Work Text:
"Oh my god. Can you believe this?" Leslie stares up at the tiny television in horror, her eyes squinting from the glare the fluorescent bulbs cast on the Parks office at night, her mouth agape in shock. "Ben, why are you not watching this?"
Ben peers up from the ticket sales spreadsheet he's tabulating to glance at Leslie in confusion. "What's the big deal? It's just another political sex scandal. They're pretty much commonplace nowadays. Hell, I think it's almost a requirement if you want to get anywhere in politics today." Her scandalized gasp is instantaneous, and Ben grins. "I'm kidding, Leslie."
She keeps her suspicious glare trained on him for a moment longer before reluctantly turning to face the glowing TV once more. "I know... I know that."
Ben continues to smile as he goes back to work on his numbers. After a couple more minutes, the strain of the fluorescent lights is too much, and he rubs his eyes wearily. "So what's the deal with this Dexheart? He's a huge sleazebag, right?"
"The hugest. The most gigantic, sleaziest sleazebag in all of sleaze history."
"Really?" Ben counters, doubt lacing his voice. "Sleazier than running off with some mistress while your wife's at home with cancer? Or keeping a diary of all the female staffers you've groped throughout your career?"
Leslie frowns and considers this. "Well, okay, you have a point. Maybe not the sleaziest. But he's in the Top Ten of the Sleaze Hall of Fame. Dexheart is just a whole other ball of gross. I don't really want to talk about it too much, but the last time this happened, it might have involved a cave, a woman, a man, another woman... there may have been more involved, I'm not sure. I tried to block it out." Her face scrunches up as she thinks. "And then there was something about a closet full of nurses... and I think some transplant patient's wife. I don't know."
"Huh." Ben is almost impressed. Pawnee really did exceed his expectations in every way. "So what did he do this time?"
Leslie's eyes grow comically wide. "I'm not sure, but I heard it had something to do with..." Her voice drops to a scandalized whisper. "... a goat."
Nope, he wasn't expecting that one. "Woooow..."
"I know, right?" An excited grin breaks out over her face. She looks almost giddy, like she's just shared a really juicy piece of gossip. Which she did, really... "I just hope he's finally going to get what he deserves. That man is a total scumbag. Trust me, I know from personal experience." She shudders.
Ben's eyebrows leap up, his mouth dropping open. Leslie stares at him for a second, confused by his reaction, before it clicks and she scowls in disgust. "Ewww! Ben! No! Ugh!"
His face slowly settles into composure, but a hint of shock remains.
Her glare continues, and she shakes her head in disapproval. "Really, Ben?"
"What? No! No. No, of course not... I didn't think... I'd never think... um, I mean... Obviously you'd never do anythi... uhhh... I know that morals and ethics are important... to... you..." He's so worked up that it takes Ben a few seconds to recognize the smirk gracing Leslie's beautiful mouth. "You are truly evil."
Her grin grows even wider. "Only when I see an opportunity to make you all cute and flustered like that."
A small smile slips out before he quickly drops his eyes back down to the table, eager to look at anything but her goddamn adorable victorious smirk.
Leslie clicks the television off and sighs loudly.
Ben watches her with concern as she slumps down heavily into the little plastic chair. "You tired? It's already..." He glances at his watch. "... Whoa. Way too late for us to be here, Leslie. Did you know it's already quarter to one?" He lifts his head up and warily surveys the office. "Does this place have any security?"
Leslie releases another deep sigh, eyes gazing sightlessly in front of her. "Yeah, Murray's here every other night, but he usually just falls asleep in the women's restroom by 10 o'clock." She notices Ben's confusion and elaborates, "Well, there is a really nice couch in there... plus, Murray's 68... Anyways, I've taken care of myself just fine for years. I took a self-defense class, so I know how to use an attacker's strength against him or herself. I always keep a can of mace in both my desk and my purse. And if things ever get really dicey, I know where Ron keeps his axe."
