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A garden park had opened up somewhere. Mafuyu didn’t know why, but he wanted to go so badly .
They heard it was a beautiful garden park, filled with roses, tulips, dahlias, peonies, morning glories, carnations, and forget-me-nots of multiple colors. You could simply imagine how scented the park would be, but, that wasn’t the bothering matter as of this moment, more importantly, he should focus on the desperation they were feeling.
It was odd, he never felt such desperation. Perhaps this was how Ena felt when she was showing off her art, desperation to have attention for who she is? How bothersome.
Nevertheless, as peculiar as the feeling of craving was, the even more unusual fact was the fact that they wanted to invite a certain composer from his underground music circle.
Why her specifically? As if they would know, this desirous feeling for Kanade was already confusing enough, he’d rather not dwell on another bothering desire.
Was it the carnations? They knew it was Kanade’s favorite flower and considering how much she went outside, Mafuyu might have unconsciously thought that it was a good idea to take them outside? He quickly rejects that thought, especially since Mafuyu wouldn’t have unconsciously thought about Kanade and her favorite flowers, especially since Ena’s favorites were peonies and roses.
Normally, they wouldn’t have spent this much time thinking, especially with such useless matters like desires. Mafuyu’s head was typically empty, the only time they had to think was when they were with Nightcord or doing schoolwork, which always required very minimal effort and time.
Nightcord was always a good distraction, hearing Ena and Mizuki argue in one of the channels about whatever Mizuki thought would be amusing to get on Ena’s nerves about (and frankly, sometimes his too.). Or even talking to Kanade about their music, it was all very distracting.
Just how the 月 looks right now.
Oh.
The 月.
Honestly, they should’ve seen this coming.
Especially with the way, he would sometimes feel warm around them,
Or, the way she would say that would save them,
Or, maybe even, the fact he would get upset when either Ena or Mizuki started getting rather ‘friendly’ with them.
How bothersome.
The problem wasn’t that he wanted to just—hold her close, kiss them, or whatever people did with their partners. The issue was that he couldn’t hold on to these hopeless feelings; for multiple reasons.
Number one being, their parents; they obviously wouldn’t let Mafuyu into a relationship much less a homosexual one, while they could hide it, but his mother would find out anyway, she finds out everything.
The second reason is less important but still relevant. It’s the fact that Kanade might not even see them in such a way, her feelings could be platonic; and possibly, if he was hopeful, they might see him as a queer-platonic partner for all they know.
In any case, he should start getting ready to meet with the rest of Nightcord, they don’t want to be late.
Or, well, rather, later than he is.
To Mafuyu’s surprise, it was very well past 12 AM, which was when he had started thinking about the garden park, had it really been two full hours since they started thinking about everything.
01:19 AM shined brightly from his monitor, they were almost 20 minutes late.
Was he becoming Ena? For fuck's sake, this is the third time they’ve something like her today.
Ignoring that thought, Mafuyu quickly logged on to the Nightcord server.
And instantly got a mention, as well as another 274.
Amia; [@Yuki join call cmon!!!]
Enanan; [i dont understand why youre so stubborn hes clearly not online.]
Yuki; [I am though.]
Amia; [see enanan!!! they are!!!]
Amia; [yuki!! join me and k in the voice channel!! she was waiting for you!!]
Yuki; [Yes, I am. Apologies for the wait.]
Amia; [whats that @Enanan? cat got your tongue??]
Mafuyu quickly muted the channel to mentions only (because he was not in any mood to see Amia and Enanan argue), and joined K and Amia in a voice channel.
“Hey~a Yuki~” Amia said in a chirpy voice.
“Hi.” He dryly responded.
They could hear Amia replying to supposedly a bothered Enanan, by the obnoxious sound of the keyboard keys.
Where was K? She would typically say something, anything in fact, they would say how the song was coming along, or their simple “Hi Yuki.” or even how long her noodles have been cooking for.
“You’re probably wondering where K is, right?” Amia said through their typing.
“How did you—”
“You’re like in love with her, Yuki! When we’re at the sekai you’re always looking at them, even with others around! And if you aren’t looking at her, you’re always talking about something K-related.” They giggled, even if they had completely cut Mafuyu off.
“Anyways, I made them eat something other than noodles. So, she went to get something.”
“Ah.” was all that could come from Mafuyu’s mouth. He wanted to say more, was that really how he acted? Did Kanade know about it, and if they did, did she mind?
“Well! I better get going, my teacher called me, saying I have to stop playing hooky and I rather not through another hour-long phone scolding. See ya, Yuki!” Amia said in their annoyingly cheeky voice before leaving.
