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“This is a new opportunity for you, Ms. Johnson,” the judge said, looking down at her from the bench. “A young woman as bright as you shouldn’t be left to rot in a jail cell, which is most certainly where you’ll end up if you continue down this path.”
Daisy purposefully stared at the polished wood table, refusing to meet his eyes. The bastard thought he was being kind but really all he was doing was being a condescending prick--
“Did you hear me, Ms. Johnson?”
She gritted her teeth. Every instinct was screaming at her to make some clever quip, but she’d been on her own long enough to hone her sense of self preservation. This was not the time to crank up the heat. She lifted her gaze and met his eyes.
“Yes, sir. I understand perfectly.”
“Good,” he said as he banged his gavel and nodded his head, “then we have a deal.”
~*~
Daisy sighed as she took in the Student Union at Los Angeles City College.
She didn’t want to be here.
That was the only thought that kept circulating through her head. Having to stick around long enough to get her GED had been impossibly painful, but the terms had been that she needed to finish high school and find gainful employment. That meant sticking around long enough to get her Associates or at least some sort of certificate since UCLA and USC weren’t going to be letting her in with her paltry equivalency, so...
A bell rang out, signalling the end of classes for the hour. Students came streaming out of the union and onto the walkways, all of them hurrying to their next class. All of them so eager to do what they were supposed to, wanting to prove they were good little boys and girls…
She’d certainly never been counted among their ranks before, but she at least had to try.
She hitched her bag higher on her shoulder with another sigh and headed toward the doors. The sooner she got started, the sooner this would all be over.
~*~
She settled into a begrudging routine. Classes, court-approved on-campus job in the bookstore, then home to a shitty studio apartment that was just cheap enough to be covered by the rest of her wages. Rinse and repeat.
If it weren’t for the fact that she had managed to save enough money to start building her own set up again. Piece by piece, she put together her computer until she had a decent enough rig. Her P.O. gave her a knowing look when she spotted it and gave her a pat warning to be careful with how she spent her free time, but didn’t take it from her.
That was the first time Daisy realized that the older woman might not be as terrible as she’d initially assumed. Grabbing herself a drink from her fridge, she sat herself in front of her keyboard and got to work looking for the parts she needed for her next build.
~*~
One of the few advantages to working in the bookstore was that there was plenty of downtime. Even though she had to at least pretend she was stocking shelves or folding the same t-shirts, she could let her mind wander. Over her tasks for the week, which classes she could safely skip, which projects had to be prioritized. Thankfully, she had a few classes she truly enjoyed and she put them at the bottom of the list. It was the best way to keep her motivated to get everything done.
The free coffee didn’t hurt either. Plus, the people watching was always good.
Nervous kids fresh out of high school, gray-templed adults coming back to pick up a few refresher courses, burn outs. They all had to come to the bookstore at some point, and Daisy got a good look at them all. She observed them all with the same passive eyes and polite smile.
Except for him.
Daisy couldn’t say what it was, but he made it impossible to hold her tongue. He was too slight to be considered conventionally attractive but the fire in his eyes offset that. It goded her, too, kept her from holding her tongue when she knew she should. It happened as she was ringing out his purchases -- a few car magazines, a textbook on engine design, and Dante’s Inferno .
“Don’t tell me this is required reading for grease monkeys now,” she quipped, her lips curling upward in what she hoped was a playful manner.
Those dark eyes of his flashed, setting her nerves on edge. Daisy could feel his eyes rake over her and knew he was judging everything about her. From her beaning to the purple streaks in her hair and the mesh top she wore over her tank top, this man was taking the measure of her and found her wanting.
“I’m impressed you managed to take a break from reading Rupi Kaur long enough to know who Dante is,” he said as he pulled out his wallet and opened it. He took out a wad of cash, peeled several bills off it, and dropped it on the counter in front of her. “Keep the change. Buy yourself a copy of your own if you like.”