Ben knows he's staring, knows she can clearly read from the look on his face that he is openly worshipping her, and he doesn't even care. "You will never cease to amaze me, Leslie Knope."
She holds his gaze, and he swears he can see the same adoration shining in her eyes, too. "You're not so bad yourself."
Finally, she breaks and heaves another sigh before staring off into space again. Ben slides his chair up next to hers and places a gentle hand on her shoulder, rubbing lightly. "Come on, let's get you home. You need some sleep."
"You need some sleep." She shakes her head slightly. "Sorry. I didn't mean that. It's just that... that's not it. Really, I'm not tired at all."
He cocks his head to the side and raises an eyebrow in disbelief.
"No, I mean it, Ben. I have tons of energy. Here, look." Leslie drops to the side of her chair to rifle through her purse a few moments before popping back up triumphantly.
"See? Lots of energy." She opens her fist and lets the pile of Pixi Stix fall onto the table before picking a few back up to tear open and pour in her mouth. She tilts her head back, sugar continuing to pile up on her tongue, as she asks him, "Wahn sahm?"
Ben shuts his eyes and chuckles. "Nah, I'm good tonight."
Leslie shrugs and empties a few more Pixi Stix into her mouth.
He leans forward and props his elbow on the table, resting his chin on his open palm, his eyes fixed on her. "So what is it, then?"
She swallows the last of the sugar and wipes her mouth, brushing a few stray crystals onto Ben's arm. "Huh?"
"Well, if you're not tired, something's bothering you. You don't get all quiet and mopey for no reason."
"I'm not mopey." She stands up abruptly and crosses the room to toss the wrappers into the trash, using a bit more force than necessary to throw the little strips of paper into the can. "I'm just... I'm fed up, Ben." She whips back around to him, and her mouth is scrunched up into that tight little pucker she does when she's really pissed. Honestly, if he didn't know how upset she obviously was, Ben would definitely be turned on right now.
"Fed up of what, Leslie?"
"Dexheart. All the Dexhearts of the world. Do you know how many degrading scandals he's weasled his way out of here in Pawnee? No? Well me neither, because no one knows just how many he's successfully covered up. My god, the guy has a cave orgy, using public funds, and he's still in charge of the city! Who knows, he might even be able to slime his way out of this one..."
"Really? Even with the... goat?"
"Probably!"
She falls back into the chair beside him, gnawing on her bottom lip, and he wants to hug her or pat her back or something because she looks like she's about to explode, and one AM in the Parks office is not the best time and place to rage about the inequities of life.
Instead, he just picks her hand up from the table and gives it a squeeze. "Screw him, Leslie... And I don't mean that literally." He flashes her a half-grin, and she bites back a laugh. "Seriously though, Dexheart and all the other slimeball bureaucrats in the world will never hold a candle to you. Despite every obstacle you've faced, despite almost losing your job and your department, you're still the same idealistic, optimistic, strong, amazing woman you were the day I met you. Those kind of men might be in power now, but as soon as the world realizes that someone like you really exists, someone who actually believes that having hope can fix everything, someone who thinks that honor and integrity aren't just campaign slogans but are integral to being a politician, someone who will never give up on a dream... There'll be no stopping you, Leslie."
She stares at him in wonder, and he wants her to keep looking at him like that forever. She brushes a tear from the corner of her eye. "Damn, Ben... You're going to make a hell of a Vice-President one day."
He smiles. "Knope/Wyatt, 2020."
She laughs. "Hell yeah."
"You ready to go?"
"Yeah, I just have to get my coat from my office." Leslie picks her bag off the floor and sets it on the table before turning to study him carefully. He begins to fidget just as she speaks. "Why can't more politicians be more like you, Ben Wyatt? Heck, why can't more men be like you? You're just so nice and dependable."
His smile is still in place, but his brow begins to furrow.
"I bet you've never done a single bad thing in your life... I mean, besides bankrupting your hometown and firing a bunch of people. But that was for work, so it doesn't count."
