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“I’ll catch you up. I need a piss.” Remus Lupin called over his shoulder to his friends as he pushed open the door to the boy’s loo in the dungeon. Remus was just washing his hands when he heard a loud sniff. Drying off his hands, he called out, “Hello? Is anyone there?”
“Go away Lupin!” The words were growled out, but Remus recognized the voice as belonging to a Slytherin year-mate, Severus Snape. He didn’t have a lot to do with Snape, but two of his friends seemed to live for torturing the other boy. Remus walked up to the closed stall door when he heard more sniffing.
“Snape? Did Sirius and James prank you again?”
“No. Now GO AWAY!” Remus dropped his bookbag and sighed. He could practically smell the fear and upset and….blood. Remus smelled blood.
“Are you alright? I can go get Slughorn…or maybe one of the prefects? Or, uh, I know you’re friendly with Lily Evans. I can go get her if you want?”
“NO!” Remus stared helplessly at the door. He knew that potions would be starting soon, but he also knew his friends would cover for him if he wasn’t there, and Slughorn was so inept he probably wouldn’t even notice.
“Snape, I can tell something is wrong. Please open the door so I can help you?” There was a sigh, then,
“It’s not locked.”
“Oh.” Remus pushed open the stall door and found Severus on the floor leaning against the wall. His robes were open and his knees were drawn to his chest. His knees were bare, and he was wearing knee socks and buckled shoes. His chin was resting on his knees and his shoulder-length black hair was curtained across his face. Remus noticed that Severus was wearing a knee-length pleated skirt and his shirt – which resembled a blouse more than a shirt – was open, exposing small breasts. Remus let out a small gasp.
“Did….someone do this to you?” Remus dropped to his knees next to Severus and reached forward. Severus flinched.
“Don’t touch me!” Remus recoiled.
“I…I wasn’t. I was only going to close your shirt so you didn’t hang out. I’m sure we can reverse the spell.” Severus let out another sniff.
“It’s not….it’s not a spell.” Remus’ eyes went wide.
“I…ah….oh.”
“Very eloquent,” Severus sneered.
“Sorry.” Remus took in Severus closer, and he still smelled blood. “Are you…hurt?”
“No…I mean…I’ll be alright.” Severus raised his head and rubbed his fists against his eyes. Remus gave him a small smile.
“Can I help you?” Severus snorted.
“Not unless you can suddenly make my body….never mind.” Remus reached out his arm and gently rested it behind Severus’ back, giving him a half hug. To his surprise, Severus didn’t push him off.
“Do you want to talk about it?” Severus sighed.
“Do you ever feel like….like your body isn’t your own? Like there’s something wrong with it?” Remus grimaced.
“All the time.” Severus looked at him sharply.
“What?” Remus took a deep breath.
“Promise not to tell anyone?” Severus nodded, and Remus continued. “I’m not…I’m not supposed to tell anyone, but I was bit by a werewolf when I was four and I’ve….I’ve been a werewolf ever since.” Remus wasn’t expecting Severus to suddenly reach out to hug him, in fact he had expected the opposite, but he soon found himself with a lapful of Severus Snape.
“Oh, Lupin, I’m so sorry. I….I was reading in a potions journal about a potion being developed…maybe it will help. But,” he said with a sigh, “There isn’t a potion to help me. At least, not one that I’ve heard of yet.”
“Do you want to talk about it?”
“I suppose it’s only fair. When I was born….my parents were told by the doctor that I was a girl. But….I’m not. I’m a boy. Only now…”
“You feel like your body is betraying you?” Severus nodded.
“How did you know? I mean, I guess you do know being a werewolf, but…” Remus nodded.
“While it’s true that I feel like my body betrays me every time there is a full moon, I meant, I know what you’re feeling because I know someone like you.” Severus’ eyes went wide.
“You do?” Remus nodded.
“I don’t think he’ll mind me telling you, as long as you keep it a secret. You know how I have a twin brother?” Severus snorted. Everyone knew who Rory Lupin was. In fact, it was hard sometimes to realise Rory and Remus were related, let alone twins, as Rory was far more outgoing than Remus. Remus grinned. “Right. Stupid question. Well, when we were born, they told my parents they had a boy and a girl.”
“So Rory?”
“Yeah. So, I kinda have gone though a lot with Rory. So how come you’re wearing a girls uniform and why is it all ripped up?” Tears welled up in Severus’ eyes and he turned his head away from Remus.
“My mother and father…wanted a girl. So mother buys my school uniforms and da calls me his little girl….and today my body reminded me that it’s the wrong body because I started to bleed. I bled all over my bed and my roommates noticed. I tried to hide it but they….” Severus paused and wiped at his nose. Remus pulled a handkerchief out of his pocket and Severus smiled in thanks as he blew his nose. “They went and told Mulciber.”
