Archive of Our Own ^beta

[ Christmas Eve, 2019 ]

“Babe~”

“You’re still working? It’s almost midnight, Tae!”

“‘M sorry, Bogum, I just have to finish this chapter by the new years’. I’m sorry, I promise I’ll make it up to you tomorrow!”

“You say that every day! We skipped dinner with my family because of this, and now you won’t spend Christmas eve with me? Come out, see the decorations and food, at least!” 

“Come on, baby, I bet it’ll get you in a good, festive mood!”

“Gummie… I really need to—”

“Come on, up!”

“Hey!”

“Don’t shut my lappy like that! Let me at least save, god.”

“It’s just a chapter, please, it’s not like you can’t rewrite it.”

“Let’s go! Get drunk, get festive! It’s Christmas!”

“Yeah, whatever.”

“That’s the spirit!”  

[ Christmas Eve, 2020 ]

The click of the heavy, antique lock echoed in the silent evening. 

Taehyung turned the cool metal knob of the cabin, cringing as its door creaked with every movement.    

Behind him, spread the vast and open grounds on which stood the lone cottage, submerged under the thin sheet of the sky so blue it hurt his eyes.

On a distance, extended thick layers of Winter trees heavy with the scent of Earth; Red Cedars, tall and happy Junipers, Pines and swaying cypress, all of which were jeweled in Nature’s very own Christmas decorations, pine cones, some small, some big, some fallen on the path Taehyung had driven alone just minutes prior, halting his car on the side, and made his way up the wobbly wooden stairs to the cabin he had booked for a holiday get-away for him and his long term boyfriend, Bogum.

Or well, his ex-boyfriend now.

[ Last night ]

“Hey, babe?”

“Gummie?”

“You in here?”

“Gum?”

“Hey, um, hey Tae.”

“Bogum? Why’re you sitting like that…? Everything okay?” 

“What… What are those bags… ? Are you going somewhere?”

“Uh. Yeah, I’m… Shit. I don’t know how to do this.”

“Do… do what, babe…?”

“Tae, you— this— us… It’s not… it’s not working out…”

“Gum… Wh… what’re you saying... ?”

“We aren’t working out, Tae! You know we aren’t. We’re never together anymore! It’s like we’re in a— in a long distance relationship only we’re not! We’re here, but we’re never here!”

“You’re hardly ever there for me, we never hang out, you never go out with my friends, nor my family and I just— I’m just tired of feeling like I’m in a relationship with a ghost or something.”

“Oh.”

“I— I’m sorry if I made you feel like that… you- you know how I tend to drown myself in writing… I’m sorry if I neglected you, Bogum, I didn’t mean to—”

“It’s okay, Tae, it’s not your fault, it’s just who you are. And I’m just who I am… I knew we were different like this... I thought if— if we lived together we could make it right… at least spend some time together… but I was only pushing it.” 

“I’m sorry, too, Tae, you’re right, I know how much you worship your work, I’m sorry if I made you feel like I’m in your way of it… I’ve known and loved you for years, but somewhere I felt I couldn’t make you happy as your work did, and now I can’t… I just can’t keep going on like this. I need someone who needs me, who spends time with me, who makes time out of work for me.”

“I’m sorry.”

“Good luck with your book.”

“Thank you. I’m sorry.”

“Merry Christmas, Bogum, hope you find the one for you.”  

“Goodbye.” 

Taehyung turned the lights on.

An array of glittering stars and some little snowbell bulbs twinkled inside the place and on the huge, already decorated Christmas tree resting snugly in a far corner, illuminating the cabin with that incandescent holiday glow.

The air was cold but thick with a soothing aroma of worn-out wood, and shimmering underneath it were thin wisps of pixie dust smelling like Apple pie and cinnamon rolls that made Taehyung warm, so immensely warm inside. 

He kept his bag on the table by the window and walked up to the fireplace in the middle. On top of its brick ledge was a white note written in tiny handwriting. 

Taehyung kept the note back in its place, stunned in silence. That’s… too considerate, he thought as he waddled around.

The place was indeed spotless, infinitely cozy, and not to mention, the mouth-watering smells that were coming from the kitchen. So the landlady made all that. The sight of Apple pie and cinnamon rolls on the counter alone was enough to make him tear up. Taehyung made a mental note to thank Granny Song later. 

A whole forty-five cold minutes later, minutes in which Taehyung plopped himself on the carpet in front of the fireplace and put his focus on the manual that was lying on the wood, soaking up each word as to not die in the process of warming up the cabin, walking to the windows to leave them ajar like the kind note guy said, walking back and keeping the logs in the furnace with a few newspapers, lighting it afire with a matchstick, and viola! Taehyung finally managed to start a fire in one piece.

And soon, the small cabin, sparkling golden and red, came alive with fire that crackled slowly, rippling in time with the wind that had started to howl outside. 

And thus, sat Taehyung alone, warming his body in front of the furnace, munching on granny’s apple pie and sipping on hot cocoa. 

The blankets that had been neatly covering the bed now messily enveloped his body. A book lay open on the carpet, the good old romance novel, Gone with the wind. It was a holiday tradition, re-reading this one, yet it stayed neglected by his legs. His gaze was lost in the sparks raging by the second, reminding him of all the times his heart was emptied out. 

Envious, Taehyung was so envious of the fire that was burning passionately; all it took was a little matchstick. Taehyung? He couldn’t ignite something like this within himself even after 31 years of his life. A matchstick? He would like to have one for his soul too, for he couldn’t even hold on to the one good thing he had going on, the one person he thought he loved, would love, keep on loving for an eternity to come. 

Funny, he was a romance author. His pen name was a household name in South Korea, more than a dozen of his best selling titles rested on the shelves of the biggest bookstores right now as he sat slumped, wallowing in the death of a long term relationship… Or had it already ended long ago without him even paying attention?

The latter, it was the latter.

The sad part was, Taehyung had tried. He had tried to save their relationship, working himself to the bone to get the manuscript for his new novel up and ready before this year’s Christmas eve, because you know, there was this cute, intimate cabin he had found online for the surprise holiday getaway he had planned for his boyfriend… only to get broken up with in turn, on the very day he was going to reveal it. 

At least he tried, right?

Don’t they say that’s all that matters? 

Taehyung sighed, falling back on the carpet. 

Alcohol, now was the time to open up the bottles of alcohol he had brought on his way. Inebriating himself was the only way to get through his decision of staying here all alone for a few days, not having the courage, nor the heart to tell the landlady, who had gone through lengths to secure this place for him, to cancel his booking altogether. Who knew the holiday season was so popular amongst couples? 

Taehyung got up, gathering his blanket burrito, and dragged himself to the kitchen to make the strongest, most monstrous cocktail for Christmas eve.

Get drunk, get festive, Bogum would say.

Taehyung neither liked drunk, nor festive, but he could choose one tonight.

For the sake of poetic justice, only. 

The starry night lay heavy in front of his eyes.

Snow piled up on the road silently, glistening underneath the silver light of the moon, of the stars, of the pixie dust of the deep blue milky way. 

Jeongguk groaned, pulling over to the side. A furrow soon formed in between his brows and his heart began to thud restlessly. 

Not this. Anything but this, he thought, gripping the steering wheel so tightly green veins popped out. 

A sudden loud ring cut the warmth of the car, startling him for a brief second before he grabbed his phone from the dashboard.

Seeing the caller, Jungkook turned on the Bluetooth resting snug in his ears.

“Granny? Everything alright with the cabin? I cleaned the fireplace before leaving.”

“Oh, Jeonggukie, I saw the note. You don’t have to do that every time, son.” The melodic voice of the landlady flowed in his ears.

Jeongguk referred to her as granny, or rather she was the one who insisted he thought of her as a grandmother after years of using that place, on the same dates, the same time; December 22nd, 10:00 am to December 24th, 4: 00 pm. Jeongguk always went there alone and left before Christmas eve. It had been seven years. 

“I appreciate all your help, my son. But listen to me, I was just watching the news. They’re saying a snowstorm is going to hit soon. They’re already closing the highways into the city.”

Jeongguk groaned internally, eyeing the big and round snowflakes that kept piling on the windshield. They were falling so rapidly even the wiper couldn’t do its job. 

“I think it would be better if you went back to the cabin for the night.” Granny Song sounded worried.

“Isn’t someone already occupying it?” Jeongguk said mindlessly, looking around, hoping to find a way to cross the road that was already getting blocked. Something told him it wasn’t a good idea, something else told him otherwise.

“Yes, but I’m sure he’ll help you out. I can’t let you go home in this condition.”

When Jeongguk didn’t reply, granny’s voice filled his ears again, “Don’t worry, I’ll talk to Taehyungie! He’s such a lovely boy! He’s staying alone too, poor one booked it for him and his boyfriend, but he’s all alone on Christmas eve in that cabin…”

“You’re trying to get me to sympathize with a stranger, aren’t you?” Jeongguk chuckled.

Not just sympathize, if he had learned one thing about granny, it was that she never failed to set him up with strangers, whether he liked it or not.

Oh, well. At least they weren’t women.

It was more than enough that granny Song was this supportive of him, his sexuality. He shouldn’t be complaining, Jeongguk knew that very well.

“It’s settled! You’re not going home! Now I’ll call him and let him know about the change of plans, okay? Drive safely! Granny loves you a lot!”

Final, her word was final.

Jeongguk smiled. She was only looking out for him. He knew that, too. The last time something like this happened, it didn’t end very well. 

“Okay, I’ll head back. I love you too, granny.” 

He was about to hang up, tears burning behind his eyes, but granny’s voice rang in his ears again.

“Oh, and Merry Christmas, Jeonggukie. I know Haewonie is protecting you, especially during this time.” 

“Yeah. Thanks, granny. Merry Christmas. Stay safe,” Jeongguk’s voice broke, “please, stay safe.”

