Archive of Our Own

Chapter Text

Jake’s entire life has been a game of darts.
He’s hit the target a million times, mind always focused on bright red lines and dots, flawless marksmanship and a heart that only flutters at the sight of victory.
He’s also missed some few, chest clenching in pain, unbridled rage and frustration creeping up his throat like poisonous acid, he hates losing and he hates missing, he hates not being number one more than anything in the world.
An ace in every subject under the sun- a valedictorian and an amazing sports adept, Jake’s used to never missing and he prides himself in his exceptionally clean record, for someone as witty and giving as him, it was only natural he’d become a lawyer, graduate from the most prestigious law school and work for the most prestigious law firm- in a world where everything is black and white, Jake knows the trick and he knows how to make it cater to him.

He chose to become a lawyer because his father and his father’s father and his father’s father’s father had built up a century’s worth of reputation for the Sim men, all powerful and good-looking, successful attorneys, it only made sense to him, he’d never thought even for a second that perhaps the field wasn’t for him.
That is, until his first trial.
He wore his best suit, hair slicked back and a golden bracelet framing the nervous shaking of his hands- the trial was for a young foreign boy that’d gotten caught up in the murder case of one of his high school classmates, the firm only assigned such an inexperienced attorney to the case because he was foreign as well, he’d struggled building a story with his client and even on the day of the trial he still had doubts about his innocence; nonetheless, the day he showed up to the courtroom he was the most nervous he’d been in his entire life- Jake never misses, it’s unlike him to lose, it’s unlike him to doubt himself, but the hostile environment around him was enough for a newfound insecurity to kick in.

The jury was made up of elderly women that gazed at his client like he was another species, while the judge himself gawked at the kid with bright blonde hair, speaking in a slow manner as if he wouldn’t understand the language otherwise.
His hands gripped the handle of his own briefcase to the point the design of the faux leather engraved onto his skin, sweaty palms struggling to hold it properly as the judge announced the arrival of the prosecutor- Seoul’s most relentless and cold attorney, a man that’d put a number of people in jail higher than Jake’s own age.

Sunghoon was remarkably young for his title, and he’d worked for his reputation as a monster in the courtroom, he’d chew up young and inexperienced attorneys like Jake and spit them out like pudding, he worked his hardest for that guilty verdict and Jake despised him more than anyone else in that courtroom for it- in his eyes, Sunghoon’s blind chase for punishment was selfish and unfair and didn’t archive anything other than ruining young boys’ lives.
Sunghoon was taller and older and smarter and bigger than him in every way possible, he could already feel his client sulking when the two met and Jake sloppily waved at him amidst the silence of the courtroom, the man barely gave him the benefit of a stare, when their eyes met all he could think about was how terribly minuscule he was in that courtroom, how insignificant every word he said in their presence was; Riki, the high school boy sitting in the defendant’s chair coughed dry and nudged him with his elbow, calling his attention as if to stop him from embarrassing himself any further and all Jake could do was sulk and sit back, heart drumming loudly in his chest.

The gavel came down and he embarrassingly jumped at the sound, startled, everyone’s eyes on him for a second as the courtroom went silent. ”The prosecution may call the first witness.” The judge said, and Sunghoon fidgeted ever so gracefully and brought in a boy every bit as young as the one sitting next to Jake. “Please state your name and occupation” He said, making the boy in the stand stumble on himself trying to reach the microphone, looking directly at Sunghoon like he was trying to impress him.
“M-my name’s, uh… Kim-Kim Sunoo, yeah, I’m Kim Sunoo.” He stuttered and shook in the stand, the prosecutor visibly unimpressed as he spoke again, “Occupation.”
“Oh! R-Right, I’m, uh… I’m a student at Hanlim, I’m in my third year and, um… I also work at a coffee shop part time- like on Wednesdays and Thursdays and Saturdays and I get paid minimum wage but Mr. Park said I shouldn’t talk about that part so forget everything I said- but don’t forget the, uh, the student part I am a student, and I also work there, I didn’t lie or anything but I-I, yeah…” Sunoo’s nerve-wracking demeanor served as a sedative for Jake, the boy fidgeting and scarcely trying to please the prosecutor as he seemed to be nursing the most childish crush on him- the whole court could see it, and there was only so much he could hide behind that round smile and flaming cheeks.

“Please tell the court about the events that took place between 11:45 and 12:30 on the third of November of the present year.” Sunghoon showed no mercy as he dryly questioned the kid, throwing big words around like either of them knew what they meant- surely he knew what they meant, Sunghoon struck him like the kind of man to read up a dictionary just for the sake of making others feel small.
Sunoo sputtered, sneaking glances at his sweaty palm with messy pen writing on it, “Uh, I was at school the entire morning but my tummy ached so I called my dad to pick me up, while I was waiting at the infirmary at school I saw Riki, the, uh- the boy over there walk in with his uniform all splashed in, like, red paint, he was holding the blazer and it was dripping too- Later when my dad picked me up there were police people and an ambulance at school picking up some other kid, they said he got, uh, stabbed or something.” Now, Jake’s read every page in his attorney’s handbook, he’s looked over the evidence of this case a million times and he’s memorized the timeline by heart- a testimony in a case with lots of evidence makes little impact, but this time, Sunoo was the only one that’d seen Riki the day of the murder before he was arrested on the scene, and even though the kid swore to him he didn’t do it, it was a painfully solid testimony and Sunghoon was a painfully witty lawyer.

“May you please tell the court what you know of the victim and the defendant.” Sunoo glanced over at Riki with pity in his eyes, he didn’t seem like a bad kid and Jake knew he didn’t have the intention of sending his classmate to juvenile or prison, but with the pressure of a prosecutor behind him, the boy was probably told what to say. “Um, Riki was new to the school- they were both two years behind me, I can’t remember the guy’s name but he was pretty mean to Riki and him and his friends picked on him a lot, the day before the stabbing Riki got teased in the cafeteria for his lunch and they got into a fight, the other guy got suspended.”
Sunghoon straightened up in his stand, sharp eyes looking Jake’s way and he gulped in anticipation of what he was about to say, “Your honor, the witness’ testimony fully matches the evidence and places the defendant in the scene at the time of the murder, he’s also given a motive for the crime and a connection to the victim, I see no need for the defense to cross-examine him.”

Jake shot up immediately as he heard him, eyes moving quickly between Sunghoon and the judge, sweating profusely as his hand nervously gripped Riki’s shoulder, he was going to cry- his first trial was ending in under five minutes at the hands of a high school kid that wrote keywords on his own hands. "Objection overruled, since it’s Mr.Sim’s first trial it’s essential to let him continue the cross-examination.” His heart stopped beating for a second, looking back at Sunghoon like he was afraid to have made him upset, though immediately Riki pulled him back to earth as he pinched his arm, “Please cross-examine the witness, Mr. Sim.”
Sunoo’s testimony had been so messy he had a hard time picking it apart, everything was wrong and he couldn’t spend the rest of the trial pointing out every mistake from the lack of clarity about the time frame to the obvious manipulation from the prosecution to make it as vague as possible, nonetheless, someone had to help Riki defend himself. “There- there’s this part of the testimony, um, Mr. Kim said the victim was suspended from school the day before, what was he doing in school the day of the murder?”

Sunoo fidgeted with his hands, uneasy, “Well, I’m not really sure, he was hanging out with his friends, since it’s almost winter break…” He didn’t want to be mean to a kid, but there was no way he’d let an innocent high school boy go to prison for murder, he wouldn’t lose even if it meant badgering Sunghoon’s witness till he broke. “So you don’t know the victim’s name nor what he was doing in school the day of the murder, correct?”
“Yeah-yeah, I don’t”

“Will you please tell us what proof you have that, despite being covered in blood at the scene, Mr. Nishimura was the one to stab Mr. Kim?” Sunghoon immediately raised an objection as Sunoo’s mouth sat open to respond. “Your honor, the prosecution would like to submit the murder weapon with the defendant’s fingerprints as evidence.” And Jake felt so good raising his own objection, smile crawling into his lips as he spoke. “Your honour, the murder weapon was originally one of the defendant’s belongings, the fingerprints are irrelevant to the case.” The judge called for the evidence to be presented for the jury, a bright red pocket knife heavily stained with blood and marked with black pen on the side where it read: ‘Riki’s’.
“Has the witness, Kim Sunoo, ever seen the defendant wielding this knife?” Jake asked, chest tightening as he noticed how small the boy became in the stand- it truly didn’t strike him as the testimony of someone with ulterior motives, but Sunoo’s story needed to be cracked open and dissected until it didn’t mean anything. “Uh, no-no, I’ve never seen that knife until today.” he muttered, fidgeting with his hands as he glanced at Sunghoon like he expected to be saved from the examination- Jake didn’t like being like this to a kid. “Your honor, the witness’ testimony is faulty and vague, far too vague to declare a verdict solely based on it.” Immediately, Sunghoon stood from his seat, raising an objection and pulling on the string tied around Jake’s neck. “The witness is underaged and has just beheld a heinous crime, your honor, the defense is being far too aggressive with the cross-examination.”

The judge glanced over at a red-ear Sunoo and sighed, “Objection sustained, Mr. Sim may not follow this line of questioning any longer" His stomach started twisting in unease, Sunoo was about to break and with so much evidence against Riki he could only hope the kid would be tried as a minor, his head was starting to pound and the shaking of his hands had gotten so bad it was evident- he’d never felt this way, so helpless and insecure, especially now that he was carrying someone’s future on his back. “Uh- well, please tell the court about- uh- did you, perhaps, talk to the defendant when you met him on the day of the murder?”
Sunoo fidgeted in his seat, still nervous and unsure what to say. “Uh, yeah, actually I did, he was all bummed out about something so I asked what was wrong and he told me not to go in the dressing rooms- it was pretty weird.” Sunghoon smiled like he already knew he’d ask about this, “The dressing rooms are where the murder took place, which not only places suspicion on the defendant but also goes to show he knew about the incident shortly after it took place.”

The room started closing in on him- Was Riki really innocent? If he wasn’t, he didn’t even blame him for it, the kid was relentlessly bullied every day since he came from Japan, for him to get revenge like this wasn’t rare and much less unexpected, but Jake couldn’t simply lose his first trial- especially not after a mere ten minutes of it starting. “The- uh- the defense would like to call Nishimura Riki to the stand.” And even the judge seemed surprised, it was like everyone knew he was making a bad choice except for him.
Riki stood awkwardly and the entire courtroom watched as Sunoo gave him a sad smile, motioning with his hands for him to do well- Jake’s sweat turned so cold he felt like he’d freeze, shaking and on the verge of shedding tears.
As soon as Riki took the stand the jury gave him the stink eye, the boy was wearing a shirt and jeans to court because he had nothing else to wear, blonde hair with pitch black roots growing in and a trembling to his voice that could only belong to a child his age, Jake thought maybe his innocent demeanor would help clean his image to the public, though, it didn’t seem like he was anything but a delinquent.

