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Louis knows he’s not supposed to run in hospitals, and up until now he’d understood that rule. It makes logical sense really, don’t’ run or you might get hurt and essentially end up in a bed yourself.
Simple, really.
But really, it’s not that simple anymore. Not right now when he desperately needs to get to the east wing located on the 700th floor, right at the back of the hospital or some other shit that Louis isn’t sure about. Either way he knows he needs to get somewhere, quickly.
He’s been getting dirty looks from visitors and mothers who clearly think he shouldn’t be running, and he’s been told off by two different nurses which he sheepishly smiled at, slowed down his pace and then went back into a sprint as soon as they were out of sight.
Logic really.
It’s just, Louis is panicking. Like, really panicking. He needs to get there. Fast.
Finally he reaches the corridor he needs to and he sees one of their bodyguards Paddy waiting in the hall, one of his hands is bandaged up and he’s got a split lip. He looks mostly okay, a bit battered and bruised but essentially okay.
“Where is he?” Louis demands, as kindly as he can but he’s not in the right frame of mind for nice.
Paddy is a bit stunned when he sees him but composes himself and claps his giant hand on Louis’s tiny little shoulder, “He’s in surgery right now, they won’t tell me anything.”
Louis is stunned into silence, “But…what…how. Is he okay?”
Paddy gives him a sad smile, but it doesn’t reach his eyes and Louis can see how afraid he truly is behind his eyes, “I’m sure he will be.”
-/-/-/-/-
Louis is puttering around his house aimlessly when he gets the call, 1:46pm on a Thursday. His phone rings with news that makes his stomach want to convulse into itself.
He should have something better to do on a Thursday at 2pm really.
“Hello?” He picks up aimlessly, making himself a cup of tea.
“You need to get down to the hospital, now. And call the other boys,” The voice on the line is urgent and demanding and who even is this?
“Sorry what?” Louis brings the phone away from his face and checks who called him. Confused he reads Paddy’s name, and then it takes him a millisecond to piece the puzzle together.
“What happened?” Louis demands.
“There was an accident, another car come out of nowhere. We were just getting take out, Louis hurry. He’ll be out of surgery soon,” He’s never heard the older man sound so desperate and pleading before.
“I – okay.” Is all Louis said.
“I’ve already called his parents they’re on their way from Wolverhampton now. And everyone on the team who needs to know does. I need you to call the boys though, get them down to the hospital.”
“I – is he okay?” Louis asked, stomach dropping.
There’s a pause, “They won’t tell me anything. It could be nothing, but I didn’t want to take any chances.”
Louis nods into the phone even though he can’t see it, “alright.”
He hangs up without a goodbye, grabs his coat and keys and quickly heads to the car, leaving a half made cup on tea on his kitchen counter to go cold.
-/-/-/-/-/-
In the car he calls Harry first, because he doesn’t know how to deal with the other two just yet.
“Hello?” A slow drawl answers and Louis rolls his eyes at his Bluetooth device as he breaks probably five road rules while trying to drive as safely as possible.
“You need to get down to London’s hospital ASAP. It’s Liam.” Louis demands. Saying it aloud hurts.
Suddenly Harry’s voice is urgent, “What? What happened? Is he okay?”
“I don’t know anything, I just know we need to get to the hospital. Now.” With that he hangs up and doesn’t say anything else, he’s not sure what else he can say.
He calls Zayn next and there’s no answer, he probably shouldn’t have expected one. He’s probably asleep.
He can deal with that later.
He calls Niall next and rings twice before he is greeted with a loud, “Tommo! What do I owe the pleasure,”
“You need to come to London. There’s been an accident, Liam’s in hospital. I don’t know how bad yet. I don’t know anything. But I think it’s serious.” Louis says as quickly and as even as possible. He has to get himself together.
“Wait, what? Liam?” Niall asks slowly. Louis lets out a frustrated sigh.
“I don’t know anything yet Niall I’m on the way to the hospital now, I just – “ He cuts off because he doesn’t know what to say.
Niall’s in Ireland right now and it won’t be easy to get to London. And it will be stupid if Liam’s not even that hurt and he comes down for nothing. But what if he is really hurt? What if this isn’t just a minor accident that leaves Liam with a few cuts and bruises.
