Chapter Text
It wasn’t before long before things began to gain a sense of normalcy.
The novelty faded, like a child’s prized new toy receiving its first scratch.
The illustriousness disappears, and the newness of it all becomes much less apparent. But once the first dent has been made, and something is no longer new, the fear of tarnishing it fades and the love for the item deepens. A closer bond is formed, it becomes less novel and more comfortable, alongside a sense of stability. This increases the sustainability of the relationship, when it is safe to love something untethered. The fear of losing it is gone, and the domestic banalities become the greatest pleasures.
However, the deeper something becomes, the innate human need to continue to push remains.
Satisfaction isn’t part of mankind’s nature, no matter how little or how much a man has.
Andrew was no different, and was human as anyone else.
So, when he had made mention of a particular subject for the first time, Aesop could feel the beating in his chest stop, and time froze.
He’d given the other man such an uncharacteristically expressive look of surprise, it sent Kreiss into an extensive depressive episode.
Unfortunately, when Andrew became like this, there was no changing his mind. When he came to a specific conclusion on his own, no amount of comforting could make him feel any different.
It was usually up to time to comfort him.
Eventually, when his feelings would dissipate, rational thinking would return, and the clouds over his head would clear, he’d come sheepishly groveling back.
Just the moments of silence between those times were difficult to bear.
“So, you don’t want to… You’d hate to be trapped with a beast like me forever, wouldn’t you!” He had hissed, his teeth gnashing, and his frantic eyes burning.
“Andrew. No. That is not tr-“
Aesop raised his hands in a guarded position, but the other man advanced quickly, his hands balled into fists.
“Save it. I know what you think. Don’t even try to cover it up!”
And that was that.
The gravekeeper turned on his heels and slunk upstairs to hide away in their bedroom.
When Aesop heard the door shut, he sighed, wondering how things could get heated so quickly.
The despairing moans of anguish drifting down the stairs didn’t much help either.
Not moments earlier the two of them were spending some quality time together.
Andrew had taken up cooking recently, and they planned to prepare a rhubarb trifle to share for the holiday season. Carl was more than happy to retrieve the ingredients, but even stranger, Andrew had been adamant about coming along. They’d traveled to town together, but the gravekeeper was silent all day. Every so often, Aesop would catch the man stealing furtive glances, and walking in a guarded hunch.
This wasn’t out of the ordinary really, but the embalmer’s suspicions were raised.
He kept silent himself, thinking to inquire about Kreiss’ mood when they returned home, but as they’d laid their ingredients out on the counter, Andrew brought up a topic that had shocked his partner.
“Aesop… Do you suppose you’d consider marriage? Marriage with me?”
It was clear how badly Andrew had been burning to ask such a question, and Carl wondered just how long he’d been internalizing it.
The mortician had whipped around to stare at him in shock, and that was when things got heated.
Now he stood alone with himself, staring at a cluster of ingredients and feeling remorseful that their time had been cut so short.
The man sighed deeply, putting them away with a solemn expression. Hopefully, Andrew would be well enough later or tomorrow, and they can make the treat together. Ingredients didn’t last, and he didn’t much feel like cooking anymore.
“Marriage!”
Aesop spat to himself.
He could laugh!
Or cry.
The gravekeeper clearly didn’t understand that it would be impossible for the two of them, and Carl didn’t particularly feel like explaining why.
The other man knew well enough that public displays of affection were forbidden between the two of them, but Aesop began to wonder just how deeply Andrew really understood. Despite his devotion to the Bible, Andrew didn’t really seem to realize how taboo their relations would be viewed. Alongside his wordless devotion to the ‘word of God’, the older man also often accepted whatever Aesop said as fact, with little to no question.
So it wouldn’t be inappropriate to assume this was one of those cases.
The embalmer himself didn’t much care for the concept of marriage, nor did he particularly find it intriguing. However, he knew it must be important to Andrew, and he wondered how long he’d been keeping his feelings inside.
