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Jensen A had been acting since he was nineteen. Soap operas and some bit parts in established TV series at first. When he was 25 he got his big break being cast as Captain America in a new marvel TV series. Now at 29 he was a seasoned professional, with four seasons of a hit show under his belt, unsurprisingly there were many who thought he had it all figured out. But like all mortals Jensen was still human and had many of the same failings and fears as the rest of the world’s population.
Every year there were a series of conventions that had to be attended. Jensen dreaded them. His co-star Misha Collins always tried his best to help Jensen through. Jensen’s natural shyness made conventions difficult for him, fans probing and often times personal questions made it even more so. Misha was the king of the diversion, fans would get so wrapped up in his antics that they would forget what the question had been. Jensen lacked his ease and feared being frozen on the spot, a deer caught in the headlights look on his face.
He was also sick of the said same questions being peddled out. Was he seeing anyone? What was his type? Seriously years ago he had come out as bi-sexual, and he was sick of explaining that he was far too busy to have a relationship right now. And no he wasn’t in to Misha, he knew the man far too well to ever find him sexually attractive. Next question please.
The best thing about the Dallas Con was that it was on home turf. Jensen always felt better when he was close to family and his parents always tried to show up for Dallas. As he ducked down the halls trying to keep himself hidden Jensen found himself momentarily distracted by a set of broad shoulders attached to a very tall, shaggy haired man. As the man rounded the corner with a shorter fair haired guy Jensen overheard the following, “He’s more than just a pretty face Chad. You know nothing about him..”
Jensen really wanted to know who the tall guy was talking about, did he mean him, maybe Misha, some people thought Misha was pretty. Selfishly Jensen kind of hoped the guy meant him.
Jensen spotted the man twice more, one time talking to a young boy who seemed to be lost, tears filling his eyes. The man lifted the kid up on to his shoulders, and mere moments later the kid was smiling and pointing. The man moved in the direction the child indicated, depositing them a minute later at the feet or a very relieved looking mother. The man brushed off the thanks before heading back the way he came.
Jensen sometimes dressed up at conventions so he could mingle with the fans unbeknownst to them. Today he was the winter soldier, Misha’s character. Several people stopped him for pictures, Jensen, safe in his disguise, posed happily, or solemnly as the character dictated. As he went around the vendor room he spotted the tall man again, sitting at one of the vendor booths. As he drew closer Jensen realised it wasn’t a vendor booth really, it was one of the charity booths he’d asked them to consider adding a few years back. Five or so charities got booths at zero cost. Different charities in each city. Jared’s booth seemed to be a suicide prevention charity.
“Hey, cool costume!” the tall man called out to him.
Jensen nodded his thanks as he approached, disguising his voice as best he could Jensen asked, “Are you guys fundraising today? What’s the deal?”
The tall man smiled wide, dimples appearing in each cheek. “Glad you asked! We are selling these awesome t-shirts.” he said, holding one out to Jensen. The art work was original but Jensen thought he recognised his profile on there, “to raise money to allow us to continue to run support groups for LGBTQ teens right here in town, and also to help us keep funding a website where teens can ask any questions they have or talk about any issues they are experiencing with trained counsellors anonymously.”
Jensen was stunned, this man was something else. “I’ll take two large please.” he said after a moment, trying to smile, but remembering at the last second that his smile would probably give him away.
“Sure thing, that will be 30 bucks please and thank you.” the man said, passing Jensen a bag containing the shirts.
Jensen pulled out a fifty, “Cheers, please keep the change as a donation.”
“Seriously? Wow, thank you so much, I really appreciate that.” Jensen had to leave right then, if the man's smile got any wider Jensen wouldn’t be able to stop himself from leaning over the table and kissing him. Waving Jensen backed away, reluctantly turning and heading to the green room to change for the pannell he had still to get through.
Jensen took his seat behind the table, straightened his name tag and waited. The first question was asked by the fair haired friend of the tall guy. “Jensen, could you please describe your perfect guy?”
