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Hoseok knows by now, with years of experience under his belt, that making assumptions never leads to anything good.
Information is important before making any action. He knew this for Taehyung and Yoongi, and he knows it now with Jimin. The difference now is that the others hadn’t been in the car when Jimin kissed someone, this time it had just been Jimin and Hoseok speaking alone before Jimin ducked away, embarrassed and fragile. This time Hoseok was on his own.
Jimin has been avoiding him ever since their conversation, it’s obvious, and Hoseok is sure the others are starting to notice, especially when Namjoon starts sending them to do tasks together. It’s a fruitless attempt though, Jimin always walking a few steps ahead or behind, silent.
It takes everything in Hoseok not to make assumptions now, watching Jimin’s interactions with the others closely in hopes of figuring out who it is Jimin’s been thinking of recently. The only difference he can find is Jimin spending more time in Jungkook’s room, but it doesn’t count for anything, Jimin is always in his own room or Jungkook’s, and since he’s avoiding his own roommate, it only makes sense that his time with Jungkook grows.
The biggest hint he gets is surprisingly from Jungkook. The maknae stops in Hoseok’s room one night, late, too late for any of them to be awake. He seems relieved to find Hoseok awake.
“Jungkookie, hey. I thought you might be Jiminie.”
Jungkook shakes his head, “Jimin hyung is sleeping in my bed,” he tells the elder of the two, crossing to sit on Jimin’s bed, “Why won’t he talk to you?”
Hoseok sighs, “I think he opened up about something he didn’t think he was going to open up about, and he’s worried about the repercussions if he opens the conversation up again.”
Jungkook nods slightly, humming lightly to a tune that sounds eerily like ‘Serendipity’, “Do you remember when you told me to be sure about my feelings for Namjoon hyung before acting on them?”
“You realized they were just platonic,” Hoseok nods slowly, fearful that maybe Jungkook has decided they weren’t so platonic after all and he’d have another situation on his hands.
Jungkook bites his lip, pulling at the skin on the back of his hand nervously, “Yeah. How do you know if they’re not platonic, though? You said to be sure, how could I have been?”
Hoseok studies the youngest carefully, the usually energetic man now looking more like his shy, teenage self that Hoseok had met all those years ago, “I’m not sure, I guess I’ve never felt it. Have you been thinking about him again?”
“Namjoon hyung? No, I was just curious, I guess.”
“Have you thought about asking Taehyungie?”
“I can’t!” Jungkook snaps his head up quickly, “He’ll tell Jimin hyung!”
Hoseok gives him a funny look and Jungkook blushes bright red, correcting himself quickly, “He’ll tell everyone .”
“What about Yoongi hyung then?” Hoseok offers, and Jungkook seems to think this over a little more.
“Okay… I’ll try and catch him tomorrow. Thank you, hyung.”
“Of course,” Hoseok nods, and when Jungkook stands to leave he falters, “Jungkook-ah! If Jiminie is sleeping in your bed, where will you sleep?”
Jungkook just shrugs, “We’ve shared a bed before,” he replies simply, leaving the room with an air of finality.
Hoseok lays back, staring at the ceiling, before whispering to no one in particular, “Perhaps they have the same problem,” he smiles gently, begging that he’s correct.
-
“Yoongi hyung, are you busy?”
“A bit, Jungkookie, why?”
Jungkook bites his lip and Yoongi dismisses the urge to warn him against it, “I was wondering if you could tell me about love?”
Yoongi stumbles over his actions, almost deleting all his files. He turns away from his computer to Jungkook standing in his studio doorway nervously. Yoongi sighs and gestures for him to sit on his couch, and Jungkook does, “Tell you about love ? That’s a broad statement, Jungkookie.”
“How did you know that you loved Taehyungie hyung?” Jungkook offers, a little more specific. Yoongi smiles gently, the way he always does when he thinks about Taehyung, and leans back slightly.
“I guess there were a lot of things, and accumulation of small moments that I cherished without knowing it, the way every moment of physical contact left my skin tingling. The way his voice left butterflies in my stomach, and how much I was worried about what he thought of me,” he pauses and chuckles, “The kiss definitely helped.”