Aesop knew he would have some explaining to do, but in the meantime, he’d focus on getting some cleaning done, which was in his immediate control.
Andrew on the other hand lay in bed, nestled in the sheets.
He knew he shouldn’t have been so accusatory towards the other man, and guilt plagued him.
Anyone would be surprised by such a sudden question, and never had Aesop made him feel like a monster. Nor did he ever imply that he didn’t want to be with him.
But now the damage had been done, and Kreiss couldn’t so much as move a muscle, he was paralyzed with shame and guilt. His feelings were complicated, despite how close they’d become, he had so much difficulty accepting it.
At least he wasn’t tearful and wailing anymore. What a humiliating and pitiful display.
“You’ve gotten too comfortable.” He murmured to himself, taking hold of his pale locks and tugging them for a distraction. “Asking such a silly question.”
Grunting, he snuggled further into the bedsheets, feeling sorry for himself.
No matter how many assurances he received, he couldn’t fully accept that he was capable of being loved. It wasn’t as though he distrusted Aesop, but it was impossible to conceive that he could harbor any warm feelings towards him. Andrew felt ugly, stupid, he believed wholly that Aesop was far better than he was, or ever will be.
Yes, he knew by now he could trust him. But once distrust was out of the way, Andrew’s low self-esteem became their main issue.
The older man desperately sought affection, but grew embarrassed at many of Carl’s advances, or dismissed any praise.
Sometimes, he could allow himself to receive tenderness, but more often than not, it came alongside guilt and shame.
Thoughts of unworthiness plagued his mind, and feelings of ugliness haunted him constantly.
Despite how he viewed himself, he wanted to be married as anyone else.
He pouted to himself, lower lip trembling as a stray tear snaked down his pallid cheek and into the sheets.
He wanted to be married in a church!
He was tired of being content with less, lately all he wanted was more!
And marriage was binding. Not only would it be proof of Aesop’s love for him, but their relationship would feel even more real to him. He’d long since idealized the concept of marriage, so he knew he needed this.
“I suppose I ought to get some sleep, then.” He grunted to himself, kicking out of his pants and pulling the bedsheets over his head.
Traveling to town always tired him out, and being emotionally spent also came with its fair share of exhaustion.
Yes, sleep would be best. The issue with his companion could wait.
The day had passed by, and Aesop watched the clock with a vacant expression.
It watched him in return, and clicked dutifully, its hands lazily sliding along its face.
The embalmer had eaten dinner and now relaxed in the parlor with some tea, but Andrew (who should be awake at this time), did not return. The embalmer clicked his tongue and stood, thinking it best if he go upstairs to ensure the man was even awake. He should be heading out to work by now, and it would be unfortunate if he didn’t get his duties done in the yard.
Carl trudged up the stairs and peered into their bedroom carefully.
“Andrew?” He called softly, staring into the darkness of the room.
There was no response, and Aesop flicked the lights on. His eyebrows raised at the empty spot on the bed, and he frowned.
Turning the lights off, he made down the hall and into the foyer. Andrew’s boots and coat weren’t in their spot by the door, and the man felt his heart stir.
Andrew must have left for the night without saying goodbye, which was unlike him.
Kreiss was avoidant, but he had yet to leave without a ‘goodbye’ or an ‘I love you’.
With an exasperated sigh, Carl removed his slippers and slid into a pair of shoes he reserved for outside use. He opened the front door and grimaced at the cold wind that gushed forth and stung his cheeks and nose. He stepped into the cold night, hands tucked into the pockets of his pajamas, and began to meander through the yards. He could see clearly a light in the near distance, which he assumed was from Andrew’s hourglass, and approached it with a firm expression.
As he drew nearer, the image of Andrew crouched over a headstone came into view.
Aesop approached him from behind, his shoes crunching in the fresh fallen snow.
Kreiss could not hear him over the howl of the wind, and polished the headstone thoughtlessly.
