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Mark was 14 when he first met Haechan.
Birthday iyon ng half-brother niya na si Jeno. Ilang buwan pa lang nakatira si Mark sa bahay ng mga Lee at nag-aadjust pa siya sa mga pagbabago sa buhay niya.
Mababait naman ang pamilya ng tatay niya sa kanya. They didn’t make him feel like an intruder kahit na bastardo siyang anak. They are nice to him, especially Jeno. Kuya talaga ang tawag sa kanya kahit na hindi naman sila lumaking magkasama.
Naninibago lang talaga si Mark dahil ibang-iba ang buhay na kinalakihan niya sa probinsya.
He misses his old life but he promised his mom that he will try and live with his dad. Dalawa lang kase ang dying wish ng nanay niya -- na makapagtapos siya ng pag-aaral at tanggapin ang offer ng tatay niya mabuhay na sa poder niya.
Matalino at masipag mag-aral si Mark. Kayang-kaya niyang tuparin ang unang hiling ng nanay niya kung makakakuha siya ng scholarship. Pero matimbang ang pangalawang hiling nito. Wala naman din siyang dahilan para tumanggi dahil wala na ang nanay niya at ang tatay niya na ang pinakamalapit niya ng kadugo. Iba rin talaga ang mga oportunidad na maibibigay sa kanya kung tatay niya ang magpapaaral sa kanya.
Pero apat na buwan na siya sa Maynila at sa mansion ng mga Lee ay hindi pa rin siya masanay sa karangyaan ng pamilyang tinitirahan niya.
Tulad ng gabing yon. Ito ang unang sabak ni Mark sa totoong party ng mga mayayaman. Sa garden lang ng mansyon nila ang venue at sabi ni Jeno ay intimate gathering lang ng family and friends pero parang eksena sa pelikula ang ayos ng lugar at lahat ng bisita ay ayos na ayos ng itsura sa suot nilang gowns and suits nila. First time magsuot ni Mark ng suit at necktie na pinasadya pa talaga ito para sa kanya para lang sa birthday ng kapatid niya.
Hindi naman sikreto ang existence ni Mark. Alam ng lahat na may anak sa labas ang tatay niya at kinikilala din na siya ang panganay na anak. Kaya hindi na eskandaloso ang pagpunta niya sa party na yun. Pero dahil karamihan sa kanila ay ngayon lang siya nakita in person, di mapigilan ang maraming atensyon na nakatuon sa kanya.
Pagkatapos makihalubilo ni Mark sa iilang taong nagpakilala na mga kamag-anak niya, napagpasiyahan niyang tumabi na muna sa isang sulok. It’s Jeno’s party anyway, not his.
Wala pang limang minutong nakaupong mag-isa si Mark ng may lumapit sa kanya.
“You must be Mark.”
Inangat ni Mark ang ulo niya para makita ang nagsalita at nagulat siya ng makita na isang babae na siguro ay kasing-edad niya ang lumapit sa kanya.
Medyo kulot na hanggang balikat ang buhok nito at nakangiti ito sa kaniya. She looked really elegant and beautiful. Parang artista.
“Ah! You probably don’t know me yet. I’m Haechan Gonzales, Jeno’s best friend.”
Napakunot ng noo si Mark, not expecting that introduction. Wala naman nakukwento sa kanya si Jeno na kaibigang babae.
“Oh! You probably met Jaemin na pala. Fine, I’m the other best friend,” Haechan says, laughing.
“Nakasama ko si Jaemin maglaro ng basketball last week,” kwento ni Mark.
“Yeah, nabanggit nga nila. I’m really close to Jeno and Jaemin. Hindi ako nakasama nun because I had piano lessons. Plus I’m not interested in basketball anyway.”
“I’m sorry if hindi ko maalala if nabanggit ka na ni Jeno sa akin.”
“That’s fine,” sagot ni Haechan. “You and Jeno have a lot of catching up to do. Talking about his friends is probably the least of his priorities. Pero lagi ka niyang kinukwento sa amin even before. He really wanted to meet you.”
“Napakabait ni Jen sa akin. He made me feel welcome to his family.”
“It’s your family too,” Haechan says sincerely. “Maswerte kayong magkapatid na mabait ang pamilya niyo. Not every family is like yours.”
There was a hint of sadness in Haechan’s eyes but she shook her head and laughed it off. Mark felt the need to change the topic.
“So, if hindi basketball ang interest mo... what do you like doing?
This time, Haechan’s smile got even brighter.
“I sing,” she says excitedly. “You should hear me sing.”
And for the next 15 years of his life, wala ng ginawa si Mark but to listen to Haechan sing.
Fifteen years later
“Nakatingin ka na naman sa billboard niya,” bungad ni Jeno kay Mark na siyang kinagulat naman ng mas nakakatanda.
Inabot niya na mabilis ang remote sa table niya para isara ang blinds sa opisina niya.
Tinawanan lang siya ng malakas ng kapatid niya.
“Nahiya ka pa, Kuya. Sanay na ako sayo,” dagdag pa nito.
“Wag ka ngang maingay Jeno,” sagot ni Mark. “Marinig ka sa labas baka magkaron na naman sila ng bagong pagchichismisan.”
“They won’t see naman anong tinitignan mo from there e,” sagot ni Jeno. “Marami naman ang billboards dyan. Pero alam ko isa lang talaga ang tinitignan mo. Tuwang-tuwa ka pa nung nilagay yan sakto sa view ng opisina mo.”
And Jeno was telling the truth. Hindi naman niya sinadya pero sakto talaga sa opisina ng COO ang mga billboards sa EDSA. Kasama na dito ang malaking billboard ni Haechan for a clothing line.
“Too bad they are probably going to take that down soon,” Jeno says. “Hindi na daw nag-renew si Haech sa brand na yan so baka mapalitan na ang model.”
“Really? Bakit naman?” tanong ni Mark. Hindi na siya nagpakipot pa from asking more updates about Haechan sa kapatid niya. Sanay na rin naman si Jeno sa kaniya. For 15 years, Jeno has watched his older brother pine for his best friend. Puro pining lang ginawa ni Mark. Hindi siya nagpilit or nagpalakad sa kapatid. Hindi niya inattempt ligawan si Haechan or magparamdam man lang na may gusto ito sa kaniya. For 15 years, Mark and Haechan remained friends, never more than anything but that. Kay Jeno pa rin siya madalas sumagap ng balita tungkol sa dalaga.
“Well, she’s getting older na daw and the brand is catering to a younger market. Hindi na bagay sa age and image niya yung clothing line. Plus, I think she got an offer from a bigger brand.”