“May the defendant tell the court about the events that took place between 11:45 and 12:30 on the third of November of the present year” Sunghoon recited like a monologue, Jake bracing himself for the same heartbreaking testimony he heard a few days back, for Riki’s small voice to tell a story he shouldn’t have to. “I-uh, well, it was like fourth period and I- I had gym class, usually I don’t change in the locker rooms because if I do people take my clothes… I changed for gym class in the bathroom and put my clothes in my backpack, but as I was putting away my blazer one of my classmates- uh, Mr. Kim splashed me with red paint from the janitor’s office, my gym clothes got drenched so I changed back to my uniform and went to the nurse’s office with my blazer to see if she had something that could help, when I came back out the police caught me and took me in for questioning.” Sunghoon’s eyes were sharp on him and Jake felt sobad for the kid, even he struggled holding eye contact with the prosecutor.
“Mr. Nishimura, you claim to have been in the nurse’s office at the time of the murder, so why did the previous witness say you warned him not to go to the scene?” And Riki looked painfully nervous at this, Jake could tell even when he told this story to him that there was something he wasn’t telling. “I- because I got splashed with paint! Obviously I didn’t want him to get splashed too…” And Sunghoon smiled like he already caught him right where he wanted. “But you knew very well why Mr. Kim splashed you with paint, didn’t you? This wasn’t a spontaneous practical joke on whoever was at the dressing rooms, you were targeted specifically and you knew that very well, correct?”

“We-well I didn’t really-” And Sunghoon immediately started talking again, terrorizing the poor kid even more. “He’s been picking on you for months… Stealing your stuff, hitting you, stealing your lunch money, calling you names, you were tired of it, weren’t you? Tired of being his punching bag, you wanted to give him what he deserved.” Both Jake and Riki froze, Riki’s eyes welling up in tears just at his words. “I’m not a killer! Of course I was tired but I’d never do that to anyone!” The prosecutor didn’t even flinch at his tone, looking as stern as always as he spoke. “Perhaps you’re not a killer, perhaps you only meant to give him a scare, perhaps you lost control once the first stab went in and acted on impulse, that’s why you were covered in blood at the nurse’s office, that’s why you told Kim Sunoo to stay away from the scene, you were trying to protect him from seeing the horrible thing you did!”
Jake’s heart started thumping as he watched Riki wipe at his tears with his forearm, speechless and trying to mutter out a response, his sweat turned cold and hands started shaking even more violently, lips moving impulsively and without a second thought. “Your honor, I would like to request a short five-five minute break, please.”

Everyone in the court was immediately taken aback by the request, Sunghoon shooting him a glare from across the courtroom with his brows furrowed, yet, the judge’s gaze immediately softened at him, bringing down the gravel to get the attention of the court. “We’ll be taking a five minute recess, the verdict will be announced when we come back. The court is adjourned.” And without even thinking of Riki, Jake dashed out the courtroom with trembling legs, leaping into the floor bathroom and finding the first vacant booth to empty out his stomach, it was the first time in his life he’d ever thrown up from pure nervousness, he felt so terribly embarrassed sitting on the cold tile floor by the toilet even a few tears started spilling down his cheeks.
He felt so helpless, his first trial was supposed to be simpler, he was supposed to meet with a more lenient prosecutor and easily prove his client’s innocence, he’d read his attorney’s handbook left and right a million times, how come he hadn’t learned anything?

He straightened down his dress pants, coughing into his hand at the disgusting post-vomit sensation, as he left the booth, eyes focused on the floor, he was met with a familiar pair of shiny black shoes by the sink, eyes raising only to find the same sharp gaze that tortured him in the courtroom. “Oh- Hi! Didn’t realize you’d be here…” Jake wasn’t good at hiding his feelings, he was sure Sunghoon could smell the venomous dislike he held for him from a mile away, but he didn’t even care enough to acknowledge it- to acknowledge him, Sunghoon was unbearable, always thinking he was too good for everything, always thinking he was so above everyone, and what hurt him the most was that he’d proven him in his first trial that he was indeed better than him.
“Nervous?” He asked, the most disgusting smile on his face as he spoke, he wasn’t speaking out of concern, he was only making Jake’s embarrassment more evident, out of a sadistic need of his to always have the upper hand and make sure everyone knows how perfect and pristine he is. “Yeah, I guess so.”
Sunghoon shrugged, and it made Jake want to punch him in the face so bad, “The judge said to meet him in his chambers as soon as possible, you should hurry.” And he spoke absentmindedly, walking out of the bathroom with every bit of grace on his step that Jake was missing, the boy chasing after him to reach the elevator on time and tripping on himself as he barely reached the door before it closed- Sunghoon making absolutely no effort of keeping it for him.

The silence was so awkward he felt like it’d pierce through the door of the elevator and spread to the courtrooms, neither of them looking at their phone or seeking any kind of entertainment, just sitting in absolute silence thinking about what an absolute loser Jake was. When they finally reached the floor, Sunghoon walked out without sparing him a glance, didn't even wait for him to follow when he went into the judge's chambers and nearly shut the door in his face, something about Sunghoon thinking he was an inferior even to the point where he didn’t acknowledge him enough to keep the door open made his blood boil even more- it wasn’t the kind of anger that made him want to prove himself to Sunghoon, it was the kind of anger that made him want to rip his own hair off.

The judge sat waiting behind his desk and showed them both a welcoming smile as they arrived- one of the most comforting things about this trial to Jake was the fact that the judge was so kind and generous, especially to an inexperienced lawyer like him. “You came! Please sit down, both of you.” The elder spoke as he scattered papers across his desk, Sunghoon glaring at Jake for bumping into his chair like he hadn’t been to blame for clumsiness. “You’re both doing wonders out there in court, I genuinely believe there is no better attorney in this country than you, Mr. Park.” Sunghoon smiled and nodded like he already knew it to be the absolute truth. “I’ve come to a realization that even though I wouldn’t like to involve you in my family matters there is no one better to represent my daughter in the proceedings of law that she must submit to.” The man finally stacked up a number of white sheets and slid them over to Sunghoon, who eagerly read through them like a hawk. “I’m afraid she’s been falsely accused of a murder she did not commit and I would like you to represent her in the trial that will take place a week from now in Busan.”

Now, Jake wasn’t one to butt into other people’s business, but his curiosity got the best of him as he leant over Sunghoon’s shoulder and tried to skim through the text, though the taller one immediately ripped the papers away from his line of view. “Why did you call this- Mr. Sim here too? Isn’t he far too young to take part in such an important trial?” Sunghoon loved to boast about being the youngest in his line of work as a prosecutor, but when it came to Jake who was only shy of three years younger than him; he was a child with no ability to understand the adults around him. “Mr. Sim, I know you’re far too overqualified to be a paralegal, but I’ve seen your performance in court and I think this experience of shadowing Mr. Park would be very valuable to your growth as an attorney, I would be forever grateful were the two of you to accept my offer.”
Sunghoon’s brows furrowed, long nails grazing the paper he gripped. “Excuse my indisposition, your honor, but I’m not a babysitter.” And Jake couldn’t roll his eyes further, for Sunghoon to say such a thing in front of a judge was embarrassing enough, but knowing that he fully meant it was even worse. “I understand your discomfort, Mr.Park,” Jake’s eye was twitching as he spoke. “But such a valuable learning experience can’t be wasted, the two of you have great chemistry in court and fully align with my intentions with this request.”

The taller looked him up and down, face so straight and sharp it could cut him into pieces. “I agree, your honor, we accept the offer.” And Jake jumped in his seat, looking straight at the prosecutor. “We!? You didn’t even ask me!” The judge chuckled and disregarded him, once again directing his words to Sunghoon. “You’ll both be driven out to Busan the day after tomorrow, your hotel will be booked and the detectives at the scene have been informed of your names and occupations, please do have a safe trip.”

------------------------------------------------------------------------

In the end Riki was found not guilty due to a lack of evidence against him, Jake celebrated with him that night before packing up a suitcase and heading to the train station the next day- to say he was displeased with the arrangement was an understatement, he couldn’t believe his four years of hard work in law school were being set aside to be some cocky guy’s assistant, he felt the repressed anger building up in his chest as he faced him once again at the train stop, the man looking him up and down like he couldn’t believe what he was wearing.
As they made their way into the near empty train, Jake happily chose a window seat and settled like it was the most comfortable place on earth- at least for the next three hours he wouldn’t have to look at Sunghoon’s face, right?

The elder immediately sat next to him, long legs in conflict with the size of the seat and a large bag hanging from his shoulder- despite it all, looking as graceful as always in the expensive suit he wore. “What are you doing? Go find your own seat. I don't want to be with you.” He muttered, elbowing the other to move away. “Suck it up then, these are the seats on our tickets.” Jake’s eyes went wide at his words, brows furrowed, he couldn’t believe what he was seeing. “The train is empty! Who cares what our tickets say!?”
Sunghoon fidgeted with his bag until he settled comfortably into the seat, once again, not sparing Jake a glance. “I care, go cry about it elsewhere.”

The train ride was hard, Sunghoon fell asleep midway and his head bounced every which way until it ended up on his shoulder, Jake seriously considered pushing him off, though came to the conclusion it was best to let him sleep than to have to listen to his nagging the rest of the way- Sunghoon was a different kind of annoying and unbearable, not only did he think he was better than everyone, he was also convinced everyone else just knew he was above them, he was the kind of person that’d built a career only for the title, Jake had always thought prosecutors were some of the lowest most morally grey people in society, but Sunghoon? He was a different breed of low, he was lower than the crows that gnawed at corpses, he never thought twice before stepping all over someone to get ahead.
And Jake isn’t any stranger to stepping on others, he knew that even as they both got off the train and he made sure to leave him behind this time, he knew that he had to make sure to step on Sunghoon before he stepped on him, he had to stay sharp as a knife and never get caught slipping.

As they were driven to the hotel, Sunghoon looked out the window with something in his eyes that the other couldn’t quite understand- a glint of something far too pure to be found in someone like him, an innocence quiet like nothing either of them knew, the younger finds he somehow enjoys it when he’s quiet and looking out into the streets without that usual glare, without putting up the fort everyone’s always trying their hardest to climb- he’s known Sunghoon very little, but he already knew just how bad he was, he already knew to trust half of what he says, to take advantage of when he’s helpless to attack. “Why'd you try to put Nishimura Riki in jail when you knew he was innocent?"
Sunghoon turned to him with this look in his eyes that was so frustratingly surprised, like he had no idea what Jake was talking about. “I wholeheartedly believed he was guilty. "And he spoke so simply he almost believed what he said, Sunghoon was so cruel and relentless he didn’t even care about lying on an innocent boy’s name. “You knew about the evidence the whole time, there’s no way it didn’t even cross your mind that maybe he was telling the truth!”

“It’s not my job to prove anyone’s innocence.” He deadpanned, looking back out the window with such blank expression Jake felt flustered by how affected he was by the matter- Sunghoon didn’t care about the pain he caused, Sunghoon didn’t think twice before stepping on others, Sunghoon had no one’s interest in mind but his own.

When the two of them finally reached the hotel, Jake stumbled out of the car as quickly as possible to make sure he wouldn’t have to listen to the elder bossing him around, both bags hanging from his shoulders and a his dress pants heavily wrinkled when he reached the main counter and clumsily fished his ID from his shirt pocket.
The woman behind the counter sported bright pink hair and loudly chewed on gum, eyes glued to the computer before her without paying any attention to his arrival. “Excuse me, ma’am, I have a reservation.” He stuttered as his own luggage started weighing him down, the receptionist looked him up and down and went back to the computer like it was no big deal. “Name?”
And he slipped the ID to her over the counter. “Jake Sim.” The kind smile never slipped off his lips, bowing to her with respect and making sure to speak as cordially as possible- none of this in anyattempt to prove how different he was to Sunghoon at all. “I don’t have any reservation with that name.” She muttered, handing his ID back with a frustrated look that made him cower away from arguing about it. “Are-are you sure?”

“Yeah, a hundred percent.”

