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"That’s enough Ace!” You yell as you run across the street. “Let him go!”
Ace Merrill, local gang leader and world-class jerk, was currently pinning your little brother to the ground.
“Aw, how sweet--is big sister here to rescue you?” Ace taunts your brother as he holds a lit cigarette up to his face.
“Beat it y/n; this is none of your business.” Richie, your older brother, says as you approach.
“Of course it's my business when your friend is threatening our little brother!" You snap. "Now get off him Ace! I'm not kidding around here." You warn, looking down at the blonde. He smirks.
"Oh yeah?” He says, standing up to look you in the eyes. “You gonna do something about it sweetheart?" You stare him down as Chris, now free, jumps up and goes to stand by his friend Gordie. Ace smirks as you glare at him, and you roll your eyes as you turn to your brother, checking him over for any injuries.
"You okay?" You ask, hand going up to push back the wisps of hair on his forehead as you look over his face for any cuts or burns. He quickly pushes your hand away.
"I'm fine y/n, stop fussing." Chris says, though there isn’t much fight in it. You sigh as you look down at him, looking far more mature and world-weary than any 12 year old should. Your concern for you brother ebbed, it was quickly replaced with a tide of anger. You put your hands on your hips as you turn to Ace and Ritchie.
“Uh oh Eyeball--I think she’s mad at us.” Ace jokes as Ritchie laughs. You scowl.
“What’s wrong with the two of you, huh? Do you get off on picking on a couple kids that can’t fight back or what?” You ask as you scowl at them.
“Listen Y/N, my friend here was only politely askin’ Chris to take back an insult he so rudely threw Ace's way. That’s all.” Richie replied, smirking as he places his arm on Ace’s shoulder.
“You know you should really teach that brother of yours some manners y/n.” Ace adds with a smirk.
“That’s bullshit!” Chris says behind you, and you turned to look at him. “I called him an asshole because he stole Gordie’s hat!” You turn back around and see the hat in question, now sitting on top of Ritchie’s curly head. “Gordie’s brother gave him that hat! They can't have it!” Chris adds, and your frown deepens. Everyone knew what happened to Dennis Lachance; that hat probably meant a lot to his little brother.
“Eyeball, did you see me steal anything?” Ace asks Richie with a smirk.
“No way Ace--the kid gave it to you.” Ritchie responds.
“That’s a lie!” Gordie yells as he stares daggers at Ace.
“This is ridiculous; just give the hat back Ritchie.” You say as you move to take the hat off your bother’s head. Ace snatches it before you have the chance.
“Now hold on a minute,” Ace says as he holds the hat up just above your reach. “The kid gave me this hat--it’s mine, fair and square.”
“Stop fooling around and just give me the hat Ace.” You say as you jump up to snatch it from his hand. He moves it away from you at the last second as he smiles. He leans forward, invading your space.
“What’ll you give me for it?” He asks, looking you over with his icy blue eyes. You glare back at him.
“You know damn well I don’t have anything to give you.” You say, annoyed beyond the point of caring about manners.
“Oh--hardly ladylike of you y/n, cursing at me like that.” Ace replies sarcastically.
“Shut up and just tell me what you want.” You shoot back. He laughs.
“Feisty as always I see.” He smiles. “I like that.” He holds the hat out to you. “Go out with me tonight and you can have it.” The two of you stare each other down, while Ritchie looks over at his friend in surprise.
“Hey come on Ace--that’s gross man, she’s my sister!" Ritchie says, looking horrified at the idea.
“Don’t do it y/n--who knows what he’ll do to you.” Chris pleads behind you. You and Ace ignore them as you glare at him and he stares back with a crooked grin on his face.
“Fine.” You agree.
“Y/N!” Chris exclaims in shock. Ace's smile widens with satisfaction.
“But you give Gordie his hat back now.” You add.
“If I give the kid the hat now, how will I know you’ll hold up your end of the deal?” Ace asks.
“Unlike some people, I’m not a lier.” You say. He stares back at you, before laughing.
“Alright, deal.” He says, offering you the hat which you quickly grab from his hand. “I’ll pick you up at 8.” He says as he turns to walk away; Ritchie looking between you and Ace before he runs off to join his friend.
You glare at their retreating backs until they turn the corner. You turn to Chris and Gordie, both of them looking at you mournfully. You smile at them, offering the hat to Gordie.
“Here, I think this is yours.” He looks down as he takes the hat from you.