Jensen bit back a groan, this one he’d deflected many times and was prepared to deflect it once more but an image of the guy he’d seen earlier flashed through his mind and he found himself answering honestly, “Taller than me would be nice but not essential, someone who sees past the fame and my supposedly pretty face, someone whose first instinct is to act out of kindness.” The fair haired man's jaw dropped, disbelief written clear across his face. Obviously he had expected Jensen to deflect the question or refuse to answer, by the vaguely stunned silence so did the rest of the room. Jensen cleared his throat self consciously his gaze dropping to the table, suddenly afraid that the tall man from earlier would be looking at him and just know.
Because of this Jensen missed seeing the questioner return to his seat beside said tall man he’d just been thinking about. He also missed the wide smile that crossed the tall mans face caused by Jensens surpassing his expectations yet again.
Thank god for Misha Jensen thought as he called out in a booming voice “Next question!”
The rest of the convention passed in a blur and fortunately or unfortunately depending on Jensens current point of view he did not see the tall man again.
The following day Jensen went out incognito with his sister Mac to their favourite dinner. They were hidden away in a booth, Jensen’s back to the door, when Mac’s jaw actually dropped. “Oh my god, wow, the hottest, and I mean this, the absolute hottest man ever just walked in” she whispered, her eyes scanning up and down a cheeky smile on her face. The waitress at the counter called out a greeting, “Hey Jared! The usual?”
“Please, thank you. I’m starved and I have a bunch of report cards to write and guidance counselling sessions to try and schedule, god why does time speed up at weekends?” he replied, his voice laced with a certain tone indicating he knew exactly where the time had gone.
The waitress laughed, “Chad was in earlier, said you dragged him to some convention or other? You do know you are too old for that sort of thing right?”
“Maureen, how can you say that? I’m barely 26, and you are never too old for that sort of thing! Seriously, Misha and Jensen are cool guys, they do so much charity work, I really admire how they use their fame for good. Besides the kids in school think its cool, they’ve promised to pool together and pay for a photo-op for me next year.” Jensen could hear the grin in Jared's voice from where he was sitting.
“A what now?” Maureen asked.
“Photo opportunity” Jared explained patiently, “They were giving out to me Friday for not forking out to have a picture with either of the guys or bothboth taken.”
“Couldn’t you afford it?” Maureen asked.
“They are pricey, but its not that. I’m just, well I don’t think, it might be weird is all.” Jared tone sounded doubtful or maybe fearful, Jensen really wanted to look over and see what expression was on the mans face. Instead he leaned slightly out of the booth hoping to hear better.
“Weird how?” Maureen asked gently, placing a plate down in front of Jared.
“Like you said, I’m kind of old for that sort of thing.” Jared refused to admit even to himself that his sexual revelation came when he was 22 and saw Jensen in his Captain America outfit for the first time. Meeting the man for real might prove too much.
“You just said you weren’t too old, it is more than that I think. But whatever, next time he’s in town I hope those kids do buy you that photo op thing, if they don’t I will.” Maureen’s tone brooked no argument.
Jensen finally returned his focus to his sister who was looking at him curiously. “Do you know him?” she asked, her voice barely above a whisper.
Jensen shook his head no, “I saw him at the convention Saturday in the hallway for maybe a second, never spoke to him or anything. He didn’t see me see him, if you get what I mean? Obviously he saw me at the panel but there he was in a crowd of over a thousand so I didn’t see him then.” Jensen's voice was barely above a whisper.
Jensen sighed, “I think his boyfriend was with him, so it’s nothing, don’t get all match maker on me.” Mac grinned, Jensen worried, he knew that look, no good had ever come of it.
Mac left her seat on the pretence of going to the bathroom, on the way back she detoured via Jared’s table. Jensen slouched down in his seat, pulling his hat low over his face, a pre-emptive blush covering his cheeks.
“Hey sugar!” Mac fluttered her eyelashes at Jared as she spoke, drawing up close to the men's table.
Jared looked up and replied, “Hello miss, can I help you with something?” His smile was polite Mac thought, not flirtie at all.
“I sure hope so!” Mac began, exaggerating her accent something terrible, “I was at this convention thing Saturday, and I think I asked your boyfriend to hold this poster I meant to get signed for me, while I fixed my hair see, and ditz that I am I totally forgot to take it back! I don't suppose you could give him a shout and see if he still has it?” Mac fluttered her eyelashes again figuring it couldn’t hurt.