“Uh- What about-” And Sunghoon finally came, nearly pushing Jake out of the way with his own luxurious brand suitcase. “I have a reservation under the name Park Sunghoon.” He spoke like reciting a monologue, and the woman immediately became smaller at his tone and typed it out on the computer, reaching out to the wall behind her and getting a key with a number engraved. “Here’s your room, Mr. Park.” She said, and Sunghoon simply smiled and nodded, stepping away from the desk without even acknowledging Jake.
“Wait! Are we supposed to share a room? I don’t have one!” A pout grew on his lips, the younger on the verge of crying at the feeling of helplessness the whole trip brought him- he hated feeling like he wasn’t in control, he hated feeling like he didn’t know more than everyone else. “We’re sharing a room, then, hurry.” Sunghoon didn’t stop walking, and while really embarrassed to have made a scene, Jake obediently followed behind him, stumbling on his luggage as he went into the elevator with the stone-faced prosecutor. He was thankful to have a room- but to share it with him? The learning experience better be unlike any other to make it worth.

Sunghoon struggled with the room key for a few seconds until he eventually got it, walking in and throwing his suitcase on the first empty space he found, freezing a few steps into the room and making Jake bump into his back, “Dude, walk! What’s wrong with you?” He immediately protested, his hands lightly pushing on Sunghoon’s back, though the older man didn't give in, only turning to him like he’d just seen a ghost. “Are you sure you don’t have a reservation?”
And Jake simply scowled at him, “Of course I am, why?” Sunghoon simply stepped aside, pointing at the inside of the room where only one couple’s bed waited for them. ”Huh!?” The elder had a hint of a smile on his lips and it only served to aggravate him even more, what was so funny about this? “Guess we’re gonna have to share.” He said, speaking so simply like it wasn’t a big deal, and Jake only stared at him dumbfounded. “What!? No we’re not!” His cheeks started heating up just at the thought, he barely knew Sunghoon, how was he supposed to just sleep with him?

“Come on, kid, don’t make this weird.” The taller muttered as he made his way into the room and hung his coat on the hanger, glancing at the bed like he was analyzing the size. “Let’s just split it in half with pillows.” And Jake immediately started stacking pillows down the middle, sitting on the left side and glaring at Sunghoon from where he sat. “Don’t touch my side of the bed.”
The elder hummed, gathering all the towels he found in the room and going into the bathroom like he was at home- not even looking Jake’s way; just a few seconds later the shower started running and he came to the conclusion he wasn’t getting a response, maybe Sunghoon was used to sharing, or maybe he had an ulterior motive for them sleeping on the same bed.

Jake wasn’t one to get flustered by things like this, after all, the elder was so cold he’d probably get frostbite trying to get close to him, but what worried him the most about sharing a bed with the prosecutor was, surprisingly enough, embarrassing himself in front of him.
It wasn’t like he wanted to impress him or make him think he was worthy of sharing a bed with, Jake simply didn’t want to show himself vulnerable, didn’t want Sunghoon to see him at his most intimate, didn’t want to get caught with no walls up.

And it was like the older could hear him thinking, because right as the train of thought was reaching a destination, Sunghoon walked out of their bathroom in only a bathrobe, messy wet hair framing his face in a much gentler manner than the harsh slicked back style he usually wore- he looked younger, much more approachable and maybe even attractive- keyword, maybe, Jake was absolutely nowhere near deranged enough to consider ogling a semi nude Sunghoon that didn’t even look his way- far too entertained emptying his luggage in search for a change of clothes.
When deliberating about all the ways this trip could go wrong, one variable Jake never considered was being caught staring.
It was a complete accident, his eyes following the trail of clothes on the floor until he was met with Sunghoon’s pale, mole-covered chest staring back at him, he’d only taken a moment to wonder how he managed to make it look so soft to the touch, if it smelled just as elegant and unique as the rest of Sunghoon, if-

“What are you looking at?” The elder’s voice made him jump out of his daze, immediately whipping his head to look elsewhere as he felt blazing heat crawl up his cheeks and ears, what excuse did he have? Quite honestly even after being caught he still wanted to stare, finish running his eyes down the bits he didn’t get to analyse fully, maybe if he stared enough he could figure out what it’d feel like to run his hands down his skin, was Sunghoon warm or cold to the touch? “Nothing! I thought you-you were- my suitcase is- over there, with my stuff, I was just checking!”
Turns out Sunghoon was as oblivious as they come, turning to look at the other’s luggage sitting on the floor almost right next to him. “Oh. haha.” He muttered, walking back into the bathroom with a bundle of clothes in his hands and as soon as Jake was alone he smashed his head into a pillow, face so hot he nearly forgot the intense November cold that had slowly crawled into the room through the edges of the door and windows, he’d already embarrassed himself in front of Sunghoon once, how much worse could it get? He couldn’t believe his own twisted mind for what he’d just done; out of all people, the one he wasn’t allowed to find attractive under any circumstance was Sunghoon.

As a paralegal, Jake’s job was to study the case and learn every single detail that the attorney might miss- from the moment they arrived at the hotel his nose was shoved into the court record to memorize every single part of it- all the while Sunghoon took a long shower and laid down right after; half of their bed was Jake drowning in books and flashcards while the other was the prosecutor lying comfortably in his matching pajamas watching train to Busan and giggling to himself.
Jake glared at him so intensely he could tell the other was feeling it, though, as typical Sunghoon is, he paid no mind to it, glancing between him and the clock every once in a while like he couldn’t believe the younger was stillreading, it annoyed him so much he felt like he’d break the book in his hands, it wasn’t fair, none of this was fair, he was so much better than Sunghoon, why was he being treated like an assistant?

“You’re not even gonna read it once?” His voice came out cracked, frustration getting the best of him as his eyes also teared up when he spoke; Sunghoon immediately turned to him with wide eyes, the sickest smile on his lips as he spoke. “You’ve been biting your tongue the whole time we’ve been here, is that really all you’re gonna say?” Sunghoon is a different kind of evil, no one in this world with a tender heart would ever do such a thing to someone. “We’re going to the scene tomorrow, studying what we have now isn’t as important, why are you driving yourself crazy over it?”
The elder sat up and stared at Jake with something in his eyes that he couldn’t quite decipher, surely, Sunghoon was making fun of him rather than comforting him, right? “I-I- we don’t have time to just sit around and wait! It’s an important case!” He babbled back like a kid throwing a tantrum, realizing midway through the sentence that he wasn’t really making any sense.

“Just go to sleep, we’re getting up early tomorrow.” Sunghoon muttered, turning on his side and turning off the nightlight Jake was using to read, the younger simply groaned and gathered his books beside the bed, the cold night sending chills to his upper arms even with the thick blanket covering him, the wall of pillows that separated them made him wonder if it was warmer on Sunghoon’s side, sharing a bed was embarrassing enough, though he found himself unable to sleep through the night out of fear the other would hear him snore or sleep talk, their first day together had been humiliating and spirit-crushing, but it’d only taught him a lesson to never be vulnerable in front of the other, and to never give him the benefit of the doubt when it comes to human decency or the ability to feel empathy.

He only needed to survive a week, a week speaking to him courtly and not showing any emotion, surely, it couldn’t be that hard.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------
The next morning, as soon as his eyes opened he felt like he’d freeze on the spot, the air so unbelievably cold he couldn’t feel the tips of his fingers- the clock read ‘6:00AM’ in bright red and he could see snow falling outside through the window in the small space the curtains didn’t cover. He rubbed his eyes and groggily sat up, looking around the room to find Sunghoon standing by the bed with a coffee cup in his hand, immediately looking away when their eyes met. “We-uh, we have to leave soon so, please do get ready” His ears turned red as he robotically walked away from their shared bed and Jake struggled to make sense of what had happened, was Sunghoon plotting to wake him up or watching him sleep?

Getting ready was hard, he’d snuck all his clothing into the small bathroom they shared and got dressed right after showering to avoid the same incident as the night before, and as soon as he was done he found Sunghoon waiting for him sitting on their shared bed, hair slicked back as usual and a tight raven blue tie hanging from his neck, he’d always wondered how he managed to always look so sharp and prepared, even sitting on their bed in the early morning with a cup of coffee on his hand he looked like hours of preparation had come into his image, perhaps Sunghoon was just the kind of person that always looked elegant because of his features- maybe it’s just that high society people with a lot of money can’t help looking expensive.
“I’m, uh, ready to leave, are we going to the scene?” Sunghoon looked him up and down like he couldn’t believe what he was seeing, walking over to him with the most blank stare in his eyes, hands landing on Jake’s chest from a distance shorter than it’d ever been between them, Jake near choked on his own spit at the sight, eyes wide as he looked up at Sunghoon with every bit of confusion in his face, the elder held his gaze for a few seconds, smiling like he couldn’t help but enjoy the reaction he’d caused.

Long finger threaded through the loop of the younger’s tie, tightening it up and fixing it to the neck of his dress shirt. “Can’t believe you don’t know how to tie a tie.” He muttered, landing two small smacks on Jake’s chest and turning around like nothing happened, making his way out the door and never looking back. “There’s a car waiting for us, hurry up.”
Jake struggled to move, frozen in place thinking about how close Sunghoon had been just now- it was weird, sleeping in the same bed and breathing the same air the next morning, the younger felt both guilty for not being disgusted enough by the proximity and embarrassed that it’d been so noticeable how much it affected him, Jake is just a shy person, blushing and trembling at any close contact with someone else, it didn’t really mean anything that Sunghoon made his cheeks boil.

The two of them were driven through the busy streets and didn’t exchange a word even despite them sitting almost flush to each other, it was cold and Jake's hands felt like they were going numb, his nose and cheeks blazing red when they got off the car and the snow enveloped both of them like a blanket; Sunghoon didn’t look the slightest bit bothered by it, pristine white gloves stuck to his long fingers like they’d been tailored to fit him, and not the slightest hint of color in his skin.
The murder took place at some luxurious apartment complex, usually defense attorneys wouldn’t be allowed anywhere near an active investigation the way they were, but as the defendant being the district judge’s daughter, Sunghoon and him walked right into the apartment with nothing more than an ID.

The scene was fresh as the criminal investigators were still swabbing for DNA and blood samples, Sunghoon knew exactly where to go and what to do, while Jake clumsily followed him to every corner of the room, nervously bowing to all the workers that took photos of the blood splatters and unusual placements of items.
Sunghoon dragged him all the way to where the main detectives were discussing the crime, gracefully inserting himself into the interaction with his Attorney’s badge while Jake hid behind him like a scared child. “Good morning, officer, I was wondering if we could perhaps have a copy of the autopsy report and notes on the scene.” The elder spoke quickly and didn’t pay any mind to the forensics investigators testing blood right next to him, the eldest detective instantly reaching into his suitcase and bringing out a stack of papers thicker than Jake’s own arms. “Here you go, Park, please leave the scene as soon as you can.” The taller man spoke with a voice so groggy Jake could only guess he’d been woken up in the same manner as him- Sunghoon immediately took him by the arm and dragged him out of the room without even uttering a word, his hand warm even through the thick fabric of his glove and Jake’s own coat.

A cab was waiting for them right outside the complex, Jake stupidly following him in without any question as to why they were leaving and where they were going, wide eyes fixed on Sunghoon like a deer caught in headlights. “To the nearest library, please.” The elder spoke, Jake glancing between him and the driver for a few seconds before growing smaller in his seat, hiding behind bright red scarf that hung from his neck out of embarrassment at how lost he felt, it was like he was Sunghoon’s accessory, the great majority of the people meeting them didn’t even know his name, it felt like such a slap to the face after how long he’d worked to make the title of attorney fit him like a glove, and curiously enough, he was convinced Sunghoon was to blame.

