Chapter Text
The way his father explained the situation would have probably made more sense if he had not started with, “You are to be wed within the week.” Wed? Wed? As in to be married? To whom? A Marquess’s son? Whom?? That certainly sounded absurd. He did not know any sons or daughters of any status who were not a part of the duchy directly. He was far too busy learning beside his father in order to take over one day. So when would he ever have had the time.
Unlike his younger siblings, he had been home educated by the finest instructors. He was polished so well, too well, he had become quite the recluse. He would turn down any invitations for balls or gatherings with the excuse of studying or preparing for taking over the dukedom. The only times were when his father would start to include him in head meetings or the rare occasion when royalty was involved and even then, the only person he really knew was the crown prince who understood his need to be away from others. The crown prince much preferred his brother’s attendance anyhow.
The crown prince and the Duke’s children were childhood friends which was only because his late mother was their mother’s childhood friend. The only other person he even considered was his personal guard Ser Terra. It was quite disappointing really. He could count his “friends” on two fingers. He did not mind though, it was easier for him to immerse himself in paperwork.
So to hear from his greying father that he was to wed, was just not what he wanted to hear this morning. “May I decline such a… gracious offer?” He mumbled, stirring his fork in his eggs absently. The look his father gave him was not the most reassuring of looks. In fact it looked a bit annoyed? His brother’s wide eyes bore into the side of his face but he ignored it for the moment, staring at his father in disbelief.
“We cannot. Marquess owes a debt, they are becoming a fallen house and this is the best they could offer for money.”
Heat flared up his neck, the twist of anger working slowly through his dwindling patience. They were selling their child for money? It was not something unheard of. It was just something he absolutely detested. Owing debts should be paid with the money you borrowed, not with whatever offspring you could pawn off. He opened his mouth to say something but his brother interjected before he could make the comment on his mind.
“Marquess Twilight is offering you a marriage for nobility? Oh it must be Ven’s older brother. Ven is the one i told you about Vani, the one i go to academy with-,” He cut his brother’s rambling off, slamming his fork down onto the table. He was drowning in a sea of uncomfortable anger and felt only a little guilty when his brother and sister jumped. His youngest sister piped in after his mother defused his father from the disrespectful action.
“To be w…wed! How romantic brother Vani, are you not excited?” Her big blue eyes were on him, wide like his brother’s but full of pure innocence. He bit down his crude thoughts, trying desperately to treat her more gently. She was still a young child, not even at her coming of age yet. Suddenly that thought filled him with so much relief he would have wept. It could have been her. If she had been of age it could have been her, and the thought twisted him further. He looked at his father with a hard look.
“It would be if I had ever met such a person. However, now I must wed a stranger within a week? I refuse. Father I refuse, Sora is already promised to the crown prince and Xion is too young. They will need to find another nobility to cover their debt with.” He barely could contain the disgust. His mother would not even look at him, her eyes had flitted to her daughter in concern. His father however began to glower at him.
“Vanitas Garten, last time I checked I am still the standing Duke of this household. You will do as I say. You are going to marry the eldest Twilight boy and you will not have a say otherwise.” His father’s word was final. It was not only in his tone, it was an order. He stood abruptly, knocking into the table as he threw down the napkin that had been in his lap onto his full plate. “You were not excused from the table Vanitas.” His father snapped. He felt the uncharacteristic sneer form on his face and he glared at his knight who decided in that moment to follow him out the room. He ignored his father’s shouts, heading straight for the refuge of his own study. Too much work to do.
“Married?! Can you believe this? To someone I have never met? Since when? He and mother were constantly going on about how they wanted us all to marry for love . What a jest.” He started into a tangent the moment Ser Terra closed the door to the study behind him. He paced by his desk, long strides and agonzing hair rakes. “What purpose does a sold person, husband or wife, stand for me? What love am I supposed to achieve from that?” What even was love? What affection was he to feel for another being? It certainly was not something like what he felt for Xion, his mother, or admittedly his brother Sora. He looked at his knight for assistance, though the man just stood by the door watching him with clear eyes. His silence was his answer, there was nothing he could truly say to relieve the young man and they both knew it. Irritation filled his features but he inhaled sharply, trying to reel in the unfair directed anger. He looked down at the stack of paperwork on his desk, deciding then to just forget the whole ordeal and drowned himself in his work instead.
“Brother Vani! Brother Vani…? Ser Terra, is brother okay?” The soft little voice by his head roused him from his unknowing slumber. When he opened an eye, his little sister’s face was up close to his and he started in surprise. She smiled at him warmly, and for a moment he absently adored the missing tooth she recently lost. He could not stop the warm smile he returned for her, and he swept her up onto his lap. He felt sore and noticed the lantern that had been lit and set on his desk, the outside already dark. He looked over at his knight with a deadpan look, though it was returned with a nonchalant shrug. Ser Terra’s face said, You were tired and you are heavy so I left you.
“Sweet shi, to what do I owe this pleasure so late into the evening?” He fought off the yawn as he asked, snuggling into his sister’s warmth and earning a gentle giggle from her.
“Well papa was noooot very pleased with you for missing lunch and supper. Brother Sora said you were.. B…bru…brooding? But I snuck you a snack, the head maid said I could.” His sister moved a bit in his grasp to gesture to a napkin bundled with bread, cheese, and cookies. He could not fight another smile and pressed his lips to the back of her head gently. He was grateful for her innocence and wished desperately that she would remain as gentle and pure as she was now. He would also not forget to give his brother a stern talking to when he had the chance.
“How very lucky I am to have such a lovely sister. Thank you dearly, would you care to join me in this snack? I can have Ser Terra bring you some warm milk.” He suggested, eyeing his knight who took the que before she could respond and started out the door on his errand. His sister looked up at him excitedly, moving off his lap to drag a smaller chair he had in the corner of the room for her to his tea table. He stood with a small chuckle, stretching his arms above his head before taking the bundle of goods to the table and settling in the chair across from her. She looked absolutely delighted for the evening treat and he felt the guilt from this morning.
After a few moments, Ser Terra came back with a tray. The knight set the warm cup of milk in front of Xion with a small plate, set a small plate in front of him as well following a tea cup he poured hot tea into for his young master. He nodded to Ser Terra with a pleased look and the knight stood off to the side, watching over the two silently. “Would you like these cookies Shi?” He asked, knowingly. His sister’s eyes widened with happiness and he settled the cookies onto her plate. “Just do not let your hand maid know I gave you sweets before bed… again.” He said with a wink.
