Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

10/13/XX

3:15 pm

Unknown Number: hey, when should we work on the project

Janus: I’m sorry, I think you have the wrong number

Unknown Number: oh oops, sry. i mustve typed it in wrong. didnt mean to bug u. bye

Janus: Bye

10/15/XX

12:38 pm

Unknown Number: sos

Janus: ?

Unknown Number: im havingg an attadck pat help

Janus: Oh, have you tried slowing your breathing?

Unknown Number: tryig

Janus: Alright. In for four, hold for seven, out for eight

Unknown Number: truing

Janus: I’ll send texts as you should count

Janus: In one

Janus: Two

Janus: Three

Janus: Four

Janus: Hold one

Janus: Two

Janus: Three

Janus: Four

Janus: Five

Janus: Six

Janus: Seven

Janus: Out one

Janus: Two

Janus: Three

Janus: Four

Janus: Five

Janus: Six

Janus: Seven

Janus: Eight

Janus: Would you like to continue?

Unknown Number: No, I thinkthat’s alright

Janus: Are you sure?

Unknown Number: yeah, thx

Unknown Number: sry about texting you again. i meant to text my friend but i clicked on ur number

Janus: It’s fine. I know we’ve only texted for a few minutes, but why was my number still at the top of your messages?

Unknown Number: ru judging me for having three friends?

Janus: No. I only have one half-friend, so I can’t really say shit

Unknown Number: oh

Janus: Yeah

10/17/XX

5:21 pm

Unknown Number: hey, what’re u dressing up as for halloween?

Janus: Did you mean to text me this time

Unknown Number: yeah, but i can not text you

Janus: It’s fine, I was just making sure

Janus: I don’t think I’m dressing up as anything for Halloween

Unknown Number: what no u always need to dress up for halloween

Janus: My colleagues will find me unprofessional

Unknown Number: fuck that

Unknown Number: dressing up for halloween is one of lifes few joys

Janus: I have to agree with you there

Unknown Number: isn’t there like a halloween party for ur work or smth

Janus: Yes, but I don’t usually go

Janus: People don’t really like me

Janus: And Halloween is usually kinda unbearable anyways

Unknown Number: y

Janus: reasons

Unknown Number: ok yeah fair

Unknown Number: u dont have to say shit, i get it

Unknown Number: idek y i’m texting you. my friends are just busy rn and im bored

Unknown Number: i guess i should stop

Unknown Number: im surprised i even said anything in the first place

Unknown Number: ig it just felt like, since u were a stranger, i wouldn’t be judged

Unknown Number: yk?

Unknown Number: well no u probably dont ill go and dw i wontt contacet yu agsin

Janus: No, I understand what you’re saying

Unknown Number: you do?

Janus: I think so… And I’m okay with you texting me

Janus: You won’t judge me, right?

Unknown Number: no. no judgment hre

Unknown Number: as long as i get the same from u

Janus: No judgement

Janus: I suppose I like texting you as well. Because you don’t know me and this will never be very relevant

Janus: Sorry, I didn’t mean to make you panic there

Unknown Number: u didnt

Janus: Your spelling becomes noticeably worse when you’re panicking

Unknown Number: oh

Janus: Yeah. Sorry

Unknown Number: its fine, dw about it, im just being anxious, thats normal for me

Janus: I mean, I can see that. You managed to turn a question about Halloween costumes into a mental breakdown

Unknown Number: lmfao thats me. Im special

Janus: Lol

Janus: What are you wearing for Halloween

Unknown Number: im going to be jack skellington

Janus: Nice, I love Tim Burton

Unknown Number: me too. I almost went as victor from corpse bride, but my friend told me that no one would get it

Janus: That’s probably true

Unknown Number: a damn shame

Janus: It really is. People need to get educated

Unknown Number: those uncultured swine

Janus: Exactly

Unknown Number: sry i gtg bye

Janus: Oh. Bye

10/19/XX

7: 38 am

Unknown Number: hey, what am i in ur phone

Janus: Nothing currently. What do you want to be

Unknown Number: Idk

Janus: I’ll put you as Jack Skellington

Jack Skellington: why not ok

Janus: Who am I on your phone?

Jack Skellington: Halloween Heathen

Janus: That’s not emotionally charged at all

Jack Skellington: u just gotta dress up. it’s the law

Janus: If I did dress up, what would the purpose be? I’m not going to the company party, I don’t have many friends, I don’t have a partner, and I don’t have kids

Jack Skellington: just do it for u

Janus: For me?

Jack Skellington: yeah. u dont have to dress up for other ppl

Jack Skellington: im just dressing up for me

Janus: I guess I could do that

Jack Skellington: ru gonna?

Janus: Let me think about it

Jack Skellington: chill. text me if you do

Janus: Ok

Janus: Also, how old are you?

Jack Skellington: i’m a legal adult

Janus: And I can believe you?

Jack Skellington: how do i know ur not a child?

Janus: Because I’ve mentioned my job several times?

Jack Skellington: ok fair but u could be lying?

Janus: I suppose we’ll have to trust each other.

Jack Skellington: yep

Janus: At least tell me if you’re in school

Jack Skellington: yeah i am. Ru?

Janus: I am too

Jack Skellington: u are? but u have a job?

Janus: Yes, but I’m only an intern right now. Trying to get experience, it’ll help me when applying to my actual jobs in the future

Jack Skellington: oh that makes sense

Janus: Yeah

Jack Skellington: i should probably do that at some point…

Janus: What’s your job

Jack Skellington: not telling

Janus: I suppose that’s fair

Jack Skellington: somebody’s moving fast

Janus: Haha, very funny

Jack Skellington: whoever said i was joking

Janus: Well I hope you don’t believe that I’m putting moves on you after knowing you for approximately one week

Jack Skellington: …

Jack Skellington: ig ur right, i would hope that ur not doing that

Janus: How creepy do you think I am

Jack Skellington: seeing how we’re holding a full convo and we’ve only known each other a week? idk…

Janus: Okay, well, I may be slightly creepy, but I’m not quite that creepy

Janus: And besides, I’m not alone in this. You’re creepy too, being a part of this conversation

Jack Skellington: i never said i wasnt

Jack Skellington: i own this shit

Jack Skellington: im creepy and i like it like that

Janus: Hmm

Jack Skellington: what is it

Janus: Somehow, I doubt you’re as creepy as you believe you are

Janus: Or as you wish you are

Jack Skellington: oh fuck off

Janus: So I’m right

Jack Skellington: NO ONE ASKED UR OPINION

Janus: I offered it freely

Janus: That’s what makes me so nice

Janus: Don’t you appreciate my candor and generosity?

Jack Skellington: again, with the moving fast thing

Jack Skellington: just how deprived of validation are you?

Janus: Hilarious

Jack Skellington: i thought so

Janus: You’re rude

Jack Skellington: im trying my best

Janus: Try harder

Jack Skellington: thats what she said

Janus: That barely makes sense here

Jack Skellington: ofc it does

Janus: No

Jack Skellington: yes >:)

Janus: I will block you

Jack Skelington: u dont like my jokes? :(

Janus: I have a sense of humor

Janus: I just like jokes better when they actually make sense

Jack Skellington: my jokes do make sense. u just dont understand me

Janus: Okay, emo

Jack Skellington: LMFSUHFJ

Jack Skellington: lmfaoooooo

Janus: Don’t tell me…

Jack Skellington: …yes…

Janus: Who would’ve guessed

Janus: Halloween crazed Tim Burton fan turns out to be emo and probably queer

Janus: You’re really breaking barriers here

Jack Skellington: oh hahaha

Jack Skellington: ur so fucking funny i forgot to laugh

Jack Skellington: fuck you

Janus: Legitimately though, I don’t have an issue with any of that

Janus: Is it okay if I tease you about it though?

Jack Skellington: depends on if ur talking ab the emo part or the queer part

Janus: Well certainly not the queer part

Janus: I’m queer myself

Jack Skellington: oh ok cool

Jack Skellington: well then sure u can tease me ab being emo

Janus: Screenshotting that for receipts

Jack Skellington: fuck off

Chapter Text

Chapter Text

10/23/XX
3:17 pm
Janus: Do you know how to math?

Anxiety: do i know how to math?

Janus: Yes

Anxiety: no, i do not know how to math, y

Janus: Because I don’t know how to math and I need to know how to math

Anxiety: sry, i cant help u there

Janus: Well isn’t that wonderful

Anxiety: i only know how to english, less than half of the time

Janus: So what happens the rest of the time?

Anxiety: anxiety. or sleep. or tumblr

Janus: Fair. All of those are fair. But I prefer Twitter

Anxiety: ur name is just straight up heathen now

Janus: Also fair

Anxiety: hell yeah it is

Anxiety: no one prefers twitter

Janus: True. I just love watching the world catch on fire though

Anxiety: damn

Anxiety: tru tho

Janus: ;-)

Anxiety: that face is so much more scary then one without the nose

Janus: Thank you

Janus: thats what she said!!!!!

Anxiety: and you were complaining about my ‘thats what she said’

Anxiety: that makes literally no sense

Janus: ur mom doessanf;lkioas

Anxiety: tfffff?????

Janus: I’m sorry. My roommate stole my phone

Anxiety: u have a roommate?

Janus: Yes. He’s a pain in the ass

Anxiety: most roommates r

Janus: Very very true

Anxiety: did u figure out how to math?

Janus: No, I didn’t, ugh

Anxiety: i have a friend that could probably help ya, but do you want me to give out ur number to random strangers?

Janus: If they can teach me how to math, you can give my number to anyone (except the demonic holder of the “T-word”)

Anxiety: what the hell

Janus: :-)

Anxiety: ok well ima just give them ur number now goodbye

Janus: Bye

10/23/XX
3:40 pm
Unknown Number: You are the person who needed assistance with math, correct?

Janus: Yeah. You’re the friend Anx recommended?

Unknown Number: Anx?

Janus: Your friend. It’s a shorthand for Anxiety, which is his contact name.

Unknown Number: I see. May I ask, what are your pronouns?

Janus: Mine are he/they. What about you

Unknown Number: Mine are they and them.

Janus: Cool. What name should I use for you?

Unknown Number: I am referred to as Logan. What is your name?

Janus: If you don’t mind, I’d prefer to use a dated nickname, rather than my actual name. Call me Dee.

Logan: Of course. It is nice to meet you, Dee. Would you like to call? It would be simpler to explain.

Janus: I have no objections

Incoming call from Logan

Call ended (16:34)

Janus: Thank you, Logan

Logan: Of course, Dee.

10/23/XX
4:18 pm
Janus: Your friend is a genius

Anxiety: i know right?

Janus: I wish they tutored me in every class. They taught me more than I’ve learned in any of my lectures

Anxiety: they’re a life saver

 Janus: They really are

Janus: Anyway, I have to go do more homework. You should go take a nap, you’re probably tired

Anxiety: its like ur psychic

Janus: I am

Anxiety: as if

Janus: You can’t prove otherwise

Anxiety: guess i cant

Janus: And with my newfound psychic powers, I’m telling you to get some rest

Anxiety: okayyy

Janus: Good

Anxiety: thx, have fun w/ hw

Janus: You know I will

10/23/XX
8:25 pm
Anxiety: do u know how to do shit?

Janus: No, I cannot say that I know how to “fuck shit”

10/23/XX
8:29 pm
Janus: Are you okay? You haven’t responded and it’s been a few minutes

Anxiety: sry i had accidentally taken a drink when you sent that and i kinda choked

Anxiety: i was not expecting that

Janus: My roommate would be proud of me

Anxiety: ??

Janus: He’s just a very vulgar person, it’s not important though

Anxiety: ok…

Anxiety: anyway that’s not what i was asking

Janus: What were you asking

Anxiety: tbh, idrk

Janus: Ok lol

Anxiety: im just tryna write this STUPID essay and idek how

Janus: What’s the essay about

Anxiety: its about the usage of figurative language in poetry

Anxiety: its like 6th grade level stuff

Anxiety: but i forgot how to do itttt

Janus: What poem did you select

Anxiety: its called a poison tree

Janus: Oh, I love that poem. I’m surprised you chose it, it’s not really your style

Anxiety: y do u think so

Janus: It’s just a poem about deceit and death

Anxiety: yea y

Janus: I guess there’s no real reason

Anxiety: u thought id go for edgar allen poe’s the tell-tale heart?

Janus: It is a poem about anxiety…

Anxiety: and a poison tree is a poem about deceit

Anxiety: i mean, lo did say you told them to call you dee

Janus: Where is this going

Anxiety: its official

Anxiety: ur new contact is deceitful wiles

Janus: Wow, your vocabulary is bigger than I’d expected

Anxiety: excuse me ur talking to an english major

Janus: Why are you majoring in English

Anxiety: tbh, idfk. i always liked to write as a kid and everyone said i should be an author so ig im gonna be an author now

Janus: I guess, but you should really choose your major for you, and not for what everyone thinks about you

Anxiety: yeah ill think about it

Janus: Ok

Anxiety: sooo,,, what’re u doing

Janus: I’m eating dinner

Anxiety: this late?

Janus: Yep. I only got off work at 7:30 and I had homework to do

Anxiety: that sucks

Janus: It really does

Anxiety: should i leave u to ur food and hw?

Janus: Don’t third wheel man, come on

Anxiety: oof sry

Janus: Yeah lol, but I do actually have to go. A four page paper due tomorrow and assigned today

Anxiety: damn

Janus: Bye

Anxiety: bye

10/23/XX
6:23 am
Anxiety: so did u ever come up with a costume

10/23/XX
12:45 pm
Janus: No, and why were you up at 6 am?

Anxiety: idk

Janus: Why would you ever choose to wake up that early

Anxiety: who said i woke up at 6 am

Janus: …

Anxiety: …

Janus: Did you stay up all night?

Anxiety: mayhaps…

Janus: You do need to sleep

Anxiety: awake and unafraid

Janus: Asleep or dead

Anxiety: holy shit you got that???

Janus: Of course. I love MCR

Anxiety: yesssss

Anxiety: none of my other friends listen to them

Janus: Find better friends

Anxiety: lmao

Janus: Or teach them how to have good taste

Janus: One of the two

10/23/XX
12:48 pm
Princey: who are you texting?

Virgil: wdym?

Princey: don’t play dumb

Princey: did you make a friend?

Virgil: idk what ur talking about??

Princey: all of ur friends are sitting at the table rn, looking at you

Virgil: shit

Princey: so,,, who’re you texting???

Virgil: no one

Princey: cmon just tell meeeee

Virgil: piss off

Princey: fuck you

Virgil: right back atcha bitch

10/23/XX
12:59
Janus: Hello? Anx?

