Chapter Text
A pale moon hung above me, not a cloud in sight. I could feel the gaze of something, of something ancient staring at me. Hairs standing on end I felt a shiver pass through me. Every part of me was begging for me to run, to run away from whatever unseen thing was preying onto me.
I let out a shaky gasp, my back huddled against my bedroom wall. The solidness of the wall, of the soft carpet floor being the only thing that grounded me from the memories. From the thoughts that were plaguing my every waking moment..
The forest was wrong, the trees bigger than they should be. The pale moon shining on them in ways that should not be possible. If I took a moment I could hear something, I could hear something’s laug-
The blaring sound of my alarm clock snapped me out of my thoughts. Sweat clung to my skin as I realized that I didn’t get a lick of sleep. I haven’t gotten any sleep since I went out there with Stiles. When I went out there and got attacked.
When I died and all of this started happening.
I don’t even remember coming home, all I remember was getting mauled, falling to the forest floor and slowly dying. I’m pretty sure I died but that can’t be right, I’m right here. I’m alive right now, I can’t be dead then right?
The alarm clock rang again, the noise drawing me out of my thoughts.
I’m alive, all of this has to be me just having some messed up dream or me hallucinating from the lack of sleep.
Hands clenched as I tried to convince myself that was true, that my memories were just tricking me and I wasn’t dealing with some unexplainable. That when I check my side, that when I check the wound that I should have from getting bitten.
That it isn’t gone.
My breaths came out in shallow pants, shallow heavy pants that were ruining me. I couldn’t control myself, I was dealing with something that I could control. That I couldn’t fix, it was my own mind playing tricks on me.
I was my own joke.
A wolf, a pale Porcelain wolf stared at me. It’s head tilted slightly to the left. The wolf was the only thing in the clearing with me, the only thing that I knew was friendly. It wasn’t like the haunting moon or the shadow covered things that lay in the forest. It was my frei-
“Scott! Get up, I got breakfast ready!” Mom shouted, beautiful amazing mom who drew me out of my thoughts. Who saved me from remembering what happened there, what happened in my mind.
Because that has to be all this is, this all has to be in my head, in my dreams. All of it is fake and I just have to understand that. All of that was fake and this is real.
It might have been a false sense of bravado that let me get up and force myself to get dressed but it was enough for me. It was enough for me not to flash back to those memories, to the forest where a pale moon hung above me.
Mom distracted me, for a moment at least. She had to leave though, she gave me breakfast, told me she loved me, and headed to work. It was her normal routine and right now I hated it more than anything.
She made sure to wish me good luck on my first day back to school at least.
Distorted shadows, dark shades of people crept through the woods. Each one carrying some form of weapon, machites, swords, a few even had bows. Their faces were covered in shadows, something about them gave the same feeling to me that the moon did.
I gripped my steel sword with a frenzy.
I need to get to school, school will have other kids and other kids will be able to keep me grounded. I need Stiles, I need him because he’ll be able to tell me what happened. He’ll be able to tell me if all of this is real.
I need him to tell me that this is real and all of that was fake.
Running to school, my backpack barely packed up and slung, wasn’t the smartest choice I’ve ever made. I have asthma, a medical condition that has plagued me my whole life, something that has basically ruined me.
Except I didn’t feel it, I didn’t feel the signs of a burn developing in my chest or the pain of having my ability to breath ripped away from me. I was able to exhaust myself, recover and keep on running all the way to school.
I forced myself to ignore how much that scared me, how much that terrified me because how the heck did my asthma go away?
I was able to get to school finding Stiles quickly, or in more accurate words he’s found me.
“So what happened last night?” I asked, Stiles latching to my side as we walked to the front door of school. Students passing by all of us, real people who I knew, who I could remember clearly. This place wasn’t some shadowed memory, it wasn’t some forest filled with things.
Dried crusty blood caked the forest floor, the sound of something eating, tearing, devouring echoing through the silent sky. Whatever it was, it was small and it was hungr-
Stiles punched my arm, a playful punch that nearly sent me into a panic attack. “What is up with you dude?”
I took in a deep breath. “I need to ask you a question.” Stiles gave me a confused look but nodded, he was an amazing friend like that. “Did you hear howling last night?” The question almost sounded desperate.
If he says that he didn’t then that means it all wasn’t real, it means that I was there, it means that I didn’t take a sword in my own and kill someone.
“Ah, yea.” Stiles said, my heart dropping into my stomach did so “It was probably some dog.”
“Not a wolf?”
“Wolfs aren’t native to California Scott.” Stiles raised an eyebrow at me before becoming distracted by Lydia. I couldn’t even begin to follow the switch in conversation.
Stiles heard the howling, he heard the howling of the wolf as it chased me down, as it mauled me and tore into my side. Leaving dead on the forest floor, the only thing visible being the full moon above me.
The first step I made out of the woods and some pale things erupted from the ground, each one horrifying and terrifying to look at. They were scared, wrinkled and carrying three different weapons. Offering them up to me like gifts.
I sucked my breath, watching with silent trepidation as Stiles moved to follow Lydia inside.
I forced myself to go to my first class, to ignore how the shadows seemed to get just a bit darker. I could barely get a handle on myself as the teacher talked. I couldn’t even pay attention to the fact that some girl came in late to class.
All my effort was going into trying to stay awake, to not let myself close my eyes and fall asleep. The zero sleep I got last night, the zero sleep I got from suffering through the for sure fake memories.
I felt the girl behind me tap my shoulder, startling me enough that I almost jumped out of my seat.
