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“Finally!” Ace exclaimed as soon as the last dawdling customers had gone and the Mostro Lounge’s door was locked behind them. Ace flopped down on the couch next to the table he was supposed to be bussing with a groan. He threw an arm over his eyes melodramatically. “That shift lasted forever!”
“It’s not done yet,” Deuce said, passing by with his dessert cart loaded up with empty parfait and cocktail glasses. “And it won’t ever be done if you don’t hurry up and clean these tables.” Ace groaned, making no move to sit up. Deuce rolled the cart into Ace’s foot on purpose.
“Ouch! Quit that, my feet are already killing me!” Ace complained, letting his arm fall down to glare at Deuce. Deuce glared back, crossing his arms. “Why are you so serious about this terrible job suddenly?”
“Because I want to get out of here!” Deuce said. “I still have to finish an alchemy essay and my history homework, plus Riddle threatened to make us sleep in the flamingo pen if we don’t get back to the dorm before curfew!”
“Shut up, honors kid,” Ace grumbled. It was a struggle not to stare at Deuce’s anemone, bobbling on his head as he got more animated. “I can’t take you seriously with that sea penis on your head.”
“Don’t call it that!” Deuce groaned, nose crinkling. Another second of their staring contest, and then Deuce caved in, collapsing into the seat opposite Ace and covering his face with his hands. “It does look like a penis. What if my mother sees me like this on someone’s Magicam post?”
“Yeah, if my brother sees this, I’ll never live it down,” Ace agreed. “Serving drinks is one thing but this place is so…objectifying.” Deuce blinked at him, puzzled. “Come on, look around. Azul only made deals with good-looking students. We’re in our little dorm suits, trying to upsell customers on extra drinks and snacks. We’re a host club!”
“Host club?” Deuce repeated, his brow furrowing so hard that his anemone flopped forward.
“Please tell me you don’t need host clubs explained to you,” Ace said, raising an eyebrow. Baffled innocence was so cute on Deuce. “Man, no wonder people keep sticking tips in your chest pocket.”
“I know what a host club is!” Deuce snapped. “But those are for women, and all the students here are guys! That’s not how it…I mean…” Deuce trailed off as reluctant realization filled his face. “Oh my god.”
“There we go,” Ace said. “Now you’re caught up.”
“Ohhh my goddd,” Deuce groaned. “I let those guys from Savanaclaw buy me two drinks and a cupcake! I thought they just wanted to talk about blastcycles!” Ace cracked up laughing, which only made Deuce whine harder. “I was leading them on like a floozy!”
“The delinquent to host pipeline,” Ace cackled. “Hey, you didn’t make top 50 for exams, but maybe you can be the Mostro Lounge’s #1!”
“Shut up! Stop laughing or I’m gonna—urk!”
A sudden yank to their anemones jerked both of them upright, cutting off their fight.
“My, my,” Floyd said, leaning over the back of the couch beside Deuce, arms crossed. “You freshmen sure sound like you’re having fun over here. Care to share the joke?”
“No joke,” Ace said quickly, trying to keep his eyes on Floyd’s smirk and not on the way Deuce’s eyes were wide blue from panic. “This job is just so delightful. Deuce might have had one too many cupcakes.”
“Yes, I did notice that you seem to be a natural, you little sea angel,” Floyd said, pinching Deuce’s cheek. “You had those Savanaclaw boys wrapped tight around your little tentacles. They’ll be back for sure, so make sure to show them a good time, hmm? As for you.” Floyd’s attention turned to Ace, smile suddenly full of teeth. “I had to give you so many talking tos tonight that I’m starting to think you like getting squeezed. Is that it?”
“No! Definitely not!” Ace protested.
“Then I’d better see some more scuttle in your step, crab-chan.” Floyd straightened up and turned to go, calling over his shoulder, “Starting with all these tables, hm?”
“URK!” Ace and Deuce both gasped as their anemones gave another ruthless yank.
“Well, that sucked,” Ace said, slumping back down against the seat. Deuce didn’t answer, eyes down on the glasses he was gathering up on the table. “Deuce?”
“Just help me already,” Deuce said tersely.
Deuce was quiet the rest of the time it took them to close out and on the way back to their dorm. Ace didn’t think much of it, since he was also exhausted and annoyed. Deuce dropped into his desk chair to start on his homework and Ace left him to it, figuring he’d scribble his way through his during breakfast. He opted for a shower instead, trying not to think about much of anything as he soaped up his anemone, and then flopped face-first into bed as soon as he was back in their room.
In the morning, Deuce didn’t talk to the flamingos while he fed them, barely took a single note during morning classes, and didn’t even laugh at lunch when Cater tripped down the stairs and hit the ground so hard two more Caters popped out. Their afternoon shift at Mostro's was absolutely no fun without Deuce to tease or horse around with. To make matters worse, Deuce made himself scarce the rest of the night, only returning to their room just before lights out and barely muttering a good night.
The next day, the situation had not improved either at classes or at work. When Deuce’s low energy starting costing him drink sales, Jade ordered him to swap jobs with Grim as punishment, banishing him to the sinks.
“What is up with you?” Ace demanded once he dodged the twins’ watchful eyes and slipped into the kitchen. Deuce gave him a baleful stare, up to his elbows in soapy water. “Grim’s out there trying to convince a table of Pomefiores that the secret to his fur care regimen is lemon juice. I can’t work with that guy, go beg Jade to switch you back!”