Niall will never forgive him if he doesn’t tell him to come down to London, even for a bump on the head. This is Liam they’re talking about.
Louis is freaking out and he’s not doing a great job at hiding it.
“Okay, okay just relax. Get to the hospital. I’ll be there as soon as I can,” Niall says and Louis smiles gratefully at the phone.
“Okay,” Is all he says and Niall hangs up.
Louis knows even if nothing is really wrong, Niall will fly down anyway.
Because, because this is Liam.
Liam doesn’t get hurt.
-/-/-/-/-/
He’s been waiting in the ER for about 30 minutes before Harry shows up, he looks frazzled in his skinny jeans and shirt that’s only buttoned about half way up his chest. But he’s still calm and dazzling when he asks a nurse about Liam Payne and he’s pointed into the direction of Paddy pacing the room and Louis sat ridged on a plastic chair.
Harry easily elopes Louis in his arms and it’s the safest he’s felt in an hour. The embrace doesn’t last long enough before he’s turning to Paddy and frowning.
“How is he?” He asks.
Louis just shrugs helplessly, he has no idea. No one’s even spoken to him since he got here, he’s just watched Paddy pace up and down for 30 long minutes. He feels dizzy.
“What happened exactly?” Harry directs to the body guard. They love Paddy, they love all there body guards, but Louis can tell Harry’s got his business face on and if Paddy has done anything to put Liam’s life in danger he isn’t going to hesitate to find a new one.
Liam would probably protest, but Liam’s lost the right to protest right not.
“We were driving down the main road to get take out, when a car ran a red and ran straight into the passenger side. I was barely impacted but Liam wasn’t conscious, when the ambos arrived he wasn’t there. They took us straight to the hospital and into surgery, they were trying in the ambulance to get him back up but. I’ve been out here waiting since,” Paddy explained.
Louis sighed, it wasn’t Paddy fault. It wasn’t anyone’s fault. Except the driver that ran a red, and Louis will make sure he gets what’s coming to him. But at the moment all he can think about is Liam. Their Liam.
Their wonderful, bubbly, adorable, crinkly eyed Liam who doesn’t get sick, or injured or hurt. The one who goes on stage no matter rain hail or shine. The one that keeps them all together and grounded like the metaphorical rock he is. The one who would know exactly what to say in this situation, the one who usually handles these situations.
They have no idea how serious the accident was or if he’s even going to be okay, and its killing Louis not being able to do anything but wait.
“They’ll tell us soon, I’m sure,” Harry says confidently but Louis can see the tremble in his eyes.
“I couldn’t get hold of Zayn, in the car I called but –“ Louis starts but Harry cuts him off.
“It’s okay, I called Ant and got hold of them. He’s coming down now but they were a bit out. And Niall’s booked a plane at 5, he’ll be here as soon as he can,” Harry says and in that moment Louis could kiss him.
Louis nods steadily. Okay.
-/-/-/-/-/-
“Payne? Family of Liam Payne?” A doctor walks out in the hall and instantly the group they’ve formed stand up. Zayn and Ant arrived not long after Harry and Louis hasn’t seen Zayn this terrified since they lost the X-factor. Already he’s a shell of himself with worry and there’s nothing Louis can do. Harry keeps fumbling nervously with his shirt and Louis is sure he’s going to break all the buttons on it soon if they don’t hear about Liam.
“We’re his family,” Louis says determined and the doctor looks sceptical.
“I can only talk to family,” he persists but Paddy speaks up.
“Look his a 21 year old pop star and I’m the body guard assignment to him and these are his bandmates, his parents are on the way from Wolverhampton and they’ll be here as soon as they can but at the moment we’re his family and we really need to know his okay,” Paddy says in a far more rational voice then Louis can master.
The doctor sighs, but gives them a sad smile and complies far too easily. Louis wonders if he’s heard of One Direction before.
“Liam’s condition is not good, but he’s been stabilized. We had to revitalise him and had to drain the toxins from his stomach when his kidney was injured. We’ve managed to stabilize him now however. We managed to get him breathing on his own, but there is still fear of brain injury,” He explains.
“Brain injury?” Zayn repeats weakly.