The two of them got off the cab at a large antique library and Sunghoon simply handed him the money to pay while he fast-paced out of the car and went into the building like he came by himself, Jake stumbling to follow him while handing the driver a sinful amount of coins, tripping on himself up the stairs and past the glass door.
The walls were decorated with classic art pieces shelves a deep shade of dark orange, the library was larger than it looked on the outside and held a ceiling of tinted glass that formed the image of a young boy reading at the foot of a cherry blossom tree; the white tiled floor was sprinkled with wooden booths shaped like tree-cut benches, his eyes scanned every single one until he found Sunghoon curled up in one of them, the stack of papers scattered across the table in front of him, Jake shyly made his way to it and sat beside him without uttering a word, afraid to embarrass himself even more in front of Sunghoon.

The elder wordlessly handed him a form, an uncharacteristic smile on his face that made him think maybe, just maybe, the elder noticed how he felt. “The defendant’s boyfriend was shot dead in his apartment a few days ago after a verbal fight with her on a restaurant, he was last seen alive at eight in the afternoon that same day when he went to a convenience store to buy two gallons of chlorine, two packs of cigarettes, a lottery ticket and a sports magazine.” Jake sighed as he began writing down the list on the form, glancing at the papers on the table and trying to skim through the test himself. “How did they catch the defendant?”
Sunghoon turned to him, eyes blank and a small scowl on his face, “It doesn’t say.” He started, looking back at the papers. “But she was arrested the next morning over suspicion of conspiracy to commit murder and first degree manslaughter.” Jake eagerly scattered the documents in search of the autopsy report, puzzled. “How’d they know she planned it?”

Sunghoon tapped his own cheek with his index finger, deep in thought. “A week ago she called one of his friends and vaguely mentioned them not being together by Christmas, though according to her own close friends she had no plans of breaking up with him and made the comment while under the influence.” The autopsy report read exactly what Sunghoon said- instant death at a point blank gunshot to the head. “Whose gun was it?” Jake asked, squinting at the text like a child trying to read a college essay.
“It has the fingerprints of five different people, the couple themselves and a few of their friends- they used it to play around in parties often, but it’s not clear who was the actual owner as it was in his house but he didn’t own a permit for that specific gun.” Sunghoon was so smart, always keeping every possibly important detail in mind and catching all these small things from the big picture just a few minutes after reading the information- even though Jake was still convinced the guy was genuinely evil, he was a dream to work with.

“I guess we need to go talk to the defendant to know what really happened, it’s not looking good for her.” Jake muttered as he skimmed through the form he’d just filled out, and Sunghoon suddenly smacked him on the back of the head, glove off and brows furrowed. “Don’t say that! You’ll spoil it.” the younger turned to him like he’d just seen a ghost, hand smoothing over the spot he’d hit. “What’s wrong with you!?”
As Sunghoon’s lips parted to speak, the dull and irritating ringtone of his phone started blasting in his pocket, everyone in the library turning to look at him like he’d committed a crime while he fidgeted with it to respond to the call- it was common sense not to answer calls in the library, but judging by the way Sunghoon’s entire demeanor changed when he saw the caller, Jake could only assume it was important.

The elder became smaller in his seat as he took the call, whispering to himself like no one would be able to hear him if he did. “Bail? Again? You told me you’d behave until next year, I don’t have all the money in the world, love.” Jake froze in his seat, was Sunghoon married? Was his wife a criminal? “I know, I’m sorry, I’ll send it all to you as soon as I can, I love you, yeah? Take care of yourself, I want to see you soon.” He wasn’t one to stick his nose where it doesn’t belong, but seeing Sunghoon speak so tenderly was rare, nearly impossible to conceive, what had this person done to earn such adoration from someone that barely had feelings? “Bye bye, baby, I’ll see you soon.”
Sunghoon straightened up and went back to his papers like nothing had happened, ignoring Jake’s heavy gaze on him until he couldn’t bear it any longer. “What are you looking at, kid?” And the younger immediately turned away, cheeks growing red. “Nothin’” He muttered, biting back all the questions he had to avoid getting the elder even more irritated. “Just say what you want to say and stop looking at me like that.”

A moment of silence, and then another, “Didn’t know you had a…” And Sunghoon looked at him puzzled. “...a?” Had he read the room wrong? “You know, a criminal wife.” And Sunghoon let out a chuckle so loud people glared at him again, the prettiest smile on his face as he spoke again. “A what? That was my little brother, and he’s not a criminal.” Jake gasped at the revelation, bowing to him like he’d insulted him beyond repair. “I-I’m sorry I didn’t mean to be nosy, I just- why are you paying bail for him?” His curiosity got the best of him, as usual.
“What’s it to you? He’s just a teen, it’s normal for him to get in trouble like that.” Sunghoon’s voice held something different to it, a layer Jake couldn’t quite make out. “So you’re telling me you dedicate full time to putting kids in juvie and jail while your brother is in the same position?” Was he allowed to reproach Sunghoon for something so private? It really wasn’t any of his business, but putting the elder on the spot had been his purpose from the start.

“It’s different, he’s innocent.” Sunghoon’s demeanor never changed, the taller reading his documents entirely unbothered by the conversation. “How do you know he’s innocent? If he wasn’t your brother you’d be fighting to get him behind bars forever.” Was that true? The primordial difference between the two was painfully obvious when they talked about things like this; it was all about maturity. “You know, Sim,” The elder started, still not sparing him a glance. “It’s not my job to put my brother in jail, my job is to take care of him and kindly lead him into adulthood with as little bumps as possible. Your job is to help delinquents without a voice escape the consequences of their actions- whether my brother is innocent or not is none of my business, and you as an attorney should know that, it’s never about who did what and who didn’t, it’s about who’s smart enough to change reality.” What was that supposed to mean? An attorney that doesn’t fight for justice isn’t a real attorney in the first place. “I know you genuinely believe these kids when they tell you they’re innocent and god bless you for that- but over time you’ll realize people are a lot worse than you think, things aren’t black or white, innocent people go to jail all the time and guilty people get away unscathed, if you worry about that you’re gonna be miserable for the rest of your life.”

Jake couldn't believe what he was hearing, out of all people Sunghoon was lecturing him about the morality of being an attorney? Of course things are black and white when it comes to law, even in a flawed system, he couldn't just give up and look the other way when it came to injustice. "You can't just look away from things like that." He muttered, pouty, and Sunghoon anti-climatically put his hand on his back. "You can be sure that she's innocent this time, at least." The elder gave him a smile so sweet he couldn't believe it came from him- maybe Sunghoon wasn't as cold as he thought, to know he was the kind of older brother that would do anything for his siblings melted the icy picture he’d built for himself in court.

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That night the two of them crawled home exhausted, Sunghoon dragging his feet in a manner far too uncharacteristic for him while the snow covered windows cracked and creaked at every graze of the aggressive winter storm air, from the moment Jake went into the room he started feeling unnaturally cold, so cold he'd thrown on all the sweaters inside his suitcase by the time Sunghoon was already in the shower.
The elder came out of the bathroom walking stiffly and already hiding behind a big pile of winter clothes, the two of them ready for bed dressed like they were about to leave for the snow. And neither of them said anything, as the two laid silently separated by a fort of pillows, the windows moving dramatically as the wind shook them from side to side, and Jake briefly wondered if Sunghoon was also struggling to sleep.

"Hey, Jake" as if on queue, Sunghoon started speaking, tenderly. "Are you cold?" It felt like a stupid question to ask- of course he was cold, he'd have to be an inhumane creature to lay unfazed by ten degree weather, but what was weirder was the fact that the icy elder cared. "Yeah."
Sunghoon fidgeted with his hands under the blanket and Jake could feel it too. "Me too." He muttered, sitting in silence for a few seconds after. "May-maybe if we throw the pillows off we'll get warmer." He hadn't heard Sunghoon stutter ever before, in fact, he couldn't believe he'd done it just then; was Sunghoon even capable of stuttering? If you asked him a few days back he would've said absolutely not. "What?"
"I said- if we throw the pillows off we'll get warmer." The elder repeated the sentence with a tone so entitled Jake almost smacked him for it. "I heard you, that just makes no sense." And five seconds of silence followed, painfully so, "what do you mean? We can share body heat like that" he spoke so matter-of-factly that the younger almost agreed, almost. "You want us to cuddle naked?" Sunghoon nearly bounced off the bed in surprise. "What? Why would we get naked?"

"So you do want to cuddle…"

"No? I mean, if we don't have to- why would we cuddle naked?"

"'cause that's what people do to get warm in like- the countryside, or something."

"We're not in the countryside."

"I know! I'm just saying!"

"Cuddling isn't a bad idea, though."

"I'm absolutely not cuddling with you, Mr. Park, I'd rather die."

"You'll freeze to death."

"Get the pillows off if you wanna do it so badly then!"

And the fort slowly came undone, Sunghoon greeting him with a smile when he finally dared look his side, the elder was pale and his messy bed hair was a testament to all the tossing and turning he'd done trying to find an angle where he didn't feel cold anymore, slipping closer to Jake until their shoulders were touching, and the younger fidgeted with his cold hands and tried to get even closer, Sunghoon's body heat felt like a beam of light in the pitch black snowy night.
Sunghoon shuffled even more under the blankets, and Jake could tell he wanted to get closer. "Dude, we're not gonna cuddle." And Sunghoon froze, looking at him like a lost puppy.
"Why not? It's so cold, I feel like I'll die." The younger whipped his head to look at him immediately, brows furrowed. "Because you're my coworker and I can't stand you?" Sunghoon spread his arms as if he was inviting him into a hug, the warmest smile on his face. "Just pretend I'm someone else?" His pleading eyes were surprisingly shimmering even in the dark of their room, Jake's stomach twisting and turning at the thought. "Why does it have to be me? Why don't yousnuggle up to me? You're the one that's cold…"

Sunghoon giggled, the sound surprisingly lighthearted to a Jake who's heart was about to beat out of his chest. "Because you're so much smaller than me! You fit right in my arms." The whole sentence in itself felt disgustingly intimate, had Sunghoon given this situation a thought even before it happened? To think about the older planning how it'd be to have him in his embrace felt a new kind of strange. "Fine." He sighed, slowly pressing his forehead to Sunghoon's chest and feeling the elder wrap both his arms around him- he was so warm, the beating of his heart lulling Jake into sleep like he hadn't been struggling to relax for ages, Sunghoon smelled sweet and elegant and manly and amazing and Jake hated himself for sniffing him so bluntly the elder giggled. "Good night, Jake." Were they on a first name basis now? Jake had only ever slept with his mother before this, it all felt ridiculous. "Night."

Sunghoon's scent was one he'd never forget- so uniquely his he could recognize it anywhere, and it was oddly endearing even as he lay pliant in his arms, Jake always had a problem with being seen as he slept- felt all too vulnerable and in danger, to the point he'd cover his bed with curtains and mountains of teddy bears to keep curious eyes from making him feel exposed, it'd been an obstacle in his past relationships as he was practically Incapable of letting anyone into where he slept, the pillow wall they'd built between each other wasn't only for comfort but for Jake it was one way to prevent going into a frenzy, to trick himself into sleeping as soundly as he could.
Yet, wrapped up in Sunghoon's arms and with one cheek pressed into his chest, he felt safer than he had in a while. Sunghoon was reliable and older and smarter and apparently just what he needed to get some of the best sleep in his life, Jake was used to sleepless nights past thinking up scenarios where he was more comfortable than he really was, this time there was no need- because he was right where he was supposed to be, and because nothing would ever happen to him as long as he was with Sunghoon.