Jared replied, “You must mean Chad.”
Jensen slouched even further, hell he’d been right, Jared was taken and Jensen was too much of a gentlemen to try and do something about that, even if Jared was the first person of any gender to peak Jensens interest in over a year.
“Do I?” Mac asked.
“Probably! He’s not my boyfriend though, just a friend . I am gay though, just to be clear.” Mac figured the clarification had to do with her flirty eyelashes. Jensen wanted to let out a whoop, but he settled for a mini fist pump, Jared was gay and at least not dating Chad.
“Gay, hot and taken no doubt.” Mac stated, an exaggerated pout on her lips.
Jared barked out a laugh, the sound of which had Jensen grinning and biting his lip to prevent himself laughing in tandem.
“No, no, just overly tall, awkward, gay and single.” Jared clarified.
Jensen let out an unmanly squeak as he felt a small hand clamp down on his shoulder, “Jared, I want you to meet someone.” Mac stated, Jensen felt his sister tug hard, her nails cutting in to the skin of his shoulder through the thin material of his t-shirt. He had no choice but to stand up or fall out of the booth.
“Jared, this is my brother Jen. Jen this is Jared. Say hi.” she instructed, all business the sweet flirty persona gone without a trace.
His hat still low over his head, his eyes barely glancing up enough to meet Jared’s gaze, Jensen nodded and said, “Hi.”
At first Jared was confused, but then he started to catalogue details. The leather bracelets on the wrist, the silver ring on the middle finger of the left hand, glancing upward, shit Jared recognised those lips. The things he’d imagined, “oh hell” he thought, rising to his feet too quickly and nearly toppling on top of his number one fantasy man. Lucky Jensen had fast reflexes, reaching out a hand to steady Jared instinctively, his fingers closing tightly around Jared’s bicep. Jared was half dying with embarrassment and half thrilled to realise he was meeting Jensen A.
“Hello” Jared finally managed to choke out. Jensen reached up and tilted his hat back, revealing his face. Jared was please to see it looked a little flush.
“Sorry about Mac.” Jensen said indicating the woman grinning like a mad man behind him. “She means well.” he added needlessly.
“Do you, I mean, have you eaten? I was just, sit a while maybe?” Jared didn’t know what had become of his brain, he was a counselor for gods sake, speaking was sort of an important skill.
Mac shoved at her brother until he was sitting on the opposite side of Jared's booth. Once he was seated, she disappeared briefly before reappearing with Jensens pie and coffee. “Bye now!” she wiggled her fingers at them before dropping a fifty on the counter by the waitress and heading out.
“Ehm, yeah, so that just happened.” Jensen raised his head and finally met Jared gaze.
“Apparently so” Jared agreed, a stunned but happy look on his face. His eyes raked over Jensen's chest and shoulders before snapping back to his face.
“Your t-shirt? Where did you get that?” he asked incredulously.
“I bought it from you at the convention Saturday.” Jensen admitted.
“You were the winter soldier! I thought you seemed familiar at the time.” Jared didn’t want to admit that it was Jensen’s smile that had nearly given the game away. Jared just hadn't thought it possible.
“I noticed you, at the convention.” Jensen stated.
“It’s the height thing, I’m hard to miss.” Jared agreed almost sadly.
“No, it was the shoulders if I’m being honest, but then also what I heard you say, something about someone being more than a pretty face, and the kid you helped and then the charity thing, you seemed too good to be true.” why was he still talking Jensen wondered, as he willed himself to just shut up and try to act cool.
“Were you stalking me?” Jared asked laughing.
“No, no! I swear!” Jensen exclaimed.
“Dude it’s cool, I’m kind of flattered.” Jared dropped his eyes to the table a deep blush staining his cheeks.
“I promise I’m not that weird.” Jensen reassured Jared.
“I can handle weird.” Jared said, “I work in a high-school, I’m surrounded by the weird and wonderful everyday”
Jensen smiled, relaxing finally, Jared got it, he understood Jensen had all the same social insecurities as anyone else and wouldn’t judge him because of it.
