Chapter Text
Darkness.
That's what Sizhui met as he opened his eyes. He couldn't make out the shape of anything. What time was it really? He didn't remember sleeping. Last time he was attending a conference at Koi Tower and was looking forward to meeting Jin Ling. The letters he received prior to that stated that Jin Ling was nervous. It had been five years since he was leading the Jin sect but it was his first time to officiate a cultivation conference. Sizhui wanted to be there for him so badly and now he was just here... sleeping?
As some more fog lifted off from his mind, he felt the unremarkable softness of the mattress beneath him, similar to his guest quarters in Koi Tower. Was he sick? He felt perfectly fine even then. This was perplexing. As he tried to lift his arm to rub his eyes he became more aware of his surroundings. He couldn't. His hands were bound to something over his head. The lower body wasn't mobile either! Instinctively his eyes widened and he tried to blink faster. No! The room wasn't dark. A cloth was obscuring his vision. How?
Sizhui tugged at the binds but in vain. His spiritual energy was apparently drained too. He remembered Jin Ling casually mentioning assassination attempts on his life and other Lanling Jin propagandas. But why would someone choose this occasion? The whole cultivation world was present. How was that even possible? Last thing he remembered, he was with his sect leader and other Lan disciples just outside the main hall. No matter how hard he tried, nothing made sense- the captor, the motive or why they chose him.
Honed from many nighthunts his non-visual senses were instantly on high alert. His panicking struggle came to an abrupt halt when a door opened somewhere. From the slightly audible distance between him and the sound of footsteps he discerned it could be any room in Koi tower. The opulence was same everywhere. As the sounds became more audible his ears picked another detail. It was a single person who entered the room. The aura was neither friendly nor did it has any killing intent. Maybe a subordinate who was tasked to keep a watch on him.
But then the distance between them decreased and Sizhui couldn't be more sure of the identity of his cap- saviour! Afterall he had relied on those footfalls during many Night Hunts.
"Jin Ling." He sighed in relief with a voice hoarse from lack of usage but loud enough that he was surprised himself. It must have taken some time for Jin Ling to find him.
The footsteps faltered imperceptibly but Sizhui sensed it in the otherwise still room and he didn't like it for some unknown reason.
"It's sect leader Jin for you."
Sizhui's eyes widened beneath the blindfolds. The voice was familiar yet it snatched away any consolation he gained for a short time. His smile, which was there habitually, vanished as fast as it appeared. It was Jin Ling himself who asked him not to use any honorifics. Then, why now? Once by mistake he had even called him 'A-Ling' but Jin Ling didn't mind a bit, if the opposite was true Sizhui didn't dare to hope.
Whatever this whole situation was implying, Sizhui wanted to deny it wholeheartedly. But he was raised a rational thinker and even his intuitions were screaming that it was threatening. The bed by his side dipped and he felt the cold gaze on himself. How could this person be the same as the Jin Ling he knew? The same one who comforted him that his lineage wouldn't change their relationship in any way and even proved it in the later years.
Something wet slid down his temples- his own silent tears flowing involuntarily and his whole body shuddered. The only reprieve was to think that it's a nightmare but it all felt too real and he hadn't the strength to hope against hopes. Anyone else in his situation might have screamed, struggled or pleaded but he didn't. If this was reality, what was the purpose of living in it?
A liquid was poured in a cup somewhere near his head. The cold calloused fingers that tapped his cheek were imprinted in his memory from casual touches. He could easily fathom the pattern if they were placed anywhere else on his body. "Open," The voice was low and emotionless. Sizhui's lips trembled with a sob.
"I said open your damn mouth!"
The volume increased as fingers dug around his mouth fiercely. Sizhui knew Jin Ling was impatient but it was his first time experiencing it. The pain was enough to pull him out of his worst nightmares. Every fibre of hope, if present, left his limp body as the contents were forcefully poured into his mouth. He was too numb to taste anything so it took him a moment to realise that it was just plain water dribbling down his parched throat.
He sensed the physical warmth leaving his side.
"Why?" Sizhui didn't remember the last time he sounded so vulnerable.
Receding footsteps echoed in the empty room. After everything, wasn't he worthy of at least an explanation?
"Tomorrow, is your trial." Was all he got as signs of Jin Ling's presence faded away.
Trial?! For what? The only thing he ever felt extremely guilty for was his bloodline which wasn't even in his control. At some point he wished that he could change it, what with everything associated with his family name. Then wasn't it Jin Ling who taught him not to blame himself and promised to stand by his side if anyone dared to say otherwise. Will the trial change anything? Jin Ling's indifference was already choking him to death. What other punishments could they announce?
Sizhui's incessant sobs demanded answers which the empty room couldn't provide. He didn't know what to expect from others. He sure had faith in his adopted parents but where were they when he needed them? He wanted to curl into himself but his predicament wouldn't allow it.
He could scream for help, someone might come. Afterall, he was loved by many. Yet he didn't. At some point, the weeping stopped as he drifted back into sleep once again.