“He hasn’t woken up yet, but he is expected to in the next 48 hours. We honestly can’t tell until he does wake up however, it wasn’t a minor accident. We’ve done all we can for the moment,” The doctor explains.
An eerie silence fills the room, “Can we see him?” Harry asks hopefully.
The doctor sighs, “Yes, he’s been moved to a private room. There are a few legal issues I’ll need to go over though,”
“I’ll do it,” Paddy volunteers, “You boys go ahead. I’ll make a few calls as well.”
They all nod and follow the doctor to the room, minus Ant who opted to stay behind and assist Paddy.
When Louis sees Liam his heart drops, and he thinks he might be sick. Very sick. He needs a bucket.
Liam looks small and broken in the hospital bed, attached to a variety of machines, needles sticking in his arms and tubes up his nose. The white hospital gown is a sickening reminder that underneath he is no longer the same Liam, and they shaved off a little piece of his hair in the surgery to get to the wound. Liam is usually, strong and warm and brave and at the moment he looks like he might not ever wake up. Louis can’t handle it.
He backs himself against the wall as Harry and Zayn move closer.
“What’s all this? I thought you said you were just worried about brain injury?” Zayn asks angrily motioning to all of Liam which is covered in casts and bandages.
“He has a few punctured ribs, fractured wrist, broken ankle, minor cuts and burns all over his body as well. But they are minor in comparison to the rest of him. Those are superficial wounds that look the worst, but they will heal,” The doctor assures the boys and leaves them to it.
Louis gulps down what he thinks is vomit trying to escape him.
Harry brushes he’s fingers very gently over Liam’s forehead, moving some hair away and smiles, “He’s going to hate that he can’t run around, he’s going to want out of here as soon as possible.”
Zayn lets out a tiny little smile, “Might have to actually let us help him for once,”
Harry snorts, “Not bloody likely.”
Louis gives the tiniest smile, because they all know Liam. They know Liam will hate he’s been in an accident, hate they’ve all worried and cried over him. He’ll hate that someone will have to look after him, and that he’s caused everyone such fuss. He’s an idiot is really what he is.
“He’s going to wake up Lou, it’ll be okay.” Harry assures Louis when he realises he hasn’t moved from the wall.
Louis gives a curt nod, and Zayn comes over to take his hand, “It’s up to Liam now. And you know Liam, he’s not going to go down without a fight.”
Louis nods again and it’s a tiny bit more relaxed. Because yes, he does know Liam. But that still doesn’t make the fact he’s lying in a hospital bed unconscious any better.
“I’ll kill him once he wakes up for scaring everyone like this,” He laughs a little, tears welling up in his eyes.
-/-/-/-/-
Karen and Geoff come later that night, Ruth and Nicola along with her. Karen cries the entire time the doctor talks to her, calms down and bursts into tears again the moment she sees Liam and the boys. Harry holds her until she calms down again and offers her a tissue, which just makes her cry again.
Harry ends up plastered to Karen for most of the night. Ruth and Nicola stare at Liam in awe, and Louis hears Nicola whisper, “It’s just like when he was a kid, in hospital. But like, worse.”
He leaves the room to go get tea after that.
Liam’s dad manages to keep collected and stern, answering all the medical questions parents should know while Karen ruins Harrys $500 shirt, not that he would ever say anything. It’s not until he sees Liam when he quickly mutters something inane and leaves the room.
Zayn finds him later outside sitting on a bench in the visitor’s area when he’s gone out to have a smoke, and sits next to him. They sit in silence for a few minutes until Geoff lets out a shaky breathe.
“Didn’t think I’d ever see him like that again, you know. Hooked up to all the machines, like when he was a baby.”
Zayn winces, but doesn’t say anything. Because that’s what’s Zayn best at, listening.
“We thought we were gonna loose him, you know? Because he was so sick, but he pulled through. Always did. And then high school came, and one time they put him in hospital. Fractured his ribs and almost gave him a concussion. Drove down the moment Karen called me from work and found him lying in a hospital bed, split lip and black eye. Tried to convince me he ran into a door. I’m not even sure why he bothered. But, he pulled through. He always did,” Geoff says.
