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"Good day Draco!"
"Alex." Draco Malfoy said with a nod, acknowledging her greeting with a smile. "Granger." He added, the smile extended to the head girl, before he continued walking past them.
"I hate to be a bad friend but, I'm sitting with the Slytherins. Can you even see how those robes do magic on him?" Alex Russo whispered to Hermione. "He's always looked like that." The latter responded.
Alex stood up from her seat taking her plate with her. "I'll chat with you later. I might miss the chance. I should have known the rumors were true. He is very popular."
Hermione can only follow Alex with her gaze. She hasn't really told the witch about her and Malfoy being an item before. She didn't see the need for it. Until now. When he smiled at her for the first time after breaking up.
He smiled at me.
It was all Hermione could think about in class. So much so that due to her lack of focus, Ron managed to do better than her at Potions. This even prompted Harry to check on her by asking her if she was not feeling well.
Of course she wouldn't tell her best friends, Draco Malfoy has been in her mind since breakfast. In a good way. Damn that smile! Certainly not when he deducted 20 points from Gryffindor -- although valid, Head Boy duties -- when a first year was caught wandering the corridors last night.
"Are you for real?"
It was Alex. Hermione saw the witch just a couple of tables from where she was reading a book. And here she thought, there will be very few people in the library. Her new friend looked at her ex-boyfriend in awe. He just pulled a chair for her.
"Alright, I won't do it anymore." She heard Draco Malfoy say. She also heard a subtle laugh coming from the wizard. "No, by all means, do it frequently. It was just an expression." Alex answered.
It was all what it took for Hermione to suddenly get a flashback. She remembered having a similar conversation with him. She too asked him if he was for real and he told her the same thing he said to Alex. The only difference was the response they gave. She told him, 'good'.
From that point forward, Hermione kept seeing Alex and Draco together. Not that she was following them. It just started happening for her again. Not seeing someone so close a proximity to you if you don't pay attention then seeing them all the time after meeting them once.
She watched as Draco Malfoy stared at Alex Russo as he wandlessly tied her hair for her and read the 'thank you' passing from her lips. He used to do that for her without her permission too. And she remembers not thanking him for it.
"I mean can you find a more thoughtful person than him? He wandlessly tied my hair because I can't see crap -- sorry for my language -- for the life of me." Alex told her as they made themselves warm by the fireplace.
"I bet he told you that." Hermione commented. "What? That he did it for my sake? No. But I'm not daft." Alex responded. "Gosh, I'm adapting to your English quite well, aren't I? No. I think he's really just thoughtful."
Hermione would never admit it but after talking with Alex, she found herself wide awake at 3am. While she was genuinely happy Alex seems to have gotten herself accustomed to anything Hogwarts, she also can't deny at least to herself, that she was feeling ill at ease knowing the witch is getting close to her Slytherin.
Right, her Slytherin. The one she broke up with. And the one who didn't fight to keep her. Yet these past few days as she kept coming across him, flashbacks seem to echo her every step. She couldn't help but feel blue especially when she knows someone else gets the treatment she used to receive and she's already lost him.
The irony of it all. The very reason she broke up with him was because she felt like he was changing her without her persmission. Meeting and befriending Alex Russo opened her eyes to a few things however. The conclusion being, that she might have misunderstood him in more ways than one.
If despair had a color, it would be dark gray. As stormy as the color of his eyes when they disagree on something. As cloudy on days when he can't be bothered. And it's as melancholic as any given time when she misses him.
The succeeding days saw Hermione Granger keeping to herself. It was uncalled for but pain has crept her heart every waking day she's discovering Draco Malfoy from Alex Russo's perspective. She still comes to class but she's left her consciousness someplace else.
"I'm glad to see you looking chipper again mate." That was Theo Nott. Hermione Granger found herself leaning towards the bookshelves to eavesdrop. An action that is recklessly Gryffindor, but also as sneaky as a Slytherin.
"I am never chipper." This time, it was Draco Malfoy who spoke. "Whatever helps you sleep at night Draco." Theo said. "I am just saying I'm glad you're no longer hurting. Granger did a number on you."
"I think I've hurt her more than she's let on. She wouldn't have felt the need to break up if I was more eloquent with my feelings. She must have thought I was too controlling. Telling her to do things she apparently didn't want to do."
