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lan wangji wakes up in a panic.
besides a developing headache, something is wrong. he sits up and a phantom touch caresses his cheek.
wei ying
he’s thrown off the covers so carefully tucked around him and swept through the doorway before the wind of his passing could even begin to ruffle the room’s belongings.
he flies through the damp forest until he sees red flicker through the leaves, painting the ground and himself in a ghostly light that takes him back and back and he can’t get there in time won’t get there in time he has to save him he has to tell him—
the final barrier of leaves bend away and he’s there, he’s made it. red is blinding but wei ying is still himself, directing the demonic presence at an amulet— the stygian tiger amulet. lan wangji breathes in. he understands.
pale blue is intertwining with the red without lan wangji consciously deciding to (as most things seem to happen when he’s around wei ying)
wei ying finally notices him then, eyebrows previously scrunched in concentration now arching up in surprise and happiness. he flashes him a smile and lan wangji pours all of what flows through him at that into the amulet.
swirling into a climax, the tendrils finally burst it. he wants to feel relieved, enlightened, but all that lingers is bittersweetness. the past couldn’t be changed but this would protect the future.
“lan zhan!” wei ying calls to him after a few silent moments, smile widening and voice enthusiastic… did he really think he could fool him so easily? he was almost offended.
he walked over, lips curving up despite his worry. he was here, with lan wangji, and they were free. it was all he ever wanted, all that matters next was wei wing’s happiness.
which is why he needed to do this.
“lan zhan?” wei ying’s voice wavered the tiniest bit and that was all the encouragement he needed.
he stared into wei ying’s eyes, now wide in confusion, and reached out to gently cradle his hands in his own. they were calloused; his fingers traced over the bumps reverently. they weren’t marked in the same way his old hands were, but in one he still vowed to memorize.
wei ying’s hands squeezed his in question.
he sighed, briefly closed his eyes, and then spoke.
“will you stay?”
he froze, hands stilling.
“i don’t know yet.”
lan wangji tried to suppress the frown that was deepening on his face, but failed as wei ying reach up to press his thumbs into the corners of his mouth.
his eyes flittered around, giving away his intent studying of lan wangji.
“would you tell me if you wanted me to?”
it was a careful but insistent question; he could duck out and stay silent, letting wei ying be as free as he deserved.
but something was curling around his gut, pushing at the backs of his teeth. if he had been amused at wei ying’s insistence on hiding his emotions from him, it was upsettingly hypocritical for him to believe wei ying didn’t have any idea of his feelings by now.
“stay with me”
the words came out as a prayer, the side strands of his hair falling out in front of him and displacing the cool morning air as he dipped his head in apology of his selfishness.
he waited for a response, anxiety growing each moment, until he heard a couple of sharp intakes of breath.
was he crying??
lan wangji jolted his head up in concern, but it was instantly clear that wei ying was not crying, he was laughing.
a visible joy graced him as his shoulders shuddered in laughter.
“lan zhan, why would i possibly say no to that?” he was still laughing but he brought his eyes up to stay with lan wangji. “you dumbass, we’re married and you think i would leave you? am i that unreliable?!”
they were—?
lan wangji was frozen.
“hm? lan zhan?” wei ying patted his cheeks softly. “did i break you?”
his mind felt like all its cells had stopped working, but he forced his mouth to move.
“we.”
“yes?” wei ying encouraged.
“when?” he had resumed his hold on his hands and he was very glad, as he was worried he would fall over.
“you—! you seriously didn’t realize?!” wei ying exclaimed in disbelief. “we bowed three times! you let me touch your headband— not to mention you tying me up in it—!”
“i. what.”
“you were drunk, but that’s not the point! i literally just had my epiphany about that too….” he shook lan wangji’s hands up and down and a choruses of chiding “lan zhan”s fell from his mouth.
yes, lan wangji may have been trying to drop hints (they could barely qualify as hints by now) but—
“i guess i didn’t do a good enough job of showing it then,” wei ying finally calmed down enough to muse.
and suddenly his hands were back, framing his face, and wei ying was closer than he ever dreamed of having him, and finally, his lips pressed against his.
was this… real? it felt real; wei ying’s mouth was warm and soft and insistent, his hands moving up to tangle into his hair.
it was everything he had ever wanted.
and so he deepened the kiss and wrapped his arms around wei ying’s waist ( his wei ying), so they were pressed together as much as was physically possible.
it all was so, so right. nothing had ever felt this natural before.
rule following. rule breaking. if he does it for wei ying, even if nothing becomes of it, it’s right.
(though he will thank fate day and night that something became of this)
after an eternity of them moving together, wei ying draws away, eyes crescent with a smile. and lan wangji loves his smile but that’s not what he’s been starved of for so long so tries to chase his lips— but with a finger to his partly opened mouth he stops him.
“later, lan zhan, later you can have all of me,”
—a buzz shoots through lan wangji’s fingertips like lightening, he wants —
“but not here, ok? let’s go, i want a life with you”
his finger is still tracing lines back and forth on his lower lip, making it hard for lan wangji to comprehend anything he’s saying.
“lan zhan? hello? you aren’t still drunk right?”
and his fingers move to pat his cheek.
lan wangji blinks and focuses.
“anywhere. as long as it’s with wei ying”
he grins in response, but lan wangji is already on trajectory towards his mouth.