Jeongguk cut the call and took off his earpiece.

Turning the car off, he slowly let the cold envelop him, and soon, the white world blurred, and warm tears stained his face, plopping on his thighs one after another, taking over him as he crouched against the steering wheel, no thoughts of going anywhere in his mind.

Taehyung stirred awake. 

A nightmare, he felt like a breathing nightmare. 

His head was throbbing wildly, his mouth tasted bitter, extremely unpleasant, like the cocktail, or well, the many glasses of cocktail he had downed one after another last night. 

He swallowed thickly, scrunching his nose all the way up in disgust, getting reminded by the second his mind came alive, of just how deeply he despised alcohol.

But he couldn’t help it. Last night, once that dizziness, that inebriating haze kicked in, making reality seem such a happy place, he just could not help himself. 

Taehyung shuffled on the bed, making the sheets rustle softly.

The bed. The sheets. Bedsheets!

He was on the bed with the soft sheets… Huh … 

Taehyung had a very vague, floating chunk of a memory of falling asleep on the carpet, limbs all stretched out resembling a fluffy starfish.  

Yeah!

He did sleep on the floor!

Taehyung remembered laughing to himself because it was funny, he was so drunk he couldn’t even get up from the starfish position! 

And the bed was way colder than the floor, and the furnace was crackling so nicely and his warm world was spinning round and round and round and round. And he was laughing, he was, but his face was damp with tears, and his eyes hurt. He fell asleep on the floor… singing to himself the same song his father used to sing to his mother and him every night, and when after a cold, blue night his mother died, he kept singing it still, where’s my angel , his father kept singing and singing and oh, what a sad night it was, but what a beautiful song… what a beautifu—

Huh.  

Was he humming it still? 

No, he wasn’t, he wasn’t even breathing excessively in the fear of smelling his alcohol-infused breath… 

There’s someone inside the cabin? Humming the same song?

Pop’s ghost!?

But… pops is still alive , Taehyung talked to him just a few days ago, telling him how he wouldn’t be able to make it to Christmas eve dinner with him and Yuri, his stepmom, because he had this fantastic, absolutely magical and swoon-worthy trip planned for his boyfriend.

Wait, could it be… mom’s ghost!? A Christmas miracle!?

Taehyung shuffled on the bed, hesitating to get up and walk to the kitchen from where the sweet humming voice was coming from… but deciding it was time he got his Christmas miracle, Taehyung, as silently as he could manage, got up and trudged to the kitchen, a sway in his legs as his mind slipped under, refusing to shake the toxins away.

Freaking gin with freaking tequila and freaking tonic water and freaking him! Why did he even buy so many of those! 

Stumbling inside the kitchen door, the nostalgic aroma of an old town bakery hit him; of choco-chip pancakes, of coffee and of cinnamon. Everything about this mixture of scents flushed each drunken cell from his body. 

But what made Taehyung burn with tears was the man who was standing behind the counter, back facing Taehyung, humming the song only his father, mother, and he knew, and before he knew it, Taehyung was crying, sobbing, much like last night, drowning in the sorrow of being alone, being let go, in the regrets of not doing enough, not being enough, and in the uncertainties of a future Taehyung wouldn’t be able to have… of love, of devotion, because, “It’s just who you are, Taehyung, you worship your work.” 

This man was a dream. A dream he couldn’t have. He would turn around and as soon as Taehyung would recognize him to be Bogum, he would disappear in thin air, bags filled with his belongings by his side, leaving half the apartment empty because Taehyung worshipped his work, because Bogum was only pushing it, his life with Taehyung in their home that they had built together from nothing. 

And then— then there was this feeling— this intense and alarming feeling that he had grown so old, so wrinkly, come so far from his childhood when his parents took care of his ouchies and he didn’t even have to cry for himself. Where had that simple time gone? Suddenly, Taehyung missed his family so, so much. 

His wails filled the cabin, and the humming stopped abruptly. Instead, the frantic shuffling of metalware was heard before the pitter patter of feet came nearer.

“Oh my god, I’m— I’m so sorry, I didn’t— oh my god, what do I do— what do I do—”

From the misty gaps in between his fingers covering his face, Taehyung made out a fluffy black head scrambling all over.

The strange man disappeared from his eyes. The dream was finally over.

Taehyung’s cries became soft hiccups. Rubbing his eyes, he waddled to the kitchen counter, plopping on the wobbly wooden stool. 

“Um… are— are you okay now?” 

Taehyung gaped at the man who reappeared, this time with a glass of water in his hands. 

So… it wasn’t a dream? Was this really his Christmas miracle!?

That’s right, m’Christmas miracle! The Gods know I deserve one! They sent this beautiful honey syrup voiced angel to me!!!!! And it's a man!!!!! Sweet heavens, blessed be the gays!!!! 

“Hello, m’name’s Taehyung,” he slurred in between the stutters of his chest, “thank you for coming to me.” Taehyung took the glass from his angel’s hand and gulped the water down in one go, instantly feeling his mouth become brand new.

“You’re my angel, aren’t you? I know, I know,” Taehyung sniffled, voice now softer and without any quiver. 

“I’m— I’m your what!?” The angel asked, baffled.

“Angel. Christmas angel? Like… in the movies?” Taehyung hushed, an innocent tilt in his head.

“I—” 

“Huh?”

“Christmas miracle, you know? I thought it was a dream, but you’re back and you’re giving me water, thank you, and you were humming m’song, my pop sang it to me, where’s my angel ,” Taehyung sang the part, “I was his angel! It was me! ” 

“And then I wasn’t!” 

What was he going on about? If only Taehyung knew. He was still bitter about his father getting remarried in freaking Vegas! Vegas! Why would he get married in Vegas without telling me! His son, his angel! It was a drunken, one-night decision, but he didn’t tell him! God knows how much Taehyung was waiting for his father to get married to Yuri, he had everything planned, too! The flowers, the tux, the band, oh , Taehyung was starting to shake with anger.

“Um… are— are you okay?”

“No,” Taehyung sighed.

“You— you were singing it… in the kitchen… making food…” Taehyung mumbled, mouth watering at the sight of pancakes on the counter.

“‘M so hungry…” His stomach grumbled. 

“Gummie didn’t even cook for me… h-how— how could we go on? Was it entirely my fault!? I was lonely too! I was... ”  Sniffling, he eyed the pancakes longingly. “... Choco-chip pancakes…” 

“Would… you like to have some?” The angel asked carefully, “I figured you’d want something nice, you drank too much. There’s porridge in the fridge too if you don’t eat solid food after drinking.”

Oh, god , Taehyung was going to bawl again, it had been such a long time since he had awakened to someone making freaking breakfast … different varieties of breakfast, with Cinnamon coffee too, how nostalgic was this.

His head might have been a plumpy mush, but Taehyung was just… he was just a little sad.  

“Oh my god! What did I do now!?” The stranger angel with the beautiful honey syrup voice became frantic again, a worried look etched on his face.

“Nothing, you’re too nice, angel,” Taehyung sniffled, tears plopping rapidly, “too nice.” 

It had been a long time since he had felt this nice. Maybe it was his fault. He was a ghost after all. 

“Um, listen. I’m not… uh… I’m…” 

“Okay, I never thought a day would come where I’d have to tell someone explicitly that I’m human, but here we are, I guess?”

Taehyung looked up, face sticky with tears, but he still stuffed his mouth with big bites of the heavenly pancake, they were just so so s o , s o f t , his tears could wait till later.  

“You’re not m’angel? Why’re ya cooking for me in the morning?” he mumbled with a mouthful. 

“Is it good?” The stranger who wasn’t an angel asked, elbows propped up on the counter. Liar, what a liar, he was smiling like one, how couldn’t he be an angel with a smile that blinding. 

“Yum!” Taehyung beamed after gulping the pancake, along with his accusations, down with a big sip of coffee. 

Yum!!!! Just like momma used to make!!!!

“Yay, I’m glad.” The stranger giggled. 

“Who are you?” Taehyung suddenly asked, he couldn’t keep on addressing him as ‘the stranger’ in his head. And come to think of it… Who is he… if he’s not my Christmas miracle …? 

But wait… wait a minute. This isn’t a movie… it’s reality! 

He could be having breakfast with an awfully good-looking serial kille—

Oh, Holy Mother of Jesus.

Taehyung jumped from the stool, making a loud scraping noise. If this were to be a movie, it was one of those… those vintage holiday ones that started all cozily but turned into a slasher horror, wasn’t it? 

“Oh my god…” Taehyung gasped as he backed away, stumbling out of the kitchen and into the main hall of the cabin. 

Wait…  

 “The cabin…”

The cabin!  

“In the woods…” 

He was in a cabin in the woods with an awfully good-looking serial killer angel slash non-angel with a beautiful voice like honey syrup—

Oh, this would make a great plot twist for a novel Taehyung wouldn’t be alive to write.

“Uh, what’s happening in that head of yours now?” The stranger followed him. 

“Are you a killer? Don’t lie to me, okay!? I can smell lies!” Taehyung took a defensive stance, karate chops for hands. He didn’t do Karate for shit, but the killer non-angel didn’t know that! 

“Oh my god,” Taehyung breathed out, karate chops all forgotten as he eyed the fireplace that was still burning, firewood scattered on the floor; it was lesser than the amount Taehyung remembered last.

Two things came to his mind: 

“I bet you’re the landlady who chopped that wood. Oh god, what else do you chop— NO— DO NOT TELL ME!” 

Either that, or this stranger had stayed awake all night, keeping the fire and the warmth alive as Taehyung snored through his dreams, adding more firewood into the furnace, one after another.

Taehyung wished it was neither of those. 

“Please don’t kill me,” he sobbed, “I wanna see the rebirth of Iron Man and at least one shooting star before I go from this world.”