“I will not brother Vani!” She was cheerful and took a sip from her cup. He watched her with a chuckle, reaching over with the leftover napkin to wipe the bit of milk from the side of her mouth. She giggled and then he watched a flicker of a sadness wave across her face. Concern filled his body, making him alert as she opened her mouth to talk. “Brother… Why were you and papa so mad about marriage.. th… this morning?” He winced. There was not an easy way to explain it to her right now. She was young, she did not need these worries and it made the guilt in the pit of his stomach stronger. She hesitantly nibbled on a cookie as her inquisitive eyes watched him.
“Well Shi…,” He felt himself hesitating as well, wondering if he should just try to explain. “Sometimes, Nobles are put in positions that are deemed… unsatisfactory … but they think there is no other way. Sometimes families feel they have to give up their children in order to save their statuses.” He saw his sister watching him, her eyes lowering to stare into her almost empty cup of milk. It made him ashamed, he should not have to explain this to her, he would never sell her off for any reason once he was the head Duke. She seemed to somewhat understand though.
“Are you leaving?” She sounded distraught. It had not occurred to him, but he assumed he would take over the northern fief his father owned until his father’s passing. He considered for a moment, but thought better than to tell her any of this right now.
“No, but the Marquess’s son will.” He muttered. His sister seemed to not understand his sudden bitterness, she flinched a bit. He frowned and looked at the crumbs on his plate instead of her.
“Do you think he will be sad too?” He heard her say. He looked up at her with a look of surprise. He had not even considered the other party. He only saw him as a sad sold off son but had not really thought about what he could be feeling right this moment. He felt a bit sore at himself for it. His sister was truly a lovely child, always thinking about others even when she did not understand the circumstances. This is why she was better than him, why he wanted to protect this purity for as long as possible.
“It is a possibility, though i do not know him so i cannot tell you truly how he feels.” He nodded to his knight who began to gather up the now empty plates and cups, and he cleared his throat while standing. “However, it is now bedtime for beloved sisters who need their precious sleep. Come, I will tuck you in for tonight.” He ruffled her long hair that matched his own midnight color, and smiled when she excitedly reached up for him. He lifted her into his arms and began for the door that his knight propped open for him.
When he got to her bedroom, he reassured her handmaid that he would help her into her sleepwear and got her settled into her bed. She took his hand in hers and held him captive, he knew what was coming. “Would you.. Sing for me? You have been too… bus.. busy lately to do it.” Her grip on him was like iron, like she was afraid he would disappear from her sight. He could read the anxiety in her ever since she had asked if he was leaving. He kissed her forehead gently, motioning with his free hand for the handmaid to leave.
“I will. I will even stay until you are asleep.” He murmured. The warmth that swirled in his chest when she smiled so wholly relaxed him. He stroked her hair with his free hand and began to sing softly of crying babes and crows with laughs so full; a lullaby his mother used to sing to him and Sora when they were her age and even smaller. When he finished, he stayed a while longer, lingering in the safety of his sister’s soft sleeping breaths.
After talking to the butler the next morning about just bringing meals separately to his study, the next few days were him just restlessly working to keep his mind off the inevitable. He locked out Ser Terra, the maids, and his family, to his sister’s dismay. It took a lot of willpower not to open the door for his sister, especially on the third day when she sat outside the door weeping and trying to get his attention until Sora finally moved her away. He hardly left to shower if at all, he hardly slept, and he powered through all the latest paperwork he had been putting off before.
On the fifth day, when his father had enough of "the nonsense", he heard the order for Ser Terra to take out the door. He looked up just in time to see the door splinter, breaking apart and watched the darkest scowl on his father's face. "You have done enough. Get washed, your betrothed will be here tonight, the wedding is tomorrow evening." Betrothed? Oh yes, he remembered hazily that he was to be wedded. Marriage. Dread filled his tired body as he shakily stood, forgetting the last time he properly ate and fainting just as his knight made it to his side to catch him.
When he came to, he was lying in his bed with something warm bundled into his side and his brother asleep in the chair beside his bed. He looked bemused, lifting a corner of the bundle to find his precious sister curled up and snoozing away like she had no care in the world. What on earth is wrong with me. It was not terribly unusual that he would barely have time for his younger siblings anymore, but even he knew the last five days were excessive. He should not have locked his siblings out at least. He reached out towards his younger brother and brushed a wild strand of brown away, causing the boy to stir.
"Brother…?" Sora murmured a bit loudly in his sleepiness. He put a finger to his lips to indicate being quiet and gestured to their sleeping sister with a small smile. "Ah, father has been furious. But… mother has been sad. I still do not understand why you are acting so…," Sora waved a hand at him but continued, "but I hope this young man will be someone you can learn to love, under the circumstances."
He watched his younger brother in his daze, and frowned to himself. He was trying to understand and for that he was grateful, however it just did not feel that simple. It was like a twisting of vines tangling in his stomach and around his heart. He reached out and ruffled his brother's hair, just as his door opened. Their mother came in, eyes clouded with remorse. She took in the scene with her babies, and sat at the end of the bed by his feet.
"My sweetest gifts. Oh how the years go by, and still you all are so small to me." He could see the battle in her, he knew she hated the idea as much as he did. There was no way she did not. For it was her who preached of love. It was the story of her and their father that she told each of them hundreds of times. And it was those stories that made this marriage so much harder on him and her both. Him because he still had no idea about love or people, and her because she was watching her eldest start a marriage without love. "Your father does not see, I am so sorry my baby." She touched his cheek gently, and it sent him back to a time when he was small, she would cradle him close to her and sing. He choked up and shifted uncomfortably, awaking his sister in the process.
"Brothers? Mama…?" Xion cooed, sluggishly leaning against his side as she tried to sit up. Their mother reached out to either end and brought all her children together, holding them squished up close to her. She feathered kisses on each child and smiled with wet eyes. He could not return her smile, instead he wiped her eyes with his thumbs and looked at the mound of family members cluttering his bed. His sister clung sleepily to one side of him, Sora had ended up bunched onto the bed arm wrapped around his other. His mother finally moved from the foot of the bed and to the window.