Mafuyu just sighed.
Akiyama "Amia" Mizuki was exhausting. Extremely exhausting.
If Mafuyu did act like that, surely someone would’ve said something, and it’s not possible that Amia of all people would have noticed, especially since they were so barely dense to the way Enanan looked at them.
“Amia, are you still there?” A soothing voice said, interrupting his thoughts.
“No, they left a few minutes ago.”
“Ah… Yuki… Hi, were you waiting long for me?” She said back, probably unknowing how to reply to Mafuyu’s answer.
“No, I wasn’t.”
“I’m glad then. Would you like to continue working on what we talked about yesterday?”
“Yes, I would.”
“Alright, I’ve DMed what I have so far, could you check it over?”
“Of course.”
“Mmh, it’s fine, I think you could tune down some noises, so it doesn’t sound as full.”
“I see, thank you. I get you’ll be working on the lyrics, correct?”
“Mhm.”
The eager feeling was back, well more like it rose again, it never went, just calmed down.
This would be the perfect time to ask Kanade wouldn’t it? The two of them are alone, after all, and Mafuyu could easily sneak out.
“… Kanade?”
She makes a noise, agreement.
“Do you have time?”
“Uh, yeah, I suppose? Why?”
“Make me in the new garden park.”
“Wait, this late?”
“Yes.”
“Shouldn’t we work instead? Mizuki and Ena would be upset.”
“They won’t.”
“I don’t have a choice, do I?” They laughed awkwardly.
“Exactly.”
“That’s what I thought… See you in a bit, Mafuyu.” You could practically hear the soft smile in their voice.
“I was starting to think you wouldn’t come.”
“Sneaking out was more difficult than I thought.”
“Are you sure you’re going to be okay being out here?”
“Yes, I doubt we’ll be out here for 4 hours.”
“That’s true… Actually, why did you call me out here?”
“I just needed to—”
The words ‘See you’ quickly died in his mouth.
“—be somewhere that wasn’t the house.”
“Ah… Okay…?” Kanade sounded unconvinced, but decided not to dwell on it.
“Well, let’s get going, shall we?”
She hummed in agreement, trailing behind Mafuyu.
“Oh, forget-me-nots…”
“Hm? You like forget-me-nots, Kanade?”
“I like their meanings… The flower isn’t exactly my liking.”
“What’s the meaning, then?”
“The pink ones represent true love, and respect. While the white ones represent sincerity, and charity. My favorites though are the blue ones, they mean memory loss, desperate love, and eternity.” They replied, crouching near the forget-me-nots.
“I see. You seem to know your flower language.”
“Oh, I suppose… It’s just a simple pastime, honestly.”
“Ah. I see.”
The conversation just ended there, it was obvious to Mafuyu that Kanade wanted to say something else but held it back for some reason. Mafuyu also wanted to say something else, but had no idea what that could be. So, he just opted for staring at Kanade under the 月光, and surprisingly, they started back.
“—Mafuyu.”
It had gone a few minutes without anyone saying anything, just them taking in the moment, with all the scenery, obnoxious scent, and horrid background noise; with all this Kanade was gorgeous, she was the only pleasant thing to think about.
Kanade was whispering, though, all he had heard was their own name.
“Excuse me? I didn’t understand what you said, Kanade.”
“I said that—” They had forced her voice to be louder.
“—let's become forget-me-nots…” but it had died out.
What an odd request?
Did she mean that they should become the meanings of forget-me-nots?
They should become true and desperate love? Or eternity and memory loss? Or even sincerity, respect or charity?
“What do you mean, Kanade?”
“Let’s become eternal.”
What do you mean by that, Yoisaki Kanade?
“Uh, Never mind, it was a stupid thought. Sorry.” She quickly said, cheeks quite red.
He needed to tell her, now.
“Kanade.”
“Yes…?”
“Give me your hand, we’re going somewhere.”
“Ah…! Okay?” They gave him their hand just to be dragged along.
“Where are we going if I can ask?”
“Under the 月光.”
“Oh, alright...?”
“Well, here we are?”
“Yes, here we are.”
“So, what did you want to—”
“月が綺麗ですね.” He cut her off, finally said it.
“Um… what? Can you repeat that?”
“月が綺麗ですね.”
“O-oh.”
“Hm.”
They were staring at each other again, but this time they were both under the moonlight.
Seconds passed, no response.
Seconds turned to minutes, still no response.
“Ah, well. I’ll get going now.”
“Wait—!”
Kanade grabbed their arm.
“Yes?”
“そうですね、あなたと永遠に眺めていたいです—”