Chapter Text
Friday, October 25, 1985
The weeks after the Byers family moved to California were some of the loneliest Nancy had ever experienced. After Barb went missing, her fear and curiosity had kept her company. Steve had been a nice distraction, but she walked away from that relationship not long after everything started to get weird in Hawkins, IN. She hardly had a chance to feel lonely after the break up, because then Jonathan was there. And with him came even more weirdness. With him came monsters, and Russians, and a darkness deep inside of Nancy that not even a floodlight could illuminate. Now she had no boyfriend (not really, at least), no plans for senior year, and much to her dismay, no friends.
So when the opportunity arose to drive Will and his mostly tolerable friends to Family Video one Friday in late October, Nancy jumped at the chance to “run into” Steve and his new friend Robin.
When they arrive at the store, Dustin, Mike, and Lucas race Steve to the new releases section. She doesn't understand why they do it, but it still makes Nancy laugh as she watches Steve try to apologize to the other customers in the store. Max takes her time following behind them, offering a high five to Robin on her way by. Robin loves it, of course, and Nancy feels a flicker of warmth at the interaction.
Nancy watches as Robin drags her eyes away from Steve and the kids back to where she stands (regrettably, awkwardly) at the front of the store. They had hardly spoken since the summer. It wasn't intentional, but the Byers family was preparing to move, so most of the last 3 months had been spent with Jonathan. It seems silly now that she thinks about it. She put so much effort into trying to save a doomed relationship when she could have been building new ones. Robin quirks an eyebrow, and Nancy knows it's an invitation, maybe even a lifeline, which she gladly takes.
"Nancy Wheeler, welcome to Family Video." Robin says it in a silly announcer voice as she sweeps her hand across the entirety of the store, as if it's a prize Nancy has just won. The whole thing is absurd, but it makes Nancy laugh, and god, it feels good to laugh again. A blush settles on Robin's cheeks. "So, did you have a good summer?" Robin asks smoothly as Nancy steps up to the counter. The question makes her pause. Was she being serious ? The smirk on Robin's face tells her that it's just a joke, and Nancy realizes that it's even an inside joke that they can now share. It was a bit morbid, but Nancy doesn’t mind.
“It was relatively uneventful,” Nancy retorts, which makes Robin huff out a laugh of disbelief.
“Relative to what? The apocalypse?” The comparison makes Nancy smile. Robin is right though. In fact, the events of the last two years have felt a bit apocalyptic when one really thinks about it, which Nancy does more often than she would prefer. The realization forces her smile to fade into something a little sadder, and she glances down at her hands. Most nights she can still smell the gunpowder and blood that has coated her delicate fingers. She wonders if Robin has those same memories, if she too can still sense the darkness in the night. “ The world breaks everyone, and afterward, many are strong at the broken places .” Nancy is startled by Robin’s voice, and she almost doesn’t register the words. They sound familiar.
“Faulkner?”
“Hemingway,” Robin corrects kindly. “You know, A Farewell to Arms , the book we’re supposed to be reading this week for AP English.”
“Right, right.” Nancy appreciates how gentle Robin is being with her, especially as she pulls her back into the moment. “Yeah, sorry, Hemingway isn’t my favorite.” The response makes Robin raise another eyebrow, and her mouth opens, closes, and then opens again.
“You’re a journalist, Wheeler,” she starts. “Shouldn’t every author be your favorite?” Nancy smiles again at this. She hadn’t realized that Robin knew about her journalistic aspirations. The thought makes her stomach twist. It’s a silly fact, though, and she feels a little foolish for letting it excite her the way that it does. Still, she shoots a confused look back to Robin, who continues, “ The best fiction is far more true than any journalism .” It’s another quote that Nancy sort of recognizes.
“Hemingway, again?”
“Nope.” She pops the ‘p’ as she says it. “That one was Faulkner.” Robin grins, and the teasing causes a flush to spread across Nancy’s cheeks. She’s flustered, and it shows in the way that she stumbles over her next words.
“R-right.” She takes a moment to compose herself before she asks, “So remind me again why we’re talking about school on a Friday night? Shouldn’t we be out partying or at least watching a movie or something?” It’s a weak attempt at deflecting her nerves, but it does the trick.
Robin turns her head to Steve and the kids to shout, "Hey, dingus, want to go over to Wheeler's house after shift to watch a movie?" The color runs out of Nancy’s face. Dustin practically squeals.
"Uhh, yeah!" With a second thought, Steve addresses Nancy, "Wait, are your parents going to be home?"
"No, they're out of town this weekend," Mike responds for her.
"Sweet, yeah, let's do it!" He pumps his fist a little as he shouts his response back to the girls.
Turning back to Nancy, Robin places her elbows on the counter and leans forward. "What, no parents? Is Steve expecting this to be a rager or something?"
"No, he just... doesn't get along with my parents. It's a long story." Nancy waves her hand in the air as if to indicate that it's not worth getting into.
"Oh, ok, cool." It wasn't that Robin seemed hurt by the brush off, but she definitely sounded disappointed that she was being left out of something important. Nancy feels an unsettling need to wipe the frown off of Robin's face, which leads to an unfortunate series of words tumbling out of her mouth.
"We slept together. He was my first. My mom was really pissed off about it. I'm not sure why I'm telling you this." At the admission, a deep blush spreads across Robin's cheeks.
"Yeah, no, totally. That makes sense."
"Yeah."
"Yeah."
