Archive of Our Own

Shahadah

“Masha’allah! ” 

The cheer echoed in their expansive living room and Raven’s face flushed with delightful color as she leaned forward and blew out the candles of her birthday cake. Starfire had ordered it special to ensure it was halal for her friend. Her teammates clapped excitedly and everyone settled back to watch the empath start opening her birthday gifts. Beast Boy danced around the couch and coffee table, phone recording the whole time as he kept a running commentary of everything going on much to his team’s dismay. The shapeshifter did quick cuts and zoomed in dramatically as Raven gingerly took the first gift off the pile and started picking at the wrapping paper.

Recently, in one of their now common Q&A sessions, Raven had admitted that while it did not say in the Qur’an or in valid hadith that Muslims did not acknowledge birthdays, she personally didn’t celebrate them and Beast Boy had been appalled. Immediately he had enlisted Starfire’s help in planning a small birthday celebration for their teammate. The green teen knew Raven would not appreciate a wild, public party that would call too much attention to her or involve too many people. However, a small exchange of gifts in their home didn’t seem too big a stretch and he was ecstatic to see she didn’t appear to be plotting his murder. There was actually a tiny smile tucked into the corner of her mouth and Garfield swore he could survive on the memory of that smile (and the video recording) for years to come.

“Oh, wow,” Raven breathed as she finally revealed her first gift. The box was a dusty purple velvet with gold detailing around the sides and corners and had a matching Qur’an nestled inside. There was also a heavy set of prayer beads with her name engraved on the end and the sorceress clutched them to her chest as she looked up at her team leader. Her eyes were wet. “Thank you, Robin.”

“I hope they serve you well,” the boy wonder replied, arms crossed over his chest like a dad watching his kids open a gift he told them they wouldn’t be getting. Beast Boy zoomed in on the empty whites of his mask and then spun the camera around again as Raven nodded, pressed her lips to the misbaha, and reached for the next gift.

Cyborg had gotten her a new prayer mat with delicate gold flowers stitched into the edges and an embroidered likeness of Ka’ba framed by gold, black, and white mihrab in the center. The team’s self-proclaimed tech expert beamed proudly at Raven as she admired the craftsmanship. He boasted, “I got that thing all the way from Turkey! Hell of a flight.”

“It’s gorgeous, Victor,” Raven said, pushing Beast Boy gently away from where he had come to put the camera directly in her face. She pressed a soft kiss to the mat before setting it down once more. “Thank you.”

Starfire was practically vibrating out of her skin as she shoved her own gift into her friend’s hands, talking a mile a minute about flying near and far trying to find the absolute perfect match for her dearest roommate. Raven received the gift and her enthusiasm with a cool countenance and unwrapped the slender box as slowly and carefully as she had the first two presents. By the time she pulled the new hijab from the tissue paper, Starfire was squealing at a volume only Beast Boy could hear. The young man made sure to have Raven hold the bit of cloth up for the camera and made several ‘oohing’ and ‘aahing’ noises as Starfire explained where she had had it made.

Garfield could still remember his initial introduction to Islam through his research on hijabs and spotted right away that Starfire had gifted their teammate with an al-amira . It came with two pieces while Raven’s usual shayla was just one. The one Starfire had bought was black with a golden paisley pattern stamped into the silk all around it. The Tamaranian was quick to point out how each of their names was hidden within the detailing in Arabic so that the swooping lines and small dots blended into the paisley. Raven’s calm demeanor slipped only just as she fingered the spot where she had found Dick’s name and Beast Boy zoomed in as tears gathered in the corner of her amethyst eyes. 

“Pretty cool, huh Rae?” he prodded, smiling at her from behind his phone as she shot him a suspicious glare.

“It’s perfect,” she sniffed with a nod, rising from her seat unexpectedly to wrap Starfire in a hug. The boys all cheered and clapped with surprise as Kori made an admirable effort to not crush her teammate in her arms. Within a moment the other girl pulled away and wiped swiftly at her cheeks. “Thank you.”

“You are most welcome, friend Raven!” the orange Titan beamed, green eyes wide with joy. “I am so honored to celebrate your very first day of birth with you, though you did not wish to partake in the Tamaranian tradition of wearing the throknar .”

“No, no meat crowns, please,” Raven intoned, returning to her seat. She kissed the hijab gingerly, returning it to its gift wrapping with extreme care as she gave Star the smallest of smiles. “This is enough.”

“My turn!”

Beast Boy shoved the phone into Cyborg’s hands, reminding him to capture every single detail as he rushed to give Raven his presents. The others had not initially understood the silly young man’s desire to document the day, but when he had explained the idea of Baby’s First Birthday to Star he had immediately gained an ally to his plans. This was Raven’s first time ever celebrating her birthday and he wanted to capture every single memory she made in stunning 4k so they could look back on it in years to come. The same way they would look back on Starfire's first time hosting Klorthog or Robin’s first time receiving an award from the city. They were a family; they had to start acting like it and get some home videos going.

“Happy birthday, Rae.” Beast Boy pushed his bag closer as Raven eyed it warily. The empath and the shapeshifter had only grown closer as time passed and he hoped she knew better than to expect a prank from him on a day like today. “Hope you like ‘em.”

