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"i've been here too long."
ayaka squeezes kokomi's hand slightly. they're sat on the edge of her bed, the divine priestess resting since she returned home to see her girlfriend of just a few months waiting for her. ayaka's arrival at watatsumi island had been a secret, and the shrine maidens had been in on it, being aware of the two girls' relationship. ayaka had been able to sneak in and dwell for a few hours, already cloaked in a pair of borrowed pyjamas by the time kokomi's returned home, terribly exhausted and disgruntled.
ayaka knew she was restless and a workaholic, so she is gentle with her, although she has always been a gentle person. compared to the chaos of watatsumi island after the abolition of the vision hunt decree, especially sangonomiya shrine, ayaka is a breath of fresh air.
"would you like to talk about anything?" she asks.
"no, thank you," kokomi sighs. "but thank you for your support. i'm glad you're here. otherwise, i'd be pushing myself to keep working."
"i do hope you lose that unhealthy habit at some point in this relationship," ayaka frowns.
kokomi blushes at the mention, still easily flustered, but comfortable enough to laugh. "probably not. unless i'm relieved of duty anytime soon, or asassinated, i will never stop pushing myself."
"asassinated?" ayaka gasps, bewildered.
"watatsumi island's reputation isn't nearly as pretty as the place itself is." kokomi explains, then checks her reflection in her mirror and notices how worn out she is. "anyway... i'm exhausted."
"then, it's your turn," ayaka says softly, and the divine priestess knows what she means.
she slips off her heels, then slowly and tiredly starts to remove her stockings.
ayaka slips onto the floor.
kokomi flusters but laughs at her. "why have you chosen that angle, of all the choices?"
"because i want to see all of you," ayaka replies, earnest, taking the other girl's ankle into her hand. "and you're exhausted. i want to take care of you, will you let me?"
kokomi covers a side of her face, growing red as well as the tops of her shoulders, with one hand and nods.
ayaka begins pulling off the article, one hand holding the back of kokomi's lower thigh and sliding the fabric down at the same time.
kokomi thinks that this is not fair. why isn't she a blushing mess?
she probably wouldn't tease her, or have less-than-pure intentions behind it, but she can't help but feel exposed and bare. flustered. her heart pounds threateningly against her rib cage. she wonders if ayaka can hear it. she hopes not.
ayaka lets go of the stocking, setting it on the floor when she sees purple scales on the sides of her girlfriend's calves. she looks up at her with wonder, lips parted in surprise.
kokomi takes back the previous mental musings. perhaps she would benefit for ayaka to tease her a little more. then she could at least play off her weak-in-the-knees, heart-rate-five-times-the-average-pace, hopeless desire as frustration, just to save her dignity once, please, she wishes, drawing slightly back from ayaka's adoring, curious and so so dangerously inviting gaze and answers the silent question quietly, burning. "it's complicated."
"we don't have to talk about it," ayaka reassures her, laying a warm and soft hand on her knee. it's comforting. although ayaka is overwhelming with her honesty and kindness, she is comforting. kokomi thinks that she would love to see her after every stressful day of running an entire civilization, on the days she can handle it and the days she can't. "i'm sorry if i crossed any boundaries."
"you didn't," kokomi dismisses with a fond curve to her lips. "you can continue, if you like."
ayaka presses a gentle kiss to her bare knee in thanks, then proceeds to pull the other stocking off with same pace and care.
she rests her chin on kokomi's knees, gazing up at her girlfriend. "what else can i do for you, my lady?"
"y-you don't have to, ayaka."
"it's alright," ayaka says, offering a content smile. "i want to."
"...um, you can take out my hair for me, then..."
"may i guide you over to your vanity?" ayaka asks, placing a hand out for kokomi to take as she stands gracefully. she enjoys the way kokomi's cheeks and shoulders blossom with pink just by the shirasagi himegimi being around her. not to mention the way her shoulders seemed lighter and she held herself easier. even if things didn't work out between them, ayaka prayed kokomi would always have someone who made her life easier for her.
kokomi notices ayaka staring. they've sat at her vanity. or, kokomi has sat, and ayaka stayed standing behind her.
the divine priestess won't meet her eyes, the color blooming on her skin intensifying, but she won't hesitate to speak her mind with ayaka.