Zayn doesn’t know what to say, doesn’t know if Geoff wants him to say anything at all. Stories about Liam’s childhood always make him vivid beyond belief. The fact someone would hurt him like that.
Instead, Zayn just offers him his packet of cigarettes. Geoff lets out a strained laugh, shakes his head and continues staring at nothing. They sit like that for a while.
-/-/-/-/-/-
Niall doesn’t arrive until 11:30pm that night and Louis is still surprised the hospital is letting people in at this time, and allowing Liam to have this many visitors. Louis imagines Paul has pulled some strings and he thinks he saw Harry signing some stuff for one of the nurses, so there’s probably some perks to being famous.
Louis’s been sat out on a plastic chair in Liam’s room, Karen curled up on the couch in a restless sleep with Nicola sitting above her. Ruth had to go home to deal with some work things but will be back as soon as possible, and Geoff’s been going in and out of the room for the last few hours as he can’t seem to sit still. Zayn pissed off a while ago but Louis knows he’s not far wandering around the hospital, waiting for Liam to wake up and Harry’s been calling everyone to keep them updated.
Louis has been utterly useless this whole time, just sitting by Liam’s beside afraid if he moves he might throw up. Its’ just, Liam looks so small and vulnerable and not okay, that Louis can’t take it. It’s his sweet, wonderful Liam and he needs to wake up. Assure everyone he’s okay.
He hears Niall before he sees him, bounding down the corridor, Supra’s making noise on the floor and loud Irish accent asking for Liam Payne. Harry shushes him and brings him into the room, and Louis hears his duffle bag hit the floor.
“Liam,” Niall whispers, quickly getting closer to the bed examining every inch of his band mate, “oh my god.”
“Niall,” Louis says helpless and Niall snaps up at him, tears falling down his cheeks,
“Harry said he was going to be okay. He said the doctor was positive. This doesn’t look bloody okay Lou!” Niall spits venomously with tears in his eyes and Louis shrinks down in the chair.
Niall doesn’t get angry very often but he’s furious right now and Louis is not equip for this. Liam knows how to calm Niall down. Liam would grab Niall by the shoulders softy and grab his chin in one hand forcing him to look up. Then he’d mumble something incoherent and stupid, and just silly enough to get Niall to crack a smile, forgetting why he was mad in the first place. Then he’d pull the younger boy in tightly, almost crushing him with his big muscles but Niall wouldn’t mind. Niall never does, Liam’s hugs are his favourite because the older boy is strong and warm and he feels protected in his arms. Like nothing can ever hurt him.
Niall blinks back angry tears as he realises Liam can’t hold him right now, and Liam may never hold him again. Liam can’t tell him it’ll be okay, because it isn’t. Liam has never lied to him once, never given him a reason not to believe Liam can’t fix it. Liam can fix anything.
But he can’t fix this, not now.
Niall just has to watch a machine help Liam breath, wondering how he can possibly do this, everything without him.
Luckily Zayn appears from nowhere and pulls Niall into his arms, wrapping them tightly around the boy. Niall easily melts into him, it’s not Liam. But it’ll do for now.
“How,” Niall whispers, sobs escaping him. Niall’s not going to pretend like this is okay, like he’s not hurting. This is Liam in that bed right now and Niall needs him to be okay.
They all need him to be okay.
“Shh, it’s okay. It looks worse than it is, mainly superficial wounds. He’ll wake up soon, and he’ll be fine, tell us all how silly we are for being so upset,” Zayn says soothingly, rubbing small circles on his back.
Karen wakes up slowly, frowning sadly at Niall but doesn’t interrupt the exchange.
“But Liam, he looks broken,” Niall chokes.
Louis cringes at the word, looking on weakly. Because that’s the thing, he does look broken and Louis can’t fix it. Nothing Louis can say will fix this.
Zayn just hums sadly and looks over his shoulder at Louis, who gives a helpless shrug, “He’ll be okay Ni, its Liam.”
Zayn keeps saying that, but Louis not sure if he believes him.
-/-/-/-/-
Liam still hasn’t woken up at 1pm the next day and Louis is getting rowdy, but not the good kind. Not that he wasn’t anxious before, but he certainly is now and he’s having trouble disguising it. Louis not sure he was good at disguising it before though either.
