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He didn't really want to come along to this event, but when did Lan Wangji ever deny his family anything or would put his own needs before others? It was expected of him to come along, it wasn't really a question when his uncle asked. Merely a courtesy to articulate it as such, but Lan Wangji had learnt not to say no to any request as vaguely as they may be formulated.
Of course there was a difference between obedience because you're the second heir to a family from a dynasty hundreds of years old and imprisonment where you were just expected to follow your warden's order.
Lan Wangji found himself not being able to discern between these two anymore.
But then again, there was nothing really he seeked out to do on his own, for his own. Following directions was what he learnt, not forming his own thoughts and opinions.
Now, sitting at the round table with his uncle and older brother and some other distant relatives that upheld some form of authority in their company, Lan Wangji stared into the middle distance, not even pretending to listen in. He was not expected to that, fortunately. If it were expected of him, this would probably be a pushing point for him to finally question his value in this family or as a person in general.
Music started playing, a soft violin, though loud enough to force people to stop talking, catching their attention.
A man, around his own age, walked up to the makeshift stage, barely elevated for people to be able to see without craning their necks. He was shirtless, billowing skirts in black and red and tights. And a saber almost as long as he was tall. His hair was put into a high ponytail, endlessly long and rumbuckus but firm in its hold.
And his eyes, oh, his eyes.
For once, Lan Wangji was grateful for the influence and social standing of his family, giving them a table right in the middle, closest to the stage. He could see the gleam in his grey eyes, the mischievous glint that played at the edge of his mouth, tucking it up into a small smile.
Without a greeting or any form of introduction, he stood in the center of the stage, feet elegantly placed slightly in front of each other and the saber pointed upwards, he demanded every single eye upon him.
The violin picked up and he started to dance. And dance he could. His body was a wave, flowing with every current the music pushed him to. The saber, an extension of his body, danced around him. He rarely had a hand on it, but his whole body owned it. The hilt rolled over his arms, was picked up by his shoulders to be thrown over his head as he jumped and twisted mid air.
Lan Wangji could feel everybody in the room share a sharp inhale, not daring to blink in fear to miss something, as the saber soared around the man's neck to land on his other shoulder where it belonged. A playful smile split the dancer's face, aware of the effect he had on his audience.
His hair caressed the sword like an old friend, not afraid in the slightest if it would be cut because it never has and the man exuded such a confidence that it never will. His skirts billowed on every twirl, on every stretch of his legs, on every jump akin to that of a ballerina.
The music ascended and with a sudden jolt it abruptly stopped, leaving the man in a high strung position on his tiptoes, saber in a rare grip of his hand pointed forward directly at Lan Wangji.
He could feel the man's eyes on him. He could feel him staring. He could feel being seen. And it felt like he could breathe for the first time in his life.
The music started again, the saber thrusted forward, the dancer's other hand guiding three fingers along the blade like an unspoken promise.
His steps grew more furious, still elegant but desperate. Lan Wangji could feel it in the music, in the tension of the man's muscles.There was frustration, longing, searching. And with every new turn, their eyes met and for a split second it felt like he found it. But the music just wouldn't stop, wouldn't let them have a moment to breathe the same air, to listen to their heartbeat to find out what they were looking for.
The music slowed. A breath, a second breath, the saber hovering over his outstretched arms as he twirled and twirled and twirled and his eyes never left Lan Wangji's and they finally breathed in tandem.
His feet found their rhythm, found solid ground, every step deliberate as if he found what he was looking for and walked towards it.
His other half, Lan Wangji's heart whispered into the silence between notes.
The music stopped, the saber clenched between two hands and he bowed, barely out of breath. Lan Wangji felt like he ran a marathon for the both of them.
It took them all a stunned silence to realize it was over, a joyous standing ovation followed and only then allowed the dancer himself to stand upright again. Eyes roaming over the crowd, throwing smiles out as if it were nothing and all Lan Wangji could think was, look at me.
He didn't stand, hands pulled into fists that wrinkled his pants, because he didn't trust his knees to hold him upright. But his patience paid off. After the dancer gave everyone their fair share of attention, his eyes landed back on Lan Wangji. And maybe it was just wishful thinking, a mere fantasy he strung along only by himself, but Lan Wangji could swear the dancer's gaze softened, his smile edging into something genuine and not staged.
But the moment was over before he could really savour it. The dancer was ushered off stage, a new act taking his place. Lan Wangji didn't pay attention to anything that wasn't him.
"Excuse me," he informed his brother in a breathless whisper as he finally dared to stand up. Lan Xichen glanced over to him with a questioning smile but only nodded when Lan Wangji vaguely pointed in the direction of the restrooms.
His legs felt so unbearably heavy and jittery, it was a miracle they didn't buckle under him as he bolted into a very dignified Lan-esque kind of way towards the exit. But he couldn't wait a second longer, not bearing to be apart from him. He needed to know. His name, his soul, if he felt the same as Lan Wangji.
Time was just blur, Lan Wangji walked the hallways around the ballroom they were all seated in, trying to find his way around, but eventually he made it. There was a row of doors adorned with names, timetables for when their act was up pinned next to it. Lan Wangji walked down the hallway slowly, carefully reading each name and highlighted time slot, their scheduled act.
Until.
Wei Wuxian, 6.30 pm, saber dance.
Wei Wuxian. Lan Wangji licked his lips, dry from breathing too harshly with a slightly open mouth. He lifted his trembling hand to knock and…
… and hesitated. What would he say? What did he expect of the dancer to do? What was he thinking? What wou-
The door was yanked open and Lan Wangji was face to face with the dancer still in his stage outfit, bare chested and flowly skirts. He almost collided with Lan Wangji on his way out, but stopped his step midair and caught himself.
His lips formed in a circle. "Oh," a hushed whisper between them. "Oh," he huffed a little louder. And then he grabbed Lan Wangji by the wrist, pulling him inside the room in a fluent motion with closing the door behind him again. His hands flew up to, oh, so tenderly cup his jaw, looking up to him reverently.
"Let me look at you," Wei Wuxian whispered. His thumbs hovered over his cheekbones, barely a touch but it seared Lan Wangji nonetheless. And his eyes, crescent moons for his smile that was too big for his face, roamed over his face, taking him in, swallowing him whole. And Lan Wangji let himself fall. He stared back and back and back, not daring to move, to breathe only when Wei Wuxian did.
Time was a blur, Lan Wangji noticed once again, for it could have been seconds or hours that they were staring at each other and he found himself not caring either way. It only mattered that it felt real, that Lan Wangji wasn't imagining things during the performance. There was something, something had happened and both tried to figure out what it had been.
"I finally found you," Wei Wuxian voice trembled, his hands threatened to slip from his face and Lan Wangji couldn't let that happen, so he grabbed his wrists, holding them in place. "Lan Zhan."
Lan Wangji blinked, his brain catching up to what Wei Wuxian said. He blinked once, twice.
"Wha-" and something crashed inside of him, like a bucket of ice cold water being doused over him as pictures and feelings and memories came rushing in.
"Oh," he breathed out. "Oh."
"You found me," his lips barely moved but it was the closest his mouth came to a smile in a long, long while. "Wei Ying."