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Nayuta wasn't one for showing affection, his boyfriend on the other hand…. He might have gotten all his relationship advice from their drummer. Or some silly romance books that their rhythm guitarist secretly reads. Or personal advice from their leader; which was weird since Kenta didn't do relationships; it’s probably from those dramas he watches while doing paperwork for Gyro. Either way-- A lot of it came from their influence. At least he had some sort of experience… If you could call that experience.
Granted this was Ryo's first relationship. Including himself! Ryo's shown various ways of PDA. Whether it be physical, through words, and even gifting; in the forms of buying him sweets or an emergency cough drop during practice.
However, Nayuta himself… Wasn't exactly the best. Relationships were complicated for him. The fact that he even accepted Ryo's confession was a surprise to him. He's never really felt any sort of romantic attraction to anyone… It also doesn't help the fact he's also flat out rejected one girl's feelings and sent her home crying. He didn't even want to mention his own parents. Nayuta knows for sure he didn't want to end up like his mom and 'that bastard'. Even so… Nayuta felt lacking in their relationship.
Ryo was always declaring their love everywhere they went; meaningfully and to get on his nerves. Sneaky little cheek kisses when Nayuta least expects it and even snuggling on the couch or in bed. The bassist, in general, knew what to do in a relationship such as this… and he… Never showed any of it. What if Ryo takes his lack of affection as offensive!? That’s the last thing he wants!
“Tch…” Nayuta clicked his teeth in annoyance. He was annoyed with himself.
“Oi.” The vocalist called out to his cat; as if she was going to help. But Nyanko trotted over to her owner and sat on his lap. He stroked the fluffy white fur to calm himself down during his personal dilemma. Was he really going to ask his cat for help? It never hurts to try.
And he did.
“Nyanko– How do I show Ryo… affection that doesn’t seem too embarrassing?” Showing affection wasn’t his thing but he wanted to show some effort. However, he’s got a rep to protect!
Nyanko just lets out a little ‘mrrrrrp~’ noise. Luckily she was cute so he’ll let her answer slide.
But yeah, asking your own cat wasn’t going to help at all. He sure as hell wasn’t going to ask his bandmates!
"I'm hooooome…~" A familiar voice echoed through the sharehouse. That was none other than his boyfriend.
“Hmph..”
Just as Nayuta was going to scour the internet for answers to his dilemma; which was probably going to be a bad idea anyway, Ryo arrived home from his part-time job. So much for getting answers…Maybe later when he gets the chance to be alone in his own room.
The bassist walks into the living room with a convenience store bag in his hand. Seems like he went on his usual snack runs after work– Kenta was definitely gonna scold him for eating so much junk food; with the whole keeping up with appearances and all. Nayuta didn’t see the problem with it though, as long as Ryo was keeping up with his music that’s all that really matters. Besides, all that junk goes to…certain assets he likes, emphasis on the ‘ass’ of assests. It was distracting! It was a nice distraction though– BUT THE MORE IMPORTANT THING WAS THAT RYO KEPT UP WITH HIS MUSIC.
‘Ah– What the hell are you thinking Nayuta!? You’re supposed to show affection to Ryo! Not thirst over him!’ The singer mentally beats himself up for letting his mind wander– No distractions, he’s gotta focus. His main goal here was to give Ryo signs of affection! Nayuta has to come up with a solution to show Ryo that he loves him!
“Oh~ I got you a little something~!”
After beating himself up, Nayuta focuses his attention back on Ryo who sat beside him while digging through his bag of goodies. Then he takes out a few cough drops packets; honey lemon, mint, orange, and cherry.
“I figured you were getting a little bored with the usual honey lemon flavour I give you. So, why not change it up a bit? So each practice session we have, you can try out a different flavour! Since we got our major debut we’ll be extra busy making the world happy with your music~”
That's so like him to get different flavours. At least he was thoughtful about his asthma condition…And Ryo wasn’t wrong with them being busy. Ever since they got their debut they’ve worked non-stop, much to the rest of their bandmates’ (Reon) dismay.
“..I don’t need it.” Nayuta scoffed. Another mental slap to his forehead. He definitely sounds like an asshole for saying that.
“Hmm~ If Nayuta-kun doesn’t want it then I’ll keep them, just in case!” With that being said, Ryo stuffed the packets back into the plastic bag.
Another annoyed grunt. Not towards Ryo, but to himself.
God, why is Ryo so…!? Nayuta doesn’t know how to describe it! Good at this? So nice to him when he gave him attitude?! He doesn’t understand! Why was it so hard for him to be thankful? To be the slightest bit romantic towards him?! Gah– Nayuta wanted to scream and pull at his own hair for being so stubbornly emotionally distant! He goes back to petting Nyanko to ease his anxiety and the cat just simply purrs in response… Ryo takes notice of this. How? Well, he’s known Nayuta for almost two years now and they’ve been dating … He just picks up certain habits. And the fact they are dating opens up certain sides of Nayuta Ryo can only see.
“Nayuta-kun?”
“What?”