“Sorry,” I heard her whisper, a tinge of a blushing erupting on her face. “Do you have a pen.”
The contact, the conversation drew me out of my thoughts and all I could do was smile and hand her one of my extra pens.
I can get through this, I can get through these memories. All I have to do is keep myself grounded. I just have to interact with people, talk with my friends and keep myself distracted. All I had to do was not fall asleep because for some unknown reason my gut was telling me that would be bad.
Really bad.
The class passed and I forced myself to be social, I forced myself to talk and interact with anybody that was near me. I wasn’t social on a good day, really the only person I talked to on a regular basis was Stiles and that was because we were best friends.
Talking to people that I barely see on passing, that I barely ever interacted with before would have been a nightmare situation.
I let out a tired sigh, my back against my locker as I took a moment to just breath. The darkened shadows were almost gone, I was still tired but the adrenaline from forcing myself to talk, to go out of my comfort zone, was pushing me through it
The dark haired girl, the girl who gave me the idea to do all of this was across from me. On the other side of the hallow way a little ways away from me.
Stiles spreaded next to me, talking about something that I could barely follow. If I subtly leaned into him, my arm brushing against him a little too closely he didn’t seem to say anything about it. Whether or not he was just being nice or was just oblivious to it is up to debate.
It Stiles though so it really could be either one.
“That's nice Stiles” I murmured, resisting the temptation to let out a yawn.
“Yea dude I mean why would he ever do that.” Stiles said before shaking his head, the lacrosse stick on his back reminding me that I had something to do after school. That tryout was going to be happening.
I want to get on the frontlines, at least I want to get out of sitting on the bench for the whole season never to be used.
I stumbled back, the slashing blade of a machattie being the last thing I saw along with the decapitated head of a corpse. A corpse that was created by me.
I gritted my teeth and smiled, not a hint of the mania running through me right now. The memories rushing through my head, the memories telling me that I was a murderer.
They weren't real though, they were no monsters in the shadows. There weren't faceless hunters stalking through the forest. There wasn’t a clearing in the middle of the forest that held a living doll wolf and tiny weird friendly monster things that gave me a sword.
It was all in my head.
“Let’s get to tryouts.” I said, my voice coming out rushed as I felt the shadows around me darken.
Stiles muttered something under his mouth that I couldn’t hear.
I tried not to run from the shadows that seemingly followed me, Stiles trailing not so silently behind me.
--- Teen Hunter ---
I felt my breaths start to quicken, the cold air made my breaths come out in puffs of smoke. I could feel myself start to shiver despite the clothing I was wearing. Despite the protective gear and jersey I was wearing.
The lacrosse stick felt familiar in my hands, it had to because I’ve been doing lacrosse for ever. I’ve always liked the sport and always wanted the chance to actually for real play it. I just wish that the chance I got for tryouts wasn’t when I was one second away from having a panic attack.
They noticed me, the faceless hunters. Each one reading their weapons up as they circle around me, my sword being held in front of me with little to know drive. If they had faces they would be laughing at me, laughing at their prey. One of the hunters with a bow notched an arrow and fired it at me.
I don’t know what happened to me during those moments, what happened to me between the moments I was bitten and woke up back at home but if they are real, if they actually did happen in some capacity.
The world around me grew several levels darker, each step making the shadows that have been plaguing me almost seem like they were reaching for me, the bright sun shining down on everyone not doing anything against them. Nobody seemed to notice them, notice the shadows that crept ever closer to me, that moved through people like waves.
If those memories were real than catching a ball has to be easy right?
I felt something touch me, the feeling of shadows, of something indescribable passing by me and it took all of my effort not to jump. Not to start running away from where i was until the school field was a passing memory.
The world grew darker, the only thing visible being the field in front of me and the students waiting in line. Each one waiting for their turn to throw the ball, to score an easy win against the poor helpless kid who sits on the bench .
My grip tightened around the lacrosse stick, my vision darkening further as the first student moved.
I didn’t know what I expected, maybe with all of the shadows and whatever was happening to me that maybe I’d instantly catch the ball. It might have been a pretty good mark, a good sign that whatever is happening while horribly, traumatic and just awful couldn’t be totally bad. That didn’t happen though, instead I missed by a second. The ball barely passed by my stick and hit the net.
It was a decent movement at least, one that had just about the same level of skill of most of the players on the team. I wasn’t even feeling the burn in my chest from over exhausting myself to boot.
The darkness disappeared instantly, my field of view coming back as the world burst into color and action once again. I felt my eyes sting from the whiplash, a headache appearing violently. I tried not to flinch.
The next throw I was able to catch but that was more out of my own ability than anything else, I could still feel the shadows in the corner of my vision. Shadows waiting for the chance to encroach onto me like they did so just a moment ago.
As I was set off from the goalie spot, receiving a passing remark from the Coach on my improvement. I felt myself let out a tiny sigh.
I probably wasn’t good enough for the frontline and what is happening to me, whatever fake or real memories I’m experiencing obviously wasn’t helping. All I had right now was myself and what ever I could do to make it so I wouldn’t be consumed by my memories.
Darkness crept closer once again before receding, a passing touch to Stiles causing the reaction.
I had to do something about this, I had to figure out whatever is happening to me because no matter what I say or deny something is happening to me. I just hope the explanation isn’t the fact that I’m going insane.
Stiles would hate me if I ended up just like his mom.
Lacrosse practice ended and I was back in the forest. Stiles wanted to come along with me, come and hang out with me as he would say but I asked him not to. I didn’t want to come here, come to the place where I’m pretty sure I went insane.
