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10 Times Four Appreciated Tris
1 Tris stands in front of target
Four is not a member of the Stiff's fan club, ok? He's just not... Despite the fact that she's the first Abnegation member to switch to Dauntless since.. Well, since himself. He's not particularly impressed at how much attention she’s drawn to herself. She’s a natural at this Dauntless business, but he's already set the precedence for Abnegation transfers and what she's doing now is just following in his footsteps.Still, there is something special about her.. Already she has gained the title of First Jumper. Already she has shown a surprising amount of determination and effort. Already she has proven herself to be a fast learner, a good shot, and right now she is proving herself to be an uncannily accurate knife-thrower. She hits the centre of her target three times in a row, first try. Four has to restrain himself from gaping.
She has also proven herself to be an absolute idiot. Right now, she is doing something unbelievably stupid. She’s trying to protect her friend from Eric.
Four stares Eric down when he asks for assistance in bullying an initiate. He’s about to decline, but then he remembers how shitty Eric’s aim is. Despite his dislike for the cowardly giant of a boy, Al if he remembers correct, he doesn’t want to have to accept the tedious task of scrubbing his blood off the target. So he prepares himself for the stupid task of throwing knives at a boy who will no doubt flinch and be thrown out and cause a shitload of paper work on Four’s behalf. But then the Stiff speaks up, her voice clear in the loud acoustics of the training hall.
“Stop”, she says. Shit. Eric turns to her, his face contorted into a cruel smirk. “Anyone can stand in front of a target, it doesn’t prove anything”. Her tone is hard, her words firm and her large eyes hold Eric’s calculating stare. God, she’s a moron. A stupid stupid stupid idiotic moron. Eric tells her to take Al’s place, just like Four knew he would and Four is relieved and annoyed to see her obey with little hesitation.
Now he has to be extra careful. It wouldn’t do, for him, an ex-abnegation member, son of Marcus Eaton, to kill the daughter of an Abnegation council member. The rule ‘faction before blood’ only went so far and the short girl standing in front of the glowing blue target in front of him was still someone with influence. He couldn’t care less if she were to drop dead right this second on her own accord. But he doesn’t want her death to cause him inconvenience.. That’s it.. He has to be careful not to ruin her pretty face… So that he doesn’t get in trouble with the Dauntless leaders. Not because he remembers how beautiful she had looked wild-eyed and wind-struck that day when he had pulled her off the net. Nothing to do with that at all...
2 Tris makes out with him
Tris’s lips are rough. He didn’t expect that. He expected them to be soft, giving, like the rest of her. He didn’t expect them to be chapped and dry and wet and as fucking hot as they are. He wants to touch her but he’s smart enough to understand when she traps his hands in hers. He did use to be a stiff too, afterall. She’s not his first kiss, not by far, but he’s hers. So he keeps it all above the waist and when she smiles into his mouth and bites his lower lip, he resists the urge to pull his hands out of her grip to grope at her (amazing) ass.
Her eyelashes brush against his cheek. They’re abnormally long. He would assume they’re fake if Tris was the kind of girl who even knew fake lashes existed. He doubts that though, so either her friends glued them onto her and she didn’t notice, or she just has really good genetics.
Four’s not quite sure why he’s thinking about that when by right his brain should not be functioning at all. Tris mouths at his neck, her lips firm and warm, her tongue swiping against his pulse, and he loses his train of thought. Then she bites down on his ear and he loses the capability to think at all.
.
3 Tris saves his ass from Eric
He’s about to die. He knows Eric, he knows Eric holds no sentiment towards him, only anger and jealousy. He knows that he’s surrounded by fully-aware combat-capable Dauntless leaders. He knows that now that the gun’s pressed against his head and Eric’s finger is on the trigger, there’s nothing he can do, no last-ditch effort capable of saving him. He wants to close his eyes. Maybe conjure up an image of his friends, or his mum, or Tris. One last good memory before he goes.
“Say bye-bye asshole” See you in hell, dick.
“Bye-bye asshole” Wait what?
Then Tris is in front of him, moving as fluidly as a dance, her hair swirling around her in a golden arc and her large eyes narrowed in determination. Hot damn.. Is the only thought that is running through his mind at that moment because Tris wears violence like a deep-red curve-hugging dress, that is to say, violence, on her, is sexy. But that moment of revelation only lasts a second before he’s being forced to move again, smashing his elbow into the face of a Dauntless leader and dealing out his fair amount of concussions.