Daisy watched him exit with narrowed eyes, hoping he could feel the hole she was trying to burn into his back. If he did, he gave no indication, leaving her to ring up the purchase and make the change.
She used it to get herself a coffee and the copy of Clean Code she’d been eyeing for weeks.
Like she’d ever be caught dead reading poetry.
~*~
Daisy did her best to put him from her mind, but she couldn’t. His taunt kept ringing in her ears at the oddest of times, distracting her from the most basic of tasks. Even her coworkers noticed it, risking proverbial life and limb to ask her if anything was wrong. They were bright enough to stop asking after the first time she glared at them and left her to sulk in the back of the store.
More than anything, she was upset that he’d gotten to her like this.
Who was he after all? Some smirking, overgrown man-boy convinced he was better than her because he read an author who died in the 14th Century. Just like every other pretentious bastard walking around campus who thought they were something because they could fake an interest in something they were “supposed” to enjoy. If she saw him again, she’d enjoy wiping that smug grin off his face, that was for sure.
Or at least that’s what she told herself.
It was only in the quiet moments when she found herself entirely alone that she admitted the truth: she’d found him attractive. Daisy knew she had a type. Classically handsome features with a slightly damaged aura, haunting eyes and a quick wit. She’d hoped that her opening salvo would have gotten his attention and encouraged him to flirt, but instead she’d been shot down. Worse yet, he’d gotten a better shot in at her.
It made no sense, but it only made her want to know him even more. Not that she needed a boyfriend right now. She had enough going on between classes and her job and her P.O. on her ass. She didn’t need a smartass, handsome boyfriend making that even more complicated. A one night stand, though…
Daisy sighed, shook her head, and got back to her school work. That wasn’t a solution either, as much as she might want it to be.
~*~
“No, no, NO!”
Daisy slammed her palms against her steering wheel, her heart racing out of control as she stared at the white smoke billowing from beneath the hood of her van. She had no idea what had caused it, but she felt dread curl around and squeeze her stomach tight. There was no way this was going to be a small, easy repair to make. She couldn’t decide what she was feeling most, anger and frustration and fear winding through her in equal measure.
What she did know was that she wanted to cry. She hated crying.
It was pointless to cry over. It wasn’t like she hadn’t known the van was an ancient hunk of junk, but it was her ancient hunk of junk. It had been her only place where she’d felt safe after fleeing the system. Daisy knew that she couldn’t function without it, but she also couldn’t afford to fix it. And buying a new car was entirely out of the question.
She gave one more half-hearted slap at the steering wheeling and let her head fall forward against it. The only good thing about this was that the damn thing had broken down in the parking lot at school. They were likely the only lot in all of Los Angeles that charged by the day instead of the hour. At least she wouldn’t get totally screwed by that on top of everything.
Daisy sighed and reached to undo her seatbelt and heaved herself out of the van and into the parking lot. She had no earthly idea what she was doing but years of television had taught her to at least look under the hood. She’d just gotten it open when a voice startled her.
“Need some help?”
“Fuck!”
Daisy pulled her fingers clear just in time to avoid the heavy metal of the hood coming down on them and whirled to face the owner of the voice. Her belly dropped to her knees as she laid eyes on him. Her traitorous heart skipped a beat and she felt her belly flip pleasantly.
She had vastly underestimated how attractive he was in her memory of him.
“You,” he said, his expression going from cautiously friendly to closed in the blink of an eye. “Why am I not surprised?”
“Hey!” Daisy protested, her lips curling into a snarl. “I didn’t ask you to stop, so if you have somewhere else you need to be--”
“I’m not going to leave you stranded in a parking lot,” he said, cutting her off. “I was raised better than that.”