Jared finished his lunch, and Jensen finished his pie. Both men consumed more coffee than sensible, both reluctant to leave. Eventually though the waitress was at their table clearing her throat, “dinner time rush is due to kick off in 2 minutes, if you guys don’t want to be made by the group of teenagers I see heading this way I suggest you scram.”
Jared and Jensen thanked her, left a generous tip (especially since Mac had technically already left one) and made their way outside.
Once they were on the sidewalk Jensen realised he had no ride home, Mac had taken the car, as well she should, it was hers after all Jensen remembered. “Ehm, don’t suppose you could give me a lift home?” Jensen asked scratching the back of his head self consciously.
“Sure, sure” Jared readily agreed.
Jensen had planned to go to his parents place, but once in Jared’s truck he changed his mind. His favourite track ever was on the radio and Jared was totally rocking out to it, Jensen decided it was a sign.
“Right here, yeah, just turn here, past that park, this is me.” he said as they pulled up beside a set of gated apartments.
“Nice, your family live here?” Jared asked conversationally.
“No this is my place, I don’t get to spend a huge amount of time here but it’s still home. Would you like to see?” Jensen asked, trying to hide his nervousness. He didn’t think anyone outside of Misha and his immediate family had ever been inside his home.
Jared turned to him, a stunned yet hopeful look on his face. “I’d be honoured.” he replied truthfully.
Jensen smiled and hopped out of the car, leading Jared through the gate and up the lift to the top floor apartment. Jared was expecting something large and flash, something designed by someone who thought they knew what a TV star would want versus what the man himself would actually want. He was surprised to find the apartment was the exact opposite. Yes it was large but not overly so. The couch was massive and littered with a seemingly endless array of cushions, all in various shades of blue. A thick cream and blue rug covered a massive chunk of the dark wooden floor. The walls had a mixture of classic movie posters, and family photos dotted along them.
The kitchen was clean and looked like it was designed for someone who actually cooked. It took Jared a minute to notice, but what the room lacked was a TV. Where you’d expect a TV there was instead a solid wall of books. “Wow, Jensen, this place is fantastic, I love it.”
Jensen smiled proudly, “I did much of the refurb work myself, with my dad’s help. Mam helped my hang all the pictures. Got professionals in to building the bookshelf though.”
Jared was impressed, “So much more than a pretty face.” he said mostly to himself.
“That’s what I heard you say at the convention. Were you talking about me?” Jensen had to ask.
Jared nodded, “I was trying to explain to Chad, if you were just a pretty face you wouldn’t appeal to me, but you're so much more. You do a shit tone of charity work, you got us the booths at the conventions for free, you give time to young fans. You are out in Hollywood! Do you have any idea what a big deal that is to LGBTQ kids? Man the stories I could tell you, seriously, you’ve saved lives with that.”
Jensen was blushing furiously, “I’m not, I’m nothing special Jared.”
“Like hell you’re not, you sir are awesome.” Jared positioned himself right in Jensen’s personal space as he continued, “Everything I’ve learned about you today, only tells me that I underestimated how awesome you actually are.” Jared spoke softly as he dipped his head to rest his forehead against Jensen’s, his hands resting tentatively on Jensen's hips.
Jensen placed his hands on Jared’s hips, before tilting his head back and seeking out Jared’s lips with his own.
Jared did not hesitate to respond, shaping his lips to Jensen’s he kissed back softly but surely. Groaning deeply as he felt Jensen rake his fingers through his hair tugging slightly to get a better angle. The kiss went on for several minutes, tongues exploring and tangling together, hands sliding through hair, and grasping at shoulders. Eventually both men drew back breathless. Screwing up his courage Jensen took Jared’s hand and tugged him in the direction of his bedroom before asking, “Stay?”
Jared wasn’t one for one night stands and didn’t really know how to respond. But it seemed Jensen could read his mind, “Not just, you know tonight, but like, for as long as you want to be here.”
Spying the worlds biggest f-ing bed through the bedroom door, Jared walked Jensen back toward it as he spoke, “If that thing is memory foam, I’m never gonna want to leave.”
Jensen smiled widely against Jareds lips as he confirmed, “It is.”