“Isn’t he the seventh year Slytherin prefect?” Severus nodded. “Did he?”
“He, uhm….used a cutting curse on my robes and my shirt and he….” Severus crossed his arms over his chest, as if to protect himself. “He grabbed at these, then looked under my skirt.”
“Severus…can I call you Severus?” Severus nodded. “Severus did he touch you under your skirt?”
“I think he wanted to,” Severus whispered, “But he said he doesn’t….doesn’t….” Severus bit his lip against the sob that was forming. “He said he didn’t do girls on the rag, but I should expect him when it’s done.” Remus’ eyes flashed with anger.
“No. I’ll go to Dumbledore if I have to. Mulciber WILL NOT touch you.” Severus was shocked at the venom behind Remus’ words, but he though that Remus might have been picturing his brother in the same situation.
“I don’t want to tell anyone. Please.”
“You can’t stay there with the threat of rape. I know, you’ll move into my dorm.” Severus snorted with laughter.
“Into Gryffindor? With Black and Potter? First of all, McGonagall would never let me. Second of all, I don’t want either of them knowing! Are you out of your mind?” Remus smirked.
“There were too many Gryffindor boys this year for one room. Sirius and James are sharing a room with Peter and Frank. Rory and I have our own room. And I know Rory can help you. Starting with…” Remus gently removed Severus from his lap and he stood up. he removed his robes and unbuckled his trousers.
“Hey! I’m not going to fuck you, either. And I don’t suck cock.” Remus rolled his eyes.
“I was going to give you my trousers.” Severus blushed.
“Oh. But what will you wear?”
“Your skirt.”
“Uh….” Remus laughed and finished removing his trousers, which he passed to Severus.
“It’s fine. Rory used to make me trade school uniforms with him when we were kids. Used to confuse the teachers, too. I’m used to wearing a skirt. It’s fine. Besides, we only need to get back to the tower. Do you need my shirt, too? Yours looks a bit, ah, shredded. I’ll turn around.” Remus turned his back to Severus and removed his own shirt, holding it over his shoulder. Severus stared at the huge mark on his new friend’s shoulder.
“Remus, is that…” Remus flushed and Severus could see his back turning pink.
“Yeah. I try not to get changed in front of anyone other than Rory. Sorry.” He heard fabric rustling and then Severus told him he could turn around. There was an unfortunate gap in the buttons right across Severus’ chest and Severus sighed.
“They’ll only get bigger. Me Ma’s huge.” Remus gave him a sympathetic smile.
“Come with me to my dorm. Rory can help you.”
“Ok.” Remus looked at Severus’ torn blouse.
“I wish I knew mending spells, but I’ll just have to put my jumper on.” He stuffed Severus’ torn blouse into his bag and pulled out his pullover. “I bet one of the older girls can fix this…and your robes.”
“Umm…Ok.” Remus held out his hand and Severus tentatively took it and gave Remus a small smile when he tugged on his hand.
“Come on. Classes are in session, so no one should be in the halls. We’ll have to be sneaky to get around Filch.” Remus gave Severus’ hand a squeeze. “But I did find a shortcut that goes from the second floor to the seventh, so we can use that.” Severus squeezed Remus’ hand back and the two boys left the toilet for Gryffindor tower.
###
“Rory usually comes back after potions before Lunch,” Remus pointed to one of the beds. “That’s my bed. You can sit if you want? I dunno what you want to do until Rory gets here. Ummm….” Severus gingerly perched on the edge of the bed Remus pointed to.
“I can study, I don’t mind. I had potions yesterday if you want to see my notes.” Remus smiled.
“Yeah, that would be a help. I’m a little….hopeless in potions. But I hear you’re brilliant?”
“Uhm, well…” Severus blushed and Remus had to stamp on his heart for thudding gently at the sight.
"Lily said you and her used to make potions with your mum and you were top of out year, probably even the whole school. She said that you were already looking at taking your OWL this year so you could take your NEWT early and start a mastery?” If it was possible, Severus blushed deeper.
“Lily doesn’t know when to keep her mouth shut,” he grumbled.
“But it’s true?”
“Yeah.” Remus grinned.
“Brilliant. I always wanted to be friends with a potions master!”
“Friends? You want to be friends?” Severus didn’t have any friends other than Lily. He had tried in Slytherin, but since he wasn’t a pure blood, he generally was looked down on, especially now that Lucius Malfoy had graduated the previous year. Lucius’ grandmother had been a Prince, and so they were distantly related and he had looked out for the younger boy. And Black and Potter had tortured him so much that no Ravenclaw or Hufflepuff wanted to be seen with him. Remus smiled at Severus.