"Their carriage arrives my dears, I will greet them with your father. Sora, Xion, I will send your handmaids’ up to get you dressed. Vanitas, my love, will you… be coming down tonight?" His mother's voice was gentle. When she asked him, he felt cold and looked at the wall opposite his family. She let out a shaky breath and he heard her moving again before feeling fingers in his hair. Then she was out of the room to welcome the unwanted guests, the handmaids’ coming up moments later to gather up his siblings to get them cleaned up and dressed. It took a bit of coaxing once she was fully awake, but his sister finally left with their brother to get ready.
Once alone, he stared at his hands. He could feel himself trembling, could hear the front door open and boisterous foreign voices echoed up from downstairs. They were here. He was here. Betrothed. He felt ill. He stood and made for the door, locking it up and resting his forehead against the wood. What was he even doing hiding away? The best thing he could do was meet the one he was to marry. But he could barely stand the idea, how could he even face the other. He heard noises in the halls and he stepped away from the door quickly. They must be being shown their rooms.
He moved to the window, watched his father and some man he vaguely remembered seeing at a head meeting once or twice walk outside to talk. They both looked like they were putting on an act to please one another. Suddenly the idea of nobility made him feel even more ill. He caught a glimpse of his sister and brother running outside laughing while chasing a boy around Sora's age and two women watching after them, one being his mother. It was a perfect picture of a perfect family set up. Almost too perfect. The only thing missing was the betrothed in question.
He took a step back from the window and heard a knock on his door. When he opened the door it was a handmaid to start up the water for him to get cleaned up, "as per the Duke's orders" she had said as she moved past him to the bathroom. He let her, thinking a bath would help settle him. Once she got it ready, she let him know she would leave a clean pair of clothes laid out on his bed and left him to wash up.
Sitting in the bath water, his thoughts ran wild. What would he even do for this mystery betrothed? What if they absolutely despise him and his family for effectively paying for him like some kind of slave? What if he is in love with another and he has just stolen the poor Twilight son from his soulmate? I cannot do this after all. He stood from the bathtub, determination burning through him. As much as he loved his family, his duchy, he would just have to flee before their wedding.
He dried off rather lamely and got dressed in the outfit left out for him. It was a bit fancy for what he had planned, but maybe that would help during his time running away. He had read in a book once about someone using bed sheets, tying them together and draping them outside to escape a room. He heard the house bustling with sounds and laughter, they had all come back in from being outside. If he was going to escape, now was a better time than any. He quickly went to work on the bedsheets, making knots as fast as his exhausted hands would let him go. After what felt like an eternity and several mess ups, he checked the tightness of his makeshift rope and quietly opened up his window.
Thank goodness he was only on the second story, he was grateful. Though he assumed he was not truly fearful, he had trained under the Garten knights for years, this would be nothing. It was more so just an inconvenience… Right?
He fed the sheet rope out the window and listened again for a moment before moving to the window sill. He swung a leg over the ledge, gripping the bed sheet rope tightly in his hands. This was crazy, he was crazy, what was he thinking? He was supposed to be an heir to a dukedom. He would be running his own fief in the north to prove himself in the matter of months. Why was he suddenly going through such a rebellious phase? Was it because he had been so compliant ever since he was young and forced to start studying to take over? He released a low frustrated groan, looking down for a moment. Two stories… it would not be too detrimental if he fell, though that did not stop the sudden idea that he could make a mistake and what would his mother think finding him in a heap of broken bones. He tried not to look down too much, the idea making him lose his nerve a little bit.
Finally, with one last hard tug on the bed sheet rope to make sure it would hold, he curled himself out the window and gripped the rope tightly as he hesitantly made his descent down. This is not as bad as I initially thought. He thought to himself, just barely making it to half way. He was deep in a mantra of ‘donotfalldonotfall’ when a noise to his right caught his attention and he turned his head, surprised to see someone staring back at him with a mirrored expression a few windows away. Two eyes like bright sapphires stared at him, they looked extremely breathtaking if not a little tired and the owner of them watched him in awe before speaking.
“Um, this is not what it looks like, I just wanted to take a stroll by myself without anyone knowing.” Their voice was the soft kind that made you want to stop and listen to it for hours. What on earth am I thinking??? He shook his head carefully with a chuckle, knowing that excuse was a polite way of saying they were doing the same as he was. He wrapped the sheet tighter in his hand and carefully moved to the side closer to the other, making them flinch and fumble to hold their own bed sheet rope tighter.
“I am running, though I must say it is a rather humorous pleasure to meet in such a way.” He did not know how it was so easy to talk to this person dangling from the guest bedroom when he hardly could talk to anyone that was not family or part of the duchy; but here he was bravely leaning to look at them more clearly, feeling like he could have a conversation for hours right here. “Would you like to join me, since you were… ‘going for a stroll’ as you put it?” He smiled when he saw the burn of a flush snake up their neck to their cheeks and felt like he wanted to tease them more. “Unless of course you would rather hang there?” The other looked a bit affronted and turned their head for a moment, though he could swear he could see the start of a smile and something in him wished desperately that he could see it.
“I am Lord Roxas Twilight, I suppose we must keep to the manners we are raised with.” Those sapphires were turned back on him after a moment, a smile of their own giving him a flutter in the pit of his stomach. The young Lord was adorable, there was no other way around it. To talk of manners while they both hung out windows in their routes of escaping, it made laughter bubble up inside him.
“I am Lord Vanitas Garten, Lord Twilight, you never did answer my suggestion.” He smiled wide when he watched their face redden deeper, something in the way they flushed was beautiful. He wondered if this was supposedly how his father felt when he met his mother, and in the same thought wondered if this was the start of feeling affection . The other seemed to gnaw on their bottom lip in thought, it was an innocent action and yet it made him feel warm. He was starting to notice more of their features and it was not something he particularly wanted to do while hanging a story and a half away from the ground.
“Please just call me Roxas… Lord Garten, it could be nice if… you showed me the grounds i suppose.” They shifted uncomfortably and he could see their knuckles going whiter from the pressure of holding himself from falling.
