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It felt… wrong. Sitting there with them, pretending like everything was okay. Even your smile, shaking in its forced and unnatural expression, felt wrong.
Taking advantage that Geralt, Yennefer and Ciri seemed so immersed in the conversation, you excused yourself and stood up. You felt Jaskier’s eyes follow you, but he continued playing his lute.
Glancing around you, it was hard to explain your strife. The forest was calm and peaceful, the sun shone bright above your heads, the birds chirped and the breeze was pleasant. Despite it all, a cold and brutal emptiness lingered inside your chest. You sighed, leaning your head on the bark of the tree you hadn’t realized you had weakly supported yourself against.
“I thought we were having a lovely time…” The bard’s voice startled you slightly, causing you to quickly turn around to him. You hadn’t noticed he had stopped playing. “Is something the matter, Y/N?”
“I…” You hesitated, not knowing if you wanted to tell him.
“Was it Geralt?” Jaskier grinned, taking a step and tilting his head as if to better read your expression. “He said something boorish, did he not?”
“No…” Your voice sounded hoarse, but you continued speaking. “Things aren’t well, Jaskier”
He frowned, rushing to delicately take your hands, and watched you with both sadness and empathy. It was baffling how quickly he dropped his playfulness.
“What happened?”
“I just… I have a lot on my mind”
“Anything you would like to share?”
“Not really…” You gulped, feeling the urge to cry as he intently watched you.
“That’s alright” Jaskier gently tugged at your hands to reassure you. “I’m sorry that you’re having a rough time, love”
“Yeah” You forced out a chuckle, rolling your eyes at your own demeanor. “But don’t worry, I will be alright”
“Hey” He gingerly put your hair behind your ear, sending shivers down your spine and making you stare at him. “It will be alright, yeah?
Jaskier had only repeated your own words, but they had a different effect coming from him. He actually believed them. Jaskier genuinely thought you would be alright, even if your broken heart told you otherwise. Nonetheless, it was comforting to hear it from someone else.
“Yeah” You replied after several seconds, now showing him an authentic smile despite the tears running down your cheeks. “Thank you”
“No problem, darling” Jaskier lovingly wiped your tears and you leaned into his touch. “Honestly, I’m glad I was the one to go after you, those three would have made you cry more”
His stupid joke had the desired effect - before you realized, you were laughing. It was only a small chuckle, but it was enough to remind you to breathe. Enough to promise you that the pain you currently felt wasn’t permanent. A spark of hope in the fleeting darkness that surrounded you.
“Give me a hug” Jaskier’s opened his arms. His bright and upbeat smile had returned. “I know you want one, come on”
You collided with him in that comforting embrace you had indeed been needing for days without being aware of it. When his arms fell around you, it was as though they mended the broken pieces of your heart. And when he kissed your head, you knew for certain that everything would be alright.