Anxiety: oh sry

Janus: It’s fine, I just wanted to make sure you didn’t get hit by a car or something

Anxiety: hit by a car? thats oddly specific

Janus: Well, you could’ve been crossing the road while texting me, but then you got hit by a car and it’s all my fault

Janus: And I don’t want to live with that guilt

Anxiety: lmao no im fine, someone was just bugging me

Janus: Ok

Anxiety: sry, i gtg

Janus: Oh, ok. Bye

10/24/XX
6:32 pm
Pop Star: Kiddo, r u OK? U disappeared after lunch and Logan said that u didn’t make it 2 ur other classes.

10/24/XX
7:56 pm
Virgil: yeah im fine, thx

Pop Star: U sure?

Virgil: yeah. i just wasnt feeling well

Pop Star: OK. Do u want me 2 bring u some soup or something?

Virgil: no im ok, thx tho

Pop Star: Text me if u need anything!

Virgil: will do

10/24/XX
8:27 pm
Microsoft Nerd: Virgil, would you like me to bring you your dinner?

Virgil: nah, im aight

Microsoft Nerd: I’m going to ignore the incredulous ignorance of grammar in that previous sentence.

Virgil: thx

Microsoft Nerd: Virgil, we just want to make sure you’re okay, and that you are eating.

Virgil: i had some leftovers

Microsoft Nerd: What leftovers?

Virgil: yk, the potatoes

Microsoft Nerd: The mashed potatoes? Virgil, that was from a month ago.

Virgil: whatever

Microsoft Nerd: I’ll be up in three minutes.

10/24/XX
8:35 pm
Microsoft Nerd: Since you are disinclined to speak aloud, I shall text you. Would you deign to respond?

Virgil: sure, fine

Microsoft Nerd: Please eat. I know that you enjoy the pasta, as the previous times we’ve gone to this restaurant, you consumed all of your food.

Virgil: im just not very hungry. i told u i already ate

Microsoft Nerd: And I’m doubting the integrity of that statement. Please.

Virgil: fine

Microsoft Nerd: Thank you. May I touch you?

Virgil: …

Microsoft Nerd: I won’t do anything you don’t wish me to, however, Patton has shown that physical contact can be beneficial when one is not feeling well.

Virgil: please

Microsoft Nerd: I see. I apologize for suggesting it, I don’t want to pressure you.

Virgil: no, please

Microsoft Nerd: Oh.

Virgil: ty

Chapter Text

10/25/XX

7:18 am

Janus: What’re you doing today?

Anxiety: nothing much why

Janus: I don’t know, just bored. How many hours of sleep did you get last night

Anxiety: like 3… which is good enough!

Janus: When did you sleep

Anxiety: from 3 til 6

Janus: You’re going to fail school

Anxiety: at least i wont have to do school anymore then

Janus: Fair enough, but you won’t have a stable job

Anxiety: sounds boring

Janus: Yeah

Anxiety: lmfao

Anxiety: gtg, my class is starting in a few

Janus: Sucks that you’ve got a class this early. Bye

Anxiety: bye

10/25/XX

12:23 pm

Anxiety: what ru doing

Janus: Pretending to pay attention to my Psych teacher

Janus: What’re you doing

Anxiety: ignoring my asshole friends

Janus: What’d they do this time

Anxiety: theyre pissing me off

Anxiety: particularly princey

Janus: Princey?

Anxiety: yep. he calls himself a prince, so thats his nickname

Janus: Oh cool

Anxiety: yeah,,,

Janus: What did he do

Anxiety: hes just being a prick, like usual

Janus: If he’s truly bothering you, and he doesn’t stop, you should consider being friends with someone who is better for you

10/25/XX

12:37 pm

Prince Asshole: what are you rolling your eyes about?

Virgil: im complaining about you

Prince Asshole: to that friend of yours?

Virgil: yeah, since they dont piss me off 25/8

Prince Asshole: i will find out who that is.

Prince Asshole: i’ll ask logan to hack into your phone.

Virgil: logan wouldnt. theyve talked to my friend

Prince Asshole: you allowed logan to meet them and not me? what, am i not important?

Virgil: no, ur not

Prince Asshole: omg, you’re such a bitch.

Virgil: says u. now piss off and leave me alone

Prince Fucking Asshole: i’m always watching.

Virgil: that’s creepy asf

Prince Fucking Asshole: says the paranoid emo motherfucker.

Prince Fucking Asshole: well i feel like screaming at me and storming off was not an appropriate response.

Prince Fucking Asshole: you’re really going to sulk like this? you’re such a child.

10/25/XX

12:53 pm

Virgil: im starting to think ur right

Microsoft Nerd: I usually am, but what am I right about this time?

Virgil: sry, wrong number

Microsoft Nerd: It is quite alright. I would like to inquire after your previous behavior. Why did you yell at Roman and then depart?

Virgil: fuck off

Smart Ass: If you insist on behaving like a child, I may have to. I don’t converse with tantrum-throwers.

10/25/XX

1:02 pm

Anxiety: im starting to think ur right. theyre all assholes honestly god

Janus: I’m sorry to hear that

Anxiety: its whatever ig

Janus: If you’d like, I’ll be your friend

Anxiety: were we not already freinds?

Janus: Well, I suppose we were, but sometimes things are clearer if stated aloud

Anxiety: im gonna need u to stop that

Janus: What

Anxiety: stop talking like that, all professional n shit

Janus: Ok

 Janus: Do you need anything

Anxiety: maybe a distraction

Janus: Well, let me tell you about what my roommate, Remus, did today

Janus: Are you bothered by weird stuff? Like, creepy stuff?

Anxiety: not rlly?

Janus: Good

Janus: So, we were sitting at work and he stuck these posters everywhere

Janus: [attachment sent] https://twistedmemories31.tumblr.com/post/677916070481477632  

Anxiety: oh god

Janus: Yeah… That was a fun convo with our boss, because of course it managed to rope me into its stuff

Anxiety: lmfao

Anxiety: nyway, u live in topsfield?

Janus: No, but he does

Anxiety: oh cool. i live 20 min away from topsfield

Janus: Interesting

Anxiety: yeah

Anxiety: where do u think he got that freaky doll?

Janus: You don’t want to know

Anxiety: i dont?

Janus: You don’t

Anxiety: ok…

Anxiety: lmfao im scared now

Janus: You should be

Anxiety: tf??? i was not expecting that lmfao and i started laughing in the middle of the hallway

Anxiety: fuck everyines lookin at mne

Janus: Just keep walking. They’ll forget and go on with their days

Anxiety: k

Anxiety: yea they stopped wattching me

Janus: Good. Why don’t you go somewhere more private, in case my ridiculously charming and attractive hilarity causes you to draw attention again

Anxiety: got it

Janus: That wasn’t a denial…

Anxiety: [insert denial here]

Janus: Lmfao

Janus: So, do you wanna talk about your friends

Anxiety: i guess.............

Janus: Princey did something to piss you off…

Anxiety: yea he keeps bugging me about shit that i dont want to talk to him about

Anxiety: but he does this all the time

Anxiety: he cant fucking take a hint

Anxiety: hes always mocking me or insulting me or annoying me

Janus: And you’ve asked him to stop?

Anxiety: i mean yeah

Anxiety: but aparently he just took it as a onrmal jokey thing

Janus: Maybe try to spell it out for him more clearly? And if that doesn’t work then he’s not worth it

Anxiety: yeah, thanks, i think ur right

Janus: Of course I’m right

Anxiety: oh fuck off

Janus: :)

Anxiety: …

Anxiety: :)

10/25/XX

2:54 pm

Pop Star: Heya kiddo, just wanted 2 check in on u.

Pop Star: Lo said that u needed some space, but it’s been a couple of hours and u’ve been avoiding me and Roman.

Pop Star: Logan said u were in their class, so I know ur not completely MIA, which I’m thankful 4.

Pop Star: But I just want what’s best 4 u, and I think u and Roman should talk.

10/25/XX

3:11 pm

Prince Fucking Asshole: can we talk? pat’s mad that we’re fighting and that you’re avoiding him, which isn’t fair. don’t avoid him just because of me.

10/25/XX

5:28 pm

Virgil: yeah ok i was planning on that

Virgil: and i wasnt avoiding you, just roman, but since ur dating, its kinda hard to only avoid him and not u

Pop Star: That makes sense. It’s kind of a given with the whole dating thing. Sorry, kiddo.

10/25/XX

5:41 pm

Virgil: ugh fine i already talked to pat

Virgil: and i wasnt avoiding him, just u, but ur always by him so,,,

Prince Fucking Asshole: that’s kind of the whole thing with dating. you’re usually with your partner.

Prince Fucking Asshole: but it’s not like you’d know much about that, huh.

Virgil: yeah there goes ur chances of pleasnig patty

Virgil: no w leave my the fuck aloneo r ill block u

Prince Fucking Asshole: like you’d dare

Prince Fucking Asshole: you don’t want patton to be mad at you just as much as me

[The user you are trying to contact has blocked you.]

Prince Fucking Asshole: WHAT THE FUCK

Prince Fucking Asshole: YOU GODDAMN DICK

Prince Fucking Asshole: OH MY FUCKING GOD

Prince Fucking Asshole: ISTG I WILL MURDER YOU

10/25/XX

5:50 pm

Anxiety: cani yo helwp me

Janus: Of course. Breathe for me. 4, 7, 8

Janus: 1

Janus: 2

Janus: 3

Janus: 4

Anxiety: ie canted

Janus: Ok, then let’s try a different excersize than last time.

Janus: Can you name five things you can see?

Janus: You don’t have to spell them right, don’t worry.

Anxiety: hpone

Anxiety: tfan

Anxiety: tv

Anxiety: cuoch

Anxiety: hrdands

Janus: Good. Four things you can touch.

Anxiety: shrit

Anxiety: folor

Anxiety: shose

Anxiety: hair

Janus: Wonderful. Three things you can hear.

Anxiety: neihgbors

Anxiety: casr

Anxiety: tv

Janus: You’re doing great.

Janus: Two things you can smell.

Anxiety: sweart

Anxiety: leftovers

Janus: And one thing you can taste.

Anxiety: bloedo

Janus: Blood?

Anxiety: ye

Janus: Why do you taste blood?

Anxiety: bti my lip

Janus: Ok. How are you feeling now?

Anxiety: bettre

Janus: But not the greatest. Why don’t you turn on the tv?

Anxiety: tot waht?

Janus: Anything you’d like. Are you watching any shows right now?

Anxiety: one dya at a tmie

Janus: Oh, I love that show. Why don’t you turn it on?

Anxiety: k

Janus: Who is your favorite character?

Anxiety: prob schnerder

Anxiety: schnider

Anxiety: shneirer

Anxiety: fcuk

Anxiety: fuckfuckfcuk

Janus: It’s okay, you don’t have to spell his name right. It’s Schneider.

Anxiety: ye

Janus: Why is he your favorite character?

Anxiety: cuz hes an actualy dumbass

Anxiety: but he still tiries his bset and cares abt them all

Janus: That’s a really good reason to like him.

Anxiety: whos ur facv crarcater?

Janus: Mine?

Anxiety: yeah

Janus: Either Elena, Penelope, or Lydia.

Anxiety: y?

Janus: I really like Elena’s passion, especially about the government and society. I like how hardworking Penelope is, and how despite being an adult, she still struggles, and she admits that she struggles. I like Lydia in general. She’s bright, dramatic, and a fun character.

Anxiety: nice

Anxiety: thats actrually relly nice

Janus: Yeah.

Anxiety: whats ur fav ep?

Janus: How far into the series are you?

Anxiety: last ep

Janus: It’s between the porn/sex ed episode, the one where Schneider relapses and they find out, or Elena’s quinces. One of the three.

Janus: What about you?

Anxiety: i really like teh depression/anxiety one, the relapse one, or the one where they get citisenship

Janus: I really like those episodes as well. What was your opinion on their depiction of an anxiety attack?

Anxiety: i dunno. it wasnt super accurate, its not quite like the world fades out, but it kinda does and it wsa knda trye. like it wsas smiltaneauously true andnot true

Anxiety: wow  i misplelled tha

Janus: That’s perfectly fine. What about the citizenship episode? What did you like about that episode?

Anxiety: i thought it was fnuny how schneider was from canada lmao

Janus: Me too! And when he was comparing the similarities between him and Lydia, and he was talking about how he immigrated when he was 18 and so did she and then they all just gave him a look.

Anxiety: i really like how schneider just wanted to be loved. he wanted to be accepted, he wanted a family

Anxiety: i really really like schneider

Anxiety: also, hes not unattractive…

Janus: Exactly, dilf

Anxiety: lmfaoooo

Anxiety: ty

Janus: Of course.

Anxiety: sry to bother u

Janus: You weren’t bothering me

Anxiety: ok. ty

Janus: You don’t believe me, but it’s true

Anxiety: how do u know im lying over text?

Janus: I’m a professional liar, I know how to read tone in a text message

Anxiety: pro liar?

Janus: Not literally. I’m just a good liar

Anxiety: oh

Janus: Yeah.

Anxiety: thx nyway

Janus: Anytime

Anxiety: srsly tho thank you so much, if u werent here i woud not have been ok

Janus: Why didn’t you message your other friend, yk, the one you tried to message the first time you came to me

Anxiety: cuz then he wouldve been suspicious

Janus: Do you want to talk about it

Anxiety: maybe in the morning

Janus: Ok. What do you want to talk about now?

Anxiety: mroe shows?

Janus: Ok. Are you watching any others

Anxiety: have u seen gravity falls

Janus: Yes!!!

Anxiety: woah

Janus: Sorry

Anxiety: dont be, thats just like the most emotion ive invoked in u

Janus: Not true, but I suppose so

Anxiety: lol ok

Anxiety: nyway, whos ur fav character?

Janus: Bill Cipher

Anxiety: wow instant reply. i cant say im surprised

Janus: He’s just the best

Anxiety: he is pretty great

Janus: Who’s your favorite character

Anxiety: idk. robbie?

Janus: Robbie?

Anxiety: maybe??? no, probably soos or wendy

Janus: I like Soos and Wendy as well, but why Robbie?

Anxiety: u cant laugh

Janus: Cross my heart and hope to die

Anxiety: hes kinda gender envy. hes kinda my aesthetic

Janus: Huh.

Anxiety: ru laughing behind the screen?

Janus: Definitely not

Anxiety: right…

Janus: Why do you like Wendy and Soos?

Anxiety: well, soos is the comic relief so yeah ima like him, and i can lowkey, kinda sorta maybe relate to wendy? a lil bit?

Janus: Cool

Anxiety: y do u like bill so much?

Janus: He’s brilliant, he’s charismatic, he’s manipulative, and he’s a badass villain

Anxiety: yk what fair

Janus: Exactly, thank you

Anxiety: im rlly tired and im gonna go take a nap now. gn and ty

Janus: Goodnight, Anx

Chapter Text

10/26/XX

8:17 am

Prince Fucking Asshole: Good Mythical Morning!

