Work Text:
Deadpool was just walking down the street when some casual robber ran into him.
The bad guy panicked and pulled a gun out. Deadpool look ed down at it and reached forward, simply grabbing it and the bad guy jumped back, sack of money in his hands.
“Way to be a cliche.” Deadpool said. “Why don’t you give me the money and you can go to jail and we dont make a fuss?”
The bad guy however wanted to make a fuss cause he pulled out a bigger gun.
“Like that is going to-“ the guy pulled the trigger and instead of a bullet, a large explosion pushed Deadpool backwards into the building behind him.
He went flying through the window and everyone inside screamed and ran for cover.
Deadpool groaned and stood up, ears ringing as he looked around.
“Daily Bugle?” He asked the secretary and she nodded with wide eyes as she slowly hid behind the desk.
Deadpool turned and looked up. “Thats a huge globe.” He commented right as it fell down, covering the front of the store. “Fuck.”
The bad guy had jumped inside the building before the metal globe fell in front and Deadpool ran up to him.
“Hey buddy! Wanna meet my fists? Meet Dwayne.” Deadpool punched the guy and the dude groaned loudly, dropping the gun. “And meet Johnson.” Another punch and the guy went down.
“Together they make the Rock!” Deadpool punched the guy square in the face and he fell to the floor unconcious.
Deadpool dusted his hands off and looked around at the people inside. “Anyone know a guy who can move a ten ton globe?” He asked and a few people shook their heads.
Deadpool looked at the metal globe and sighed. “I know a guy, but he refuses to give me his number.” He mumbled in disdain.
“Alright! Guess we’re all stuck here for a bit!” Deadpool said, smile big even under his mask and he walked up to a guy who was helping a girl get to her feet.
“Aren’t you a little hero?” Deadpool said and the guy flinched at his voice, eyes wide and glasses crooked.
“Uhm,” the guy spoke, voice familiar but Deadpool didn’t care enough to try and name it.
The man had brown hair that was all ruffled and gorgeous eyes that shone despite the power getting knocked out when the globe fell. A flannel was worn over a t shirt with a hoodie thrown over both, jeans a size too big and shoes falling apart on his feet.
[cute]
{shut up only Spiderman is cute}
[yeah but hes cute too!]
{no he isn’t}
“Yeah he is.” Deadpool said and the woman walked away while the man blinked at him. “Uhhmmm, what?” He asked, words sounding forced.
“Nothing, what’s your name, Bambi?” Deadpool asked and the man groaned like this has happened a million times. “Peter.” The man, Peter, replied.
“Oh! You’re the guy who takes all those cool photos of Spiderman! I was wondering if you could like, hook a brother up? Cause I’d love to have more photos of my Spidey to hang up and-“
“Nope! Only photograph for the Daily Bugle!” Peter said, voice sounding choked and he flushed a bit.
Deadpool narrowed his eyes and Peter looked away.
Deadpool slowly lifted a hand up and pushed up his glasses. “There, you were looking dorky. Like cute dorky. But messy.” Deadpool said and then turned and went to bug someone else.
Peter watched him leave and swallowed harshly, face on fire and he put a hand on his chest.
That was close.
Too close.
Deadpool was an observant guy, he knew a lot about Spiderman that Peter had never told him, but he apparently couldnt figure out Peter was Spiderman when he was two feet away from him.
But still,
Peter pushed his glasses up his face, running a hand through his hair and sighing.
It wasn’t that Peter didn’t trust Wade with his identity. It was that he didn’t trust Wade to accidentally let it slip who he was.
Sure, everyone knew Wade was Deadpool, but no one knew Peter was Spiderman.
And the people who did know normally got hurt.
Peter knew it was stupid to keep it from Wade, the other would do his best to keep his secret, he can’t get hurt, not permanently at least, and he wouldnt have to keep lying to him.
But Peter didn’t want to risk it.
Hes risked and lost too much so far, losing Wade, his partner (in crime stopping), his first friend in years, he didnt want to lose it.
“Hey, Bambi, you good?” Deadpool was snapping his fingers in front of Peter’s face and the brunette jumped.
“Huh?” He asked and Deadpool cooed. “Aw, you’re so cute with your wide eyes and fluffy hair! That angry old dude was yelling your name.”
Peter flushed at the comment which made Deadpool coo more and Peter turned to talk to J. Jonah Jameson.
“Hey, kid. You get any photos during that fight?” He asked and Peter fumbled with the camera he was holding.
