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Roman set his menu down and leaned on the table, getting into Janus’ face. The happy bustle of the café around them matched Roman’s glowing expression.
“He named one after me.” He squealed happily. Janus raised an eyebrow and sighed,
“As if you didn’t have a big enough ego.” He muttered, glancing back down at his own menu.
It was true. Patton had named a cupcake on his menu “Roman’s Royal Cupcake” and it was a red velvet cake with fluffy marshmallow frosting, lightly toasted. Janus’ gaze trailed down the list and wasn’t surprised to see a few more names jump out at him; “Remus’ Mudpie Dessert”, “Remy’s Iced Dream”, “Janus’ Tea”, “Lo-Lo’s Jam Prints”, “Patton’s Cocoa Surprise”, and “Virgil’s Stormy Brew”. All of the descriptions were worded to match each person and Janus was surprised to find that, even without his name in front of it, the tea was exactly what appealed to him most. He looked up to see Remus cackling at his own namesake as Remy sauntered over. He plopped down on the empty seat next to Remus and pulled out his phone,
“Selfie time!” He chirped and stuck up two fingers. Remus paused to glare at the camera while Remy snapped the photo. He pulled himself upright again to examine the product. “That’s a keeper!” He announced. Janus sighed,
“Hello, Remy, how are classes?” The boy looked up at Janus and slipped his phone into his pocket,
“Oh, you know, college is college. Finals are finally over and I’m free for the summer!!” He threw his hands up in celebration. Roman chuckled,
“Fall semester is your last or second to last?” He asked, leaning to see around Remus who was attempting to lick the table. Janus slid a napkin in front of Remus’ face before his tongue could make contact. Remy redirected his attention to Roman,
“Yeah, next, next semester. I have a couple more than I’m done, done. Like, completely. Imma be a Queen with a degree!”
“Business, right?” Janus asked. Remy nodded,
“Pat-Pat already said he’d help me get started on my own place to sell the sweet bean-juice of the gods!”
“Of course I will, Kiddo!” The cheery voice of the proud owner was a welcomed sound to all of them. Patton had been busier than a bee with his little shop and they didn’t see him as often as they would like. It had been almost three years since they’d actually gotten to sit down and have some time together. There were no end to the texts, emails, pictures, and calls that were exchanged between the members of the little family.
“Padre!” Roman cheered, pulling the man into a tight hug.
“Hi, Ro-Ro!” He laughed before getting attacked by Remus and Remy. He giggled as Remus took a deep whiff of his hair,
“YOU SMELL LIKE SUGAR!” He screamed, trying to lick Patton’s face,
“Alright, Remus, settle down.” Janus chided carefully. Patton pulled Janus into a hug and settled down next to the agent.
“How are you guys doing?” He asked happily. Affirmations and updates were exchanged until a quiet settled on them. Their drinks and pastries were delivered and Patton’s praises were sang over their quality. Roman ordered an entire box of cupcakes to take home while Janus reminded him that he was supposed to be on a diet for a movie role. Remus promised to eat all the cupcakes for him and received a playful smack for it.
“Harder, Da-” Remy clamped a hand over Remus’ mouth and the remainder of what he was trying to say was lost to the world. Patton turned to Roman,
“So, when are the boys coming down?” Roman’s eyes spoke for him and the smile slowly faded from Patton’s face,
“Oh…” He whispered. Roman offered a sympathetic smile,
“They’re finally confident enough to try to spend a summer up there! I mean, Virgil has a job and Logan…Logan is taking so many classes. He’s really taking advantage of that full scholarship!” It was no surprise to any of them that Logan had climbed the educational ladder with alarming speed and graduated high school early. He’d gone on to receive full funding for school and he and Virgil had set their eyes on a school that was all the way in California. It had been a big, scary move but they had the support and motivation to achieve their dreams.