“Was it terrifying?”
Yoongi pauses at this, studying Jungkook’s face. The maknae avoids his eyes, “ Terrifying ? That’s a strong word, but I guess it was at first. It scared me how much I cared about him, how much he cared about me. It scared me knowing that even if we stay together forever things would be different for the rest of our lives.”
“What made it worth it then? Weren’t you scared? Scared to admit your feelings, scared that it wouldn’t work out and nothing would be the same?” Jungkook rambles, shrinking into himself. He pinches the back of his hand, and Yoongi notices bruises where his fingers meet the skin.
“He did,” Yoongi replies simply, “Nothing was scarier than thinking I might lose my shot, that I would never say anything. Now it’s been a year, and we’re stronger than ever. Hope makes it worth it.”
Jungkook nods slowly, and Yoongi smacks his hand lightly when he starts pinching his skin again, “Is it nice?”
“Being together? Of course.”
Jungkook shakes his head, “Love. Is it a nice feeling?”
“Yes,” there’s no hesitation in Yoongi’s voice, “I wouldn’t trade it for the world, even if he didn’t love me back.”
“What if you had realized you loved him sooner, before he loved you back? Would you have told him?”
“Jungkookie, where are all these questions coming from?”
Jungkook looks up and meets Yoongi’s eyes and the elder realizes suddenly how close the youngest seems to be to crying, “Hyung, please?”
“Okay,” Yoongi starts carefully, concern written on his face, “I think I would have, if I could gather the courage. I think that no matter what I would want him to know how much he means to me.”
Jungkook nods, a shuddering sigh escaping his lips like a silent cry, “Thank you,” he stands and leaves quickly.
Yoongi quickly texts Hoseok to ask if something is up, and the latter is in his studio in a matter of minutes.
“Hyung, I got your text. He talked to you?” Hoseok asks quickly. Yoongi nods, eyebrows furrowed.
“He seemed so scared.”
“Of what?”
“Himself.”
-
It’s been weeks and Jimin still can’t bring himself to speak to Hoseok. He doesn’t want to see that mortified look in his eyes again. A look that bordered on disgust and confusion, however accidental.
He’s curled against Jungkook’s side on the common room couch, the youngest breathing calmly and Jimin bathing in gratefulness for the causality of it all.
He can feel Hoseok watching them and he turns his head to hide his face on Jungkook's side. He feels Jungkook tense and then releases again calmly, pulling Jimin closer. Jimin misses Hoseok’s soft smile and Jungkook’s pink cheeks.
-
“Somethings up with Jiminie,” Taehyung tells Yoongi decidedly, cuddled together in Yoongi’s bed.
“Yeah?”
Taehyung nods, “He keeps sighing, staring into mirrors, and scrolling through old pictures on his phone. I caught him lying in bed caressing his own face like a lovesick school girl pretending to be with her crush.”
“Maybe he is.”
“A school girl?”
“Love sick.”
“Oh.”
Taehyung’s brow furrows, concentrated, “Why doesn’t he tell me things anymore?” He pouts, hugging Yoongi tightly and pouting.
Yoongi chuckles, tilting his head up and planting a kiss on Taehyung’s jaw, “Maybe you should try asking him what’s wrong.”
“You think he’d tell me?”
“You’re literally soulmates,” Yoongi chuckles again, “He’d tell you anything.”
-
“Jiminie, are you okay?” Taehyung tries the morning after and Jimin avoids his gaze.
“Do you think you’ll ever regret confessing to Yoongi hyung?” He deflects the question. Taehyung shakes his head confidently.
“Never.”
“How?”
“I love him,” Taehyung shrugs, like it’s simple. Like it’s easy. Jimin wants to cry.
“I’m fine, Taehyungie, don’t worry about it,” he turns away, “I need to find Hoseok hyung.”
-
Hoseok is delighted by Jimin approaching him until he sees the devastation on the younger man’s face, “Oh, Jiminie, what’s wrong?”
Jimin looks up at him, face scrunching up in an attempt to stop tears from falling, “I think I really love him, hyung,” he sobs, letting Hoseok pull him into a hug.