“Yes! I did!” He said and proudly pulled out a fee polaroid photos he had taken.
“Hm, good work kid. I need a headliner, Blood Hero Trashes Daily Bugle! Or Spider-Menace’s Pal Makes Trouble?” Jameson went away mumbling to himself as he looked over the photos and Peter bristled a bit at what he said but sighed and turned away.
~~~
“You’re late, Spidey!” Deadpool sang and Spiderman turned. “Sorry, shit happened at work today and my Aunt was worried. She was hovering over me all night.”
“Awww, you still live with your Aunt?” Deadpool teased and Spiderman deadpanned.
“She lives with me. She’s getting old and needs help. I keep trying to convince her to retire, she practically works herself dead.” Spiderman said and Deadpool listened carefully as he does when Spiderman shares something about himself.
“You’re adorable.” Deadpool commented as casually as he said the sky was blue. “I met this other cutie today too! Might have you in a competition.”
Spiderman rolled his eyes, though of course Deadpool couldnt see. “You don’t know what I even look like.”
“I know what your ass looks like and I know that’s cute.” Deadpool commented. “But anyway, he’s that little photographer who takes pictures of you at the Daily Bugle. I asked him to hook me up with photos!”
Spiderman chuckled a bit and turned to Deadpool. “A fan? So you’re stooping so low since you can’t get the real me, huh?”
Deadpool souttered as Spiderman swung to the next building, laughing to himself under the mask.
~~~
“Hey cutie!” Deadpool said, suddenly at Peter’s side and the brunette blinked owlishly at him.
“Me?” He asked and Deadpool laughed and pinched Peter’s cheek. “Course you! You heading to work?” He asked and Peter nodded.
“Yeah, time to deal with Jameson ranting about how evil Spiderman is for six hours.” Peter mumbled and fidgeted with his camera.
“So you don’t hate Spiderman?” Deadpool asked and Peter shook his head. “No, whyd you think that?”
“Well, you work for the Daily Bugle and they kinda hate my sweetie there!” Deadpool croons.
Peter smiled at that as they walked, gathering a few stares since Peter was this dorky photographer and Deadpool was a known murderer.
“Are you and Spiderman a thing?” Peter asked and Deadpool sighed loudly. “I wish!” He whined. “Why do you ask?”
“Just wondering if I need to start getting photos of the two of you together. Give Jameson another reason to hate the spider.” Peter joked and Deadpool laughed.
“Whooo! Thatd be something! Maybe I should start telling people we’re together. See how many people I can piss off. Maybe Stark would be mad, even my man Charles who knows!” Deadpool rambled and then paused.
“Well this is you! Have fun at work Bambi!” Deadpool said and ran off.
Peter smiled as he watched him run away and entered work.
“PARKER I NEED MORE PICTURES OF SPIDERMAN!”
~~~
“Hey ‘Pool, what’re you doing?” Spiderman asked, leaning over Deadpool’s shoulder to see what he was doing.
“Jacking off,” Deadpool said as he stood up, holding out a card. “I’m making something for that other cutie I was talking about.”
Spiderman froze for a moment and looked at the card. It was a very crude drawing of Peter with scrambled text above it asking for a date.
“If you want to ask people out, just ask them normally.” Spiderman said and Deadpool was silent for a moment, presumably listening to the boxes.
“He’s still my Spidey!” Deadpool whined and Spiderman didnt interject at that moment.
“Bambi is cute too!” “So his name is Bambi?” Spiderman asked and Deadpool straightened.
“Well his name is Peter. I call him Bambi. Only me.” Deadpool said and Peter chuckled as Deadpool’s possessiveness took over (as per usual). “And I want to ask him out but don’t worry Webs, you’ve still got place in my heart!”
Spiderman groaned as Deadpool hugged him, pushing him back. “Isnt this only going to be the third time youve spoken to him? Isn’t asking him out rushing it?”
Its also something Spiderman doesnt want him to do. As Spiderman he could tell Deadpool valid reasons why he didnt want to date, (I’m a hero, its dangerous, I dont have time, we need to focus on work) but as Peter he couldnt say much that would deter Deadpool from making advances (not that he ever stopped on Spidermans account).
And besides, sure, maybe Soiderman had feelings for Deadpool. But it was too much to risk.
But… maybe having him as Peter was fine? If Deadpool only knew him as Peter, wheres the harm? He wouldn’t know, he wouldnt be able to be used against his will.