“You as well, call me Vanitas. Let us get down now before we get more distracted and fall.” He laughed when the other looked relieved. He stayed close as they slowly finished their descent just in case the other needed aid at all and once they landed on their bottoms from a few feet away, they laughed to themselves lightly. “I do not think I will be trying that again any time soon.” He jested, earning a smile from the other.
“I can assure you, you will not be doing this again.” They both looked up in surprise, seeing Ser Terra and an anxious redheaded knight that stood beside him. Their eyes were on Roxas and he noticed the Twilight family emblem on his armor. He gave his own knight a sheepish smile and was returned with a grimace. He stood, reaching a hand down for the other to take and when Roxas laid their hand in his, he felt warmth as he helped them up.
“We were um, i am truly, i… it was… i,” The young lord started to panic, fumbling their words. He held the hand that was used to be helped up and squeezed it gently. The other laid those sapphires on him again and it would not be enough, certainly he was sure that those eyes needed to be on him always. He flinched at his own thoughts and could feel the heat most likely turning his ears scarlet.
“Relax Ser Terra, we were only planning for me to show the young lord around the grounds. If you would kindly keep this incident to yourself, I will be giving our guest a tour now.” His knight looked at him with a mildly amazed gaze, which only made the frustratingly noticeable scarlet flame his face. The other knight was watching his own master who seemed to release a soft hum in agreement which eased the Twilight knight. He released the hand he was holding, though he offered his arm up instead, a gesture to suggest escorting his guest affectionately. A gesture he managed to do subconsciously and before he could register what he had done he felt their arm hesitantly wrap under his to hold him. What on earth did I just do? He became very conscious of his own heartbeat and the heat of another being close to him.
“We will be a few steps behind you young masters, please enjoy your time.” The redheaded knight said, looking relieved like a parent watching their child growing happily. The two of them did not look at one another as they started off, he decided to take them to the training grounds of the knights first. The walk was awkwardly quiet, both of them very conscious of one another, both not knowing how to begin a conversation.
It was easier to start idle conversation once he began showing off the grounds. They started with the knights training grounds and quarters, which he had realized was a mistake once they all noticed their young master with a young lord on his arm and began to tease the two. It was all he could do to not snap and push the other from his arm out of embarrassment though he had been awed to see the laugh that came from them when the knights were teasing. They even made the comment, “You are well adored here.” Which had him brimming with pride and affection for his people. He did not miss however, the way they looked almost forlorn as they began to head to the next area. It was only for a second, then they noticed his eyes on their face and gave him a small smile of reassurance. It stung him a little bit, though he did not show it. How could he? They were effectively going to be taking this one away from everything they knew, their own people, he did not even know what relationships Roxas had, but he was becoming desperate to know.
The last place he showed as the sun began to set was a hidden away spot, a place he would go to for breaks or if his siblings wanted to have picnics. It was a beautiful place, surrounded by giant flourishing trees and right in the middle was a wide lake. It was a safe haven for the children of Garten, it was a place no guests were ever taken to. And it was so worth seeing how Roxas’s sapphire eyes widened and shimmered with a delight he had yet to see. It was beautiful, He was beautiful , and it left him with a small ache, watching the beautiful other as they excitedly started forward without him to see the water closer. He looked back, knowing that Ser Terra had kept the other knight and himself at the beginning of the treeline, and knowing that the man was probably a little surprised that he had brought a stranger to the place that was sacred to the family. It was sacred, though that was what made this all the more important. He did not want this person who made him feel so warm to be afraid or to ever see anything less than beautiful.
“This is a very remarkable lake, it is so clear and well kept. It must be a favorite among the guests the Duke hosts!” Roxas had chirped excitedly, looking over at him. He flushed and found himself averting his gaze out of reflex, a rather bad habit of his when around others. He forced himself to look back at them, he did not want to project that habit onto this person, not him. He walked over to where Roxas was kneeled at, and moved to sit next to them.
“No one but the children of Garten have ever stepped foot past the treelines. Other than mother of course. This is the lake the Duke had made for her after all.” He had said it was such affection, and had missed the softness in the other’s eyes as they watched him. He had been staring outward at the water, though when he turned to look back at them, he noticed the softness right away and felt the scarlet begin to prick at his ears with heat.
“How could I dare come here then?” The other said quietly. They started to stand but he found himself taking their arm and holding them there. They could see the silent plea in his gesture, and sighed before settling to sit beside him in defeat.
“I find myself also wondering why I decided to bring you here. I do not know, however I do know that I would gladly share anything with you. To which I find terrifying, for I have never felt this way before and I am not entirely sure what it is I am feeling.” He stated, noticing right away the words leaving his mouth but could not seem to stop them. Was that a confession? Did I make a mistake? He could not bear to see the expression on the other’s face so instead he changed the subject quickly. “Would you tell me about yourself? About your people?”
He heard the rather sharp intake of breath, and looked over to them. His eyes widened as he caught the look on their face, dread filled him almost immediately. They had a very pained expression, those sapphire eyes dimmed out and it was like suddenly they had become a doll. “My… people you say? You really…,” Their expression looked almost bitter, those sapphires still void of their light. It was hard to see, it was as if he had stepped on a land mine he had not known was there. How else was he to get to know this beautiful being though? They turned that bitter and sad gaze on him and he was taken aback by the envy that also seemed to dwell on the surface of that face. He could not stop himself from reaching up to brush fingers against their cheek, a sadness taking over him. Roxas in turn looked startled, flushing deeply with confusion clouding his face. “You really do not know? It must be true then, that you are a reclusive being.” It shocked him. Know? What on earth would I know?
“Regrettably, I know very little of your family. I did not even know i was to be wedded until this past week. What am I supposed to know about you that would hurt you so much?” He sounded apologetic, retracting his hand and absently rubbing the back of his neck. He cursed himself then, for never taking time to meet other nobles, for not trying to make friends, and for missing the opportunity to know Roxas sooner. The other seemed to pick up on the change in him, and found themself laughing softly. He watched them with confusion, but stiffened when their sapphires had softened again and looked at him with a kind of affection.
