Work Text:
The chime signaled someone at the entry of Captain Zzbut's stateroom. “Come!” he called.
The portal slid open and Navigator Nyga slithered in, zir's tail twitching in a manner that Zzbut knew signaled agitation among Alorians. “Why is there a simulated plant based life form located in recreational area twelve forward?” Nyga asked.
“Because I would not allow the humans to have an actual tree. Deceased coniferous plant matter quickly becomes a fire hazard if sufficient moisture is not maintained.” Zzbut was rather proud of the research he had done, even if much of it did leave him with more questions than answers. The flammability of trees, though, was fortunately clear.
The twitching increased. “But what is the purpose of this object?”
“It holds a significant role in an approaching human holiday,” Zzbut explained.
“Another holiday? Didn't they just have one with all of those strange foods? And one before that with pierced orange globes and non-regulation clothing?”
The Captain moved his upper appendages in an approximation of a shrug, something he had unconsciously picked up from human Anna. “Apparently they have several at this time of their solar cycle.” He wasn't about to mention Hanukkah, (which had gone mostly unnoticed by the non-human crew), or the upcoming Kwanzaa and New Year's. The only one Zzbut found concerning was New Year's, which according to Tobias was celebrated with small explosions and various intoxicants. Zzbut had no intention of participating. He had barely recovered from what they referred to as 'Thanksgiving'. The brussel sprouts had been delicious, but his intestinal system had been considerably less enthused.
“So this holiday simply consists of erecting an artificial...tree in the communal area?” Nyga's suspicions were obvious.
“Liu informs me that they will be decorating the tree. When they are finished, it will be wrapped in strings of colored lights, adorned with various baubles and have a number of packages placed beneath it, as one of the other traditions involves the exchange of gifts. I've seen holograms. It really should be quite pretty when they're finished.”
Nyga's tail curled around zir. Zir was still suspicious. “And that is the extent of this holiday?”
“Essentially.” That wasn't entirely the truth, but the remainder of what the Terran database had held was so odd that there was no way he was going to attempt to explain it to Nyga. There were conflicting stories of a human who was destined to become a religious icon being born in a primitive enclosure meant for animals, and tales of an obese elderly human in a red uniform distributing toys Earth-wide in a single night while using a flying vehicle pulled by hoofed creatures with no wings. The latter seemed particularly improbable, but the database insisted that the individual was tracked every year by Earth's defensive system.
“Very well,” Nyga answered, with some resignation. “I will endeavor to observe this tree once it is completed.” Zir turned to go.
“Oh, one more thing. I suggest that you do not hesitate while accessing the portal to twelve forward,” the Captain warned.
“Is there some danger?”'
That depends on what you consider danger. Zzbut kept that thought to himself, instead answering, “The humans have hung a piece of plant matter above the portal. I believe they identified it as mistletoe. According to Liu, kissing under the mistletoe is another holiday tradition.”
“What is this 'kissing'?” Nyga's eyes narrowed suspiciously.
“Contact between the oral orifices of two beings.”
Nyga's skin took on a pale blueish tone. “That's disgusting!”
Disgusting was a bit further than Zzbut was willing to go, although the idea of such contact did make him a bit uncomfortable. However, Nyga's reaction didn't surprise him. Alorians did not publicly display any sort of affection or mating behavior. It was unknown to outsiders how they reproduced and whether the species consisted of one or multiple sexes. “Just don't linger in the portal and they won't bother you.”
“You can be certain that I will not!”
00000
Entering twelve forward, the Captain was careful not to pause beneath the mistletoe. He was pleasantly surprised by what he found. The humans had done an impressive job of decorating. In addition to the tree, there were garlands of greenery draped above the viewports, with more lights and the oddly shaped bags Saba had referred to as 'stockings' hanging from them. Zzbut made it a point to check that the greenery was artificial. Fire aboard a spacecraft was never a good thing.
“You made it, Captain! Wonderful! I'm so happy you could come.” Marina bounced on her heels, facial muscles contorting to display her teeth in the manner that made most other species nervous, but indicated pleasure among humans.
“I'm not certain how long I'll be able to stay. There may be duties I need to attend.” One advantage of command was that 'duties' always provided a ready excuse to escape from any social function. When Zzbut had passed Marina on the way to mess earlier in the daycycle, she had invited him to an evening of caroling. He had nearly refused, but his curiosity had gotten the best of him.
“We're happy to have you for however long you can stay. We'll be starting soon.” She gestured toward a table at the side of the room. “If you're interested, there are refreshments. Cookies, hot chocolate and cider. Just help yourself.”