“You didn’t have to do that.” He says as he hugs the hat close to his chest.
“You know usually, when someone does something nice for you, you thank them.” You say, smiling as you lightly ruffle his hair.
“R-right. Sorry--I mean, thank you.” He says, putting the hat back on his head with a small smile.
“What were you thinking y/n?” Chris cuts in, clearly upset. “You know what that asshole could do to you?” He asks, looking at you with concern. You just smile back.
“You don’t have to try and protect me Chris--I’m the big sister, remember?” You remind him. “Listen, don’t worry about Ace; I can handle him.”
“But--!” He tries to argue.
“That’s enough now.” You cut him off. “I’m a Chambers--we’re made of tougher stuff, right?” He sighs, looking at the ground.
“Yeah.” He agrees, before lifting his head. “Just promise me you’ll be careful.” You laugh.
“I promise.” You say. “Now, it looks like you two have somewhere to be.” You say, eyeing their sleeping bags. “Go have fun, and don’t worry so much.”
You watch them leave as Chris waves back at you. You return the wave, watching them until they were out of sight. The boys no longer visible, you let out a long sigh.
You pinched the bridge of your nose, wondering just exactly what you’d gotten yourself into, before turning on your heels and heading for home.
It was all well and good to say you that you’d be fine--it was another thing entirely to actually back that up. You'd know Ace for a long time, and while you didn't think he would do anything to you, there was always that lingering chance you were wrong.
--
That evening you lie to your parents and say you’re going with a friend to the movies, before leaving to wait a little ways down the road. You didn’t even want to think about what your dad would do if he found out you were going out with a boy--especially one like Ace.
While you're thinking about the potential consequences of getting caught in a lie while also being out with a boy, the boy in question pulls up next to you on the street. Surprisingly, he's on time.
“So excited you couldn’t even wait inside, huh y/n?” He asks with a smile. You roll your eyes.
“Cute.” You reply sarcastically as you get in the passengers seat. “You know my dad; he would kill us both if he saw me leaving with you.”
“He could try.” Ace jokes, though you had a feeling it was said more genuinely than he let on.
“Let’s just go before anyone sees us.” You reply.
“Yes ma’am.” He says, driving off into the night.
--
Neither of you say much on your way to the diner. Your thoughts drifted between how much trouble you’d be in if Ace didn't get you back at a decent time, and thoughts of Ace himself. You’d know him for a long time--before he was Ace. Back then he was just John; the troubled kid from school your brother palled around with.
You were younger than Chris is now when you'd first met him. You were shy as a child, and you didn't understand why people treated you differently. Now you know of course--everyone knew the Chambers were a bad family. So there's no way your deadbeat dad could raise anything but deadbeat kids. The three of you were bad seeds going nowhere fast. As far as Castle Rock was concerned, you were all no good.
Since good mothers didn't like their kids hanging around with anyone from the Chambers family, you never did have many friends growing up. Instead, you followed Ritchie around like a duckling; despite his constant complaints about it.
And that's how you met Ace. He and your brother constantly picked on you or left you behind when they ran off to play, but you didn't care. You would take anything over being alone. And sometimes, in those rare moments when you and Ace were left alone together, you saw a different side of him. When he wasn't trying to act out for his friends, when he wasn't showing off or acting tough. He was almost vulnerable then, a bit unsure of himself, and more than anything you remember how sometimes, he could even be kind.
The moments were always so few and far between that every time it surprised you; that he could be nice to someone, and that the someone was always you. You wondered sometimes if anyone else had ever seen that side of him, or if those fleeting moments of sweetness were reserved just for you.
Now more than ever you wondered if that side of him was still buried somewhere inside him, or if he'd let it die along with his name--strangled down deep in the darkness of his heart.
--
You pull into the diner, the lights from it's neon sign washing the parking lot in a soft, red glow. Ace parks his convertible and a carhop quickly comes out to take your orders before hurrying back inside. Ace pulls out a pack of cigarettes and a lighter from the top pocket of his shirt as you turn to him.
"Okay, what's your game?" You ask point blank.
"What do you mean?" He asks, pulling a cigarette from the pack and placing it lightly between his lips before putting the pack away. He lights it, quickly snapping the lighter shut as he takes a long drag.
"I mean, what are you trying to accomplish from this?" You throw your arms out to vaguely gesturing around you. "Because if you think you'll be getting anything from me tonight you've got another thing coming." Ace throws his head back as he laughs, the cigarette glowing faintly between his fingers.