“I… am so lost right now.” The man gawked at him with perplexed eyes. He exhaled deeply, scratching his neck before facing Taehyung who was still faking loud sobs. 

“I’ll apologize. I’m sorry, really. I’ve caused you nothing but distress since the morning.”

Oh.

Taehyung stopped his Oscar-worthy acting at that genuinely guilty sounding apology. The man looked kinda… sad, too. Taehyung knew sincerity when he saw it in people. He usually trusted it too.  

“My name’s Jeongguk. I was the one who stayed here before you,” the man, Jeongguk, said. 

Jeongguk… Jeon… Jeonggukie! 

The kind note guy who told him to open the windows and saved his ass from dying from inhaling all that carbon monoxide! Taehyung gaped at Jeongguk in awe, his life savior.

“I was on my way back home when the snowstorm hit.” He pointed towards the window.

Taehyung followed his find and saw white, only white. 

“And yeah, it started snowing, like… heavily, and the roads to the city got all blocked and granny— landlady Song-Hee, who’s not me, I promise, said I can come back here. She didn’t talk to you?” 

“I don’t know. I was hammered last night,” Taehyung replied, gazing deep into the world outside the window.

“I figured.” 

“Oh!” He swirled back to Jeongguk, shoulders jumping as a memory came back. 

“She did!”

She did!

The kind landlady did call him as he was one, or was it two, glasses of gin-tequila-tonic down! He remembered slurring into the phone, telling her how lonely he was and it was great , a Christmas miracle that he wouldn’t have to be alone in that intimate cabin and—

“There we go,” Jeongguk chuckled. 

“Wait.” Taehyung’s mind halted its thought dumping. 

“... Waiting... ” 

“Did you just say… snowstorm!? ”

It was snowing! That’s right! Last night! That was why the world was all white. He was wondering with a drunken mind where all the cocaine was coming from!

“... Yes.”

“Oh.” 

“My.” 

“God!”  

“I must run!” 

“Of course, you must run.” 

A wide ear-to-ear grin on his face, Taehyung sprinted past the bed, stumbling as his leg got caught in its foot. Thankfully, his pinky toe didn’t get stubbed by the cursed furniture. 

“Alright, carefully! We’ll run carefully!” Jeongguk caught him as he was about to fall and land straight on his face. 

Taehyung only giggled louder. It was snowing, for Heaven’s sake!

A Christmas miracle, indeed!

How long had it been since Taehyung celebrated a white Christmas!? He hadn’t celebrated anything in forever.

It was a great decision it was to come here, thought Taehyung as he ran outside the door, tiny snowflakes falling in his eyes, blurring the world so white it made Taehyung never want to go back inside.

Jeongguk leaned against the door frame, hands snug inside the jammies’ pockets and a smile plastered on his face. 

The man, Taehyung as he had introduced himself in a still sleepy slash drunken haze, was busy doing… God only knew what he was doing.

He was… peculiar, a breath of fresh air, it was mixed with alcohol, but it was a nice change in Jeongguk’s dull life. Or well, at least for now. 

“Jeongguk!” Taehyung yelled from where he was rolling on the snow… Wasn’t it cold? He was literally rolling on snow? 

“Aren’t you cold?” Jeongguk asked, slightly worried. 

Come to think of it, why was Jeongguk even looking over him? It was his job to look over people, but this man… Jeongguk wanted to keep him safe , secured, for some reason, ever since he had walked into the cabin last night, knocking on the door once, twice, thrice, before sighing and giving up. It was getting colder by the minute, the snow kept landing on the ground, and Jeongguk stood there, on the edge of the door waiting for a reply. Instead, all he got was a loud thud, followed by booming laughter, which then turned into little sobs, which then turned into a faint whisper of a lullaby. 

It was like a miracle, what had Taehyung called it earlier, right, a Christmas miracle, the moment the deep and smooth, blue and grey voice of the stranger had flowed in his ears; What was that song he was singing? It was beautiful.

Without thinking, Jeongguk had used his keys to the cabin, ones that granny Song had given to him as a keepsake permanently, and had opened the door, mumbling apologies. He felt like a criminal intruding in someone’s place.

But the man… he was on the floor… and the singing had stopped. Jeongguk had wanted to hear it for another eternity. 

“Oh god, please don’t be dead.” Rushing closer to the man, praying that he was alright, Jeongguk had then done the usual, muscles moving solely on memory; one, check the pulse, it was okay, a little slow, by the smell of alcohol in the air and his breath, it was probably because of that; which led him to check his temperature, thankfully the furnace was still going, it was about to die, but the fire was there, and the man wasn’t as cold, the last thing Jeongguk wanted was an alcohol poisoning patient on his hands when the roads to the nearest hospitals were all blocked. 

Concluding that he was just asleep, Jeongguk had taken off his coat and muffler, little pearls of snow falling on the floor, and carefully slipped his arms under the man’s waist and thighs to raise him and carry to the bed. 

It was only when the stranger was all warm and secured under a layer of blankets that Jeongguk had walked back to the carpet, grabbing the firewood by the furnace, and had plopped them inside one by one, staying awake all night on the spot… just to be safe. 

“Jeongguk!” Taehyung yelled again, “you should join me!” 

Jeongguk chuckled. What a simple-minded guy. 

He was just crying his eyes out going on and on about something or the other about gummies and angels, then he went on a ramble on about how Jeongguk was the killer landlady, and now he was calling him to roll on the snow with him. Really, peculiar wasn’t enough of an adjective for him, didn’t do Taehyung justice.

“What’re you even doing?” Jeongguk yelled back.

“Makin’ snow angels!” Taehyung grinned widely. 

Tilting his head to the side, Jeongguk checked out the snow angel he was imprinting on the ground.

“You should make ‘em with me!” 

Walking over to him, Jeongguk crouched on the ground, cringing at how cold and wet the snow was, and this man was just— lying on top of it making angels. 

“Isn’t it cold?” Jeongguk asked, hesitating to even touch the ground again. 

“You know, my pop and I, we used to make snow angels like this,” Taehyung sighed dreamily, eyes far away in the morning sky. 

He mentioned his father a lot, something about that made Jeongguk smile warmly. A kid, this man was a kid at heart. Jeongguk couldn’t remember a time he had lived like Taehyung, saying whatever came to his mind, doing things instinctively without a second thought, crying and singing and laughing so freely, despite being in the presence of another. Jeongguk, somewhere, was a little envious. 

“Ah, fuck it,” he murmured under his breath, “snow angels, huh?” 

“Yes, sir! When I stand up, my bum’s going to be numb, but it’s going to be worth it! You’ll see!” 

Jeongguk laughed aloud, plopping on his own bum he figured was going to be numb after this, and laying beside Taehyung on snow, copying how his arms and legs swayed in a starfish position. 

“I think I used to do this with my sister too,” Jeongguk said abruptly. 

“Yeah? It’s nice, ‘sn’t it? Reliving childhood memories. Like, we know they’re gone, they’ll always remain gone, but it’s nice. It’s sad in a way going back to your childhood home is, it’s longing.” 

Jeongguk turned to Taehyung. “You’re right, it is like longing, pure unadulterated longing,” he repeated, wide-eyed.

“Why’re you looking at me like that!? Don’t suspect me, officer!” Taehyung laughed brightly. 

Another thing that was nice at that moment, Taehyung’s smile, thought Jeongguk. It was nice when he wasn’t crying. 

“Why were you crying last night?” he asked suddenly.

Part of the reason Jeongguk already knew, granny had told him Taehyung was supposed to come with his boyfriend— Jeongguk was now utterly relieved it was a boyfriend , and from the incoherent mumbles of Taehyung’s from this morning, he figured it wasn’t a very good relationship, but he wanted to hear it, for some reason Jeongguk wanted to get to know Taehyung. 

Taehyung was silent for a long while. 

Just as Jeongguk was about to apologize for running his mouth so inconsiderately, Taehyung spoke up in his deep yet snow soft voice. 

“I just came out of a long-term relationship,” he chuckled, “this was supposed to be the one Christmas getaway that would make everything alright, but I guess the Universe had other plans for us.” 

Taehyung was still smiling. He had been crying so much, maybe even more when Jeongguk hadn’t known someone named Taehyung who liked to make angels in the snow existed. But he was smiling so peacefully now. Jeongguk wished he could do that too. 

“I think somewhere I’m glad we broke apart.” 

“I didn’t deserve that,” Taehyung’s voice trembled. 

Oh.

He was… he was trying hard to smile. He wasn’t just smiling. He was putting immense effort into it. 

“Anyway!” 

“Shower! I wanna take a gooood long shower now!” Taehyung jumped up, holding out his hand for Jeongguk to take, “Let’s go inside!” 

“No, wait!” Jeongguk was about to take his hand, but Taehyung retracted it abruptly. 

“I’ll just get my camera real quick, and then you’re free! Wait just a sec, okay?” He yelled as he ran back to the cabin. 

Jeongguk was left to mumble under his breath, “Be careful, don’t fall, oh god, that’s going to hurt!” 

Another effortless smile made a home on his face as he watched Taehyung wobble on the ground, falling on his bums with a loud thud before standing up again, back all soaked with snow. 

He was way too cute, and this was way too strange.

Because there he was, a man in his late twenties, laying on the ground making snow angels and waiting for a stranger to come back with his camera to capture this moment they might never get to relive.  

And yet.

His heart was as warm as the fire that burned inside the furnace. 

Strange.

Jeongguk smiled infinitely. 

“One, two—”

“Oh, god, Taehyung, just take the picture, my ass is dead now,” Jeongguk groaned, limbs fumbling on the snow like a huge, buff starfish. An angel rested beside him, the shape in the ground Taehyung had imprinted. 

An angel beside an angel, Taehyung chuckled. 

“Three~ Say— Christmas miracle! ”

The analog film camera’s shutter made a soft clicking sound, capturing the moment for an eternity to come. 