“I’m fine here,” Deuce said, monotone.
“What are you talking about?” Ace demanded. “You look like you’re about to strangle that parfait glass with your bare hands, be serious.”
“At least back here I can’t accidentally seduce anyone with my tentacles!” Deuce snapped.
“Are you mad about that? I’m sorry I teased you, ok?” Ace scratched his head. Deuce grunted, eyes glued down at his scrub brush. “Hey, man, I mean it, it’s no big deal. Two minutes ago I faked a southern accent and let some bozo from Ignihyde put his hand on my thigh so he’d buy a macaron tower. It’s nothing.”
“It’s not nothing,” Deuce said, so low that Ace could barely hear it. Ace tried for a few minutes longer, but it was stupid to stand there arguing alone. He threw his hands up and stalked back out to the lounge, figuring that idiot would come out when he was good and ready to get over himself.
By the end of the shift, Ace was still annoyed, his multiple squeezings from Floyd not improving his outlook. He was sitting at the table where some idiot had spilled a whole strawberry shaved ice on the white marble and just let it sit, scrubbing ineffectually at the stain.
“Stupid shaved ice, stupid customers,” he was grumbling to himself. The couch shifted as Deuce sat down next him, and for a second Ace thought hard about ignoring him. Deuce set down a plate with a pink cupcake, a perfect red cherry nestled on top of the frosting. Ace lifted his eyes to Deuce, expression flat. “Stupid Deuce.”
“Cherry’s your favorite,” Deuce said, which, ok, that wasn’t fair. “It isn’t nothing.”
“It’s a cupcake.” Ace picked it up and started peeling the wrapper off. He’d decide if he was still mad after tasting it. “Are you trying to apologize? You suck at it.”
“I’m not apologizing, I’m explaining,” Deuce replied. “You said it was nothing, but it’s not nothing because I really am a floozy and I really do want to wrap someone around my tentacles, it’s just not two guys from Savanaclaw.”
“What the actual flamingo are you talking about?” Ace asked, somewhat exasperated. He bit into the cupcake, which was velvety and light and blissfully sweet. Damn, he was going to have to forgive Deuce after all. He might even forgive Floyd. “No wonder these cost 1000 Thaumarks, these are nuts.”
“It’s you,” Deuce said, making Ace freeze, wide-eyed, in the middle of taking a second bite of cupcake. “You’re funny and friends with everyone and brave and you talk to the hedgehogs and help me memorize rules without laughing and I was doing so good not making it weird! I was doing great! And then you said only cute boys work here, and I work here so you must think I’m cute. And then I couldn’t stop thinking about you being cute, working in your cute school uniform and flirting with customers, and that stupid anemone really does look like a penis so I can’t stop thinking about your—”
“Whoa!” Ace spluttered, sending cupcake crumbs all over. His cheeks felt like they were on fire. He could feel the gears of his brain grinding as he tried to take in all of that. “Ok, ok, gimme a sec.”
“I’m bad at keeping secrets,” Deuce said glumly. “I tried to keep this one really hard, but I guess I suck at being your best friend just as much as being an honors student.”
“You’re a great best friend,” Ace replied automatically. “And what does any of that have to do with being an honors student?”
“Honors students are definitely not supposed to be naturally good hosts, or to seduce boys with cupcakes, or to ruin everything because they can’t stop thinking about touching their best friend’s…” Deuce’s gaze drifted up to the top of Ace’s head. “Anemone.”
“Geez, can’t you just say you like me like a normal person?” Ace asked, pretending nonchalance while he felt like he’d just taken a hedgehog croquet shot right to the chest. He held out the cupcake. “Here, try a bite of this, it’s amazing.” Ace let Deuce take a cautious bite, then shoved the last piece into Deuce's mouth. Once Deuce looked calmer, less unblinkingly panicked, Ace said, “Ok, like this: I like you.”
“I like you,” Deuce echoed mechanically.
“No, stupid,” Ace said. He wanted to laugh so badly, but forced himself to hold it together so that he could look Deuce directly in the eye while repeating more forcefully. “I like you.”
Deuce frowned, “That’s what I…wait, you do? I like you too!”
“You moron, will you just kiss me?” Ace demanded, done with this entire conversation.
Deuce swooped in to do just that, too quickly, making it kind of like a broom crash. It was fun anyway, because it was the two of them, silly and excited and off-center at first. Deuce tried to press in closer impatiently, and their anemones bumped, making both of them startle apart.
“Don’t say it!” Ace said quickly. Deuce was grinning, eyes glowing brighter blue than the jellyfish light on the table. “No anemone jokes!”
Deuce slid closer, shoulder to shoulder. “With fronds like these, who needs—URK!”
“You two again?” Floyd demanded from behind them, casually jerking them back and forth by their anemones. “Although I must say that was quite an entertaining interlude you two were just sharing. I think tomorrow night I’ll have you repeat it for our patrons as a floor show! Since you’re both obviously useless as wait staff.”
“Come on,” Ace wheezed. Beside him, Deuce’s face was pinker than his stupid cupcake. “Can’t you just squeeze us instead?”
“Aw, crab-chan,” Floyd purred, wrapping arms around both their shoulders. “I knew you liked it! I won't hold back then~.”