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The next morning he woke up early with guilt and shame whispering in his ear, Sunghoon's left arm under his head and the other lazily thrown over his waist, so warm and so safe he almost didn't listen to the voice telling to get away immediately and never look back. He snuck out of bed with the other still sleeping soundly, face so peaceful it pales in comparison to Sunghoon's usual stern demeanor, and Jake felt even guiltier for staring as he left, the image of the elder's sleeping face never quite leaving his mind even after he'd led himself to the library where they studied together the day before, a stack of books under his arm and bed hair messier than it'd been in a while.

He knew he smelt like Sunghoon and it was even more upsetting how much he liked it, he briefly wondered if he should get the same cologne- the thought raising a disgusting twisting of his stomach that immediately made him sick, what had Sunghoon done to him? Suddenly it felt like every train of thought reached him eventually, surely, he was just uncomfortable being so intimate with him while barely knowing each other, he doesn’t hate Sunghoon any less just because he smells good, the thought of having enjoyed his night next to someone so morally questionable and perverse was what made his chest tighten and his stomach flutter.
As if on queue, a hand pressed against his shoulder and spread a blooming warmth in his heart so foreign he briefly wondered if he was going to throw up, looking up at Sunghoon standing next to him like a deer caught in headlights. “Wh-what are you doing here?” He asked, brain absolutely empty with nothing but Sunghoon’s bed hair and sweet scent in it, how did he know he was there? “Usually when I spend the night with someone they say goodbye in the morning.” The elder spoke calmly as he sat next to him, his own stack of books under his arm as Jake’s cheeks turned raspberry. “Sorry, I wanted to hurry.”

Sunghoon giggled, opening a big book right down the middle with a fancy feathered separator between the pages. “Did you sleep well?” He muttered, reading silently beside him like he was talking about the most common thing in the world, Jake was flustered and angry and upset and so, so small next to him. “Yeah, whatever.” And the elder’s pretty eyes looked back up at him, making his heart stutter. “Let’s just forget-forget we ever- you know.” Sunghoon’s face fell so adorably, and he hated feeling like it was all his fault. “Oh, yeah, alright.” The elder muttered back, voice so timid his heart clenched, was it really that easy to break his spirit?
The two of them read in silence for a while, Jake stealing glances from the other every few seconds to make sure he was okay- obviously,he didn’t really care if he hurt his feelings, he was just checking in case he got the satisfaction of feeling like he took a painful jab at his stupid ego.

The elder seemed completely unfazed, reading the same thick book as when he got there and tapping his foot under the table, not paying any mind to whether it inconvenienced Jake or not. “We’re gonna meet with the defendant in an hour, by the way.” And the younger jumped in his seat, whipping his head to look at him like he’d just insulted him.
“What? Why didn’t you tell me!?” Sunghoon turned to him with the most innocent look in his eyes, pouty lips parting to speak and Jake reprimanded himself for staring. “I just found out this morning.” He muttered back, and Sunghoon’s eyes fell on the apple of his cheek, rose-tinted and with a single fallen eyelash laying on it.
It was like his instincts took over, pinching Jake’s cheek to take the lash in between his index and thumb, while the younger looked at him flabbergasted. “Make a wish.” Sunghoon said, showing him the two fingers stuck together like it was an extremely important piece of information. “Uh- well-” Sunghoon’s free hand flew to his mouth, signaling him to shut up. “But don’t tell me what it is!”

Jake brought a finger to his bottom lip in thought, looking around the library like he was waiting for the wish to jump at him on its own, ‘I wish Sunghoon loses this case so his ego deflates.’ He thought, nodding at Sunghoon to let him know he’d made the wish, and the elder sheepishly smiled at him, “Top or bottom?” He asked, and Jake was taken aback. “Excuse me?”
“Will the eyelash be on top or bottom?” He asked again, showing him the two fingers, and Jake hummed, not even giving it a thought. “Bottom.” Sunghoon separated the fingers, the single eyelash sitting at the tip of his thumb. “You won! Your dream will come true.” The elder’s round eyes shimmered as he spoke, smiling so sweetly at Jake he caught himself staring for a few seconds, lips parted and chest tightened, swallowing the full sentence he wanted to spit out. “That’s so childish.” Sunghoon simply chuckled, blowing the eyelash away and closing his book. “And? Your wish is coming true, be glad.”
Jake felt a tinge of guilt at this, did Sunghoon even suspect he wished ill upon him? Perhaps he should’ve used his wish for something else. “You better hope it does.”

The two of them spent the rest of the hour reading silently until Sunghoon got a call to head to the penitentiary to meet with the defendant and dragged Jake out into a cab that was already waiting for them outside, the snow was long melted by the time they arrived and Jake turned pale at the sight of the inside of the penitentiary, the two of them sharing a stool as they sat across a transparent glass waiting for the defendant to come- Sunghoon bounced his leg up and down, nervously, his hand looking for something to grip and Jake's instinct to hold was immediately pushed down.
Through the prison gate came a young woman with box dyed ginger red hair and bushy dark eyebrows, lip gloss showing their reflection as she sat across from them with puppy eyes and held the booth phone shakenly. "Are you my lawyer? "She asked, eyeing Sunghoon up and down before speaking again, index finger pointing at Jake. "Who's this?"

Sunghoon smiled, the same plastic practiced grin he showed at the courtroom where they met. "I'm Park Sunghoon, your lawyer and he's my paralegal-" Sunghoon stopped speaking for a second, looking at a fidgety Jake sitting next to him "Sim Jaeyun, we'll represent you in the upcoming trial." The younger sighed in relief, waving at the young girl sheepishly before nudging Sunghoon with his elbow, asking him to start questioning her about the murder. "So, Ms. Hwang, could you please tell us a bit about the night of the incident? More specifically, where you were when the murder took place."
The question prompted her to unravel the story beat by beat, Jake soon realized Sunghoon was great at his job, directing her and asking exactly what needed to be asked for clarity, building a testimony- not vague, but not unnecessarily explicit.

Jake took note of everything relevant on a notepad, eyes glued on Sunghoon until the alarm by the gate rang and a tall officer came to them, tugging at the handcuffs that bound her wrists. "Thank you so much for listening, Mr.Park, I hope I can see you soon!" The lady spoke excitedly as she was dragged away by the guard, Sunghoon letting out a sigh so deep Jake felt like he needed to take one too. "Want some coffee?" The elder asked, a sweet smile on his face- Jake just nodded, following him out of the penitentiary with his arms around himself like he needed Sunghoon to protect him.

The two of them sat together at a nearby coffee shop with cups in their hands- Sunghoon had ordered a milk coffee with a sinful amount of sugary toppings while Jake had only gotten a bitter dark watery one for himself, the younger of the two sitting silently and looking away from the other as a means to avoid conversation. "That was so hard back there, I really thought she was going to ditch me." Sunghoon spoke, sighing and sipping from his coffee absentmindedly, Jake sat across him bewildered, what did he even mean? It looked like an absolute piece of cake. "What? You didn't look it at all."
"Are you serious? Because I totally forgot your name for a second there, I wasn't being funny."
Sunghoon was so egoistic he couldn’t even have a normal conversation without making it about how much better he is than Jake, the younger simply scowled at him, focusing on the bitterness of his coffee like it’d make the one in his stomach any more bearable. “Guess you got lucky then.” Sunghoon took the biggest breath he’d seen him take, the boy so much more tender now than he’d ever thought he could be, the elder seemed so much more comfortable around him, while Jake sat stiff on the wooden stool.

“You know, you being there made it a lot easier, people don’t open up easily to me, but with you there I think she felt more comfortable.” Jake’s word vomit crawled up his throat, his eyes almost watering as he croaked out what he needed to say. “I’m not really good at all that stuff.” He muttered, Sunghoon turned to look at him absolutely astound, lips parted, round eyes wide. “Who told you that?”
Jake looked up at him, lip quivering, he’d been wrong to voice out an insecurity like that in front of someone that should be ready to pounce on him and make it even worse- was Sunghoon comforting him? “You’re great with people- especially defendants, it’s really cool how you make people talk just like that.” His chest tightened at this, heart racing as he couldn’t look away from the other’s eyes, it was so sweet and heartwarming to hear someone appreciate his unorthodox approach as a lawyer- to not be seen as weak but just different. “Thanks.” He spoke, voice cracking in the slightest and Sunghoon simply smiled, bringing up his hand and gently ruffling his hair.

Sunghoon was unbelievably kind for someone that made a living out of ruining other people's lives, and Jake felt stupid thinking that perhaps the elder understood and accepted him for who he was in a way that no one else had before he met him, truth is, he's always thought of the idea of being appreciated as a result of a transaction- to be accepted by his father in exchange for him becoming s lawyer, to be accepted by his university classmates in exchange for him helping them with schoolwork. But what had he done for Sunghoon to look at him so tenderly?
"Do you actually like coffee that disgustingly bitter?" The taller boy asked, and Jake glanced between the mug and the other's eyes for a few seconds; he didn't, really, but he'd always drank it like that because it made him look more serious. "Yeah." He muttered back, giving Sunghoon the smallest of smiles and taking a sip from his unbearably bitter coffee.

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The storm quickly came before the two of them made it back to their room, windows cracking beneath a thick layer of snowflakes and frozen droplets of rain, the wind so strong Jake briefly wondered if it would rip the window out of its frame overnight, the two of them sitting wrapped up in blankets with their shoulders touching on the queen sized bed, shaking even while fully surrounded by each other's body heat under the blanket.
Sunghoon looked around like there was something he was missing, and shifted closer to Jake, "Should we cuddle again? I don't think I can sleep tonight…" He spoke with such calm demeanor Jake couldn't believe what he was saying, Sunghoon took these things so lightly while he hadn't been able to shake off that guilty feeling even a whole day after they'd slept together. "I don't really want to." He muttered back, knowing full well that it was all a lie. "Are you sure? You're trembling." And Jake curled up on himself even further, looking at Sunghoon like he invaded his privacy. "No I'm not!" He said, exalted, and the elder simply giggled, smiling so pretty as he did. "Alright then."

And the two of them sat in silence for a few minutes, listening to the clatter of the wind and the snow hitting the walls, sitting flush against each other until Sunghoon finally turned off the last remaining light in the room other than their tv- the nightstand lamp, becoming smaller next to Jake and shamelessly cuddling up to his side. "Good night." He said, wrapping his hands in the blanket like a cat looking for a good place to sleep.
Jake sighed, looking at him with a scowl and finally deciding to stop playing dumb, flicking Sunghoon's forehead. "Ow! What was that for?" The other protested, watching as Jake slowly laid down as well, wrapped up in blankets and uncomfortably close to Sunghoon. "Move. let's just do it like last night, you're not gonna leave me alone anyway." He wanted desperately to act like he didn't like their position, not even smiling at Sunghoon as he opened his arms wide again and invited him in.

Laying against his chest was so natural to Jake he felt like the drumming of their hearts was synchronised, the two of them laying in silence and letting their warmth build up slowly despite the aggressive storm that waited for them outside. "Thank you." Sunghoon muttered, his hand gently sitting on Jake's back and the younger felt like he could die any second from overheating. He smelled so good Jake couldn't stop reminding himself that he'd never smell anything like that anywhere else. "Whatever, good night."

And Jake had every intention of sleeping right as he said that, closing his sleepy tear-filled eyes and resting his head on Sunghoon's chest as comfortably as he could- breathing soft and slow and completely focused on getting every bit of Sunghoon's smell into his lungs as quickly as possible.