“Alright! Good game, folks!” Taehyung held out his hand for Jeongguk to take. 

“What folks!? There’s literally no one here besides us,” Jeongguk huffed as he held his hand, getting up with a groan.

“You’re an old man, is that it?” 

“I’m not!” 

“How old are you?” 

They made their way back to the cabin, clothes sticking to their backs. 

“29 this year.”

“Wait, I’m older than you!” Taehyung exclaimed in awe.

Jeongguk looked younger, but he also seemed mature. Maybe it was his eyes, they held a certain ache in them, the kind you’re able to tell it’s there as shadows flash across them fleetingly. Taehyung wondered what it was. 

“What do you do?” he asked again.

Jeongguk opened the cabin door, holding it for Taehyung to walk inside first. What a gentleman, maybe he should ask him if he was single next, or if he was even gay, or bi, or pan.

Ugh, what if he’s straight… but he made such good pancakes! I have hope… or not. You just got out of a relationship, Taehyung! Get a grip!

“Are you interrogating me again, Taehyung?” Jeongguk asked with a hearty chuckle.

Taehyung felt bad for accusing him of being a killer landlady before. 

“Just wanna know more about you.” He walked over to the bedside table where rested his bag. Keeping the camera back in its cover, Taehyung took out a fresh pair of jammies, his favorite fluffy bear ones, and began to take his soaked top off, throwing it on the chair with a loud swoosh.

“Oh. So you just casually change in front of strangers you accuse of being killer landladies?” 

Taehyung turned around, shrugging. “What do you do besides killing firewood? I know you chopped all those, muscle man.” Taehyung eyed the enormous muscles bulging out of Jeongguk’s biceps as he took his own wet hoodie off. Gulping, he dared not look at the gorgeous tummy this man was sporting. So he had a thing for muscles, sue him!

“You,” Jeongguk breathed, fluffy head disappearing as he put on the black hoodie before it plopped out again, “are correct,” he giggled, nose all scrunched up and bunny teeth poking out. 

“I’m a doctor, general physician. I work at Seoul University Hospital.” Jeongguk moved to the bathroom, grabbing his pajamas. 

A doctor… A whole Doctor!

Not only did Taehyung accuse Jeongguk, a doctor , of something so absurd, but he made him make snow angels with him! 

Oh, god, Taehyung, really, get a grip, get back to Earth, you’re still a little too high in the sky from all that cursed alcohol.  

The sounds of water gushing filled the room suddenly, bringing Taehyung out of his mind. Walking to the bathroom, he found Jeongguk bent near the big bathtub, his wet jammies’ bottoms all changed. His one hand was inside the water, perhaps checking its temperature.

“You wanted to take a bath, right? See if the water’s hot enough,” Jeongguk said, ushering Taehyung to come closer. 

Walking in, Taehyung dipped his hand inside the tub, mere inches away from Jeongguk. 

“Mm’ iss good,” Taehyung murmured, suddenly feeling warm all over. 

“Hot enough?”

“Uh huh,” he squeaked, backing away.

White transparent mist from the hot water was starting to form inside the small bathroom, clouding Taehyung’s eyes and his mind. 

“Great! I’ll be in the kitchen, what would you like to eat for lunch?” Jeongguk asked as he got up. 

“What all do we have?” 

“I got some food on my way here last night. How about white sauce pasta? You like it?”

“Mhm!” 

“Okay, I’ll be out of your way then.” Jeongguk walked out of the room, brushing past Taehyung’s side just faintly. 

Taehyung was left to gape at particularly nothing on the white wall, secretly hoping Jeongguk had done that on purpose. 

Shaking himself out of the haze, Taehyung shuffled around and found a laundry basket, a pair of jammies and a hoodie already dropped inside. Taking his bottoms off, he put them into the basket beside Jeongguk’s clothes, and wriggled out his fluffy bear top, keeping it neatly on the sink to wear later. 

Finally submerging deep into the water that was just the perfect temperature, Taehyung let it soothe his soul, heal the cracks of his heart. 

The soft sizzling of onion echoed in the kitchen, mixing with the rustling of his clothes as he shuffled around, preparing their lunch. The comforting smells of herbs lingered in the air, and soon came the thick aroma of cheese, making Jeongguk sigh in content. 

Turning the stove’s knobs off, Jeongguk poured the white sauce with sautéed veggies on top of the pasta, topping it all off with freshly plucked basil leaves.

“Done!” Jeongguk exclaimed in delight. 

“White pasta for a white Christmas!” The thought itself made him chuckle.

Jeongguk had always relished in the art of cooking, loved the way the different smells of food made a house come alive, and he loved feeding other people, watching them eat with big smiles on their faces, it had become a habit after he would cook for his sister, but it had been so long since then. 

It had been so long since Jeongguk had this much fun cooking for someone else, being with someone else. 

Keeping the plates on the counter, he took a stool and waited for Taehyung to arrive. And he waited some more.

And waited… and waited.

He’s taking too long. Should I bake cookies? A cake!? Vanilla for White Christmas!?

Jeongguk was about to get up and get baking, but Taehyung erupted in the kitchen, finally , looking all fresh and sparkly and oh so cuddly in those bear jammies of his.

A kid, really . Jeongguk chuckled.

“Hello friends, I am back!” Taehyung walked to the stool, nose twitching as he sniffed the air. 

Jeongguk only fidgeted in anticipation.

Will he like it— will he like it— he liked the pancakes— will he like it—

“It smells like Heaven in here, and oh, wow, you’re an artist,” Taehyung let out a chuckle of awe, eyes glittering animatedly at the plates.

“Taste it! Go ahead!” Jeongguk was practically hopping on the seat.

“Okay, okay, bunny boy.” Taehyung ruffled his hair before taking a big mouthful. Jeongguk loved that he took such big bites, chewing on the food with an adorable pout. 

“Holy Shit.”

“Good? 'Is good?”

“Is so— so good!? What the hell sort of sorcery did you do!?” Taehyung squealed, taking more bites, basically devouring the whole plate. 

“Guess the secret ingredient— can you guess?”

“Cinnamon!?” 

“Did you put cinnamon in pasta too!?” Taehyung asked, eyes all big and round. So cute. 

“Yep! Good job!” Jeongguk beamed, rumpling Taehyung’s hair. So soft, he’s like a little puppy. A bear and a puppy. A puppybear. 

“My mama used to put cinnamon in everything in winters too,” Taehyung said out of the blue.

“Yeah?”

“Mhm.” He smiled. “She passed away when I was little.” 

“Oh.”

“I’m— I’m sorry.” Jeongguk looked down at his plate, his vision suddenly blurring. 

“It’s alright, been years, plus, I like talking about her! Been so long since I did,” Taehyung whispered. 

Jeongguk turned to him. Taehyung’s eyes were down too, long, wet lashes fluttering rapidly, hands fidgeting with the fork. All of it made Jeongguk ache inside, wondering why, why, he wanted to ask why, Didn’t you talk about your mother with your ex ? Didn’t you make snow angels with your ex? And Jeongguk, he might not have been in a lot of relationships, but he knew for a solid fact you weren’t supposed to make your partner look this— this lonely. 

“This pasta, even the coffee, it all reminds me of her, so in a way, this is so great, like a breath of crisp winter air! It hurts in just the most perfect ways!” Taehyung giggled facing Jeongguk again, eyes turning into half-moons. 

Jeongguk’s own eyes smiled in gratitude. Taehyung was right, this was great. This miraculous Christmas. Lonely, or not, it was great.

“You know, I was wondering.” After a while of eating in silence, Taehyung spoke again, voice soft and low. 

“Why didn’t you book this place till Christmas? People usually stay longer, right?” 

Jeongguk’s heart stilled for a second.

“You left on Christmas eve, and I’m assuming you were alone like me, too. If you don’t mind me asking! ‘M overly curious sometimes, occupational hazard, just shush me if I overstep your boundaries!” 

“It’s— it’s alright, Taehyung, don’t worry,” Jeongguk blurted without thinking.

“I— uh—” 

He hesitated to answer, not used to being open with people, but there was something about Taehyung. Maybe it was just the way he was, so friendly, so easygoing. Or maybe it was the fact that they were strangers who would most likely never sit together and have lunch on a snowy day like this again. 

Whatever it was, made Jeongguk want to pour his heart out from his eyes in front of him. 

So many trials at therapy, and yet Jeongguk couldn’t get himself to talk about the incident that had locked him inside the prison of his past, the only one who held the key had already gone far, far away. But this man, this man looking at him with such profound eyes, he made him want to tear that cage open right then and there.

“It’s— um.” Gulping harshly, Jeongguk braced himself on the stool. 

“It’s my sister’s death anniversary today.” He blinked rapidly, looking up at the ceiling. 

“She passed away on a white Christmas just like today. Granny Song’s been a family friend for years, so we used to spend our winter holidays here every year.” 

“That year, seven years ago, was the only one I couldn’t come. My family kept asking me to come, it wasn’t the same without me, my sister said on the phone.”

It was getting harder to get the words out. But the lone, trembling hand of Taehyung’s so gentle on his thigh encouraged Jeongguk to go on. 

“But I couldn’t. I was working as an intern at a hospital, you don’t know how cruel it is for medical interns, a-and yeah. I told my family I won’t make it, and time went by, Christmas almost went by too, but I got a phone call at— at midnight. It was some senior ER doctor from the hospital calling to let me know that my family’d gotten in an accident. They were brought to our ER.”

“My dad, mom, they got out with minor injuries.”

Jeongguk couldn’t hold back tears anymore.

The night was as fresh in his mind as an open wound on a patient’s body. It clung to him, haunted him. His sister lay still on the bed he was so used to seeing every waking hour of his life. The world, time, his breaths, everything had stopped, ice cold and dead in its tracks. Nothing had remained alive anymore. 