“She still looks young,” sagot ni Mark, not looking at his brother. Nakatuon na ang pansin niya sa mga papel na binabasa niya. “But anything will suit her naman. She deserves a more luxurious brand, to be honest.”
Jeno laughs so loud na napatingin ulit sa kanya ang kuya niya.
“What? You don’t agree with me?”
“It’s not that, Kuya. It’s just… I find it amazing that you can be reading through office documents so seriously and yet still express explicitly how much you like Haechan. It’s amazing how much she is a part of your consciousness. It’s still a pity you never told her how much you like her.”
This made Mark scrunch his nose in annoyance. His brother didn’t have to point that out to him.
“I was just appreciating her looks, Jen. Stating a fact, kumbaga. I didn’t say I like her. I don’t like her like that anymore.”
Jeno sighs and moves closer to his brother’s desk. “You can lie to the whole world about your feelings for Haechan, Kuya. But you can never lie to me.”
Mark just shakes his head and says, “Bakit ka nga ba nandito? Don’t you have work to do?”
At the age of 29, Mark is now the Chief Operating Officer of the Lee Properties Group. Though it's a position that he could have through birthright, he earned the post through his stellar academic and work credentials and climbing through the company’s promotion ladder steadily.
Jeno, on the other hand, manages a food and non-food retail company from his mother’s family’s side since unica hija din ang nanay niya at panganay na apo sa side nila si Jeno. The two companies are actually currently going through merging right now, a business and family decision that was decided will be for their companies’ best interests, kaya busy talaga ang magkapatid and were working together closely for the first time.
“Pumunta lang ako dito to ask anong plans mo for your 30th birthday,” Jeno asks. “It’s in four days and hindi ka pa rin nagsasabi either kina dad or sa amin ng plans mo.”
Napatingin sa desk calendar niya si Mark. Birthday na nga pala niya sa Sabado. Di niya rin namalayan dahil masyado silang abala the past weeks.
“Nakalimutan ko,” sagot ni Mark. “Kaya pala tinanong ako ni Tita anong gusto kong menu for dinner. Akala ko it’s the usual family dinner lang.”
“Anong sinagot mo?”
“I told her I was craving for her lemon butter chicken.”
“Sus. Kaya ka paborito ni Mommy. Lagi mong pinupuri ang luto niya,” sagot ni Jeno.
“Masarap naman kase talaga luto ng mama mo. Masyado ka lang pihikan na sa pagkain kase chef ang boyfriend mo.”
“Speaking of Jaemin… since wala ka pang plans, sila na ang gumawa ng plano for you. Gusto nilang mag-beach sana sa weekend for your birthday. Game ka ba? Sabihin natin kina Mommy na sa Friday na tayo mag-family dinner tapos sa bahay na lang tayo manggaling to Batangas?”
“Sinong mga kasama?”
“Well si Jaemin and Yangyang talaga ang may gusto. Pero nabanggit ko na din kina Kuya Jungwoo and Kuya Jaehyun. Syempre automatic na si Renjun since andun si Yangyang. Chenle is still out of the country, pero Jisung and Haechan try daw nila humabol.”
Biglang bumilis ang tibok ng puso ni Mark ng marinig ang pangalan ni Haechan. But he’s used to it now, hindi na siya nagugulat.
“Hindi busy si Haechan?”
Tumawa ulit ng malakas ang nakababatang kapatid.
“I literally said all our friends’ names pero isa lang talaga ang tumatak sayo. She’s probably the least busiest pa out of all of them.”
“Well, siya din ang least na nakakausap ko sa kanila so I think my question is valid, Jeno.”
“Hay naku. Ayaw magpatalo. Sige na. Pero sabi niya she will try to come. I know you can see her whining sa group chat natin na gusto niya ng magbakasyon.”
Mark sees her chats. It’s a group chat composed of seven friends who went to the same high school. They were originally Jeno’s friends pero inampon na nila si Mark sa grupo nila when he transferred to their school. Nahirapan mag-adjust nung una si Mark since malayong-malayo ang kultura ng private international school sa kinasanayan niyang public school sa probinsya. It’s not until he went to college that he made friends on his own, Jaehyun and Jungwoo. But aside from the few friends he grew up with sa probinsya that he kept in touch with, he considers the six people in that group chat among his truest friends -- people who grew up with him and helped him in the most difficult times of his life.
Pero madalang siyang magreply sa group chat na yun, content on reading their messages and listening to Haechan’s voice notes that she sends every now and then. Hindi rin naman ganun ka-active yung group chat na yun since may kanya-kanya silang closer circle.
“Sige. San tayo sa weekend?”
“Gusto nila ng malapit lang since saglit lang tayo and they know we are both busy. I guess dun na lang tayo sa atin? Para hindi madaming tao and may magaasikaso na sa atin.”
“That’s great. Maganda din makapagunwind nga since mas masakit sa ulo yung next phase ng merge natin.”
“Tama Kuya. You need to take a break too. Plus, minsan ka lang mag-thirty. Tumatanda ka na,” Jeno said.
“I’m a year older than you,” sagot ni Mark.
“And yet you are still single.”
“Wag mo na nga problemahin ang lovelife ko. Problemahin mo na lang anong ireregalo mo sa akin.”
“Alam ko na kaya! Pero next week ko na ibibigay after your birthday,” sagot ni Jeno, sabay lakad palabas ng opisina ni Mark. “See you sa Friday, Kuya.”
Tumango lang si Mark at lumabas na ang kapatid niya. He arranged the papers on his table and checked them again to see if tama ang mga pinirmihan niya. After a few hours, he swiveled his chair at itinaas ulit ang blinds ng opisina niya.
The sun is almost setting and binuksan na ang ilaw sa mga billboards sa EDSA. He took one last look at the sight he got so used to looking at for a year now. Naka-tatlong palit din ng photos ang endorsement na ito ni Haechan. And for Mark, she looked radiant every single time.
He closed his blinds again and messaged his secretary to have his car prepared.
Everything moves. Everything changes. But Mark’s heart stayed devoted to one person for more than a decade.
*
Mark wasn’t expecting a text from Haechan that day.
“Kuya Mark, alam mo ba pano pumunta sa address na ito?”
“Medyo malapit lang yan. Anong gagawin mo dyan?” mabilis na reply ni Mark.
“May open audition kase sila. I received an invite to audition. Kaya naman siguro if I ride a cab?”
This made Mark worry. Hindi naman sanay magcommute si Haechan.
“Walang magdadrive for you?”
“Tatakas lang kase ako. Please don’t tell my mom.”