"I'm serious--I know you Ace Merrill, and when you're going with a girl you're only after one thing." You say as you look over at his profile. He takes another puff from his cigarette, slowly blowing out a cloud of smoke. He smiles at you as he ashes over the side of the car.
"Well damn, it sounds like you got me all figured out sweetheart." He says, smirking as he turns his head to look at you. "And yet you still agreed to come out with me tonight, so what do you know about that?" You scowl.
"I was coerced and you know it! Like I'd willingly agree to go out with you." You huff, crossing your arms as you slide down in your seat.
"Ouch--that's not a very nice thing to say y/n." He says sarcastically, still smiling.
"As if you have any room to talk." You snap back. "You're a jerk to everyone you meet."
"Funny, I don't recall ever being a jerk to you." He responds. You open your mouth to argue, then stop.
When was the last time he'd actually been mean to you? Had he ever, really? Sure, there was his general abrasive attitude and his sarcastic jokes--but had he ever, genuinely said something meant to hurt you?
"See, you can't think of anything. Admit it, I have always been good to you." He says, a triumph grin on his face.
"Good might be an exaggeration--and anyway that hardly matters. You not being a total jerk to one person doesn't change the fact that you're a bully to everyone else." You counter, sitting up as you speak. "I mean, just look at how you were treating my brother today!"
"Listen, the kid's gotta learn sometime how harsh life is; I'm doing him a favor teaching him how the world works." He says, flicking the butt of his cigarette out into the parking lot.
"A favor?" You repeat. "All you're doing is making life harder for a good kid who already has it hard enough." You slump back down as you sigh, looking down at the dashboard. "Trust me, he doesn't need a lesson about how hard life can be." You say more to yourself than to him.
Ace eyes you from the driver's seat, but before he can say anything the food arrives and the moment passes.
You eat your burgers and fries, talking about nothing in particular. Ace is his usual, rough self, but you grow a little more comfortable as you talk. Mostly you bicker back and forth, the whole conversation one small argument after another. Still, it wasn't an uncomfortable atmosphere to be in.
You talked to Ace less now than you did as kids, but you fell back into step like you still spent everyday together. His usual goading and pestering, and in return your typical annoyed response. Maybe you seemed like you weren't enjoying the conversation, but in truth you didn't mind. If anything, as much as you would hate to admit it, you almost missed talking to him like this. Not worrying about his gang or your brother or whatever anyone else thought about it.
Just two old friends talking like they'd never lost touch in the first place--though you'd sooner swallow your own tongue than say any of that to his face.
--
After you finished eating Ace told you he wanted to take you somewhere. You were a little worried about the time--or where in God's name he was planning on taking you--but it's not like you really had a say in the matter. Ace pulled out of the diner and headed out of town without a word of input from you. He soon turned on a country road that started to go up, and before you knew it you were parked on a cliff side out in the wilderness. From your spot above the world, you could see the lights of Castle Rock surrounded by a blanket of darkness.
You scowl over at Ace.
"Are you serious? I told you--"
"Just shut up and get out of the car, would ya?" He says, jumping out the side of the convertible. He moves around and grabs a small metal cooler from the floorboards behind the driver's seat. You watch him suspiciously as he heads to the front of the car, getting up to sit on the hood.
"You coming or what?" He asks, looking back at you as he sets the cooler down.
"Fine--but you better not try anything funny." You warn, getting out of the car. You hop up on top of the hood, cautiously sliding up to the back. You pull your knees up and wrapping your skirt around your legs, hugging them to your chest.
"Relax already. If I was gonna try something I would've done it in the car." He tells you as he opens the ice chest to grab a beer. He pulls out a Swiss Army knife and opens it up, using the bottle opener to pop the top off the bottle. He offers it to you, and--after a moment of contemplation--you slowly take it. He quickly works on getting himself one as you take a sip.
He takes a swig of his beer as he looked out over the scenery in front of you. It was a nice view. The two of you sat for awhile, just silently enjoying the scenery while you drank.
"Nice view, huh?" He says absently after a long while.
"Yeah, it is."
"No, I can't." You answer honestly.
"Reminds me just how small this town really is." He takes another drink from his beer as he talks. "Can you picture being somewhere like New York City? You could go all the way up in the tallest skyscraper they got and look out, and you would still never see the end of it. Can you imagine living somewhere that big? Where no one knows you?" He asks.