Darkness hung close to the trees, the woods making my skin crawl with memoires, with the not real yet so real memoires. The memories that involved me holding a sword I didn’t know how to use but fit in my hand so right running away from everything trying to kill me.
The forest was calm, less sinister then the one in my memories. This forest was sullen in a way, like a scar was ripped through it and it was healing, the one in my head though was like if that scar decided to fester instead of heal.
I took in a deep breath my heart hammering in my chest as I arrived at the spot, as I arrived at the spot where I was attacked. Where I was attacked by the red eyed wolf, the place where all of this started.
The place where I started feeling all of this, started to see the darkening shadows, and having those memories.
It wasn’t that special of a spot really, the trees were the same as every other part of the forest. There wasn’t something unique at all about this area, except for the fact that the forest floor was dyed red with blood.
With my blood.
My nails dug into my palm as I stared at the forest floor, as I stared at the area where I knew I bleed out, where I died.
Shadows darkened around me and I didn’t try and fight them off this time. I couldn’t draw myself away from the red coating that told everything that I feared, that I was so horribly wrong. That I died and somehow came back.
Shadows clung to me, the passing touches of something brushing against me as I stared at the blood.
I felt myself fall down or maybe I was dragged down, I could tell either way. I was too busy trying to understand how I died, how I was mauled, bled out, and came back. How something so impossible happened.
I just couldn’t rationalize it, I couldn’t figure out how it happened.
I could feel a weight lay on me, a heaviness that was making a slump to the ground. Exhaustion was overwhelming, the feeling of everything I’ve been through this day and a half coming ahead right now.
I knew something bad was going to happen if I went to sleep, I knew something was going to happen but I couldn’t care less right now what my gut said because I just give up. I give up on standing strong.
I fell asleep and awoke to the sight of a pale moon.
--- Teen Hunter ---
Before when I was here I was barely conscious, I couldn’t really remember anything at all. Just the big moments, the moments that scared me. That made my heart thunder and me gasp for breath.
The pale moon hanged above me, looking at me with one sickening eye. I could feel something stare back at me, something that made me feel like it was prey.
I’m back here, I feel asleep and I’m back here. At least I now know why my gut was telling me not to go to asleep now. I just wish I didn’t have to figure that out this way. That I didn’t go back to this place again after dying here.
Though that is probably the only way out of here, dying. If I die I’ll wake up like nothing happened, like I didn’t fall asleep and wake up in this nightmare of a dream.
Dream, that's a good name for this place because these surely aren’t just my memoires any more.
The Porcelain wolf sat down next to me taking me out of my thoughts, the dark fur of theirs hiding the pale white skin it had. A set of brown eyes stared at me with from what I could tell was interest.
“I guess I have one friend here.” I muttered giving the thing a scratch, it didn’t react at all to the movement. Not a sign that it hated or liked the fact that I just scratched behind its ear, a place that would have sent most dogs in the clinic into a joyful spurt of movement.
It was just there.
The forest around me seemed to mock me, mock me in the way eyes stared at me from the corner of my vision, mock in the way that the shadows clung to the edges of the clearing making small movements inside before backing away quickly.
Showing that they could come closer but chose not to.
I felt it appear in my hand, the steel sword that was handed to me by the wrinkled blue things. The steel sword I was gripping with an unholy zest as I stared at the forest. I could feel something building, the same feeling that made me adventure into the forest in the first place before.
Want. Hunger. Desire.
I took a step forward before I could stop myself. A small step into the forest, my foot crunching the fallen leaves.
Am I really about to go back out there? Do I really want to go back out there? Everything in the forest wants to kill me from the animals to the people, if you could even call those things animals or people. I don’t think there is a single friendly face there, in the forest.
I took in a deep breath, the pale moon hanging above me somehow taunting me yet providing the light I ever so needed.
This clearing, I haven’t found it while I was awake when I was looking for where I died but I know that this forest is just like the one there in the waking world so that means that there'll be a town. A town that will hopefully have people or something that’ll be able to tell what the heck is happening here.
The courage that entered me was more than a little shallow, I only felt like not running and hiding because of the fact that I knew I would die here everything would be fine. That when, not if, I’d just wake up once again, I would wake up back in the real world leaving whatever this place was behind.
I would leave the dream and come back to the real world.
The first step I took out of the forest I felt my nerves heighten, my heart thunder in my chest as I flet shadows cling to me. The forest was already dark but now it was almost pitch black. The only way I’d know if something was near me was if they made any noise.
The Forest was distressingly silent.
“Grow- Whimper '' My breath stopped, my heart skipping a beat as I recognized that sound. It was the sound of the hunters, of the people who killed me after I killed one of their own, after I committed murder.
I wonder if they remember me, if they remember the fact that I killed one of them.
I took in a deep breath as my heart grew more rapid.
I could go over there, go over there to where the hunters were and see if the person who I murdered was alive. See if the mistake I made, the life I took was rolled back by some weird dream logic. But really does that matter in the end? I still killed them.
I killed someone.
Stiles would probably try and console me, remind me of the fact that it was self defense and that they were monsters. Mom would ball her heart out and Sherif, he’d probably never be able to look me in the eyes ever again.
Stiles' reasoning though is wrong yet right. Everything here is a monster, yes, but that also includes me probably. I wanted to be a veterinarian when I grew up for the simple reason that I wanted to help animals.
The sounds of whimpers reminded me what they were doing, that they were killing a pack of dogs.