The doctors are still positive because there’s plenty of time for Liam to wake up but Louis would rather it be sooner than later.
Karen has gone back to Liam’s place with Geoff, something about fixing it up or getting some sleep. Louis not sure, he’s also not sure why she would fix his place up. It’s not like Liam will go back there once he wakes up. He’ll come home with Louis, or Harry or Zayn. Heck maybe even Paul will drag his ass over to his place so his wife can fuss over him. Paul has been coming in and out, dealing with management and press release and fans, all while being concerned for Liam like a lost father. Louis will buy Paul anything he wants when this is over because there’s no way he can deal with anything right now and Pauls making sure he doesn’t have to. He thinks he saw something about it in The Mirror but he quickly closed his phone, not wanting to deal with inane headlines about Liam Payne, boy band member in critical condition. Unfortunately fans and press are the last things he’s going to deal with right now.
Or maybe they’ll all camp out at Liam’s place, Karen seems like she wants to take him back to Wolverhampton with her but he can’t see Liam agreeing to that easily. He’ll have to go back to work eventually and he can do more here from London, plus he won’t want to be miles away from everyone if work is being done even if he should. He’ll want to try and help, contribute someway and Louis is happy to have him tucked up in a bed in London and play along with Liam’s delusional fantasies that he’s working if it means he’ll actually stay in bed and recover. Louis doesn’t ever want to let Liam out of his sights again if he’s being honest. Karen has to realise she’s got five sons now not one, and they’re all packing their bags and coming to Wolverhampton with her if she takes Liam away from them.
Louis is still sat in his chair by Liam’s bed, his ass is sore as hell and he hasn’t slept all night, but he doesn’t care and he’s not moving. No matter what everyone keeps telling him he’s not leaving until Liam wakes up.
“Gonna go get a coffee,” Zayn mumbles, “find the others. You’ll be alright?” he asks.
Louis just nods and Zayn leaves. He needs a break anyway. Zayn’s gone through more cigarettes in the last 12 hours then he has all year, Liam’s going to be mad when he wakes up.
In his absence, Louis scots his chair closer to Liam’s bed, and gently grabs the boys hand in his own, twirling their fingers together.
“Hey Li,” Louis said softly, the doctor said they should all be talking to him. Karen told him about the mischief Loki’s being getting up to at home and Niall tried to read him the sports section of the newspaper with animated voices and a false sense of attention to whatever the golf world is up to. Liam doesn’t even play golf, but Niall looks about 3.5 seconds away from tears at all times so Louis wasn’t going to mention it.
“You’ve given everyone a right scare babe, gotta wake up soon,” He laughs humourless.
“It’s just – I can’t stand to watch you like this Li. You’re the strong one you know? You’re the brave one, the one that looks after everyone when things go badly. But now, god Liam you should have seen Niall’s face when he saw you. Gonna have nightmares about that one. Nobody can bare to see you like this. You’re not supposed to get hurt.
“I think we make a deal after this okay, when you wake up. You’re not allowed to get hurt anymore? No more injuries, ever. I can’t take it, you’ve scared the hell out of me. I can’t function. I can’t even drink tea Liam. How do you feel? You’ve ruined my favourite thing in the world. So yea, no more getting hurt, not as much as a paper cut. We’ll wrap you in bubble wrap from now on. That could be fun, we could roll down hills covered in bubble wrap,”
Louis stops himself because that could be dangerous and he doesn’t want Liam to get hurt again,
“Okay, look maybe not the hill thing. But mate you have to wake up and do that stupid crinkly smile you do and laugh and tell everyone to stop worrying. We need you to tell us you’re okay because we are all falling apart at the seams here and you need to be okay. We can’t do this without you, alright? We’d never want to do this without you, anything. Okay, so just wake up for me bub,” Louis sighs, rubbing the back of the boys hand with his thumb.
He stares intently at Liam, so small in the hospital bed. So broken. He’s Liam, all broken and bruised.
He thinks he might be sick again.
Luckily, at that moment, Zayn, Niall and Harry walk in. Harry hands him a cup of tea and sits next to him, Zayn and Niall take the other side of the bed. Niall looks considerably better now that he’s talked to a doctor and taken in Liam’s appearance a bit more. He still looks fragile and scared, much like they all did when they first started in 2011. But at least he’s not yelling and crying anymore.