Mark calls Haechan after he read her last reply. Twice niya tinawagan kase hindi siya agad sinagot.
“Pagagalitan mo ba ako, Kuya?”
“No, Haechan. Nasa school ka ba? I’ll pick you up na lang tapos hatid kita dun.”
“Kuya, okay lang. I don’t want to be a bother.”
“No, it’s okay. Wala naman ako ginagawa,” sagot ni Mark. Ramdam niya na nakatingin sa kanya ang mga kaibigan niya na kasama niya. Nasa kalagitnaan sila ng pagrereview. Si Mark pa ang nag-book ng study room nila sa library.
“Thank you, Kuya! Sige, I'll wait for you here. Thanks talaga.”
Pagkababa ng phone ay mabilis na inayos ni Mark ang mga gamit nya.
“Aalis ka nga?” tanong ni Jungwoo.
“Yeah. Tonight na lang ako mag-review sa bahay. Importante lang,” sagot ni Mark.
“Hayaan mo na, dude. Si Haechan yan, top priority. Four years mo ng kaibigan si Mark di ka pa rin sanay,” asar ni Jaehyun.
“Sabagay. Simula first year tayo hanggang ngayon na graduating na tayo, he’s still whipped for Haechan. Di nya tuloy pinapansin yung ibang nagkakagusto sa kanya.”
“Di ba nga, siya daw ang leading cause ng lahat ng broken hearts sa College of Communications.”
Mark can’t even defend himself. He shook his at nagpaalam na sa mga kaibigan.
Sinundo niya si Haechan at hinatid sa venue ng open audition. Hinintay na din niya matapos para makasiguro na makakauwi safely ang kaibigan niya. At dahil medyo may pila, bumili na lang din muna ng tubig si Mark para kay Haechan.
A good two hours later, natapos na si Haechan. She was smiling happily as she bounced to Mark.
“How was it?” tanong ng nakakatanda.
“They said I’m not the one they are looking for now but they said they love my voice and I have potential,” sagot ni Haechan.
“Huh? Good ba yun or bad?”
“I don’t know. I’m just happy I got to sing and they said I have talent.”
“But you are really talented, Haech. Everyone needs to hear you sing.”
“Someday, Mark. For now, okay na yung ganito at least I’m gaining experience ma-try mga ganito. Hindi ko din alam hanggang kelan ako makakatakas kina Mommy.”
Wala ng nasagot si Mark because that’s the truth. They all have roles to play in their families already and, most likely, Haechan’s parents will have the last to say in what she will do in the future.
“If you need help, you’ll always have me, okay?” Mark says.
“I’ll remember that, Mark. Thank you for today.”
*
Halos apat na taon na rin since Mark moved out of their family mansion but everything still feels very familiar to him every time he comes home.
Home.
Sa totoo lang, hindi naisip ni Mark that he will ever feel at home dito. He wasn’t born and raised in this mansion. May isip na siya nung dumating siya dito. He was ready to be rejected back then, had zero expectations that he will have a family again after his mom died. But the Lees treated him well, like a member of the family from the start.
The mansion is so big but it’s filled with memories too -- of him and Jeno, of them with their dad, of him and Jeno’s mom bonding over their common love for music, of his grandparents often checking up on him, of their friends coming over often to study or hang out or have sleepovers.
Even when he studied in New York for his Masters Degree, he would still come home every vacation to be with his family. Factor din siguro na nung umalis siya to US was when his brother went through a rebellious stage so umuuwi talaga siya for Jeno and to be Jeno’s support.
It’s only recently that he moved to his own condo to be nearer sa work after he got appointed as COO. But he and Jeno still spend many weekends at their family home kahit hindi sila sabihan ng mga magulang nila.
His grandparents both passed away already so the house feels even bigger now.
“Hinihintay ko na lang kayong magkapamilya ni Jeno para mabigay ko na sa inyo to. Kayo ng bahala pano nyo paghahatian,” his dad mentions again during dinner that night. Malakas pa ang dad niya pero excited na itong mag-retire. Jeno’s mother has mentioned repeatedly too na gusto niya ng mag-settle somewhere else, away from the city.
“Kuya can have it na. This house is too big din for me and mas may chance magkaanak si Kuya kesa sa akin,” Jeno says.
“You and Jaemin can always adopt,” sagot ni Mark. “At least you have someone. I don’t even have anyone to consider.”
Jeno and Jaemin coming out and going public with their relationship was probably the biggest news in the country’s rich and powerful circle in the last decade.
Two of the best looking and richest bachelors in the country ending up together was something that is expected to be talked about.
It was a big deal in their family too because Jeno struggled for a while with his sexuality -- and falling in love with his best friend -- before he was able to admit to himself and to his family what he really is and who he really wants. He went through a rebellious phase and shunned himself for months. It was Jaemin too who helped him through it and together they bravely faced their families. The Lees were understanding, though Mark felt more pressure back then since he would really need to produce an heir for them. The Antonios were a bit more unaccepting, and their disappointment with Jaemin more pronounced. But no one was ostracized and now couple goals na lang ang tingin nila kay Jeno and Jaemin.
“You have someone you consider, Kuya,” sagot ni Jeno.
Napatingin ang dalawang matanda kay Mark.
“May nililigawan na ba si Mark? Bakit wala kayong kinukwento?” tanong ng mommy ni Jeno.
“Wala po, Tita. Jeno’s just bluffing.”
“Meron naman talaga, Mommy. But it’s someone he considers untouchable.”
“Pano naman naging untouchable? You’re a good catch naman, Mark. I don’t think any man or woman in the country would reject you,” sabi ng dad niya.
“Wala talaga, Dad. I used to like someone but she doesn’t like me so I’ve moved on na. Ewan ko dito kay Jeno, nakaimbento ng kwento.”
Tumawa lang si Jeno. “Whatever you say, Kuya.”
*
Mark always felt like an older brother to Jeno because from the very first time they met, Jeno had always looked up to him.
They saw each other only a few times while growing up and never spent more than a day together.
Pero halos hindi sila mapaghiwalay buong araw dahil todo dikit talaga si Jeno sa kuya niya. May pagka makulit ito at laging maraming kwento.
And Mark enjoyed being a big brother to him.
When they started living together, si Jeno naman ang naging mas maalaga kay Mark. Tinulungan niya ang kapatid na mag-adjust at paano makisalamuha sa mga tao sa paligid nila. Jeno was protective of Mark because Mark had no idea of the amount of people ready to take advantage of him in his new world.