“I’m proud of them.” He stated with a smile, swiping tears from his eyes. “They’re so big now!” He laughed. Roman smiled down into his cocoa. Suddenly, a barista approached with a look on her face that screamed to all that she was officially done with humanity,
“Patton, hey, sorry to interrupt but there’s a couple of people over here who want to speak with the owner. Apparently, they have a complaint.” Patton sighed and got to his feet,
“No worries, I’ll be right there.” He turned to the others, “Excuse me, please.” He stepped away and followed the barista’s pointing finger.
Two individuals sat in the corner, buried behind textbooks and newspapers. It was evident that they were college students, probably cramming for their finals. Patton sighed again and painted a smile on before walking over,
“Hi, can I help you?” The first answered in a bored drawl, not even bothering to lower his book,
“Yes, the service here is terrible, I wanted to make a complaint.” Patton was slightly taken aback,
“Oh?” He asked, unsure how to continue,
“Indeed.” The second commented, lowering his newspaper and staring at Patton with impossibly wide brown eyes, “I was told that I would get a hug from my Dad and that hasn’t happened yet. Really terrible service.” Patton screamed as the textbook lowered and a sheepish looking Virgil joined in Logan’s laughter.
His boys! Patton lunged forward and caught them both in an awkward hug. They laughed and Patton wiped tears from his eyes. Virgil sniffed,
“Don’t do that! You’re gonna make me cry!” He stood and made his way around the table to hug Patton properly.
His boys had gotten so big! Virgil was tall enough to look Patton in the eye and had put on some weight and muscle. He still wore a hoodie despite it being summer and Florida and his hair was still as purple as Patton remembered. Logan was still shorter than his brother and remained slim and delicate in his build. His glasses still looked too big and slid down his nose when given the chance. His boys. They were surrounded by the rest of the family and everyone was talking at once. Roman grabbed them both, demanding to know how they got there. Logan laughed,
“Remy helped with that.” The drama queen shrugged,
“What can I say? I’m guilty as charged there.” Remus wrapped his arms around Logan and smiled,
“Still a Baby Birdie!” He giggled and Logan huffed.
They were dragged to the table and the whole story was told from the beginning. Happy chatter and bright eyes filled the room and lasted throughout the day. As night drew closer, it was decided that they would all go back to the Prince’s place and crash just like they had so many times before. Virgil’s cheeks ached from smiling and laughing and he leaned close to Patton, letting that feeling of everything being right once more wash over him. Logan smiled from Patton’s other side and pressed a kiss to his dad’s cheek. It was weird being home after so long but that’s exactly where he wanted to be in this moment. He took in the customers coming and going, the families that were far more normal than his but far less exciting, the couples, the singles, and all the in-betweens. He took in the smells and the lights and the little imperfections that made it as close to a comforting place as any home. His eyes wandered to the window where a butterfly alighted on the flowers outside. He smiled as he recognized the bright orange pattern of the monarch butterfly,
“Look, Steve,” he whispered, “I learned how to fly, too.”
As they all entered the familiar double doors and made their way to the sofa, it was like muscle memory kicked in. Virgil settled next to Patton, Patton pulled Logan to his other side. Remy flopped down on Virgil and Remus made his place on Janus’ lap who complained that he was getting too old for these antics. Roman started a movie and placed himself between Logan and Janus, taking in his family and smiling like a child on Christmas day. Everything was in its place and, while nothing is ever perfect, here everything was alright.
There is something comforting being in a group of people who are all broken to some degree. It’s like standing in a long, dark hallway. The light is visible on other side but reaching it alone seems impossible. There is something comforting about knowing that there are other people in the hallway. Some of them are ahead of you, lighting your way, ready to lead you forward. There are some behind you, looking to you for support and guidance. And then there is you. Standing your ground and ready to pull those behind you forward while being pulled by those ahead of you. Logan looked at his small collection of travelers and thought back on the adventures they’d had together. The Strands, the Plumbers, Mrs. Huff, the police officers, lawyers, the judge, the social workers, the tired looking bus driver, the old woman missing teeth, and maybe even Steve; were they all in the hallway too? Trying to get to that light that had fought for so long? Trying to achieve that golden trophy of peace and maybe, just maybe, a little slice of that wonderous thing called joy.
