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There’s noises, that much Mark knew. The dip of the mattress and the squeak of springs. He’d have to remember that. The hotel said they were memory foam and he’d have to complain about that later. He wants to reach out, to maybe say something, anything to convince the bed’s other occupant to stay. Just for a few minutes. Falcon never stayed, and there was just something so heartbreaking about history repeating itself. Different cities, different beds, but the ending was always the same; Falcon leaves and Mark’s heart breaks a little more each time.
He can hear the sound of Falcon breathing and his own heart beating loudly in his chest that for a moment he wonders if the other man can hear it. Wonders if he even cares. But Mark swallows down his pride, a large mass that sits heavy in his stomach and leaves his throat sore. “Were you really about to leave without saying goodbye?” he says almost in a whisper, his voice rough with sleep and his lips are dry. He cracks his eyes open and sees that Falcon’s back is to him. Did he even hear him? Mark wouldn’t blame him if he didn’t. The brief thought that Falcon was ignoring him on purpose made his heart throb but now was not the time for him to realize that maybe he was catching feelings for the other man.
Falcon shifted, so he did hear me . Mark can’t help but think as he lifts himself up on his arms, back arching as the sheet slides down his bare feathers and rests just above the curve of his ass. And before he knows it he’s reaching out, a small grey hand covering Falcon’s, and for a moment Mark is in awe of the sheer difference in their sizes. Falcon turns to look down and Mark almost pulls away if not for the glance Falcon gives him out of the corner of his eye. The edges of soft, jaw slack as Falcon drinks in the sight of him. Messy hair and still half asleep, Mark wonders if he looks as gross as he feels.
He doesn’t let Falcon get a response before he’s talking again. At least that was one good thing Mark was good at, talking. Talking until the person on the receiving end grows tired and annoyed. It was his downfall but right now he doesn’t care. But right now he’s nervous and his anxiety is high, so he lets himself slide this one time. “Please don't go... “ Mark says, and he hates that he sounds like a child who’s about to get scolded. He removes his hand and adverts his gaze down to the sheet, suddenly taking interest in counting the threads to see if the hotel lied about that too. “I don’t…” he wants to begin, wants to lay his heart out on the line even though there’s a high chance that Falcon will take it and rip it apart.
Sure, these nights were something tangible, hot and messy and lacking any strings. But Falcon’s gaze lingers a little too long on his lips and his thrusts start out gentler than they had been that first time in his office. And maybe Mark is just deluding himself from what all of this really is, a no strings attached; enemies with benefits situation. But Mark would be lying to himself if he told himself he didn’t want something more from this. Mark had caught feelings, something that he told himself would never happen again after his last failed relationship. You couldn’t be as rich and famous as he was and catch feelings. It was a recipe for disaster. He liked what he and Falcon had. Liked the messiness and the clandestine filter he viewed it with. Nothing more than a dependent lay with someone who knew how to fuck him right.
So why was he so desperate to have the other man stay? He knew the answer but refused to acknowledge its existence. For what? Some peace of mind that this wouldn't turn out badly for him? Falcon’s gaze softened and Mark refused to allow his heart to melt at the sight. His heart swelled and it felt as if his blood had turned to wine, thick and rich as it coursed through his body. His head growing light and flushing his face with color without his consent. And words escaping his mouth whether he wanted them to or not, “Stay.” he said, his voice sounded distant, he felt dizzy and unbalanced and he was grasping at anything that would make him sturdy once more. “Please.” his voice quieter now as he forced his gaze to anywhere but at the man looking down at him.
He let his eyes close as his breathing shallowed out, and the mattress dipped once more. Of course Falcon would leave him, and he didn’t blame him. Then suddenly there was an arm around him, eyes forced open by the unexpected touch to see Falcon laying back down on the bed with him, and he pulled him closer to him and Mark was powerless to stop himself as their chests flushed against each other like they had done all those hours ago.
“Of course.” Falcon replied, and before Mark knew it Falcon’s beak was pressed against his forehead before pulling away, the phantom kiss still pressed against his feathers and Mark refrained from lifting his hand and let his fingers graze over the spot. He would allow himself to be content, if just for this small moment in time. “Anything for you.” Falcon whispered out, hot breath ghosting through his hair that for a moment Mark wasn’t sure if the words had even been spoken. But the way Falcon’s hand traveled down the length of Mark’s body to pull him impossibly closer had him believing everything that had happened next. “Mark.” His name was spoken with such affection that Mark would forever want to stay in this perfect dream.