Though, just a few minutes after he closed his eyes, an overwhelmingly new sensation took over, the other's warm breath on the top of his head, and a touch so gentle he sat there for a few seconds wondering if it had all been a dream, immediately pushing him away and looking at the other with wide eyes and furrowed brows, heart racing, and a swirl of negative emotions in his stomach making him feel sick. "Did you just fucking kiss my hair!?" He asked, absolutely angry and surprised and upset and warm and captivated, watching Sunghoon's surprised expression turn into one of terror and guilt. "No! I-I didn't- why would I-"
And before he could finish, Jake started speaking again, frustrated. "You did! Don't even try to tell me you didn't because I felt it! What the hell is wrong with you!?" Perhaps he was being a little harsh, watching Sunghoon stumble on himself looking for an explanation, cheeks blazing red and an absolutely mortified look on his face. "I'm so-so sorry, I didn't mean to!" The elder's round puppy eyes begged him to please drop the subject, but Jake had too many questions to do such a thing. "Why would you do that? Are you trying to prank me or something?"

Sunghoon looked around the room like he was looking for some of their furniture to give him the response he needed, so ashamed he couldn't bring himself to respond or even look him in the eye. "I-I-uh… I just- it was a bad habit, I'm sorry, I didn't really mean to-" Jake didn't believe him in the slightest bit, slipping further and further away from him every time he opened his mouth.
"Tell me the truth or I'll- I'll go home right now! Why would you do that!?" Sunghoon's eyes were swimming with sadness and shame unlike any he'd ever seen on him, the elder's lips nearly quivering as he tried to speak but the words never seemed to come out, throat dry and heart thumping loudly in his chest. "I'm sorry, Jake, I just-uh, perhaps I have a tiny, little bit of a- a crush on you."

Jake couldn't believe what he was hearing, eyes wide and lips parted as he listened to the other's confession, absolutely perplexed. "I'm sorry, I know this is really unprofessional and I shouldn't have let such a thing happen, I just- I've felt this way about you for a long time and I-uh…" His voice was unbelievably small in comparison to the one he usually wore, shaky and weak and embarrassed, Jake was beyond surprised at the confession and he hated the way it made his cheeks heat up rather than making him feel sick.
"Listen, I'm flattered, but- I- you know I hate you, right? I can't stand you most of the time, I'm really sorry if it's harsh, I just want to be honest with you, there's like- absolutely no way I would ever even think of seeing you that way." Liar.

Sunghoon gave him a sad smile, nodding with a look in his eyes like he was holding back tears. "I know, I'm sorry that I-I- you know." He muttered, looking down at the fort of blankets they were sharing. "If you want, I'll- I'll sleep on the floor." And Jake felt mean, because what kind of person would make someone sleep on the floor with this crazy weather? Apparently him. "Yeah- that'd be nice." His words left his lips before he even finished thinking them, and Sunghoon hummed, head hanging low, and sad look in his eyes that made Jake quiver, he’d spent so long thinking of him as a robot programmed against feeling anything, yet, it seems like he was much more familiar with feeling than him.

Sunghoon ended up sleeping on the floor with two blankets- one under him and another one wrapping his limbs, his pillow propped up on the room’s embroidered carpet and Jake had the coldest night in his life, his own thin and scarce sheets proving to hold not even half the warmth Sunghoon’s embrace did- turns out sleeping like this wasn’t just uncomfortable, but lonely and bitter as well; he didn’t get a wink’s sleep that night, mind too preoccupied in complicated thoughts about just how had he missed so many signs from the other, Sunghoon said he’d liked him for a long time and suddenly all those jabs the elder had taken at his personality started taking a different meaning, Sunghoon hadn’t been frustrated at his lack of professionalism when it came to his clients, the impossible unconditional empathy he felt for all those kids, he found it all infatuating rather than embarrassing.
He couldn’t get him off his mind, looking back at all those hurtful things he’d said, all the time they’d spent together during the trip and Sunghoon hadn’t looked away from him for a second, always so tenderly gazing at him from behind and guiding him with the utmost gentleness, on that first trial where they’d met, was he perhaps flustered when he saw him? Had he known of Jake before then? What could he have possibly done for a man so cold and hard to hold such sweet and innocent feelings for him?

After spending a sleepless night watching the ceiling of their shared room, he found himself looking over Sunghoon’s sleeping figure as soon as the morning sun started peeking through the windows, discreetly thinking to himself how bad he wished he was in his arms- it was all about warmth, after all, even though the confession had softened up with heart when it came to Sunghoon, it didn’t change the fundamentals of his hatred towards; the elder might be incredibly sweet and caring, but he was still shamefully relentless.

The air was thick and dense as the two got ready in the morning, Sunghoon flashing him a sweet smile every time their eyes met and Jake desperately wanted to think to himself what a hypocrite he was for it, to be angry and upset and disgusted that he treated him so kindly even though he’d rejected his feelings, but a part of him couldn’t help but feel bad, to let himself melt into the fluttery feeling in his chest every time they touched- it only made him even angrier, just how badly he wanted to give in as well.
Sunghoon waited for him by the door of their room as soon as they were both ready, waiting for him with that same charming look in his eyes. “We’re going to the penitentiary again- and grocery shopping, we have, like, nothing to eat.” He said, opening the door for Jake to leave first, and he merely scowled at Sunghoon, nodding like he had no other choice but to comply, and following him with heavy steps just to show him how unwilling he was to go.

As the two of them sat in their cab, their knees touched and Jake retreated from him like his skin burned, looking at Sunghoon and finding he hadn’t even noticed, the boy looking out the window with his signature glimmering eyes fixed on the myriad of trees outside, the driver nearly jumping on his seat when Jake finally spoke. “We should ask for a second room when we get back.” And he knew exactly how that sounded; cruel.
“Oh, yeah, I don’t think there’ll be any, though.” Sunghoon said, looking at him with big round eyes, looking out the window like he was thinking to himself. “I’ll call the judge later and ask.”
Jake didn’t mean to be so cruel, “I don’t mind if it’s in a different hotel.” But there was a part of him still looking to win, even if he couldn’t beat him in court- would breaking Sunghoon’s heart be enough?

When they finally arrived at the penitentiary, Sunghoon still waited for him when he got off the cab, still walked slowly to make sure he followed and still opened the door for him, the two making their way into the prison with big eye bags and suitcases with nothing but papers in their hands. This time, the defendant was waiting for them already, sitting in her stool as she cleaned her nails and curled her bangs with her fingers. “Hey! Didn’t think you guys would come so early- oh my god, what happened?” She spoke, jumpy, and leaned into the glass like she was analysing Sunghoon, who sat across from her with his brows raised. “Nothing, why do you ask?”
And she looked between the two of them, eyes wide, “You guys look like you didn’t get any sleep, especially in that cheap suit.” She spoke, pointing at Jake who quickly covered his chest with his hands, Sunghoon giggling. “It was cold.”

The defendant leaned closer to them, taking a good look at their tired expressions. “Is it my fault? ‘M Sorry if I’m worrying you too much.” And it was funny, because neither of them had thought about her for even a second last night. “You’d be surprised.” Sunghoon said, pulling a stack of papers from his briefcase, sliding them over to her through the small opening of the glass. “This is the autopsy report, we have your story on the court record and we have one witness that states you couldn’t have been on the scene at the time of the murder, the trial is tomorrow so I need you to be sure of what you’re going to say.” Jake was only vaguely aware of everything that was happening, stealing glances at the papers every chance he got and putting a close eye on the defendant as she spoke with Sunghoon- as a paralegal, there was little he could know about the case, though the elder had let him get a good look at all the important papers simply because he knew he was curious, in the end, whatever he thought about her innocence didn’t matter, because Sunghoon was the one handling the case anyway.

The three of them talked out the testimony and wrote it down for her to practice it, spending a good two hours in the penitentiary before they were free, and Sunghoon led him out with every bit of kindness he always had for him- it ticked him off, the way he opened the door for him and even waited for him to put on a seatbelt, leading the taxi driver to some restaurant downtown with the sneakiest smile on his face, when the two arrived, Jake tripped over himself on the way out the taxi, looking out into the restaurant like he’d never seen one before. “You said we were getting groceries.” He spoke sternly, and Sunghoon chuckled with his hands in his suit pockets.
“We don’t really have any food at home, so…” He trailed off, looking at Jake with round shiny eyes, and offering his hand to lead him in like he couldn’t walk by himself, and his chest burned as he let himself in, the other’s hand left empty between them. “Fine. But we’re not gonna stay long.” He spoke, cheeks red, and he followed Sunghoon inside without a single protest.

The inside of the restaurant wasn’t quite as fancy as he expected from Sunghoon, and as it was half empty they were quickly led into one of the free tables for two- wooden chairs creaking as they pulled them back, the elder handed him a menu and he didn’t even look his way as he took it, scanning it for whatever he usually ordered everywhere he went, “The trial is tomorrow so we should study when we go home.” Sunghoon said, closing the menu and placing it back on the table, Jake looked back at him, puzzled. “Do you actually think we’re gonna win?” He asked, finally looking into Sunghoon’s eyes again, and the other simply smiled at him. “Of course I do.”
And it didn’t feel sincere- as sincere as Sunghoon could be. “How are you so sure? We don’t have anything more than a testimony.” Jake chose his order silently and put the menu down, propping his head up on his hands. “I learnt from the best.” Sunghoon said, a charming smile on his lips that made Jake’s cheeks turn red, since when was he comfortable complimenting him so openly?

It made his blood boil, thinking that the elder found it amusing or even just a little bit hopeful that Jake would change his mind about his confession from last night, was Sunghoon trying to convince him to like him? “You need to stop doing that.” He said, a pout growing on his lips without meaning to, and Sunghoon looked back at him bewildered. “Doing what?”
“Trying to sweeten me up, I don’t like you and I’m not gonna like you.” It felt mean to speak to him so bluntly, but the elder simply scoffed, giving Jake those same round and sweet eyes he always gave him. “‘M not doing anything.” He muttered back, making the younger sigh, annoyed. “Whatever.”

“We can’t spend the rest of the trip just- not talking.” Sunghoon said, glancing at the waiter that came to their table and babbling out his order, waiting for Jake to say his own as well and waving him goodbye. “What are we supposed to talk about? Our college majors?” The younger asked, taking a short sip from the cup of water they’d been handed by the waiter, watching as Sunghoon gathered their menus together and left them stacked somewhere on their table, speaking without looking into his eyes. “We had the same major, there’s probably not much to talk about there- our schools, though, those are probably a different story.”
And Jake could already feel his blood boiling in annoyance, Sunghoon was so quick to start flexing his privileged background, it made him feel even worse about his own equally privileged background. “What’s that supposed to mean? You don’t need to tell me about whatever fancy university you went to.” And Sunghoon got a good chuckle out of that, a huge smile on his face and eyes shut, leaning back on his chair as he covered his mouth with his free hand. “I went to public school, you probably beat me on that one.”

Jake’s eyes went wide, brows shooting up his forehead, he couldn’t believe it- Sunghoon was so pretentious it was hard to think of him relating in any way to the kinds of people that attended public school. “Well that one’s hard to believe.” He muttered, watching as a waiter came and took the menus away, Sunghoon simply hummed, sipping his water as well. “It’s hard to get into fancy schools when you take a gap year.” The younger’s eyes nearly jumped out of their sockets, heart racing as the other giggled at his reaction. “You took a gap year!?”
Sunghoon smiled at him so sweetly, looking so amused at Jake’s surprise. “I did, yeah.” Sunghoon seemed so uptight it was hard for him to visualize the elder seeing anything as more important than his career- especially now, knowing how professionally driven he was, the elder was probably the best attorney he’d ever met, and for him to have gone through such common circumstances only made him every bit more insecure about himself as a lawyer, clearly, Sunghoon just about had it in his blood to be this good. “Why?” He asked, round puppy eyes looking up at him with so much curiosity the elder simply laughed again. “So you're interested now?”