“I am almost grateful that you are reclusive then, Lord Vanitas.” He winced at the ‘lord’ remark but smiled a little. “There is… my family… My mother was a maid.” The words left him feeling cold. He watched the other, and they seemed to squirm under his gaze. “A lapse of judgement on the Marquess’s part. It was as he says, a mistake while the Marchioness was away. When it came out that my mother was pregnant… when I was born. They kept me, and the Marchioness fired every single maid and butler, bringing in new ones. Paid the knights to keep hush. My mother was thrown out right after I was taken from her body and she died a few years after.” The pain in their voice was strong. He felt sick, and then he felt overwhelming anger, though he tried to reign it in, he could tell they were not done. “I got to meet her once, she was beautiful. She was the most gentle woman I had ever met. She looked at me as though I was a light in her world, even though I was born from… something so awful for her.
The Marchioness does not like me, obviously. The maids, the knights who are not Ser Axel, they also do not like me. I am not very well adored, my brother was born some time later, and he loves me unconditionally but he does not know. It was put out that i am the Marchioness’s son, but everyone knows i am truly a bastard child.” They took a deep breath, he noticed the shake in it and hated himself for asking such a painful thing. “I am being sold, to save their family, but Ventus was always to be the heir. So it does not hurt them, they are happy to get rid of me.” He grabbed Roxas then, and pulled him tightly into an embrace. He felt the prick of tears forming in his eyes and felt disgusted that a family could push away a child just like that. He began to understand the forlorn look from before. Roxas had wished for affection from people who were supposed to love him, and he had never received that but once, from a woman no longer of this world. He could not imagine. For even without friendships, he still had a mother and father. Siblings who gave him unconditional love on a daily basis. He felt the shake in his arms, and held them closer, letting them cry.
“I will not let you be sold. You are not cattle, you are not just someone who can be sold off. I will not allow this. You will know love, our family will love you. I already… feel love for you. So I will protect you, and we will pay this debt, and the Marquess and Marchioness will not be able to see you ever again. I will protect that precious heart of yours, and I promise to make you happy, if you let me.” He murmured this into golden tufts of hair. He felt the body in his arms go stiff, and they drew back, their sapphire eyes searching his face. He began to replay in his head what he had said exactly, and the scarlet rush on his skin was too quick to stop. They began to laugh wetly, and a soft smile formed on his lips. He reached up to wipe away some tears, and retracted his hand in the same motion, his heart squeezing and his chest warm. Is this what it is, to fall in love?
“Brother Vani?” The two jumped at the sudden voice, and they looked to see his little sister holding Sora’s hand and they both looked surprised to find their brother with another in their secret place.
“Father was furious when you were not in your room, but we thought you might be out here brooding instead. Though… we figured alone . It is supper time.” Sora spoke, eyeing the other with curious eyes. He was relieved to see they were not mad that he had brought a stranger to their mother’s lake. Xion released their brother and bound for Roxas. As she got closer, her eyes widened a little and she turned to him with a look that surprised him. She stood in front of the other and put hands on her hips.
“Were you bullying Lor…young Lord Twilight?” She chided him as if it was him who made the other cry. And well, he technically had. Roxas however, gently patted his sister on the head and shook his head at her when she turned to him. “He did not? My brother can be…,” She looked toward Sora, trying to remember a word their brother had used before, “c…cal….callous?” He looked appalled, his eyes instantly on Sora, who was covering his mouth to keep back the snicker he was holding in. Roxas laughed aloud though, and he turned back to take in the expression the other had. It warmed him, and he kneeled down to tap his sister on the nose in retaliation. He scooped her up when he made to stand and she giggled joyfully.
“I am not callous. I also was not bullying Roxas, I was talking with him. We should be on our way back though. It is getting late and I have a feeling the Duke will have some words for me.” He smiled sheepishly, motioning for the other to follow. They came up beside him, and that made him feel more pleasure than he thought possible. Sora led the way, and once they got to the treeline on the other side, his mother stood with the knights. She glanced over with relief to see him, though in the same moment that looked turned to surprise, and then he felt the embarrassed flush when he saw the knowing affection in her eyes. The meaning behind bringing the young lord somewhere not even the Garten knights or staff have ever entered was much greater than Roxas would realize.
“Your father and the Marquess will be pleased to know you were just taking a stroll together.” His mother said, with a wink in their direction. He could sense the other stiffen beside him and he put his sister down, letting her run to their mother happily. He paused, and his mother saw the hesitation in him. “My sweet treasures, would you please guide our guest back to the duchy with our trusted Ser Terra, I would have a word with my eldest.” She ordered gently. Ser Terra nodded immediately, the knight, Ser Axel he presumed, following suit as Xion tugged on Roxas and Sora starting for their home. Roxas looked back at him with confusion and a mix of amusement and fear, and he gave back a small reassuring nod.
“To think… My son, finally bringing someone into his heart. What is on your mind my darling?” His mother asked when the others were finally out of earshot. She watched the torturous look morph his face, and held his face in concern. “What a face that is, what could be hurting you so badly?” She looked so distraught at her son’s turmoil and he leaned into her hands for some sort of emotional support. He began to tell her what he had heard from Roxas, the story of his mother, of how his step mother was cruel, how the staff and knights treated him. By the end, he had not realized he began to cry, but the tears were flowing freely. It was not something his mother had ever seen, it was rare for him to cry. The Garten children grew up only knowing love from their family and staff, even though the reclusive one was withdrawn into himself, he still knew love from his family. To imagine a family torturing one of their own, from someone who never went further than meetings with his own father with a bunch of older men and women, he did not know just how common it actually was in noble families. His mother held him against her tightly, and stroked his hair as he cried.
He could not tell what hurt more, the fact that a noble family would act this way, or the fact that this noble family was acting this way towards Roxas. If it was anyone else, would he still feel this way? Would he cry? Would it have hurt as much as it did knowing the first person he ever loved had no idea what it felt like to be loved everyday. “Why him? Of anyone… He is… such a gentle person… Why did he have to grow up that way? And how did it not absolutely destroy the goodness in him?” He cried out into his mother’s chest. He felt her hand in his hair pause, then felt the tips of her fingers lifting his face. She, too, was crying, a mirror image of himself. Her honey colored eyes reflecting his own, the midnight hair they shared. He was a male miniature of herself. And he saw it then, the heart she gave him. Her eyes began to reflect her anger and she moved him to arms length.