Zzbut crossed to the table. Cautious after his Thanksgiving experience, he selected several of the less elaborate 'cookies' and a vessel of hot brown liquid with an enticing aroma. He glanced around the room, noting the presence of a number of non-human crew members, including a group of Oihirians chittering together in the corner. Avoiding the overly social Oihirians, he found a seat near the portal from which he could easily slip away.
Soon after he was seated, the rest of the humans appeared. Tobias was dressed in red, and had seemingly both gained weight and sprouted a mass of facial hair since the end of his shift hours earlier. Several of the others wore long, tapered hats, and another wore a headband with protruding horns.
There were some songs that the universal translator seemed to have difficulty with--according to the translation one was about a being made from frozen precipitation that could run and play--but overall, the evening was pleasant. The hot chocolate was particularly enjoyable, and Zzbut refilled his vessel several times.
He hadn't actually intended to put in more than a token appearance, but the Captain was still there when the humans finished. “That concludes tonight's entertainment.” Marina announced, “Thank you all for coming, and don't forget, Christmas is tomorrow. If you'd like to be here to observe the opening of presents, we'll start at eight clicks, ship's time. If anyone would like to take some cookies to go, there are plenty left!”
Zzbut grabbed a number of cookies--this time being a bit more adventurous with his selections--and again refilled his hot chocolate before heading for his quarters.
00000
Shortly before eight clicks the following morning, Zzbut entered twelve forward. The recreational lounge was well occupied, with perhaps a score of crew members from a variety of species milling about or sampling the refreshments. The Captain wasn't particularly surprised at the turnout. He had had a number of requests to switch roster assignments so that those who wanted to attend could be off duty. However, he was somewhat surprised to see Nyga in attendance. The navigator, Zzbut noticed with some amusement, was staying well away from the portal.
Since there had thankfully been no unwanted after effects from the previous evening, Zzbut poured himself a serving of hot chocolate and wandered the room, examining the decorations. A number of small stockings had been added, seemingly one for each member of the crew, himself included.
He was going to inquire, but before he could, Tobias appeared and requested that those present take a seat. With a bit of shuffling, everyone was soon seated.
After some words of welcome, the humans began opening the decorated boxes that had been piled beneath the tree. Most of the gifts appeared thoughtful but not extravagant. Zzbut noted that Franziska was gifted a number of music recordings and Mosi received a supply of the special coffee blend he preferred.
After the majority of boxes were opened, Marina pulled a stack of flat, rectangular boxes from behind the tree. Each human received one, Marina included. Comments were made that the packages were addressed as coming from Santa.
As they were opened, it became apparent that each contained a brightly colored upper body outer covering. While similar, each featured a different pattern, some with decorative trees, others with small figures with pointed ears. The opening and display of each was met with increasing laughter from the assembled humans. Zzbut wasn't certain why. Perhaps because the ship was kept at a constant, comfortable to humans temperature, and the outer garments were unnecessary?
Packages opened, several of the humans disappeared for a few minutes, only to return wearing the outer garments they'd been given. Tobias was one of those. As he stepped to the front of the room, Zzbut observed that the pattern woven into his garment featured strings of lights much like those that decorated the tree.
“It seems,” Tobias began, “That Santa was here last night and left a little something for everyone. We'll make sure that those who aren't here this morning receive their items later.”
With that, the humans began passing out the small stockings that were hung around the room.
The Captain did not open his immediately, instead watching his crew members. Konsu, their Chaziri botanist, was gifted aTerran plant that Franziska called a succulent. The Oihirians each received a container of the small red dried fruit they had lauded at the Thanksgiving celebration. Nyga's gift was a selection of bands to control zir's hair, identical to those zir usually wore, just more colorful. Other crewmembers received similar items.
The Captain finally opened his own gift, and found a number of packets. He wasn't immediately sure what they contained, as the writing was in Terran.
Marina noticed his confusion. “It's hot chocolate,” she explained, displaying her teeth. “Just empty a packet into a cup, and add hot water. Santa noticed how much you enjoyed it last night.”
Zzbut knew there was no one aboard ship who went by that designation, and was certain that Marina knew it as well. However, it appeared that maintaining the fallacy was a part of the human's tradition. He wasn't going to argue with that. “Please thank Santa for me.”
“I will.”
Human holidays could actually be quite enjoyable, Zzbut decided. Just as long as they didn't involve brussel sprouts.