The dogs were probably just as messed up as everything else in this world but thought still ripped through me like a sharp lash, a metal tipped whip. I felt my teeth grit against each other, I couldn’t help them. How was I supposed to take them down? I don’t want to kill someone, I don’t even think I could fight all of them.
I don’t want to have to kill anyone ever again.
The shock that was probably on their shadowed faces, the surprise in their bodys as I slashed, as I cut one of the hunters head off of their body in a single strik-.
That wasn’t me, it was me but it wasn’t. It was like my body went on autopilot, the shock and fear overwhelming me leaving something else in its place. I’d call it a hunter, a killer but that doesn’t seem right.
It doesn’t fit the feelings I felt, the hunger that was in my veins then.
I don’t want to ever feel that again. I don’t want to ever feel that good, that bad, that whatever it was. I just don’t want to be like that ever again, it wasn’t me. It was like I was embracing some lizard part of my brain except it was less lizard and more murder ape.
It felt too good.
I took a step away from the slowly dying down sounds of a fight than another and another before I couldn’t even hear them any more. My heart was in my stomach, a sick feeling that was probably going to ruin me when I woke up.
I really am pathetic, running from fights because I can’t even bring myself to use a sword. To kill some obviously evil people, monsters who don’t even have faces who probably kill anything that comes into their path like a bunch of psychos.
The crunching leaves, the sound of my footsteps were interrupted by the sound of cawing, of something snapping a branch and leaping towards me from above. I was barely able to get out of the way of whatever it was and even then I still got scratched up.
It was a crow and it looked awful. It didn’t look like a normal bird though. It was deformanded, it’s body and head was bigger than it should have been and it was injured. Dried blood caking it’s wings and legs.
Even after it’s failed attack it was still crawling towards me, hauling itself forward with it’s whole body. Each movement looked like it would send the thing into a pain filled screech, even with the pain it was causing itself with every move it was still dragging itself towards me.
It dragged itself closer to me. Blood was leaking out of the thing’s beak, a dried black blood that dripped down onto the forest floor.
It was an injured animal, a terrifying scary injured animal. It’s wings were broken and one of its legs looked scratch but I knew how to take care of it. I could take care of it, I spent a good chunk of my teenage life working as an assistant veterinarian.
I’m used to taking care of dogs and cats but I know what to do in case a bird gets hurt.
I can’t help it now though, I couldn’t even if I wanted to. Everything that I would need to help it, medicine, bandages, alcohol, all of it was out of my reach. I was stuck in my dreams with only one solution to it’s problems.
A steel sword.
Mr Deatan doesn’t practice animal euthiansia, a fact that I am happy about because it meant I never had to deal with all of this before.
“Snap” The loud sound, a sound that shouldn't have been that loud, echoed through the forest as the deformed crow broke one of its legs. It broke one of it’s limbs crawling over to me. The grip on my sword tightened as I felt my mind race.
I took a step away from the thing and ran. I couldn’t even bring myself to try and mercy kill the thing, the crow. Never mind the fact that I don’t know I would do that, I can barely stomach the idea of fighting right now, never mind actually using the sword in my hands to kill something.
I kept an eye on the trees above, an eye looking out for any more crows waiting to try and ambush me.
Of course though with my eye to the sky I only barely heard the sound of hissing. The sound of leaves crunching and before I knew it I was being thrown on the ground, my back hitting the forest floor with a loud thud.
The last thing I saw was a snake, scales green and black, biting my face.
I died for a third time.
--- Teen Hunter ---
I’ve been to the dream place one more time after that, it was my shortest time yet also because when I left I got almost immediately jumped by the hunters. An arrow in my shoulder and a machete cutting off my head before I could even think of running.
The death was unpleasant, the hunters seemed to take a sick joy out of killing me. The worst part of it is the fact that I accidentally fell asleep, that is how I got another death added to the list. Another death that made me decide that I was going to do the most obvious solution. I was never going to sleep ever again.
It was unpleasant to say the least, sleep is something that people need but for some reason I can’t push through it. Oh I still want to sleep and I feel so freaking tired but I don’t need it.
Three days without sleep and the shadows around me were not receding as much as they used to, they were not backing down anymore either. They just stood there mocking me. The worst part though is the touches, the moments when shadows touched me.
They never got close enough to actually touch me, staying a little distance away from me and anything living but that didn’t mean I didn’t feel anything. I can feel the things that touch me so much more clearly than before, scales, fur, claws. Whatever they were or it was, they had everything.
There might be more than one thing touching actually now that I’m thinking about it.
Rain pelted outside, the light of the veterinarian office clashing with the shadows and darkness. I could hear the animals, the ones that were awake at least, moving. The bag I was carrying, the bag full of food, was dragged into the room filled with cats.
They gave me a look and hid, the cats all of them hid in the corner of their cages as far away from me they could.
“You guys okay?” I muttered, approaching one of the cages. I got a scratching hiss in response, a hiss that sounded so scared. It was scared, the cat was scared of me for some reason. Why were they scared of me?
Shadows grew closer, for a moment they looked like claws. Sharp, dangerous claws that were reaching for me.
I wish I could say I was angry, that I was distressed by the fact that I was getting such a strong and strange response from the animals. With everything that has happened, the shadows, the dreams, the me killing someone that was maybe justified but maybe not, that the fact that some animals are scared of doesn’t really matter that much that
Is it bad that I’m becoming numb to all of this, numb to the fact that I've died four times now? That I’ve had my head cut off twice, bleed out in the middle of a forest and got Ko'd by a giant snake.
Let’s go with a yes and leave it at that.
