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“Soren?”
Ivor was beginning to lose his speed from chasing Soren for what felt like an eternity.
“Soren?”
“Soren?!”
“Soren get back here I swear to God! You’re going to get yourself killed!”
He continued running towards Soren, who was still so far yet so close. He began to pick up pace, even though it exhausted him, he couldn’t let Soren hide away in his fortress. Soren himself however didn’t turn back, desperate to run away from the chaos he created. But he could hear Ivor’s footsteps growing louder and louder before he felt his arm, and by extension himself, being pulled back. Soren turned, and saw Ivor, but he didn’t look angry like Soren had thought, he was actually more…relieved?
“Soren!” Ivor cried, “Don’t run away like that! You could've gotten injured or worse killed. God, why do you keep putting yourself in danger?” “Ivor I-” Soren tried to say. “This is so like you Soren!” Ivor snapped back, “Running away from everything and putting yourself in danger so you can just stay away from the problems you made you…you..you coward!” Soren backed up a bit from that response, only uttering, “I know! I know. I’m sorry.” He simply stood there in shame, looking away to the side. Ivor’s stern look began to soften, relaxing the grip he had on Soren’s arm. “L-look I didn’t mean it like that, I just..” Ivor sighed, “I never wanted all of this.”
Soren looked up to face Ivor, his dark eyes shining like the night sky, but also having a look of guilt in them too. “What do you mean?” Soren asked. “I didn't want any of this!” Ivor cried out to him, “I don’t know why I would risk so much to reveal the truth. And now the world could probably end because of me! My whole entire life I felt frustrated and angry with myself, and I thought that with the Order I could feel happy again. And for a few years it did.”
Soren brushed Ivor’s hair, signaling to him to continue what he was trying to say. “But when we found that…damn command block,” Ivor went on, “this feeling of guilt kept building and building, until our “fight” with the Ender Dragon…it broke me. I couldn’t deal with it anymore. I didn’t want us to be seen as heroes when we were just frauds. So my ignorance told me to make that stupid Wither, use that stupid command block, and do stupid things because if it’s all for revealing the truth that makes it ok right? I had the best intentions right? It’s not like I could possibly destroy the world right? This makes me a good person right? I’m a good person right?!”
Ivor gripped Soren’s arm once more, aggressively blinking to keep the tears from his eyes from forming. He looked desperately in Soren’s eyes, the guilt in them fully showing by now. Soren looked solemnly at Ivor back and said, “Ivor…you did nothing wrong.”
“S-Soren but I-”
“You did nothing wrong Ivor! I did!” Soren exclaimed, his hands now placed in Ivor’s shoulders, “I found the command block. I was the one who insisted on using it! And I was who made us frauds! You did nothing wrong! Sure you…made this mess b-but I should’ve known better.” Ivor looked away in shame, “Soren stop trying to make me feel better. I caused this, and now…I don’t know how I can recover from this humiliation. How any of us can.” Soren stayed silent after what Ivor said. He knew he had a point, how could they ever redeem themselves. Was that even a possibility? To be honest, he wasn’t so sure.
But then, he began to feel Ivor’s hands move to hold his, his thumb circling softly. “Your hands..” Ivor said, his tone no longer that of cold stone but rather smooth silk made by the finest strands, “They're just as warm as they were the day I left you.” Soren was taken aback but chuckled softly, blushing a light pink, “Your eyes never seemed to have lost their beauty.” Ivor immediately became flustered, using his long black hair to hide his bright red face. Soren laughed at Ivor’s embarrassment, which calmed Ivor down from the flustered mess he became. Ivor chuckled, which surprised Soren, he hasn’t heard Ivor genuinely laugh in a long time.
“You know, I missed this.” Ivor said, letting go of the strands of his hair that he held. Soren smiles, “Me too…me too. Remember when we first met, when you convinced me to leave my horrible boss?” “Of course I do, you were so nervous and wouldn’t let go of my hand!” Ivor laughed, “Remember when you made me a song for our one year anniversary? It’s still stuck in my head you know?” Soren began to beam, after years of loneliness, he felt the warmth that a relationship could bring, and who else could bring him that feeling…other than his past lover. It didn’t matter how strained their relationship was, they knew that the good memories they had with each other, with Gabriel Ellegard and Magnus, would always stay as sweet ones.
“….Remember our first kiss?”
Ivor looked up to Soren once more, eyes widened as he mentioned that, “When we finally had a successful mission as the Order?” Soren nodded, “It was in my bedroom, you and I were laughing so much together and I….I don’t know what went through me when I told you how I loved you, but I don’t regret it one bit.” Ivor smiled, “I felt like my heart was going to explode when you said that.” Soren’s voice began to wobble slightly, almost sounding like he was beginning to choke up, “And you told me back that there was nothing wrong with that and you felt just the same. And I kissed you…” Ivor rested his head on Soren’s shoulder quietly to comfort him, but Soren began to have an idea.
“Ivor.” Soren said, “Come with me.”
Ivor’s head immediately perked up in surprise, “What?”
“Let's run away together!” Soren exclaimed excitedly, “It’ll just be like the old days! You, me riding off to great adventures around the world. We wouldn’t have to worry about any of this! We can be together again!”
“But S-Soren!” Ivor replied with worry, “What about-”
“It’s going to be fine!” Soren tried to reassure, “We won’t have to worry about Jesse and his gang, the Order, the lies, or anything else! We can live in peace like we always dreamed of! It’ll be just you and me! I….” Soren's smile was beginning to fade, lowering his hands as he began to realize, it was all just wishful thinking. “…I just don’t want to be alone again.” Soren whispered. Ivor hesitated, he didn’t know what to do. He loved Soren more than anyone else in the world, and being with him for the rest of his life felt like a dream come true, but he couldn’t bring himself to run away like this, not after everything he’s done.