He didn’t even know why, why were they on the road on that night after celebrating Christmas, it was snowing, for Heaven’s sake. 

“My parents later told me Haewon had been begging to drive to me and see me before Christmas ended, and—” Jeongguk sobbed in his hands. “It started snowing on the way.” 

“We couldn’t save her. Ever since then I came back here every year but didn't have it in me to just... stay. I go see her at the columbarium every year on Christmas, but this year I guess the Universe had other plans for me too.”

He wiped the searing tears with the back of his hoodie. 

“Oh, Jeongguk ,” Taehyung’s trembling voice filled his grey mind, “I’m so— so sorry.” It sounded pained.

“Don’t be,” Jeongguk smiled in between stutters, “thanks for listening.”

And not saying anything in return. Just, listening.  

“I haven’t opened up about this to anybody. My friends, family, every time I tried they kept telling me I wasn’t to blame, that I tried all I could to save her, that it was alright I was just an intern and it was all out of my control, but I didn’t want to hear any of that. I just wanted someone to listen.”

“So, I stopped talking about it.” Jeongguk shrugged, sniffling. “But it eats you alive, you know? Guilt.” 

The world outside the window was still white. There was a time Jeongguk couldn’t endure even looking at it. 

“It does,” Taehyung whispered, hand still soft on Jeongguk’s thighs, “but it gets better.”

“You think?” He faced Taehyung who nodded softly.

“Mhm. That’s all I know.” 

Smiling, Jeongguk nodded too. 

“But I also know you’re a great person, Jeongguk, so very kind. I mean, who leaves a note for strangers in a cabin telling them to stay safe, let alone cleans the fireplace,” Taehyung giggled. And it was suddenly much warmer inside.

“I know your sister was very happy and proud to have you as a big brother.”

Out of the blue, the images of the angels they had imprinted on the ground flashed in front of Jeongguk’s eyes. They were faceless, mere shapes on fleeting snow, yet Jeongguk knew at that moment they were smiling. 

Snow angels, huh. Haewon really did love those.

Maybe he could do this every Christmas. Jeongguk surprised himself with that thought.

“I’m sure she’s looking at you right now, seeing you come back here every year despite it hurting so much, it must hurt so much.” Taehyung’s own eyes were damp. For him. He was aching for Jeongguk. That alone was enough to thaw the ice that had crippled his heart for over years, years . 

This man, what is he.

“And look at you taking such good care of a stranger like me. She knows you save countless lives now, she must be so proud, smiling so wide.” Taehyung smiled through tears, and Jeongguk simply nodded.

He wanted to believe Taehyung was telling the truth. His sister was proud of him, he was atoning enough.

Regrets only go for so long.  

Jeongguk wanted to live a good, sincere life for his sister. If Taehyung saw that, it was enough validation.

Faith. Jeongguk wanted to have faith in himself. 

“Thank you, Taehyung, really.” Jeongguk shook his head, smiling, “Thank you.” 

“Don’t thank me, I’m sorry I asked such a personal question just to satisfy my curiosity.”

“You okay? Want water? A hug?” Taehyung rambled; Jeongguk liked it when he did.

“Water.”

The stool scraped against the wooden floor as Taehyung wriggled out of it, waddling behind the counter. He filled a glass with water and handed it to Jeongguk. 

“Thanks.” The small tremble in Taehyung’s hand didn’t go unnoticed by him. 

Nodding, Taehyung cleared the plates away, filled a kettle with water too and put it on the stove. 

The aroma of cinnamon coffee poured out from the mug Taehyung kept in front of Jeongguk. 

“What is it? Your occupation?” Jeongguk asked in the midst of silent drinking, “you said it was an occupational hazard, your curiosity.” 

“Oh! Right!” Taehyung exclaimed, “‘m a writer!” 

“A— a writer? You mean—”

“An author!” 

“You— really!?” Jeongguk spluttered.

“What?” pouted Taehyung. 

“Nothing, nothing. That was… not what I’d expected.”

“Yeah? Imagine how I felt when you said you were a doctor. I called you a criminal!” Taehyung’s laughter brightened the whole cabin again. 

“Do— um— have I read any of your books? Do you write under your real name? This is so bizarre, oh my god, what if you’re my favorite author, what am I going to do then?”

“Get my signature? Get a hug? Whatever works for you,” Taehyung chuckled.

“No— I— wait, tell me some of your books!” he let out a sound that was dangerously close to a whine.

“I’m guessing you’re a reader. This is so cute,” giggled Taehyung, “I write under a pen name actually. Taeyang? You know, like the sun and all. Maybe you know that book. Why Do People —”

“ Why do people live… ” 

No.  

There was no way. 

Jeongguk gaped at Taehyung whose eyes were as wide and astonished as his own.

“Yeah! That! You’ve read it!? It’s my fav—”

“It’s my favorite book!” Keeping the coffee mug aside, Jeongguk exclaimed loudly, “I— Taehyung— you —” 

“Oh my god.”

He was losing it, that was the only explanation. There was no way Taehyung was the author of the one book that had saved him from himself on countless nights. 

“Okay, maybe it’s time for that signature? Or you’d prefer a hug?” 

“You don’t get it—” Jeongguk shook his head, pinching the bridge of his nose.

“That book— it saved me so many times, this—” He pointed towards his heart, a furrow remaining between his brows.

“Any sliver of hope I hold in my heart after that accident was all because of that book— because of your words,” Jeongguk emphasized. 

His heart was thudding loudly in his ears, and he was warm all over. Taehyung didn’t realize just how important this— he was to Jeongguk. 

Once, Jeongguk used to lie awake at night. He used to have sleeping problems, not insomnia, but it was bad because he would start thinking… 

What was even the point of life, his life?

What was the point of anything?

He knew it, he knew the answers.

He was doing it all for his sister, for his parents who smiled for him every time he visited them, hiding their own grief behind a transparent veil. Jeongguk knew it all.

But sometimes, when you’re lying awake at crippling hours of midnight, you forget things. 

You forget yourself. 

And it becomes easy to think… What’s even the fucking point …? What if I ended it all?  

His parents would be sad. It would be another tragedy. But his anguish would be over. Wasn’t that the point, wasn’t that the point of life?

A little peace and calm?

It happened a few nights later, perhaps a Christmas angel somewhere was guiding him towards redemption. He had been keeping himself away from the horrors of his mind, and instead of being alone in his apartment at nights, Jeongguk would go to a 24/7 diner, soft jazz playing in the background, and on one such night, Jeongguk had caught a glimpse of the book a woman was reading just couple seats away from him, its cover a soft pastel yellow, white bold words talking to his soul.

WHY DO PEOPLE LIVE.

And now here he was, perched in the kitchen of the cabin he spent every Christmas of his childhood at, with the author of that book just sipping on the coffee he made them after listening to him pour his deepest anguish out.

The taste of cinnamon rolled on Jeongguk’s tongue; its smells ignited a forgotten longing in his soul. 

“Oh—” Taehyung kept the coffee mug on the counter. 

“Oh.”

He seemed to have gotten the clue. 

“Taehyung… This— god — this really is a Christmas miracle.” Jeongguk wanted to laugh out loud.

Suddenly, he did. 

“That’s what I've been telling you since this morning!” laughed Taehyung loudly too, making Jeongguk forget a great ounce of pain from his life.

“You’re unbelievable. You need to give me like— 10 signatures!”

“Just 10!?”

“And hugs.”

“Mhm, I can do that.” 

And after a long time, Jeongguk really thought he could get used to something. 

A mug of hot cocoa rested snugly in his hand, warming it infinitely. 

The fire crackled softly in its heart, its warmth adding to that of the cocoa milk. Taehyung sipped it occasionally, turning pages after another, devouring the words of love and anguish printed on old brown paper.

Not long after, the smells of fresh soap flowed inside the room.

Taehyung turned his head from where he was laying on his tummy on the carpet. 

“How do you feel?” he asked Jeongguk who was walking towards him, face flushed pink after his bath.

As he came closer, Taehyung saw the redness of his eyes. 

Jeongguk must have been crying in there, the thought itself made Taehyung sad.

“Always great after a bath,” Jeongguk smiled, falling on the heap of blankets beside Taehyung. 

“Whatcha reading?” he asked, water still dripping from his wet black hair.

“Dry it! Your hair!” Taehyung squealed, “Oh my god, do you want to catch a cold, Jeongguk!? I thought you were a doctor!”

He wriggled inside the blanket burrito, wanting to crawl out and dry Jeongguk’s hair for him. Wet hair, as enticing as it looked, was a major pet peeve of Taehyung’s. 

“Eh, fire, it’s hot, it’ll dry on its own.” Jeongguk shrugged, making Taehyung mumble complaints and pout.

“Stop being adorable, please. One can only go so long without squishing cheeks,” Jeongguk muttered, shaking his wet head to soak Taehyung in cold water. 

As Taehyung whined some more, Jeongguk only flumped on his back, head upside down near Taehyung’s book. 

“Gone With The Wind, huh, romantic,” he chuckled, nuzzling the blanket that lay there. 

The night rose darker by the second. The cold wind howled just faintly as it blew from the open window, bringing with a whiff of old memories.  

“It is,” Taehyung sighed dreamily, letting his own head fall near Jeongguk, eyes straight in line with the other’s cupid’s bow lips. There was a mole there, right beneath Jeongguk’s lower lip; Taehyung had never seen anything prettier.

Curling into a ball beside Jeongguk’s body, Taehyung uttered softly, “My pops is a professor of English literature, wartime romance is his one field of focus. He made me read this, among other American, even some Russian novels. I could only read in Korean, though, and before we knew it, this one book became our reading tradition during the holidays.”

How nostalgic. Everything about the stay in this cabin brimmed with nostalgia.

“That’s so nice,” Jeongguk hushed, breath tickling Taehyung’s face, making him giggle out loud. 