Feeding the cats wasn’t fun, not like it usually is at least but ignoring the hissing was easy enough. at least when I wasn’t getting snake flashbacks.
It might not have lasted that long as deaths go but it was just as painful as any other one I’ve experienced before. The only thing that it had over every other of death was the fact that it was quick, that it wasn’t the painful experience of me bleeding out or the terror of being killed by the dream hunters.
Another messed up thing I never thought I’d ever be able to do, rank how painful deaths are. Seems like a Stiles thing to do really, he’d probably get a kick out of it if he knew about all of this.
If I have it my way the only person who’ll ever know any of this, the shadows, the dreams, everything. Will be me, myself and I. I’m not going to be telling anyone about the beasts I feel touching me, the shadows that darken when I start to lose myself.
The way that my dreams seem to be begging for me to take up my sword and hunt.
I know that I’m probably not going to hold up this status quo but I’m going to try to as long as I can. I don’t want to be making any big choices just yet, I don’t want to have to decide if I should be able to defend myself against the monsters in there, in my dreams.
Stiles would probably call me insane and I’d have no way to prove myself otherwise. I don’t think I’d want to prove to him that everything that was happening was real, some part of me hopes it is not but I know that is just useless fantasy by now. He shouldn’t ever have to deal with this, to deal with the gnawing feeling of paranoia and the urge to hold something, anything to defend yourself.
Thank every god out there my sword, the sword that was always in my grip in the dream world no matter what I did, didn’t follow me from there to out here. That’d be hard to explain to everybody.
Shadows retreated away from me, the loud sound of banging echoing through the clinic. It was the sound of someone banging on the front door, the big question on why would someone come to place in the middle of the night when it’s closed.
When my Boss isn’t here to help them.
Ends it was pen girl who was creating the ruskus and she was nearly having a panic attack over the fact that she ran over a dog. It was such a mundane thing, so normal that I felt the shadows fully reside for the first time today.
Though the fact that the dog allowed for her to pick them up after she hit them was probably the most off thing about this whole situation. Like the dog most definitely should have been snippy, unless it was trained to be passive but I can’t really test that. Well, I can’t test that humanly.
It’s nice to not have to deal with the dream, to be able to deal with normalish stuff.
A hurt dog that just needed a cast and a reassuring pet. I tried to ignore the way the dog seemed to flinch at the sight of me, that it looked like if it could it would have ran to the other side of the room to cower from me.
I really hope that whole fear thing isn’t permanent because that would seriously put a damper on things.
Now let’s talk to pen girl and see what's up with her, like why she’s been awkwardly standing to the side the whole time not saying a single word.
Because quite frankly it’s getting weird, not as weird as me being a maybe murder but still pretty werid.
--- Teen Hunter ---
I got invited onto a date, she wants to go to a party with me. Like a real date, something that has never happened to me. I mean Stiles got onto a date and I’ve tagged along once or twice as a double but that doesn’t really count.
If I didn’t immidly along the way home get ran over by a car, I got hit by a car along the way home. That, how does that even happen! Well, I know how it happened. I was doing what I was supposed to do but with the darkness and rain pouring down on everything they didn’t see me and before they did, it was too late.
They are so lucky that my body for some reason disappears after I die, so god dang lucky because they killed me and are going to get away with it. I mean I was still conscious as I bled out on the street, as I died, and they didn’t even stop they just continued driving off.
At least I got the license number, I don’t know what I’d do with said number but I got it. Maybe I’ll tp their house or something if I ever run into their car again. A bit of a petty thing to do when the person literally ran you over but it’s not like I could do anything in response.
So yea I died again and I’m right back in the forest, where I’ll die again and be sent back into the real world. It's really depressing that this is going to be normalized probably, that the pain of death is going to become something that I’ll just have to deal with. I really hope that happens no time soon though.
There has to be a way out of here, a way out of here that doesn’t involve me getting a caved in head or being beheaded by some hunters because while I might live past it, I might come back from it, it’s most surely not a pleasant experience.
Stiles, what would he even do in this situation? I don’t know because while I know the dude better than my own Mom sometimes this situation is so out there that I don’t even have a faint of an idea on how he would act.
The steel sword was in my grip, not a single memory of me picking it up. Freaky but with everything else that's happened here it really doesn’t even breach into the top five list of weirdness.
Except I had a big blocking point towards any sort of discovery, the fact that the forest was filled with monsters that I don’t want to fight. Monster’s that I don’t want to force myself to kill, I don’t want to do anything with anybody in there.
I guess I do have someone, someone with a debatable amount of intelligence who I could ask.
A little searching, searching that was quick with the clearing being flat and all of that, I found the doll wolf laying down acting like it was sleeping. Maybe it was really sleeping, why would it need to when it was you know a doll I don’t know.
With everything here not really running by sane logic I couldn’t even begin to guess how things worked.
Is gravity even a thing here? A quick jump answered that.
Yea it was here. I don’t really know what I expected on that count because if it wasn’t here literally everything here would be dead which granted would make going back to the real world a lot easier.
At least the dream has some rules inside of it, even if an example of said rules is literally as foundational and basic as gravity. I wonder how Mr Harris would think of all of this, of how this world and basically everything about it screws with every bit of logic that there is.
The dude is always going on and on about science and stuff, reputation is not a good teaching tool for me personally, that he might have a fit at the sight of this place. That’d be pretty funny actually.
I woke up the doll wolf, the thing getting up and just staring at me with it’s beady brown eyes. It was still as unnerving and uncanny as it usually is, a doll that looked like it was alive yet not at the same time.