Logan only noticed the beeping as it got louder. It was coming somewhere off to his right and he frowned, turning his attention away from the others at the table and squinting off into the distance, trying to locate the source of the noise. He stood slowly, going unnoticed by the others who were listening to Virgil tell how he got stuck in a tree saving a cat. The beeping was growing louder and something about it made Logan uneasy. Maybe it was its undeniable rhythmic beat, maybe it was that it was steadily increasing in volume, or maybe it was that it was beginning to speed up inexplicably. Regardless, he shifted his focus back to the people around him, trying to ignore the growing anxiety in his chest. However, when he turned, he was alarmed to find that the sounds of his family were muffled and sounded far away. Was he having a panic attack?
With a shaking hand, he tried to check his pulse but found his arms somehow stuck to his sides. Virgil seemed to notice his plight at last and pushed his chair out, leaving the others still chatting together. He moved towards Logan slowly, just as the younger Storm was noticing that the edges of his vision began to blur,
“Hey,” Virgil smiled softly, “it’s okay.” Logan looked up at his brother in confusion.
“What?” He whispered. Virgil only reached out and placed a hand on his shoulder, trying to offer what comfort he could.
“It’s gonna be okay, Lo-Lo.” He whispered again, his voice coming out slightly choked and Logan noticed tears gathering in his brother’s eyes,
“Virgil?”
“Hey,” Virgil sniffed, pushing back his mess of purple hair, “we had fun. We got to do things together I never thought we would. We grew up together, how awesome is that?!” Tears fell openly now, “I…I never thought I would get this chance with you.” Logan blinked hard,
“What’s going on, Virgil?! You’re scaring me!” Logan felt quite young again and terror was blooming in his chest. Virgil furrowed his brow and tried to regain control,
“Just…you’ll be okay…I promise. No, you’re going to be amazing. Never give up on that. Promise me.” Logan stared at him until Virgil grabbed his other shoulder and held on tight, “Promise me!” Logan swallowed hard,
“I promise.” He whispered. Virgil released him and nodded a few times, sniffing,
“Good, good.” He cleared his throat, but the next words came out broken all the same, “I love you, Logan…goodbye.”
The beeping was the first thing Logan noticed when he opened his eyes. The beeping that was coming directly from his right. His eyes felt heavy as he struggled to keep them open. He could hardly see through the tiny slits he made with them. White glared at him everywhere. White and then a shadowy movement. Then a shout sounded. Then a hand rested on his forehead and the shouting continued. The sound of running feet came into he room and more hands were one him. He tried to move, tried to speak but he was so, so tired. He wanted to let his eyes fall shut but a familiar voice pulled him from the comforts of darkness,
“Oh, no, keep those eyes open for me, Logan. You can do it; I believe in you.” That was the voice of Mr. D, Logan knew it. He tried again to open his eyes, this time with more success.
The room around him was a bright white, filled with moving bodies and loud voices. The hands of so many people were touching him, trying to pull him back into the world. He noticed the smell next. It was sterile and clean but made him feel almost sick. His eyes located the covers on the fluorescent lights above him next. They were littered with monarch butterflies. His eyes sought the owner of Mr. D’s voice next and they alighted on a tall man in a white coat, pressing a stethoscope to his chest. His eyes were locked on Logan’s and, when he saw him make contact, he offered a soft smile.
“There you are, Logan, you’re alright. Do you know where you are?” Logan could only shake his head a little. The man’s eyes looked sympathetically at him, “You’re in Prince Hospital. I’m Dr. Janus, I’ve been taking care of you for a few months…do you remember what happened?” Again, Logan could only shake his head slightly, the doctor hesitated, “There was an accident…you left the Plumber’s home in search of your brother and got hit by a car. You’ve been in a coma for a few months.”