“That child is good because his mother is in his heart. As you and your siblings are good because of my own heart in you. Those despicable beings are not his family, they are not his heart. But, like the only memory of his mother being his heart, you also… I can see it in the way he looked at you earlier, the way you cry for him.” She wiped at his cheeks and looked determined. “You are becoming such a wonderful young man, my darling, what you decide, mama will always be on your side when it comes to love. Your father too.” She nodded in such confidence he was so close to believing it. His father? He highly doubted. But he was grateful for a mother as saintly as his own. “The Duke mentioned something to me before they came, the reason he accepted the eldest son.” He looked surprised, his father knew something? Then, why was he acting so furious and angry this whole time?
“Mother, do you trust me?” He asked after a moment of calming down and really thinking about everything. She looked at him with such adoration and nodded. He smiled at her, and lifted his arm up to escort her back to the duchy. She laughed and took his arm, patting it lovingly.
“I believe you are going to make a spectacular decision my darling, I can see it in your eyes.” She murmured beside him proudly. He could not stop the confidence that filled his body. “On another note… You brought someone to the lake. It makes me happy that they are such an adorable person you have chosen to share such a protected place with.” His mother laughed when he burned with embarrassment and stumbled a bit. He could not bring himself to look at her, though happiness bloomed inside of him at her acceptance. His beautiful mother was one of the most accepting beings in existence and he was very lucky for that.
When he and his mother met the butler at the entrance, the man gave him a lighthearted stern once over before guiding them to the dining area. His father looked as though he meant to scowl, though one look from his mother and the man was like a completely different creature. Ah, love is a scary and dangerous weapon it would seem. At the thought, his eyes met two sapphires that, to his dismay, already looked dull and exhausted. They had not taken that long, just what had happened to him before they arrived. He used this time to finally properly look at the rest of the Twilight family. The young Lord Ventus looked a year younger than his own brother. He moved on to the Marchioness and Marquess. The woman had lighter blue eyes that looked kind from a distance, but he could see the disdain when she glanced over at his betrothed. The prickles of anger on his skin made him aware and he reigned it back, it would be foolish to act out before getting his proper revenge. The Marquess was definitely a man he had seen in head meetings, boisterous and needy. Always trying to get on the good side of anyone with a higher title, including the King and Archduke. Fortunately, the only thing that man contributed to was the golden hair on Roxas’s head. Otherwise, they had no true resemblance. No, Ventus obviously took the brunt of the genes between the two horrid people.
“Excuse me for my tardiness. I was out giving the young Lord Twilight a tour of the grounds he is to be living on, and then was having a discussion with my mother. Shall we eat?” He said, taking the empty seat across from Roxas. The other’s eyes seemed to flicker with light and it made him feel a little relieved. His mother took the seat opposite his father on the other end of the table and the staff began to bring out the food.
“No, please, it is quite alright. Hopefully it was good company for you young Lord Vanitas.” The Marchioness said politely, though there seemed to be something behind the words she spoke. He subtly clenched his teeth, before smiling wide. Taking the other by surprise. The pleasure he felt from seeing the flush of red in those cheeks gave him confidence in his decision.
“Oh absolutely, it was a great pleasure in fact. I have had no better company than him in my life.” He said confidently, his eyes never leaving those sapphires. They widened and the flush became darker. He smiled, wanting to tease the young Lord more, but held back. The Marchioness seemed to choke a little on something she was drinking. His own father looked a bit surprised if not a little amused. His mother was hiding a smile behind a glass of wine, and his siblings seemed to blush with happy embarrassment at his openly flirty response. The Marquess on the other hand seemed to not catch on and laughed loudly, nodding toward Roxas.
“So you say! Good, good. Very glad he could catch your eye! Though you do not get out much, I am pleased this one is good enough for now!” The Marquess’s words were also a dagger at Roxas, a way to demean him. He saw this and as the words left the man’s mouth, he saw the Marchioness stiffen and discreetly nudge her husband. For now? What was that supposed to mean? Roxas’s face went white right away, and at the loss of the reddened cheek, he felt himself grow cold. The oblivious man had not seen the look on his father’s face, nor the appalled glare of his mother staring down at her plate like it had offended her.
“Ah, Marquess, may I ask what you mean by that?” He asked politely, though they all could hear the hardness in his tone. The man looked at him directly, a slimy grin on that disgusting face.
“I am sure your tutors and father have told you growing up of course. Even the royals take more than one wife. It is to preserve their lineage. This is to settle a debt, but you can find another or get rid of him when you find someone more suitable.” The Marquess spoke without a filter, the disrespect was incredible. As if because of selling his son off to be married to a Duke’s heir, he in turn was in higher status. The Marchioness paled next to her husband, unable to look up. He lost his appetite instantly. This man was insinuating that Roxas was not worthy of him, was suggesting that he would find someone else and cast the other away like he was some garbage. He watched the little light in his sapphires die out and Roxas became a doll again. He looked at his father who seemed to read his own mind. His father’s behavior was becoming what it usually was, not that weirdness from this past week, and the man rang a small bell beside him. The butler came into the room the next moment, standing beside his father.
“Butler, please take the younger children to their rooms.” His father ordered. Sora looked a bit uneasy, nudging Ventus to follow him as the Butler nodded with a bow. The Marquess and Marchioness looked puzzled as to why their youngest child was being sent to bed, though they seemed to remember their status and kept their mouths shut for the moment. His siblings gave their mother kisses as they left and she smiled at them before turning back to the adults now left present at the table.
“I think you forget yourself, Marquess Twilight. The Gartens are not a lowly family whom discard lovers when they find others. This is not the standard that the Duke and Duchess have shown us. It would behoove you to learn this immediately.” He began. His voice was dark. The Marquess was not expecting him to be the one to speak and it was evident he did not like the fact that the heir was speaking to him like this. “What ‘lapse of judgement’ you may have in your life, that is not something Gartens have. It is deplorable that you would even consider it even once.” The moment he said it, Roxas’s eyes widened. The Marchioness turned to the other with hate filled eyes and the Marquess looked as though he had been slapped. His own father looked curious at the reaction and turned to the man instead.
“What is this lapse of judgement my eldest speaks of?” His father asked. Roxas began to tremble, and they both took note of this. The Duke started to look frustrated, his father did not like to repeat himself. The man turned to Roxas and he could see it in his father’s eyes, the way they softened just slightly. “Young Lord Twilight, would you like to leave the room?” Roxas looked surprised, their eyes flickered to him and he smiled at his love reassuringly. Though instead they decided to shake their head and his father nodded with a faint smile. The Marquess seemed to sputter and find empty excuses. His mother was growing upset herself, he saw it in the way she worked her jaw. It was like the times when she would chide his father. The butler returned to the room at that moment, yet remained silent next to his father.
