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Apollo Justice’s morning had been interesting, to say the least. He’d woken up to people carolling on his doorstep in mid-September, been caught in a flash mob, and had a pigeon steal his croissant, but by far the strangest thing to happen was walking into the agency and seeing Phoenix Wright doubled over in laughter with tears coming out of his eyes.
‘Mr… Mr. Wright?..’ Apollo said, somewhat scared, and about three seconds away from calling either the police or an exorcist.
‘Apollo! Holy crap, Apollo. You need to hear- need to hear about...about Trucy.’ Phoenix grinned, pulling Apollo onto the sofa.
Phoenix took a large breath and immediately burst out into giggles.
‘She- oh my gosh- Trucy came to me, and she went…she went, ‘It’s not a phase, Daddy! Ugh!’ and I... I lost it.’
‘A phase?’ Apollo asked, completely lost.
‘Wait, wait, let me explain.’ Phoenix went, trying to compose himself at least a little.
‘Okay. Okay. Okay! I think Trucy’s trying to go for that emo look now, which is fine, but ohmyword she doesn’t-she doesn’t have any makeup or anything that could be used for that, so she tried to improvise.’
‘Uh-huh.’
‘So she-she came into the lounge space, and I turned around to ask what she wanted for breakfast, and I see her, head-to-toe in absolutely nothing but black. Denim cardigan, t-shirt, skirt, shoes—all black. She was wearing these long black socks, and I think “Huh, I don’t remember getting her black socks?” Then this-this smell, almost like paint, hits me, and I realise that she’s used shoe polish to dye her socks black.
‘I go look up to ask her why she’s used shoe polish as dye, and her lips were completely coloured in black and she…she had the wonkiest goddamn ‘eyeliner’ I’ve ever seen and all around her eyes were completely smudged. I had to stop for a second to make sure she was my daughter and not some sort of super-raccoon.’
Phoenix abruptly burst out into laughter at this own joke, made eye contact with Apollo (who was incredibly concerned about his boss’ mental condition at this point) and immediately started to giggle.
‘I...I may have laughed at her. Maybe.’
‘You’re terrible, Mr. Wright.’
‘I know, I know. I’ll apologise. But she tells me “It’s not a phase, Daddy!” and turns around to stomp off, and I’m not– I’m not kidding, a black Sharpie and a pencil fall out of her pocket. She’d smudged around her eyes with the pencil graphite and done her ‘eyeliner’ and ‘lipstick’ with a permanent marker and I might have started laughing even harder.
‘She went to the bathroom to try and wash it off, or fix her eyeliner or something, and I’m telling you, she started BAWLING. So I…I go to the bathroom to see if she’s alright, and I see her kneeled over the sink with an old toothbrush, scrubbing at the marker like she’s trying to win a gold in the cleaning Olympics. We did get it off with some rubbing alcohol eventually, but I’m pretty sure Trucy hates me now.’ Phoenix finished with a sheepish grin.
‘That was…a lot to process.’ Apollo said slowly. ‘But I, uh. I might have some eyeliner I never used leftover— better than a Sharpie.’
Phoenix sat there, a wicked smile stretching across his face again.
‘Oh my gosh. Apollo… don’t tell me. You had an emo phase?’
‘No!’ Apollo shouted, knowing very well he’d had an emo phase. It’d gone on for a year, but he would never admit that. Never in a million years. Not even–
‘Apollo.’ Phoenix said, the most serious Apollo had ever seen him. ‘I will give you $100 right now if you have any pictures of you in your emo phase.’
‘No.’
He’d need to pay more than that.
‘$120.’
‘No!’
He wouldn’t be bribed. He wouldn’t.
‘Come on! Okay. $150 or nothing.’
That… was more than Apollo had expected. He’d pushed the memories of that year to the very back of his mind, never wanting the memories to resurface. But he did need that $150: he’d competed with Klavier in a drinking competition, but all he gained was the worst hangover of his life and money gone from his wallet.
He dropped his shoulders and sighed in defeat. He silently pulled out his phone, scrolled for a minute or so, and shamefully showed the screen to his boss.
The agency was silent for a few seconds, until for the third time this morning, Phoenix Wright cried tears of laughter.