“It is!”

It was. Very nice.

Not just his old memories, but this. The whole day. With Jeongguk, laying beside him, talking to him, eating with him, listening to him pour his anguish out, breathing in silence by his side, it was all so very nice, in the way going back to his childhood home was. 

Longing, it was pure, unadulterated longing. 

“Does he write too, your dad? Why did you become a writer?” Jeongguk asked with endearing puppy dog eyes. 

“He wrote me letters,” Taehyung chuckled, remembering the long, heavy letters his father used to write to him in old Shakespearean English that he had to translate using multiple online dictionaries.

“I guess I’ve been reading for as long as I can remember, and somewhere along the way, I’d accumulated all these stories in my head and I thought, what if I wrote them in a book too, and before I knew it, I was making up fairy tales with dragons that breathed fire and warriors that were also part-time strawberry farmers and oh god , it was a whole crazy world,” Taehyung laughed out loud.

“That’s so inspiring, you have no idea, and the whole strawberry farmer-warrior thing is crazy brilliant,” Jeongguk laughed along. Taehyung’s heart thudded with his words.

This was more than just nice.

A type of support Taehyung never got from Bogum. He only blamed Taehyung for making his work his love, but here Jeongguk was, just throwing words of encouragement like free fliers being distributed on a pavement. 

Even knowing that he had read and liked his book meant the world to Taehyung. Not in a self-consumed— Oh, you read my book— way, but in a genuine— Oh, my words helped you come out of your hard times. Really, then my purpose is fulfilled. I hope they always help you, keep you sane, happy. That’s all I work for, that’s all I live for. Because I understand— I understand your pain. All I want is to wipe your tears away, but I can’t do that, so I’m glad, at least my words were a source of home, at least they provided some comfort to you— way.

He knew, he knew what all things people raved about his books, they were best sellers for a reason. Many of his readers told him how much his words had helped them in their dark times. His genre was romance, but he wrote it in a way it was easy to understand the individual pain of two people. 

Why do people live was his one experiment with mixing mainstream romance with not so sought after philosophies, with existential angst and nihilist extremes.

It was about two lovers, wanting to end their lives in the age-old traditional ritual of double suicide, but just as they were about to jump off a tall, lonely cliff, the serene sounds of water filling their ears and the hazy blue mist across the mountain clouding their mind, filling it with a sense of peace they had never felt in their busy lives, one slipped under. Just like that. An accident. While the other remained in this world, living under the excruciatingly heavy burden of that foggy night on the hill some people went to stargaze at, and others, to become the twinkling wonders themselves. 

Taehyung understood what Jeongguk meant with his words. He must have felt the same as the lovers at one point. 

Agony. Peace. Haunting nights. And one tall, lonely hill. 

What was the point of life? Why did people live? 

Taehyung understood Jeongguk. And he was glad, he was so immensely glad his book had helped him come out of that headspace. He was glad. 

“You know,” Taehyung whispered, breaking the easy silence that had fallen upon them, the silence that had never felt so beautiful before, “my ex never read my books.”

It was funny.

Bogum complained that Taehyung was always writing, but he never tried to understand why Taehyung worked so hard, glued to his seat and wearing his eyes and fingers out on the laptop. All he wanted was for people to be content reading something nice, something comforting in a world so cold and cruel. 

Like rainbows at dawn. Like Irises blooming at twilight. He only wanted to bring some hope to their lives. 

“Your ex sounds like a horrible person, I’m not gonna lie,” Jeongguk tutted.

“Oh well, he was a good boyfriend. He tried his best, we just didn’t see eye to eye,” Taehyung blurted, only realizing seconds later that he had revealed his sexuality to a stranger.

It wasn’t a bad thing, only if Jeongguk wasn’t… uncomfortable.

“I’m— I’m sorry. Does— does that make you uncomfortable?” Taehyung asked nervously, gathering himself from the carpet and sitting up, creating a safe distance between.

“Hmm?” Jeongguk shuffled up too. “Does what makes me uncomfortable?” he asked with an endearing tilt of his head.

The golden starlights twinkled brightly above them. The fire kept crackling softly in the background. Taehyung squirmed on the carpet, gazing at the delicate shadows of Jeongguk’s lashes against his smooth, glowing skin. 

“Y- you know, the boyfriend thing. I’m not straight, I’m gay,” he mumbled, half hoping Jeongguk heard it, half praying he didn’t. 

It wasn’t even a big deal. Taehyung was openly gay. He even wrote LGBTQ+ fiction and nonfiction under the same pen name.

But meeting guys, telling them he was gay for the first time and seeing discomfort settle in their posture as their shoulders would stiffen and they would back away just for the faintest of moments, it was nerve-wracking, to say the least. The last thing Taehyung wanted was to make Jeongguk uncomfortable in his own safe space, not to forget, he was compelled to stay here with him, too. 

“Why— why would that make me uncomfortable, Taehyung?” Jeongguk eyed him curiously.

“Even if I also wasn’t quite literally gay, your sexuality wouldn’t ever make me uncomfortable.” 

Taehyung sighed in relief, before stilling completely. Because— did— did Jeongguk just say—

“Oh.”

“Oh!” It finally hit him.

“You’re— you’re gay too!?” 

Jeongguk nodded with a nose scrunchy smile, moving closer to ruffle Taehyung’s hair again, cooing how adorable he was, but all that played in his mind was,

Holy Fuck, He’s Gay. This gorgeous, not to mention, the kindest human I’ve met is gay! Like me! I’m also gay!

A gay Christmas miracle, what else was this if not a gay Christmas miracle.

“Oh!” 

“Jeongguk!” Taehyung jumped up suddenly, the blanket burrito falling loose from his shoulders.

“Merry Christmas!” He hadn’t even wished him yet!

From his golden sight, Taehyung saw Jeongguk erupt into laughter; it reminded him of how the fire had come to life in the furnace, soft, bright, warm, so, so beautiful.

“Merry Christmas, Taehyung. This was my best one in a long, long time.” Jeongguk grinned widely. 

Somewhere deep down, Taehyung hoped there would come another Christmas where they would get to laugh, and eat, and drink, and talk like this.

Someday far beyond the wide sky. 

The hues of orange and yellow swayed in the furnace, creating effervescent warmth in the dark cabin and his soul.

Jeongguk looked down at the carpet where they were huddled together again after dinner. His gaze landed on the book that was now completely forgotten, and then at the one who lay near his thighs, snoring softly inside his cocoon as he slept through the silent night. 

Softly, as gently as he could, Jeongguk stroked the light brown strands away from Taehyung’s face, reveling in the way his nose scrunched, making him want to trace his finger down, down, down— 

Jeongguk could still hear it in the air, their laughter that had rung just a few hours ago, their bickering and running around the kitchen as they caused chaos so sweet in the whole forest. 

. . . 

“Don’t. Taehyung, don’t you dare —”

“Don’t you throw that flour on me — I just took a bat — Taehyung!”

He gasped in horror as Taehyung, squealing and laughing in pure delight, started a war with him, Jeon Jeongguk. The perfectionist, not to mention, the competitive, nitpicking, cleanliness freak.

Or well, according to his family and friends that was, he was totally not all of the above, totally.

“Oops, too bad,” Taehyung shrugged, hiding a grin behind his innocent flutter of lashes, 

He strutted behind the counter and took the bowl of cake batter that Jeongguk was so busy mixing when the attack had happened. 

“Okay.” Jeongguk backed away, eyes raking over Taehyung’s lean body as he bent over the counter just slightly, dipping a slender finger in the chocolate batter and licking it clean with a pop. 

Okay, Jeongguk could play that game. 

“If that’s how we’re playing it,” he smirked, pushing the sleeves of his hoodie up, revealing his strong, veiny arms as he closed the distance between Taehyung who backed from the counter, dumbfounded. 

“Jeon—” Taehyung sputtered, eyes comically wide.

Oh, so adorable, so, so precious.

Taehyung didn’t seem to know how Jeongguk held him in his eyes, how he would dare not cross any boundaries between them, but he also didn’t know how competitive Jeongguk was. A challenge was a challenge. 

“Um, G-guk — okay — ‘m sorry, I surrender. Please roll back your sleeves, your arms are scary,” Taehyung pouted, stumbling back, all the way back, hitting the kitchen wall.

“Nu-uh, you can’t just surrender after doing the damage.” Jeongguk strode forward, eyes hiding a grin, and hands behind his back, hiding a flour packet. 

There wasn’t a lot of distance left in between them. Perhaps it wasn’t his imagination when Taehyung fluttered his lashes for the faintest of moments, looking down at his lips, throat bobbing softly, perhaps all of this did happen, or perhaps Jeongguk was just caught in the haze of the moment, standing so close to Taehyung he could smell the whisper of cocoa from his warm breath, the hint of baby lotion from his skin. 

“Jeongguk — um —” 

What Jeongguk wouldn’t do to hear that delicate sound of Taehyung’s voice call out his name like this. But for now, he was content with caging him in his arms, mere inches away from pressing into the softness of his body.

“Gguk! Oh my god!” 

And his loud squeals when Jeongguk finally squished those puffy cheeks in his flour coated hands, Jeongguk could certainly make them his prayers. 

“Jeongguk!” Taehyung scolded. 

“What!? You started it!” 

“You squished my face with flour!”

“You threw it in my hair!”

“Fine, you know what, come here, come get that hug you wanted.” Taehyung pushed himself from the wall, slotting his body against before tightly wrapping his arms around him and nuzzling to his heart’s content.

“Tae — Don’t — Tae!” Jeongguk groaned even though he would give anything for this moment to be repeated sometime… 

“Taste your own medicine!”

“You literally started it!” 

And so, after a while of grumbling and complaining, the kitchen erupted in loud, sweet laughter as the two took good long looks at each other, two grown men fighting with flour like little kids whilst making a cake on Christmas passing. 