Hoseok hushes him gently, “It’s okay, Jiminie, breathe,” he traces circles on Jimin’s back while he hiccups out cries.
“I just want to be happy,” he clutches the back of Hoseok’s shirt, and the latter feels a twinge of pain, guilt, empathy, and sadness in his heart, “Why does everyone around me get to be? Where do I find the confidence to do anything about it?”
“I don’t know, Jiminie, I can’t answer that for you. You deserve to be, you deserve so much better,” Hoseok’s nearly crying now too, and he hates himself for the question he’s about to ask, “If you tell him you love him don’t you think things could get better?”
Jimin freezes, “But I promised myself.”
“I know.”
“What if it gets worse?”
“It could.”
“I love him so much.”
“Of course you do, you’ve always felt so much, I would never expect this to be different.”
Jimin lets out careful shaky breaths, desperate to calm himself, “How do I even tell him? If he pushes me away I’ll never be able to live with myself.”
“Try, Jiminie. All you have to do is say it.”
-
“All you have to do is say it,” Jimin thinks over and over again, wringing his hands, Easier said than done, hyung.
Jungkook’s staring at him with concern, and Jimin avoids his eyes, “Jiminie hyung, I appreciate your company, always, but I don’t want you to suffer in silence for my sake. Please tell me what’s wrong.”
Jimin glances up, “Aish, screw you for being observant,” but he smiles softly, “Have you ever been in love, Jungkookie?”
Jungkook’s eyes widen and he blushes, “I think so,” he replies softly, soft enough that Jimin hopes.
“Were you ever so in love that it hurt to be around them because they weren’t yours, but being apart was so much worse?”
“Jiminie hyung,” Jungkook starts but he trails off, settling for nodding sadly, “It’s scary, huh?” And he hopes, begs , that Jimin understands.
Jimin does.
“What do we do?”
Jungkook smiles gently, so gently that it causes Jimin’s heart to clench up, “Hold each other close and wait for the answers?” He tries, only sort of joking. Jimin smiles just as gently back.
“That doesn’t sound like a bad idea,” he laughs painfully, and they stare, afraid. They feel like children, scared school boys who are just finding out that the world will never perceive them as ‘normal’ because they love each other completely.
“Jiminie,” Jungkook starts, cautious and quiet, “I’m terrified.”
“Me too,” Jimin breathes, resisting the tears he feels burning his face as they threaten to reach his eyes.
“But I don’t want to waste this either,” Jungkook laughs. It’s painful, like Jimin’s laugh, but hopeful too, “I don’t want to ever regret not trying . Even if it’s just for us.”
“Just for us?”
“Until we’re sure.”
“You’re not?”
Jungkook reaches out quickly, but hovers a few inches from Jimin’s cheek, “I’m sure I love you,” Jimin shudders at the words being spoken out loud, “I’m sure I always will. I’m so sure I’ll never stop loving you that I’m willing to wait to tell the others until we’re sure that now is our moment, because even if it’s not we will have one.”
“I’m sure I love you too, and I’m sure I always have,” Jimin cries, leaning to rest his face on Jungkook’s hand, “I’m so scared of this, but I’m less scared now that we can do it together. We’ll get through this together now, right?”
“Always, Jiminie,” Jungkook strokes his cheek with his thumb, moving to sit directly by him, “I’m less scared now too.”
Jimin lunges forward suddenly, wrapping his arms around Jungkook’s shoulders. Jungkook yelp’s slightly but snakes his arms around Jimin’s waist quickly, the two clinging to one another like a lifeline, Jungkook’s hands gripping the back of Jimin’s shirt, and Jimin’s hand tangled in Jungkook’s hair and the other grasping the top of his shirt, “I’m so relieved that you love me too,” Jimin practically sobs, shoulders shaking in relief.
“So am I, I don’t know what I would do without you, I love you so much, Jiminie.”
They’re high on fear and love and Jungkook’s pressing kisses to the nape of Jimin’s neck, kisses being pressed to Jungkook’s temple by his hyung, “I love you too, ‘kookie. More than anything.”