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It had to be three in the morning when Seamus woke up to the sound of creaking floorboards. He rolled over, expecting to see Harry or Ron sneaking out of bed again and completely prepared to yell at them for waking him up. Bloody idiots don’t ever think about anyone but themselves, he thought, mainly frustrated at being woken up at such an unreasonable hour. Especially considering the fact he’d stayed up until one trying to finish a paper for McGonagall.
But much to his surprise, it wasn’t the chosen one or the loyal sidekick. It was his best mate quietly tiptoeing down the staircase towards the common room.
His initial reaction was jealousy. Who could Dean be going to see at this hour? For fuck’s sake, he and Ginny had only broken up a week ago, and Dean wasn’t the type to move on that quickly. Seamus often that Dean was the only one out of all the Gryffindor boys in their year to really capture everything their house was supposed to represent - brave, chivalrous, strong, and always ready to do the right thing.
Seamus tried to force himself to stay in bed and not go chasing after his friend. It wasn’t any of his business if Dean was out with some girl - or boy, he thought to himself, but shook the thought from his mind. Dean would have told him if he was attracted to boys, because told each other everything . In the morning, Dean would probably tell him where he went and Seamus would smile and clap him on the shoulder, just like a best mate was supposed to do.
But patience had never been Seamus’s greatest quality, and less than a minute later he found himself crawling out of bed and after the other boy.
It didn’t take him long to catch up with Dean. The Gryffindor was only in the common room, sitting in one of the many crimson armchair and staring into the fireplace. Seamus wished he could tell what his mate was thinking, but Dean’s face was disturbingly calm. The fire was flickering across his face, and the way it reflected in Dean’s eyes made Seamus blush furiously.
“Sorry,” Dean said, not looking away from the fire. “I didn’t mean to wake you up. Guess I should’ve been a little quieter.”
Seamus tried to shrug casually, but was very well aware of the fact he wasn’t pulling it off. “Nah, it’s fine. You alright?”
“Do you ever think…” Dean trailed off and gestured weakly at nothing. Seamus walked further into the room so he could get a better look at Dean’s face. Not because of the way the shadows were dancing on it, obviously, because friends didn’t think about how beautiful the other one looked. He just felt standing in the stairway probably wasn’t the best way to be a supportive friend, and he wasn’t going to be standing for their entire conversation when there were so many comfortable chairs lying around.
“What?”
Dean shook his head, looking completely crestfallen. “It’s nothing. Forget it.”
Seamus groaned loudly. “Tell me what’s going on.” When Dean didn’t respond, he picked up a throw pillow from the couch next to him and threw it in his friend’s face. “Tell me!”
Dean offered him a weak smile, which was better than nothing. He was quiet for a minute, but Seamus could tell he was going to say something soon, just at his own pace.
“I think I made a mistake dating Ginny.”
“People break up, it happens,” Seamus tried to reassure him. “You didn’t do anything wrong.”
“No that isn’t… That isn’t what I meant.” Dean took in a deep breath. “I mean, I loved her, but I wasn’t in love with her. You know what I mean? When we started dating, I thought, ‘This is it. I’m gonna fall in love and make my mum proud’. But it never happened. I couldn’t make myself fall for her.”
“Oh,” Seamus whispered. It took him a moment to muster up the courage to keep talking, afraid that once he started down this path, he wouldn’t be able to stop. “Hey, Dean, have you ever felt that way about any girl?”
“No, I don’t think so.”
“Have you ever, y’know, felt that way about a— a boy?”
The response was so quiet, Seamus could’ve sworn he made it up, only Dean was looking like he was going to be sick, so he figured he’d heard the “Yes” correctly.
“Why haven’t you told anyone?” he asked, trying not to sound too eager.
“I can’t. I don’t want them to hate me.” Dean looked like he was going to cry. “They wouldn’t understand… My mum, if she found out…”
“Look, I know what muggles think about it, but it’s different here. Even Malfoy didn’t have a problem with Melvin when he came out.” He hesitated briefly. “Well, no more of a problem than before.”
“This is different.” Dean sounded and looked absolutely distraught, like the whole world was going to cave in just because he preferred men. “My family wouldn’t be able to look at me the same way. And what if I started making the Quidditch team feeling uncomfortable? We change in front of each other and I don’t want any of them getting the wrong idea.”
“Dean—”
“Or anyone in the dormitory. We’re all sleeping in the same room and everything. You’re honestly telling me none of you would have a problem with me liking boys?”
“Dean!”
“I know things are better here than in the muggle world, but don’t lie to me and tell me no one is going to have a problem with the fact I’m… I’m gay. Idiots are everywhere and if people here care about something as bloody stupid as blood, then of course they’re going to care about—”
Seamus pressed his lips against Dean’s to make him stop talking. It really wasn’t the most romantic kiss, but Seamus wasn’t well known for his planning skills and Dean really did need to shut up.
“Oh,” Dean breathed. “Oh.”
“Bloody hell, I kiss you and that’s all you can say?” Then again, just because he had come out didn’t mean he was interested in Seamus…
But then Dean broke out into a grin and leaned forward. “You’re right,” he whispered. “That wasn’t very polite of me.”
“You better fucking apologize, Thomas.” Seamus was trying so hard to sound like he was in control, but he was positive his face was redder than the armchair’s fabric.
Dean didn’t need to be told twice and closed the distance between them, cupping the back of Seamus’s head with one hand. Seamus swore his whole body was on fire as he returned the kiss. Six years. It had taken him six years of being best mates with this idiot to get a single kiss and dammit, it was not going to be the last if he had anything to say about it.
The moment, however, was completely ruined when a bushy-haired teacher’s pet walked into the common room, coughing lightly to alert them of her presence.
“Melin, Granger,” Seamus groaned. “What do you want?”
“I thought I should inform you that the two of you are making a great deal of noise, and if you don’t go back to bed - your separate beds - you’re going to wake up the rest of the tower. I’m quite happy for you both, truly, but please wait until tomorrow.”
She turned around and headed back up to the girl’s dormitories, leaving Seamus with a mortified Dean.
“I can’t believe she knows,” he muttered.
“Hate to break it to you, mate,” Seamus grinned, “But I don’t really plan on keeping this a secret, either.”