This was supposed to be a break before the tour, a time to recharge their batteries and relax. Liam was supposed to be coming over to his tomorrow to eat shitty take out and write new songs. It wasn’t supposed to end up like this.
“Any change?” Harry asks, breaking the silence.
Louis sighs, one hand occupied with tea while the other still clutches Liam, “nope.”
“He’ll be okay though. The doc said it’s up to Liam now when he wakes up, Liam will wake up.” Niall says confidently.
Niall has a blind confidence in Liam’s ability that is wavering for Louis. Liam’s given them no reason up until today to not believe he’s going to be okay. But Louis is flattering.
“Liam’s too stubborn not to wake up,” Harry agrees.
Louis smiles a bit, because he’s right. Liam is stubborn.
“Karen was saying she wants him to go back to Wolverhampton with her and Geoff for his recovery. Says she’d stay up here with him but getting the time off work will be hard,” Zayn explains.
“He can stay with me. Us. We’re not going to leave him like this,” Louis says instantly and he’s met with a knowing smirk from Zayn.
“I know, that’s what I told her. Said we’d make a room from him in one of our houses, or camp out at his until he’s better. She’s not convinced, but it’s the better option and she knows it,” Zayn says.
“We could get Ruth to bring Loki down, he’d like that.” Harry says.
Zayn hums, sipping on his tea.
“He’s going to hate it,” Louis says after a moment.
“What?” Harry asks.
“This, everything. He’s going to hate knowing how much we all worried, how upset he made everyone. He’s especially going to hate the idea of us all packing into his house looking after him because he can’t,” Louis laughs.
Niall scoffs, “He’ll just have to bloody suck it up wont he. Be bloody lucky if I ever let him out of my sight again. 3 days I’m gone for and he does this, can’t leave him alone for a second.”
Louis smiles, because while it’s a joke. It’s also really not. Liam has scared all of them so much, because they’ve almost lost a brother. Their big brother, their little brother, and they can’t do that again. Louis won’t be surprised if Niall never does leave his sight again or is Harry follows him around like a lost puppy. They’re all so lost without him.
“He’ll wake up, and then we can tell him to his face how stupid he is,” Zayn says and Louis smirks. Because he knows Zayn would never in a million years say stupid and Liam in the same sentence, knows how upset it would make Liam. Zayn’s bitched out people for giving Liam weird looks when he says something not quite so intelligent before.
“He will,” Louis repeats.
-/-/-/-/-
It’s exactly 46 hours after the accident that Liam wakes up, 2 hours before the estimated time frame of waking up by the doctor and the official it’s time to start freaking out time zone. Louis would murder the stupid boy for cutting it so close if he didn’t look so fragile in the bed.
Louis had been sitting there by the bed, staring into space when something shuffles next to him.
“Lou?” A very small and confused voice asked and Louis almost topples out of his chair when he realises its Liam.
“Oh my god,” Louis says and he thinks he might be sick.
“Liam?” Zayn asks who’s on his other side and Liam gives him a small frown.
“Where am I?” He asks, his voice is hoarse and rough but he’s eyes are open and he’s alive. Louis is going to be sick.
“I’ll get a doctor,” Niall says and suddenly their all being ushered out of the room so Liam can be checked on by a doctor.
They all wait impatiently in the waiting room for 30 minutes before they hear anything again, and this time it’s the doctor saying that while Liam is still in critical condition and will be quite some time before he is fully healed, there have been no permeant damages and after some physical therapy Liam will make a full recovery.
Again, Louis could be sick. But in a good way, kind of.
“Family only at the moment,” The doctor says as he ushers Karen and Geoff into Liam’s room. Louis heart drops for a minute because it’s hard to remember that they’re not actually family. No matter what happens, or what they’ve all been through together, they are not Liam’s family and they don’t have the same rights as his Mom and Dad.
It’s like a punch in the gut and Louis collapses on chair a burring his face in his hands because they could take Liam away from them. Karen could decide Wolverhampton is a far better place for recovery and Liam needs to be around family right now and Liam could think maybe it’s better if he rests to, and suddenly Louis is left without a best friend as he ships him away to Wolverhampton to get better.