A wave of panic and sickness washed over the young boy. His whole world came to a crashing halt and then began to tumble past his ears. Tears filled his eyes and he let out a wail that filled the whole room. He sobbed and tried to struggle; his body still too weak to move. His voice, however, rose up with a plea that chilled the heart of everyone who heard it,
“Send me back! I want to go back! Send me back!” Dr. Janus pushed forward and laid gentle hands on Logan’s arms,
“Shhhh,” he muttered, “it’s alright now, you’re safe.” But Logan was inconsolable.
The torment of the young child continued all night and well into the next morning until Logan passed out from sheer exhaustion. When he stirred next, it was to the sound of horribly off-key whistling. He peeled his eyes open and they landed on a man with a bushy mustache cleaning the window in his room. The man swayed his hips and bounced a little to his own tune, unaware of the boy watching him,
“Who are you?” Logan finally asked, causing the man to whirl. The two stared at each other before the man offered a crooked smile and spoke,
“The name’s Remus, I clean stuff.” He gestured to the window, “Ta-da!” Logan swallowed,
“Uncle Remus?” He asked carefully. The man cocked his head to one side and let his smile widen,
“Not that I’m aware of but you can call me whatever you want, Little Birdie!” With that he turned and skipped out, leaving all of his cleaning supplies behind. Logan was about to call out after him when a soft knock came to his door,
“Knock, knock! What? Who’s there? Why, Patton and Roman of course!” The cheery voice belonged to a man in blue with a sweater tied around his shoulders. He laughed at his own joke as he pushed the door open and then stopped. “Well, I’ll be!” He cheered happily as a beaming smile broke out on his face, “Look at you finally awake! Look Roman, he’s awake!” The man turned and spoke to the large golden retriever that stood close to him. The dog wagged his tail happily, coming over and resting his head gently on Logan’s bed, looking up at him with soft sad eyes. This proved to be too much and Logan burst into tears.
Patton’s eyes widened in alarm as he came forward and sat down at the edge of the bed, only to have the boy struggling to get closer to him. Patton’s alarm grew but he quickly wrapped an arm around the distraught boy. He looked at his dog in confusion but the animal seemed to have some secret intuition that told him what was going on and he stared at the lad gravely.
“Hey,” Patton cooed, “what’s wrong, Kiddo?” Logan sobbed harder but managed to babble out some words that Patton could understand,
“You…Roman…*sob* h-home…I want to go home!” Patton rubbed the boy’s back soothingly,
“It’s okay, Buddy, I’m sure your family’s coming to see you!” To this Logan only shook his head,
“I want to go back!”
“What’s going on?” Patton turned his wide eyes on the nurse standing in the doorway,
“I’m not sure, Remy, he saw me and Roman and just started crying.” The nurse perched a hand on his hip and tilted his head before entering the room carefully,
“Hey, short stuff, what’s wrong, sweetie?” Logan took one look at Remy and began to wail again. Roman wagged his tail and put both paws on the bed, licking the tears of the distressed child.
“Calm down, Logan,” Patton soothed, “breath with me, okay?” He led the lad through several minutes of breathing exercises before he succeeded in getting Logan to calm down, but the boy wouldn’t let go of Patton’s arm. “Want to tell me what’s going on, Logan?” Patton offered a gentle smile that almost set Logan off again. He gritted his teeth and pressed his feelings down. Then, with Remy close by and Roman offering the occasional bark or whine, he told what he could of where he wanted to go back to. Patton listened in heartbroken silence. He pulled the boy closer when he dissolved further into sobs and looked over him at Remy. The nurse looked ready to cry himself as he cleared his throat. He shook his head slightly, before turning and walking out,
“I’ll be right back.” He called out to Patton over his shoulder. “I’m gonna go get the doc.”