4 Tris cuts her hair
Four really, really likes Tris’s hair. It’s beautiful and eye catching, no matter what the lighting is. In the sunlight, it’s a golden colour, like wheat or metal. And it’s smooth and thick, falling straight down between her shoulder blades, reflecting the light and flowing against her lean limbs. So when she cuts that beautiful mass of dappled yellow and woven gold off, he has a hard time learning to appreciate the way that this new haircut draws attention to her admittedly very cute face. And her hair is still beautiful. Still the same colour, just a lot shorter. She looks more boyish now. He realises her face is quite round, and her lashes are still ridiculously long. Her face used to have a softness to it. Her long hair.. Used to make her seem.. vain? Or extravagant, a soft teenage girl playing war. Now she looks dangerous, hard, hot. Like a girl that belongs in the middle of all action. And she admits that she now stores a knife in the place where she used to carry a comb.
5 Tris attacks Peter
Four stares at the stare down happening between Tris and Peter. He didn’t hear what Peter said, but he’s seen that look on Tris’s face before. He can feel her anger waves filling up the air between them. He knows exactly what happens when her jaw sets like that. What happens next, he saw coming from a mile off.
Now any other day, or place for that matter, Four would be all for punching Peter in his stupid stupid face. But right now, they’re in the middle of a hall full of people who believe that Peace, is the most important quality of all. Starting a fight right now would be a Really Bad Idea.
Don’t do it, don’t do it, please sweet holy mother Tris, be smart, DON’T FUCKING DO IT.
Despite Four’s most desperate attempts at telepathy, Tris still does it. She flips the table over, somehow vaults over it in the same second and before Four can even blink, she’s straddling Peter one hand fisted in his hair, pulling his head back against the grass, the other pressing a butter knife to his throat. Four kind of wants to whistle, or cheer, or just point out very loudly that that super hot, dangerous, amazing fire cracker is his girlfriend. He really knows how to pick’em.
6 Tris admits to killing Will
Four has to fight against the tears threatening to spill over his own cheeks.. That would kind of ruin the whole ‘macho tough guy’ thing he has going on. But Tris had looked so vulnerable. She had been in so much pain. And she had lied to him. They had promised, no more secrets. Sure he had kept a lot from her, but that was before the ‘no more secrets’ deal. She had killed her friend, even Four had never done something like that, and she still hadn’t forgiven herself. She was carrying so much weight on her slender shoulders and Four just wanted to hug her. To help her. To pull all of that weight off her, even if he had to shoulder it himself. He shouldn’t have forced her to do it. There must have been another choice.. He could’ve.. Broken them out or something. Not put Tris through that much pain. She had practically been choking on her words. The memory makes Four cringe.
7 Tris leaves for Erudite
He knew she was going to go. He already knew. So why was he so damn hurt by the fact that she had chosen to save a few random Dauntless’s lives over stay with him?. He understood that her selflessness was one of the reasons he loved her, but couldn’t she see that he needed her. He didn’t think he could live without her anymore. She was like a breath of fresh air. She was his drug. She was the only motivation he had left in this stupid hopeless world and he would do anything and everything for her. Except give her up.
He kicks a crate in anger. He needs to come up with a rescue plan and he needs to do it fast. He wants to do the Dauntless thing, it’s screaming in his blood. He wants to charge the Erudite compound and fucking fuck whoever tries to get in his way, but the memory of that night all those days ago restrains him.
“I don’t want to be just one thing. I want to be brave and smart and selfless and honest and kind”
Right now he needs to be smart. He just hopes Tris will keep herself alive.
8 Tris fake dies
He sees them come in, wheeling the covered body. His heart skips a beat.
Then two.
Then three.
Then Peter pulls back the cover and he finds that his heart restarts with a jolt and along with it comes an overwhelming sense of pain. It hurts worse than it did that time he stood at the top of the zipline building. He remembers that day, the wind whistling through his ears and the anxious thump thump thump of his heart when he had peered over the edge of the building. He had ziplined, but he had kept his eyes closed for most of it and had thrown up afterwards. The familiar sense of nausea wells up in his gut and he has to forcibly pull himself out of it. Now is not the time.
