Work Text:
She ain't got my smile, that don't bother me a bit
She's got somebody else's eyes I'm seein' myself in
He had to admit that the first time he met Beatrice or really, Trixie, he didn't really know what to do. He wasn't used to small humans, children, /urchins/, being not only unafraid of him, but overly eager in his presence. She was like a leech, in the beginning, constantly hugging him with his big smile and eyes that she clearly got from her mother.
I'm holdin' onto every moment, God knows I've missed a few
The day we met I knew I had some catchin' up to do
However, as she got older (and somehow wiser), Lucifer came to admire her, the deceptive little parasite as he'd once coined her once upon a time, as he had done so with many lately, craving moments like the one they'd had the first day they'd met by accident when she was 7 and still…annoying more than clever.
She ain't my blood, ain't got my name
But if she did, I'd feel the same
She didn't have his last name (except that one time) or the tile of borne from the Morningstar, nor did she resemble or have the power of Nephilim in the colloquial sense, but she came to resemble something new and quite complicated to him as the years followed and his relationship with her mother had its phases, of which there were plenty of those that she'd stuck her little creature-like nose into, that was certain.
I wasn't there for her first steps
But I ain't missed a ball game yet
He wasn't there from when she started to walk or breathe on the Earth (her monkey phase apparently named by both her parents), given that had been formally Dan's place and still remained long after he had passed on, but he had never missed a cringeworthy, overzealous response from her despite his reservations.
And that ain't ever gonna change
I could never walk away
There had been many times she'd thought about leaving, selling LUX and upping stakes to get away from Chloe, Trixie, his brothers, Ella - all of them, given they were changing him (and had changed him) in ways he hated.
They always somehow managed to pull him back from this however which, over time, he didn't hate as much as he really wanted to or more than that, should have. He'd always felt like he'd never deserved love, much less anything less being condemned to damnation.
Yeah, she's my baby, my whole world
She ain't my blood, but she's my, she's my girl
That was also, scarily enough, changing when in the face of Trixie and the environment around him, which made the usually ever-steady devil fearful of even the smallest shred of defiance as he knew all too well that everything could collapse around him like a pack of cards as it had done many times before.
He didn't know when both Trixie and her mother, originally just his Pet Detective (where had that time gone?), started feeling like they relating to him could be so much more, but once they had, he knew it would take the divine to return it back to what it was before.
It hit me like a train, the first time she called me dad
In a three stick figure crayon picture with all of us holdin' hands
Lucifer knew that there would eventually be a nexus point where things irrevocably would collide and either cause panic and chaos or worse, change on the scale of something he had no name for as of yet.
Both seemed to be in store and also, within his many emotions, as he'd come to visit the Detective one afternoon, only to find in a mess of crayons and paper scattered upon her kitchen table, Trixie's identifiable writing and artistic sensibilities were on full display as several stick figures holding hands lined a hill under a roughly drawn sun, a dark one amongst them which that resembled himself.
Upon further examination, as he heard the backdoor open, Lucifer felt his cold heart quiver slightly as he saw that the 11-year-old had written "Dad" under himself before it had been crossed out and "Luci" had been put underneath instead hastily.
Her mama said, "I understand if it's too soon for this"
No, I didn't let her finish, I took it to the kitchen and I stuck it on the fridge, yeah
"Lucifer, hi." His head snapped up quite fast as Chloe suddenly entered the room, looking windswept as per normal, but still oh so beautiful. "I didn't hear you come in."
"Well, I thought I might come and visit you and the…small human you created to see how the leads me and Maze manage to scrounge up stood up at the police department." He couldn't help but let his eyes stray to the image several times, heart somehow filling up despite his usually unflustered demeanour. "It seems she's gained quite an affinity for scribbling nonsensical lines rather than being Mars's first President."
"Oh, yeah, she made that school today." Chloe sheepishly uttered, obviously having noticed the same thing he had earlier. "I know it's a little too soon for any of that kind of stuff given we've only just started this…part of everything and figuring things out, but she admires you so much and I already told her-"
"-what an incredible artist the miniature hooligan is? How her abilities surpass that of a thousand-year-old painter? Very good Detective." Lucifer plucked the drawing from its resting place, only to move with it and tuck it into his suit jacket. "The penthouse needed some new art, given I just replaced LUX's collection. This will look well when it's mounted and framed, given paper is so flimsy, but that's no trouble. They should be a decent wall to put it upon."
She ain't my blood, ain't got my name
But if she did, I'd feel the same
If Chloe's astonished face wasn't enough to spur him on, the child's look of surprise when he followed through with the action and hung the crude piece in its own frame against one of the walls of the kitchen plus the hug and few tears that escaped her was most definitely.
I wasn't there for her first steps
But I ain't missed a ball game yet
His father would be laughing at him from up above, he was sure, but found he didn't care. He could finally see almost how Amenadiel felt when addressing or interacting with Charlie or what Dan seemingly brought out in the wretched child that had caught his heart so quickly.
And that ain't ever gonna change
I could never walk away
He also knew that others, individuals demonic and angelic, would want to make sure he would lose this and it almost made his wings ruffle in anger.
When Lucifer got something he liked and now, he loved he wouldn't be letting it go anytime soon and this was one of those times.
Yeah, she's my baby, my whole world
She ain't my blood, but she's my, she's my girl
The feeling that the Detective and Trixie gave him…he wanted that feeling for the rest of his life and made it his mission, other than to do what he was already doing to keep it. All of it.
She's Saturday morning cartoons
She's, "Hey, can I sleep in your room?"
He now wanted all of the stupid human things that he'd never appreciated, given humans used to be nothing but souls to him and others like his brother. The early mornings where Trixie would pull him and her mother from their bed to watch space documentaries on the television, the late nights where the child, despite being a tween, hid between himself and Chloe's bodies as storms raged over the southern California sky…all of it.
She's bigger than the plans I had
She's makin' me a better man
He'd never admit this to anyone, but he was sure both Chloe and Trixie at large were the reasons why his wings had returned to his horror. They, as Amenadiel had asked so long ago, saved his soul and gave him a miracle to believe in, to his private chagrin.
She ain't my blood, ain't got my name
But if she did, I'd feel the same
It was long, /long/ after he'd left the vessel of Earth on his own choice and returned to Hell that he'd heard whispers from above that filtered somehow down to the depths of some woman named Beatrice Espinoza-Morningstar had now become the youngest qualified astronaut in US history at 18 years of age and that her younger sister, a sweet little 6 year old named Aurora, wanted to follow into her footsteps (but wouldn't exactly, as it turned out to be).
I wasn't there for her first steps
But I ain't missed a ball game yet
It made his now beating and finally bloomed heart ache with sadness as well as pride, knowing that Trixie was following her dreams (and creating an early ulcer for everyone around her) even without him there to watch.
And that ain't ever gonna change
I could never walk away
That was okay to him, however, as he had confidence that she and his other daughter were being raised by his former and never succeeded lover as well as everyone else whom he'd left behind with the love he'd left with them.
Yeah, she's my baby, my whole world
She ain't my blood, but she's my, she's my girl
That thought alone made him smile wickedly and sit up in his chair within his newly created office, his current client becoming curious. "Sir? Is everything okay? You look like you're somewhere else."
Yeah, she's my, she's my girl
"Yes, just thinking about some other business matters." His smooth voice easily slipped back into character, soothing and surly, not even portraying the shake and emotion it would have had 5 minutes ago. "Let's get back to business, shall we?"