Dr. Janus entered the room, looking hesitant to approach the sobbing boy. Patton was still working to comfort the lad while Roman sniffed the air. Janus made his way over to the bed and settled down, his movements weren’t cold intentionally but they held an air of unwavering professionalism that was less than welcoming.
“Logan,” he chided softly, “can’t you tell me what’s wrong?” The boy didn’t look his way. Janus sighed, “I’m a doctor, Logan, I want to help you, but I can’t if you don’t talk to me.” Remy approached with his hands deep in his pockets,
“Babe, I know you’re hurting right now and we want to make you hurt less. Please let us in, yeah?”
“Send me back.” Logan grit out between bitter tears, still tucked close to Patton.
“Back where, Kiddo?” Patton asked softly. Logan shook his head.
“Back to sleep. I hate it here.”
The look of sorrow that crossed all the adult’s faces was inexplicable. The depth of the words the child was lost on all of them. Even Patton held no comforting words he could impart on the broken boy. Roman alone sympathized with the boy as he whined softly. Logan turned away roughly, burying himself into the pillows, too tired to cry anymore. There was silence as the small collection of adults looked back and forth between themselves. No one had words worthy of the weight on the boy’s soul.
It wasn’t until the next day that the psychological help arrived. Dr. Picani was the best the hospital had but even he was perplexed by Logan’s strange requests to go back. He pressed the boy as far as he was comfortable but got nothing out of him. The empty look in Logan’s eyes told him more than anything else ever would. To put it simply, the lad had no will to live. The spark that should’ve been in every child’s eyes was extinguished with no sign that it would ever be rekindled. Every question was left unanswered and every attempt to reach him was futile. The boy did little in terms of recovering. Patton watched him day in and day out as the boy without a family continued to dwindle. It was like watching a cloud dissipate before the demanding rays of the sun. Pain wasn’t even something that could move the boy anymore. There was nothing left for him. Except that, maybe, just maybe, his brother was out there somewhere.
Logan’s face was scrunched in determination the next time Dr. Picani came to call. He was studying his fingers with intensity that was a welcome change from his lifeless mundanity. He looked up at the psychologist and pressed his lips together. One slim hand came up to adjust his glasses. The delicate nose sniffed, and the wide eyes shifted nervously.
“I wish to ask you something.”
“He wants to what?” Dr. Janus asked as he looked over his glasses at Dr. Picani.
“He asked if we could help find his brother.” The psychologist repeated. “It’s the first time he’s asked for something other than to ‘go back’ and I think it might be helpful if we tried to locate this kid.”
“Need I remind you that Virgil Storm has been missing for a few years?” Janus sighed as he set down his glasses, “He might not even be alive.” Picani’s shoulders dropped,
“I know it might not be good news.” He sighed, “I just thought we might try.”
“Well…” Janus trailed off hesitantly. “I suppose it never hurt to try. What do you have in mind?”
Social media was used to put Logan’s desperate plea out into the world. He cooperated in making short videos, posts, emails, pictures, and whatever else they could think of. It wasn’t an immediate success, of course, but a few weeks passed and Logan’s activity finally started to get noticed. People began to do their part in spreading the word and, much faster than Logan thought was possible, the group searching for his brother grew to a volume beyond his comprehension. Patton was greeted by a smile one day as he came into the hospital room,
“Well, lookie here!” He smiled as Roman trotted in, holding a paper bag in his mouth, “I didn’t know if you’d be up or not, Logan.” Logan’s smile faltered slightly at the use of his name instead of some nickname that he was used to Patton using.
“I have so many people looking for Virgil.” He said simply, looking down at the phone in his hands. It was a gift from Remy who insisted that he have it. Logan had tried again and again to refuse it, but the nurse wasn’t to be swayed from his decision. Patton plopped down on the bed next to him.
“Wow! You’ll find him in no time!” He couldn’t shake the feeling of uncertainty behind his words, though. There was no guarantee that Logan’s brother was every coming back. There was no certainty that the missing teen was still alive. He shook the unpleasant thought away but it came back immediately as he watched Logan scroll through his numerous posts again. “Logan.” He called softly. The boy didn’t look up,
“Hmmm?”