Jake shrugged, watching the elder speak with much less judgement now, with Sunghoon’s guard down he felt like he could demolish his as well, for him to be able to open up like this so easily must mean that was completely sincere about his feelings for him- Jake had thought this entire time that the hatred was requited, but with every conversation they had he felt even more convinced that this wasn’t true. “I had to take care of my brother.” He said, matter-of-factly, and the water came with their food almost immediately after, leaving Jake to wonder what he meant by that. “Your brother? The one from before?” He asked, no filter in his mouth as he finally started digging into his food, mind going back to that one call back at the library. “Yeah, he was in juvie and needed someone to watch over him.”
Sunghoon seemed to have no problem talking about this, but Jake couldn’t help but wonder how hard it must’ve been for him to set aside his studies for something like that. “Why’s he…Like that? I mean- If you don’t mind me asking.” This time he giggled himself, watching Sunghoon struggle to eat his noodles why he spoke, and the air didn’t feel half as heavy as it did that morning. “He’s just a lil’ lost is all, he’s a good kid, he’s just- unlucky.” And he could tell the elder himself didn’t know the answer, be it because he adored the kid so much he couldn’t see him doing any wrong or because he was embarrassed to say why, all Jake could think of was- “I wouldn’t do all that for my own brother.”

Sunghoon hummed, an array of noodles of different lengths in between his lips. “You’d probably do more if you had to.” Jake was surprised to learn in these past few days how highly the elder thought of him, it seems like Sunghoon had a long time to watch and admire his personality and identity as an attorney. “Guess it’s because he’s older.” He muttered, and Sunghoon’s eyes went wide while looking at him, “Of course you’re a younger brother.” He deadpanned, and Jake’s cheeks turned red, lips parting to speak, before realization hit him mid sentence, “Wait… If you took a gap year, that means you graduated late-” Jake started counting on hand’s fingers, brows furrowed and eyes wide. “You’re my age!” He claimed, accusatory, pointing at a Sunghoon that calmly ate his food and started counting on his own fingers.
“I’m actually a year older.” He spoke again, and Jake kept counting, looking absolutely confused. “What year were you born in?” Sunghoon giggled again, showing a one with his index finger. The younger one deflated, finally starting to eat his food. “I thought you were much older, you kept treating me like a kid.”

The elder smiled at him, bright and charming. “You do strike me as someone quite a bit younger than me.” Jake’s pout only grew at this, heart clenching at the thought that that was the impression he gave, “Guess we really misjudged each other.” And he fully meant it, after speaking so candidly with Sunghoon he felt like he owed him the benefit of the doubt after all, that maybe he wasn’t the evil feeling-less being he’d been so convinced he was when they met in the courtroom.
The two of them finished eating in between giggles- turns out Sunghoon is extremely pleasant to have conversations with and had a billion facts about him that were not only unexpected and uncharacteristic but also surprisingly sweet- he’s an avid dog fan and has a puppy named autumn, he watches dramas every night on terrestrial television and drinks tea and coffee with a minimum two cups of milk, his favorite color is white and he’s deadly afraid of heights.

To say Sunghoon was endearing as a whole would go against Jake’s internal monologue in any way; when you’re someone as morally driven as Jake you usually have a tendency to see things and people as good or bad, but he couldn’t bring himself to decide if Sunghoon was good or bad, ideally, he’d say he’s bad through and through, but despite being bad he’s warm and sweet and caring and loving and he makes Jake’s own heart feel at contradiction.
When the two of them arrived at the restaurant, it was cold and cloudy but without the slightest sign of snow- Sunghoon had worn this thick wool coat that made Jake scoff when he first saw it, but as they left and noticed the snow had piled up outside as they waited for their taxi, he couldn’t regret only wearing his cheap suit any more than he already did, wrapping both arms around himself and trying his best to conceal the trembling, though, obviously, the other immediately noticed.

“Are you cold?” He asked, looking him up and down with his eyes fixed on Jake’s blushy cheeks and red nose, he shook his head, but Sunghoon could tell he was freezing, “Here. I don’t need it that much.” He muttered, taking off his coat and slowly placing it over his shoulders, Jake looked up at him, in a trance, immediately bringing up his hands to hold the coat in place while he tried to convince Sunghoon to take it back. “It’s-It’s fine! You’ll get cold!” And it felt insane that he actually cared whether the elder felt cold or not.
Sunghoon simply took one of the shoulders of the coat and stretched it over himself, making it so the two were covered in as much warmth as possible, Jake’s eyes immediately falling to where their upper arms rubbed together, fighting the urge to sniff his side of the coat. “Is this fine?” The elder asked, and all he did was nod, rubbing his legs together for heat and wallowing in the sweet smell of Sunghoon.

When their taxi arrived, Sunghoon left the coat just for him, and he had no problem nuzzling into it as they sat inside, the elder looking out the window without even paying him and his coat a glance, Jake simply melted into the warmth, a smile on his lips at the contempt feeling spreading in his chest- he liked being with Sunghoon, a lot more than he’d ever like to admit, and being with him made him feel whole in a way- complemented, felt complete.
The two of them stumbled into the hotel mid-giggles, talking about that one trial with Sunoo and Riki and how badly they’d both treated those kids- Jake wouldn’t allow himself to find this funny anywhere else, but with Sunghoon things seemed so simple he could turn off the compass and enjoy himself despite the voice in his head insisting he needed to be quiet.

The receptionist called for them as soon as she saw them come in, signaling for the two to approach the desk, and Jake awkwardly followed her instructions as he still struggled to walk with the long coat that hung from his shoulders. “Hey, Mr. Sim, the government officials called and got you a room that was free this morning- here’s your key.” It was what he’d wanted so badly since he first got to Busan, yet, he couldn’t help but feel disappointed, looking back at Sunghoon and expecting him to convince him to stay in the room but finding him simply grinning wide, he’d probably called for him to get a room that morning, a room he needed, but suddenly didn’t want.
“Uh, thank you, ma’am.” He muttered, nervously taking the key she offered and eyeing the keyring with his room number- he was on a completely different floor from Sunghoon.

The elder simply followed him to the elevator, the same pretty smile on his lips, and neither of them even thought for a second about Jake giving the coat back. “Do you need help with your luggage?” Sunghoon asked as soon as they got to their room, and the younger simply shook his head, pouty, as he took his suitcase and handbag, keyring looped around his index finger, “It’s fine, I’ll do it myself.”
Sunghoon ruffled his hair, and for a second he felt like chest did a short-circuit. “The trial is tomorrow, so let’s meet at the lobby an hour before, yeah?” He asked, Jake hummed and made his way out of the room like a sad puppy, getting back on the elevator and sighing to himself, upset, why was it so upsetting to be apart from Sunghoon? A part of him was genuinely worried about how he’d get any sleep that night, as much as he’d been uncomfortable sleeping next to the other, he had to admit it was some of the best sleep he’d ever gotten.

As soon as he was inside his new room, he plopped down on his bed and took a second to sniff the coat he was wearing, briefly wondering if he could sleep with it on but quickly deciding it was far too pathetic to allow himself to do such a thing, it felt lonely sitting in the room all by himself without the white noise of Sunghoon’s stupid tv show or the rattling of the pages of his thick books- all Jake could do alone in his room was read up on the trial in preparation for tomorrow, his own books made up of black and white copies of Sunghoon’s.
He spent the rest of the afternoon obsessively reading the court record, building a mental map of every detail in the case and practicing the defendant’s testimony over and over again, if anyone were to ask him if he genuinely thought this person was innocent he’d probably say he didn’t know, but he couldn’t seem to get the other’s words out of his head, ‘it’s never about who did what and who didn’t, it’s about who’s smart enough to change reality.’

Was Jake smart enough to change reality? Most definitely not, but Sunghoon was- and Jake felt like his part in helping him was simply trying to stay out of the way, the elder probably had the whole case figured out left and right, all the younger could be sure of was the fact that they’d both do anything to win.
When night came and it started snowing again, Jake wrapped himself in every blanket he found and hoped for the best- trembling under the covers and forcing his eyes closed to try and get even a second of sleep, but the cracking of the windows and the freezing cold that slipped through their openings was like a megaphone going off in his ear, it was so cold he felt like his sleepy tears would freeze if he didn’t blink often enough.

Eventually he got to a point where he simply decided against sleeping, the square shaped clock next to his bed reading 2:05 in bright red when he finally sat up and turned the night lights back on, a binder in hand with every important paper nuzzled inside it, and it was like he’d already learned the words by memory, reading them over and over waiting to find some small detail he might’ve missed, he’d read those papers left and right a million times, yet he couldn’t bring himself to stop checking them and do something else because he felt like he was wasting precious time.
He briefly wondered what Sunghoon could be doing, was he also sleepless and studying the case until his eyes burned? Perhaps he could go to his room and they could study together the rest of the night and-

It was a terrible idea, right? He couldn’t possibly find any reason for which he could logically get up right now and walk to Sunghoon’s room with those books in his hand, there was absolutely no way he could ever convince himself to do such senseless, selfish, pathetic thing, because he knew very well they’d do anything but study if went, he knew he’d end up sleeping in his arms until the alarm rang.

Yet, almost immediately after the idea popped up, he found himself wrapped up in the elder’s coat, riding the elevator in the dead of night and walking down the festive-decorated hallway lit up by yellow lights shaped like candles, he’d made up his mind that if Sunghoon didn’t open at the second knock he’d walk back to his room and force himself to sleep immediately, the books in his arms were simply to make an excuse for the appearance, he knew he’d fall asleep immediately in Sunghoon’s warmth.
When he finally made it to their room, he knocked as shyly as one could, hand shaking as he did and his cheeks growing red at the thought that he’d really convinced himself to do such a shameless thing, yet his heart stuttered when he hear shuffling inside, a smile crawling up his lips at the prospect of seeing him again.

Sunghoon opened the door wide-eyed, hair messy and cheeks red, immediately reaching out to place a hand on his shoulder like he’d escape if he didn’t hold him in place. “What happened? Are you alright?” He asked, looking at him like a deer in headlights, and Jake held back a laugh, he was probably in his fifth dream by the time he knocked on the door.
“I’m fine!- I just, you know, I- um, I couldn’t sleep so, I thought- you know, since it’s so cold-” It felt even more stupid now that he had to say it out loud, lifting the books to show them to a puzzled Sunghoon that watched him silently like he couldn’t understand a word he was saying. “I mean- only if you want! I could go back- to my room, I mean, I should probably-” The elder scoffed, stepping back and stretching his hand to show him in. “ It’s fine, you can stay.” He said, softly, and Jake went into his room like it was his salvation amidst the dark winter night he’d spent all by himself.

The room was even neater than when they shared it, all of Sunghoon’s own study books sitting on his nightstand and not a single light in sight other than the tv where the nighttime news played silently- he’d learned recently that Sunghoon struggled to sleep without it. “Want me to sleep on the floor?” And he wasn’t joking, he genuinely meant it, taking a pillow in his hand and pointing to where he’d slept the other night, it felt ridiculous for him to say such a thing, but knowing how oblivious Sunghoon was, the idea that he’d asked to tease him was simply out of the equation. “No, it’s fine.”
Jake awkwardly sat on his bed, side-eyeing the patterned pajamas he wore and giggling to himself, Sunghoon simply sat next to him, looking at him so tenderly he felt his cheeks heat up. “What’re those for?” He asked, pointing at the books, and Jake put them with his on the nightstand, “Just in case.”