They’ve been good brothers to each other. Kaya hindi sinusukuan ni Mark si Jeno ngayon. Jeno’s been aloof for months na. His mom told Mark na tumigil ito from going to school, kahit graduating na sya. He doesn’t talk to his friends and he’s always drinking inside his room or going out with different crowds, the kind of people Mark doesn't really approve off.
Mark is scared and worried. Kaya kahit busy sya sa school, he goes back to the Philippines every break he gets to try to talk to Jeno. Pumipirmi lang kase daw siya sa bahay pag umuuwi ang kuya niya. He calls regularly too pero tipid talaga siya kausapin ng kapatid pag sa phone.
Mark had a week of winter break this time and he almost, almost, didn’t go home this time.
And the reason is sitting in front of him now in their living room.
“Kumusta na si Jen?” Haechan asks.
“The usual. Well, his new usual. Sabay kami kumakain and we make small talk but he doesn’t really say anything and parang laging mainit ang ulo.”
“He’s not talking to Jaemin na naman nga daw e. Hindi ko talaga alam what’s happening. I feel so guilty for being so busy.”
“No, don’t worry Haech. Jeno’s getting better. I’ll do my best to help him.”
Tumango lang si Haechan, looking far away towards the direction of Jeno’s room kung saan pinagsarahan nya ng pinto ang kaibigan kani-kanina lang.
“Congrats pala,” Mark starts. “I saw your new music video. And sa engagement mo din. Congrats sainyo ni Sungchan.”
“Oh.”
Walang nagsalita sa kanila until Haechan spoke again.
“Thanks, Mark. You know it’s an engagement arranged by our parents right?”
Mark nods and tries to hide his clenched fist.
“Still. Maswerte si Sungchan sa iyo. Di ko siya masyado kilala but I hope he supports your dream, at the very least.”
“It’s not his to decide anyway,” Haechan says.
An awkward silence falls upon them. Minutes later, umalis na din si Haechan.
Mark remained in his seat until Jeno sat next to him.
“Is it worth it, Kuya? Is it worth it to love someone you can never have?”
Napakunot ng noo si Mark sa tanong ni Jeno, not expecting it.
“I don’t know if I’m doing the right thing here loving her, Jen. It’s just how I feel. I can’t change it. I can’t stop it. So I just accepted it and lived with it.”
“Kuya. Ang pathetic mo. Pero I’m just the same. We aren’t being martyrs here, we are just cowards.”
“I don’t know what you are talking about, Jen. Pero tama ka… I am pathetic and a coward. And it’s going to stay that way because it’s my choice. I fell in love with someone I’ll never be brave enough to claim. But it doesn’t have to be the same for you. Di ko alam anong pinagdadaanan mo exactly but your choice is yours alone.”
Tahimik lang si Jeno. Then he cried. Ngayon na lang ulit nakita ni Mark na umiyak na hagulgol ang kapatid niya.
“Kuya, I can’t stop. I want to stop at ibalik ang dati but I can’t. I want to ignore what I feel and move on pero hindi ko din magawa. I can’t be like you, Kuya. It hurts so much.”
Hinayaan lang ni Mark na umiyak ang kapatid niya. After a few weeks, when Jeno properly came out to him, he finally understood his words. And buti na lang he and his brother are not the same.
Because Jeno got brave and confessed. And luckily, his feelings were not unrequited.
*
The two brothers slept in their own childhood bedrooms na lang since sabay naman silang babyahe the next day.
At 5 in the morning, Mark woke up to see birthday greetings from his friends and some co-workers.
He replies a generic thank you to most of them. Hinuli niyang basahin message ni Haechan since he was expecting it to be a voice note.
It’s been a tradition since his 15th birthday, the first birthday he had after meeting Haechan. The younger one would always sing for him, it can be a short song or a full cover, on his birthdays. Sa mga taon na malayo sila sa isa’t isa, Haechan would send it through a voice note. There was one year na may concert si Haechan sa Los Angeles on Mark’s birthday and he attended so she dedicated a song for him sa concert set niya. It’s their thing -- songs and music.
This year though, walang voice note from Haechan.
“Happy Birthday, Kuya Mark. See you later. I’ll try my best to make it today para sakto sa birthday mo. Can you bring your guitar?”
Mark’s heart raced reading Haechan’s message. It’s been a long time since he played the guitar for her. Napatingin siya sa kwarto niya at buti nalang iniwan niya dito yung first ever guitar niya. He had his newest ones sa condo niya but kept a few ones here.
Kinuha niya ang gitara niya and it’s the one that Haechan painted on many years ago. Perfect.
“Thanks, Haech. Sure I’ll bring my guitar. See you later but please don’t rush if hindi kaya talaga. Stay safe and ingat sa byahe.”
He didn’t receive a reply anymore dahil tulog pa nga siguro si Haechan.
*
When Mark first met Haechan, hindi niya inexpect that she would be a permanent fixture in his life. Medyo nagduda kase siya nung sinabi ni Haechan na bestfriend siya ni Jeno. Pero totoo pala dahil madalas na nasa bahay ng mga Lee si Haechan kasama ang iba pang mga kaibigan nila.
“We all grew up together. Same school, same crowd. She’s one of the few nice kids kaya dumikit kami ni Jaem sa kanya. Haech is like the younger sister I never had kahit ka-edad ko naman siya,” paliwanag sa kanya ni Jeno months ago.
But the problem is it’s so hard for Mark to see Haechan as a sister.
Na-love at second sight ata siya sa dalaga. When he saw her the first time na naka-casual t-shirt and shorts lang at hindi ayos na ayos unlike sa party, she was even more beautiful. Kalog din siya kausap at matalino. Two months pa lang silang magkakilala at dalawang buwan na ding may crush si Mark sa kanya.
It got worse when he heard her sing.
“Kuya Mark, please play for me naman.”
It was a simple request from Haechan after she saw him with his guitar one day.
So Mark strummed a song he’s familiar with. He was surprised when Haechan sang along.
“Cause if you like the way you look that much
Oh, baby, you should go and love yourself
And if you think that I'm still holdin' on to somethin'
You should go and love yourself”
“You’re good, Kuya Mark,” nakangiting sabi ni Haechan.
Halos di na makapagsalita si Mark.
“Ang ganda ng boses mo,” mahinang sagot niya.
“Thank you! Kaya dapat tutugtog ka lagi whenever I ask okay?” request ni Haechan.
Tumango ng mabilis si Mark. “Okay,” sagot niya.
*
Mark is really happy to be with his friends. Swerte talaga sya because he met good people. It’s easy to be a snob and mayabang dahil lahat sila from affluent families. But even if they grew up sheltered, they sincerely cared for each other. Kahit na they are all busy with their careers and responsibilities, they make time for each other.