“Yeah. Friends.” Remus stretched out on his bed next to Severus. “Maybe even…best friends?”
“Aren’t you best friends with Black and Potter? Or your Twin?” Remus patted the bed next to him and Severus stretched out, rolling to his side to look at Remus.
“Nah. I mean, Rory knows everything about me and we share everything, but I’m only friends with James and Sirius because we’re all in Gryffindor together and the prefect in our first year kinda implied that we all had to get along. But I think they’re a little mean, to be honest. I’d rather spend my time with Rory, Frank, and Lily. Mary’s alright, too. But Marlene is a bitch and Alice is really quiet.”
Severus grinned and then felt pain in his abdomen and he doubled over, shooting up and off of Remus’ bed.
“Sev?”
“Remus, I might get blood on your bed! Oh no, what if I got blood on your trousers?!” Remus got up and fished around in Rory’s trunk, coming up with the dreaded contraption women and girls used when they had their period.
“I don’t know how to use this, you’ll have to ask Rory or Lily, but uhm. I think you wear it around your waist and then you attach one of these to the clips?” Remus shoved one of the sanitary towels and the belt at Severus. “Rory and I have our own bathroom. Oh, you probably need clean underwear. Do you want a pair of boxers? They’re clean, I promise.” Remus held out a pair of plain blue boxers and Severus took them, blushing.
“Thanks.”
Severus entered the small bathroom as tears welled up in his eyes once again. No one had ever treated him with so much compassion before, not even Lily. He glanced around the bathroom and jumped when he heard Remus’ voice though the door tell him it was ok if he wanted to take a shower…and he did. He felt gross and disgusting as he peeled his soaked underwear away from his body and threw them in the magical hamper that would send them down to the laundry room.
After his shower, he tossed the towel into the hamper and set to try to figure out the contraption Remus had passed him, and realised he would need to somehow procure these items himself and wondered how much it cost and if he could somehow transfigure something if he couldn’t afford it….or he’d have to tutor another Hufflepuff. He grimaced. He didn’t particularly like tutoring, but it earned him decent pocket money, especially with trips to Hogsmeade starting. He usually earned enough money to have a single butterbeer and to purchase a few potions ingredients or periodical. He would just have to skip the butterbeer next time.
He finally figured out how the thing worked, and he slid on Remus’ boxers, only slightly blushing at wearing something so intimate that belonged to someone else. He realised how comfortable the boxers were, much more comfortable than the serviceable knickers his mother would buy for him. He wondered if there was a transfiguration spell for that, too.
It turned out that he hadn’t leaked onto Remus’ trousers, so he re-dressed in the borrowed clothing and clutched his ripped cloak to his chest as he exited the bathroom. Remus had taken the time to change out of Severus’ skirt and had folded the skirt and placed it on top of Severus’ bag. He looked over at Severus and smiled.
“Bet you feel better now. Showers always make me feel better. Here, hand me your robe and I’ll see if I can get Martha to fix it for you. She’s our seventh year prefect.” Severus held out the faded bundle of cloth.
“She won’t mind that I’m in Slytherin?” Remus shook his head.
“No? Why should she?” Remus gathered the robe. “Be back in a tick!”
Severus sat down at one of the desks in the room, not knowing if it belonged to Remus or Rory and flipped through the top text book. It was their Transfiguration text, and Severus settled into reading the next chapter, resisting the urge to make notes in the margin since it wasn’t his own book. He had just turned to the chapter beyond their assigned reading when the door opened and Remus came in followed by a tall girl with long brown curls. She was wearing her usual uniform, but instead of the grey jumper trimmed in house colours, she was wearing a bright gold jumper.
“Hi, I’m Martha. Remus said you needed some help repairing your robe?” Severus nodded and the girl continued. “What happened? If a student did this to you as a joke, they deserve a detention or two as it’s against the rules to deface another student’s belongings.” Severus snorted.
“Maybe in Gryffindor.” Martha gave Severus a sharp look.
“Who’s your prefect? Mulciber?” Severus gave an involuntary shudder and Remus moved closer to him and gently wrapped his own robe over Severus’ shoulders. Martha noticed and she frowned. “Mulciber should be looking out for you.” Severus snorted again.
“Not likely. Not after Lucius Malfoy graduated last year.” Martha pursed her lips.
“Really? No, that won’t do. I’ll have to speak with the Head Boy and Girl about this….” Martha started muttering to herself about incompetent prefects and Severus panicked.
“No, please. It’s….fine. Can you fix my robe or not?”
“Course I can.” Martha took the garment from Remus and a quick mending spell had it looking, well, not like new, but at least it was no longer ripped.