Garfield’s crush on his teammate had grown and evolved right along with their friendship and as she sifted curiously through the mess of tissue paper he had thrown into her gift bag, he found himself desperately hoping that she liked his presents. He’d thought the ideas were funny, but still thoughtful and had nearly spoiled the surprise a dozen times over in his excitement for her to see how much he really did care about her. Hardly registering Victor’s commentary as they all leaned closer to see what was in the bag, Beast Boy kept a critical eye on Raven’s face as she pulled out the first item. He had trained himself over many months to lower his gaze where she was concerned, but he wanted to see her immediate reaction.

Holding the large sweatshirt in front of her, Raven’s face eased through subtle phases of curiosity, confusion, realization, and then a warm humor as she read the message across the front. The shapeshifter's sharp hearing caught a soft exhale of air, a laugh, and his heart soared as his teammate turned the gift around to show their friends and the camera. The sweatshirt was black and plush, made with the softest material Garfield could find. It had a slender hood on the top that could fit over her umpta when she didn’t feel like wearing a scarf and emblazoned across the chest in white letters was the phrase ‘ Just Dua It ’. Raven laughed again, a fuller one this time, and turned her amused smirk to the green boy kneeling at her side.

“Where did you find this?” she wondered, turning the hoodie over in her lap as she looked for a tag. Beast Boy smiled proudly, daring to lean into her space to ease the fabric from her hands.

“I had it made special,” he admitted, glad the blood rushing to his cheeks wasn’t easily visible as he set the hood down on the couch beside her and gestured towards the bag again. “There’s more!”

Raven pulled out a shirt that was obviously far too huge to be for everyday wear and the whole team laughed this time as they read it. ‘ Straight Outta Mecca ’. The nightshirt joined the hoodie on the couch and the young Muslim woman turned to her friend with a thoughtful smile. She said, “Thank you, Garfield, these are very sweet.”

“Happy first birthday,” Beast Boy chuckled, nerves finally getting the best of him as he watched the object of his affections brush her lips across the clothes he’d had made for her. He got up and stumbled away as she placed them back in the bag, taking the camera back from Cyborg in an excited daze. He turned it on selfie mode and shouted, “Alright, that’s Rae’s first birthday in the bag! TIME TO PARTY!”

They were in bed by eight o’clock.

Rachel Roth was a simple creature and so wouldn’t have wanted a crazy party and Beast Boy had known that. He’d sent Starfire for the cake, had Robin pick up some expensive tea, and asked Cyborg to please download her favorite documentary to the living room television. Each with a serving of tea and cake, they sat in perfect silence and learned about ocean life from David Attenborough whose soft, accented voice eased them into a sleepy calm. Slowly, the Teen Titans retired to their rooms one at a time after each wishing Raven another happy birthday until it was only her and Beast Boy left. The green teen entertained them both by morphing into several of the creatures from the documentary, careful to not flop about too wildly, all in the hopes of getting Rae to smile at him again.

She did, a few times, her mouth curving subtly and her chakra diamond glinting in the blue glow of the television as she watched her roommate clap happily at her in the form of a California sea lion. When the credits of the last episode of Blue Planet finally rolled, Garfield helped Raven clear the dishes and gather her gifts. They talked quietly as they worked. About the documentary, about the birthday, about gifts and parties and eventually found their way back to their favorite topic; Islam. Raven whispered about how most celebrations in her religion centered around Ramadan or major individual life events.

“I hear weddings are pretty big,” she mumbled as they made their way towards her bedroom, arms full of presents. “But I’ve never been to one so I can’t really say.”

Beast Boy hummed thoughtfully, noting internally how he had watched several videos of Muslim weddings on late nights when thoughts of Raven wouldn’t let him rest. He would think about the Cinderblock attack, the one and only time he had ever seen her hair, and wonder what man would get to see it some day. Not him surely, he knew you couldn’t marry a member of Islam unless you were also Muslim. Unless…

“Hey, Rae,” he mused, struck by a wild idea right as they reached her door. “How do you become Muslim?”

The sorceress was unfazed, reaching out to pluck her gifts from his arms. It was dark in the hall as she casually answered, “You say the Shahadah . It’s a declaration of faith and when you say it in front of a witness you’re automatically considered Muslim.”

Beast Boy’s heart skipped a beat. Could it really be that easy? “That’s it?”

“That’s it.”

“No priest? No weird baptism or anything?”

Raven frowned, perhaps finally noting the wild energy radiating off him as he gaped down at her. He had gotten a bit taller so she blinked up at him. “You know they’re called an imam for us, but no, you don’t need to have one there.”

Garfield felt as if the universe had just expanded right there in their quiet hallway. Raven had taken the stars and rearranged them thoughtlessly and Beast Boy was left reeling in the aftermath. Suddenly all the secret hopes he had tucked away despairingly didn’t appear so impossible. The tender feelings he had for his teammate, that he kept close to his chest and took out to examine in quiet, lonely moments, now seemed as if maybe they would be allowed to see the light of day. All at once the crushing weight of knowing he would eventually lose the girl in front of him to another was gone and he could breathe properly again. He literally gasped and pressed a hand to his chest, the joy he was feeling threatening to burst right out of him as he smiled.