He shelves his pain as well as he can and when Peter opens his door, he finds that his heart is now beating in anger, like a war drum. He shoves Peter up against the wall, ready to break his fucking face. Peter’s nose is crooked and Four has a pretty good idea who caused it. He’s going to break Peter’s nose again, as a tribute to Tris. Peter will always have to remember the girl he killed when he sees himself in the mirror. A cruel sadistic part of himself, deep inside, purrs with pleasure. Fitting it hisses.
He’s about to do it, his fist is reared back and his muscles are all tensed, but then he hears a cough and a familiar splutter behind him and his already overworked heart starts beating a new pattern. Something that speaks of hope and anticipation. He turns and it takes him a couple of seconds to allow himself to believe his eyes. Tris smiles at him weakly and Four thinks that he may just be on the brink of a heart attack.
9 Tris gets the message
Tris holds his hand as the screens across the city light up with that strange woman’s face. He can barely believe it, there’s a world out there waiting for them. They’re the divergents, and they’re going to save the world.
10 Tris dies
One Two Three Four
Tris is gone. Gone. One tear, then another then another. Tris, Tris, Tris. She’s gone.. For real this time. He can’t. He doesn’t understand, still doesn’t understand. He loves her. But she’s gone. He chokes on a sob. She’s not here anymore. He’ll never see the cute scrunch of her nose again. Never see her roll her eyes. Never see her exhilarated smile. Never see her smooth body in fast action, never fight with her side by side. He’ll never see that familiar golden head beside him ducking under punches and lashing out viciously at whatever poor soul picked a fight with her. She’ll never beat up a man twice her size again. She’ll never beat a man twice her size again. Tris, beautiful, vicious, dangerous, dauntless-prodigy Tris will never get to throw another punch.
It’s that thought that finally breaks Four. His tears start to run freely and he stops holding back his sobs, his whole body shakes with their force. He curls in on himself. It’s like his heart is being stabbed repeatedly with a rusty knife. Again and again and again. He can’t breath around the pain. It hurts so bad. He’s gasping now and clawing at his chest, loud ugly choking noises coming from his throat. Tris never cried like this. When Tris cried, she made these cute whining sounds. Squeaks of pain, her bottom lip trembling and her large eyes squinting. Tris only cried with her upper body, controlled racks making it’s way up her spine. But now her spine is ash and all he has is memories. So many memories, but not enough. He wants her back.
He cries it like a petulant child. I want her back! I want her back! I WANT HER BACK! He screams it out loud in the confines of his room. Then he rolls over again and cries some more.
It’s not fair. It shouldn’t have been Tris. It should have been Caleb. Or Peter. Or him. Not Tris. Never Tris. Tris deserved to live a long, happy, dangerous and exhilarating life.
“The brightest lights always burn out the quickest” That’s what his mother says to him, patting his hand and stroking his hair sympathetically. She says it again at the funeral, her voice cracking up and mascara running down her cheeks in the perfect show of sorrow. His mother is a great actress, a great liar, just like Tris was, and Four finds that he hates her for it.
“At least her death meant something” his father says. “She died fighting for a great cause, and it is due to her sacrifice that we are all able to gather here, outside the wall, with no more poverty stricken or power hungry fools today”. Surprisingly Four isn’t the one to punch his father in the nose for that, Christina is. No one complains.
“Tris died young and beautiful and protecting the people she loved most. That’s the best anyone could ask for” that’s what Caleb says on the podium. “She would have been happy if she knew, before hand, that this is how she was going to- to pass on”. Caleb’s eyes are red but Four holds no sympathy towards him. Caleb betrayed Tris, how dare he try to pretend that he loved her?
Christina stands on the podium, her eyes red rimmed. She’s wearing grey and black. A combination of Dauntless and Abnegation in honour of Tris and her fists are clenched in the dark fabric of her skirt. “Tris- Tris was my best friend. She was brave and kind and smart and a really, really good liar. She- She wasn’t perfect. She made many mistakes, she killed my boyfriend! For god’s sake. But she was just a kid, like me, like all of the Initiates who have been forced to kill over and over again over the past month. I miss her, and I hope that, wherever she is, she’s happy”. A polite round of applause, and then it’s.. Peter's turn?