Pero kahit anong distract sa kanya ng mga kwento ng kaibigan nya, he kept looking at his phone waiting for a message from Haechan.
Tinatawanan lang siya ng kapatid niya pag nahuhuli siya pero nagpromise ito na di siya aasarin today dahil birthday niya.
It was close to dinner time ng dumating ang kotse ni Jisung together with his girlfriend Yuna and of course, Haechan.
Sakto naman na nagluluto by the beach kaya dun na dumiretso ang tatlo.
Unang nilapitan ni Haechan si Mark.
“Happy birthday ulit, Mark,” nakangiting bati nito sa binata.
Hindi mapigilan ni Mark ang paglaki ng ngiti nya. Sa loob-loob niya, imposible talaga na hindi alam ni Haechan ang effect niya sa kanya. He feels so transparent, like he is carrying a neon sign ng “I LOVE YOU” tuwing malapit sa kanya si Haechan.
“Thank you. You made it,” sagot ni Mark. “Kumusta ang byahe?”
“Okay naman. Safe naman magmaneho si Ji. Plus kasama si Yuna so extra careful sya. But I probably need another ride pauwi kase balak ata nung dalawa magextend ng bakasyon sa Tagaytay after dito.”
“I’ll give you a ride home,” offer ni Mark. “Si Jeno lang kasabay ko papunta dito since galing kami sa bahay but he’s going to ride with Jaemin na pabalik.”
“Ayan! Tamang-tama. Para hindi ka din ma-lonely sa byahe,” sagot ni Haechan. “By the way, did you bring your guitar?”
“Yes, nasa loob.”
“Later na lang after dinner. I missed singing with you,” sagot ni Haechan.
Back when they were young, Mark often played the guitar while Haechan sang. They would even record their songs and sometimes perform in front of their families and friends. Even after Haechan made singing her career, she would still request Mark to play for her tuwing magkikita sila. Kaya updated din si Mark sa mga bagong kanta and continuously nag-aaral ng chords. It’s his hobby but he also wants to be ready in case may irequest na song si Haechan.
After dinner, napagpasyahan nilang magkakaibigan na magstay na lang sa may beach. May maliit na bonfire sila at mga alak and snacks.
Nilabas din ni Mark ang gitara nya and played some songs. Nagkantahan sila, nagkantyawan, nagpalitan ng mga updates sa buhay.
“Hindi mo ba ako kakantahan?” matapang na request ni Mark kay Haechan na nakaupo sa tabi nya. “I’m still waiting for your birthday gift.”
“Isang MaHae naman dyan. We missed this combination,” malakas na sabi Yangyang from across them.
“What song do you want to sing?” Mark asks, lightly strumming.
Haechan scrolls on her phone and shows the song to Mark. He nods, knowing the chords to this one.
I met you in the dark
You lit me up
You made me feel as though
I was enough
For a minute, everyone around them disappeared. It’s just him and Haechan, and their songs. Mark thinks he can do this again -- spend another 15 years in love with her.
I'm gonna love you 'til
My lungs give out
I promise 'til death we part like in our vows
So I wrote this song for you, now everybody knows
That it's just you and me 'til we're grey and old
Just say you won't let go
Just say you won't let go
Just say you won't let go
Oh, just say you won't let go
Mark strums the last chords and his sight is fixed on Haechan. She’s glowing, smiling sincerely towards him.
“You sound amazing, babe,” bati ni Renjun, breaking the way Mark and Haechan are staring intensely at each other. “Please sing sa wedding namin. Please.”
“Wedding?” the group asked in unison.
“Ooops,” Renjun says, leaning towards her boyfriend. “I forgot to say Yangie proposed last week. We are getting married!” she exclaimed.
The group went into simultaneous cheers. They approached the couple and congratulated them. Haechan promised to sing at their wedding.
While their friends are busy with Renjun and Yangyang, Haechan sneaks to the side and grabs Mark’s left hand and gives it a squeeze. Nagulat si Mark and looked at Haechan, confused but happy.
“Happy Birthday again, Kuya,” she says once more.
“You only call me kuya when you need something,” Mark says, teasing.
Haechan laughs. “You know me well. I actually need something from you.”
“May problema ba?” Mark asks seriously.
Haechan shakes her head. “It’s a happy problem. I’ll tell you tomorrow pag pauwi tayo?”
“Okay, sige. You know I’ll do anything for you, right?” Mark says.
“Alam ko. If there’s one person I can trust here not to break his promises, that would be you,” Haechan says. “Talk to you tom,” she adds before rejoining their friends.
“Only with you, Haechan,” Mark murmurs to himself. “Only with you.”
*
Mark never contacts Haechan first. It’s always her who texts or calls first. Mark’s reason is because he’s too whipped for her already and natatakot siya na masanay communicating to her regularly at maging clingy siya sa kanya.
But when he received Jeno’s message a few minutes ago, hindi niya napigilan ang sarili. He slipped out of his class and immediately called her.
Haechan picked up after three rings.
“Kuya Mark,” sagot nito, crying.
“Are you okay? How can I help?”
Lalong lumakas pa ang iyak ni Haechan sa kabilang linya.
“I don’t know why I’m crying when I expected this already,” hikbi ni Haechan. “They could’ve done worse, to be honest. I just hate that I was... proven right.”
“Haech…”
“My family doesn’t love me, Kuya. I grew up knowing that. Wala naman talaga akong value sa pamilya na ito and I’m just an asset to them. Now I ruined their plans and led to business losses so cutting me off is very easy na to them.”
“Haech… don’t say that…”
“You know I’m right, Kuya. But it still hurts. It hurts so much.”
“May kasama ka ba?” tanong ni Mark. “Do you… do you need me to fly back home? I want to be there for you.”
Haechan was silent on the phone at kinabahan talaga si Mark. He’s thinking if he overstepped the line. But he really wants to help Haechan, even just as a friend.
“You’re the best talaga, Kuya. You and Jeno and our friends are the only family I need.”
“Wait for me. I can catch a plane tomorrow I think.”
And Mark really would, kahit na graduating na siya at may malaking exam siya the next day. If Haechan asks, he would leave everything for her.
“No need na, Kuya. I’ll be doing a country tour din naman dito this week. I’ll be busy din.”
Mark’s heart clenches. He wants to be there for her. He wants to be sure she’ll be okay. But Haechan doesn’t need him. She has never needed him because she’s strong and resilient on her own. And that’s what he loves about her too.
“I’ll just sing all my heartaches away.”