“Raven,” he enthused, barely holding himself back from reaching out to her, “Raven, I want to convert to Islam!”

“What?” 

He could tell he had truly caught her by surprise by the way her thin eyebrows shot up her forehead. Her mouth stayed partially parted in an adorable little ‘o’ shape and Garfield felt his resolve doubling as he repeated himself. “I want to convert to Islam. You can be my witness and I’ll make a declaration of faith right now!”

Raven’s face shifted through obvious phases of shock, confusion, disbelief, and then a cool irritation as she eyed her teammate critically. Behind her bedroom door something fell off a shelf and Beast Boy watched as she breathed through whatever emotion was trying to take over her. “Beast Boy, you can’t say the Shahadah on a whim.”

“You just said-”

“Yes, you can do it whenever and however you want,” she interrupted, rolling her eyes in a startling display of ire, “But you have to actually believe what you’re saying and say it for the right reasons, or else it means nothing.”

Beast Boy felt as if he understood this sentiment, but still furrowed his brow at his roommate and made a confused gesture with his hands. His dreams, so close to reaching fruition just moments ago, were quickly being dashed in the face of her reasoning. “Well, how am I supposed to prove something like that? Anyone can say they believe something.”

“Exactly,” Raven acquiesced, “You have to actually be ready and willing to accept that there is only one god and that Muhammad is his messenger. You can’t just say it for fun.”

Beast Boy frowned at this, having never given any true thought to religion before meeting Raven at all. He didn’t know what he believed necessarily, but he knew he didn’t want to pay lip service to any entity even if it meant his chances with Raven were increased tenfold. She probably wouldn’t even want him if she thought that was why he was doing it. Letting out a great breath of air, the green teen turned to lean his back against the nearest wall and thumped his head against it. He could feel Raven’s confused gaze searing into the side of his face as he slid down into a sitting position, long legs flopping gracelessly out in front of him.

“What am I supposed to do?” he murmured to the darkness, half forgetting the focus of his desires could hear him as his brain worked overtime to not let this momentary spark of hope die out. His ear twitched in Raven’s direction as she also lowered herself to the ground, grunting daintily as she tried to maneuver all her presents into her lap. When she was finally seated with a huff, Qur’an box and prayer mat still partially cradled in her arms, she frowned at him thoughtfully.

“Why would you even want to convert?” 

Beast Boy’s juniper eyes caught her in a sideways frown and he watched as the empath slowly acknowledged what both of them knew but neither had addressed. Garfield knew he had a crush on Rachel. Raven knew Beast Boy had a crush on her. They both knew that the other knew that they knew. They had just never talked about it and now Beast Boy was all but ready to declare it in front of a mosque full of people if Raven would just let him. They both knew the only chance he would ever have of pursuing her would be if he converted and here she was standing in the way.

But not necessarily saying no…

“Look,” she huffed, cheeks a dusty pink as she glanced up and down the hall furtively. They were all alone. “If you’re serious and you don’t make this whole thing into some sort of stupid prank…I can help you.”

“Really-!”

“But,” she cut him off, eyes already tight with annoyance as she continued, “I won’t let you just fake faith. You have to actually listen and learn about being Muslim starting with the Five Pillars of Islam.”

“What are they?” her teammate prompted, ears pricked up and face happy as he looked at her. Raven was willing to help knowing he wanted to convert for her which meant Raven was open to him pursuing her which meant Raven maybe liked him too and he felt like his heart would explode out of his chest. “When can we start?”

“Well, the first is the profession of faith, but obviously you’re not ready for that so the next would be salat . Prayer.” She began to pick herself up and Gar rushed to help her, grabbing her new hijab and clothes as she stood once more. She fixed him with a neutral look. “You can join me tomorrow for all my prayers. The first one is at dawn.”

Beast Boy nodded excitedly, still beaming in shocked delight that Raven wasn’t just turning him down flat out. He promised, “I won’t let you down, Rae.”

“I hope not.”

Salat

Garfield was already up and waiting in the living room when Raven walked in for her first prayer of the day. The young man felt his ears growing hot as he noted she was wearing her ‘ Straight Outta Mecca ’ shirt over a pair of sleep pants. She had a white hijab wrapped tightly around her neck and her chakra diamond looked blood red in the pale light of near dawn as she approached him, two prayer mats tucked under her arm. She nodded at him.

“Good morning,” she greeted, eyes flitting all up and down his form as if surprised he had actually shown up. “We have a little bit of time before prayer. Ready to start?”

Without hesitation, Beast Boy replied, “Absolutely.”

Raven explained with casual confidence how Muslims prayed facing Mecca five times a day at dawn, noon, mid-afternoon, sunset, and after dark. Muslim men were expected to make their second prayer at a mosque on Fridays, but as a woman she wasn’t required to go. Prayer included a recitation of the opening chapter of the Qur’an and you didn’t necessarily need a prayer mat as long as the area where you prayed was clean. Since he was just starting out, Raven was going to lend Beast Boy her old prayer mat while she used the new one she had been gifted from Victor. She helped him make sure the mihrab was facing the correct direction and then invited him to stand beside her as the sun started to peak over the horizon.

