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“Tell me something,” Sean whispers, nose pressed at his throat, “Give me a clue”
White rubs the tip of his nose against the shell of Sean’s ear and replies quietly, “Look into my eyes, whenever you’re doubting.”
He shifts a little when Sean lifts himself slightly on his elbows staring darkly into his eyes.
White lets him, Sean’s breathe fanning over his lips.
“I can’t... I can’t,” the whimpers escape Sean’s chapped lips unbidden, as he collapses back on White, “You’re both the same, I can’t…”
The teardrops spill, leaving wet trail marks along, the paleness of White’s throat.
“Shh..” he runs a hand through Sean’s hair, careful not to hurt the swollen side.
“Touch me,” White says again, fitting his smaller palms in Sean’s, “Feel me, you’ll know…”
He closes his eyes as Sean’s nails trek across his skin. It’s hypnotic, the feather-soft tingling down his side. White holds back the moan that threatens to slip out of him, as Sean kneads over and over again… around his bony elbows, circling the round bump of his wrist, painting his broken fingertips on White’s open palm…
“It’s still…” White hears Sean’s anguished mumble against his throat, “It feels the same, I can’t tell…”
White doesn’t answer, instead, he softly kisses the spiky hair that brushes his jaw. It smells of gasoline and petrol and earthy dirt that permeates his apartment.
“You know me,” White says with conviction. He crosses his legs around Sean’s frame.
“I know you know me. You know me from my brother… I trust you, and you know me…”
Sean shakes his head, his sobs muffled against White’s skin. He feels worthless one more time in his life, like failing another test he never prepared to take. He tries his best to swallow down the whimpers that rush up to eat him whole.
“Black, I don’t think I will ever be able to tell who you are…”
“White….” White interrupts, “My name is White, Sean, call me by my name…”
He waits until he inevitably feels a small smile break across Sean’s face.
“Who named you guys?” Sean asks finally, his eyes crinkled with a small smirk.
“Cliched people, I guess?!” White shrugs his shoulders, smiling back.
They stay like that for a while, entwined, sheltering each other from their demons, listening to the faraway honks of cars on the freeway.
“I need you,” Sean says breaking the stillness. His voice shakes, he clutches at the shirt around White's waist and says, “I need you, I didn’t before…. I didn’t think I ever needed anyone… But, don’t leave, promise me. Promise me, you won’t leave again…”
A confession White thinks, a concession too…
He allows himself a little smile, an island of happiness in a sea of despair.
“You love me,” White replies teasingly, desperate to see Sean smiling too.
He tickles the sides of Sean suddenly until he bursts out laughing holding onto his bruised ribs.
White revels in the sound of Sean’s laughter, relentless in his tickling attacks, until he remembers even wounded Sean is still the better warrior. He feels it the moment the tables are turned, and Sean captures his wrists in his palm, pining White down with his legs, the laughter swooshing out of White’s lungs like autumn leaves in a gale.
He watches wide-eyed, the myriad of storms that rage in Sean’s obsidian irises. The softening of his eyes, as he leans down and says, “Your brother doesn’t smile like you. No one smiles like you…”
“Then joke,” White replies laughingly, “Say the stupidest joke and make us smile, you can tell us apart then.”
“Just because your ass of a brother never learned to smile, doesn’t mean he can’t catch on and fake one,” Sean grumbles.
“Hey!” White tries to feel offended on his brother’s behalf, but his smile fades as he takes in the angry red contusion blooming across Sean’s face. It pushes something scalding and dark up through his soul like a volcano.
“I’m sorry,” White murmurs, suddenly feeling tears fill up his eyes as he tenderly cups the hurt side of Sean’s jaw, careful not to cause any pain, “I’m so very sorry, Sean… I lied to you. About everything. You didn’t deserve that…”
He watches the slight twitch in Sean’s face, the slow drip of sweat that falls down his side onto White’s collarbone in a spreading wet dot…
“Do you love me?” Sean asks his voice so low White strains to lean closer.
“Yes,” White rises as much as Sean allows him to come up until he can feel Sean’s breathe again on his lips. “I do, I love you with everything in me,”
It’s only a fraction of a second until White feels the taste of Sean’s lips on his. Until Sean engulfs him in a hungry kiss, pushing him into the bed, his tongue plunging in and out of White’s mouth swallowing away all the whimpers, making White his own.
White responds in the only way he knows, the only way he can, he escapes his wrists from Sean’s hands trailing them at Sean’s nape, nipping at his lips, kissing back with all the bottled-up hurt, agony, elation, love, and joy that bubbles up in his soul.
“You know me,” White pants in between the kisses, “You can always know me… you know that don’t you?”
Sean licks down the side of his jaw, feasting on the saltiness of his skin.
“You will let me?” He asks between his reverential loving, “White, will you let me mark you, so everyone can see you’re mine… You’re only mine?”
“Yes,” White wails, “Please…”
He closes his eyes as he feels Sean’s hot tongue lick a stripe across his neck, the feeling sending a tingle across his legs. He feels as Sean worries his teeth across his waiting skin, the anticipation hardening his member. White wails wantonly as Sean breaks across his skin, a hot want flowing through his entire body culminating at the apex of his thighs. He rubs himself instinctively against Sean’s leg, seeking relief as he feels Sean lapping, sucking across his bruised skin, shooting waves of pleasure across his pliant body.
“Sean…” White whimpers brokenly.
“Tell me what you want babe...” Sean asks huskily, his eyes hooded with the same pleasure coursing through his veins.
“Love me, love me tonight… Please,” White begs.
He pulls Sean closer into him, kissing away all the hurt, all the anger, and the grief, “I'll love you forever, so mark me as yours… And you will always find me...”
"As you wish, my love," Sean replies endearingly peppering tiny kisses all over. "And also you need to buy a new phone, White. I never want to send another love message to your brother. NEVER!"
White fails to stop the hysterical laughter that tumbles out of him, holding Sean even closer, as he promises to cherish this man for all of Eternity…
THE END