“Okay. If you need anything… anything… I’m just a phone call away, okay?”
*
“You want to live with me?” Mark asks for the third time during their meal, not completely believing he heard it right when Haechan said it the first time.
“Ayaw mo ba? Like I said, you can say no,” Haechan says habang tuloy-tuloy lang siya sa pagkain na akala mo walang shocking news na sinabi just a few minutes to go. Good thing nasa kainan na sila and it’s just the two of them when Haechan mentioned this favor kundi baka napahiya talaga si Mark sa overreaction nya.
“Hindi sa ayaw ko, pero I don’t understand. If you need a place to stay pwede naman kita bigyan ng sariling condo mo. Or sa mansion ka muna, I’m sure my parents would love to have you. Where are you even staying now? May problema ba sa dating condo mo?”
Haechan has been living on her own for years now, ever since itakwil sya ng magulang nya for breaking up an arranged marriage. Hindi tanggap ang mga sumusuway na mga anak sa angkan ng mga Gonzales.
“Galante mo talaga, Kuya. Bigay agad ng condo?” natatawang tanong ni Haechan.
“You only call me Kuya when you are in trouble. Ano bang nangyari, Haech? I thought may living arrangement naman sa contract mo with your label. Hindi ba maayos? I can help you fix it.”
“Walang problema sa place ko now. Well, meron. Pero yun nga ang ineexplain ko sayo. I’m writing songs for my latest album and I’m stumped. I need a companion. Gusto ko ng kasama sa bahay for inspiration.”
“And you thought of me?”
“Well, tatlo lang tayong single sa barkada. Do you want me to live with Chenle?”
“No,” mabilis na sagot ni Mark na ikinagulat ni Haechan.
“Hindi ko rin naman naisip yan, don’t worry. Mas madalas din kase na wala sa bansa si Le so walang sense. Plus alam ko mas maayos kang kasama sa bahay.”
“You know I’m not going to say no when you ask for favors but are you really okay with living with me? Won’t you feel uncomfortable?”
“Hey, Mark. If it’s with you, I’m okay with it. It’s my idea pa nga di ba?”
But the thing is, for Mark it’s not really okay. Will he survive living under the same roof with the love of his life? Guess wala na ngang magmomove on.
*
New York is cold during winter. Unfortunately, Mark’s first months in New York was during winter.
He scrolls through the phone and sees the photos they took during Kuya Johnny’s photos. Haechan looked very pretty in her pale yellow gown. Mark had a short recording too of Haechan singing for her brother at his wedding. Looking at the photos and videos relieved Mark of the homesickness he was feeling.
Just then, he receives a text message from Haechan.
“Kuya Mark, I got it!” the message says shortly.
Mark replies fast.
“What is it?”
“Kuya Mark, I signed with a label. I’m going to be a singer.”
“Congrats Haech! You deserve it! The world deserves to hear you sing!”
“You’ll listen to my songs ah? Promise me.”
“Haechan Gonzales, I am your first fan right? I will always be your fan.”
*
Mark was deep in his thoughts na hindi nya narinig kumatok si Jeno.
“You okay, Kuya?” his brother asks.
Napatingin si Mark sa kapatid and sighed.
“Haechan asked for a favor,” Mark begins. “She asked to live with me.”
“What? Bakit daw? Is she in trouble?” gulat na tanong ni Jeno.
“Hindi naman daw. Sabi nya it’s to help her write songs. Hindi ko din maintindihan.”
“So ano to? You’re her muse?”
“Muse? I don’t think so. It’s convenient lang ata. Gusto nya lang may kasama sa bahay kase nahihirapan daw sya magisip alone.”
“Kuya… this is your chance.”
“What are you talking about, Jen?”
“This is your chance. Confess na. Tell her you love her. Win her heart.”
“Jeno, I can’t do that. Kaibigan natin si Haechan. I don’t want to lose her if she rejects me. And she will reject me.”
“Hindi mo malalaman if you don’t try, kuya. Besides, you said yes na so pano ka. Araw-araw kayo magkikita. Kaya mo ba?”
“That’s my problem nga. Jeno, what should I do?”
Natahimik si Jeno at inabot ang dalang regalo ka Mark. “Here,” he says.
Mark opens the box and inside is a picture frame with a photo of Mark and Haechan from the weekend. Mark was playing the guitar, staring lovingly at Haechan.
“Jaemin took this photo and I had it printed. Iniisip ko pwede na to pamalit sa billboard mo pag nawala na. Kuya, kitang-kita sa mukha mo gano mo pa rin sya kamahal. Even without expecting anything in return, maybe it’s time to give yourself a chance to love her openly.”
Lalong gumulo ang isip ni Mark. For now, he’s just going to have to try to survive each day seeing Haechan and controlling his feelings.
*
“Do you miss your mom?”
Hindi napansin ni Mark na nilapitan siya ni Haechan. It’s his first summer vacation with his brother and his new friends. He’s 16 now pero naninibago pa rin siya. But the beach trip helped because the sea is a familiar place to Mark. After all, lumaki siya malapit sa dagat.
Ngayon nakaupo lang siya sa tabing-dagat, nakatingin sa mga bituin. Maybe it’s coincidence or maybe Haechan can read him, but he was indeed thinking about his mom.
“Minsan. Mas miss ko lang siya today,” Mark answers honestly. “Madalas niya akong ipasyal sa may dagat nung bata ako since malapit lang sa amin. Siya din nagturo sa akin lumangoy.”
“She must have been an amazing woman. I wish I could’ve met her.”
Napatango lang si Mark. “Magugustuhan ka ni Nanay, for sure. Mahilig din siyang kumanta kaya nag-aral ako maggitara para sa kanya.”
“I owe your mom a lot pala. I get encouraged to sing whenever you play the guitar for me. Plus, you take good care of us lagi pa and I think it’s because of her influence in raising you.”
Napatawa si Mark. “Ako ba? Wala naman akong ginagawa. Madalas kaya na umaasa ako sainyo.”
“Kuya, you probably don’t see it because you are innately good. But to us who grew up with absent parents and opportunist people around, having nice and genuine people in our lives is a rarity.”
“Hindi ko naisip yan.”
“Do you regret? Coming here?” Haechan asks.
“Hindi ko na iniisip yan kase hindi ko na mababago ang mga nangyari. I’m okay naman kung nasaan ako ngayon. I can be happy here. But I miss my mom.” sagot ni Mark.
“And it’s okay to always miss her too,” sagot ni Haechan.
Hindi napigilan ni Mark ang pagtulo ng luha niya. Nilapitan siya ni Haechan at niyakap.