“Fajr has two rakat and we always say them aloud,” she hurried, eyes glancing out the wide windows. “You have to have good intentions in your heart to pray to Allah before you start.”

“Got it,” her teammate nodded, wiping his sweaty palms along his pajama bottoms as he watched her bring her hands up to shoulder length before folding them over her chest in a light hug as she spoke. Her eyes were closed.

“Allahu Akbar,” she said quietly but clearly and Beast Boy realized he had never actually heard Raven pray before. He mirrored her motions hesitantly as she recited the sura , bowing with his hands on his knees while she chanted, “ Subhaana rabbiy al-Adheem, subhaana rabbiy al-Adheem, subhaana rabbiy al-Adheem. ”

Her throaty voice was a constant hum through the room as she continued through the motions of the prayer. She rose from the bow, raised her hands again, then lowered herself to a kneeling position, her forehead touching the ground lightly as she continued. Raven had specifically told Garfield not to mirror this pose since he wasn’t a true believer yet, but he watched her every move intently from his spot sated back against his thighs. She repeated, “ Subhaana rabbiy al-Adheem, subhaana rabbiy al-Adheem, subhaana rabbiy al-Adheem. ”

She sat up, eyes still closed, and Garfield knew from her description earlier that she was reflecting on her prayer. She touched her forehead to the ground again. “Allahu Akbar.”

When the first unit of prayer was done Raven repeated it again. Beast Boy watched and mimicked and even took some time to reflect on his intentions when they were seated the second time around. Hands folded in his lap, he imagined doing this ritual four more times in the day and surrounded by others in a public place on Friday. It didn’t sound so bad at all. By the time they were done, dawn was truly underway and Raven admitted they had been a bit behind that day as you were usually meant to finish before light was really visible. Garfield apologized for throwing her off schedule, but she waved him off and asked to borrow his phone which he had left sitting on the couch while they prayed.

“There’s tons of apps you can use to remind you what time you’re meant to pray,” she explained, downloading him the same one she used and immediately setting up the alarms. “The sun doesn’t always rise at the same time every day so this connects with your weather app to automatically adjust your alarms.”

“That’s awesome,” he chuckled sincerely, taking his phone back when she offered it and taking some time to explore this new tool on his device. Their teammates would be rising soon and he knew Raven still needed to do her morning meditation and so he was quick to thank her for her time and start heading towards the kitchen. “See you at noon?”

“See you at noon.”

The rest of the prayers for the day went smoothly. Their mid-afternoon prayer was pushed back by an emergency in the city, but Raven assured as long as they recited their rakat as soon as possible or added them into the next salat , things were fine. Each time they met by the tall living room windows, Raven would elaborate a bit more on the process, describing how he was meant to sit and explaining it was customary to wash before coming to the mat. Even with the length of time needed doubling when they said their last prayer of the day, the whole process didn’t take long at all and Raven assured him it was not meant to be time consuming or tedious.

“It’s just a quick moment to acknowledge Allah’s presence and reflect on your day,” she explained, rolling her prayer mat up slowly so that Beast Boy could copy her movements. He would be keeping her old one in his room now.

“It’s pretty cool,” he admitted, tucking the bit of rolled fabric under his arm as they stood. The rest of their team had retired to their rooms as they usually did during Raven’s prayer time, but it was still early so he imagined Cyborg would be out again soon to play videogames which he was looking forward to. “Am I ready to say the Shahadah yet?”

He was teasing her, but not in an arrogant or ignorant way so Raven only scoffed, reaching up to adjust her shayla absently as she shook her head. “Absolutely not. Let's see how you feel after a few days of this."

For the rest of the week Garfield joined Rachel in all her prayers and on Friday she accompanied him to a mosque in the city for dhuhr. It was more crowded than he had expected from Jump, but he was happy to see the way everyone welcomed them and the few women present flocked to Raven as they all made themselves comfortable in their separate praying area. That had been a surprise, that they wouldn’t be able to sit together at mosque, but Raven reminded him she likely wouldn’t come to Friday prayer with him more than a few times as he adjusted. She’d asked if he was having any doubts as they were parting ways.

He assured, “Not at all!”

Zakat

The Teen Titans rarely spoke with each other or with the public on the subject of their paychecks. Super heroes, as altruistic as they were, were still people with lives and needs and lots of equipment that required funding. While older members of teams like the Justice League or independent heroes like Batman didn’t accept any form of payment for their work, younger organizations had negotiated monthly stipends from their respective cities. If a bunch of teenagers were taking on the responsibility of protecting the innocent while neglecting schooling, family, and personal safety it only seemed right that the government take care of them the best it could.

Before joining the Titans, Beast Boy had blown all his Doom Patrol money on gadgets and videogames and food and fun. It wasn’t until Victor had taken a look at his personal finances that the cyborg had sat his friend down and discussed the benefits of a savings account. Being frugal with his income had never occurred to the shapeshifter, but he took the advice to heart and had started putting aside a small portion of each paycheck for necessities and emergencies. After falling for Raven he had put even more aside just because she seemed like the type of person who would admire that sort of responsible behavior. As soon as the empath had described the idea of zakat, Beast Boy knew he had made the right choice.