Spiderman listened as Deadpool rambled on about how cute Peter was and how this is a way to get to know him better.
Maybe it could work.
~~~
“Parker, you’ve got a guest.” Jameson barked out and Peter looked up from where he was developing photos. “Who?” He asked.
Jameson just scoffed and walked away.
Peter knew full well who it was but played dumb as he stripped himself of his dark room equipment, pushing his glasses up and walking to the (fixed) front entrance.
Deadpool leaned against the wall with a rose in his hand and Peter walked up to him.
“Hi?” He greeted nervously and Deadpool straightened.
“Bambi! Hi! Go on a date with me!” Deadpool asked and Peter blinked, having to hold back laughter from how out the gate he was. “A date?” He asked.
“Yes! You and me! Theres a cool movie playing nearby we could watch!” Deadpool said handing Peter the rose. “After your work gets done in two hours.”
Peter almost dropped the flower at that and looked at him. “How do you know when my work ends?” He asked and Deadpool looked confused.
“That second time we met up! Its was almost noon and you said you end work at six, I figured a photographer for a newspaper probably a consistent schedule. It was more a guess than observation.” Deadpool answered.
Right, Peter forgot that Deadpool was scary in that way. Scary with how much he just knew sometimes.
“Oh, well, you’re right. Uh, sure.” Peter tried to play the innocent stranger character, but it was hard when he’s known Wade for over six years now.
“Really? Awesome!!!! I gotta rub it in Spidey’s face! I’ll pick you up after work, see you!” Deadpool ran off and Peter looked down at the rose.
This was going to be interesting.
~~~
It has been three weeks since Deadpool and Peter started dating.
And while Spiderman was glad that he proved to himself he could be with someone, it only made Deadpool more of a struggle to deal with at work.
“Oh ehm gee!” Deadpool said as Spiderman swung through the town, Deadpool running on top of buildings to keep up, screaming at Spiderman as he talked.
“Thats his job! Mm, I wish he was working right now so I could stop and say hi!” Deadpool gushed and Spiderman rolled his eyes.
“We’re working right now, ‘Pool.” Spiderman said and Deadpool laughed joyously. “Youll understand one day Baby Boy!”
Spiderman landed on the building next to Deadpool and the red anti hero grinned under his mask.
“You gonna TMNT it with me?” Deadpool asked and Spiderman chuckled. “What?” He asked.
“TMNT? Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles? Only one of the best shows and comics ever?” Deadpool went silent in that way when he was listening to the boxes and Spiderman waited while he did (he never heard Spidey like this anyway so what was the point).
“Hes not lame, just not cultured! Im sure Bambi would know it.” Deadpool said and Spiderman pushed his index finger to the bridge of his nose absentmindedly but Deadpool watched the movement.
“No, of course not!” Deadpool said and Spiderman walked in circles as he waited for Deadpool to finish. “Whatever! I’m working!” Deadpool yelled.
“You done?” Spiderman asked and Deadpool nodded.
“Come on! Lets go fight some bad guys!”
~~~
Peter was limping as he left work. Last night he had been shot in the leg, nothing fatal and he healed fast, but it still hurt.
Deadpool joined him halfway and worried immediately.
“Bambi! Are you okay?” He asked and Peter nodded. “Yeah, just walked into the corner of a desk. It was sharp. I should be fine.”
Deadpool scooped Peter up in his arms and Peter laughed loudly at that. “Hey Wade,” Peter said and Deadpool smiled.
“Hey Petes. So, does your leg feel fine enough to go out for dinner, or would you rather go back to my place and we can cuddle and watch movies?” Deadpool asked and Peter sighed happily.
“Lets go to yours.” Peter said and Deadpool nodded, running to his place quickly.
“Oh WEEEE! You’re lying!” Deadpool said suddenly. The boxes. Peter didn’t say anything as Deadpool thought.
“Nah, I would’ve caught in by now!” Deadpool said. Suddenly, he looked at Peter, white eyes of his mask wide and Peter shot him a strange look.
“What, do I have something on my face?” He asked and Deadpool shook his head. “Nope! Youre all good Bambi!”
And then they were at Deadpool’s house
~~~
Deadpool had been weirdly observant recently. Constantly pointing out things that Spiderman didn’t know he knew.
“You live in Queens, right?” Deadpool asked and Spiderman blinked.
“What?” He asked, he was sure he was good at keeping his location a secret.