"you're so careful with me, i've noticed. you are a gentle person, but when you handle me, it's as if i am but a crystalfly to you."
"you deserve to be handled this way," ayaka says, starting to take out hairpins and place them into kokomi's open hand. "carefully, thoughtfully, gently. and i will always be gentle with you."
kokomi nibbles on her bottom lip, flustered. ayaka reaches around, places her thumb on it and carefully pulls it out of the clasp of her teeth, sure not to rip the skin in the process.
"another bad habit."
"please," kokomi rolls her eyes. "you must have bad habits too, miss perfect."
"of course i do. but tonight is about you."
ayaka must be teasing her now. she keeps her thumb on kokomi's bottom lip, caressing it slightly. what is her expression? what goes through her mind when she does these shameless earnest things? "your lips are very soft."
"please just end my suffering and kiss me," kokomi mutters.
"suffering? i'm trying to please you."
"it's t-" kokomi cuts herself off from what she was about to say. "it's not too much. i'm not familiar with it."
"neither am i. but i like this new manner, and if you like it, too, i wish to use it with you."
kokomi hums in thought. ayaka takes out the last hairpin and the rest of her hair falls.
"depends whether or not this manner is natural to you."
"nothing has ever been more natural," ayaka promises, pressing a kiss to the top of kokomi's head.
"then i like it."
ayaka smiles. she's so happy, she's smiled more tonight than she ever has, even dancing. she never knew she liked taking care of someone so much. "may you pass me the brush?"
kokomi reaches in front of the mirror and hands it to her. she gently runs it through her girlfriend's hair, and though it feels like there are only a few knots, the brush runs through with ease.
when ayaka sets the brush on the vanity, she curiously runs her fingers through kokomi's hair to find that it's thick and smooth as silk.
"ayaka?" kokomi asks.
"mmhm?"
"just because i'm a divine priestess doesn't mean you have to worship me."
"i worship you because i am enamored with you, not because you are a priestess." ayaka twirls a strand of kokomi's locks around her pinky finger. "everything about you is soft."
kokomi grunts in protest and points to her fins on either side of her head.
"they're cute, though," ayaka beams, and kokomi clears her throat, averting her eyes and blushing furiously.
"may i touch them?"
"p-please be gentle.... they're delicate."
to be careful, ayaka starts at the base of the fin, thumbing right where kokomi's roots separate from her hair into the purple.... what are they? they're smooth and cold, thin but hard-
kokomi shivers and ayaka retracts her hand.
"...and sensitive."
"sorry, are you alright?"
kokomi nods. "i'm just not used to people touching them."
"do you want me to keep touching them?"
the priestess shrugs. "only if you want to..."
"my pearl, please tell me what you want."
"fine, fine," kokomi replies hastily, voice airy. "it's not because i don't like you touching them, though, i trust you, i just want-" the girl releases an exasperated groan and lets her forehead fall onto ayaka's stomach. "i just want to sleep. next to you. please."
ayaka cups her cheek in understanding, her other hand threading through the gaps between kokomi's fingers as an answer. they stand and the shirasagi himegimi twirls the divine priestess.
they giggle, their breaths harmonizing, and ayaka lands lightly on the mattress kokomi gently pushes her onto.
she fiddles with the ends of the bow on kokomi's chest. "how do you take this off?"
"first, i need to take off the vision so it doesn't get damaged." kokomi unclips her vision from the bow and sets it on the bed.
"now you can untie it."
"oh, i may do the honors?" ayaka tugs the ends of the bow with both hands and it easily comes undone. her sleeves fall looser on her arms, and kokomi pulls the whole thing over her head.
ayaka gasps. "may i touch?"
kokomi nods, heartbeat fast and eyes wide, but she's never been more comfortable this exposed. with ayaka it just feels right and so good in a way she can't explain.