“Andrew!” Aesop called out, now wrapping his arms around himself tightly to keep warm.
The gravekeeper jumped at his voice and stood quickly, turning to his partner with a worried expression.
“What are you doing out here? In this cold? You go back inside before you get sick, now.” He spoke very firmly, his eyebrows furrowing and jaw set. He almost sounded paternal, and Aesop didn’t care for it.
Aesop raised his eyebrows in surprise. “You didn’t say goodbye before leaving.”
Andrew seemed to be avoiding eye contact, and he shrugged as he turned back to the headstone.
“No reason. Just left, is all. I didn’t mean anything by it.” The man replied quickly, avoiding eye contact by busying with the stone.
The embalmer stared at the man work. He probably thought that half-hearted reply would be sufficient, and Aesop would return to the home.
But Carl was stubborn, and he tapped Kreiss’ rump with the tip of his shoe.
“I’m not satisfied with that response.”
Aesop could see Andrew grip the brush he’d been using on the tombstone tightly, and the mortician wondered for a brief moment if he should do as the other man said and just go home. But he was very strong-willed and stubborn, and he would content himself with standing there until Andrew conceded.
“You can stand there all night, I’m not budging.” Andrew grumbled, scrubbing the stone with a frustrated intensity.
He cleaned for a bit, long enough to have almost forgotten Carl was still there, before peeking back over his shoulder to see if the embalmer still stood behind him.
And he did.
“By God!” Kreiss moaned exasperatedly, standing up from the ground.
Aesop did his best to hide the smile that crept on his lips, relishing in how quickly it took for Andrew to concede. Kreiss scowled as he took notice of the other man’s developing smile, and promptly took hold of his shoulders with firm fingers. A part of him was finding itself with a short temper, but the other part of him swelled at the idea of being desired enough for Aesop to bear the cold like this.
Still gripping Carl’s shoulders, he turned him around and adjusted his hands to grip his waist from behind. Then, pushing him forward, he escorted him back into the direction of their home. The embalmer didn’t seem to be putting up a fight, and willingly allowed himself to be directed. They trudged on in silence, the only sounds filling their ears being the whipping of wind through their clothes and hair, and the crunch of snow beneath their feet.
“So-” Aesop began, still allowing Andrew to urge him forward. “What’s gotten into you?”
He could hear his partner sigh behind him, and he craned his neck to study his expression.
The man looked indisputably sad, and Carl stopped in his steps, turning around to peer into Andrew’s eyes.
“What’s gotten into you?” He repeated, bringing his hand up to carefully stroke the gravekeeper’s pale cheek.
A decently uncommon expression of affection on Aesop’s part.
Andrew leaned into the touch, closing his despondent eyes and frowning deeply. The older man brought his own hand up to rest atop Carl’s, and he pressed it more firmly onto his cheek. He felt inclined to explain his behavior, but found quickly that the words died on his tongue.
“I’m afraid I don’t know how to properly answer, but...” He spoke up finally, opening his eyes and offering a pleading look. “I want to be married!”
Aesop clicked his tongue and removed his hand from Andrew’s cheek, furrowing his brows thoughtfully and crossing his arms. He should have known the man would still be caught up on the subject... There had to be a solution the two of them could come to… The gears in his brain turned as he did his best to mull it over.
Thinking it best not to dwell on this topic now that he reached a silent conclusion, he nodded briskly and turned back around. Though he’d dropped the discussion quickly to spare Andrew’s feelings, it had the opposite effect of what the mortician intended. Andrew’s stomach plummeted as his partner turned away from him, feeling more rejected than he had prior.
He dropped his hands to his sides and frowned.
“I trust you know your way back home.” He half-joked, feigning a good mood in hopes to be left alone as quickly as possible.
Aesop turned his head to peer over at him with a nod and a smile. “Yes. Goodnight.”