Daisy wasn’t sure what to say that wouldn’t make her sound like a massive asshole. So, for the first time in a long while, she kept her mouth shut and just watched as he worked. Part of her was utterly fascinated. She had no clue what he was doing but confidence was seeping from his every pore. She shifted her weight and leaned forward, trying to get a better view--
“I swear, if you stared any harder, I’d have a hole in my back.” He turned around and wiped his grimy hands on his black jeans. “You’re lucky. It’s just the coolant. It’s getting into your engine. It’s a relatively simple fix, although why you’d want to fix this hunk of junk, who knows?”
“Well, it’s my only earthly possession,” she said as he moved to slam the hood shut, “so I’m a little attached to it.”
He watched her, brown eyes dark and intense, before turning on the balls of his feet to go back to his own car. Daisy nearly let out a low whistle when she saw it, the low-riding, sleek lines of the machine calling even to a novice like her. He noticed her admiration, his smirk widening as he looked between the two.
“I get it. She’s all I’ve got, too.” He jerked open the driver’s door and slipped behind the wheel. “C’mon, get in,” he called through the open window. “Let’s go buy your parts.”
Daisy crossed her arms and popped her hip. Teasing him had blown up in her face once but despite knowing better, she couldn’t resist this time either.
“I don’t know,” she called out. “I was always taught not to get in cars with guys whose names I don’t know.”
He laughed, the sound loud and clear as a bell. She thought she loved it instantly, particularly the way it made his entire face light up. She did her best not to show it though, only arching a brow as she waited for his response.
“It’s Robbie,” he called back. “Robbie Reyes.”
~*~
And just like that, Daisy had a new friend.
It wasn’t quite what she’d been hoping for. She’d been hoping that he’d fix her car then maybe hop in the back of it with her, but this wasn’t bad either. Robbie had even taken the time to show her what he was doing as he put the innards of her van back in order, and taught her a few quick tricks for some of the problems she commonly faced. It had been a nice way to spend an afternoon, even with his teasing about her taste in cars, right down to the tiny taqueria he took her to not far off campus.
They gorged themselves on tacos and beer quizzing each other on their lives.
“Daisy?” he asked around a mouthful of pastor . “Really?”
She could practically watch the condescension drip off his lips as he said her name.
“It’s better than Mary Sue.”
She took a long pull off her Corona to keep from laughing at the face he pulled. She liked getting big reactions from him and she’d instinctively known that Mary Sue would get one from him.
“That has to be a joke.”
“That’s what I thought, but no.” She shook her head and reached for her own shrimp taco. “Apparently, the nuns at the orphanage thought the name my parents’ wanted wasn’t dignified enough, so Mary Sue it was.” She laughed along with him and took a large bite. “That’s how I first got into ha-- computers. I went looking for my parents to see if they were still out there. That’s how I found my name.”
“But not your parents?”
Robbie was good at that. He could read between the lines to hear all the things she wasn’t saying. Funnily enough, he was good at getting her to say more than she usually would, too.
“No. Dead. In a car accident. They’d left me with friends for a date night and…” Daisy trailed off and shrugged. “When they hadn’t been heard from two days later, they dropped me off at Catholic Charities and took off. Raising the kid of their dead friends wasn’t on the agenda, I guess.”
Silence fell over the table as they each fiddled with the barely-there wisps of napkins they’d been given to combat the grease dripping from the corn tortillas. Daisy had been just about ready to start counting each drop when Robbie’s voice broke through.
“I lost my parents when I was young, too. Only avoided the system thanks to my tío .”
The silence was painful, but there was a comradery to it that softened the sharp edges, making it possible to relax the slightest bit. Daisy watched him for a long beat and smiled. They were going to be just fine.
~*~
One dinner led to shared lunches on campus, to help with her car and free computer maintenance when his little brother accidentally downloaded something from a suspect site. It was easy, something Daisy had never experienced before, and it made her hesitant to push for more despite the way Robbie made goosebumps break out over her skin and the ache that sat low in her belly when he turned that megawatt smile on her.