Raven explained how, in accordance with Islamic law, Muslims donated a fixed portion of their income to community members in need. It was their choice when and how to donate, but several wealthier people put money towards building mosques, fountains, hospitals, or schools. To meet this religious duty, Raven made a yearly donation to a small library run by an Islamic family who went to the same mosque Beast Boy attended every Friday. Her alms were given anonymously, but she had basically been single handedly patroning the building for several years now, so large were her donations. All her savings, she admitted, were established for zakat.

Beast Boy employed Dick’s help to find a noble cause to donate to. Their teammates had given him and Raven plenty of respect and space as he went through the process of preparing to convert. Kori was probably the most supportive, making great announcements of admiration every time she saw them laying out their prayer mats or walked in on Raven quietly reading a chapter of the Qur’an to her green roommate. Cyborg was intrigued by the new development, but ultimately said it was none of his business as long as Beast Boy’s new religion didn’t keep him from playing video games. Raven assured it wouldn’t. Robin had been the only one to take Beast Boy aside and questioned if he was doing this for the right reasons.

“You can’t just pretend to believe what she believes so that Raven will like you, Beast Boy,” he’d said, face serious and fingers steepled under his chin. Garfield had promised his team leader that wasn’t his intention at all and after a rather intense staring contest, Robin had wished him luck and promised to lend a hand in any way he could. Beast Boy took him up on that as he contemplated his zakat .

Dick Greyson made several community donations throughout the year just because that was the type of person he was. He donated to orphanages, arts centers, dojos, and lots of other things. It was a quality he had no doubt picked up from Batman; Bruce Wayne was Gotham’s most well known benefactor. As such, he had all the know-how about finding reputable, legitimate organizations to give money to and Beast Boy was grateful for the help. They researched clinics and colleges and shelters and lots of other things. Dick suggested he donate to the Wayne Foundation, but Garfield reasoned that they were hardly in need. He wanted his alms to go to someone or somewhere that could really use it. Plus Raven had explained that zakat had to be given to other members of Islam. It was a hard find.

In the end it was Starfire that discovered the perfect place. She flew into the living room excitedly right as Beast Boy and Raven were finishing maghrib and shoved a flyer into the green boy’s hands. It was for an animal shelter in Jump City that housed elder and ailing animals. The goal was not to get the creatures adopted out, but instead to ensure their last few years were filled with comfort and love. The building was old and rundown, the rooms were small and empty, and they were desperately in need of patrons to donate funds and furniture. The owners were a young Muslim couple that had just moved to the states and had very little support. Beast Boy swore he could have kissed Kori as he whooped with joy, showing the bit of cut up newspaper to Raven. She agreed it seemed like a perfect fit for him and smiled as he punched the air in excitement.

After Robin checked the place out, Cyborg helped Beast Boy set up a separate bank account that automatically transferred a fixed amount of funds to the shelter every month. It was anonymous and the code used to wire the money would change every few weeks. Once that was done, the entire team scoured their home for old pillows, blankets and even chairs that no longer served them and traveled through Raven’s void to the shelter to drop off their alms. The pretty hijabi that greeted them was frenzied and talking about a huge donation they had just received and Gar could feel his chest swelling with pride as he looked over at Raven. She was bent down petting an elderly cat down by their feet. He beamed at her.

“Can I say the Shahadah now?”

The young woman smirked, not turning her eyes up from the old tabby as she answered. She was wearing her ‘Just Dua It’ hoodie.  “Not yet.”

Sawm

The next pillar of Islam took some time to complete. Raven’s birthday had been in mid October and Beast Boy made his first zakat in late December, but to participate in sawm they had to wait until Ramadan which was all the way in April. The shapeshifter had been a bit put out when he’d realized this, but Raven was quick to remind him not to get in over his head. They still prayed together every day and any time not spent doing hero work, hanging out with their team, or meeting their basic human needs was spent with the empath giving her roommate basic lessons on Islam.

As the weeks passed Rachel taught Garfield several aspects of the religion he had never really known before. Such as there were different sects to Islam; Sunni, Shi’ite, and Sufis were the major ones. Raven herself was Sunni, but also Sufis because she was a mystic and sought spiritual growth through meditation. Garfield would likely only be Sunni. The sorceress also described for him the types of things that would be considered halal versus things that would be haram . The green teen was happy to hear his plant-based diet would not be in jeopardy since veganism was very important to him. Luckily, all fruits and veggies were halal . 

It had been interesting for Beast Boy to realize that while Raven was not strictly vegan as he was, she also avoided most animal products besides certain dairy and fish. The two of them began preparing their meals together and shared different recipes they thought the other would enjoy. Raven was slow to incorporate tofu into her diet, but eventually the two could be found enjoying a nice tofu and quinoa salad after noon prayers and splitting green smoothies at dawn. The rest of the Teen Titans were intrigued by the new activities in the kitchen and even enjoyed some of the lunches their teammates prepared, but ultimately they stuck to their own food. Eventually they all worked together to reorganize the fridge so Beast Boy and Raven’s halal items were near the top away from everyone else’s haram stuff. Garfield actually felt a bit bad they hadn’t considered doing it before.