Kreiss nodded and faked another grin, watching the man’s sleek figure drift ghost-like across the snow. Aesop didn’t look back again, and eventually his thin frame was swallowed by the darkness. Andrew released the breath he’d been holding, and turned to return to his work, shoulders slumping dismally. He felt heavy, clawing desperately in his mind to understand what Aesop’s reaction could possibly mean. There was no other way for him to comprehend what he’d seen in a way that didn’t align with what he’s always known.
The fear that he might lose Aesop became blaringly apparent in his mind, and he couldn’t bear with the thought that he might leave him.
There was an all-consuming fear of rejection.
Without the knowledge of how to navigate a waning relationship, he felt clingier than ever, and decided Aesop may just require him to give him more affection.
So the rest of the night was spent fretting over how to maintain his lover’s attention and affection, musing over this and that while he fulfilled his duties.
When the yardwork had been attended to, and the dreadful sun began its ascent, the gravedigger decided it was time to turn in for the rest of the night.
However… He still hadn’t come to a decision on how to grovel to Carl.
He sighed as he made his way to the funeral home, dragging his feet. It was too cold to decide outside, and a relaxing sit by the fire might enliven him.
The man sat, red eyes blazing back at the fire burning in the hearth. It was a difficult decision, but he supposed something simple would be the best start. He’d get Aesop some flowers. Offering the man such a lovely gift would do a perfect job of expressing his remorse.
There was a creaking behind him, and Kreiss whipped his head around towards the sound.
A fully dressed Carl stood in the entryway, peering at him dully.
“Good morning my dear.” Aesop greeted stiffly, nodding his head. “You should be headed to bed by now, Andrew.”
“Good morning- Ah, is that so…” The older man peered at the clock, noticing that it had indeed passed his regularly scheduled bedtime.
“I am going to be terribly busy in the morgue today. If you happen to wake up during the course of the day, do not bother me.” Aesop continued to speak, moving over to Andrew deftly and taking a hold of his shoulder with a gloved hand. “Do you understand?”
“Oh, yes, I understand. I won’t bother you.”
Kreiss grinned to himself, trying to mask his excitement.
This worked perfectly in his favor.
The gravekeeper could take advantage of this to head to town while Aesop worked.
He removed himself from the armchair with a nod and a smile, and clunked upstairs and into their bedroom. A quick nap would do him some good, and if Aesop was as busy as he said he would be, it permitted the perfect time to sneak out... Slipping out from his dress shirt and pants, he clambered into bed and snuggled contentedly into the sheets. Kreiss fell asleep very quickly.
When he finally awoke, he sat up in a hurry and peered blearily at the window to see strings of light creeping from behind the veil of curtains. It must be late in the morning by now, presumably 11 am.
Today was Monday, so it was safe to assume that the town would be bustling, but he wouldn’t be deterred.
The man shimmied out from the tangle of bedsheets, stepping out of bed with a yawn and a stretch. He scooped up the discarded clothing from early this morning, sliding into them with drowsy body language.
Aesop was undoubtedly working at this time, but despite this fact, he opened the door to their bedroom slowly, taking a peek down the hall. He did his best to tiptoe through the hall and down the stairs. Whipping his head around, he seemed to be in the clear, and he chuckled mischievously to himself as he stepped outside. As he crept into the sunlight, he squinted against the permeating light, raising his hands to shield his eyes.
The air was crisp and chilly, but not insufferable. Though he had hoped for a cloudier day…
“Curses.” He hissed, gritting his teeth and scowling.
“Well… I suppose I haven’t got much choice.”
With that said, he inhaled deeply in efforts to conjure the courage to make the journey to town.
When he arrived, he already felt himself growing paranoid over the bustle of life around him.
People surrounded him on every side, and he knew very well he wasn’t well-liked by the townspeople, given his appearance and occupation.
It wasn’t uncommon for the town’s children to dare one another to come by the graveyard at night, giggling and shrieking as they watched him work. It made him fearful, and he kept to himself on the off-chance any of the townsfolk felt so inclined to target him.