“Duke Garten, it is not something unheard of. It was misguided lust when I was still a young Marquess newly wedded. You understand, right? I am sure you have had such urges yourself.” The Marquess said, shamelessly. His father’s face darkened in a way that he had never seen before. His mother’s face mirrored it. The Marchioness stayed silent until then.
“My husband was seduced by a whore in maid’s clothing. That is all. So what. It happens to most nobles. We kept the child, we did not have to, but he is part of the Marquess so we did, why is that frowned upon?” Her voice was full of disdain, he could hardly believe they were saying these words, to the Duke of Garten of all people. He stood then, before his father could be outraged, before his mother could waste her precious breath on them. He stood and walked around, pulling Roxas up who had then began to cry. He moved them around to stand next to his mother.
“All of his stuff is here, yes?” He demanded with a leveled voice. The butler looked up at his young master and gave a nod. “Then I think our payment to you will be taking this young lord off your hands. What kind of people do you take the Gartens for, selling a child for money to better your nobility? I will court this young man at my leisure, and we will marry when the time is right. But he will be living here from now on. And the Marquess and Marchioness are to never step foot in the city of Garten or the Northern Fief of Dominion again. You are never to come into contact with my betrothed. Young Ventus Twilight is the only member of this family who will be allowed access to him.” His father looked proud, if not a little surprised. The Marquess and Marchioness looked shocked, turning to his father as if his words held no real weight. Their mistake was thinking his father did not agree with him. He turned to the one next to him, and laid a hand gently to their back. “Do you have anything you would like to say for the last time?”
Roxas turned his head up, staring directly at the two beings who were supposed to be his parents. “My mother was not a whore. She was an innocent maid who was taken at the lust and greed of a pig who could not keep his chastity in check while his wife was not around. He ruined her, threw her away, and before she died, She loved me with all her heart even though I was the product of her pain. I hate you. I hate both of you. I never want to see either of you in front of me again.” Roxas spoke through angry sobs, and it was effective. The Marquess looked stunned though the Marchioness looked as venomous as her soul.
“Just like that whore of a maid, you have sunk your seductive hooks into the Duke’s heir but you cannot order us around just because you have their favor, you little-,” The Marchioness was cut off when his mother slapped her across the face. His jaw dropped, he had never seen her hit someone before. He had not even seen her stand up and move, his own father was in shock as well. His mother looked like a force to be reckoned with. She turned on her heels and gently brought Roxas into her arms, before guiding him out with a glare towards the Duke.
“I believe my Duchess has spoken, though in not so many words. Butler, escort the Marquess and his wife to the guards by the gates and have them wait for a carriage home. I will send their youngest with a guard after breakfast tomorrow. Vanitas, join me in my office.” The Duke stood, and blatantly ignored the excuses and curses from the other two as he left the room. He turned to leave, but turned back at the door to give the two a glare of warning before leaving the room.
Out in the hallway, he exhaled deeply with relief. This must have been what his mother meant by his father taking his side. He held a hand to his chest and was relieved that the Marquess and Marchioness played right into his hand, revealing their true natures. He felt bad that it took being a little flirtatious and using Roxas’s expressions to elicit such opinions and reactions, though it was not out of false feelings. He truly adored every moment that those cheeks bloomed with such color. The way those sapphires widened, and sparkled with life and color. There was no doubt he was beginning to understand what love his mother wished for him. It felt so pure, and he did not need venomous people to poison that.
When he got to his father’s office. He knocked and was invited in promptly by the butler who excused himself when he was inside. The Duke was leaned up against his desk, arms crossed, those blue eyes narrowed and swimming with thoughts. He noted how much Sora looked like their father when he was thinking and it made him smile a little. When the Duke laid his eyes on him, his smile dropped and he straightened up unconsciously nervous. It was a while of this uncomfortable staring contest before his father finally spoke. “You did very well in there. I am proud of you.” He was surprised and somewhat bashful at the praise. It was something he was hoping for, though he had really thought he would be scolded instead. "How did you know? Where were the two of you before?" He took a moment to think about all that happened, from the escaping to the tour to the lake moment, and his chest warmed with affection.
"I brought him to the lake, and asked him about himself. That is when he told me." He spoke with adoration, and could not keep it from his tone. He watched his father's jaw drop and felt the burn of scarlet rushing up his neck to his ears. He knew why the Duke looked bewildered. He had been so uncharacteristically disobedient and against this marriage arrangement, for good reason of course ; yet here he was gushing and bringing the same young man who was his betrothed to a special and secret place his father had made for his mother. Out of Love . He averted his eyes, unable to extinguish the embarrassment making his skin burn. It was one thing for his mother to tease him, but the Duke was… well the Duke. His father generally was an affectionate man towards his family, but it was shown differently. Now he could not take the swell of affection, shock, and pride in his father’s eyes, it made him feel warm and uncomfortable.
“What would you like to do then. I will… annul this engagement, if you wish it.” The Duke murmured softly. The suggestion made his stomach sink and his head whipped up in dismay. His father was smiling at him, as though he already figured the answer but wanted to hear it from his eldest firsthand. He hesitated. This was what he originally wanted. He had never wanted to marry, he wanted to just… live as Duke until one of his siblings were old enough to take the mantle, or their offspring. Because his upbringing was different from how Sora or Xion’s are, he missed out on many cues needed for friendships. Of course this was of his own volition, he had chosen studying and reclusive behaviors because they were safer. They helped him, did not hurt him, he had his family, the duchy, and that was enough. At least, it was enough until two sapphires embedded themselves within his heart. It only took hours, but he knew… He just knew. This person was his, and he wondered if this was how his father felt when he met his mother.
“Keep the engagement. Though I would like to postpone the wedding. I want to give Roxas- ahem, the young Lord Twilight time to adjust here, and time to make his own decisions.” He said it softly, thinking about the golden haired being only a floor above him. His lips held a faint smile and his father was beaming at him. It brought back the embarrassment. “Oh, would you keep the Twilight knight Ser Axel here though? He is the only of the Marquess’s staff that has ever treated him properly.”