“Do you know where the exit is?” Let’s hope this thing really is smart enough to understand me
Some part of me expected for the wolf to start speck, like some wonderland levels of crazy but no all it did was point it’s head towards a section of the forest. Pointing towards the area where I’ll hopefully be able to get out of here without dying.
I didn’t really know how I should thank him, how I should say thank you to the Porcelain wolf. I just gave it a quick pat on the head and journeyed forth into the forest where I’ve now died three times.
Two of which were incredibly traumatizing while the third was only mildly traumatizing.
Dark coils, elongated fainings, the sound of hissing screeching through the silent forest air. I didn’t even have the chance to move before I died, before I crashed into the ground and had my face caved in by it’s bite.
Let's bump that mildly traumatizing death to an incredibly traumatizing one. I think I might have a phobia of snakes now too, which sucks because at the veterinary clinic we take care of snakes every now and then.
Their tiny things granted, no anacondias but I'd like to not have a flashback while I’m taking care of a snake the size of a ruler.
The sword felt heavy in my hands, even right now after being killed so many times I didn’t want to fight anything. I didn’t want to kill anything here, I'm pretty sure I could do it if I wanted to. The sword feels so easy in my grip and something about it makes me use it so fluidly.
Like it was made for me or I was made for it.
I’ve gotten a good basis on where in the forest I was, the clearing was a spot that I’m pretty sure didn’t exist but I’m able to use other parts of the forest to figure out where I was. Though that method took me actually understanding the structure of the forest in the first place.
Something that I only had the most bare bones knowledge in.
I’ve been tempted to go back into the forest to find some direction to it but it’s kinda obvious why I haven’t. The least of which being the fact that whoever or whatever started all of this, they also lead to me bleeding out in the middle of the wood might be still there.
Even if I’ve got some confusing and pretty traumatizing immortality going around, a thought that I never thought I’d ever have to think about, dying still sucks.
It sucks, like it sucks really bad.
The forest was silent as usual, the shadows dancing forward and backward as I moved forward. I don’t know what things might be in the way, what monsters might be waiting to attack me, to increase my death count by one. Maybe this time instead of a deformed crow, a giant snake, or a inane human being it’ll be some other monstrous nightmare.
I swear if one of my deaths were caused by a bunny I might stab myself, not that I would do that much actually. Stiles would tease me so much if he learned that ever happened. I guess it’s a good thing that he’s ignorant about all of this then.
The day that someone else learns of this is going to be a day too soon because I barely have come to terms with everything, at moments I still wonder if I’m insane if all of this is just me hallucinating.
If I’m just plain crazy.
A branch cracked, the sound echoing through the forest. Looking around while I prepared myself for whatever was near me, trying to figure out if I heard any noise that would give me a clue of what they were but I didn’t hear anything. There wasn’t any hissing or cawing, there was nothing until I heard the sound of a growl. A deep growl that sounded oddly in pain.
Gripping my sword in both hands I prepared, what was I preparing to do? I wasn’t going to fight the thing, at best all I’ll do is run from it because I don’t want to kill. I don’t want to do anything of the sort.
It was a scared dog, milky white eyes and black fur shining at me, brown fur on its underside. Though the most noticeable thing beside its fur was the injuries layering it, cuts and slight wounds on its body. A bright silver arrow was in it’s shoulder, an arrow that I was intimately familiar with.
The hunter went down, their head falling away from their body almost sickeningly easy. I didn’t get a moment of rest though because before I knew it I was hit by an arrow, a bright silver arrow covered in some purple herb.
Hunters, the dogs that were attacked by them and by the looks of it this guy might be the last one left. The last dog of their little pack, the last one to be hunted down and killed like prey. Like they weren't a living creature.
I felt myself tighten my grip around the steel sword, my knuckles turning white as I stared at the animal. Stared at the way it was growling at me, even though it was literally helpless to me. Helpless to any one who would find them.
With me being working at the clinic I’ve worked with a lot of dogs, I have worked with them enough to know that this guy is a German Shepherd. I also know enough that this dog is going to die soon, that the wounds it has on itself, the injuries that it got from the hunters.
It’s going to die soon, it’s going to die soon and I couldn’t do anything about it. It’s just like that crow all over again.
What should I even do in this situation, I know how to deal with most dog injuries but that's when I have tools on hand. I guess i could calm it down but that doesn’t seem like it would work really, those milky white eyes are kinda unnerving.
A hustle of the bushes sent me standing and with the dog in front of me the hunters approached from the left. I don’t know exactly why but I moved to block the hunters from the dog, It was just something I did.
I ran away from almost every fight here. I don’t want to kill anyone but I got to stand up at some point. I gotta draw the line in the sand, I ran away while the hunters were fighting the dog pack earlier and it ended up like this.
If I have to fight to stop them, to put an end to their hunt, then I will.
Shadows rushed forward, blocking everything but the hunters in front of me. They were all here, one wielding a machete, another an axe, with the last one holding a bow. They were staring at me and I could feel the amusement coming from them.
They probably thought that I was going to run away, that I was going to leave the shepherd at their mercys.
Well screw that, I refuse to run anymore. For once in this nightmarish place I’m going to stand up for myself. I’m going to freaking stand up on my own two legs if it kills me and then even then I’ll come back for round two.
It feels weird to be able to say that and actually mean it.
I rushed forward, nearly tripping over my own steps as I slashed. The hunter with the axe, the one I was slashing at, blocked my attack and kicked, sending me flying. The kick had way too much power in it. It felt like I just got full blown tackled by some of the bigger kids in lacrosse. Not someone who matched me in height.