Smart Ass: Salutations, you three.

Pop Star: Good morning, Logan! Good morning, sweetie!

Prince Fucking Asshole: good morning to you too, my dearest heart.

Pop Star: Oh, stop, ur making me blush.

Prince Fucking Asshole: but, my love, your blush is so pretty! why would i stop?

Virgil: jesus fucking christ stop flirting at 8 in the morning in the gc

Smart Ass: Yes, I must concur with Virgil. Although I would have phrased it more delicately, please cease your romantic banter.

Prince Fucking Asshole: oh shut up, dick-ola tesla.

Pop Star: Language! Be nice 2 each other!

Virgil: how funny

Virgil: the thing is pat, he cantt be nice to shit. cause hes an asshole

Pop Star: Virgil, come on. Language. And u know Roman, he’s ur friend.

Virgil: he used to be.

Prince Fucking Asshole: you bitch!

[Virgil has left the chat]

10/26/XX

8:18 am

Pop Star: Hey, Virge, ru alright? Won’t u come back? We can talk about it.

Pop Star: Please.

10/26/XX

8:19 am

Smart Ass: Virgil, this is an unreasonable line of action. Please return and discuss this problem calmly.

10/26/XX

8:22 am

Prince Fucking Asshole: wtf are you doing??? get your ass back here you absolute dick, this is so stupid

[The user you are trying to contact has blocked you.]

10/26/XX

8:23 am

Prince Charming: he blocked me

Loganrithm: He has not decided to respond to me.

Patton: He hasn’t replied 2 me either! I hope he’s alright…

Loganrithm: I’m sure he’s fine, Patton, don’t be dramatic. I would assume that Roman did something to upset our companion.

Prince Charming: what??? why are you blaming me???

Loganrithm: Oh, I don’t know, perhaps because he seemed particularly upset at you, and the two of you have been quarrelling for the past several days.

Prince Charming: stop spending time with virgil, you’ve developed a sense of sarcasm

Prince Charming: and i have class, so we’ll have to continue this discussion later!!!

Loganrithm: Fine. But rest assured, we will not figuratively drop this topic of conversation.

10/26/XX

9:13 am

Loganrithm: Roman, I know for a fact that your class has finished. I would like to discuss Virgil now.

Patton: Yeah, sweetie, I agree with Lo.

Prince Charming: you guys are ganging up on me??? fine, whatever

Loganrithm: Did you say something to him?

Prince Charming: i’ve said a lot of things to him, you’re gonna have to be more specific

Loganrithm: That day, at lunch. What did you say to him that caused him to storm off?

Prince Charming: … do i have to say?

Patton: Please, love, we’re just trying 2 understand.

Prince Charming: fine. i might have sort of kind of slightly a little bit called him paranoid.

Loganrithm: Why would you do that?

Prince Charming: i was angry, okay?? i know that it wasn’t very princely behavior and i’m ashamed of myself.

Patton: Did u tell Virgil that?

Prince Charming: …no

Patton: Well u should probably find a way to make sure that he does. That kiddo can hold a grudge, so u had better make it up with him ASAP.

Prince Charming: okay. for what it’s worth i truly am sorry for the strife our arguments have created. he hasn’t only been taking his anger out on me, and you guys don’t deserve it.

Patton: Thank u, Ro. Love u, good luck. <3

Prince Charming: love you too. <3<3

Loganrithm: Stop flirting in the group chat, please.

Prince Charming: make me. :)

10/26/XX

9:52 am

Janus: Morning

Anxiety: morning

Anxiety: ty for not saying good mirning, like the

Anxiety: like everyone else

Anxiety: well, not logan, but the others

Janus: I would never assume that your morning is going well, or that you want it to go well

Anxiety: lol

Janus: So, do you feel like talking?

Anxiety: how much time do ya got?

Janus: My next class isn’t until 11 am today

Anxiety: nice

Anxiety: ur about to hear some shit so u better be ready and not levae me cuz i nede you rn

Janus: I’m not going anywhere.

Anxiety: thx

Anxiety: so basically, i have this friend, princey. he can be an asshole, cause he’s prideful and stubborn. he likes to insult me because it makes him feel better about himself, yk, typical bully shit

Janus: Okay.

Anxiety: recently hes been bugging me about, well, you

Janus: About me?

Anxiety: yea he’ll ask me who im texting and shit like that and he wont stop bugging me

Janus: Oh.

Anxiety: yeah. but this isnt new or anything, hes always acted like this

Anxiety: its just becoming a problem cause i keep asking him to leave me alone and he refuses

Anxiety: we’ve always fought but its getting more common

Anxiety: we just dont agree on much

Anxiety: at lunch yesterday, i was texting u, and then he started to bug again

Anxiety: and i told him to leave me alone but he didnt

Anxiety: and it escalated until i yelled at him and left the table

Anxiety: then he texted me, bugging me again, and my other friends backed him up

Anxiety: and when u had to help me thru an attack, ysterday

Janus: You don’t have to say anything if you’re not comfortable.

Anxiety: ik, and im gonna explain

Anxiety: he was pissing me off, and so i blocked him

Anxiety: but i immediately unblocked him

Anxiety: and he started to scream at me over text

Anxiety: ill just send you this

Anxiety: [screenshot sent]

Janus: Oh wow. That’s a little over the top.

Janus: And definitely unwarranted.

Anxiety: yeah ig, but that’s just his whole personality. over the top and unwarranted

Janus: Hm

Anxiety: anyway thats why i was having that attack

Janus: Right.

Anxiety: so this morning, my friends were talking in the gc and him and his bf were flirting, ugh they’re so annoying

Anxiety: so i told them to stfu

Janus: Which didn’t lead to a peaceful compromise

Anxiety: no

Anxiety: i left the gc since he wouldnt leave me alone

Janus: That’s not going to douse any fires

Anxiety: ik. it just seemed the esaiest thing to do

Janus: Do you want my advice?

Anxiety: srue

Janus: You’ve asked Princey to stop, multiple times, and he has refused.

Janus: At this point, it might be better for your mental health to cut him off. Are the other friends better than him?

Anxiety: ya, logan and pat

Janus: If they treat you better than him, but have been backing him up, perhaps talk to them and let them see your side of the situation?

Anxiety: ok. i didnt talk to thme before nwo becaus the three of them wree frieidns before i cmae to this school and theyer all coles to one another

Janus: When you join a pre-existing friend group it can feel difficult to fit in as well as the others.

Anxiety: exactyl

Janus: Even if you don’t feel like you fit in as well, if you value their friendship enough to keep it, you should try.

Anxiety: ok yeah that makes sense thx

Janus: Of course. Is there anything else?

Anxiety: i have a calss with price asshole tomrow and i dont wana go but i don wanna fail that class

Janus: Do you share that class with any other friends?

Anxiety: no

Janus: You could show up a few minutes late, after the lecture has started but before anything important has been said. Then you could leave a few minutes early, or when class finishes and blend in with the crowd, so that he won’t be able to talk to you.

Janus: If he does manage to confront you, you can either give him another chance, or tell him to leave you alone.

Janus: It’s your choice. Just a suggestion.

Anxiety: thats a good idea

Anxiety: thank you

Anxiety: so much

Janus: Anytime. I’m really glad you felt like you could trust me enough to talk to me. Not many people do.

Anxiety: why not

Janus: I tend to be very sarcastic, and apparently I don’t seem like a trustworthy person. There’s more to it, of course, but I’d rather not elaborate.

Anxiety: ok

Anxiety: i have a class starts in 30 min and i havent showered yet, so ima go. bye, ttyl

Janus: Goodbye. Good luck

Chapter Text

10/27/XX

10:35 am

Prince Fucking Asshole: are you coming to class?

[The user you are trying to contact has blocked you.]

Prince Fucking Asshole: oh, right

[The user you are trying to contact has blocked you.]

Prince Fucking Asshole: I GET IT SHUT UP

[The user you are trying to contact has blocked you.]

10/27/XX

10:39 am

Anxiety: just slipped into class

Anxiety: wish me luck

Janus: good luck

10/27/XX

11:37 am

Prince Fucking Asshole: thank you, virgil, for giving me the chance to talk

Virgil: stfu

Prince Fucking Asshole: …okay

Virgil: say waht u need to say

Prince Fucking Asshole: i just wanted to apologize for my behavior over the past few days. it was inappropriate and not very princelike of me. i am sincerely sorry, especially when i insulted you and instigated all those fights

Virgil: ok

Prince Fucking Asshole: and you don’t have to forgive me, but don’t punish pat and logan. they don’t deserve this. they want to talk to you

Virgil: i was planning on talking to them

Prince Fucking Asshole: good

Virgil: is that all?

Prince Fucking Asshole: i am going to do my best to be better

Virgil: fine

Virgil: great

Virgil: wonderful

Prince Fucking Asshole: i feel like you’re not going to accept my apology…

Virgil: that’s the problem with this group! we have issues, but we just gloss over them with empty promises that we’ll try to do better and excuses and then we bury our problems! you think this is going to be so easily forgiven???

Virgil: [screenshot sent]

Prince Fucking Asshole: eugh

Virgil: yeah, prince asshole, death threats

Virgil: wtf do you want me to say???

Prince Fucking Asshole: i really am sorry. you know how my temper gets

Virgil: yes. i do

Prince Fucking Asshole: wait no that was an excuse and you said no excuses

Prince Fucking Asshole: i don’t know what to say

Prince Fucking Asshole: what can i do to make it up to you?

Virgil: despite what ive been saying

Virgil: i will give you one more chance

Virgil: your last chance

Prince Fucking Asshole: yes, okay, of course

Virgil: and you’d better not fuck it up

Prince Fucking Asshole: okay

Virgil: see you at lunch, dumbass

Prince Asshole: until lunch, frank i-eerie

10/27/XX

11:46 am

Anxiety: i talked to him

Janus: And?

Anxiety: he apologized and promised to do better

Anxiety: im gonna give him the second chance

Janus: Ok. How are you feeling?

Anxiety: better? i yelled at him and was able to rant about some things, so that helped, i think

Janus: I’m glad.

Anxiety: yeah

Anxiety: im gonna try lunch with them

Anxiety: hopefully itll be fine

Janus: I hope so as well.

Anxiety: so, what are you doing?

Janus: I’m waiting in line to grab some food.

Anxiety: yum, where

Janus: Starbucks…

Anxiety: basic bitch

Janus: lmao

Janus: It’s the only place to eat on campus that isn’t $20

Anxiety: debatable. and they dont have much food

Janus: They actually, surprisingly enough, have breakfast and lunch options. I’m getting a sandwich

Anxiety: nice

Janus: Yeah

Janus: What are you going to do now

Anxiety: pribably go take a nap until lunch

Janus: Sounds like a plan

Anxiety: yeah. bye

Janus: Oh bye

10/27/XX

12:03 pm

Prince Asshole: our dark and stormy knight has returned!

Pop Star: Yay!

Smart Ass: Welcome back, Virgil, we are pleased to have you with us.

Virgil: yeah

Pop Star: Whadda ya want for lunch today, kiddo?

Virgil: idk

Virgil: i might not eat, i had a big breakfast

Pop Star: Kk! Make sure ta eat a big dinner 2!

Virgil: kk

Smart Ass: I may have to leave, if you don’t cease the abuse of proper grammar functions.

Virgil: suck it

Prince Asshole: u don like dis?

Pop Star: We’ve gotta reset the countdown now! It has been 0 days since Logan complained about grammar.

Pop Star: U could say they’ve been… ticked off. :D

Prince Asshole: wonderful, my heart!

Virgil: one of ur weaker ones

Pop Star: I guess I should clock in!

Smart Ass: I swear to God, please cease this madness.

Pop Star: Father Time blesses me and grants me the power of time puns.

Virgil: tf???

Pop Star: Woah, I dunno what just happened!

Pop Star: I was in a days!

[Smart Ass has left the chat]

[Pop Star has added Smart Ass to the chat]

Smart Ass: Let me leave!

Virgil: u cannot escape

Prince Asshole: you’re stuck here for all eternity

Smart Ass: Damn it.

Pop Star: Language, mixtus!

Virgil: is that even a thing?

Smart Ass: I’m unsure, but I’m partial to it.

Pop Star: It was a mistick, but I guess mistocks can do something right!

Smart Ass: I will see you all at lunch. Goodbye.

Virgil: bye

Pop Star: See ya, mixtus!

Prince Asshole: farewell

10/27/XX

12:27 pm

Virgil: where ru guys?

Virgil: oh nvm found u

10/27/XX

1:49 pm

Smart Ass: Virgil, I have a question for you.

Virgil: yeah, lo?

Smart Ass: What in particular did Roman say to upset you yesterday and the days before?

Virgil: u really wanna know?

Smart Ass: Yes, please.

Virgil: fine. here’s from when i blocked him for the first time

Virgil: [screenshot sent]

Smart Ass: Is that everything?

Virgil: ive kinda made a new “friend” or whatever

Virgil: you talked to them, when you helped with his math

Smart Ass: Yes, Dee, I remember.

Virgil: yeah

Virgil: anyway hes been bugging me about them, trying to figure out who im talking to

Virgil: and the other day he called me paranoid

Microsoft Nerd: Yes, he informed us of that incident, but I do believe there were some exempt details.

Virgil: yeah, probably. here are the texts

Virgil: [screenshot sent]

Microsoft Nerd: Thank you for your compliance, Virgil. I must review this data. I will get back to you at a later date.

Virgil: ok, i trust u

Microsoft Nerd: I promise.

10/27/XX

2:14 pm

Loganrithm: [screenshot sent]

Patton: Lo? What is this?

Loganrithm: The messages that Roman sent to Virgil.

Patton: Come over. The door’s open.

10/27/XX
8:39 pm

Pop Star: Do u guys wanna have a study group?

Microsoft Nerd: That sounds acceptable, as long as you stay on topic.

Prince Asshole: logan. my friend. have you met us?

Virgil: sounds good. where r we going?

Pop Star: Could we go to urs?

Virgil: sure.

Prince Asshole: see you all there!

10/27/XX

9:31 pm

Anxiety: well i am fully and officially exhausted

Janus: I am as well

Anxiety: i wanna go to sleep

Janus: Then go to sleep

Anxiety: yeah,,, no

Janus: Of course not

Janus: I’m changing your contact name

Insomnia Incarnate: to what?

Janus: [screenshot sent]

Insomnia Incarnate: dramatic much?

Janus: It’s my specialty, sweetheart

10/27/XX

9:46 pm

Janus: Hello?

Insomnia Incarnate: oh sry, i had to go grab a textbook i left behind

Janus: Sure

Janus: So, what are you doing now

Insomnia Incarnate: i should be studying

Janus: But what are you doing?