So the months passed. Garfield and Rachel prayed, cooked, and learned together everyday and everyday the green teen grew more and more enamored with his roommate. Raven was kind and smart and patient. She never made fun of Beast Boy’s clumsy Arabic as he practiced the Qur’an, or got upset with him if he forgot to utter ‘bismillāh’ before starting something. Instead she just made gentle corrections; reaching out to adjust his sujud, or reminding him to leave his phone behind before heading to Friday prayer. Everyday he fell more and more in love with her.

He nearly rescinded that feeling when Ramadan started.

Ramadan went from April second to May second that year and by the third hour of the first day of fasting Beast Boy thought his stomach would cave in and eat itself. He complained loudly all throughout the tower of his hunger and while his teammates were sympathetic, none of them offered to sneak him a morsel of food as he had been hoping. Flung across the couch, the shapeshifter dramatically informed Raven he was not long for this world, head practically resting on her knee. The hijbabi only snorted, not lifting her eyes from the book she was reading. It was a book about the horrors of the meat packing industry Beast Boy had gifted her on a random Thursday in December. Definitely not for Christmas because Rachel didn’t celebrate Christmas and now neither did Garfield. 

“I told you to eat before fajr,” she chided, one delicate brow raised as she turned the page. Garfield scowled up at her mildly.

“I wasn’t hungry before fajr,” he grouched, turning onto his side so that he was facing towards the giant livingroom television. He was also abstaining from video games for the month since he knew they sometimes got his temper up and Ramadan was meant to be a time of spiritual reflection and self-improvement; they even had extra prayers to say after they broke their fast at maghrib. 

Beast Boy hardly believed he was going to last that long and could only be thankful the rest of their team were taking their meals in their rooms for these first few days as he adjusted. Another accommodation the green teen felt guilty he hadn’t suggested for Rae earlier on in their friendship. Luckily, the empath ate very little on a regular day and so the over twelve hours without food or drink didn’t seem to really affect her. She admitted to being slightly fatigued after their sunset prayer, lack of tea meaning she hadn’t had any caffeine since before dawn, but other than that she was fine. Garfield envied her strength.

The shapeshifter ate so much during his first iftar that he was struck with almost immediate stomach cramps and had to be carried to his room by Victor. The cyborg poked fun at his miserable state, but also took a moment to tell his friend how proud he was of his progress and tell him Raven was lucky to have someone as devoted as him vying for her hand. Beast Boy gave a weak thumbs up at the praise before curling in on himself with pain. After multiple trips to the bathroom, he swore to Allah he would not indulge so greedily the next day and would take his Muslim mentor’s advice about eating before morning prayer so that he didn’t go mad with hunger. Aforementioned mentor checked in on him before retiring for the night. Perched on the edge of his bed, Raven let him know she would be preparing him a suhur for the morning whether he wanted it or not. He assured her he wanted it.

“Am I ready to say the Shahadah yet?” he slurred into his pillow, eyes closed and hands clutched over his gut as Raven moved to leave. She was standing at his door, hand poised on the frame as she studied him. Beast Boy swore he could feel her gaze like a caress. 

He was so in love with her.

She mused, “Almost.”

“Insha’allah,” was the gurgled reply before he dropped off to sleep. 

The rest of the month was much better. Gar and Rachel ate a protein-packed breakfast each morning before the sun began to crawl over the horizon and broke their fasts after maghrib   every night. In the last three days they celebrated Eid Al-Fitr and the whole team participated. It was a fun, boisterous night of eating and music and laughing until they were called to stop an attack by Mumbo in the city. Still, Beast Boy had a good time and was more determined than ever to convert as soon as possible.

Hajj

The wait to complete the next pillar of Islam was not nearly so long as it had been to participate in sawm . Raven had informed him one morning that the season to make the pilgrimage to Mecca was nearly upon them. Every Muslim whose health and finances allowed was expected to make the trip to the holy city at least once in their lives; she had gone at fifteen before the Titans were formed. The empath had shown Beast Boy a picture of the Ka’ba and he’d recognized the black cube from her prayer mat with no shortage of interest. Raven had explained how it was believed this was the house Abraham built for Allah and was what they were actually facing when they prayed every day. Garfield had been excited to see it in person.

So at the very start of July the two heroes had put in for a leave of absence from their team and as soon as their temporary replacements arrived, they’d been on a series of flights to Saudi Arabia. The more connections they’d made, the more Muslims they’d encountered also making the hajj and Beast Boy had been delighted to meet each and every one of them. Everyone who heard he was planning to convert gave him praise and blessings and he didn’t think he’d ever hear ‘As-salamu alaykum!’ as many times again in his life. The young man had never felt more ingrained into a community than when he pressed his forehead to his prayer mat in the airport in Jordan, at least thirty other men performing the asr with him. 

It had been great.

Reaching Mecca and seeing the Ka’ba had been great.

Getting to pray in public beside Raven had been great.