"You mean telling her to be herself? What is so wrong about asking her to wear slippers?" Theo Nott asked. The sarcasm was not amiss for Hermione however. "I don't know. She must have loved wearing those high heeled shoes and I shouldn't have assumed she didn't. This discussion makes things sound petty, we should stop."
"Well for the brightest witch of her age, she should have known you meant well." Theo pressed. Hermione almost made herself known at the jab on her intellect. "I admit, at the beginning that was all there is to it. I genuinely wanted to make her feel comfortable. But eventually I guess it was me being really controlling. I didn't like the way our male schoolmates looked at her. I can't jinx them all to stop could I? Yet I shouldn't have imposed on her."
Hermione had to look at her feet. No one told her to wear flats yet she's wearing them. She was comfortable with it. The only reason why she wanted to wear the heels was because he complimented her the night they went to meet his parents for the first time. She thought he liked it.
"I bet you also didn't tell her you always meet her late because Blaise needed tutoring and Pansy kept disturbing your lessons. My word, whatever happened to your eloquency?" Theo sounded exasperated when he asked.
"I might have turned docile when we were together. I haven't experienced liking someone so much until I met her." Draco chuckled. "But to confirm your theory, I didn't see the need to. She didn't say anything about me being late. So I thought she understood. It surprised me she has been keeping it to herself the whole time. I should have been more thoughtful. But that's in the past. Why are we talking about this now? You should move on mate. I have."
Needless to say, Hermione found herself alone again, even as students went to Hogsmeade. She gave both Harry and Ron the excuse of needing to study more because she's behind her normal performance. She however stayed only to mull over things at the astronomy tower.
She somehow took the steps to the highest tower of the castle when everyone has gone. She had no idea what has gotten to her but she decided to open her playlist. The one replaced by his music. Maybe it was because she heard it from him that he's moved on and she too, should do as what she has successfully done before. Let go. She decided to start with clearing her playlist.
As she read through the titles of the songs, she noticed there were a few that she knows she didn't add herself. Her curiosity trumped any other feeling she might have had at the moment. Most of them are old songs. Only this first one is a bit new.
🎶 Seven billion people in the world, finding you is like a miracle, only this wonder remains, could I love you any more?🎶
To her surprise, she was able to hum to it without missing a beat. And it dawned on her that she used to listen to it with him. Yet, it was like it's the first time she's listening to it. Only now did she really allowed herself to understand it. How could she? The song is lovely!
🎶 I didn't mean to hurt you, I'm sorry that I made you cry, I didn't want to hurt you. I'm just a jealous guy.🎶
Eyebrows meeting, Hermione looked at the title of the second song again. She also has heard this song quite a lot. It was one of those songs he liked to play when they don't see eye to eye. And mostly, they only ever disagree when it was about her outfit.
But of course! She wouldn't let him the time of the day, would she? She always winds up wearing what he wants her to wear but she also always had the last word in the argument and almost never let him speak. And he would just take it while all along she thought she was the only one compromising. He was talking to her through the songs!
🎶You laughed at me, you said you never needed me...you know we let each other down, but then most of all, I do love you.🎶
Hermione almost cried as she laughed. It was funny in a way. She did tell him that when he opened doors for her. Said she didn't need him doing stuff she can do. Maybe it was because they were just friends then. And she was a walking advocacy. Women can handle things on their own.
The last of the songs she didn't put in her playlist herself is a song she knows. She can't help but finally tear up. He was even sneaking muggle songs in her playlist.
🎶 What would you do if my heart was torn in two? More than words to show you feel that your love for me is real. 🎶
It wasn't really something he was asking from her. This song was telling her this is how he moves. That he didn't need to say it. He only had to act on it. And looking back, he did! She was just so consumed by the things she did for him.
Realizing what she just realized, Hermione hugged her knees and buried her face in her folded arms. Travelling back in time with those songs, seeing him through Alex's eyes, and discovering him through Theo's words, made her heart hurt. It's like someone stabbed her and left her to die.
It hurt because it was the truth. And the truth is, moving on from Draco Malfoy was impossible. Especially when she's now seeing it all in her head. His love was burning red.