Ben's confused. "Thanks... I think."
"No, that came out wrong. I mean it in a good way. You'd never be the kind of guy who'd get caught in a cave orgy scandal. You'd probably never even consider having sex in a cave." She pats his hand and rises. "Let me just get my coat."
For some reason, this gets to him. He knows she thinks it's a compliment, that she thinks being nice and dependable are two of the best traits anyone can possess. But all he's hearing right now is that he's safe, predictable, boring. And it upsets him.
Ben clenches his hand into a fist before calling out to her, "Leslie, wait." She turns back around. "You really think I've never done anything bad? Ever?"
She smiles at him knowingly. "Come on, Ben. You're just like me. You've known since you were little that you wanted to end up in the White House, so you never did anything that would get you in trouble. The worst thing you've ever done was get too drunk that one night and accidentally touch Donna's boob."
He sits for a minute, digesting her words, before jumping out of his chair and following her into her office. "You're wrong, you know."
Leslie turns around and starts, surprised to see him standing so close behind her.
"I can be bad, sometimes, too."
Leslie watches him, confusion written on her face, as he steps closer and closer until she has to back up and bumps into the corner of her desk. Her heart is beating out of her chest, and all she can do is laugh nervously. "What are you doing, Ben?"
He smiles, a slow, sexy smile that Leslie's never seen grace his lips before. Her stomach is doing cartwheels.
"I'm proving a point." Ben leans in closer, and now she can feel the warmth of his breath on her lips. He brushes a stray hair out of her eyes and moves in even closer, agonizingly slow, teasing her. "If I want, I can be very bad..."
Her eyes just manage to flit closed before his lips capture hers. It's searing, blinding, primal. It burns her from the inside out, and she thinks it's insane to feel this way from just a kiss. A fucking amazing kiss. Her arms instinctively wrap themselves around his neck before Ben lifts her up and onto her desk. He continues his assault on her mouth, rough and passionate in a way Leslie could've never even imagined. She has one hand gripped in his hair and the other clasped on his dorky plaid shirt, pulling him as close as physically possible, and oh god this feels good...
Leslie backs further onto the desk, opens her legs to allow him to get even closer, and bumps into the computer monitor and... what is she doing?
"Ben?" She pulls back as he kisses a wet trail down the side of her neck. "Ben!"
"Hmmm?" he mumbles into the crook of her throat, and the vibrations make Leslie want to melt into a pile of goo. Get it together, girl! She gives him a hard shove and he steps back, first looking dazed at the loss of contact, then sullen, like he'd just lost his favorite puppy. "What's wrong?"
"What's wrong? We can't do this on my desk, Ben!"
He smirks, and she wants to slap him, then kiss him. Maybe not in that order. "Why? Afraid to do something wrong? Afraid you might get caught in your very own scandal?"
Leslie huffs and rolls her eyes. "No, doofus. I just have all my paperwork for tomorrow organized on my desk and I don't want it to get messed up." She glances over Ben's shoulder to search the office. "Let's go to Jerry's desk. There's nothing important there."
Ben laughs and presses a quick kiss to the corner of her lips. "Yes, ma'am." His smile is huge as Leslie jumps into his arms, wrapping her legs around his waist as he carries them through the door. They fumble around a bit, too focused on each other's mouths to pay any attention to where they're going. After knocking two file folders off April's desk and upending Leslie's purse, spilling out all its contents, Ben starts to think that maybe they're not so good at this. But then she pulls him back to her lips, and Ben stops thinking.
They reach their destination. He sets her on the desk carefully before pulling away slowly, letting his fingers glide from her hips down her thighs, finally coming to rest on her knees. He brings a hand up to cup her face, his thumbs lightly brushing the flush on her cheek, and leans back in to-
"The lights. Get the lights!"
"Are you serious? There's no one here, Leslie."
"The lights, Ben."