Then Trigon had attacked right as they were making their sixth tawaf around the Ka’ba.

Garfield couldn’t have imagined a worse time or place for his teammate's father to appear. The absolute, horrified panic that erupted from the crowd had been enough to put his teeth on edge as he and Raven immediately set about saving the day. The sorceress had confronted her sire head on, a terrible battle exploding the sky miles above the city as Beast Boy had rushed to evacuate everyone safely. There’d been screaming and praying and general chaos everywhere he looked, but he’d kept a level head and herded the crowd of innocents away from the mosque, making sure to clear every hall and ablution area as the sounds of Raven’s fight echoed across the desert. It felt like mere minutes and somehow endless hours had simultaneously passed when there had been a terrible roar and flash of light as Trigon was banished back to wherever he had come from. Raven had fallen from the sky like a shooting star and Beast Boy had rushed to catch her, his heart lodged somewhere in his throat as he took note of her injuries.

“Is…e-everyone…alright?” she’d questioned, eyes glazed over and face pale as the deep wound in her stomach bled messily onto her teammate’s trembling hands. He’d nodded frantically, mind racing for where he could take her. “Ka’ba?”

Beast Boy had looked over his shoulder at the black building looming over them, untouched by the terror that had nearly unfolded since Raven had acted so quickly and bravely. A tear slipped down his cheek as he turned back to her. “It’s still standing.”

That last bit of information appeared to have been the only thing staving off her shock because she’d promptly fainted and Beast Boy had been left to navigate his way to a hospital on his own. If the medical staff at KAMC were shocked to see a young green man with a half dead woman cradled in his arms, they hid it well as they immediately rushed into action to stabilize Raven. Gar had rattled off what pieces of her medical history he knew as they worked on her. He noticed quite belatedly that every person in the room was a woman wearing a hijab, only realizing it when they asked him to please step out. They needed to check her head for injuries. They needed to remove her head scarf. He wasn’t allowed to see her like that.

The wait for them to save Raven’s life had been awful.

Sitting and worrying why her healing powers hadn’t kicked in had been awful.

Calling the team to tell them she was maybe going to die had been awful.

Then a kindly older woman in a khimar had come out and told him Raven was going to make it and he could go sit with her.

So there he sat, head in his hands and Raven resting silently in the bed across from him. The al-amira she’d gotten from Starfire had been ripped and bloodied in her fight and so the hospital staff had wrapped her head in a disposable surgical hijab to protect her modesty. Beast Boy had thanked them profusely for the consideration, his imperfect Arabic falling clumsily from his lips. They’d accepted his thanks, praised his efforts in getting his friend to them so quickly, and then left the two Titans alone. Beast Boy had not moved from his seat since and his neck and head slowly began to ache. Raven slept on, wrapped all in bandages and still bruised around her face and hands.

The whole night went by and when his alarm for morning prayer sounded from his pocket, Garfield was half unconscious, eyes swollen and back stiff. He fished his phone out, noting the cracked screen with a sigh as he turned off the happy little tune playing from his reminder app. It was still dark outside the window and the green teen considered for half a moment just skipping fajr. He was tired, Raven was hurt, and he didn't feel like making up the four rakat he had missed the night before. He considered it and then promptly dismissed the thought away as he stood, stretching painfully, and traipsed around Raven’s bed to find a good place to stand. If there was ever a time he needed to acknowledge and thank Allah for his kindness it was now, after his teammate’s life had been narrowly saved. He needed to reflect on all her teachings and his own desires while still in the holy city even if he wasn’t in front of Ka’ba.

After finding a clear spot, Beast Boy tiredly wiped the floor clear of any dust or dirt, washed his face, neck, hands and arms at the sink in the corner, and then oriented himself to face the correct direction. Out in the hall and from beyond the window he could hear soft bells ringing calling people to prayer as he closed his eyes and put his hands up by his shoulders. He hugged himself. With a whoosh of air he began, “Allahu Akbar.”

He wasn’t as practiced at leading the prayer as Raven, but he’d said it enough at her side and at mosque for the words to come to him easily. The motions too were second nature and as he bowed down, hands on his knees, he thought about his intentions for the prayer. “Subhaana rabbiy al-Adheem, subhaana rabbiy al-Adheem, subhaana rabbiy al-Adheem.”

He rose from the bow, raised his hands again, then lowered himself to a kneeling position, his palms and forehead touching the ground lightly as he continued reciting the first chapter of the Qur’an. At this point his sujud was nearly perfect and he wished Raven could see it as he sat back on his thighs and took time to reflect. As he sat, Beast Boy thought about everything he and the empath had been through over the last nine months. For nearly a year he had been working devoutly to learn all he could about Islam and convert and now at the tail end of his efforts he had nearly lost the person who it was all for. His chest squeezed painfully at the idea Raven had nearly not survived to see the end of his hajj ; had nearly died trying to help him. 

Tears tracked down his jade cheeks as he imagined life without Raven. It hardly seemed like a life at all. He pressed his forehead to the floor again. “Subhaana rabbiy al-A'la, subhaana rabbiy al-A'la, subhaana rabbiy al-A'la.”