But he was determined to find a gift for Aesop, and wouldn’t allow himself to be deterred so easily.
As he strolled deeper into town, he found that the shops became more particular, and the mass of people grew. It was nearing Christmas day, and plenty of people were doing some last minute looking around the market before the holiday.
It wasn't often, but on the rare occasion Andrew found the ability to distance himself from his body, he was able to observe others objectively, without considering his place in their world.
Today, people seemed so pre-occupied with themselves, no one bothered to steal a glance.
Lights decorated the buildings and red ribbons adorned the streetlamps. Couples strode down the pavement smiling and arm in arm, vendors called out from their stands, children chased one another down the streets giggling, and families happily huddled up to keep warm while doing their shopping. Andrew couldn’t hide a smile as he watched, feeling his heart tug and stomach flutter. The smell of roasted chestnuts drifted into the air, paired with the crisp scent of winter, and he inhaled happily.
It was divine, and Kreiss desperately wished Aesop was there to accompany him.
He wanted to stroll arm in arm like the couples on the street, huddling close and carefree.
He loved how Carl’s ashen skin became pink from the cold. His cheeks and ears tinging so cutely. The idea of kissing Aesop in the streets, as snow drifted around them and lights flickered like stars, filled him with joy.
He’d always wanted a winter wedding.
The reminder of a wedding tore him from his daydream, and he hurried along.
Once he’d located the proper shop, he quickly stepped inside and away from the chill of outside. A little bell rang above him as he entered, and he rubbed his hands together as warmth surrounded him.
“Happy to be out of the cold?” A girl’s voice chimed from behind the counter, and Andrew quickly averted his gaze to the floor with a nod.
“Oh, yes.” He mumbled, wringing his hands and shifting on his feet.
The girl approached him, infiltrating his personal space, and staring up at him with her gentle eyes.
Kreiss felt fear strike him, and he blushed as she peered up.
She had a lovely caramel complexion, and her cheeks were dappled with charming freckles.
“Can I help you find anything?” She asked politely.
“I’m…” He couldn’t reply and found himself too shy to articulate any of his thoughts.
The young woman seemed to sense his discomfort and stepped away from him.
He watched her as she trotted around the store, plucking a bouquet of poinsettias, and presenting it to him.
“These are really popular this season, would you like to try these?”
Kreiss didn’t reply, but approached the counter slowly, nodding with a gruff mumble and plucking some coins from his pocket.
“Okay!” She chimed happily, packing the flowers up nicely in a paper bag to preserve their safety before offering them to him.
Andrew paid the girl with shaky fingers and took the bag silently, turning around and heading out the store. He wanted to be out of there quickly and avoid socializing further.
But as he turned to leave, a flash of silver fell into sight from outside, and Andrew dashed to the corner of the store to hide.
“Um… Is everything okay?” The shopkeeper inquired with raised eyebrows.
“Yes, yes, so sorry.” Kreiss cleared his throat and inched towards the window, grabbing a nearby potted plant to hide behind. He knew how glaringly he stood out, and he didn’t want to leave the store until he knew it was safe.
Though seeing Aesop in town was unexpected, the man had stated insistently that he would be in the morgue for the greater part of the day, and not to disturb him under any circumstances. Earlier, Andrew had shrugged it off as one of Carl’s moods, but he hasn’t lied like this yet.
Actually, Aesop didn’t lie at all.
Andrew squinted his eyes to see better, willing them to stay still long enough for him to focus properly.
Aesop appeared to be discussing something with a sweets vendor. Despite the uncertainty of this situation, he hoped the sweets were for him.
But he caught sight of something that made him nauseated.
Another man seemed to be accompanying the embalmer.
A very handsome man, who had a hand on Aesop's shoulder, which ran down slowly to pat his back.
This sent a chill through Andrew’s body that coursed through as a violent shiver and settled as a black ball in his chest.
Kreiss didn’t recognize the man, he’d never seen him before.
But he was good looking and young, with brown tufty hair and a strong chin and jaw.