Insomnia Incarnate: watching netflix

Janus: Nice

Insomnia Incarnate: random question

Janus: Ok

Insomnia Incarnate: whats ur fav animal?

Janus: Snakes

Insomnia Incarnate: woah quick reply

Janus: Yep. There is no debate

Insomnia Incarnate: snakes are cute, but theyre scary

Janus: I don’t think they are. I always wanted one growing up but my parents wouldn’t let me

Insomnia Incarnate: i always wanted a spider

Janus: Are spiders your favorite animal? Even though they’re not animals

Insomnia Incarnate: ye, they r. and stop u sound like logan

Janus: Good. Logan is smart

Insomnia Incarnate: they rlly are. it pisses me off why are they so good at everything and im just in the corner failing my classes

Janus: lmao

Janus: Wait wait wait

Janus: Let me lay out all the facts here

Janus: Jack Skellington. Victor from Corpse Bride. Tim Burton. MCR. Spiders. Insomnia. Anxiety.

Janus: You’re either alt, goth, punk or emo

Janus: But you’re not alt, goth, or punk

Janus: So you’re emo

Insomnia Incarnate: istg

Insomnia Incarnate: stfu

Janus: I’m not hearing a denial

Insomnia Incarnate: fuck off

Janus: ;)

Insomnia Incarnate: and what ru?? hmm?

Insomnia Incarnate: anxiety, loner, tim burton, snakes and porbably more

Janus: You’re just gonna have to wait to find out ;)

Emo Bean: ??

Janus: [screenshot sent]

Emo Bean: that’s what you changed my name to???? omg please nooo fucknig hell

Janus: It’s too late

Emo Bean: fine. here

Emo Bean: [screenshot sent]

Janus: “slimy snek boi”?

Emo Bean: yep

Janus: Why?

Emo Bean: cuz i dunno what else to put but i gotta get u back!

Janus: You have to?

Emo Bean: yes

Janus: Sucks for you then, because that doesn’t really bother me, it only confuses me

Anxiety: dammit

Anxiety: i will find a way to annoy you, i promise

Janus: Good luck with that

Anxiety: damn u

Janus: ;)

Anxiety: so,,, whatre u gonna be for halloween

Janus: No! I thought you’d forgotten about that

Anxiety: never

Janus: Damn it

Janus: I’m not going as anything. It’s too much work, and there are only three more days until Halloween

Anxiety: it doesnt have to be elaborate

Anxiety: next year we can do smth complex

Janus: Come on

Anxiety: nope im not budging

Janus: What should I go as then

Anxiety: lemme think

Janus: Take all the time you need

Anxiety: the sand snake from beetlejuice

Janus: The sand snake from Beetlejuice.

Anxiety: leave me aloneeee im tired :((

Janus: So go to sleep

Anxiety: hahaha

Anxiety: no

Janus: Of course not

Anxiety: idk what u should go as

Janus: I’ll go as a giant blow up snake

Anxiety: holy shit yes pls

Janus: lmfao

Janus: https://www.alibaba.com/product-detail/Funny-giant-pythons-inflatable-snake-costume_62405770328.html  

Anxiety: lmao i love it

Anxiety: look what i found~

Anxiety: https://www.walmart.com/ip/Gemmy-Halloween-Airblown-Animated-BeetleJuice-Sand-Worm-Yard-Inflatable-120-08/776950361  

Janus: That is a yard decoration

Janus: Not a costume

Anxiety: a little diy and makeup will fix it up

Janus: No

Janus: I’ll buy the wrap around snake

Anxiety: yay!!!

Janus: Are you happy now?

10/27/XX

9:48 pm

Pop Star: Whatcha smiling about, kiddo?

Virgil: what?

Pop Star: U’ve been grinning at your phone

Prince Asshole: and you giggled. giggled! i didn’t know you could do that!

Pop Star: Ro, be nice.

Prince Asshole: what? it’s a fair thing to say

Microsoft Nerd: Roman is not incorrect. In the past two years that we have known you, you have chuckled and smirked, but I have only documented a full smile once and two belly laughs. No giggles or blushes.

Virgil: blushes? who said anything about blushes

Prince Asshole: ooh you’re blushing right now

Prince Asshole: covering your face with one hand doesn’t hide your cherry red face

Pop Star: Let’s not forget that time a few minutes ago where he put his phone down for ten minutes and stared at the ground, blushing a bright red!

Virgil: patton, even you? betrayal

Pop Star: Sorry kiddo! Ur blush is 2 cute!

Pop Star: [sent attachment]

Virgil: you took pictures????? delete those now!!!

Prince Asshole: if you delete those, we’re breaking up

Pop Star: Nooo! D:

Pop Star: I wasn’t gonna delete them anyway tho.

Prince Asshole: send them to me!!!

Microsoft Nerd: If you would send them to me as well, I would be pleased.

Pop Star: U got it!

Virgil: istg

Pop Star: <3

Prince Asshole: <3

Microsoft Nerd: <3

Virgil: even you, lo?? this is extremely out of character

Microsoft Nerd: *shrugging emoji*

Virgil: did you just type out “shrugging emoji”?????

Pop Star: Roman, if you don’t return my phone, I will have no other option then to remove it from your possession.

Virgil: oh

Microsoft Nerd: give my boyfriend’s phone first!

Pop Star: We shall return the items simultaneously.

Microsoft Nerd: Thank you, Roman.

Pop Star: Thx, Ro!

Prince Asshole: <3

Virgil: im done w this convo

10/27/XX

9:51 pm

Janus: Hello? Are you okay?

10/27/XX
Dee: Hello, Logan. Sorry to contact you, I am unsure if you wished to terminate all contact, since I am a stranger. I was hoping to ask after Anx. I texted him a while ago but he never responded, which is unusual for him. Is he okay?

10/27/XX

9:52 pm

Microsoft Nerd: Oh look, Dee messaged me, asking about Virgil. I’m going to go reply now and explain about Virgil’s infatuation that we have been teasing him about, which is why he has been delayed in replying.

Virgil: LOGAN ISTG

10/27/XX
9:53 pm

Logan: Do not worry, Dee. He is perfectly fine. We have simply been detaining him by teasing him about his crushasijdfklasdfo900000

Dee: This is more concerning than before.

Logan: sry, this is anx. logan’s being a bitch and doesnt deserve his phone rn. im fine, but i gtg. ttyl, ok?

Dee: Ok. I’ll text you tomorrow morning. Bye

Logan: thx bye

Chapter Text

10/28/XX

2:26 am

Anxiety: hey

10/28/XX

6:12 am

Janus: What were you doing awake at 2:26 am?

Anxiety: not sleeping

Janus: Hilarious

Anxiety: ikr?

Janus: What time is your first class?

Anxiety: 9:15

Janus: Go to sleep

Anxiety: but i cant

Janus: Have you taken any Melatonin

Anxiety: no,,,

Janus: Then go take some Melatonin

Anxiety: but it doesn’t work!!

Janus: Just try it first. Please. I’m worried about you.

Anxiety: fine

Janus: Thank you

Anxiety: gn

Janus: Night

10/28/XX

8:22 am

Rat Bastard: heya jannio! i cant believe it took us this long to exchange numbers!!!!!!!

Janus: No, we’ve exchanged numbers before now, you just deleted the conversation. I have you saved. And we’re qpps, you really thought we hadn’t exchanged numbers before now

Rat Bastard: hmm, maybe!

Janus: Care to explain why you’ve contacted me this morning?

Rat Bastard: i dunno! im bored!!

Janus: Wonderful. Well, this number is for emergencies only, like the apartment burning down, not for idle chit chat

Janus: You wouldn’t even have my number if you weren’t my roommate

Janus: That’s too much power

Rat Bastard: good to know!!

Rat Bastard: hey, what’s ur favorite colror??!!

Janus: …

Janus: Yellow

Rat Bastard: really? i would’ve taken you for a blue guy, or grey!!

Janus: Fascinating

Rat Bastard: my favorite color is green!

Rat Bastard: not like a forest green, or even a grass green!

Rat Bastard: lime green!  

Rat Bastard: or chartreuse!

Rat Bastard: one of the two!!

Janus: I will silence you

Rat Bastard: kinky! would you prefer a cloth gag or a tape one?!

Janus: I’ll see you at lunch

Rat Bastard: see ya j-anus!! <3

10/28/XX

9:16 am

Anxiety: morning

Janus: Morning

Janus: Did you take the Melatonin

Anxiety: yes

Janus: Did you really

Anxiety: yeah, i did. i didnt fall asleep tho so idk what to do

Janus: Perhaps you could take stronger sleep meds? Or take the Melatonin at a more appropriate time

Anxiety: i’ll try. logan has some nyquil i can borrow

Janus: Ok

Janus: Sorry, I have to go, but I’ll text you later, ok

Anxiety: k. bye

Janus: Bye

10/28/XX

9:41 am

Virgil: hey, lo, can i borrow some sleeping meds?

Microsoft Nerd: Of course, Virgil.

Virgil: ty. i’ll drop by in a bit

Microsoft Nerd: Sounds amenable.

Virgil: lol

10/28/XX

11:47 am

Prince Asshole: guysssssssssssss

Microsoft Nerd: Yes, Roman?

Virgil: what

Prince Asshole: i’m bored. entertain me, peasants!

Virgil: literally no stfu

Microsoft Nerd: Go study for the Art History test you have tomorrow.

Prince Asshole: i could do that…

Prince Asshole: but i don’t think i will

Microsoft Nerd: Dumbass.

Prince Asshole: smartass

Microsoft Nerd: Prick.

Prince Asshole: pleb

Microsoft Nerd: Prep.

Prince Asshole: dick

Microsoft Nerd: Asshole.

Prince Asshole: nerd

Microsoft Nerd: Half-wit.

Pop Star: Roman, Logan! 

Pop Star: Stop, I thought u were more mature than this. I’m very hissapointed in both of u. 

Pop Star: Either apologize right now or slither off to sulk.

Microsoft Nerd: I will do anything to get you to cease texting in such a manner.

Pop Star: I can’t hear u, I don’t have earsssss.

Microsoft Nerd: Actually, despite snakes having no externally visible ears, they do have organs that process sound.

Prince Asshole: oh my god shut uppppppp

Microsoft Nerd: Roman. I apologize for responding to your immaturity. I know that you were only acting in such an aggravating way to ilicit a reaction out of me, and I regret ever metaphorically rising to your figurative bait. It was crude and barbaric, and I do not want to be that kind of person, not like you are. I am truly sorry.

Prince Asshole: thank you very much, logan, i knew you would come around. i’m sorry as well

Virgil: holy shit lo ur a legend

Pop Star: Sweetheart…

Prince Asshole: what is it?

Microsoft Nerd: Nothing of any consequence to your infinitely dense brain functions. I must depart now, I have class to attend and I believe some of you may as well. Goodbye.

Pop Star: Ssssee ya, Logan! And if you’re by my dorm, snake your way over, you’re very welcome!

Virgil: bye bye

Prince Asshole: goodbye! wait, what did you say?

10/28/XX

12:41 pm

Janus: Are you home right now

Rat Bastard: yep! but you might not wanna be… :DDD

Janus: Remus, when we began to room together, what was the one thing I asked of you, besides basic responsibility when it comes to chores

Rat Bastard: dont fuck in the apartment!~

Janus: Exactly. Your work will remain separate from your home. So, would you care to explain why I wouldn’t like to be home right now

Rat Bastard: oh, no, you’ve got it all wrong!!

Rat Bastard: i don’t have any clients over!

Janus: Then why shouldn’t I be home right now?

Rat Bastard: because the kitchen is on fire!!

Janus: What.

Rat Bastard: the kitchen is on fire!!

Janus: What?

Rat Bastard: the kitchen is on fire!!!!!

Janus: What??!?!

Rat Bastard: the kitchen is on fire!!!!!!!!!!!

Janus: You set the kitchen on fire????

Rat Bastard: yep!!!!

Janus: I’ll be home in 7 minutes. Get the fire extinguisher.

Incoming call from Janus

Call ended (0:08)

Janus: Why is it so loud??

Rat Bastard: the fire alarm and the neighbors’ screams!!

Janus: Holy fucking shit

Rat Bastard: ooh, you must be pissed!! you don’t normally swear much! !

Janus: You are an absolute fucking bastard dick. When I said to only text me if you burned down the apartment, I didn’t mean it literally!!!

Rat Bastard: you’re really gonna have to be more clear about that in the future then!!

Janus: Clearly. I’m here. Have you called the fire department yet?

Rat Bastard: nope, but the neighbors probably have!!

Janus: Dial 911 immediately.

Rat Bastard: okie dokie!

Janus: Where are you?

Rat Bastard: in the apartment!!!

Janus: Get the fuck out now, you fucking dumbass!! Please

Rat Bastard: okie dokie ima chokie!!

Janus: Just shut the fuck up and text me when you’re on the ground and I’ll come find you.

Rat Bastard: <3

Rat Bastard: hurry?

Janus: Please

10/28/XX

12:43 pm

Rat Bastard: ok i called the police!

Janus: Yep, they’re driving past me now. I’ll be home in 4 or 3

Rat Bastard: ok

Janus: Make that 2

10/28/XX

12:51 pm

Janus: You dick, where the fuck are you?? There’s a huge crowd!!

10/28/XX

12:55 pm

Janus: I’m coming. Please

Chapter Text

10/29/XX

8:38 am

Anxiety: hey, dee? are you ok?

10/29/XX

11:57 am

Janus: Hello, Anx, I apologize for the late response

Anxiety: its fine, im just worried about you. ru ok?

Janus: Yes, I’m fine.

Anxiety: ur sure?

Janus: Yes, thank you for your concern.

Anxiety: ok. what’s up?

Janus: Not much. I was studying for an exam yesterday and I turned off my phone so it wouldn’t distract me. I was up late and slept in late.

Anxiety: ah, that makes sense

Janus: Yeah. I may not be able to respond much or very quickly today either because of the exam, and a project that I have to complete.

Anxiety: oh ok. gl

Janus: Thank you. Bye.

Anxiety: bye

10/29/XX

12:46 pm

Prince Charming: hey, love?

Patton: Yeah, sweetie?

Prince Charming: i require your assistance.

Patton: Whadda ya need?

Prince Charming: today, during lunch, did it seem… awkward to you?

Patton: Hmm…

Patton: Maybe a lil bit, why?

Prince Charming: i do believe it’s partially my fault. i apologized to virgil and i’m going to try to do better, to keep a better wrap on my temper, but i need help. virgil and i weren’t the most close from the beginning, but i’d like to get to know him better, so that i can know how to treat him better. what do i have to do to accomplish this?

Patton: Woah, that’s a lot to break down!