When the first unit of prayer was done Garfield repeated it six times. Two for the usual fajr and another four for the isha he had missed the previous night. He didn’t cry through all of them but it was a near thing. As he began the final steps of the last rakat , he sat back again and thought on what he wanted his personal prayer to Allah to consist of. He thought about how he wanted Raven to recover and for her father to never breach their universe ever again. Eyes still tacky with tears, he murmured, “ Audhu billahi min ash-shaytan ir-rajim.”

“Beast Boy?”

Raven’s tiny voice yanked Garfield’s eyes open and when he saw her tired eyes squinting down at him, he nearly jumped to her side. Except prayer wasn’t over. With herculean effort he remained knelt on the floor, turning his head left and right as quickly but still respectfully as he could. In both directions he chanted,  “As-salamu alaikum wa rahmatullah.”

Rakat officially finished, the Teen Titan rushed to his teammate’s side, hands flitting nervously in the air above her, not sure where to touch or if to touch at all. She looked so tiny all bundled in bandages and Beast Boy could feel the tightness that had been smothering him during prayer returning. Barely holding himself together he kept his hands to himself, but leaned into her personal space worriedly. He gasped, “Raven! Are you alright?!”

“I’m fine,” she mumbled, brow pinched in confusion or pain or something. Garfield nodded dumbly, cheeks feeling cold and tight from his crying earlier. 

“Your powers didn’t heal you right away,” he informed, gesturing vaguely at her battered frame beneath the hospital sheets, “I was so worried-!”

“You were praying,” she interrupted, mouth barely moving since her bottom lip was split and probably very sore, “Without me?”

“What? Oh!” Beast Boy glanced at the window. Dawn was just beginning to paint the sky a pale grey and he turned back to his roommate with an apologetic grimace. “Yeah, sorry, you missed fajr . Do you want me to do it again?”

She shook her head with great effort, pupils blown wide as she blinked up at him. The doctors had said she had a concussion and the shapeshifter wondered if her head was hurting. Probably. She looked dazed as she went on, “You led the rakat , said a personal prayer, and finished all on your own?”

The young man wasn’t sure what she was getting at and told her as such in a low murmur. He figured Raven was likely very close to falling unconscious again as her eyes continued to fade in and out of focus, but she insisted on her bed being raised into a sitting position. She was clearly nauseous by the time she was upright, but she schooled her features diligently as she breathed through it, Beast Boy perched on the edge of her bed with a hand poised to prop her up in case she flopped over. When the feeling had apparently passed, the empath fixed him with a meaningful look and folded her hands delicately in her lap.

“Garfield,” she said seriously, “I think you’re ready to say the Shahadah.”

“What?” He was sure his surprise was obvious from the way his thick eyebrows shot up his forehead. “Rae…now’s not a good time-”

“You protected thousands of Muslims from an attack by a literal demon, helped defend Ka’ba, and still remembered to take time to thank Allah while sitting at my sickbed.”

“Yeah, but-"

“I believe you now,” she cut across him, breathing deeply from exhaustion or determination or something. “I believe you’re really ready to accept Allah and Mohammad into your life.”

Coming from her, the words meant absolutely everything and the green teen wiped embarrassedly at his cheeks as even more tears fell from his eyes. Still though, he resisted. “Rae, you still haven’t healed. We can wait til we’re home and-”

“I won’t heal myself until you make a declaration of faith,” she insisted, sitting back with a huff as her teammate gaped at her. When she put it that way…

“Fine.”

It took a few minutes for her to teach him the declaration, the process likely extended by her need to take frequent breaks to fight off dizziness and fatigue. The concussion was really doing its worst so Beast Boy made sure to listen attentively so that she could rest soon. After practicing the phrase back and forth a few times, Raven declared him ready and sat back, looking expectant as Garfield took a deep breath. He was about to convert to Islam and essentially start a whole new life and he owed it all to the girl lain out before him. Feeling bold, he reached out and grasped her hand in his, selfishly needing to borrow some of her dwindling strength before he began. He closed his eyes.

“Ashhadu en la illaha-illalah, wa-ashhadu ‘ana Muhammadan Rasuli-llah.”

Beast Boy wasn’t sure what he expected to happen after he recited the Shahadah; maybe a feeling of elation or understanding to wash over him. Nothing of note occurred besides the chest tightness he had been experiencing easing a bit as he opened his eyes and found Raven staring back at him. Her gaze was droopy and soft when she squeezed his hand, a small smile gracing her still very pretty face as she nodded.

“That was perfect,” she intoned quietly, “Congratulations.”

“Thanks,” her teammate replied, still waiting for the sky to fall as he sat gingerly down on the side of her bed. They were still holding hands. He implored, “Will you please heal yourself now? I called the team, but they won’t be here in the T-Ship until tomorrow.”

Raven smirked, paper hijab crinkling around her head as she nodded. “Fine. Go get something to eat while I do that though. I can hear your stomach rumbling.”

Beast Boy choked on a laugh, having hardly thought of food at all since Trigon appeared and certainly not while Raven was still unconscious. “Fine. I’ll wake you for noon prayer?”

“See you at noon.”

“Insha’allah.”