“Soren I-”
BOOM!
A loud noise storm in, the two quickly turned around to see what happened. The sky, it was normal again. Turning back to its beautiful blue once more from shades of purple. The smoke from the supposed explosion began to fade. And the Witherstorm, was gone?! Jesse did it, they thought. The world isn’t going to be destroyed after all! Soren turned to Ivor in excitement, and Ivor turned to him back. It was clear to him that Soren was trying to assure him that running away is the best option now that the Witherstorm is gone. But once again, Ivor knew that wasn’t an option for him. And he hated that so much.
He loved Soren. He always has. He’d almost do anything for him. All the memories he had with Soren, they were all precious. And the potential for new moments to be created felt like a dream come true. But the dangling feeling of remorse and guilt hung over him, telling him that this isn’t right, not after all the chaos he created. As much as he wanted to be with Soren, Ivor knew that there was only one right choice.
Holding back even more tears, Ivor uttered, “I…I can’t.”
“W-what do you mean?” Soren asked. “I can’t come with you Soren.” Ivor insisted, “I want to, believe me I do! But I just think that I need to redeem myself, make amends with everyone. I can’t just hide from all of this. Deep down, I think we both know that.” Soren sighed quietly, “It’s ok. You can go. If it’s your calling, I’ll respect it. As for me however…I don’t know what to do now. I suppose I’ll just continue my studies, or
write a book or two. But I’m not sure.” “Thank you,” Ivor said with a reassuring smile, but it soon started to fade once more, “So this is goodbye then?” Soren frowned once Ivor asked, “Until we meet again I’m afraid so.” Ivor looked down, his hands not wanting to let go of Soren’s, but their grip relaxing.
Then, Ivor grabbed a Blue Orchid hidden away in his inventory, and showed it to Soren, with his eyes wide in surprise. “For you,” Ivor grinned, “To remember me.” Soren immediately placed his hand onto his chest, taken aback by the kind gesture. “Oh my,” Soren said breathlessly, his stomach fluttering like butterflies flying through a field of flowers, “I..I don’t know what to say. Thank you! Here!” Soren immediately grabbed a Azure bluet and immediately showed it to Ivor, making him blush a deep scarlet red at the sight of the flower. “I kept this flower when I was adventuring once, it..reminded me of you.”
Ivor had never felt so touched by the gestures of a man in so long. He felt his hand touch his face to try and calm his rapid heartbeat down. The guilt, the frustration, the anger, it all was gone now. Ivor couldn’t help but smile at Soren, he truly did miss his lover, and now he could finally admit to himself that he never lost love for him even after all this time. But he felt that begin to seep in, it wasn’t anything bad, nor was it good. It was…bittersweet. It was the feeling of joy of finally being with his lover after so long, then finally being able to reconcile. But it was also the feeling of sadness, knowing that this could possibly be the last time he’ll ever see Soren, the feelings of joy being just there to delay the inevitable. Bittersweet. That was the word.
“Ivor, are you alright?”
Ivor looked up to Soren once more, noticing a look of concern in Soren’s dark brown eyes. It took him a while to realize that Soren probably noticed his watering eyes despite his smiling. Ivor wipe them away with his arm as he nodded to him, assuring that this was fine. It was all fine. “I’m not gonna let myself cry am I?” Ivor chuckled to try to lighten his mood, yet failed to do so.
Silence. And then,
“Goodbye Ivor.”
Ivor noticed that Soren was in tears by now, and could only reply, “Goodbye Soren.” He smiled at him, and Soren smiled back, both of them knowing that this could possibly be the last moment they have with each other.
“I’ll see you again one day…right?” Ivor asked, slightly showing vulnerability in his voice. “Oh course,” Soren replied with a breathless, bittersweet smile. Ivor nodded as he began to walk away, his hand almost letting go of his lover’s only for Soren to call out to him.
“Wait!”
Ivor turned once more, “What is it?”
“…Kiss me goodbye.”
Ivor’s eyes widened as his face began to blush, and that moment immediately broke him. He began to have tears form in his usually stern eyes, now becoming ones of someone truly touched by the words of the lover he once knew dearly, as he only uttered in response, “…oh Soren.”
Ivor rushed into Soren’s arms once again as they grabbed each other’s hips to bring them closer together. Soren then cupped Ivor’s face with his other hand, before quickly kissing him softly. Ivor responded just as swiftly as he kissed back passionately, pulling Soren’s hair with one hand and his other hand on his back. They continued to kiss each other intimately, refusing to let go for what felt like hours but was actually just a few short moments. Whispering each other’s names in between kisses. Simply wanting this moment to last forever, they were practically begging to feel the warmth of their love for each other that they’ve missed for so long. Not having a single care about the world around them, they just had each other, and that’s all that mattered.
But it wasn’t meant to last. Eventually, Ivor felt Soren breaking the kiss, the warmth of Soren’s arms fading away. And when he opened his eyes, Soren was already gone. And all that was left of that one glorious moment, was Ivor standing in front of where his lover once stood, his tears of joy becoming tears of sadness all over again.
Sobbing, Ivor turned back and began to walk away, with the words of Soren haunting his head.
“You did nothing wrong Ivor,”
“You did nothing wrong Ivor,”
“You did nothing wrong Ivor,”
And Ivor simply just muttered to himself,
“Did I really?”