“Its just, you always leave in a different way, to throw me off I guess? But everytime I get to a villain sight first, you always come from the same way. So I just put together you lived in Queens.” Deadpool informed.
“Oh,” Spiderman said.
~~~
It wasn’t just a Spiderman thing either, he did it too Peter.
“Youre broke, aren’t you?” He asked one day while they were cuddling on Wade’s couch and he looked taken aback.
“What? No!” He lied and Deadpool shrugged.
“Sorry, I just noticed how you always walk to work despite it being a bit of a walk, even though theres a subway stop from the end of your street to the Daily Bugle. And you’re all goody two shoes so you probably wouldnt hop.” Deadpool said and Peter hummed.
“I don’t like saying broke.” Peter informed. “There are people worse off than me.”
“Doesnt mean you can’t say broke.” Wade replied easily.
~~~
One day, Deadpool suddenly distanced himself. It was weird.
He didn’t show up for normal patrolling with Spiderman and he missed his and Peter’s lunch date.
Panic spread through his chest isntantly. Was he in trouble?
Peter tried calling him but no answer.
Spiderman went to his house but no one was home.
It didnt soothe the panic at all.
Spiderman sat on top of their normal building that they ate tacos at while on patrol and was breathing heavily, chest wheezing as he tried fo calm himself down.
“He’s probably fine. He can’t die, and he can get out of things quick. Hes smart. Its fine! Everything is fine!” Spiderman reassured himself out loud (something May said would help his anxieties).
“What’s fine?” A voice asked and Spiderman jumped to his feet, looking at Deadpool and he sighed in relief.
“Holy shit, I couldn’t find you anywhere I thought something happened.” Spiderman said and Deadpool stared at him blankly.
“Did you just curse?” He asked, voice not as light hearted as normal but Spiderman nodded.
“Yeah, where were you?” Spiderman asked and Deadpool shrugged.
“I just realized something is all.” Deadpool said and Spiderman frowned at that. “Realize what?” He asked and Deadpool stepped forward a bit, making Spidermans heart race.
“Am I a game to you?” Deadpool asked and Spiderman blinked. “What? No, why do you ask?”
Deadpool gave him a once over and sighed. “You know, I’m a pretty observant man by nature, I tend to figure things out real quick.”
Spiderman got an uneasy feeling but nodded. “Yeah, I’ve noticed.”
“Sure you did, Peter.” Deadpool said and Spiderman went ramrod straight.
He knew
How did he know?
“How did-“ “You both live in Queens, you both wear glasses but Peter’s glasses dont have lenses. You both are patient when the boxes are talking, something I never even told Peter but he was still aware of it. I accidentally called Peter “Baby Boy” but you still reacted like I called you Bambi. Also your ass, its pretty identifiable.” Peter blushed at that.
“How long have you known?” Peter asked and Deadpool shrugged.
“Ive suspected for a while, the boxes even longer. I knew when I found out you were broke.” Deadpool said and sighed. “Is this some weird game to you? You date me in civilian form with no strings attatched so I stop flirting with you during work? Or was it just to mess with me? You’d break up with me and then Spiderman would make fun of me? What was it?”
Spiderman felt his chest get tight and it felt hard to breathe so he pulled off his mask.
Deadpool looked taken aback by it but there was no use hiding if he already knew.
“Its wasn’t- Wade. People around me get hurt, all the time. I lost my boss, my girlfriend, my best friend, my uncle, everyone who’s ever known I was Spiderman, anyone I’ve ever loved, they all get hurt in the end. I- I was selfish. I wanted you, but Spiderman can’t have you. I figured if I was with you in civilian form, then things would be fine… I should’ve just told you the truth but- but now you’re gonna get hurt- you are hurt, because of me.”
Deadpool grabbed Spiderman into a hug and held him tightly. “Oh no, Baby Boy, no, I can’t get hurt, you know that! I can’t die! I won’t- listen, I won’t ever leave you, okay?”
Spiderman gripped the back of his suit tightly and let out a weak sob. “I know, I just didnt want to risk it.”
Wade cooed a bit. “You really love me,” he mumbled in disbelief and Peter nodded.
“I do, I love you.” It was the first time he’s said it out loud but he wants to say it more. The words start tumbling from his lips.
“I love you, I love you, I love you,” Peter said and Deadpool squeezed Peter impossibly tight.
“I love you too Baby Boy. Aww, my cute little Bambi!”
Peter doesnt know how ling they stayed there, just hugging, but he wouldnt change it for anything.