Prince Charming: yeah sorry

Patton: No, I didn’t mean it in a bad way! It just means that ur passionate, sweetheart.

Prince Charming: thx

Patton: Of course!

Patton: Anyway, I think u just need 2 spend some more time together! Why don’t u go hang out? Maybe watch a movie, or go to the park?

Prince Charming: but i don’t want it to be obvious that i’m singling him out

Prince Charming: can we plan a movie night but you and logan have to leave early or something?

Patton: Ooh, that sounds like a good plan! That way, Virgil won’t feel anxious about having 2 spend time with you one-on-one until you’re already talking, face to face.

Prince Charming: yes, exactly.

Prince Charming: could you ask logan?

Patton: U got it, my sweet prince!

Prince Charming: thank you, dear heart. i love you

Patton: I love u 2, sweetie! <3

Prince Charming: <3

10/29/XX

12:58 pm

Patton: Heya, Lo!

Loganrithm: Salutations, Patton. Do you require my assistance with anything?

Patton: Well, it’s kinda a complicated situation to explain over text. Call me maybe?

Loganrithm: As long as you promise not to make any more horrendous references to trashy 2000s pop.

Patton: Pinkie promise!!

Incoming call from Logan

Call ended (7:58)

Logan: Please send a text to the group chat now.

Patton: U got it!

10/29/XX

1:06 pm

Pop Star: Who wants 2 have a movie night?? It’s been forever since we all just hung out together!!

Virgil: sounds pretty chill

Microsoft Nerd: This appears to be an acceptable proposal.

Prince Asshole: a wonderful idea, my love!

Pop Star: Aww, thx, sweetie! How does tonight at 6 pm sound?

Prince Asshole: at my place?

Pop Star: Sure!

Virgil: sounds good

Microsoft Nerd: I will make note of the event.

Pop Star: HooRay! I’m excited!! I can’t wait 2 sea you all there! It’s gonna be a splash!

Microsoft Nerd: I give up.

Pop Star: Hehe :)

10/29/XX

9:43 pm

Prince Asshole: i know i already said this, but thank you, virgil.

Virigl: yeah, whatever its fine. u said you wanted to hang out?

Princey: yes, please. perhaps in three days?

Virgil: sounds good. im free after lunch

Princey: adios, hasta luego

Virgil: see ya

10/29/XX

9:50 pm

Virgil: hey, dee, hows it going? how did ur test go?

10/29/XX

11:38 pm

Janus: I think it went well, thank you.

Anxiety: that’s good

Janus: Definitely better than the alternative.

Anxiety: yea lol

Janus: I apologize, but I have to go to sleep, it’s late. You should get to bed as well.

Anxiety: ok. gn, ttyl

Janus: Goodbye.

10/29/XX

11:42 pm

Virgil: hey lo, ru up?

Microsoft Nerd: Yes. Are you alright?

Virgil: idk…

Microsoft Nerd: Perhaps you will feel better after getting some sleep?

Virgil: i doubt it

Microsoft Nerd: Would you like to disclose the reasons behind your discomfort?

Virgil: do u wanna listen?

Microsoft Nerd: I am here for you, Virgil.

Virgil: ok

Virgil: im worried about dee

Microsoft Nerd: That was not the statement I was expecting. However, please continue.

Virgil: theyve been acting weird

Virgil: not answering their phone quickly and he’s been finding reasons to cut off our convos

Microsoft Nerd: What excuses have they been giving?

Virgil: he said that he had ans exam and a project,  but idk

Virgil: we’d texted yesterday in the morning and than tehy said they would text me back later, but they didnt  get back to me until noon toaday, after i askded if he was ok at 8am r so

Microsoft Nerd: I will address your concerns momentarily, however, I currently believe that it would benefit you to take a moment to breathe. Follow the patterns you’ve been shown.

Virgil: k

Microsoft Nerd: When you are feeling more secure, please inform me and we will resume our conversation. Or, if you’d like, we could call?

Virgil: pls

Incoming call from Microsoft Nerd

Call ended (2:38)

Microsoft Nerd: Now, as you stated that you would like to discuss this topic over text rather than over call, I would assume you are ready?

Virgil: yeah

Microsoft Nerd: If Dee’s metaphorical radio silence is concerning to you, try to discuss it with him. If you do not wish for confrontation, then be there to support him. It is feasible that they are going through something difficult. They will open up to you when they are ready, and all you can do for him is to stay with him.

Virgil: yeh ur right

Microsoft Nerd: Of course I am. But thank you. I hope that has provided some semblance of comfort.

Virgil: i think it has, ty

Microsoft Nerd: Now, I believe it would be in both of our best interests to acquire some rest now.

Virgil: yeah, probably. gn 

Microsoft Nerd: Good night.

10/29/XX
11:58 pm

Janus: I know you won’t get this message right now.

Janus: Hell, maybe not ever.

Janus: I just hope that you will get it, eventually.

Janus: No matter how long it takes.

Janus: Know that I would be by your side right now, if they hadn’t kicked me out.

Janus: Now, you absolute asshole, get up. Come to me. Please.

Janus: Or I will start praying, and neither of us want that.

Janus: Just…

Janus: Please.

Chapter Text

10/30/XX

9:13 am

Anxiety: hey

10/30/XX

9:16 am

Virgil: so, where are we gonna meet tomorrow night, whats the plan

Pop Star: Well, I think we’re gonna go 2 Roman’s apartment at 4, watch some movies, get ready around 6 and then go trick or treating! Unless someone had something else in mind?

Microsoft Nerd: That sounds acceptable.

Princey: sounds good, love!

Pop Star: All righty then! What are u 2 gonna go as again?

Princey: me and patton are going as rapunzel and flynn rider

Virgil: no ones gonna get it

Virgil: ur not charming enough

Virgil: and ive seen ur “smoulder”

Princey: i can’t say i can disagree with the smoulder comment, but i’ll have you know i am very charming!

Princey: i played prince charming.

Virgil: you played cinderellas prince from into the woods

Princey: same difference.

Virgil: its literally not, since cinderellas prince was a stuck-up, cheating, asshole

Virgil: its pretty accurate tho

Princey: fuck you. i am not a cheating bastard and i resent that comment.

Virgil: i didnt mean the cheating part, i meant the stuck-up asshole part, not the cheater part

Princey: good.

Pop Star: U’re very charming, sweetie!

Princey: thank you, my dear heart. <3

Pop Star: And I don’t think u’d ever cheat on me! <3

Princey: exactly, because i wouldn’t!! so there, v

Virgil: i get it, ur saps

Princey: just wait until you have a partner! then you won’t be so dismissive.

Virgil: well i dont

Princey: wait

Princey: wait wait

Princey: hold the phone

Pop Star: What is it, Ro?

Microsoft Nerd: Yes, please get to the point.

Princey: virgil has a crush on someone??????

Virgil: what??? where did u get that frmo?

Pop Star: OMG he totally does!!

Virgil: wait u too?? where is this coming from???

Princey: virgey has a crush~

Virgil: fuck you, im outta here

Pop Star: Wait, no, come back!

Virgil: i have class to go to, bye

Pop Star: See ya!

Princey: you can’t escapeeeee

Microsoft Nerd: I must depart as well. Farewell.

Princey: bye-bye

10/30/XX

11:21 am
Anxiety: hey, ru ok?

10/30/XX

11:23 am

Princey: why do you look so anxious?

Virgil: take a guess, asshole

Pop Star: Be nice!

Virgil: whatever

Virgil: can i just… have some alone time? Please?

Pop Star: Of course, Virgey! Take as much time as u need! We’ll be here for u when u need us!

Virgil: k thx

Virgil: ttyl

Princey: bye.

Pop Star: See ya!

Microsoft Nerd: Farewell.

10/30/XX

11:28 am

Pop Star: I’m worried about Virge! He’s not doing 2 great!

Princey: yeah, i agree. he doesn’t seem to be his normal self.

Microsoft Nerd: This is most likely because his friend is distancing themself from Virgil and, as you all might say, “ghosting” him.

Pop Star: That would do it! I hope Virge’s friend is alright.

Princey: the friend that he’s always texting?

Microsoft Nerd: Yes.

Princey: oh.

Microsoft Nerd: Virgil seems to be relatively close with Dee, and he is thusly concerned for them and their erratic behavior.

Princey: seems like a crush to me…

Microsoft Nerd: If you repeat that sentiment to Virgil, I assure you that you will push him away. He is very protective of Dee, and, as you have seen, he is reluctant to share him with us.

Microsoft Nerd: Or at least you.

Princey: me??

Microsoft Nerd: Yes, you. You are the one who has been pestering Virgil about his friend. Every time you do, Virgil shuts down the conversation and leaves.

Pop Star: Yeah, sweetie, we need to be more careful about that topic.

Pop Star: Lo, can I have Virgil’s friend’s number? I need to talk to them.

Microsoft Nerd: I will text them to ask permission. Right now, Patton, you and I have tests tomorrow, so we should begin studying.

Pop Star: Oh yeah! I forgot about those, LOL

Princey: byeeee! have fun studying!

Pop Star: See y’all later!

Microsoft Nerd: Goodbye.

10/30/XX

11:36 am

Logan: May I give your number to a mutual friend of mind and Anx’s? He says he has something he would like to discuss with you.

10/30/XX

4:35 pm

Janus: Sure, why not

Logan: Thank you. I will send him your contact information now. Expect a text in a few moments.

10/30/XX
4:36 pm

Logan: Here is Dee’s number. Dee is not aware of Virgil’s name, he knows Virgil by the name “Anx”, so be careful about your usage of Virgil’s name.

Logan: XXX-XXX-XXXX

Patton: Thx, Lo! I’ll be careful!

Logan: You are welcome.

10/30/XX

4:38 pm

(???): Heya! U’re Dee, right?

Janus: Yes, I am. And you are…

(???): I’m Patton!

Janus: I assume you are the person that Logan said would be texting me

Patton: Yepper do! He/him pronouns, and u?

Janus: He/they pronouns, thank you

Patton: Of course! Now, do u have time 2 talk? I’ve heard ur kinda busy!

Janus: Yes, I have time to talk right now

Patton: Great!

Patton: U’ve been really worrying Anx with ur radio silence! He’s been in a flurry. It’s not very ice of u 2 ghost him like that. Don’t u care about him?

Janus: Yes, I know. There are circumstances that are causing my “radio silence”, and I’d thank you very much not to assume things about me. Also, are puns really appropriate right now?

Patton: Right, no, of course! But still, be careful! I want to make sure ur a good influence on Anx, and that u won’t hurt him! And puns r always appropriate! If u don’t think so, u must have a frozen heart.

Janus: I am not going to deliberately and knowingly do anything that will hurt Anx. I would appreciate it if you didn’t harass me over a situation you have minimal knowledge of.

Patton: Harass? This isn’t harassment! Harassment is typically viewed as persistant botherance and bullying, not 1 friend looking out for his other friend!

Janus: Sure. Is that all you have to say? Baseless and rampant accusations about me being a bad person?

Patton: I’m just saying, Anx seems 2 be a little 2 concerned with u and if ur not careful, u both will not be in contact with 1 another.

Janus: Wonderful. I fully understand what you’re trying to say.

Patton: I sure hope u do! I GTG, but I hope u’ll text Anx back!

Janus: I was planning on it.

Patton: Bye!

Janus: Goodbye.

10/30/XX
5:45 pm

Janus: Hey. I’m fine, don’t worry.

Anxiety: oh good

Janus: Yeah

Anxiety: whatre u doing

Janus: Sitting on a bench.

Anxiety: fun

Janus: If you like boredom.

Anxiety: yea

Anxiety: random btu bear w em

Janus: Ok

Anxiety: tbh im glad u texted me back

Janus: Of course I would text you back. I’ve just been busy.

Janus: And anyway, your friend made sure that I would text you back.

Anxiety: lo?

Janus: No, Patton.

Anxiety: patton??

Janus: Yes.

Anxiety: howd he get ur number?

Janus: Logan asked me if I would be alright with them giving my number to Patton, because apparently Patton had something to tell me.

Anxiety: …what’d he say?

Janus: He told me to reply to you because I was worrying you.

Anxiety: oh huh

Janus: Yeah

Anxiety: how busy ru tomorrow?

Janus: Not very busy

Anxiety: nice

Janus: Can I see your finished Jack Skellington costume tomorrow?

Anxiety: sure

Anxiety: can i see ur finished snake costume tomorrow?

Janus: No, sorry. It was damaged by my roommate’s dog. Now it has a bunch of holes in it.

Anxiety: oh damn. i wish i could help, i can sew

Janus: I can sew as well, but it’s irreparable. Very sad.

Anxiety: yea it rlly is

Anxiety: now the world will never get to witness the absolute wonder that is dee in a blow up snake costume

Janus: How dreadful

Anxiety: indeed

Janus: They have truly been deprived of an absolute wonder

Anxiety: truly

Janus: Yeah. Oh, sorry, I have to go. Goodnight

Anxiety: gn

10/30/XX

5:58 pm

Virgil: did you blackmail dee into talking to me?

Pop Star: What? Of course not! I don’t blackmail people!

Virgil: ru sure?

Pop Star: Of course I’m sure! I just wanted 2 check up on them and make sure he is not going 2 break ur heart, Virge.

Virgil: that’s not ur job and its not ur business

Pop Star: Virgil, that’s not fair. I’m just looking out 4 u!

Virgil: dont talk to him, dont mess with us

Pop Star: Ok, if it means that much 2 u, I won’t.

Virgil: thank u

Virgil: but u dont have my trust rn

Pop Star: What? Y?

Virgil: u went behind my back and talked to dee when u knew that i didnt want u 2, or at least that i wouldnt agree

Virgil: dont do it again

Pop Star: I won’t, I promise. 

Virgil: great. gn

Pop Star: Night.

10/30/XX
8:51 pm

Janus: I know that you won’t receive this right now.

Janus: You just got out of surgery and I’m sitting beside you.

Janus: No, I’m not holding your hand

Janus: I’ve seen the stuff you touch

Janus: Tomorrow you’ll be in and out of surgery all day long.

Janus: Nurse Flores said he’s gonna kick me out of the hospital, just for tomorrow, since I’ve been here every day

Janus: I can’t say I appreciate it much, since I have no house and I have no friends

Janus: But I can’t do much about it

Janus: Please be okay

Janus: Goodnight

Chapter Text

10/31/XX

12:00 am

Anxiety: Happy Halloween!!!!

Janus: Omg, proper capitalization? Who are you and what did you do with Anx?

Anxiety: omg, replying within a minute of a text message? who ru and what did you do with dee?

Janus: Oof, that’s a low blow

Anxiety: you started it man

Anxiety: but sorry

Janus: I’m joking, don’t worry. I am really sorry about the past couple of days

Anxiety: it’s fine, dw about it

Anxiety: water under the bridge

Anxiety: as long as it doesn’t happen again, right?