“You have something on your mind, don’t you? Your space energies are quite tense–”
“...Hmph.”
‘Perceptive as usual…’ Looks like Nayuta could never escape Ryo’s keen eye for picking up emotions. He swears… Maybe Ryo is an alien after all. An alien that sense emotions no less.
“You know, you can tell me what’s going on in that head of yours. I am your boyfriend after all.. I wanna help! And if it makes you happy, then that’s one step closer to my goal~!”
Guess there was no use in hiding it. Nayuta might as well spill the beans and ask Ryo straight up how he feels for the lack of reciprocated feelings Nayuta doesn’t show him.
“If you’re going to keep nagging like that, then fine, I’ll tell you.”
There he goes again making his words sound unintentionally mean.
He takes a deep breath, with anxiety running through his viens he asks the question… Tihough, the question he asks doesn’t come out the way he wants it.
“How do you feel… about me? Being me?”
“I like Nayuta-kun!”
“No, not that you–!! Forget it!!”
“Eeeh… But you definitely have something to say, don’t you? If you have something to say, then say it~”
“I just… can’t…Gaaaah!!!”
There was that burst of frustration coming out of his own lungs.
Ryo jolted back at the sudden outburst and Nyanko immediately jumps off of her owner’s lap from the loud noise.
“N-Nayuta-kun?”
Ryo hesitantly reaches over to Nayuta and rests a hand on his shoulder. Nayuta doesn’t know how to word it. If he could easily put his own emotions into songs, then why can’t he just say what he wants to say to his own boyfriend? This was so stupid! He was stupid! Curse him for inheriting Iyruu Koga’s lack of emotional… everything! He doesn’t want to become like that!
“I’m sorry, Ryo…I just can’t really put my own question into words. But I’ve been having thoughts..”
The touch of his boyfriend's hand carefully stroking his shoulder eases him back to his senses. Ryo just gives him a gentle smile– Not the usual smug or cat like grin he always puts on. One with warmth and reassurance… Those smiles that always always make him feel all warm inside.
“As I said before, I’m always willing to help to make others happy… That includes you, my boyfriend. So take your time with it. No need to force it out.”
“If I don’t force it out then it will eat away at me..” Another deep sigh. If Nayuta doesn’t get it out he’ll only regret it later. His actions will have consequences, and he doesn’t want to think about those consequences.
“How do you feel about me not… responding to the affection you always give me? Or the lack of it…” Nayuta closes his eyes shut and flinches as if he was going to get hit by something. He doesn’t know why he’s doing that, but it felt like an instinct. Maybe hit by the truth?
“I’m fine with it, Nayuta-kun still accepts my love either way! And well…. I’m not going to force you to show any–”
And Nayuta has a bit of a small outburst
“Still– Sometimes I just… Sound like a jerk, like literally just moments a go! I told you to stop nag–”
“Ah~!” Ryo holds a finger to Nayuta’s lips to prevent him from getting loud. And well, Nayuta shuts up for a brief moment.
“If you want my answer just listen alright? You won’t get my answer if you just keep talking over me.”
There was a quiet nod in response. Nayuta really needs to stop doing that– It’s probably because of that stupid stubborn king personality he has. But Ryo was right, no use in blabbering over Ryo’s answer.
“Anyways, as I was saying. You don’t have to show any you don’t want to. It would be a nice surprise if you did! You just don’t have to if you’re not up to it. Besides, it doesn’t have to be both parties kinda thing… As long as Nayuta accepts it, then I’m happy and if Nayuta is happy.. Then that’s a bonus for me~! Huhuhu..~”
That smile only grew wider and Ryo pulled him into a soft embrace… There was that reassurance Nayuta needed. At least Ryo wasn’t upset. So that was good! Right?
“I still wanna show you regardless…” Why was he even still even arguing? Without realizing it… Nayuta was showing said affection. He was just leaning into Ryo’s hold, nuzzling into the crook of the bassist’s neck.
“For someone who’s very smart– You’re quite dense.” Ryo chuckles softly, stroking the white locks of the singer. For someone Kenta speaks highly of… Nayuta was a complete idiot.
“Haah?! The hell is that supposed to mean!?” Oh– Struck a nerve there. No ill intent though, but that was a natural reaction for Nayuta. What a drama queen. Or king in this sense, he is a self proclaimed king of the world.
“What do you think you’re doing right now?”
“Eh?”
Giving it a few moments. Nayuta finally takes note of what he was doing; he was actually returning the hug. His cheeks redden from the sudden realization,… God,it felt like his entire brain was just messing with him now. He really was an idiot. Something small as this… Really does count as a token of sentiment.
“See? This is your way of showing it. Accepting it. It always doesn’t have to be giving, you have your own way. You just don’t realize it.”
“W-Whatever…” And with that, Nayuta hides his cheeks into Ryo’s chest to hide his humiliation. Ryo’s muffled chuckling was only heard through Nayuta’s ears as the bassist’s hold only gets tighter and warmer…
For Ryo, acceptance was the only thing he needed out of Nayuta.
END.