ayaka settles her fingertips on kokomi's stomach. they are soft but cold and kokomi shivers but leans into the touch. ayaka leans forward and presses a gentle kiss above her belly button. her mouth is warm. her lips are soft and her eyelashes tickle kokomi's skin. a giggle escapes her and ayaka pulls back, her normally cloudy gray eyes clear and adoring. she motions for kokomi to lean down, so she does, and her girlfriend kisses her softly, capturing kokomi's lips in hers. she's not as overwhelmed this time as she thought she would be, so kokomi pushes a bit, wanting to sit, wanting to be held, wanting so bad for it to be ayaka holding her. kokomi sets her hands on the girl's thighs, and ayaka paints her body in a portrait with her fingertips. kokomi thinks she feels snow trail along her sides, feather-light, but she knows ayaka's cupping her waist and it tingles, pressing flush to her back and pulling her closer and it's grounding, circling her hipbones and it's captivating. kokomi sighs contentedly, wishing they could stay like this forever. wishing ayaka could touch her like this forever.
she pulls away, lingering like the rest of her touch has been the whole night, takes kokomi's hands and flips them. she stands straight and watches, doesn't hear, ayaka whisper sweet nothings presses to her pulse, fingers curling around kokomi's own. they both grow warmer, with every second savored.
kokomi smiles, never having felt more precious, eyes shining, cheeks and shoulders warming. she leans in again, standing in between ayaka's legs, which spread so she can get close, wrapping her arms loosely around her girlfriend's neck.
"i want to kiss you again," ayaka tells her, "but i have to emphasize the fact that you are wearing a very specific color that happens to be the exact color of my hair."
kokomi laughs quietly. "really? staring at the color, and not the assets?"
"assets?" ayaka giggles. when she giggles her eyes sparkle and a dimple in her left cheek reveals itself. (kokomi's going to kiss it one day.) "well, i was staring at those too."
kokomi laughs as well. "this is cheesy, but i'm naturally drawn to blue. i always have been. maybe it's coincidence, because i have a hydro vision, but." she shrugs. "i've always liked to believe in fate."
ayaka kisses the back of her hand. "and more scales? fins?"
kokomi shrugs again. "i hope they only add to your curiosity."
"they do. just what are you, exactly?"
kokomi smirks and sits on her lap, straddling her hips. "would it be wrong to say i'm the woman of your dreams?"
"not at all."
kokomi cradles ayaka's face kissing her deeply and tenderly, and ayaka settles her hands on kokomi's waist but dares to grip it, to hold her. the divine priestess gives a sigh of approval. ayaka tightens her grip, just a bit, discovering how sensitive kokomi's skin is when her breath catches in her throat, mouth trembling a little against hers in that second.
ayaka wants to hear that lovely, enticing sound and more, as much as kokomi would give her.
she closes the distance between their bodies. their stomachs press flush against each other. their lips follow suit and lock, eyelashes tickling cheeks and heads turning, but their hearts ask, is this as close as we can be?
kokomi and ayaka pull away for a second, already both pink and slightly out of breath, feeling each other's heartbeats synced through the extra layers.
we want closer.
kokomi fixes her eyes on a mole on ayaka's neck to avoid looking her in the eyes, but she finds herself wanting to kiss it. "a-ayaka, this.. this will be my first time."
"mine too."
"we.. we don't have to stay together afterwards, i know it happens-"
"kokomi, for as long as i love you i will stay."
"you love me?" kokomi asks, voice faint with disbelief.
"i wouldn't touch you as if you would fade if i didn't. i wouldn't talk as if i could shatter you. i wouldn't hold you like this. i wouldn't even be here, if i didn't."
ayaka places a gentle kiss on kokomi's kiss-plush lips, then pulls away only a few centimetres. her breath warms kokomi's mouth as she speaks, and all the divine priestess, her excellency who always had an answer, who was prepared for every possibility, every outcome could do was stare down at her, wide-eyed and speechless.
"i haven't fallen in love before you. growing up i was always afraid because i was so alone i never would, and if i did, i wouldn't know it, but when i fell for you i knew immediately, kokomi. you give me a feeling no one has ever given me before."
ayaka smiles up at her and kisses her again, gentler than the last one. "you don't have to say it back."
kokomi shakes her head and pecks her on the lips, just as delicate. "i love you, ayaka."
they smile wide against each other's lips, crashing down to the bed, and don't speak much again for the rest of the night.