"What the fuck" Four hisses under his breath. Next to him, he hears Tori hiss the exact same thing. Whoever decided to let Peter give a eulogy for Tris needs to quit their day job. He can already see Christina stomping her way towards the podium, cracking her fists with her face set in grim determination. Peter, evidently sees her too because he wastes no time stooping a little to press his lips against the mike before peering up from beneath his lashes, his grin a manic and evil thing. "Hello ladies.. Gentlemen.. So.. While you've all been singing praises about the Stiff, I'm gonna switch things up a bit and tell you for a fact that the Stiff was a BITCH." A mutter of discontentment ripples through the crowd. Peter just grins. "Yeah, that's right.. That bitch shot me a couple of times, and she broke my nose too once.. She even tried to stab me with a BUTTER knife.." Christina is stomping up the podium steps by now. Peter risks a quick glance at her before finishing his speech. "But apart from that we were pretty good friends.." Four can't help but snort at that. Peter hops of the side of the podium before Christina can grab at him, he runs off and someone else quickly takes his place on the podium. Four wonders if they'll cut Peter out of the official video, before he remembers that he doesn't care.
When it comes to Four’s turn, Four can barely drag himself to the stage. He doesn’t know what to say, he hasn’t prepared anything. He wants to talk about her life, her spirit. He wants to talk about how she combined selflessness with bravery and created a new quality, entirely unique to her. He wants to talk about her love of heights, about her obsession with chocolate cake, about how despite her fears, despite the fact that she was dangerous and deadly, she was still always so humble, her self-esteem so low. She thought of herself as a monster, and Four regrets not being able to change that.
When he gets to the podium, a hush falls over all grievers gathered. There are hundreds of people, thousands, gathered to say farewell to their saviour, to the Divergent girl who changed the world. What Four says now will be recorded, displayed on the large screens of the city. His words will be watched by every child out there who goes to school in this century at least. Already, history books are being written about him and Tris. The tragic love story and the heartbreaking sacrifice. He needs to choose his words carefully, he needs to do Tris justice.
He starts off quietly. “Tris was beautiful in a way no picture, no drawing could capture. She was selfless. She couldn’t see it, because her selflessness was different from the Abnegation. Her selflessness was carried easily, naturally, not like a burden that she had to inflict upon herself.” Four doesn’t know where these pretty words are all coming from. They’re true.. But they don’t seem right. He tries again, his voice stronger this time. “She deserved, to live! She deserved to be happy and grow up and see the world that she fought so hard for-”. His speech still sounds wrong.
He shakes his head empathetically, agitated…”I loved her. I loved her so much. I loved how she was brave. I love how she was smart. I love how vicious she was in a fight. How she threw herself into everything with so much determination and courage and-” Four really hates himself. His speech is so.. So cliche’. It’s not special enough, it’s not good enough for the uniqueness of Tris’s character. He decides to try one more time.
“Tris was the bravest of us all. When she first came to the Dauntless compound, as an initiate, she was weak and skinny. She was too modest and too innocent and too sensitive. She jumped first, not out of bravery, but out of wounded pride But as the weeks went by, she improved at an alarming rate. She had so much potential, so many choices. She could have been anything she wanted, and she knows that, but she chose Dauntless. She chose bravery over everything else. It takes a special kind of person to choose the life of jumping trains and brutal workouts, but she chose it and she excelled at it, and she became it. She was bravery. Pure bravery. You could see it in every action. How much courage she needed just to wake up each day.. She was a goddess. There was goodness in every aspect of her, intelligence lined every cell, bravery ran through her veins like blood, her bones were light with selflessness and she always, always did the best she could do."
Four can't go on. He doesn't know what else there is to say. I wish she were still here? That's not really true.. In all honesty he wishes that he was the one with her. But she would never forgive him if she heard him say that. Goddammit, He can see hundreds of faces staring up at him expectantly,he needs to give some kind of closing to his speech.. But he can't think of anything. He falls back on an old defense and turns on his 'scary face' as Tris had called it. He nods once at the audience and pulls a sort-of grimace before walking down the steps from the podium. He walks past the line of people waiting to give their own speeches. He walks past the concerned stare of Christina and the faint indifference of his father and the open arms of his mother. He walks and walks and in the distance he sees a raven flitting around the treetops. Tris he thinks, then he runs.