He’s gone. He’s gone, Cas, because of you.”
And, fuck, did Dean hate admitting that. All of that.
Dean sobbed, tears running down his face and down his chin, falling onto the tiles of the floor below him. He hunched over, clutching the angel blade in his hand, wincing in mental pain. He allowed himself to cry for the first time in a while. He allowed himself to mourn. He didn’t know how to handle pain quite this bad. He thought he could trust Cas. He knew he could trust Cas, but that trust was gone. And Cas, as much as he hated to admit it, was right. He did know what it was like to have the mark. It was torture, that’s what it was. It forced to do things you didn’t wanna do, kill people you didn’t wanna kill. The logical side of Dean knew that, but right now, at that moment, Dean didn’t know anything. All he knew was that Castiel, someone he trusted, someone he loved, killed the person he cared about most. The only family he had left. The only family that wasn’t murdered in the apocalypse. The only family member that ever gave a single shit about Dean Winchester. The only one he lived for.
Castiel mustered up enough courage to speak, he wanted to explain himself, “Dean, look, I…”
Dean snapped back, “No, Cas. I’m not letting you explain yourself. I’m not letting you tell me all the fucked up things you were thinking as you stabbed my brother… repeatedly… I’m not letting you be the hero of this story. You’ve been there, and you’ve done that, it’s about time you die a villain, Cas…”
“Can you please just give me this one chance?” Cas questioned, growing tired and impatient. He knew that Dean would never hurt him. Let alone kill him. He was starting to become less afraid.
Dean gave in and went quiet.
“Thank you…” Cas said, sighing, “I would never hurt Sam on purpose. I would never hurt you on purpose.”
“But you did. You killed him,” Dean interrupted again, with a colder tone.
“That wasn’t me, Dean. I told you this. You have to understand that… I… Dean, I’m trying. I’m trying so hard to control this mark but… You have to understand, it’s hard.” Castiel explained, voice breaking.
“Cas?”
“Yes, Dean?”
“You disgust me.”
Castiel became quiet after hearing that, never thought that he would hear those words leave Dean’s mouth. At least not about him.
“I don't care about what you have to say, Cas, and how dare you try to explain yourself after killing my brother. After killing Sam, your best friend. You knew he looked up to you. You knew he thought the world of you. He would talk about you all the time to me in the bunker, you remember? When you bailed on us, just stopped answering the phone? Fuck you, by the way, for that one. He would always worry about you. He’d worry your angel power would go all fuckin’ wacky on you again during a battle. He’d worry that you… that you’d be dead… you know that, right? He worried you would die, but then you’re the one who killed him. He adored you. He wanted to fight like you. How dare you fucking betray him-- how dare you betray me…” Dean said, voice becoming angrier as he continued.
Castiel went quiet for a moment.
“I’m a monster…”
Dean sighed, “You’re pathetic.”
The two men became quiet. The tension was thick and it filled the air surrounding them. Castiel feared for his life, while Dean feared for his. He knew that the mark could possess Cas at any minute now, or Cas could attack him to save himself, but Dean didn’t care. He had nothing to live for anymore anyway. Sam was dead and Castiel was no longer himself.
“And to think I was about to hear you out…” Dean began, voice cracking, “Cas, much like everyone else, you don’t get a second shot. Not for what you did, not for how badly you hurt Sam, not for how badly you hurt me. You? You broke me. Everything's gone to shit and now my brother is dead. He’s gone, and there’s no way to bring him back. He’s probably in Hell now, suffering, because of you. It’s people like you who deserve to die. Not Sam.”
“So this is how it ends?” Castiel muttered.
“Yeah," Dean confirmed, finally, "and I’ll see you on the other side, Cas.”
Dean kneeled down next to Cas as he quickly began to plead for his life. He ignored the things Cas said as he forced the blade into his only alive friend’s heart. Blood began to trickle down Castiel’s chest, staining his white button-up shirt.
Castiel struggled to breathe. He breathed quickly at first, but then calmed himself down. He accepted it, he knew he lost. Dean had won. It was over.
“Oh, and Cas? One last thing…”
Cas wanted to look up at Dean, but he couldn’t. His vision was blurring and fading as quickly as the blood was flowing.
“I fucking hate you,” Dean said, voice filled with horror and guilt, overwhelmed by the pure anger and rage he felt.
Castiel’s vision was completely gone and his ears began to ring. He knew this was it, he knew those were the last words he'd hear from Dean Winchester, and so with his last breath, his final words were drawn from his mouth like the sword that was plunged into his chest.
“I love you, too.”