Really, it was the best time Jeongguk had in a while.   

. . . 

Jeongguk smiled as Taehyung’s little snores brought him back to the room, eyes still lingering over his delicate features.

Heavens, this man was sculpted by the elegant finesse of the great rulers of the Heavens themselves. Even smushed with flour, Taehyung only looked like the most gorgeous wonder to Jeongguk.

And Jeongguk liked it, when he was peacefully snoring this like, when he was making strategies of flour attacks in his head, when he was laughing or grumbling loudly in the whole place, when he was rambling animatedly all around, and even when he was silently zoning out; it was as if Taehyung were many different people, and Jeongguk liked all of them. 

And he was scared that he did. 

It had just been one day. He had met him around this time last night, on the same spot. Jeongguk had never thought in his wildest dreams his world could come to this—

This. 

The stroking of his finger against the soft skin near Taehyung’s eyes, the way his own eyes held him so delicately, and the way his heart felt so complete, so content in being near him. How could it have come to this.

It’s been just one day.

Jeongguk was scared.

He retreated his hands, eyes lighting up as Taehyung chased after his touch unconsciously, but Jeongguk shook himself and got up. 

As a repeat of last night, Jeongguk carefully took Taehyung with all of his blanket nest in his arms and carried him to the bed, covering him with more layers of blankets. 

One last look at the man still asleep without a care for the word, Jeongguk walked to the table, grabbed his phone, a muffler, and walked out the cabin.

Out on the porch, he gazed into the starry night above. Little flakes of snow were falling from the sky, some turning into rain by the time they reached the ground. 

Weird. It was weird. He was under the porch’s roof, yet somehow the raindrops managed to trickle down his face.

Thrice now, huh.

It was way too therapeutic, crying, talking; it was liberating, and Jeongguk had cried thrice in the span of one day. Once in front of another soul. 

Progress? You bet. 

But this time, he was brimming with anxiety. It wasn’t sorrow of the days long gone, or the anguish of his own heart, but fear of wanting to be close to another person after so long. 

Taehyung was based in Seoul, he knew that. He, too, worked in Seoul, and no matter how much of a distance was between the two, if Jeongguk wanted to be with Taehyung like this in the future too, it was more than just a possibility. And yet.

Yet.

Tears fell from the sky, the silver and golden stars blurred some more. His reality shook beneath his legs. 

What if… what if there came a day in the faraway future where Jeongguk could love wholeheartedly and fearlessly again. What if history decided to repeat itself then? What if he was left alone with another dead body in his arms, this time of a lover.

Jeongguk didn’t fear dying alone, he only feared the passing of his beloved, right in front of his eyes. 

In a way, he was crippled, at a standstill. His heart had stopped the day his sister died in his own hospital. 

He couldn’t move, he couldn’t possibly move towards Taehyung like that.

Could he?

Jeongguk looked at the ground, the place where he and Taehyung had etched the angels of snow. The shapes weren’t there anymore, yet the ground seemed to shine marvelously in his eyes.

Could he take a step towards Taehyung? Should he? Should he move on? 

Am I allowed to move on? Jeongguk asked to no one in particular. 

Do you want to?   Came the reply from no one in particular.

Does he? He asked himself.

Do I? 

Jeongguk sighed. He knew what he wanted, he just didn’t have the courage to accept the answer. 

Paying a last goodbye to the magical night, Jeongguk turned around and was about to walk inside when a sudden gust of wind blew loudly, shaking him out of his skin. 

The trees rustled in the distance, the snow fell on top of more snow with a loud thud. And suddenly, his phone rang.

Startled, he took it out, squinting at the harsh light to check the name caller.

Huh. That’s odd… 

“Hello?” he whispered into the speaker, not wanting to wake Taehyung up. 

“Jeonggukie!” Granny Song’s sweet voice filled his ears, calming his thudding heart.

“Granny? What’s wrong, you’re calling this late? Everything’s okay, right?” he asked frantically, anxiety crawling all the way up to his throat.

“Oh! Yes, yes, son, don’t you worry, child. Everything’s completely all right!”

“Jeonggukie, listen to me, I was watching the news,” Granny hushed. 

Jeongguk squinted again. 

Huh?

A Deja Vu?

He brought the phone near his eyes and checked the date. It was today. Why did it feel like he had gone back in time to yesterday when she had called him in the car?

The wind blew loudly again.

All Jeongguk felt was a shiver, a few goosebumps on his arms and his nape, blaming the sudden change of temperature on the cold wind, but far, somewhere far away, an angel was crying, mourning her brother’s tears that might have fallen on the ground, but his pain flew all the way beyond the sky.

And from far, much farther away, pixie dust full of courage, full of power, full of magic fell from the Heavens, yet again lightening the ground on which the two had etched the shape of smiling angels.

Confused, Jeongguk pinned the strange illumination on the silver moonlight. 

“Jeonggukie?” Granny Song’s voice echoed in the vicinity, making Jeongguk look around for a fleeting second, wondering if she was there near the cabin. 

“Oh.” He held the phone to his ears again, shaking himself out of the cold daze. 

“Sorry, granny. What— uh— what were you saying?” 

“I was watching the news, and they’re saying the roads to the city are now being unblocked! The snow storm has passed and you can go back home now.” 

“You’re allowed to move on, Jeonggukie.”

This time, the shiver in Jeongguk’s body wasn’t due to the cold. 

Wobbling back, the phone still held to the ears, Jeongguk ran to the ground. 

“This can’t be,” he whispered to himself. 

Granny Song’s voice wasn’t coming from the phone’s speaker. Hell, it wasn’t even Granny Song, was it?

The one who had called Jeongguk last night, warning him about the snowstorm, guiding him safely back to that cabin, where unbeknown to him, lay passed out the one who had not once, but twice now, saved him from his own heart, and now, the one who was calling him again… answering to him the questions he had asked to particularly no one.

A sudden jerk in his head, Jeongguk looked up at the sky, only now realizing it was no moon night. Eyes back on the shimmering ground, deep inside of which shined the snow angel, his little angel, Jeongguk heard the distant words vibrate the forest again.  

“You’re allowed to move on now, Kookie. You must.” 

What a fool, Jeongguk. You’re such a fool.

Granny Song never stayed past nine. It was almost eleven.

Come to think of it, yesterday’s call was around this time, too. 

The call ended. The ground on which Jeongguk stood continued to illuminate.

The snow had long stopped, perhaps even before Jeongguk had walked out, and the rain too had stopped falling somewhere in the mist of epiphany.

But once again, Jeongguk’s face was incredibly wet. Only this time, his tears covered his wide smile too. 

“Thank you. Thank you for looking over me, Haewonie. Rest well now. I wish you’d rest well now.” He left the tearful words with the little angel Taehyung had sealed in the ground, now buried under piles of snow, but he knew she was there, and would remain here for centuries to come. 

Sending a silent goodbye to the magic of the night, Jeongguk walked back inside. 

11:15, huh.

Christmas isn’t over yet. 

Taehyung awoke with a jolt.

The faint rustling of sheets seeped inside his ears and his back dipped as he moved underneath the huge covers.

Huh.

He was on the bed again...

Mind still refusing to awaken, Taehyung slowly recalled bits and pieces of last night before he had passed out on the floor, complaining how it was all Jeongguk’s fault that he was so drowsy after having eaten food more than the amount required for a long period of hibernation.

Shuffling inside the warm cocoon, feeling like a little cloud of snow, Taehyung murmured incoherent babbles to himself about how he could hear someone humming a song he was very familiar with again. 

A Deja Vu?

He wasn’t floating in inebriation this time, so as he eventually came out of the sleepy daze, yawning loudly and stretching his long limbs all over the bed, Taehyung heard it clearly.

The soft and sweet humming of his father’s song, the same lines on repeat. 

“Where’s my angel~” And of course, this time he knew who it was, too. 

Smiling lazily, Taehyung stumbled up and out of bed, fixing his bear jammies and bed hair, and waddled into the kitchen.

Just like yesterday, there Jeongguk was, shuffling behind the kitchen counter with his back facing Taehyung, and unlike yesterday, no sorrowful thoughts intruded in Taehyung’s mind. 

“Morning!” Instead, he greeted Jeongguk with a wide smile, “Still humming that song, I see.”

“Oh, g’morning angel.” 

Taehyung stopped still in his tracks.

Did— did he hear Jeongguk call him… angel…  

“How’d you sleep last night?” Jeongguk was smiling so… so softly .

Something was… something was different. The blue hues that usually lingered in his eyes were gone. Or was Taehyung hallucinating? 

“You okay?” Jeongguk asked, walking closer.

“Huh— oh— yes! Uh— are you okay?” Taehyung spluttered, “What’s going on?”

“Can I have a hug?” Jeongguk asked casually. 

“I— sure?” 

Chuckling, Jeongguk closed the distance between them, taking Taehyung in his arms. 

“Jeongguk?” Taehyung wrapped his arms around his waist, settling his head on Jeongguk’s shoulders.

“You okay, right?” he asked again, only getting a soft nod against his own shoulder in return. 

“Baked us cake,” Jeongguk sighed, breath hitting Taehyung ears, making him shiver just faintly in his arms.

“When!? I thought we dropped that idea after our flour war,” Taehyung giggled as yesterday’s flour war memories flowed back in his mind.

That was so fun!

Taehyung broke the hug, giggling at the little whines of protest Jeongguk sent his way, and walked behind the counter, taking the miraculous sight that was this morning’s breakfast.

“Jeongguk… You—” 

“You made this much food again!?” Taehyung exclaimed, stunned at the spread in front of him.

There were strawberry waffles; Taehyung didn’t even know they had a waffle maker!? And there were snickerdoodle cookies with cinnamon sprinkled on the top, and of course, there was that cake Jeongguk was talking about, and bacon and eggs with some boiled spinach as a side dish. 