Janus: Haha, yeah

Anxiety: what ru doing up at 12 am?

Janus: What are you doing up at 12 am?

Anxiety: scrolling through tumblr. now u

Janus: Watching TV. I couldn’t sleep

Anxiety: yo same

Anxiety: big mood

Anxiety: whatre you watching?

Janus: A cartoon

Anxiety: what cartoon?

Janus: Ducktales

Anxiety: dt17 or dt87?

Janus: DT17

Anxiety: nice, i love that show

Janus: I do too

Anxiety: fav character?

Janus: I’m not sure.

Anxiety: fav season?

Janus: S1 or S3

Anxiety: fav eps?

Janus: The Town Where Everyone Was Nice, Louie’s Eleven, the Last Crash of the Sunchaser, Quack Pack

Janus: You?

Anxiety: the last crash of the sunchaser, quack pack, the ballad of duke baloney, whatever happened to donald duck?

Janus: Nice. I love those episodes

Janus: Do you have a favorite character?

Anxiety: either lena, donald, or louie

Janus: Why?

Anxiety: i vibe with all of them. and donald is way underappreciated

Janus: He really is

Anxiety: yeah

Janus: I really like Louie. He’s very clever. He’d probably be my fav character, I guess

Anxiety: y

Janus: He’s good with words and he’s a good critical thinker. It doesn’t seem like that, but if you think more about it, it’s true. He’s also good at pulling off his schemes

Anxiety: unlike glomgold

Janus: Yeah lol

Anxiety: so,,,,,,,,,

Janus: Yes?

Anxiety: weblena?

Janus: Holy shit yes!

Anxiety: ikr??

Anxiety: they were totally dating

Anxiety: all the “oh my bff sacrificed herself for me” and “our friendship is the strongest magic”

Anxiety: so gay

Anxiety: and violet, webby, and lena are all qpps

Anxiety: totally canon

Anxiety: or it should be

Anxiety: just wanna say, this is simultaneously comforting and absolutely mortifying

Anxiety: hey ru ok? u haven’t responded in a bit

10/31/XX

12:23 am

Janus: Yes, I’m fine, sorry. Just got distracted.

Janus: I should probably get some sleep. You should too. Goodnight. I’ll talk to you in the morning.

Anxiety: ok gn ttyl

10/31/XX

7:26 am

Pop Star: Who’s excited 4 trick-or-treating later????

Princey: meeeeeeee i ammmmmmm!!!

Virgil: ugh why are u guys awake so early

Pop Star: Just woke up early!

Princey: yep! i also have to finish this project that is due in 45 minutes so…

Pop Star: Honey! U need 2 do ur work bee-fore the day of!

Pop Star: U’d better get working. Turn off ur phone so it won’t buzz and distract you from your work!

Microsoft Nerd: You all are the bane of my existence. Please return to sleep. Or cease texting. One of the two.

Virgil: woah, lo, ru ok?

Microsoft Nerd: Of course. I am operating at optimal efficiency. The coffee has ensured as much.

Virgil: ah, its the caffeine

Microsoft Nerd: I believe so.

Princey: what are you guys talking about???

Pop Star: They’re reading each other's minds!

Virgil: no, i just know them well enough to tell when they’re not ok

Virgil: and theyre sleep deprived rn

Virgil: how late were u up last night?

Microsoft Nerd: That is irrelevant.

VIrgil: its rlly not

Microsoft Nerd: I fell asleep at 6 am.

Virgil: holy shit

Virgil: you had a presentation due?

Microsoft Nerd: Yes. I have been so backlogged with all my work that I am falling behind in my studies.

Virgil: maybe u shouldn’t have gone the double major route

Microsoft Nerd: Ha. That is a funny joke, Virgil. I will not regret this when I am relaxing in my average house witha secure future and I will hold this over your head when you are living in my guest room with your English major.

Virgil: u didn’t tell me u disliked my major!

Microsoft Nerd: Well, now you know. It was an illogical choice that endangers your future. Almost as much as if you had chosen a theater or art major.

Princey: well i'm feeling a bit attacked here.

Pop Star: That’s not very nice 2 say, Logan!

Microsoft Nerd: Patton has made a more logical choice than the both of you, although a future in business is the most vague major you could have selected.

Pop Star: Well I don’t know what I want 2 do! U know this!

Microsoft Nerd: Yes, I do. And I have known my future since I was 10 years old.

Virgil: we should probably try being flexible then

Microsoft Nerd: That is not necessary. Everything will follow its preplanned course.

Virgil: sure it will

Virgil: sry guys. they get like this when they’re sleep deprived. they have no filter whatsoever

Pop Star: It’s ok, we understand! Lo, get some sleep!

Microsoft Nerd: I would already be sleeping if your text messages at 7:30 am had not woken me.

Princey: goodnight, logan.

Microsoft Nerd: Technically, it’s morning. Anyway, farewell.

Virgil: ttyl

Pop Star: See ya!

10/31/XX

11:12 am

Pop Star: What time do u guys wanna meet up?

Princey: probably around 3, yes?

Virgil: sounds good to me

Microsoft Nerd: That is satisfactory.

Pop Star: Okie dokie! See you in an hour or so!

Microsoft Nerd: Farewell.

Princey: adios!

Virgil: bye

10/31/XX

2:44 pm

Anxiety: hey, hows it going?

Janus: It’s going good. What about you

Anxiety: going pretty good. just prepping the costume

Janus: Nice. I bet it’s amazing. What are your friends going as

Anxiety: logan didn’t want to dress up, but i got them a c3po costume that they WILL put on

Anxiety: patton is going as jessie and roman is going as buzz lightyear, like the absolute saps they are

Janus: Nice

Anxiety: what’s ur roommate going as? wb ur half-friend colleague?

Janus: They’re not dressing up.

Anxiety: oh

Anxiety: what’s ur fav candy

Anxiety: hello?

10/31/XX

2:59 pm

Janus: Sorry. Probably Snickers or Butterfingers

Janus: You?

Anxiety: sweet tarts or three musketeers

Janus: Three Musketeers?

Anxiety: theyre immensely underrated

Janus: They’re really not

Anxiety: how dare you yes they are

Janus: Sure. Sweet tarts? Cause of your sweet personality?

Anxiety: how dare you

Anxiety: i am not sweet

Anxiety: i am fearsome and scary

Janus: Right, like the baby emo you are

Anxiety: exactly XP

Anxiety: but still no

Janus: Ok, whatever you say…

Anxiety: why does that sound patronizing

Janus: I’m afraid I don’t know what you’re talking about

Anxiety: that’s a goddamn lie, yessir

Janus: What are you accusing me of

Anxiety: being a goddamn liar

Janus: I’m a goddamn liar, I’m a goddamn liar

Anxiety: I don’t want to care, like I want to care

Janus: Nice

Anxiety: double nice

Janus: Double nice?

Anxiety: omg literally stfu

Janus: What does that even mean?

Anxiety: stopppppp

10/31/XX

3:04 pm

Princey: virgil if you don’t stop blushing and trying to cover your face and giggling, i’ll mess up your makeup!

Virgil: wtf?

Virgil: disregarding most of what u said, why did u text me ur standing right behind me

Microsoft Nerd: We called your name several times. You did not respond.

Virgil: god fuck

Pop Star: Language!

Virgil: english

Pop Star: Haha, very funny.

Virgil: i thought so :)

Princey: LOOK UP OR ELSE ISTG

Virgil: ugh fine drama king

10/31/XX

3:27 pm

Anxiety: success!!!

Janus: What did you succeed at

Anxiety: we managed to convince lo to wear the c3po costume!!!

Janus: Congratulations! I bet they look absolutely wonderful ;)

Anxiety: more like a grumpy person that’s been spray painted gold, but same dif, yk?

Janus: Exactly

Janus: How is your costume coming along

Anxiety: i already finished

Anxiety: [image sent]

Janus: Looking good

Janus: But I don’t get to see your pretty face?

Anxiety: no u don’t get a peek at my ugly ass mug

Janus: Well, I’m sure that’s not true. If your looks are even half as wonderful as your personality, you must be Andrew Garfield

Anxiety: damn i wish

Anxiety: a little less white tho lmfao

Janus: True enough. We all wish to aspire to Andrew Garfield levels of gender envy/attractiveness

Anxiety: exactly

Anxiety: just to be srue 

Janus: Yeah?

Anxiety: ur not lkie rasceist right? beacause u didn’t reosond to my lesss wihte thing so

Janus: No, of course not. I’m a person of color myself, so I would be blind or a huge asshole to be racist

Anxiety: and ur not a hgue asshole

Janus: Most people would disagree with you

Anxiety: they just don’t know u well enough then

Janus: Proclaiming yourself as someone who knows me well, then?

Anxiety: i mean idk i though so but ig nto whatver u say

Janus: I was joking. You are definitely one of the few people who knows me.

Anxiety: kk nice cool

Janus: What’re you up to

Anxiety: waiting for princey and pat to stop making out

Janus: They’re really just making out?

Anxiety: it doesnt take 15 minutes to put on a costume

Anxiety: and their costumes arent even elaborate

Anxiety: slackers

Janus: If they’re slackers, what does that make me?

Anxiety: a halloween heathen, we’ve been over this

Janus: Oh yes, I’d forgotten. Is that my contact?

Anxiety: right now its deceit, but in the spirit of the day, i shall change it to halloween heathen

Anxiety: ugh “shall” y did i use that word

Janus: Now who’s talking like he’s from BCE?

Anxiety: still u

Janus: When did this happen?

Anxiety: a time. shhh now

Janus: Okay…

Anxiety: whatre you doing rn?

Janus: Sitting alone in my room

Anxiety: ooh fun

Janus: A real monkey barrel

Anxiety: lmao

Anxiety: whatre ur plans for tonight?

Janus: Wallow

Anxiety: what?

Janus: What?

Anxiety: fr tho, whatre u doing

Janus: Just sitting around. I’ve got nothing to do. I might take a nap.

Anxiety: ur not watching any halloween movies?

Janus: Probably not

Anxiety: oh. well at least watch the nightmare before christmas and the corpse bride. for me?

Janus: For you.

Anxiety: ok well i gtg bye ttyl

Janus: Oh. Okay then, goodbye.

10/31/XX

3:49 pm

Virgil: guys,,,

Microsoft Nerd: What is it now?

Virgil: patton, roman, i need u too! stop making out and help me!

Princey: you need me? i never thought i’d see the day…

Pop Star: Whaddaya need, kiddo?

Virgil: i might be…

Virgil: just a little bit

Virgil: a teensie weensie bit

Virgil: and almost completely and utterly

Princey: spit it out!

Virgil: gay

Microsoft Nerd: Tell us something we don’t know.

Virgil: i regret trying to teach u what sarcasm is

Princey: you should.

Princey: but you’re talking about dee, right?

Virgil: yeah,,,,,,,,,

Microsoft Nerd: Your face is a very bright shade of red.

Virgil: shut up!!!

Pop Star: Dee? Oh, IDK Virgil…

Virgil: good. because u don’t get to know. u dont get to decide this for me

Princey: ok, i feel like something happened…

Pop Star: Right, OK, I’ll stay out of it. Just be careful, okay?

Virgil: im fine

10/31/XX

6:31 pm

Virgil: yo, where did u losers go? weve been trick or treating for 20 min and ur already gone?

Princey: sorry, v, we’re off on an adventure!

Pop Star: We’ll catch up with u guys in a bit, OK?

Virgil: fine

10/31/XX

8:11 pm

Janus: Today was an adventure.

Janus: I miss you.

Janus: You love Halloween

Janus: And this morning, someone mentioned weblena, and I just froze

Janus: Because I remember you just screaming at the TV about those two

Janus: It was funny, remember?

Janus: I didn’t dress up

Janus: My costume burned anyway so

Janus: Wait…

Janus: Where’s your phone? You don’t have it on you, cause you’ve woken up a few times

Janus: I don’t have it

Janus: Maybe I’m just texting an abandoned number

Janus: And no one will ever get these texts

10/31/XX

8:26 pm

Janus: Anyway

Janus: Goddamn it I really really miss you

Janus: I didn’t watch any horror movies without you

Janus: Just the Corpse Bride and Nightmare Before Christmas

Janus: Goodnight

Chapter Text

11/01/31

7:23 am

Anxiety: im going out of town for the next couple of days, so i wont be able to text much

Janus: I understand. Have fun

Anxiety: thx, bye

11/01/31

7:46 am

Virgil: im going out of town for the next couple of days, so i wont be able to text much

Pop Star: Thx 4 letting us know! Have fun!

Princey: adios.

Microsoft Nerd: May you have a pleasurable respice.

Virgil: im gonna miss u guys

Pop Star: We’re gonna miss u 2, kiddo!

Princey: i mean…

Pop Star: Ro!

Princey: i’m joking! have a nice trip, emo nightmare.

Virgil: thx ro bye guys

11/01/XX

6:22 pm

Logan: Patton, did you understand the philosophy lecture earlier? I was having some trouble with it, and was hoping you could shed some light on the matter.

Janus: I’m not Patton, but I can try my best

Logan: Oh, my apologies, Dee. I did not mean to disturb you.

Janus: No harm, no foul

Logan: Still. I will take my leave now.

Janus: If you do need someone to help you with philosophy, I’m taking philosophy as well. I may be able to help you

Janus: You don’t have to accept of course, it’s only because you helped me with math before, remember?

Logan: All right. May I have your assistance?

Janus: Of course

Incoming call from Logan

Call ended (53:34)

Logan: Thank you for conversing with me, Dee. Your conversation is riveting and your point of view was quite beneficial. I hope we can have a discussion like this again. I apologize that my classes had to pull us away from our discourse.

Janus: It’s quite alright. I enjoyed talking to you too

Janus: Can I message you tomorrow? With Anx out of town, I don’t have much to fill my time, as he is one of the two people I talk to, and the other person is out of commission.

Logan: I would appreciate that. Anx is one of the few people I talk to as well, and the person I am closest with emotionally, so I will most likely find myself alone and unoccupied while he is gone.

Janus: Thank you. Have a good day

Logan: Have a pleasant evening. Goodbye.

11/01/XX

7:41 pm

Prince Charming: hey, love?

Patton: Yeah, sweetheart?

Prince Charming: would you do me the great honor of accompanying me to the movies tonight?

Patton: Of course! That sounds like so much fun, Ro! We haven’t gone on a date in a while.

Prince Charming: a most unfortunate fact.

Patton: Indeed, my good sir.

Patton: LOL

Prince Charming: patton. i love you, but please don’t capitalize lol. i’m begging you.

Patton: Why would it bother u so much LOL?

Prince Charming: wow i am cringing so hard. like virgil levels of oof.