The issue was that she had no idea if he felt the same way. She thought he might. There were moments, here and there. His hand lingering on hers as he showed her which bolt to tighten or leaning into her personal space as she showed him which keystrokes he needed to execute her more basic programs. The thrill of it was so sweet but not sweet enough that she was willing to give up what was even more important: her first real friend.
That was her only explanation for why she felt abject panic when he caught up with her between classes just before the end of the semester and tapped her on the arm as she hustled between classes.
“Hey, Daisy.”
He was wearing his usual smile and she felt her heart skip a beat before she got it together enough to answer him.
“Hi, Robbie. How are finals?”
“Finals?” He chuckled and shook his head. “No finals for me. All practical work for the autos program and my English class was only a paper.” He paused as he dodged another student who had his eyes buried in his phone screen and caught back up to her. “You?”
“I have three tests next week. The projects for my computer science classes are done, but my psych test is going to be the death of me.” She rolled her eyes and looked at him, pleased to see a sympathetic expression on his face. “But I’ll find a way through.”
“I’m sure you will,” Robbie said, “but what would you say to some help?”
Daisy slowed and looked at him, her brow arched in curiosity.
“I’m listening. Go on.”
“I was going to try making tamales tonight,” he explained. “Kind of a dry run for Christmas. I could use some help, if you wanted to come over.”
Daisy stared at him, fully aware that she was making things awkward but unable to get her tongue working. It was lying at the bottom of her mouth, heavy and useless as her mind raced on at a million miles a minute.
“I don’t know how to make tamales .”
She wanted to slap herself. That was the best response she could come up with? Idiot. Thankfully, Robbie laughed, loud and clear and Daisy felt herself relaxing.
“That’s okay. I barely know what I’m doing. It’s only thanks to Mrs. Martinez that I have any clue. She gave me very detailed directions.” They came to a stop outside her classroom and stepped to the side. “So what do you say? Come help me make tamales tonight? I’ll even feed you some.”
Her instinct was to shy away and deny him, her panic rising. He was inviting her over? He couldn’t mean that, at least not the way she was taking it. There was no way Robbie-- She met his eyes and saw the hope there, shadowed with the slightest bit of fear. Daisy couldn’t do that to him. She felt her lips pull upward as she nodded.
“Sure. I’d love to help you screw up tamales.”
The worry dropped away, leaving his eyes bright and as beautiful as she’d ever seen. Daisy knew she’d made the right choice.
“Great. Text me when you’re done for the day and I’ll meet you at my car. We’ll show all those abuelitas how it’s done.”
~*~
Daisy didn’t think it could be called a stunning success, but it wasn’t an unmitigated disaster, either. She had to admit that a good part of that was thanks to Mrs. Martinez, who had helped Robbie by bringing over two giant margarine containers of shredded pork and chicken for him to use, as well as two slightly smaller ones filled with homemade salsa. She’d even been kind enough to stick around and show them how to spread the masa over the soaked corn husk, layer the meat and salsa, fold it properly, and then stack it in the steamer basket.
Robbie thanked her profusely, but Daisy knew better. She caught the knowing looks the older woman cast between the two of them and made sure to be on her best behavior. The thought of being the subject of neighborhood gossip on her first trip to his home did not sit well with her and she was confident that by the time they bid the older woman good night that they’d given her nothing to share over her coffee the next morning.
Her absence left a momentary vacuum that found them feeling awkward, their focus on their hands as they focused on executing the steps that they’d been taught. The masa wasn’t as even and the parcels looked a little lumpy, but they got the hang of it. As they produced more and more, their conversation started to flow more freely until they were eventually giggling over silly jokes and excitement for the upcoming winter break.
“Thanks,” Robbie said as they stood at the kitchen sink washing the dishes they’d used. “For coming over and doing this. Doing this alone would not have been fun.”
