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He stared at the ceiling in his darkened bedroom. Nervous. His thumb stroked over the knuckles of a warm hand having lain in his so long that he had stopped to consciously feel it. It was rare that his lover spent the night. And even more dangerous.
He turned his head to look at the window, his grip on the other man's hand tightening just as his chest tightened when he noticed the cracks becoming brighter.
"Rob" he whispered while he propped himself up on an elbow to look at the sleeping man. "Robert, wake up."
The other man turned grunting in his sleep.
"Hogan!“
An arm was thrown over him and pushed him back down on the mattress. "Not yet, Kommandant…" came the sleepy murmur before Hogan curled around him and nuzzled his neck.
Klink couldn't help but smile. It was their agreement not to use each other's first names regularly as to avoid them slipping into conversations with others. They were not supposed to be on a first names basis… let alone… this.
Klink sighed and tried to wriggle free of the man tightly wrapped around him. "Come on, Hogan, you have to get up. It’s almost daybreak." He had learned to despise summer for that. They already had so little time to be close… he would rather freeze than have the sun go up at four or five o'clock meaning no sneaking across the compound unseen long before roll call.
Propped up on his elbow again he combed his fingers through the thick black hair. Envious.
"Hogan, come on now, time to go to your own bunk." He urged softly but all he got out of it was another attempt of Hogan's to pull him close. "Hogan" he gently shook the other man now. "I'll have to put you into the cooler if you're seen on your way back!“ and worse, what would the American Colonel tell his men as to why he was sneaking around at night when they did not have a mission, why he was sneaking about without telling them.
It was among Klink's most pressing fears that the men in Hogan's operation could find out about them. With a bit of caution it was easy enough to hide from the guards or Schultz or Burkhalter as he himself was in control of all security measurements but Hogan was living so close to his team and someone was always on watch, things could always come up unexpectedly resulting in someone coming for their commanding officer…
Klink felt sick at the thought. Making it all the more incomprehensible to him how Hogan could sleep here like a baby without a worry in the world while he himself lay awake most of those rare nights waiting for the inevitable to happen.
One of these nights Hochstetter would barge into his room and that would be the end of it. The end of everything. It was better to lose a night of sleep so he could hear when a car came through the gates than to be shot for being a pervert and on top of that for fraternizing with the enemy…
Since Hogan made no move to comply and demonstratively kept his eyes shut, Klink sighed in resignation and settled back down, laying his head on the other man's shoulder. "You'll be the death of me…" he murmured breathing deep, he loved the smell of Hogan's aftershave… wherever he got that from in these times. "Literally"
Hogan's chest vibrated with a chuckle. "I view that as my personal privilege."
Klink shot up and ripped the blanket away from Hogan. "Elendige Bösschnauze! Raus mit dir, jetzt!“ he ordered loudly into the silence of his quarters but it was more affectionate than angry.
It was the bane of his existence that he never could be truly angry at Robert. ...especially not when he grinned at him with this mischievous sparkle in his eye.
"Five more minutes, Kommandant, bitte bitte."
Klink rolled his eyes but settled back into Hogan's open arms. Grumbling quietly as his lover's embrace tightened around him. "Why do you always have to give me a hard time, Hogan?"
"I don't know, maybe I just don't like your uniform."
He could hear the broad grin in Hogan's voice but wasn't willing to give in to the American's charm. "Your point is invalid, Colonel, I'm wearing a nightgown!“ He shot back trying to keep the amusement from his voice. Two could play this game.
Hogan broke into laughter "Touché!"
Satisfied with his retort he cuddled closer and neither of them spoke for a moment. But in the silence Klink's anxiety was just a breath away.
"You need to leave." He said quietly suddenly feeling an overwhelming sadness.
Why could it not be twenty years ago? He had gone on dates then, spent nights at other men's apartments and met lovers in dusky smoke-filled clubs. Those had been different times. People got away with things. Things that were unspeakable today.
"If you want me to leave, you'll have to let go." Hogan said gently, breaking through his dark thoughts.
He hadn't noticed how his fingers had tightened around Hogan's arms. Slightly embarrassed he let go and sat up.
"You ok?“
"Jaja…" he swung his feet out of bed and reached for his robe. "Just don't like to say goodbye."
"It's not forever." Hogan watched him curiously.
"It might be, if you don't get your ass moving." He said sharply, while tying his robe, more annoyed at his own sentimentality than at Hogan.
"Schon gut…"
He watched as Hogan put on his pants then went to the living room to check whether the coast was clear.
He slightly opened the front door, to have a good view across the main yard. All was quiet but the bright blue eastern sky illuminated the compound far too brightly for his taste.
“We took too long. I should have woken you earlier.” He said unhappily as he heard Hogan approach.
Hogan put his arms around him from behind and looked across his shoulder. “Don’t worry, Kommandant, the guards on the towers are usually fast asleep at this time.”
Klink slammed the door shut and jerked out of Hogan’s embrace to face him before he whisper-shouted angrily: “Keep your insolences to yourself! My guards are…” The reflex-defence died on his tongue when he realized that Hogan was probably right.
He gave a pained sigh. He had no idea how he would ever keep a prisoner here with these guys, should he actually need to.
"See you after roll call" Hogan smiled and pressed a quick kiss to his lips. "I think I'll have some complaints…"
Klink opened the door and shoved his lover outside. "Just be careful now or you'll tell your complaints to the cooler." He smiled as well, Hogan's lack of concern reassuring him.
He closed the door and spied through the curtains following Hogan's dark silhouette until he disappeared behind barracks 2.
With relief he let the curtains fall back into place and turned towards his bedroom. Maybe he could still catch two hours of sleep before roll call, now that he knew both of them were safe.