“She’s proud of you, Kuya. And I’m sure all she wants is for you to live a happy life.”
Hindi napigilan ni Mark na yakapin din si Haechan. It’s been a while since he cried. Minsan naiisip nya, he didn’t properly mourn for his mother kase ang daming nangyari sa buhay niya after she died. But it’s okay. He doesn’t have to prolong mourning. He’s going to live constantly thinking of her anyway.
*
Living with Haechan, as Mark expected, turned out to be a dream come true.
Haechan moved the next weekend after Mark’s birthday. Buti na lang talaga at two bedroom ang condo niya and laging ready ang second bedroom for guests. May days na sobrang busy si Mark sa work so he gets home late pero they make it a point to have breakfast and dinner together.
Haechan is busy too, a celebrity’s schedule can have odd hours. But most of her time is spent writing songs and sometimes she would play for Mark sa keyboard na dala nito or make Mark play the chords sa guitar nya.
On Fridays, they dine out at the mall attached sa condo nya and walk around. During weekends they laze around lang sa condo o kaya they drive around or visit their friends together.
It’s been more than a month and, unfortunately, nasasanay na si Mark. He’s been in love with her for 15 years but the past month has been the most intense of his feelings.
Waking up to her preparing breakfast and saying good night to her in person before he sleeps -- it gives him hope.
Tonight, they were in a small cafe just across the mall na paboritong puntahan ni Haechan. The cafe was playing Taylor Swift’s Lover.
“We danced to this song during Kuya Johnny’s wedding right?”
Mark nods before sipping his drink. He remembers that night. That was the last time he and Haechan danced. She was so beautiful in the pale yellow gown she wore for the wedding’s reception. Her hair was long at that time too, first time niyang magpahaba ng buhok and she looked really pretty.
“Inaasar pa ako ni Jeno nun. Isayaw daw kita kase aalis ka na. Alam niya ata na crush kita.”
Halos mabulunan si Mark sa iniinom nya. Nagulat si Haechan and helped pat Mark’s back. Inabutan nya ng tissue din.
“Are you okay?”
“What did you say?”
“I asked if you are okay?”
“No, before that. Yung kanina about Jeno and the dance.”
“Ah. Na crush kita? I mean, alam mo din naman yun di ba?”
“Wait, no. Baka nagkakamali ka. Baka inaasar ka ni Jeno kase alam nya that I like you.”
“What?”
“I like you. I have always liked you, Haechan.”
This is not the way Mark imagined confessing. Pero di na nya mabawi ang mga salita nya.
“You liked me even then? Akala ko…. Akala ko ngayon lang. I have had a crush on you since we were in high school!”
“Alam mo na gusto kita now?”
“You’re not that subtle naman Mark. Pero two years ago ko lang napansin? Nalaman? Back when you visited me in LA lang.”
“I have liked you since I was 15, Haechan Gonzales. I’ve been in love with you for years.”
“Mark…”
“Do you? Did you really like me? Bakit wala kang sinabi?”
“Everyone had a crush on you in high school. Tapos in college, medyo madalang na tayong nagkita since we got busy. But you always made time for me and helped me sa mga auditions ko, how can I not fall in love with you? But then you had to leave for New York and I got engaged and alam mo na ang daming nangyari.”
Mark nods, understanding what Haechan met. Their lives got swept up in many dramas as they grew older.
Mark left for New York after that wedding. Haechan got signed into a big music label and shot to celebrity stardom. Haechan got engaged then was cast off by her family. Mark started working in their family business. There was no time for feelings and they watched each other from the side lines for years.
“Besides, you did not tell me anything either. Since you were 15? Hindi ko alam.”
“I guess I’m good at hiding my feelings. Or I’m really bad at making you feel you are special to me,” Mark says, regretfully.
“No… it’s just that… you treat everyone nicely. I thought I was just getting some special bonus for being your first friend here. But then you grew distant from me too during college. Akala ko you were dating na and ayaw mo may magselos.”
“No, I didn’t have anyone else. Pero I did try to keep a distance. You introduced a boyfriend once I think and nag-snap ako sa reality that we can’t be together. Plus sobrang pressure ko din nun to do good in school and prove myself.”
“We were young back then too and ang dami nating iniisip sa family, sa future. We are in a better place now right?”
“Is that what you realized during our time in LA?”
“When you showed up at my concert, which was on your birthday, I realized that I am indeed special to you. Then we spent the next few days together before our flights and I realized my feelings for you never changed. That I’d always be a bit in love with you. I told Renjun about this and she said I should tell you instead.”
Napatingin si Haechan sa kamay nilang magkahawak na. Mark rubs her hand to encourage her.
“But it was so hard because you were busy and I was flying everywhere. I didn’t know how to confess, knowing wala naman mangyayari sa atin. If you reject me, I wouldn’t know what to do.”
“What changed your mind?”
“Knowing you like me too. The way you make me feel like I’ll always have a home to go back to, it makes me want to take risks.”
“Haechan, I’m really very happy now. Hindi lang siguro halata kase I wasn’t expecting any of this tonight. Or ever,” Mark starts.
“We don’t have to rush anything. But the past month of us living together, it made me feel greedy. I want you more than I ever did. Do you think… do you want to try to be with me? I promise to do everything to make you happy everyday,” sabi ni Mark, sounding so sincere and hopeful.
Haechan reaches out to touch Mark’s cheeks. “You make me happy na, Mark. You don’t have to do anything more. I do want to be with you. It’s time for us to be selfish na di ba? I am here with you because I am braver now and gusto ko na maging masaya tayo. Be my boyfriend?” she asks.
“I’m yours, love of my life,” Mark whispers and tilts to give Haechan’s palm a light kiss.
*
Of course, the first people they tell are their friends.
Jeno was in disbelief when Haechan said that she always had feelings for Mark.
“I guess I always saw it from my brother’s point of view. Since the start he was very smitten with you. Pero he always insisted na hindi kayo pwede. That you’re untouchable. So ganun na din tingin ko sainyo,” sabi ni Jeno.
Jaemin disagrees, though.
“Tuwing tinatanong ka ng ideal guy mo laging katulad ni Mark sinasagot mo,” he says.
“Sabi ko na you watch my interviews!” Haechan teases.
“Yung parts lang na about sa lovelife mo kase I want tea” Jaemin says, laughing. “At nagpaturo ka pa sa akin ng mga iluluto for breakfast and dinner so malamang mag-iisip ako na may something na.”
“Really, babe?” tanong ni Mark, sounding really flattered.