Their attention is drawn away by the commotion of the kids and Steve arguing over which videos to rent, but Nancy appreciates the break in the tension. She really wishes she hadn't just brought up her and Steve's sexual history. She feels weird about having said what she did, maybe because Steve and Robin might be dating, but it could be something else entirely.
"So, you and Steve then?" Robin whips her head back around to balk at Nancy.
"What? No. Ew." She can barely answer through her laughter.
"Hey!" Nancy defends. "I dated him, remember."
"Yeah, and that's something you'll have to live with for the rest of your life, Wheeler." Smirking, Nancy leans across the counter to smack Robin's shoulder, which only causes the other girl to throw her head back and laugh even harder. When she stops to take a breath, Robin clarifies, "No, Steve and I are just friends. I promise, he's not my type."
"No?" Nancy raises her eyebrow in curiosity. "So... you have a type?" Was she flirting with Robin Buckley? No, that would be preposterous. She was here to make friends, not project her weird fantasies onto Robin. It wasn't that Nancy hadn't considered it before. In fact, she knew that she was attracted to girls in the same way that she was boys, but Hawkins, IN is not friendly to people like her. It's much safer just to keep it all inside. But as Nancy watches Robin chew on the inside of her cheek, something flutters deep in her chest. Maybe she could be Robin's type, Nancy thinks. If she's learned anything over the past two years, it's that people can surprise you.
Before Robin has a chance to answer, Dustin is dropping a handful of rentals onto the counter. It snaps Nancy out of the moment, and she clears her throat and takes a step back. Robin seems unfazed, but she throws Nancy a quick wink before she starts ringing up the videos. It makes Nancy's stomach flip, and she chokes out a, "See you later then," before she retreats back to the safety of her car.
----------
So that was how Nancy Wheeler found herself standing alone in her living room with Robin Buckley later that night. Steve had driven them over after they locked up Family Video, and he barely stopped to greet Nancy on his way down to the basement to, "Just say hi to the kids real quick."
That was 10 minutes ago.
"So this is the Wheeler palace, huh?" Robin says it as she spins slowly around to take everything in. It makes Nancy nervous. She doesn't know why, but having Robin here in her living room makes Nancy feel shaky and unsteady. It also makes her a bit aloof.
"Hardly. I mean, you've seen Steve's place, right?"
"Yeah, right." Robin responds as if Nancy had missed the point altogether. She wanders over to look at the family photos nailed to the wall, and unsure of what else to do, Nancy takes the opportunity to observe her. She’s dressed so casually that Nancy wonders how she’s even allowed to wear it to work at Family Video. But Nancy also doesn’t really mind because the outfit also looks really good on Robin.She finds herself a little bit envious that Robin looks so utterly Robin-like, but the more she considers it, the more she realizes that it’s not envy at all. Rather, what she’s feeling is attraction. Robin has a natural beauty that Nancy finds quite striking, but even more than her physical attributes, her unapologetic style and command of the physical space around her makes Nancy simultaneously overwhelmed and achingly curious. She wants to know more about the other girl, and for the first time in weeks, Nancy doesn’t feel alone.
Having taken in all of the family photos, Robin turns back to Nancy to catch her staring.
“You ok, Wheeler?” It isn’t said with any malicious intent. She seems genuinely concerned, which makes Nancy feel a little guilty. Clearly she had taken Nancy’s silence and staring as an indication that something was wrong.
“Yeah, of course.” She chooses her words carefully. “I’m just glad you’re here.” The admission makes Robin light up, so Nancy continues, “Actually, it’s been a while since I’ve had any friends to hang out with.” She’s a little embarrassed by how pathetic she must sound, but Robin doesn’t offer any judgment. She just nods along like she understands.
After a moment of contemplation, Robin responds, “Yeah,definitely. I know we don’t know each other that well, but honestly, it’s nice to be around someone that gets it. It’s nice to not have to pretend.”
“Pretend?”
“To be ok.” The sincerity in Robin’s voice breaks Nancy’s heart. All this time, she thought she was alone in the darkness, and she’s mad at herself for waiting so long to reach out.
"Yeah, it's been sort of lonely for me too. These past few months, Jonathan was so preoccupied with leaving Hawkins that he was never interested in debriefing. He just wanted to get the hell out. But I don’t blame him."
"Yeah, same with Steve.” This catches Nancy off guard. “We actually haven't said a word about it since that night."
"Oh, wow. I guess I assumed that you and Steve talked about it. I thought you two were close?" Nancy doesn’t mean for it to come out so accusatory. She genuinely can’t believe that Robin and Steve didn’t talk about everything that had happened. In fact, more than once, Nancy had been jealous over their friendship, assuming that they were supporting each other through all of it.
"And I thought you and your boyfriend were close." She says it with some bite, and Nancy is embarrassed that it had to be said at all. Robin is right. She was being judgmental and hypocritical. The worst combination that there is.
They look everywhere but at each other, and Nancy can only take so much of it before she cuts in, "So, popcorn?" It's a weak attempt at breaking the tension, and she’s walking toward the kitchen before Robin can even answer.
"Nancy, wait. I'm sorry. I just... it's been hard, you know? Steve is my best friend, and he actually knows what I went through, but he won't talk about it. And he won't let me talk about it. I don't even know what I'd say, but not being able to say anything makes me feel like maybe I imagined the whole thing. I just need someone to tell me that I'm not crazy."
"Robin, you were kidnapped and tortured by Russians. There was a giant monster that possessed Billy Hargrove and attacked us at the mall. We were saved by a girl with telekinetic powers. You aren't crazy."
"Thank you."
"So, popcorn?"
"Yeah, popcorn."