Work Text:
Shen Xiaoting is pretty. Anyone with a pair of functioning eyes can tell that Xiaoting is ridiculously gorgeous, beautiful, attractive, and everything in between. As far as Yurina can tell, Xiaoting is living proof that God has favorites.
But she’s so much more than that, and Yurina wants to figure her out.
There’s arms around her waist, which surprises her a bit because she’s usually the one with her hands on someone else, never one to hold back her skinship. Yurina sets down her notebook and pen, settling into the embrace.
“Writing?” Xiaoting’s voice comes from behind her, muffled into Yurina’s shoulder. They’ve finished practice for the day, and most of the other girls are resting or socializing. Their very own social butterfly of a cellmate, Youngeun, went off to go bother Bahiyyih and Jia, so it’s just them alone in their room.
The only light comes from Yurina’s side of the room, from the reading light she’s using to write her journal entries for the show. Xiaoting usually keeps her distance, but right now she’s in a touchy mood and Yurina’s more than happy to be on the receiving end of it.
Yurina turns around, seeing Xiaoting in all her bare-faced, bespectacled glory. It’s unfair really, how someone can look that damn good without makeup and running on less than 3 hours of sleep a day.
Her glasses really are cute, though. It’s the fact that Xiaoting’s blind as a bat without them or her contacts that gives Yurina a funny feeling. The nearly-flawless Xiaoting’s only flaw, her eyesight.
Because everything else about her is perfect.
“My diary. For the program,” Yurina responds, easily looking into Xiaoting’s eyes. She could lose herself forever in them, and it must be embarrassing for Xiaoting because she breaks eye contact with a tiny flinch.
There’s not a lot of things they can say to each other, given the language barrier that can’t be overcome with their broken Korean and broken English. But it gives Yurina an excuse to study Xiaoting’s body language, and she’s become somewhat of an expert in the field: Shen Xiaoting, without words.
Yurina wears her heart on her sleeve, and she isn’t afraid to express her admiration, her friendship, her love, with the people she cares about. It’s why she isn’t afraid of skinship or approaching someone first, because she always means what she does. She’s warm to everyone she meets, and especially more so to people she’s close with.
But she’s starting to realize that Xiaoting is different.
“Don’t be shy,” Yurina teases, in English. Xiaoting balks at her words, before back hugging her properly, a tight hold that gives Yurina goosebumps because of its intensity. Because she’s come to know it: unlike Yurina, Xiaoting doesn’t do this with everyone.
“But I am,” Xiaoting counters, in Korean. She says it like it’s obvious. “I am shy.”
It’s the truth. Xiaoting isn’t the quickest to warm up to people, and the little snippets of conversations she’d heard from the C group confirmed it: Xiaoting was usually very quiet, and her fast friendship with Yurina, a foreign girl of all people, was a pretty big shock to everyone.
“You’re not shy with me,” Yurina says, and she feels Xiaoting shrug, one hand rubbing circles on the back of Yurina’s hand with her thumb, where they’ve clasped them tightly together. It’s another thing about her that surprises her. Yurina actively seeks out Xiaoting’s touch, and despite her reserved nature, Xiaoting reciprocates.
And again, she knows she doesn’t do that with everyone. It makes Yurina feel special, and it’s a good feeling.
There’s a bit of insecurity on Xiaoting’s end though, the slight hesitation giving her away. Over the past month, Yurina’s learned how to keep her around, not wanting to accidentally make Xiaoting close herself off. Yurina doesn’t say anything, avoiding adding extra pressure on a moment she knows is extra vulnerable for the other woman.
“I like you,” Xiaoting finally admits, after a long pause. The double meaning, if there is one (and if Yurina isn’t imagining things, there might really be one), is lost in translation.
Yurina really likes Xiaoting. She wonders if love at first sight is real after all, because she’s never felt like this with anyone else before.
It’s the feeling of safety when Xiaoting’s by her side, an automatically calming effect when her anxiety’s running at an all-time high because of the missions. It’s the fact that when Xiaoting reaches for her hand, it makes her heart race for no reason at all. It’s a million little things about Xiaoting that constantly occupy her mind, whether Xiaoting’s eaten breakfast before heading off to practice, or if she’s feeling okay and not bottling up her stress.
She’s always thinking about Xiaoting, and Yurina can’t tell if it’s being around her constantly or something else altogether that’s doing it. Something that’s a little less like a brand new friendship and a little more like love.
From the very first day she met Xiaoting, it felt like she’d known her all her life, and everything she’s gotten to know about her just proves it even more.
“I like you too, Xiaoting,” Yurina replies, and she lets her double meaning get lost in translation too. The Korean words are foreign to both of them. It’s far too easy to blame it on the language barrier, so she does.
There’s something there that scares Yurina a bit, and she disguises it with even more touches, twice as much laughter and even more displays of affection. It’s no secret that her and Xiaoting are close, but Yurina doesn’t know what to do with her desire to have her even closer.
It might be a simple infatuation or a friendship that’ll fizzle out after they aren’t forced to be around each other 24/7, but Yurina feels like it’s more than that.
Her “I like you too” makes Xiaoting blush, and Yurina glows internally at the light pink dusting Xiaoting’s cheeks. She lays down, inviting Xiaoting to cuddle with her, opening her arms wide and playfully making grabby motions with her hands.
Xiaoting giggles. She sets her glasses on the nightstand, accepting the invitation.
“You’re funny,” Xiaoting says, leaving her sentence unfinished. Her voice is normally soft, gentle, but there’s another bit of something mixed in it that Yurina can’t place. Longing? Doubt?
“I like that.” Xiaoting finishes. The softness of her voice is nothing like the intensity in her eyes, a burning that tells Yurina she’s the only thing in Xiaoting’s world. And even if she’d never say it with words, she’d say it with every one of her actions.
It’s funny actually, how Yurina can read Xiaoting like a book, but her own feelings are muddy. She doesn’t know if she likes Xiaoting as a friend, or if her feelings are infringing on something more than that, but she’s more than content to ignore her dilemma and enjoy moments like these. She knows that she’s become one of Xiaoting’s rare best friends, and it’s far more than just enough.
Yurina doesn’t need to say anything, and Xiaoting doesn’t need to hear anything back. Yurina holds her a bit tighter, pressing a kiss to her crown, making Xiaoting laugh. The silence is filled by the sound of Xiaoting’s breathing, and the strong thump of her heartbeat.
They’re tangled up in each other, and Yurina falls asleep in Xiaoting’s arms. It’s her home away from home, the place she never knew she’d find.