“Thanks.” Martha nodded and looked around the dormitory.
“Remus asked if you could transfer here. You won’t be allowed to transfer into Gryffindor, but there’s no reason why you can’t request to room with your friend and sleep here. You would still be expected to earn points for Slytherin, and possibly eat at the Slytherin table on feast days, but, there’s room for a third bed. Just need to speak with McGonagall and Slughorn.”
“Will they want to know why?” Martha shrugged.
“I don’t know. We haven’t had a dorm transfer since I was a firstie and it was a younger sibling who wanted to be in the same dorm as their older sibling.” Remus grinned at Severus.
“You can be our triplet!”
“Who’s going to be our triplet?” Rory asked as he entered his room and wondered what the prefect was doing in his room and then his eyebrows rose when he saw Severus sitting at his brother’s desk. “Er – Snape? What are you doing here?”
“Um….” began Remus. Martha looked between the three third years and she rolled her eyes.
“Right. I’ll just be back in the common room if you need me again. I’m happy to take you to see McGonagall later.” She closed the door behind her and Remus sank down onto his bed and glanced at his twin.
“Roar….uhm…Snape…Sev….Severus is….like you. And uhm…he needs your help?” Rory raised his eyebrows once more at his brother and wished they had developed twin telepathy, but unfortunately, they had never managed to send more than an emotion to each other. In this instance, Rory could tell Remus was hopeful. Rory just rolled his eyes at his brother.
“Fine. Now, get out Remy.”
“Wha? Why?” Rory gave Remus an unimpressed look.
“If we’re going to talk about….stuff…I think it would be a little embarrassing for Sna…Do we call you Severus now?” Severus nodded. “Right. I think it might embarrass Severus if you stayed.” Severus shook his head.
“Can Remus stay?” Rory shrugged.
“Fine, but if Remus gets squeamish or you feel uncomfortable with him here, he leaves. Deal?” Both boys nodded and Rory soon had Severus settled on his bed as the two talked, with little input from Remus. Remus had to close his bed curtains once when Rory started explaining about binders and offered to give Severus his training binder and to show him how it was worn.
Severus was overjoyed when Rory explained to him there was a potion he could make that would prevent menstruation, but it needed to be taken on the first day of his cycle, so he would need to make the potion that day if he wanted to prevent menstruating the following month. Severus blushed when he told Rory that Remus had given him items out of the other transwizard’s trunk, but Rory just waved his hand.
“It’s fine. I’m glad Remus is the one who found you.” Rory smiled at Severus and Severus smiled back.
“Me too.”
Remus still had his curtains drawn and Rory winked at Severus. “Let’s jump on Remy. One, two….” By the time he said three, he was pulling the curtains open and had launched himself onto the bed and on top of his brother, who let out a loud oof.
“Ugh, Rory. We’re getting too big for this.” Suddenly, Severus found his courage and he jumped onto the bed, pining Remus down further. “Hi, Sev.”
Severus blushed. “H….hi.” Rory looked between the other two boys and extracted himself.
“Right. I don’t want to be a third wheel. I’ll leave you two alone. By the way, I approve. Both of Sev and of his moving into our dorm. So….have fun!” Remus sputtered after his brother.
“Rory! I don’t. I mean, we’re not. Um….” Rory rolled his eyes.
“I’ve known you liked boys since we were nine. Besides, if you have a Slytherin boyfriend, then you can’t complain about me dating a Ravenclaw.”
“Who?”
“Kingsley Shacklebot.” Remus smiled at the dreamy look on his brother’s face.
“He’s a nice guy. I approve.”
“Great! I’m going to go snog him. I suggest you snog your Slytherin. Toodle-doo, brother dear!” Rory shuffled out of the dorm and closed the door, placing a silencing charm on the door and a light locking charm, just to keep other students out of their room.
Severus suddenly realised he was laying on top of Remus, and was pinning the other boy down to the bed with his weight. He went to roll off of Remus, but Remus moved his arms to circle Severus’ waist and he smiled at the other boy.
“Umm…..I think you’re cute. I kinda thought you were cute since last year.”
“Really?” Severus turned pink once more and Remus chuckled.
“You’re cute when you blush, and you’ve blushed a lot today….but I think I have, too.” Remus moved his hand to push some of Severus’ hair out of his face. “Can I kiss you?”
“Y-yeah. I mean yes. You can kiss me.” Severus was flustered. No one had ever called him cute before, and if he was honest, he thought Remus was cute, too. Even though Rory looked like Remus, he still thought Remus was the more attractive twin. Remus grinned and moved his hand to the back of Severus’ head and pulled the shorter boy’s face closer to his and he captured his lips in what would be the first of many kisses exchanged by the pair.
###FIN###