“Well, I’m not here purely out of the goodness of my heart,” Daisy teased. “You are feeding me after all.” They lapsed into silence as he washed out one of the margarine containers, lulled by the gentle droning of the running tap. “But you’re welcome. I don’t know why you wanted to cook tonight, but I’m all in on delicious food. It absolutely beats instant ramen.”
“Gabe was asking,” he said. “He’d mentioned that we hadn’t had these in a while, being a house full of dudes, and I thought I’d surprise him.”
Daisy had learned him well enough to hear what he wasn’t saying. His uncle was hardly ever around, working every job he could to keep the household afloat. The random act of violence that had taken Robbie’s parents had also stolen his brother’s legs; medical bills weren’t cheap and neither was food. She leaned against his arm, momentarily stopping him in his work.
“He’s lucky to have you,” she murmured, her voice barely audible, “and so am I.”
She felt him lean his head on top of hers as he said, “I’m pretty lucky, too.”
A moment later, he nudged her, signalling that she needed to get back to work. They went back to what they’d been doing, working in companionable silence to get the kitchen back into shape.
~*~
“How about a movie?”
Those were the last words she remembered Robbie speaking before she settled onto the sofa next to him. Daisy had her doubts. It was late and she had a long ride back to her apartment, but she hadn’t wanted to go back to a cold, lonely studio apartment. Not when she was being invited to stay right here.
She could hardly pay attention to the move with the way her nerves were screaming at her. She was hyper aware of the way Robbie was pressed against her side, the warmth radiating off him made her belly flip pleasantly and it only intensified when he’d thrown a blanket over the both of them. She must have relaxed eventually, because otherwise she had no reasonable explanation for why she was waking up in the wee hours of the morning, wedged beneath Robbie’s arm as the television scrolled photos of different Netflix shows.
Daisy held still for a long moment as she assessed the situation. The first thing she noticed was the intimacy of it all. She could feel each one of Robbie’s shallow breaths, the way he’d curled his arm around her and the press of his fingers against her side. She tilted her chin upward and watched him as he dozed, his long, dark lashes standing out on his cheeks in the blue light of the television. He looked younger this way, much more carefree than he did while awake. Her gaze dropped to his mouth and she had the wild thought that it would be so easy to lean up and press her lips to his, but she stopped herself. If they kissed, she wanted them both fully aware of what was happening.
She looked at the TV again and sighed softly. She needed to get going or she’d never leave. Daisy carefully pushed the blanket down and shifted, only to feel Robbie’s fingers tighten on her waist. She looked back to find his eyes open, his expression carefully guarded.
“Sorry,” Daisy whispered. “I didn’t mean to wake you.”
“You were just going to sneak out on me?”
There was nothing teasing about his tone and she had the decency to look away briefly before answering.
“You looked peaceful. I thought you needed your sleep.”
“You could use some, too.” She felt the slight pressure of his arm tightening around her bringing her back to rest against him. “Plus, I think I sleep better when you’re here. Even on this ratty ass sofa.”
Something dangerously close to hope flared in Daisy’s chest and she found her eyes focused on his mouth once more.
“Robbie, I --”
Before she could finish her statement, he pulled her into a kiss. In all the moments she’d allowed herself to imagine this, she’d envisioned something much more heated, complete with roving hands and questing tongue. This was sweeter than she’d expected, almost hesitant in a way as though he were just as nervous as she was. That gave Daisy the courage to push further, leaning into his touch and letting her tongue skim over his lower lip. Robbie easily met the pressure of her lips and kept her dancing along a knife’s edge of pleasure until she was breathless and forced to pull away.
Chests heaving, they sat on his sofa with their foreheads pressed together, their breath mingling in the space between their mouths. When he’d recovered enough, Robbie broke the silence.
“Are you sure you don’t want to stay?”
Daisy didn’t have to think twice. She leaned in and pressed her mouth to his once more, answering him without speaking. There was no way she was going anywhere; for the first time in her life she was more than happy to stay right where she was.