“I have a question for you.” Logan’s eyes locked onto Patton’s. The man smiled gently at him, “What are you going to do once you find Virgil?” Logan blinked at him,
“I don’t know. I have to find him first.” Patton nodded,
“Yeah, that makes sense.” It didn’t but Logan was a child, and, in his mind, that made sense. “I was just wondering if you…wanted to come live with me.” Logan stared at him.
“What?”
“Live with me. I’ve been talking with your social workers, and I want to start the adoption process if that’s okay with you.” Logan’s phone fell into his lap with a soft plop.
“You…want to adopt me?” He asked in breathless disbelief. Patton smiled, feeling his eyes fill with tears,
“Yeah, Kiddo.” He whispered, “I do.”
“But…what about Virgil?” Logan asked, mind still reeling.
“Well.” Patton ran a hand over his dog’s head, “If he shows up, I’ll try to adopt him too.” Logan hid his face against his hands, shoulders shaking as he cried silently,
“You really want me?” He finally gasped out. Patton wrapped his arms around the small lad,
“Of course I do, Logan! How could I not?!”
It was a long and difficult process to get the adoption through and Logan waited for Virgil to show up at any moment during it. He waited and waited and waited and waited, only to face disappointment each day. Days turned to weeks, weeks into months, and months into years. Logan was sitting on the front porch steps of his house, tossing the ball for Roman who never seemed to get tired of chasing it. The golden retriever’s coat shone in the late August sun, happily drooling all over the tennis ball in his mouth. Logan frowned in slight disgust as the dog dropped the ball in his lap. He picked it up gingerly and tossed it again. They were waiting for Patton to get home from a late meeting. The man was something more than a friend to Logan now but he still wasn’t comfortable calling him ‘dad’. It was funny, he thought, those dreams he’d had that were more vivid than many of his memories.
He’d been so happy there, so comfortable calling Patton his father, Roman his uncle and guardian, Remus his best friend, Remy his other older brother, Janus his motherly figure, and Virgil his everything. Now, with his eyes opened, Patton was his adopter, Roman his pet, Remus a stranger, Remy a nurse, Janus a doctor, and Virgil missing. So many things he’d once called his were his no more. He tossed the ball again, it bounced once, twice, and was snatched out of the air. Roman stumbled to a confused halt, staring at the stranger who was holding his soggy ball. Logan looked up sharply too, years of abuse kicking his instincts into high gear.
The young man before him was dressed head to toe in black. A hoodie made him look skinnier than he probably was and an old battered backpack was slung over one shoulder. His hair was a bright an unapologetic purple, the same shade that decorated his chipped and chewed fingernails. The stranger chucked the ball lightly and smirked as Roman caught it cleanly. The dog’s tail wagged lazily, indicating that he didn’t see this newcomer as a threat. Logan was leaning forward with careful curiosity as the boy turned to look at him. He had dark circles under his eyes, enhanced by the black eyeshadow that was caked beneath them.
“Logan Storm?” He asked. His voice was tired, like he’d been trapped in a nightmare for too long, “I’ve been looking for you.” He set down the bag, digging through it and pulling out a small square of paper. He stepped forward carefully, holding the paper out in front of him.
Logan squinted to see what was on it. The paper was a picture. It’d been folded many times and was falling apart in the middle. Dirty tape was clinging to the tears and frays, desperately trying to keep the two boys in the picture together. Logan gasped, eyes flying once more to the young man.
“Hey.” The older boy smiled, grunting as Logan threw himself into his arms. The paper fluttered to the ground, where Roman sniffed it curiously.
“Virgil.” Logan muttered, repeating the name over and over like a lost prayer. Virgil let his own arms wrap around the smaller boy, holding him close,
“Yeah, I’m here.” He nodded, “I’m home.”