Patton: LOL

Prince Charming: i’ll pick you up at 9.

Patton: <3

Prince Charming: <3

11/01/XX

8:49 pm

Janus: I miss you

Janus: I am so so sorry that I was only able to come by for a few minutes today

Janus: I had an exam and other shit going on

Janus: I know I’m rambling

Janus: I feel really bad though

Janus: I love you

Janus: Wake up

Janus: I’m sorry

11/01/XX

9:18 pm

Patton: How ru liking the movie?

Prince Charming: it’s a tad boring. sorry, heart, i hadn’t intended to choose a boring movie.

Patton: It’s fine, don’t worry! We can chat during the movie, and talk about it and whatever random stuff we want 2!

Prince Charming: fair point. so, what do you wish to discuss?

Patton: How were ur classes today?

Prince Charming: they were awful, as usual.

Patton: Aw, I’m sorry, honey. What made them so awful?

Prince Charming: everything. but my first class was taught by the dragon witch.

Patton: Ms. Drakon?

Prince Charming: the dragon witch.

Patton: OK then.

Patton: She’s the 1 who failed u on that project a while ago?

Prince Charming: yep. she’s the WORST.

Patton: I’m really sorry that u had her 1st thing. That’s not a great way 2 start off the day.

Prince Charming: nope. she kinda ruined my mood for the rest of the day, and therefore all my other classes.

Patton: That’s 2 bad.

Prince Charming: like this movie.

Patton: LOL

Prince Charming: your laugh is a blessing on this moral realm.

Patton: Oh, stop, ur just saying that.

Prince Charming: i’m really not. you’re the best thing in my life.

Patton: Ur making me blush. And I doubt that, there’s gotta be better things, u know?

Prince Charming: good. your blush is so beautiful, like dawn’s rosy fingers reaching up and filling the sky. and there really isn’t. there hasn’t been for years now.

Patton: Oh, u just stole that from Ancient Greek literature.

Prince Charming: doesn’t make it any less true.

11/01/22

6:31 pm

Patton: I know we’ve only been dating 4 five months but u never really talk about ur past or ur family.

Prince Charming: no, i don’t.

Patton: Do u want 2?

Prince Charming: i’m not sure.

Patton: I won’t give advice or comfort or anything if u don’t want me 2. I’m here 2 listen.

Prince Charming: okay. and you don’t need to do anything more than listen, but if you wanted to, that would be fine.

Patton: I’ll do my best. <3

Prince Charming: <3

Prince Charming: i guess i’ll start from the beginning of my life.

Prince Charming: i was born in madrid, spain. my father had some shares in a large company, and he was a partner in another successful business, so we had plenty of money.

Prince Charming: when i was five years old, we moved to the united states.

Prince Charming: spanish is my first language.

Prince Charming: anyway, we moved to the united states and, obviously, i’ve lived here ever since.

Prince Charming: my parents weren’t around a lot when we were kids. my father always had meetings and work and other business stuff to do.

Prince Charming: my mother didn’t really like children and she avoided us at all costs, even when we got older. we had a rotating cycle of nannies and governesses, the kind of stuff you only see on tv, except real.

Patton: I’m sorry 2 butt in, but u keep saying “we”. Who’s included in this “we”?

Prince Charming: me and my brother.

Patton: Ur brother?

Prince Charming: my twin brother, remus.

Patton: U have a twin?

Prince Charming: yeah…

Patton: Y didn’t u tell me?

Prince Charming: i don’t really have a good excuse. i guess that if you’d known, you would’ve asked questions, and i don’t really like talking about this.

Patton: OK

Patton: What if he’d shown up and taken ur place, like the Parent Trap or those kids books about twins switching places?

Prince Charming: we’re fraternal twins, so we don’t look very alike. his skin and hair are darker, and he has freckles and green eyes.

Patton: Oh, that’s cool.

Prince Charming: yeah. anyway, my mother wasn’t around a ton, so we were generally neglected. remus and i both had our ways of trying for their attention. i tried my best to be academic and good and follow a plan my father had mentioned to me the few times he spoke to me.

Prince Charming: remus acted out. he drank, smoked, stayed out, had sex, etc. etc.

Prince Charming: one time when  we were fifteen he ended up at the police station after a dwi.

Prince Charming: for the first time ever, my parents paid attention to him.

Prince Charming: but not in a very good way.

Prince Charming: before that night, i’d never imagined my mother as abusive.

Prince Charming: and she technically wasn’t.

Prince Charming: she

Prince Charming: well, she beat him, and he ran away a week later.

Prince Charming: abuse is like bullying, right?

Prince Charming: like, it has to be repetetive to count?

Prince Charming: right?

Patton: I don’t think that’s true, sweetie. I’m pretty sure that, no matter how often, getting physically or emotionally injured by a parent is abuse. Did anythng ever happen 2 u?

Prince Charming: no, after that night i made even more sure that i was the perfect son. they never touched me, thankfully.

Patton: OK, I’m glad.

Prince Charming: yeah. when i was 17 both of my parents died in a car accident and left me a lot of money.

Prince Charming: i’m going to donate most of it to charities, but i’m also going to set some aside for housing and such, after i graduate.

Prince Charming: they didn’t leave any money to my brother.

Prince Charming: and since they took away both of our phones, his when he was punished and mine when he ran away, i don’t know what his phone number is and i can’t contact him.

Prince Charming: i haven’t talked to him since he left.

Patton: I’m so sorry, sweetheart.

Prince Charming: can we go? this isn’t a very good movie and i’m a loud crier.

Patton: Of course, love. Let’s go.

 Prince Charming: thank you.

Chapter Text

11/02/XX

10:23 am

Janus: Good morning, Logan

Logan: Salutations, Dee. How has your morning been?

Janus: It’s been going good. Just finished a class

Logan: What class?

Janus: Oh, one of my business classes

Logan: Are you majoring in business?

Janus: Minor

Logan: I see.

Janus: What about you

Logan: I am taking a few classes to prepare myself for law school. Namely political science, public speaking, philosophy, business, economics, and government, with a few pleasure classes, such as astronomy, ASL, English literature, and psychology.

Janus: That’s a lot

Logan: Yes.

Janus: Are you sure that’s what you want to do?

Logan: I am certain.

Janus: You won’t get burnt out or anything?

Logan: I do not believe so.

Logan: For future reference, what exactly does being “burnt out” entail?

Janus: It’s a lot of things, but it includes exhaustion, depression, dissatisfaction, irritability, trouble focusing, insomnia, headaches, high blood pressure and absenteeism.

Logan: I see. Thank you.

Janus: Of course. If you’re feeling burnt out, don’t hesitate to reach out. We cover a lot of things like this in my psychology class, and sometimes hearing an outside opinion can help

Logan: I believe I will. Thank you very much, Dee.

Janus: You’re welcome.

Logan: Have a good afternoon.

Janus: You too, bye.

11/02/XX

12:11 pm

Patton: Hey, sweetie, u feeling up 2 come down 2 lunch? I haven’t seen u since last night.

Prince Charming: sorry, but i’m busy.

Patton: What ru busy with?

Patton: Maybe I can help u?

Prince Charming: no thanks.

Patton: What ru doing?

Prince Charming: i’m looking for my brother

Patton: Oh, wow. That’s a big step. Ur sure about this?

Prince Charming: why wouldn’t i be?

Patton: Oh, nevermind. No reason.

Prince Charming: patton. what reason?

Patton: Well…

Patton: While u lost his number when he left, did he lose urs?

Prince Charming: no. he memorized every number on his phone, and i never knew why until he was gone.

Patton: Well, if he had ur number all this time, y didn’t he text u sooner? Or look 4 u on social media?

Patton: Sweetie?

Prince Charming: i need to go.

Patton: OK, but just remember I’m here if u need.

Patton: Sorry. I’m sure that isn’t the case. He probably just forgot ur number or something.

Patton: Love u.

11/02/XX

1:56 pm

Anxiety: hey, i just got away from my fam and i wanted to check in on u

Anxiety: hows it going

Janus: It’s going well

Anxiety: whats been happening

Janus: Not much. I’ve texted Logan a little bit

Anxiety: oh

Anxiety: that’s

Anxiety: that’s great

Anxiety: it’s nice to see you guys talk, i thought you would get along well

Janus: Yeah, sure. We have similar classes, so we usually discuss them

Anxiety: oh cool!

Janus: What have you been doing in…?

Anxiety: oh, in florida. i have some family there.

Janus: That’s cool

Janus: You having fun?

Anxiety: as much fun as you can have at a family reunion

Anxiety: i miss my gma

Anxiety: she made all of these bearable

Anxiety: now i have to sit through days of misgendering and homophobic comments

Anxiety: it’sa literal helll

Janus: I’m sorry

Janus: Tell me more about your grandma

Anxiety: she was the best

Anxiety: she died when i was 12

Anxiety: before i came out, obv

Anxiety: but ik she woulve been supportive

Anxiety: prboably

Janus: I’m sure she would’ve

Anxiety: she lived close to where i’d growwn up so i saw her all the time

Anxiety: we used to cook and bake for hours

Anxiety: and she’d teach me italian

Anxiety: oh right, i’m southern italian

Anxiety: anyway shed teach me italian

Anxiety: that was only when i was younger tho

Anxiety: when i was about 10, her health ogt worse and she was digwnosed with stge 2 skin cance

Anxiety: she lived for another year and a hlaf, barley making it a wek pst her 87th bday

Anxiety: i rlly miss hre

Anxiety: so so mcuh

Janus: She sounds wonderful

Anxiety: wby? ur gma, ur fam?

Janus: I don’t have a grandma, or a family, really

Anxiety: oh im sry, i souldntve asummed

Janus: It’s fine, you didn’t know any better

Anxiety: still

Janus: Do you have anyone who supports you at these things?

Anxiety: my mom tries heer best, but she can’t rly stand up to her dad, so not much chnges when she tries stuff

Anxiety: my dad doesn’t even try

Anxiety: but i have a younger cousin whos great

Anxiety: they try their best

Anxiety: and i do the same for them

Anxiety: me and remy gotta stick together

Janus: It’s nice that you have someone to support you

Anxiety: do u have someone to support u? the way u say that sounds like u don’t

Janus: I do, don’t worry. I just didn’t for most of my life

Anxiety: i’m sry

Janus: It’s fine, not much anyone can do about it

Anxiety: yeah, ig

Janus: I have to go, sorry, class

Anxiety: oh yeah bye

Janus: Goodbye. Have fun on your vacation

11/02/XX

2:06 pm

Virgil: hey guys, i have a few min to talk

Virgil: whats up

Pop Star: Nothing much around here! What about u? How’s ur trip going?

Virgil: its going meh

Virgil: u know my family

Pop Star: I thought Remy was nice!

Virgil: no u didn’t

Pop Star: I thought it was nice how Remy supported u

Virgil: now that is probably true

Virgil: but u dont like them

Pop Star: I can’t say I’m a fan of their attitude, but I also can’t change them. They can act whichever way the wind blows.

Virgil: does that even make sense?

Pop Star: Of course it does! I’m a windly witty worker.

Microsoft Nerd: To answer your question, Virgil, that does not make any sense.

Virgil: hi lo, i’ve missed u

Microsoft Nerd: I have also found myself offput and devoid of your company.

Virgil: ive particularly missed the way you phrase things

Microsoft Nerd: I have been taking solace in Dee’s company. They entertain riveting conversation and brilliant intelligence.

Virgil: oh really huh?

Virgil: that’s cool

Virgil: dee said u guys mostly talked about school, but i guess thats not true, huh?

Microsoft Nerd: It is not necessarily untrue. We have spoken of school, particularly our courses and overwork, but Dee also gave me some interesting advice on mental health and a new perspective on a philosophical debate. I quite enjoy conversing with him.

Virgil: yeah, i do too

Pop Star: I just really think u guys should be careful…

Virgil: shut up

Pop Star: OK, sorry.

Princey: am i really the only person who has not spoken to dee?

Virgil: seems like it

Princey: why don’t you just add him to a group chat or something?

Princey: one with all of us.

Pop Star: Good idea!

Virgil: no

Microsoft Nerd: This matter is up to Virgil and Dee. You cannot make this desicion for them.

Virgil: u dont get to talk to dee

Virgil: i didnt even want pat to talk to dee

Virgil: and lo and dee only talk because dee needed math help

Virgil: so its not like a friend thing

Microsoft Nerd: I might disagree.

Virgil: nope be quiet

Microsoft Nerd: You can be quite aggravating. I have a presentation, I will be silencing my phone for the next hour.

Virgil: see ya

Princey: okay, but still. what if i want to know him? to talk to him? to find out if he’s good enough for you?

Virgil: yeah not happening

Virgil: i gtg

Virgil: but if you get dee’s number somehow i will kill you

Virgil: not joking

Princey: i’m afraid.

Virgil: u should be

Virgil: bye

Princey: bonjour.

Pop Star: See u l8r!

Virgil: oml so cringe

11/02/XX

7:29 pm

Prince Charming: so i’ve been thinking all day. 

Prince Charming: and i’ve decided to look for him anyway. 

Prince Charming: maybe he doesn’t want to see me. 

 Prince Charming: but i want to at least try. 

Prince Charming: rejection would be better than this limbo.

Patton: Whatever u want 2 do, I'll be here 2 support u.

Prince Charming: thank you, love. for being here. and listening.

Patton: I always will.

Prince Charming: i’m gonna go do some research in social media first. care to join me?

Patton: If u’ll have me! Want me 2 come over or call?

Prince Charming: no, if that’s alright.

Patton: That’s just fine! We can text if ur more comfy with that.

Prince Charming: please. let’s start with instasnap

Patton: OK! So, what’s his full name?

Prince Charming: well, his full name is very long, but remus was never a fan of spanish naming customs, so any social media accounts will be under remus reyes. also because that might exceed the character limit.

Prince Charming: if he has social media under his name, anyway. i think he will though.

Patton: OK! Let’s get searching.

Prince Charming: text when you find something.

Patton: “Professor Remus Reyes, New Gainesburg University”?

Prince Charming: nope.

Patton: “Remus Holland-Reyes, owner of fast food franchise McReyes’s”?

Prince Charming: possibly? probably not, but send me the link on instasnap anyway.

Patton: Sent!

Prince Charming: not him.

Patton: Darn. “Remus and Romulous Reyes, owners of the Quickercut Hair Salon”?

Prince Charming: no.

Patton: “Remus Reyes, captain of the New Gainesburg Hockeyball team”?

Prince Charming: send me the link.

Patton: OK.

Prince Charming: not him.

Patton: Some of these pages will download viruses on my computer if I click on them. Do u think he’d be on a porn site?

Prince Charming: i don’t think he’d use his name on a porn site, so don’t click.

Patton: OK. “Remus Carter Reyes, curator of the Darville Music History Museum”?