The dream hunters have super strength, just great.
I forced myself up and held my sword forward. I might be able to use this thing, the steel sword, in a fight but I am no where good enough, experienced enough to actually fight. Even more so when I’m facing a bunch of terrifying enemies.
I still don’t know how I did it but I dodge an arrow fired at me and charged at them once again, the hit was blocked again by the axe hunter but instead of getting kicked I kicked them. Not a single moment in my life have I been so happy that I’ve exercised, that I spent way too much time bulking up for lacrosse even though I never had a real chance of getting in.
Asthma ruins a lot of a teenagers’ sports potential.
The kick made the hunter stumble and right when I was pulling the same move that took out the other hunter, the person I murdered, the machete wielding hunter slashed at me cutting my arm with the curved blade.
The attack was barely skin deep but it stunned me enough that I almost didn’t get out of the way of the second slash.
I stared at the three of them, their posture vastly different from what they were in the beginning. Instead of the amusement they seemed serious, the faceless shadowed hunters staring at me like I had the chance of killing them.
Why they never acted like this when I did kill one of their own, one who seemed to have stayed dead like I secretly expected.
My arm hung limpy on my side. Light amounts of blood leaking onto the forest floor, I could feel myself start to woozy. Shadows, the formless things with claws, were reaching towards me. Creeping in on the edges of my vision.
I clenched my teeth, my one working arm clinching even tighter onto the steel sword. Even with the shadows creeping closer, even with my stomach rolling as I felt myself become more and more sick I couldn't help but feel determined.
I wasn’t going to give up, I was going to take these guys down. I wasn’t going to let them kill this goddamn dog.
I was going to kill them.
I charged, it was reckless stupid and should have gotten me killed but they didn’t expected it. They didn’t expect for me to charge at them like an idiot so when I slashed at the axe wielding hunter, I struck true.
Blade met flesh and the arm of the axe hunter was cut off another attacking be soon followed, a stab to the hunters chest. Just like before I didn’t get a chance to breath before the two other hunters responded to my kill, to my murder. A duck, a side step, more blood leaking from my arm, darkness creeping ever closer.
The bow wielding hunter didn’t stand a chance, one slash and a light attempt to block my hit and they were also down for the count. Dying or dead on the forest floor, right now I couldn’t even care which as long as they were out of the fight.
Two dead bodys, two dead monsters, two monsters remaining. For some reason the woozy feeling was going away.
My heart was thundering in my ears, my breath coming out quickly as i stared at my last opponent. The last person I’d have to kill before all of this was over and I could just stop, at least stop for a moment.
The person who has killed me twice now, let’s make sure that two doesn’t become a three.
I charged and slashed, they didn’t block like the axe hunter, instead they parryied my strike. It was a move that had me entrapted the whole time, maybe it was the ape murder part of my brain but I couldn’t help but stare at the move even as punched me in the face.
Ducking under a slash and returning one of my own I just fought, I fought like i had no life of my own because realistically I didn’t. I could take risks in this fight that he could, I could get cut up and hurt unlike him, I could die unlike him and come back fine.
It was making me a reckless force and for now that was working in my favor. And when the moment struck, when the hunter messed up a parry, missed dodging one of my attacks when their parry failed, I slashed their chest.
Blood, more blood, blood that's made my heart skip a beat.
There was one final slash between this fight, one final slash and I would be done and all of this would be over. There wouldn’t be any more murderous hunters attacking things in the forest, no psychos that I would have to look over my shoulder for in fear.
This dream would be a little bit better.
So why can’t I do it, why can’t I bring myself to finish the goddamn job. Why can’t I just swing my sword a third time, take out a fourth life. I’ve done it three times now, though the first can be debated on, so how is the fourth time so hard?
Slash Cut Kill Slash Slash Kill Kill Cut Slash Kill Cut Slash Cut Kill Die Die Die DIE
I felt myself loosen, frustration and anger bleeding from me as I stared at the downed hunter, at the person who murdered me twice.
They took out a pellet, a blood red congealed pellet and with slow movements that made me wince, shoved it down their throat. There was a moment when nothing happened, a moment when I just stared at them trying to will myself to take the final strike onto them. Then something changed.
Hair erupted on them, a wolf like grin appearing on their shadowed face and they let go of their machite. They let their weapon go and traded them for a set of claws, of sharp blackened claws that made me wary.
They charged at me and I was on the defense, the battle between the two of us taking a drastic turn as I tried to keep up with the ferocity of the hunters attacks. As claws swiped at me and they used every bit of themselves as a weapon against me.
Kicks, punches, claws, their own freaking teeth.
I could already tell that I was going to lose, that my death count was going to rise by one by the end of this fight. I was going to lose.
I gritted my teeth and went on the attack, ignoring how I was getting more wounds then them from our clashes. How when I would cut them they would cut me twice, how I was accumulating more and more cuts than them.
How I was going to di-
The dog from earlier, the animal that I started this whole fight for. Seemingly out of nowhere decided to join in. Charging into the fight and tackling the hunter, it was a move that barely did anything and might have done more harm to the charger then the one who received it but it made them stop, it distracted them for a important second.
I slashed and my kill count got one higher.
Heavy pants, heavy breaths coming out of me as I felt the shadows reside, as I felt the world come back into view. Three dead bodys stood around me, an injured dog laid on the ground, it's every breath by the looks causing it to breath.
It was then that I noticed it, that I noticed a feeling inside of me grow. It grew larger and larger and it was because of the blood that was being drawn to me from the dead bodys. A crescent red substance that was moving out of them, through the grass and soil and to me before disappearing a inch away. It was a horrifying and memorable sight.