“I did not magically learn to cook, hun. Nag-effort ako, kahit as kasama lang sa bahay.”
Tumawa si Mark and walked towards Haechan to give her a light kiss sa forehead.
Sabay na nag-gag sound si Jeno and Jaemin. Sumimangot si Mark sa dalawa.
“Tiniis ko ang PDA nyong dalawa for years. Ngayon kayo naman,” he says.
*
Mark and Haechan continued their set-up of living together. Mark wouldn’t have it any other way. But instead of different rooms, they use Mark’s room na lang. Haechan insists. They go through their usual routines, feeling like a long-time married couple instead of a couple that just got together. But they both like the feeling of this.
“Did you know we were supposed to get married?” tanong ni Haechan na ikinagulat ni Mark.
“What? How? Why? Hindi ko alam yan.”
Haechan hums and stretches her legs over Mark’s lap. Umayos ng upo si Mark to accommodate her. They were seated on the sofa, watching Netflix in the background.
“Yeah. An arranged marriage was my dad’s condition so I can pursue singing. They thought about you or Jeno. And I thought, okay sige. I’m surrounded by married couples na ganito ang set-up e. Even Kuya Johnny di ba? At least I get something out of it and if it’s you or Jen I can live with that.”
“Did my dad say no? They never told me about it.”
“Your dad said it’s okay but they’ll ask you muna. Nasa New York ka nun and they wanted your permission. But even before they could tell you, the Diazes offered something bigger for my hand. A better deal.”
Mark watches several emotions pass through Haechan’s face.
“Akala ko masakit na pinamimigay lang ako but to realize I actually had a specific price? Sobrang bull shit. So since wala pa naman napagkasunduan sa side nyo, the talks were scrapped and I was engaged to Sungchan.”
“You’ve never talked about that with me before…”
“What? The engagement? Or the way I broke it and made a mess of my life?”
“All that. Including how we almost got engaged. And you are not a mess, Haech. You stood up for yourself. You did right.”
“Hmm… I do think I’m better now. Sungchan wasn’t bad. He was nice to me, willing to marry me too. We’re still friends now. But I wasn’t in love with him. Actually, my decisions were motivated by Jeno and Jaemin.”
“Jeno and Jaemin?”
“Yep. I saw how they fought for each other, facing the world so bravely na ang tanging meron sila is their love for each other. And I wanted that so much, Mark. I was singing love songs, writing songs about hope and forever, and yet I am marrying someone I did not love. Hindi ko kaya pala.”
“Did you know your parents will cut you off if you broke the engagement?”
“I had hopes they would get mad but would forgive me later. But they completely cut me off and it’s been almost six years na wala akong nakakausap sa magulang ko. But it’s fine. I’m better like this.”
Mark nods, and lightly runs his palms on Haechan’s legs to soothe her.
“Sometimes, I think if it’s you, I would’ve stayed and gotten married to you.”
“I don’t know if I would have said yes back then too, Haech,” Mark answers truthfully.
Haechan tilts her head confusedly. “You don’t want to marry me? Akala ko you liked me since you were 15?”
Mark moves closer to Haechan and lightly kisses her arm.
“I don’t want to marry you out of convenience. I loved you too much, even back then, to trap you into a marriage you didn’t want. I guess I would say yes pala din nun if I knew na maeengage ka din sa iba pero hindi mangyayari yung kasal if you are not in love with me.”
Haechan laughs.
“Silly you. Alam ko naman yun. I know you would’ve waited for me to fall in love with you first. And falling in love with you is easy, now that I know I’m allowed to feel this way.”
“I wouldn’t want you to resent me. You’re the most important person in my life, even back then.”
Haechan changes their position to lean over Mark and kisses him lightly on his lips.
“You did wait. It’s funny, kahit hindi ko alam, you still waited.”
This time it’s Mark who initiated kissing her deeper.
“I wasn’t intentionally waiting, Haechan. Even if you never came, I would still be here because I just never managed to love anyone else.”
*
Haechan released her latest album eight months after she and Mark got together. Most of the songs were obviously inspired by the boy and her title song even has an acoustic version wherein Mark really recorded with her.
It was an awkward experience for Mark at first. The mighty COO of one of the biggest conglomerates in the country isn’t really used to working inside the recording studio. But it was an amazing time for the couple that they decided to convert one of the rooms in the Lee mansion into a quality recording studio.
Very timely because, together with the latest album, Haechan decided that she would be doing one world tour tapos magreretire na sya from the industry.
Mark told her she didn’t have to retire naman but Haechan said she can always sing pa rin naman. She wants to do other things like establishing her own label and finding new talent to launch. She enjoyed working behind the scenes sa album nya so gusto nya pang gumaling and produce for others.
“We’re not getting young, honey,” Haechan says. “It’s time for us to settle down na din. Unless you don’t want pa?”
“You know I’ve been ready for years,” sagot ni Mark. “I want to marry you as soon as possible. But even so, you don’t have to give up your career. You sacrificed so much for this dream.”
“I sacrificed for my happiness, not just this dream. And it was worth it, all the years I spent working on my music. But my dreams have changed now too. I just want to build a family with you now.”
“I’ll make that dream come true,” Mark says, reaching to hold Haechan’s hand tighter. Minsan hindi pa rin sya makapaniwala that they are really together. Haechan teases him often pag nahuhuli nya na nakakatitig lang ito sa kanya. She would ask him “Anong iniisip mo?” and Mark will always answer, “You. Only you.”
*
Haechan watches by the hotel door while Mark walks to his car.
Tumalikod pa ulit si Mark and waves at her again before he rides his car.
Hindi matanggal ang ngiti ni Haechan sa mukha.
Two nights ago, Mark surprised her by coming to her concert. Dahil sa tuwa, Haechan spontaneously added an old song of hers sa setlist nya, one she knows na favorite ni Mark because she can see him putting it in his Instagram stories often.
After the concert, she immediately texted Mark kase gusto niyang mag-dinner sana. But Mark is going on a trip sa isang vineyard nila an hour away from where Haechan is staying.
So Haechan decided to ditch her schedules in LA para sumama sa trip ni Mark.
For almost two days, it’s just the two of them and the beautiful house and the large vineyard. In Haechan’s mind, she pretended they were newlyweds on their honeymoon.
It was a beautiful time, a memory that she will keep forever.
She rushes to her hotel suite upstairs and immediately opens her laptop and keyboard.
She wants to immortalize this feeling through a song.
As she writes her first lyrics, she realizes that this is the second time she’s fallen in love with Mark Lee.
“If I never met you
I wouldn’t have known
How true love feels like”