Chapter Text
Natasha isn’t home yet when you wake up for your 6 a.m. run. Both of you had been sent to Hawaii to gather intelligence on a new branch of HYDRA operations. Natasha spent most of the nights working, while you were given tasks to be completed during daylight. While you were on opposite schedules, the both of you tried to make the most of your time on the beautiful island of Oahu.
You head down to the beach, enjoying the sounds of the waves crashing along the shore. There’s not too many people out at this hour and the sun rising over the horizon is beautiful. As you run, listening to your own heartbeat and heavy breathing, you suddenly notice a small lump lying on the sand ahead.
You slow down to approach it. It looks like a shark, no heavier than 30 pounds, with four stubby legs protruding from its body. The way it’s curled up reminds you of the way a dog sleeps. When you kneel to poke it, the shark suddenly bounces awake and launches itself at you.
“ARGH!” You fall onto your back as the shark lands on your chest, a long slimy tongue poking out of its mouth and licking your face. “Hey, what the—” The shark sits back, opening its mouth in a wide, goofy smile, revealing multiple rows of jagged teeth. “What are you?”
The shark pants and growls, rolling off of you onto the sand. You stand up and he circles your heels, sniffing your legs like a dog. His finned tail wags back and forth.
“Aw, you’re kind of cute. Do you want to come home with me?” you ask.
The shark looks up to you and nods.
“My girlfriend’s gonna love you. She’s always wanted a pet,” you tell him. “But I have to give you a name first.” You think for a moment. “How about Jeff? You look like a Jeff.”
Jeff throws you another one of his goofy smiles and races ahead. You laugh at the way his four legs waddle to carry his bulky body. You’ve never seen anything like him, but you love him already.
He follows you all the way home, where you make yourself breakfast. You warm up a bowl of oatmeal with a sprinkle of protein powder and make a second bowl for Jeff. But when you place the bowl on the floor, he immediately turns his nose away from the oatmeal.
“It’s healthy!” you protest as he shakes his head. “Okay, fine. I guess you want something a little meatier?” You scrounge the cupboards until you find a few tins of canned salmon. You crank open two cans and dump them into a bowl for Jeff. He gobbles down every bite and licks his lips.
“Happy now? Okay, buddy. I have some work to do, but you’re free to roam the house. Let me go fill up the bathtub with some water for you. Although you seem to be doing fine on land.” Whatever species of shark Jeff is, he seems perfectly fine breathing oxygen.
You show him the bathroom and he sits by your side, watching as you fill the tub with water. He needs your help to hoist him into the tub, but sinks into the water, completely at ease, and closes his eyes.
“I’ll be in the living room if you need me.” You pat his top fin and hope that he understands what a living room is. He seems like an intelligent creature.
You turn on the television for some background noise and set your laptop on your legs. Less than half an hour later, Natasha opens the front door, dragging in her work bag.
“Good morning,” you say.
“Hi, baby.” She comes over to give you a quick kiss.
“Do you want me to make you breakfast?” you ask.
“No, I’m really tired. I think I’ll just shower and go to sleep,” she says, walking towards the bedroom.
“Okay.” You don’t even think twice, until you hear her scream.
“AIIEEEEEEE!”
“Jeff!” Your laptop drops to the floor as you scramble to get up and race into the bathroom. “Nat, don’t hurt Jeff!” you yell, skidding into the scene. Jeff has his front legs propped up on the edge of the tub, staring at Natasha with wide, curious eyes as she cowers against the wall.
“WHY IS THERE A SHARK IN THE BATHTUB?” Natasha screeches.
“His name is Jeff!” you say. “And he’s not really a shark, because he has legs, so—”
“WHY THERE IS A HALF-EVOLVED SHARK IN THE BATHTUB?”
“I found him on the beach when I went for my run this morning!” You scramble to calm Jeff from your terrified girlfriend, lifting him out of the bathtub. He settles into your arms with a grunt and rests his head on your shoulder. “Look how cute he is—”
Natasha has never been so angry and amused with you before. “We are not keeping him, Y/N—”
“Why not?” You’re certain Jeff can charm her the way he did to you. He looks at Natasha and smiles, but she is clearly not impressed. “You always said we could get a pet one day—”
“A SHARK IS NOT A PET!”
“Aw, come on, Nat! He looks like a shark, but he acts just like a dog!” Jeff nips at your arm and you put him down. He wobbles towards Natasha to sniff her legs and she presses herself against the wall.
“Absolutely not,” Natasha hisses. “He goes or you go.”
“What?” She’s never given you an ultimatum before, and you’re upset by her callousness. She hasn’t even taken the time to get to know Jeff! Hurt and angry, you scoop Jeff back up and march out of the bathroom.
“Where are you going?” Natasha calls after you.
“We’re both going,” you say, leaving through the front door and walking down the street. Jeff senses your unhappiness and paws at your arm to be put down. He hops to the curb and sits, refusing to go any further. With a sigh, you crouch to sit next to him. Jeff rubs your knee with his head and you pet his back. He’s not furry or soft, his skin smooth and almost rubbery in texture.
“Sorry about all this, Jeff,” you apologize. “Nat’s not normally this mean. I think she’s just jealous because I found you first.”
Jeff licks your leg in solidarity.
“And don’t worry, I won’t give you up. You deserve a chance,” you say. Jeff butts your leg and smiles.
You sit there with Jeff for a while, stroking your new pet shark, when someone comes up behind the both of you.
“Y/N?” It’s Natasha.
“What?”
“Can you please come home?”
“You said it was me or Jeff, and I’m not leaving him.”
Natasha sighs and sits on your other side, steering clear of the shark. But Jeff isn’t fooled and climbs over your legs to sit on Natasha’s lap. He puts his front legs on her shoulders and licks her chin.
“Ew, okay, stop,” she says, giggling as she pushes his head away. Jeff curls up on her lap and sighs contentedly. “For real though, Y/N—what is this thing?”
“A land shark,” you say as if the answer was obvious. “But we can’t just leave him, or give him away to an animal shelter, Nat. Imagine what they would do to him.”
Natasha frowns at the little shark trying to sleep on her lap. “I know.”
“He’s just different. Like you and me.”
Natasha knows you won’t budge, but she wasn’t exactly ready to expand your family just yet. Maybe if the others on the team could help take care of him, she wouldn’t mind him too much. “I guess he would be a good mascot for the Avengers—”
“Yes, you’re the best!” You lean over to kiss her cheek. Jeff startles awake, sensing the change in mood and jumping back and forth from your laps. He tries licking Natasha’s face, but you grab his tail to stop him. “Excuse me, you can get your own girl,” you say and he growls playfully.
“He is pretty cute,” Natasha admits. “And I’ve only kept you around for the same reason, so what’s the difference?”
“Thanks, Nat!” You’re not even paying attention to her anymore. You jump to your feet as Jeff bounces around excitedly. “I’ll race you home, Jeff!”
“Don’t make me regret this,” Natasha mutters, following after you two.