He groans and pulls away from her, then rushes to the front of the office to flick the switch. The room is plunged into darkness, the light from the hallway only coming far enough into the doorway to reach the permits desk. He rushes back to find her, but only makes it a few steps before slipping on the pile of Pixi Stix littering the floor and knocking over the plastic chair.
"Oh god, Ben, are you okay? I can't see you. What happened?"
"Nothing. I'm fine. It's nothing." He grimaces and rubs his shin. "Stupid chair," he mutters. He makes his way back to her more carefully now, his arms wide in front of him to feel his way, but only makes it a couple more steps before his hand collides with something on Jerry's desk that falls to the floor and shatters. "Shit. What was that?"
Leslie pulls him back in between her legs. "It was probably just the mug Jerry got for his 25th anniversary here." She kisses the underside of his throat. "I'll get him another one."
"Ah...mmm, okay..." Ben should probably feel bad about that, but...
His hands circle her waist again and he pulls her close, nuzzling her neck in that way that makes Leslie want to laugh and cry at the same time. She pulls frantically at the bottom of his tucked-in shirt to free it, and sighs when her hands finally make contact with the warm skin of his back.
Ben nibbles on her ear and whispers, "One time, in middle school, I skipped an entire half day to watch a re-broadcast of a Bush/Dukakis debate."
Leslie laughs in surprise. "What?"
"The original debate was on too late at night, so when I found out it was going to air again the next day, I cut class and went to the town diner to watch it." He flashes her a smug grin. "I didn't turn in any of my assignments or anything."
She smiles wide into his kiss. "You rebel."
"I know, right?" He helps her shrug out of her jacket before turning his attention to the top buttons of her blouse. "And in high school, I stole three shopping carts from the local grocery store."
She chuckles and starts working at the knot of his tie. "So Benji Wyatt was a bad boy, huh?"
"Oh, yeah." He smirks, running a hand through her curls while the other plays with the bottom of her silk camisole. "I was basically Partridge's version of James Dean."
"Okay, okay. I'm convinced. Now stop talking and get over here."
He smiles for a second before her hands are fisted up in his shirt and she's pulling him back to her.
Ben lowers her onto the desk gently, taking care not to destroy any more of Jerry's valuables, before climbing on top and -
"Hello? Somebody in here?"
Ben jumps up in shock, slipping off the side of the desk and crashing to the floor. "Shit..."
"Ben! You okay?"
"Ms. Knope? That you?"
"Yeah, Murray, it's me." She sits up quickly and scrambles to button her blouse back up. "What are you still doing here?"
"Oh, I just woke up." Leslie leans down to offer Ben a hand up. He grimaces and rubs where his hip made contact with the floor. "How about you? Everything okay in here?"
She smooths out the front of her shirt while Ben tries to look anywhere in the room except at the old security guard standing in the door way. "Yeah, fine. Everything's fine. We're just... on our way out... right now."
Murray smiles before shuffling out into the hall. "Alright then. G'night Ms. Knope, Mr. Knope."
"Good night, Murray. Be careful getting home."
Leslie smiles bashfully at Ben before pulling her jacket back on and leaning down to place the spilled Pixi Stix back in her purse.
"Do you think you can get everybody to stop calling me that?" Ben runs a hand through his mussed up hair. "I thinks it's enough that Tom constantly refers to me as your 'boy toy'."
"Come on. It's cute." Leslie giggles. "Besides, it was your idea that we keep our names."
"Yes. Exactly. Keep our names."
"Oh, stop being a baby. You'll be Mr. Benjamin Wyatt on the ballots, I promise." She threads her fingers into his and grins up at him. "Besides, I think it's pretty sexy when they call you Mr. Knope."
Ben sighs deeply. "Fine. But I get to call you Mrs. Wyatt at home."
Leslie smiles and leans her head on his shoulder as they walk out the door. "Deal."
They make it halfway up the hallway before she turns to look at him. "Ben, when we get in the White House, do you think we can have our own sex scandal?"
He smiles and kisses the top of her head. "Sure."