“I think that is a very good idea. I will send for his papers when we send the little lord off.” The Duke stood up straight and walked behind his desk, eyeing the different mounds of paperwork with amusement. He flinched, knowing that was all the paperwork he had recklessly exhausted himself over for distraction over the past few days and smiled sheepishly. “I will not keep you any longer for the night, though we will talk in greater detail with your… Roxas present tomorrow.” He burned at the possessive sounding way his father called his betrothed, the diminishing scarlet now back and reaching over the bridge of his nose. He was being teased and dismissed. His father laughed aloud and he grimaced at him before making quick for the door to escape before anymore was said. Before he closed the door behind him, he coughed uncomfortably.
“Thank you father. For… trusting and aiding me.” The Duke’s eyes widened a fraction. The man looked genuinely stunned and when he recovered, he smiled at his heir with an endearment mirroring his mother’s. He felt the flutter in his chest, the lightness, and shut the door promptly. I do not know which was more stressful, dealing with the Twilights, or just now with my father. He held a hand to his chest again, his heart pounding with a mix of affection and anxiety. There was a sound of crashing and laughter that followed it, reminding him of his guest. He found his way to the stairs, following the noises to a guest room.
The door was left ajar, and he could hear giggling from inside. It sounded much like his beloved sister. And then he heard her voice as if to confirm his suspicions. “Lord Roxas… you make Brother Vani happy, mother tell him so!” He was taken aback by the comment. He knew eavesdropping was wrong, but he was curious about what they were talking about.
“It is true love, the way he looked at you. I have never seen that look on my eldest ever.” His mother’s calming voice made him smile.
“You both are… so very kind. Though we just met, how could he possibly feel such things for…,” A timid voice trailed off, though somehow he could hear the intended ending of ‘ a lowly thing like me ’ and knew at once it was Roxas. His stomach twisted in knots, hatred flaring for the adults of the Twilight household.
“You are a beautiful child, we can all see that. There is nothing wrong with you, and it aches to know that you did not receive care as you deserved. No child should be without a mother.” His mother again, she sounded sore. He knew she was feeling just as angry at the couple as he was. His thoughts had been trailing off, though the next thing he heard caught his attention. “How do you feel about my eldest?” He leaned closer to the door, careful not to touch it but madly curious as to what the young man would say in response.
Before he could hear the answer though, he heard the sound of someone clearing their throat behind him. This caused him to flinch, knocking his head against the door jam with a curse as he turned to find the source. His younger brother and little Lord Ventus stood behind him holding a tray of goodies, Sora looking smug and mischievous. He flushed hard, the door behind him creaked fully open cautiously. “Oh, Van- Lord Vanitas.” The timid voice from behind made him wince, ignoring the face Sora was making at him. His skin had burned more times in this day than it had ever in his life. He found it hard to turn around.
When he finally did, he watched those sapphires flickering with life. They also widened, Roxas reaching up to touch his face. “Are you alright Vanitas?” He felt all cognitive reason fail him then. He did not dare breathe or move, and did not notice when the two younger boys had pushed past them. Instead he relished in the feeling of those warm fingers brushing against his forehead and took in the appearance of the golden young man in front of him. I did not realize he had so many freckles before, oh… how lovely they are . His eyes moved from their face to their clothing. They were wearing a loose light blue shirt, untucked as if they had been getting ready to turn in for the night. The way it was loosely bunched around their neck was both astoundingly beautiful and terribly alluring and he stumbled backwards at the intrusive thought. The scarlet took over, leaving no part of his face, ears, neck, or back unscathed. Roxas let his hand fall to his side, though they were watching him with a curious look. He had to force himself to look away or he would be captivated by those gemstones that seemed to hold emotions he was beginning to be familiar with in them.
Instead he looked behind his betrothed, catching the eyes of his mother and sister. One looked innocently delighted to see him, the other had a knowing smile teasing him within her eyes. He could not bear anymore teasing for the night. “You seem to be having quite the party. I just wanted to wish you a good night.” His voice cracked, though he coughed to cover it up. The other moved to look behind him, a blush dusting their cheeks.
“Would you like to join us? We were just going to indulge in cookies and milk.” Roxas had asked softly. The idea that his betrothed was taking part in cookies and milk was endearing, and he could not stop the smile of adoration from stretching his lips before giving his head a little shake.
“Unfortunately, I have been rather busy the past few days and need to catch up on rest.” Roxas started to look a bit dejected, but he quickly added, “How about you and I make plans for milk and cookies tomorrow by the lake?” Those sapphires blossomed with excitement, and in that moment he desperately wanted to kiss the other. It was a strong emotion, one he was unfamiliar with. It heated him from the inside out, love was a frightening emotion. He restrained himself though, smiling warmly as he took their hand and pressed his lips to their knuckles affectionately before taking a safe step back; leaving the other to stand in surprise, their face reddening by the second. It was a beautiful scene, one that would haunt him for the rest of the night. “Good night Roxas Twilight, I shall see you in the morning.” He decided it was best not to look in the room behind the other, or else he would risk the intense teasing his family had ready for him. So he bowed his head and turned to head for his room a couple doors down.
He was surprised when something grabbed hold of his arm, lips pressed to his cheek. “Tomorrow then!” Roxas said, a panic in their voice. You were the one to kiss me, how dare you panic so cutely afterwards . He held a hand to his cheek and watched the other practically stumbling to escape to his guest room, shutting the door behind him. A laugh bubbled out of him and his heart beat furiously as he managed to make his way to his own room.
After getting dressed into his nightwear, he sat on the edge of his bed and agonized over the events of the day. He noticed that the sheets were replaced and changed and chuckled at the thought. Meeting such a curious young man. A beautiful curious young man. One with wild golden hair, sapphire eyes, and a kindness that was undeserving of the world he had previously lived in. “Oh what am I going to do with you now that I have you?” He murmured, staring down at his hands. He did not know the first thing about being in love. It was not the same feeling of love like the feelings he had for his family or the duchy. He knew that immediately. He moved to lay back on his bed and stared at the ceiling, thinking endlessly about his betrothed until finally he fell asleep. His last conscious thought being the pleasurable realization that he would get to see those sapphires again in the morning.