He watched Aesop smile in the man’s direction, and the two huddled close to inspect the vendor’s wares.
Time really seemed to stop, and it was taking all of his strength to stand upright and keep his knees from buckling.
“Um-“
Andrew gasped and whipped around, forgetting he was in a public space, much less a cute and sweet girl’s flower shop.
She stood close to him with an inquisitive expression on her adorable features.
“Are you alright? You’ve got quite the grip on my plant there.”
Kreiss’ face had drained of any remaining color, and he looked as sorry as if he’d been left out in the rain.
He forced a nod and peeled his lips back in a strained grin, awkwardly setting down the plant he had used to hide behind earlier.
She still stared curiously, and unfortunately his feelings were much too strong to fake. He turned away to moan in misery, his large hands flying up to mask his face as he pitied himself. Why else would Aesop lie to spend time with such a handsome man, if not to enjoy a romantic venture? With a man such as himself, ugly and wretched, anyone would find themselves at their wits end and seek other company.
The poor girl stared with wide eyes at this random customer having a bizarre emotional outburst in her store, frantically thinking up something to do. She took a firm grip on his shoulder.
“Um. Is something the matter?”
“I’m so sorry. Please forgive me, and- Thank you for the flowers, of course. Have a nice day, now. Merry Christmas to you.”
With another look out the window, the two appeared to have gone. Taking this chance to scramble out, he burst through the door and into the cold, leaving the poor girl confused.
Things didn’t seem as cheerful as they had when he first entered town, now he felt bitter and overcome with misery. His body felt leaden, and his thoughts were spiraling out of control. Despite his feelings of bitterness, in the end how could he blame the embalmer?
The flash of Aesop’s silver hair had returned, and Andrew did his best to duck into the crowd, using the poinsettias to hide his pale hair. He hated even more than before how visibly he stood out, and he cursed his poor vision that would make spying impossible.
It was best to leave before he was seen, despite his urge to follow them and make certain this wasn’t infidelity.
Hurrying along, he dragged himself through the crowd and into the direction of their home.
When Andrew returned, he stole a peek into the morgue, feeling his heart squeeze at Aesop’s absence.
He didn’t have it in him to interrogate his partner, he was very well spent. And why should he?
It was clear that Carl had been with another man, this much was obvious.
They had to have been close if Aesop of all people would allow himself to be touched so intimately, if at all.
It was only a matter of time before the embalmer would request Kreiss pack what little he owns and leave for good. Andrew didn’t want to give Aesop that control, so he took it upon himself to take matters into his own hands. With a scowl, he dragged himself upstairs.
“If he doesn’t want me anymore, well… I understand.” He choked to himself, feeling his vision blur further as tears sprang to his eyes.
It was foolish of him to think there was a happy end, and that a relationship would ever be sustainable for him. Andrew felt cruel for asking for more when clearly the other man was trying his hardest to keep things together as is. So, he decided to make things easier for Aesop, who cared enough about Andrew’s feelings to keep the other relationship a secret. As an act of mercy, Andrew would go away. A goodbye would be unnecessary, and there was no need to take the clothing and other gifts Aesop had purchased for him when they moved in together. Staying in town wouldn’t be a possibility, so he had to go away somewhere for good. He scoured their room for his own belongings, but found little outside of a rosary, few articles of clothing, and some Bibles. Able to pack it all in his arms, he turned on his heels to head downstairs.
The gravedigger was highly impulsive and emotionally volatile, both conditioned responses for self-preservation.
He would leave before he was asked to go, it was a simple matter of shielding himself from a scenario he had contrived in his head.
He trudged down the hallway and stormed down the stairs, but found himself frozen once he had reached the end.
Aesop stood staring at him with a cocked eyebrow, and a worried look in his eyes.
“I saw you in town. Why are you carrying your things? What are you doing?”
The older man pushed past him, grunting in response.
“Nothing, just leave me be.”