“This...” Taehyung breathed out, “this is too much food, Gugkie, we still have leftovers from last night!”

“Ggukie…” Jeongguk whispered in a daze, “oh.”

“S- sorry, I just, sorry,” Taehyung apologized; he had used a pet name yesterday as well, countless times.

Taehyung, you idiot! Where is that grip you were getting! 

“No!” Jeongguk exclaimed loudly, startling Taehyung, “no, it’s— yeah— only call me that from now on.”

Pink pixie dust gathered on Jeongguk’s cheeks, making Taehyung wonder if it was him who was in a fever dream or was it Jeongguk. 

“Uh— anyway!” 

“Let’s get to eating all this festive food, I guess!” Taehyung beamed, his stomach gurgling at the sight and smells of the festive food. 

“It’s not even Christmas anymore, Ggukie, why’d you make so much!?” Taehyung slid on the stool as Jeongguk plated their food, placing Taehyung’s in front of him first, and pouring him a mug of fresh cinnamon coffee. 

From now on, huh?  

Jeongguk asked to call him only Ggukie… from now on. 

If there was a now on in their lives, Taehyung also wanted to ask Jeongguk to make him breakfast every morning just like this.  

“Every day should be Christmas. I’m kinda sad it’s not a law,” Jeongguk mumbled, making Taehyung laugh loudly. 

“What does that even mean!? A law to make breakfast this sumptuous every day?” 

“That, and —” Jeongguk kept his own plate and mug near Taehyung’s, and quickly took his seat. 

“One Christmas miracle each day,” he smiled. 

“Oh.”

“That— that actually sounds not bad,” Taehyung agreed, deep in thought. 

That way maybe— maybe they could even get to live like this, inside a cozy little cabin, reliving their little Christmas miracles every day.

Taehyung stirred from his thoughts, taking a big mouthful of waffles and immediately sighing in utter ecstasy at the taste of it, the creamy goodness inside filled with strawberries, oh, Heavens, Jeongguk had magic in him, that was the only explanation for food to taste this good from his hands.

“By the way.” Taehyung proceeded to ask him something, but Jeongguk’s hand neared his face, wiping the cream that was smeared on his lips and licking it clean. 

Oh. God. Taehyung was, once again, reminded how hot Jeongguk made him all over, out of nowhere— Illegal, illegal, make this illegal. At once.

“Taehyung? You were saying?” 

“Oh— yeah.” Taehyung cleared his throat. “The snowstorm! Are the roads still blocked?” he asked, heart beating in time with his words, hoping Jeongguk would say—

“Yep.”

Oh. Sweet relief . Yet another day he could spend with Jeong—

Wait a minute.

Taehyung looked outside the window.

Unlike yesterday, the world wasn’t as white, the ground was wet, but it wasn’t covered with snow. 

“Are— are you sure?” he asked again, squinting in suspicion.

“Yep.” Jeongguk simply shrugged, not even looking outside the window.

“The highway’s still blocked. Granny said it’s better to just— Stay , you know.”

Uh huh.

“Right,” Taehyung smiled.

Liar, you know I can really smell lies. 

“Yeah..” Jeongguk shrugged again. 

“How many days have you booked this place for?” he asked with a mouthful. 

“Granny didn’t tell you that?” Taehyung smirked, making Jeongguk pout. 

“Nope, attorney-client privilege.”

Taehyung laughed loudly.

“That’s a lawyer! Do I look stupid, Jeongguk, is that it!?” he wheezed out.

It was nice, so, so nice.

Taehyung was happy. The way Jeongguk’s own face lit up at Taehyung’s happiness, no amount of Christmas miracles could perhaps come close to this. 

“So? How many more days?” 

“Till tomorrow,” Taehyung replied, sadness spreading in his heart.

In a few days, it would be his birthday. He would turn 33, and for some reason, he really, really wanted to start another year of his life, and quite literally start a new year with Jeongguk. 

“Hmm,” Jeongguk hummed, “and what will you do once you go back?”

“Um? What’d you mean what I’ll do? Live, I guess?” Taehyung chuckled.

“No, I mean, the day after. 28th, do you have any plans?” 

Huh… 

“I… guess not?” 

“So.” Jeongguk straightened his back and turned to Taehyung. 

“Wanna go on a date? With me?”

Taehyung choked on his food.

“A— a what !?” 

“A date? You know? Where we can go to a pretty restaurant, hold hands, sit under the stars on an open ground and just talk all night. All that romantic stuff?” 

Taehyung gulped. Those were some really good ideas for dates. 

“I… I’m aware of the concept, Gguk. All of a sudden?” 

All of a sudden? Was it all of a sudden? Wasn’t this what he was hoping all along? 

“I mean...” Jeongguk took a long breath as if bracing himself.

“Why not? I find myself liking being with you a lot, a lot. And if— if you like this too, if you want— maybe we could— find ways to be together back home too?” He fidgeted on the stool, adding, “Only if you want!”

“I— Ggukie, I—” Taehyung stammered, unable to get himself to form his fears into words.

I want that, I do. But I’m scared. I’m scared I’ll drive you away like I did Bogum… 

“I really want that— but—”

He was left to swallow his thoughts. 

“I’m— I’m not—” 

“Hey, hey, breathe. ” Jeongguk calmed him instantly, coming closer, both hands on Taehyung’s shoulders, guiding his breath. Taehyung was thankful for that. 

“What’s going on, Tae?” Jeongguk asked, a worried expression on his face. 

“I’m not— I’m not— I don’t know, m- maybe I’m not right for you, Gguk, for anyone,” Taehyung forced his words out.

Maybe these days were happy because that was all they were, a few days far away from the clutches of reality, and Taehyung was worried sick if he went back home, despite wanting to see Jeongguk again, he would most certainly ruin it all, these happy days, their little Christmas miracle that could forever remain unsullied. 

Because that was what Taehyung did, wasn’t it?

He was a ghost after all.

Turning his stool towards Taehyung, Jeongguk closed the distance between them, their thighs touching just barely.

“Hey, I can assure you that’s not the case. You’re amazing, Taehyung. You’re very fascinating to me, I haven’t met anyone like you before. And I just want to get to know you deeper. If you’re feeling insecure because of your ex and need some time, then I understand, you literally just got out of a long-term relationship. I’m not asking you to commit.” His voice was soft, like his eyes. 

Taehyung reminded himself it wasn’t Bogum he was with, it was Jeongguk, and Jeongguk was kind, gentle, and he was understanding. 

“Just, just hang around, you know, like friends but with the intention of being more than friends, someday. If life lets us.” 

Taehyung took a long breath, trying to clear his chest of any heaviness that lingered. Because— wasn’t that exactly what he wished for… a far away someday ?

“That… that— yeah— that sounds good,” Taehyung breathed slowly. 

“Yeah?”

“Yeah,” he smiled, mimicking Jeongguk’s sweet smile.

“Then— that’s all we’ll do, okay?” 

Taehyung nodded.

“Your break up is not on you, Taehyung. You’re not the only one to blame, if at all. It takes two hands to clap,” Jeongguk whispered, “relationships are a two-way street, right? Unless you’re into polygamy, that is.”

Taehyung burst into a peal of laughter, Jeongguk’s own chuckles followed. 

“You’re right, not about the polygamy bit though, I’m not into that.” 

“I’ll do my best, Jeongguk.” Taehyung promised.

“So will I,” Jeongguk smiled, ruffling Taehyung’s already messy bed hair. It was the third time he was doing that in a span of one and a half days. Oh, fun , what fun future lay ahead of him, Taehyung could only wonder. 

The two continued their breakfast in comfortable silence. But something hit Taehyung. 

“Gguk?” he hushed, making Jeongguk hum from the side. 

“The roads aren’t blocked anymore, are they?”

“Nope. Not even slightly.” 

Taehyung shook his head, laughing.

“Wanna watch movies the whole day?”

“Yes! Marvel marathon, starting with Iron Man! Please say yes, Ggukie.”

“Marvel marathon, it is! And oh, before I forget, can you send me that photo you took yesterday? Of the snow angel and me?”

“Okay! I’ll transfer it to my lappy! Gimme your number, pleaase~ ”

“Here—”

“Look at us, already exchanging numbers! How enthralling!”

“Yes, crucial steps towards the great perhaps.”

“Oh please, the great perhaps already passed before we met— it’s almost magical, isn’t it!? What if it really was a Christmas miracle, Ggukie!? What will we do then?”

“Hm? Live happily ever after? Isn’t that how the movies go?”

“Not those slasher horror ones! Oh! I know! We should totally watch Cabin in the Woods tonight!”

“Only if you cuddle me in those fluffy bear jammies.”

“Deal!” 

“Eat your food now, come on.”

“Yes, sir!”

“You know what I was thinking, Ggukie!? What if Granny Song really did turn out to be a killer… wouldn’t that be a great plot twist!? Too bad I don’t write mysteries... ”

“Taehyung, love, just eat the food, Granny is nowhere near a killer, I promise you. If anything, she’s a fairy? Or an angel?”

“Angel!? Really!?”

“Yep! Like my baby sister.”

“And my mama!”

“The two snow angels we sealed on the ground.” 

“Like them!”

“Come on, now hush little angel, let's eat.”

“Mmkay!” 

Soft little snowflakes tinkled as they fell somewhere in the distant sky.

An angel flapped her wings somewhere ever farther away, and more snowstorms stirred across the seven oceans from the little cabin in the woods. She sprinkled glimmering pixie dust on the fated ones tied in an invisible bond, yet to cross each other’s paths. 

And somewhere deep in another part of the world, more angels cried, guiding loved ones to each other, seeing them weep as they tumbled and fell on their way. But the ones meant for each other did find one another, at last. At last.  

It was the beginning of yet another Christmas miracle. One for each, and every one of us.