Prince Charming: nope.

Patton: Who knew there could be so many Remus Reyeses in the world?

Prince Charming: idk.

Prince Charming: let’s move to facepage.

Patton: OK.

Patton: “Remus Reyes, volunteer at the animal shelter”?

Prince Charming: no.

Patton: “Remus Reyes, microbiologist”?

Prince Charming: nope.

Patton: “Remus G. Reyes, owner of the Flora and Fauna flower shop”?

Prince Charming: not him.

Patton: “Officer Remi Reyes, member of the NGPD”?

Prince Charming: we’re never going to find him.

Patton: Don’t give up. U said he had gotten in an accident when he went to jail? Could we check news articles? Starting with closest 2 our area and then going outward?

Prince Charming: okay.

Patton: “Remus Keith Reyes-Baca, arrested for homicide”?

Prince Charming: send me the link.

Patton: Is it him?

Prince Charming: nope.

Patton: “Remus Reyes, spray painted the mayor’s house”?

Prince Charming: ooh, maybe. link?

Prince Charming: isn’t him.

Patton: Wait, maybe this is it. He looks a lot like u.

Prince Charming: could be.

Patton: “Remus Reyes, hospitalized in house fire”?

Prince Charming: send me the page.

Patton: Is it him?

Patton: Ro?

Patton: Sweetie?

Prince Charming: it’s him.

Patton: It’s him???

Prince Charming: it’s him

Patton: OMG u found ur brother!

Prince Charming: holy mother of cheeze-its i found my brother.

Patton: Find what hospital he’s at!

Prince Charming: well, this happened in topsfield, which is only 20 min away. just gotta check all the hospitals for my brother.

Patton: Let’s get started!

11/02/XX

7:42 pm

Prince Charming: he’s not at odomshill.

Patton: Leevale was a bust.

Prince Charming: lampston was also a bust.

Patton: He’s not at Leo’s Children’s Hospital (IDK why he would be) or Dahlian.

Prince Charming: i found him! he’s at joantown.

Patton: What ru waiting 4? Let’s go!

Prince Charming: but it’s 30 min away. visiting hours will be over by the time we get there.

Patton: Let’s go tomorrow then! When do visiting hours begin?

Prince Charming: 10:45 am

Patton: OK, then we have a plan. Do u want me 2 come with u?

Prince Charming: i would love that, but don’t you have a test tomorrow?

Patton: The test is not as important as being there 4 u.

Prince Charming: i’ll be fine on my own. this test is important.

Patton: If ur sure.

Prince Charming: i am sure.

Patton: OK then. I do have 2 go study 4 this test, so I have 2 go, but I love u and tomorrow is going 2 go wonderfully. <3

Prince Charming: love you too, goodnight. <3

11/02/XX

8:11 pm

Janus: I’ll be there in the morning

Janus: Like always

Janus: Just want to reassure you of that

Janus: Even though you probably already know that

Janus: At least I hope you know that

Janus: I really hope you know that

Janus: If you don’t, I’ve failed at my only job

Janus: Just please be okay.

Janus: I have this feeling…

Janus: Nevermind.

Janus: I love you

Janus: Goodnight.

Chapter Text

11/03/XX

8:32 am
Patton: Good morning, sweetie! <3

Prince Charming: morning, dear heart. <3

Patton: How are u feeling?

Prince Charming: really, really freaked out.

Patton: Because of visiting?

Prince Charming: yeah.

Patton: U know u don’t have 2 go today.

Patton: U have plenty of time.

Prince Charming: but it’s been so long.

Patton: And he can wait a little longer.

Patton: If ur not ready 2 see him, don’t.

Patton: U don’t have 2.

Prince Charming: i don’t?

Patton: No, u don’t.

Prince Charming: i don’t think i will go today. maybe tomorrow.

Patton: I would offer 2 go with u, but I have ANOTHER test tomorrow!

Prince Charming: that’s all right love.

Prince Charming: i’ll be okay.

Patton: <3

Prince Charming: <3

Patton: I GTG, but I’ll TTYL!

Prince Charming: bye.

11/03/XX

10:35 am

Anxiety: im getting home tomorrow!!!

Janus: Someone’s excited

Anxiety: yesssss

Anxiety: i love my family and i love florida, but i miss my tiny apartment, yk?

Janus: Yeah, I think I do

Anxiety: i also wish wed gone back to italy for the reunion

Anxiety: but w my gparents dead, there was no reason

Janus: I know you didn’t go there for sightseeing, but have you ever gone sightseeing?

Anxiety: yeah, i have

Janus: Where have you been

Anxiety: i went to rome and venice

Anxiety: one time my cousin dragged me to a fashion show in milan

Janus: Wow

Anxiety: no idea where they got the money for that cause it sure as hell wasnt from their job at a coffee shop

Anxiety: or from their family

Anxiety: u know, i should probably figure out how they got that money…

Janus: Lol

Anxiety: lmfao

Janus: Are you flying back

Anxiety: nope, driving

Anxiety: flying gives me wayyyyyy too much anxiety

Janus: Who would’ve guessed

Anxiety: is my name in ur phone still anxiety?

Janus: Is my name in your phone still slimy snek boi?

Anxiety: maybe

Janus: Well there’s your answer

Anxiety: what do u want ur name to be?

Janus: I don’t really care. You know what I go by, and so I don’t have an opinion on your contact name for me

Janus: It could be a bunch of sparkle emojis for all I care

Anxiety: i am so adding a snake emoji

Anxiety: never mind i literally cannot take emojis seriously

Janus: I thought so

Anxiety: oh fuck off

Janus: You love me <3

11/03/XX

10:56 am

Janus: Hello?

Anxiety: what

Janus: Are you okay

Janus: It’s been a couple minutes

Anxiety: yeah im fine sry

Janus: It’s okay

Janus: You’re sure you’re alright?

Anxiety: yeah, im better than alright

Janus: What’s that mean

Anxiety: nothing nvm

Janus: Okay…

Janus: Relatable though

Anxiety: whats that mean

Janus: Nothing of course

Anxiety: ur a very suspicious person

Janus: Thank you

Janus: I do try my best

Anxiety: ur succeeding

Anxiety: ur also a very mysterious person

Anxiety: sometimes

Janus: ?

Anxiety: i wonder how much of everything youve told me is true

Anxiety: and what ur not telling me

Janus: Oh

Anxiety: sry! i gtg, auntie being a bitchhhhhh bye!

Janus: Bye…

11/03/XX

11:47 am

Princey: hey, virgil?

Virgil: yea?

Virgil: ru alright?

Virgil: u don’t usually text me privately unlses its serios

Princey: i need your help.

Virgil: with waht

Princey: i’m having an anxiety attack.

Virgil: you are?

Princey: can we call?

Virgil: of course

Incoming call from Princey

Call ended (9:19)

Virgil: im glad ur calmer now

Princey: yeah, thanks again.

Virgil: why did u come to me?

Princey: because i know you get anxiety attacks, and patton and logan don’t.

Virgil: but they both know what to do

Virgil: i usually go to patton when im having a panic attack and shit

Princey: this particular panic attack may or may not have been caused by something patton said.

Virgil: oh

Princey: yeah.

Virgil: that makes sense then

Virgil: do u wanna talk about it?

Virgil: u dont have to, ik were not on the best trems but it doesnt suond like you can vent to patton, even if ur gonna have to confid e in him and idk how u feel baout logan so

Princey: i’d like to.

Princey: if you’re really sure that i can.

Virgil: of course i am

Princey: thank you.

Princey: look…

Princey: it’s a long story, but i have a twin brother.

Virgil: wow. ok

Princey: yeah…

Princey: he’s in the hospital right now, and me and patton found out which one.

Princey: and he’s had the means to contact me over the years, whereas i have not.

Princey: but he hasn’t ever reached out.

Princey: and patton pointed this out to me.

Princey: so what if he doesn’t want to see me?

Princey: i probably did something to make him hate me.

Virgil: look, dude

Virgil: you cant change other peoples opinions

Virgil: and you cant predict the outcome of you meeting up w him

Virgil: and it might go wrong

Princey: thank you, you’re so comforting.

Virgil: but it might go right!

Virgil: and wouldnt u rather try ur best to reach out to him and make sure of what happened

Virgil: instead of not taking the chance

Virgil: and regretting that u didnt ur whole life

Virgil: especially if hes in the hospital

Virgil: and u might not have all the time u want to be able to gather ur courage or whatever bullshit excuses

Virgil: i thought u were brave

Princey: i don’t know if i am.

Virgil: do u want to be?

Princey: i think i do.

Virgil: then u have to work for that and prove it

Virgil: be brave

Virgil: take a chance

Princey: when did you get so smart?

Virgil: fuck you

Princey: thank you though, for real.

Princey: you’ve been a huge help today.

Princey: i can’t even describe what you’ve given me.

Princey: what you’ve done for me.

Virgil: dont sweat it

Virgil: anyone would do the same

Princey: not really.

Princey: but okay.

Princey: i have to go, but thank you again.

Virgil: see u later

Princey: see you.

11/03/XX

3:31 pm

Janus: I’m not going to be able to make it today

Janus: Fuck, sorry

Janus: I have an exam

Janus: Please be alright

Janus: Goodbye.

Janus: I love you.

Chapter Text

11/04/XX

9:30 am

Patton: Good morning, honey.

Prince Charming: good morning, my love.

Patton: How ru feeling?

Prince Charming: really really nervous.

Patton: Come on now, that’s Virgil’s job.

Prince Charming: someone’s gotta fill his role while he’s gone.

Patton: LOL.

Prince Charming: i’m going to the hospital today.

Patton: That’s a big step. I’m proud of u. Only do it if u feel like ur ready though!

Prince Charming: i think i am.

Prince Charming: i hope so, at least.

Patton: When ru going 2 head out?

Prince Charming: 15 minutes or so.

Patton: Ur absolutely sure u don’t want me 2 come?

Prince Charming: of course i want you to come, but i don’t want you to miss your class. i will be fine and i’ll text you when i’m back.

Patton: If ur sure. Good luck, sweetie, I love u so much. Sorry, but I have 2 get 2 my class rn. See u. <3

Prince Charming: goodbye, love you too. <3

11/04/XX

10:42 am

Anxiety: hey, whatre u up to?

Janus: I’m driving to go visit someone

Janus: And I apologize, but I’m already late, and in heavy traffic. Talk to you later?

Anxiety: no prob. ttyl

11/04/XX

10:53 am

Janus: There’s someone here.

Janus: Do you know him?

Janus: I don’t, but who knows who you haven’t shown me.

Janus: Could he be your father? Brother? Relative?

Janus: And he’s coming my way.

11/04/XX
11:49 pm

Microsoft Nerd: Would anyone care to explain why this table is so empty?

Virgil: i am, in fact, driving home

Microsoft Nerd: I know that, don’t sass me.

Virgil: fine mom

Pop Star: Sorry, Lo! I have 2 study, but I’ll be there tomorrow!

Princey: i’m downtown right now, but i’ll be back in 45 min or so.

Microsoft Nerd: And no one thought to notify me. You all are the most vexing people I’ve ever met.

Pop Star: So sorry! :(

Virgil: lmfao i can hear ur sigh lo

Microsoft Nerd: Go pester Remy and leave me alone.

Virgil: peace losers

Princey: i’m not sorry. i don’t have to report to you. you’re not my mom.

Pop Star: Sweetie, he didn’t mean it like that.

Microsoft Nerd: Why the sudden hostility?

Princey: stop micromanaging us

Microsoft Nerd: I apologize that I would like to be included and informed of people’s decisions that impact me, but I can see why you would not be able to comprehend that much you simpleton.

Princey: i don’t have to tell you anything that’s going on in my life!

Microsoft Nerd: I wouldn’t wish that on my worst enemy.

Princey: fuck you!

Microsoft Nerd: The sentiment has been fully and equivocally reciprocated, you insensitive piece of a rabid beaver’s rancid fecal matter.

Pop Star: No…

Princey: what the hell does that mean?

Microsoft Nerd: Fuck you too, you piece of disgusting beaver shit.

Princey: i would literally murder you if i wasn’t across town.

Princey: i’d watch my back if i were you.

Princey: go fuck yourself you useless whore.

Pop Star: Language… guys, please…

Microsoft Nerd: You don’t have any way to make me hurt.

Princey: we’ll see about that.

Pop Star: no…

Virgil: damn lo, u might wanna be careful, roman didnt explode, which is even more dangerous than if he had

Microsoft Nerd: I’m fine.

11/04/XX

12:02 pm

Patton: Sweetie, ru alright?

Prince Charming: i don’t wanna talk about it.

Patton: Oh, OK.

Prince Charming: text you later.

Patton: Love you <3

11/04/XX

12:34 pm

Prince Charming: i’m back…

Patton: How did it go?

Prince Charming: there’s a lot.

Patton: What happened?

Prince Charming: where do i even start?

Patton: How bout from the beginning?

Prince Charming: i showed up at the hospital and found his room, easy enough. 

Prince Charming: a couple of minutes after i arrived, this other person showed up. 

Prince Charming: i don’t really know who they are. never seen them before.

Prince Charming: they looked scary, with long dark hair and a huge huge scar on their face.

Patton: He could’ve made friends?

Prince Charming: this person, he paused and got onto his phone when he got to the door and saw me.

Prince Charming: then he came in and asked me who i was and why i was here.

Prince Charming: i kinda dodged around the question and asked who he was.

Prince Charming: he said his name was dee.

Patton: He what?

Prince Charming: i don’t know how common of a name that is, but that’s only one of the points.

Patton: OK.

Prince Charming: he asked me who i was, so i told him my name.

Prince Charming: he knew who i was.

Prince Charming: at least, after i told him my name.

Prince Charming: so i asked how he knew remus.

Prince Charming: he said that he was remus’s roommate.

Prince Charming: and he knew i was his brother.

Prince Charming: then he sat down and kinda glared at me.

Prince Charming: i asked him why a roommate would care so much and know who i was.

Prince Charming: some not so kind words were exchanged, but he said that he was also remus’s partner.

Patton: So if he is the same Dee as the 1 Virgil knows, then he has a boyfriend.

Patton: Virgil’s gonna be crushed.

Prince Charming: i’m not sure if this guy is gonna be good for remus. he kept saying “it” when referring to remus, which is objectifying him!

Patton: That is concerning…

Patton: How ru feeling?

Prince Charming: weird?

Patton: How so?

Prince Charming: it’s just that remus has had a whole life that has gone on.

Prince Charming: he’s had a boyfriend, for god’s sake!

Prince Charming: and i haven’t been a part of any of it.

Prince Charming: i haven’t been there.

Patton: That’s not ur fault.

Prince Charming: i could’ve done something before now.

Prince Charming: i could’ve looked sooner.