The younger man was entirely clueless as to what was happening, but sensing Andrew was having one of his moments, he quickly took hold of the other man’s arm.
He’d have to get to his point quickly if he didn’t want Andrew to get worse. He always spiraled so horribly.
“You’ve been insecure for the past several weeks.”
That much was obvious, but Aesop hadn’t given him the attention he needed, and deserved.
“I’m so sorry it got to this point. I shouldn’t have ignored your pain for so long, so please give me another chance before you do something serious.”
Carl seemed to grasp the severity of the situation, despite still being unaware of any of the fears Andrew had, or the negative feelings he’d been experiencing for the past while.
And Andrew rarely pouted outside of their bedroom like this, or made a spectacle of things, he just tended to nest under the sheets.
Now, he carried several articles of clothing and some of his other belongings, and seemed ready to walk out the door.
“Are you thinking about leaving?”
The mortician asked with a stupefied expression, his fixed features uncharacteristically exaggerated with his surprise.
It was completely out of nowhere, and such an intense response, he couldn't even begin to try and mask his confusion.
It took a moment, but Andrew nodded, his bangs curtaining his face as he hung his head.
“Well, I figure it would be best for you, wouldn’t it? You don’t have to keep any secrets anymore.”
The younger man was getting a touch impatient now, seeing as this explosive reaction was to something he had absolutely no awareness of.
“And what secrets are you referring to?”
“That new friend of yours, of course.”
Andrew turned and stared at his partner with a determined but despairing look in his eyes.
Aesop squinted in confusion for a bit before it finally clicked, and his brows raised.
“Andrew, that’s an old friend of mine. He’s married, he has a wife.”
The gravedigger scoffed, crossing his arms. He’d made up his mind and he was assured in his observation. Anything Aesop told him was a cover-up, he’d already decided.
“I said you don’t have to keep secrets, anymore!”
Carl turned away to keep Andrew from seeing the grin that tugged at the corners of his lips.
Did he really think he was having an affair?
Is that what this was about?
The gravity of the situation set in, however, and the thought of Andrew leaving for good without a word was devastating. His smile faded, and he adjusted his shirt and turned around.
“Andrew, he’s married. Do you know why I met with him in town? Especially during such a busy holiday season? And you know I hate crowds.”
The circumstances weren’t what he had planned for at all, and he had done some planning over the past several weeks.
As always, Andrew seemed to be full of surprises, so a little adjustment to his original plan was necessary, he supposed.
Especially with circumstances as dire as these.
“Actually, I needed his help with something. But I couldn’t tell you. It’s a Christmas present.”
“You don’t celebrate Christmas.”
“Well, I do for you. This is yours.”
The older man watched carefully as Aesop plucked something from his pocket and stepped forward.
He took Andrew’s large, rough fingers in his slender digits, slipping a band onto his left ring finger.
“Do you see? I wanted to be married to you, too, but I needed some help from somebody else who knew what he was doing.”
Andrew stood with his jaw slack and face red.
How could he come to such a terrible conclusion, when Aesop was planning to do this?
Dropping his belongings and falling to his knees, he threw his hands in his face to hide his expression.
Aesop lowered himself to his knees as well, taking Andrew’s knees in his hands.
“Please don’t ever leave me. I’m really begging you not to, no matter how challenging things become-"
"-I couldn’t bear to be without you. And to leave without a word would really devastate me."
His dark eyes were beseeching.
"Why can’t you understand the impact you have on me, and how much I love you?”
Andrew could only listen with his face in his hands, crying as silently as he could.
He breathed against the surface of his hands, and couldn’t imagine how unsightly he’d become from emotion.
“I’m sorry,” he apologized. “I just decided for myself what was happening. I’m a coward, you know that.”
“Coward or not, you can’t leave me behind. I hope you won’t ever leave me behind. If you go, I’ll go, too.”
Reaching up, Aesop gingerly moved Andrew’s hands from his face, which was red and wet with tears.
“So, let’s be married.”