"There's trains that can take you further and faster than any car, boats that can take you around the world, and now they got planes that can fly you through the sky." He takes another drink. "All that, and I'm still gonna die in this shit town." He says, looking out over the lights of Castle Rock with contempt. You look over at him, staring quietly at his handsome face. You knew what he meant, how he felt. You felt it too.
"You don't have to. You could leave, go someplace else. Somewhere new." You say. He laughs through his nose.
"Yeah, go where?" He asks.
"Anywhere." You reply. He smiles, though there's no humor in it.
"Let's be real y/n; some people just weren't meant to leave." He finishes his beer as he smirks. "We both know the only way I'm getting out is behind six feet of concrete or laying six feet under--whichever comes first." He throws his bottle hard, and it disappears over the side of the rocks down into the trees.
You had never heard him be so introspective before. Then again, you felt similar. You were sure a lot of kids from Castle Rock did, but none of you talked about it so openly like this.
"Things don't have to be that way." You say quietly. "You could change--try to be better." He laughs.
"Yeah, sure. I'll get right on that." He replies sarcastically.
"You could!" You say with more force. "I have!" You say, turning away. "I mean, I'm trying." You say, sighing. You take a long, full drink of your beer, tossing the bottle out into the darkness.
"You think I want to be stuck here forever? Just to end up like my mom? Married to some piece of shit who beats me when he's angry, and he's always angry." You start to tear up, but you keep going; your eyes looking down at you knees. "Too afraid to leave, too afraid to stop him from taking it out on our kids. Always afraid, always hurting--miserable until the day I die. And then I still won't escape because they'll bury me in the dirt of this town where I'll be trapped forever, and a tombstone will be all that's left of me. The only reminder that I lived and died here--and for what?"
There were tears running down your face, which you quickly whipped away with the back of your sleeve. You looked back over at him, his face was a mask, hiding any hint of emotion.
"I refuse to let this place swallow me whole. I don't care what they say about my family--I'm going to be better. I'll get out of here even if it kills me, and then no one will tell me I'm no good ever again." You say with more resolve. He looks over at you for a long, quite moment, then cracks a smile.
"Listen, you point me to the assholes telling you that, and we'll just see how good they are at name-calling when they've got broken jaws." He jokes. You can't help but laugh in spite of yourself.
"You see? That's the kind of thing that's gonna get you in trouble." You reply, smiling over at him. He shrugs.
"What can I say? A tiger can't change his stripes."
"Tigers are still just cats you know. Yeah, they're big, but they're only fierce when they need to be. And just like house cats, they can also be sweet." He laughed at that.
"Yeah, just imagine me--sweet."
"You could be, if you tried." You say, smiling at him.
"Oh really? But I thought I was a jerk? Or was it a bully?." He says as he smiles over at you. You playfully punch his arm as he laughs.
"You are a jerk and a bully." You reply. "But I also know you can be nice if you really wanna be."
"Oh yeah? That's something you know, huh?" He says, leaning in a little. "And exactly who do I got to be nice to?"
"Well, you could try being nice to me." You answer.
"So, how exactly would you like me to be nice to you?" He asks, looking at you with a playful smirk.
"You could start by laying off my little brother and his friends." You say sweetly. He throws his head back as he laughs.
"Oh is that all?" He asks, looking back down at you. "And what exactly do I get if I do?"
"You're not supposed to expect a reward for being nice." You tell him. "But," You pause as you lean a little closer. "If you're nice to me, maybe I'll be nice to you." He smiles, his eyes glancing down to your lips.
"Oh, so that's how it's gonna be, huh?" He asks.
"Mhmm." You smile.
"You drive a hard bargain sweetheart, but," He leans forward. "You got yourself a deal."
You smile and close your eyes as you feel his lips meet yours. His hand moves up to cup your cheek as he deepens the kiss. Your heart was pounding like a drum in your chest and for a few, sweet moments, everything else disappeared. It was just you and Ace--no Castle Rock, no worries about the future, just the two of you together. Strange how a kiss with the right person can make you see stars, when all you saw before was the darkness.
You pull back and look at him.
"I mean it about the kids though--we're over if I find out after all this that you've still been giving them a hard time." You say. He rolls his eyes.
"Yeah I get it, I promise--now quit harping and come here." He said, pulling you to his chest as he leaned down to kiss you again.
You weren't sure what the future would look like for you or Ace; but you knew right here, right now, this is exactly where you wanted to be.