It was awkward- crazy awkward, the two of them watching the tv in silence because neither of them had the courage to ask the other to go to sleep, Sunghoon’s coat was long gone somewhere on the floor and their hands were inches away from touching where they sat on the queen sized bed, “Do you want to-” Sunghoon started, opening his arms like before, and Jake scowled at him, nodding. “Whatever, fine.”
And they laid just like before, legs entangled under the covers, Jake’s cheek pressed to the other’s chest and an arm around his side, their breathing slowly synchronized and Jake found he was much sleepier than he thought, eyes closing on their own as he took a whiff of the elder’s scent.

They sat in silence for a few minutes, Jake’s voice hoarse with sleep as he spoke, “Hey, I’ve got a bone to pick with you.” He spoke, hands bunching up Sunghoon’s shirt as the elder simply hummed, chin propped on top of the other’s head. “The other day- you said you’ve, like, liked me for a long time- what’s that supposed to mean? I’ve known you for less than a week.” The elder sighed, lying silent for a few seconds before finally willing himself to find the right words to speak. “We met this one time when you were still a practitioner- you probably don't remember because I was in the audience."
Jake shot up immediately, looking at Sunghoon with wide eyes. “What!?”
“It was my brother's hearing over some store robbery, we didn't really have money for an actual lawyer so the court appointed him a team of practitioners and a novice, no one really cared about the trial because it was his third time in for the same thing and he was barely sixteen." If he tried, he could actually remember the few trials he'd watched and practiced in before he became a defense attorney, though he didn't know the defense team was decided like that, it felt unfair to think that not even the court system had any hope for this kid's innocence. "None of the lawyers really did anything to defend him, the trial was boring and even the judge turned away from him when he gave his testimony, but there was one person in the entire courtroom that swore he was innocent, even after everyone had given their two cents, even after the jury had made up their minds, you didn't give up on him and still pursuit the not guilty verdict even though it would've been easier to make a plea."

And that was Jake's defect as a lawyer, always believing his defendant even if the entire world was against them. "Guess I just thought it was really sweet." It made his cheeks grow red, he'd thought before that his empathic approach as an attorney made him look weaker before someone like Sunghoon, but it seems like it put him at an advantage. "Did we win?"
The elder chuckled, arms still tightly wrapped around him, “No, you didn’t.” Jake had lost so many cases as a practitioner he couldn’t remember Sunghoon’s brother even if he tried, it felt crazy to think that despite losing, the prosecutor still held him to such a high pedestal. “I’m not really built to be a lawyer.” He admitted, his fears and insecurities eating up at him now that he was about to take part in one of the most important trials of his career, truth is, he hadn’t ever thought about how fit he was for the profession until he found himself falling apart in the courtroom, what was scary about that night wasn’t the darkness or the cold- it was the anticipation. “Hey, now, that’s not true.” Sunghoon muttered, gently caressing his hair and leaning on him even more. “You’ve been good.”

He couldn’t explain why, but hearing Sunghoon tell him something like that felt impossibly fulfilling, the other’s approval and encouragement was so sweet and exciting every time he got he felt like a rush of calm spread through his entire chest- if Sunghoon thought he did good, then he must’ve, right? Someone as smart and reliable as him couldn’t get it wrong, it felt like he could withstand a billion trials if Sunghoon kept telling him how good he was.
He pulled away from the other’s chest, looking into his eyes with own open wide, hands still bunching up his shirt, and their noses nearly brushed each other from how close they were. “Really?” He asked, and Sunghoon smiled at him like he couldn’t believe he had such an impact on him, reaching to put his hair behind his ear, with his gaze still fixed on Jake’s own, their breathing in sync and the younger wondered what it would feel like to touch his lips. “Really.”

Turns out he was right, the few hours left till morning were spent doing anything but sleeping- when it comes to Sunghoon, he finds it’s extremely easy to start conversations that never end, he wound up falling asleep mid-sentence, and the elder had to tuck him back into his chest, the two of them sharing a warmth so special Jake couldn’t recall ever feeling it before, one that made him feel fully rested after a three-hour-long night, even taking his time to watch the other sleep in silence for a few minutes after he woke up.
When the alarm went off, the two of them stared at each other wide-eyed, like they couldn’t believe they’d spent nearly the whole night talking about stupid things that had no importance to the case- Sunghoon immediately let go of him, leaving a cold print where his arms served as seatbelts the night before, Jake’s cheeks turned red as he pulled away himself, nearly falling off the bed from how far he’d pushed himself, breathless thinking about what he’d done last night, how would he ever get over the embarrassment of showing up at Sunghoon’s door unannounced at two in the morning? “What time is it?” The elder asked, and Jake turned to the clock sitting behind him on the nightstand. “It’s nine o’ clock.”

Sunghoon immediately started shuffling out of bed, tripping over his coat that lay on the ground and checking his phone from the nightstand on his side. “Do you have any clothes here?” He asked, and Jake immediately sat up, panicked, and stumbled out of the blankets as well. “No, not anymore.” Sunghoon giggled, picking up towels and rushing to the bathroom, poking his head out the doorway with a huge grin on his face. “Let’s meet at the lobby, alright?”
Jake simply nodded, making his way out the room and feeling the cold air immediately, blushing as he briefly wondered why he hadn’t been so cold the night before and realized it was because he was wearing the elder’s coat. What had possessed him to do such a bold thing the night before? That feeling of disgust and rejection he used to feel every time he thought of being with Sunghoon was suddenly replaced with this warmth and endearment that swarmed his chest the night before. Sunghoon was a terrible person, so why was he so sweet and nice to be around?

Jake has liked people before- he’s liked tons of people before, but when it came to dating and falling in love it was all a different story, he’d never felt this way about anyone, especially someone he disliked so strongly; yet, even as he was getting dressed in his own room, he couldn’t help but think about how nice it felt to be with him, every thought that came into his mind ended in Sunghoon, did Sunghoon get mad because he took his coat? What about that other night when he’d woken up to the other looking at him? Had Sunghoon accepted the trip because he wanted to get closer to him? Was Sunghoon in love with him?
He couldn’t stop this even after he’d gone down to the lobby, his heart racing when he caught sight of Sunghoon with his usual expensive and luxurious suit, shiny shoes but no slicked back head of hair- this time, the elder wore his natural hair, two strands framing his forehead and doe eyes looking right at Jake through them, he felt himself shudder at it, hand shyly reaching up to wave at him, but immediately feeling embarrassed at the gesture and shoving it back in his pocket, cheeks impossibly red.

“Are you alright? I just got a call that the defendant is already at the courtroom” Sunghoon spoke like he had no idea what was going on in Jake’s head, and the younger simply nodded, scratching the back of his head and getting a pat on the shoulder from the other- his eyes immediately searched for Sunghoon’s, while the other smiled at him as kindly as ever, “Let’s go, then.”
He thought for a second about the possibility of linking arms, though he immediately backtracked at how incredibly embarrassing the thought of being rejected was, tripping on himself as he went into the car from horribly distracted he was- there’d be no way for him to win this trial if he was the main attorney, his brain felt like mush of scattered images of Sunghoon, sounds Sunghoon made, things Sunghoon said, and things he wanted Sunghoon to do, he felt like he couldn’t even think up a full sentence, his brain was empty and full at the same time.

Suddenly, he noticed the other sitting next to him abnormally stiff, hands nuzzled in between his knees and two wide eyes looking out the window with a nervousness that didn’t seem like it’d ever fit inside him, he hadn’t seen him this nervous, and to think that his extremely reliable partner was shaking in his seat, taking big breaths and trying to soothe himself by stomping his feet was enough to send him into a frenzy, just how much had Sunghoon studied? He never thought there was a possibility they could lose, in fact, the only thing that could possibly go wrong was-

The eyelash.

Jake has never been superstitious, he struggles with even believing in the traditions his own mother taught him, yet, as soon as the wish he made the other day made its way into his brain, he felt his entire body run cold, watching Sunghoon wide-eyed and wondering if he should apologize, if he should do something to correct it, if there was something he could do to make sure it didn’t come true- the Jake that made that selfish wish was sitting somewhere inside him repenting for such a selfish action, under any other circumstance he would’ve completely forgotten about it, yet, now he couldn’t shake the feeling off, the thought of Sunghoon losing made him feel every bit more helpless, both their careers would be over if they failed the judge’s daughter, they’d have to move to a different country, change their name and give up on pursuing law forever.

As they arrived and Sunghoon started getting out of the car, he couldn’t help himself from grabbing a piece of fabric from his sleeve, pulling at it softly to get his attention, “Wait, there’s something I need to tell you!” And the elder stopped walking, though their driver immediately pushed them both to keep walking, leading them into the lobby of the courtroom quickly, Jake tripping on his shoes and still trying to get a word with the elder.
Sunghoon stopped walking for a second even as he was urged inside, turning to Jake with wide eyes. “What is it? Are you alright?” He asked, and the younger tried to find ways to put his stupid predicament into words, he felt like an absolute idiot bringing something like that up again, yet the thought of not fixing it made him feel so helpless, his brain wouldn’t stop pushing him, what if that was, indeed, the reason they lost?

“Pull one of my lashes out.” And Sunghoon blinked at him in silence, bewildered and with his lips parted. “Huh?”
Jake placed both of his hands on his shoulders, looking so desperate people around them were probably noticing. “Pull one of my lashes out! Quick!” The elder’s brows furrowed, raising his hands to signal he didn't understand even a bit of what was going on, the bailiff begging them to go into the courtroom quickly before the trial began. “What!? No!” Sunghoon said, and Jake found he had no time to waste, reaching in and pulling one of Sunghoon’s lashes off, placing it in between his index finger and thumb. “Ouch! Why did you do that!?”
Jake simply showed him his hand where the lash was, shaking it to signal him to move faster. “Make a wish! Hurry!?” Sunghoon’s entire face fell then, looking at him like he couldn’t believe he’d do such a thing. “Are you serious?”

The younger pondered for a second, perhaps he was wasting precious time that could be used to study the case further, but he couldn’t care less now that he was convinced the world would end if he didn’t do this quickly. “Hurry!” The taller sighed, closing his eyes and standing in silence for a few seconds before opening them again. “Alright, done.”
Jake showed him the two fingers again, brows raised. “Top or bottom?”
“Top.” Sunghoon deadpanned, and Jake hurriedly separated the fingers, eyes scanning them to find where the lash had landed- however, there was no lash, fingers empty as the two of them hurriedly looked for iron the floor and on their clothes, the younger felt like he’d start crying any second then, pouty as Sunghoon put a gentle hand on his shoulder, looking at him with the same sweet eyes as before. “Hey, it’s gonna be okay, we’re gonna win.” He could feel the elder was trembling, yet he was still trying his best to make him feel better- to say Jake was moved was an understatement, he felt so cared for, so protected, so loved every time he was with the other, even now that their careers were in grave danger, he felt like could fully trust Sunghoon to solve it for them, like no matter what happened he had his back and they would find a way to fix it together.

Sunghoon was so reliable and loving and caring and sweet and enchanting, even as they stood amidst a small crowd of lawyers and reporters making their way into the courtroom, he found himself leaning in and kissing him.
His lips were as soft as he’d imagined, and as soon as they touched he knew there really wasn’t anyone else for him, Sunghoon would take care of him forever if he had to, and he would gladly take care of him as well, even in the golden glow of his eyes cast on him, Jake could see every detail of his face on the second their lips joined; he knew he’d feel ridiculous later, he knew the other would tease him for it, he knew the people around them were probably quite taken aback, but he was proud- because he beat him to it, because he did it first and he didn’t miss this time.

The elder pulled away fast, giggling as he ruffled Jake’s hair, finally reaching out for his hand and intertwining their fingers, neither of them paying any mind to the people around them- Sunghoon was truly glowing, the most beautiful smile he’d ever seen on his lips. “Let’s win this, alright?”

Hopefully, they would.