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She found him two days later clutching a bottle of whiskey in a paper bag, sitting outside of a closed liquor store all alone in the dead of night. Meg sat down next to him and, knowing her all too well, Cas handed the bottle over to her.
Meg took a drag and put the bottle next to her on the ground.
"So..."
"So."
"What's with the moping?” Meg asked, giving him a sideways look. “S'not like you to mope."
"Was just thinking about things. Life," Cas said with a sigh.
Meg snorted through her nose and chuckled, earning her a sour milk stare. "A demon? Thinking about life?"
"My life. It was always my life, my choices, my bad decisions."
"And what bad decisions have you made other than, you know, the obvious?"
Cas turned to her and licked his lips. "You."
"Me?"
Cas leaned into her and Meg leaned towards him. They kissed and a second later he moved away as though they'd not done anything at all.
"The other demons are talking. They know I'm up to something."
"Took them this long to figure it out?"
"King's been trying to find me too. Wants me on his side or something."
"Who? Crowley?"
"Said demonkind needed to be put 'back in line'. Said things were going to change now that Lucy's back in the cage more or less permanently."
Meg licked her lips but said nothing. Lucifer was still a tough subject for them what with their disagreements over him. Meg was for, he was against. He thought Lucifer was just some fairy tale right up to the part where he showed himself. She thought he was the most beautiful like most of her siblings. But that was over and done with now and it was time to move on.
"Why did you come looking for me anyway?" Cas asked.
Meg smoothed out her skirt and wrapped her coat tighter around her, reveling in the warmth. "I got worried when you weren't picking up the phone."
Cas took his phone out of his coat pocket and flipped it open. "Battery died."
"Ah."
"Crowley's a tough son of a bitch. There was a void and he just took over. No mess, no fuss. And now he's in charge."
"Yeah but that doesn't explain why he wants your help."
Cas looked at his hands and whispered, "I could've taken the pedestal for myself. It would've been no trouble. Fast. I am centuries older, inside and outside of hell, than that pathetic 'salesman'."
"But you didn't."
"Nope."
"Why?"
Cas opened his mouth but didn't say anything. "I don't want to be in charge. I was never really a leader. Hell, if it wasn't necessary, I don't want to go back there ever again."
"But it's your home."
"I never really had a home."
Meg sighed and looked up to the sky. She frowned and tried counting some stars in her head. "Hmm, me either."
"What? Heaven wasn't good enough?"
"Heaven was...conformity. Order. Bor-r-r-r-ring."
"That’s…that’s good to know, I guess. Heaven equals boring. In that case – Hell equals I-I don’t even know. Horror? Despair? The worst amusement park in the universe?"
"You okay, Cas?" Meg asked, still not entirely convinced. “You sound a little nuts right now.”
Cas laughed and couldn’t stop; he began getting a little teary eyed. “How do you do it, Meg? How do you deal with being beyond, beyond the end?”
"All of...being beyond the end of days?"
Cas nodded. Meg shrugged. "I'm okay with it. Things aren't so bad."
"How's Heaven dealing without its superimposed dick of a leader?"
"Well, with Michael out of the way, Raphael sort of took up in his stead."
"Isn't he a dick too?"
"Oh yeah. Worse than Michael even."
"So then why don't you do anything about it? The angels wanted the end maybe even more than the demons."
"Pfft. What can I do? I'm nowhere near his level. I'm nothing."
“But they might try to start the Apocalypse once again. The Winchesters…”
“Cas.”
“The Winchesters do not deserve their lives to be upended by…”
“I can’t do anything!”
“You’re a fucking angel! Angels are agents of fate, are they not?”
“Well…sort of….”
Cas only stared at her and she became uncomfortable with him watching her.
"I'd better go..." she finally whispered and got up from the curb.
"Meg?" he called out.
"Yeah?" she said.
"...Nothing. Good luck with Heaven."
"Good luck with Hell. Don't go near Crowley if you can help it, okay? I don't like seeing you hurt."
Cas smirked and pretended to clean out his ears. "Meg, do you have feelings for me?"
Instead of answering, Meg pulled him in for another kiss. They were both loath to separate but a second later, the only thing that was left in front of the closed store was a half empty bottle of whiskey in a plain brown paper bag.