My sword once covered in redness was back to normal, not even a hint of a stain on it.
It was a horrifying sight, even more so when I realized that it felt amazing. I felt like I was on top of the world as the feeling grew bigger, it just sat there in the back of my mind, just sitting right under my skin causing me shudder.
I didn’t feel anything either, the woozy feeling, the cut on my arm, every wound I got from the class were gone now.
The Shepherd let out a tiny whimper and that drew me out of my thoughts, out of my stupor for committing the one action I really didn’t want to do, out of seemingly The moon hung over me, a pale thing that gazed hatefully at the world below it. I knelt next to the dog and tried to figure out any way I could help it.
I gazed at the hunters, maybe they had something on them. Something that can help them? They are hunters or something of the sort, they should have some sort of bandage or something.
They need to have something that could help them.
Nothing, I searched their bodys and I found nothing that could be used as a bandage. Nothing that could help them. All I did find were some vials filled with blood and two more of the blood pellets.
Nothing that I could use to help them.
I stared at the dog, the way that its breaths were slowly starting to fade away. It was weakening in strength and every moment that passed it was one second closer to death. The pellets felt heavy in my pocket, the way they were covered in bloody wrappings not helping the intense heat that seemingly came off of them.
When the hunter ate them they healed, they healed to full strength and fought me.
I know it’s risky, it’s stupid and will probably bite me in the back but they helped me. They prevented my death count from growing higher. If I get hurt from trying this well then it was worth the effort.
I took out one of the pellets and fed it to the dog, and they devoured it without any prompting. I got to work, the arrows slid out smoothly as they healed and with great trepidation I walked away.
They’re healing right now, the cuts and wounds they’ve sustanded going away as seconds passed.
If they go crazy or attack me for whatever reason, then I want to be as far away from them so I dont harm them because I don’t think I could hold back. I don’t think I could hold back anymore.. I could feel the tension in my body, the way that shadows danced along the edges of my vision as I waited to be attacked.
As I gripped my sword with an almost unholy feverishness, I continued forward.
The path towards the place, towards the moment when I knew where the doll wolf pointed me towards, was peaceful. Which was really jarring. I mean the whole hunter fight kinda upsetted the walk but besides that nothing happened.
That might be a good thing because I’m still freaking out over the fact that I killed three people just then, that I was so goddamn good at it. I messed up at moments, attacks that were too reckless or blocks that were not so effective. And the less said about my attempts to parry their moves the better.
But I was getting better throughout the fight, every moment I was learning and improving and it felt great. It was like when I played lacrosse and I scored a goal or when I pulled off a complicated move, the intense highs of when I pushed through my asthma.
I wanted to do it again, I wanted to fight and feel my blood rush.
The only good thing besides saving the dog was the fact that I figured that I still didn’t like killing, that I could deal with it was something I tried to not think about. Though the whole blood thing absorption is something that I’m still chewing over, or in other words silently freaking the heck out over.
Like does that work with everything here? If I killed them would that amount raise? I don’t even know what it’s used for but the murder ape part of me is begging for me to kill more things, to raise the amount higher and higher until the tension in my veins makes me want to burst.
What could it even be used for?
Those wonderings and thoughts though all stopped when I found myself in another clearing, except instead of the one I came from which was completely empty this one had a house in the middle. A currently on fire house, a house that had screaming coming from it. Screaming and laughter came from it.
For a long moment I just stood there, stunned by the sight of it.
What the heck dream? Where the hell did this come from, even by the standard of giant skull crushing snakes and homicidal humans this is slightly messed up. Like this went from a level of pants wetting horrifying to just plain old high level traumatizing.
I stood there just experiencing the smell, the sight, the heat coming from the house. It was horrifying and I couldn’t move.
The smell of burnt ash, of flesh and blood invaded me. I could smell the destruction, the death in the air and I wasn’t even that close to the house. I was only a few yards away, ten at most and everything right now was close to making me sick.
The heat was making me sweat, a burning heat that was nearly overwhelming me.
The screams from the on fire house got louder and I felt a splitting headache enter me. The shadows in the corners of my vision were going crazy, twisting and turning in unnatural ways, ways they haven’t done before.
Wait that's not right, they’ve always been like that. The only thing that was different is the fact that I could see them. I could see things now that I couldn’t have seen before.
I could feel the headache going away as the world became just a bit more clear, things becoming different from what they were before. I don’t know what just happened to me, why everything seems different but I couldn’t ponder on it just yet because something was coming out of the on fire house.
The forest was silent, as silent as you could get when screams were echoing in the background, as they stepped out. The flames parted for them as they exited the house with an aura of nonchalance.
They were female, that was the first thought I had as they came into full view. They had the shadowy unrecognizable face thing that the hunters had, the thing that pretty much clued me in on whether or not they were going to be friendly.
The second thought that entered was the fact that they looked my age, they looked young and like they’d still be in school like me. What was someone who was a teenager doing in this brutal messed up situation.
Why are they a manic, a maniac that probably set this house on fire causing those screams.
I hefted the sword, readying myself as I waited for them to move, to attack me.
For some reason though my hands were shaking, both hands on the handle of the sword were shaking. I face three of the hunters at the same time, I’ve gotten shot by an arrow and am still currently bleeding out slightly and for some reason I’m shaking.
Why the heck can’t I move!?
I didn’t even get a chance to defend myself before I felt my head being cut off, a knife in the woman's hand.
I woke up with a gasp.