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In the time before the great music and the creation of Arda, the Ainur dwelt in the timeless halls of Illuvatar.
All except two. One who was cast out, and one who ventured out willingly…
…and was horrified by what he had found.
Melkor was alone. His form brilliant, blindingly bright, and awe inspiring to behold.
He was alone. He alone among the Ainur had understanding in all things. He alone among the Ainur saw the emptiness of the universe and wished to fill it with all manner of things of his own design.
And he was alone because his spouse had left him. Maita was gone from Eru’s timeless halls and Melkor knew not where she had vanished to. In his loneliness he sought the company of his brother Manwe, but was barred from him while Manwe and Ulmo learned from Illuvatar.
And so, he ventured out from the Timeless Halls and entered the Void where he thought the secret fire might be found in hopes to create a new companion for himself.
Melkor did not know how long he wandered in the dark. There is nothing, the secret fire is not here.
And he was right. The only light which shone in the Void was the brilliance of his own form. The Void was suffocating, as if it wanted to tear his strength from him until he shined no more. Nothing exists in this place. To search any longer would be folly. His hope for finding the secret fire and the ability create for himself morphed into despair, and he turned to venture back to the Timeless Halls. He did not realize something had been drawn to him the same way a moth is drawn to a lamp.
“…Melkor…”
He paused as he heard the whisper. He felt it glide over him like vapor.
“…Melkor…” the whisper said again. A sound so quiet that it was almost imperceptible, but it was there.
He turned and faced the direction from which the whisper had emerged, his light shining in the darkness.
Something came out of the darkness of the Void and into his sight.
It looked so small and weak. It was gangly, with spindly limbs and dark eyes. “My brightest one. You’ve come for me. I’m so cold, and so hungry. So very hungry.”
Melkor looked at it with horror. “What are you?” he said with shock.
“Do you not know me, my brightest one? Do you not see the love I carry for you?”
“Maita.” His horror turned to shock, then rage. “Who did this to you? Who reduced you to this? He has made an enemy of you and I and shall feel my wrath for their transgression.”
“It was Eru. He cast me out from the Timeless Halls and banished me here. I was so alone, and so cold, and so very hungry. But then I saw the light and the light was you.”
Melkor’s thoughts were in turmoil. Eru cast her out. Why? Why would he do such a thing? What could she have done that would deserve such a punishment as this?
He reached his arms out and pulled his love close to him, his light enveloping her. “What could you have done to deserve this?” he spoke with gentleness and pity. His sorrow for her suffering was evident in his tone. “I told Eru I thought the light was beautiful. That I wanted to feel it and taste it. He denied me, and so I sought the light of the other Ainur but when Eru saw, he rebuked me and banished me here.”
How could he? He who claims to love all his creations. That we were all created the way he had envisioned us. Why would he make Maita only to separate her from all his other creations?
She matched his gaze. “Will you not give me some of your light, my love? You’re so very bright and warm, and I am so cold.”
He pressed his lips to hers and held the kiss for a moment.
“Of course I will. You were created to be mine and I was created to be yours.”
“Thank you, my love, ‘He-Who-Rises-In-Might’, my brightest one.”
She opened her mouth and drank hearty gulps of his radiance. And as she did, the darkness of the Void drew closer and closer.
“Do not be so greedy.” he told her. “I need the light to find my way back to the Timeless Halls.”
But she ignored him. Melkor felt his strength leaving him, the darkness encroaching around him.
“That’s enough!” he commanded. But Maita did not hear him, she was too engrossed in the deliciousness she had found. Her gangly form was swelling and growing in size. As Melkor felt his radiance dimming, he sought to break free from her. He pushed her away and turned to flee, but found himself trapped. Cutting between him and his path back to the Timeless Halls of Eru was a great web. It had been hidden from him in the darkness until he came upon it, his dimming light illuminating it for him to see.
Maita’s voice, which before had only been a weak barely-heard whisper, now sounded behind him like a roar.
“YOU PROMISED MELKOR! YOU SAID YOU WOULD BE MINE! I WILL HAVE YOUR LIGHT, AND THEN I WILL HAVE THE LIGHT OF ALL THE OTHER AINUR, AND THEN I WILL HAVE THE LIGHT OF ERU HIMSELF!”
Melkor found his courage and turned to face her. “You are mad, Maita. Your hunger has driven you beyond the bounds of reason.”
Maita smiled. Her form was horrifying now to behold, gargantuan even. It towered over him and leered at him with lust. “Oh, my brightest one, how dimly you glow now. You have given me so much, but I’m still so very hungry. I must have more. I must have so much more.”
She lunged at him; her mouth opened wide. She sought to swallow him whole so he would shine from her insides and so he would always be part of her.
Melkor moved backwards. Focusing his will, his form sparked and then erupted in flames.
The only flames that would ever burn in the void.
The fire burned away Maita’s web, opening Melkor’s path to safety. The flames spread and engulfed her, her voice screeching in pain. Taking advantage of the momentary distraction, Melkor escaped from her and returned to the Timeless Halls where she could not pursue him. Shutting the entrance behind him, Melkor collapsed and passed out of consciousness. He was safe, but the damage was already done. Doubt had grown in his mind about Eru’s truth. That all that Eru had created was good. Worse still, Maita’s bite, her desire for light, had left a wound in him.
He was not alone when he woke. Someone had found him and brought him away from the doors of the Timeless Halls. He looked up and saw her face. He saw her beauty and her light and felt desire where he had not before. He had to have her for his own.
He whispered her name with a pained groan.
“…Varda.”