What if Geoff thinks he’ll be safe with them because they can look after and protect him, the one thing Louis couldn’t do. Because Louis let this happen.
When Louis found out about Liam’s past history with friends he made a promise to himself he would never let Liam get hurt like that again. He’s Liam, would never have to go through that kind of pain again. He feels like an absolute failure for letting him down.
But Louis’s almost lost him once, he can’t lose him again.
The other boys seem to have a similar sudden realisation as they all take a seat, Harry rests a hand on his shoulder and Niall chews on his thumb nervously.
“He’s going to be okay,” Niall says, voice wavering but trying to find conviction.
Zayn just nods and pulls him in for a quick hug.
They wait another 47 minutes before Geoff and Karen come out, Geoff gives them a tired smile and goes to call the girls while Karen turns to the boys.
“He’s not supposed to have any more visitors, he needs his sleep. He’s very weak at the moment, but the doctor said he’ll start getting stronger now,” She smiles, a genuine smile unlike the fake hopeful ones she’s had for days, “He kept asking about you though, so you’ve got 10 minutes to assure him you’re all fine. He doesn’t believe me, wants to make sure he’s boys are okay himself.”
She smiles softly at them, like they are all something she can’t quite understand and they all nod weakly.
“Be gentle, no loud noises or rough cuddles,” She jokes weakly, “And, just… try not to cry? He’s still upset, worried. Try to look like you haven’t all been up for 2 days worrying sick about him.”
That gets a strangled laugh from them but they comply, slowly entering his hospital room again.
Louis however, lacks behind staring straight at the door ridged with fear and anxiety and all kinds of worry.
He’s snapped out of it when Karen puts a hand on his shoulder, and gently wipes away tears he didn’t realise were falling down his cheeks with a tissue, “He’s okay Louis. He’s going to be fine,” She assures.
Louis nods and bites his lip nervously, turning to her, “You can’t take him away.” He says firmly, “I know you’re his mom and you know best and you just want him to get better but, you can’t take him away. He’ll want to be here in London where he feels useful and, we can’t lose him again.”
It’s a pathetic plea really, Louis knows that. It’s pathetic and sad and probably all kinds of morally and politically incorrect, but he had to put it out there.
Karen just tuts nonsenses, “He wants to see you Lou, we can talk later.”
Louis sighs, he feels like he’s already lost. But maybe he should pick his battles.
He walks into the room slowly, like a frightened cat or deer, it’s exactly the same as it has been for the past 48 hours, except now the boy lying in the bed has his eyes open and a small, tired smile on his face.
Liam’s eyes light up when he sees him enter, “Lou,” he rasps out quietly and Louis has to remember his not allowed to cry.
“Hey mate,” Louis tries not to sound strained, he stands next to Zayn who puts a hand around his waist for support, opposite Harry and Niall who are occupying Liam’s other side, grasping his hand tightly, “have a nice nap?” He jokes.
The corners of Liam’s month pull up slightly tired, but then he pouts, “Thought you weren’t here,”
Louis is stunned for a minute and turns to Zayn.
“We told you he was just outside talking to your mom, Louis hasn’t left your side the whole time babe,” Zayn answers when Louis is at a lost.
Liam continues to pout, and slowly lifts the hand not connected to Harrys up to Louis to grab. Louis takes it easily rubbing his thumb on the back of his hand, “You okay?” Liam asks seriously.
Because of course Liam who has just been in a car accident, unconscious for over 40 hours would ask him that. The first thought Liam had when the other boys entered his room and not Louis was that he wasn’t okay, and Liam needs to comfort him.
“Oh god, I’m fine. Was just having a nice chat with your mom. You know me,” He lets out a strangled laugh, “It’s you we’ve all been a bit worried about mate.”
Liam still frowns, seemingly unconvinced by Louis’s blatant lie but says anyway, “I’m fine. Want to go home now, sleep in my own bed.”
“You’ve been awake less than an hour,” Harry says, “You don’t get to complain about the hospital yet. You haven’t even tried the food.”
“Hey, the jello cups are alright,” Niall defends weakly, trying to break tension.
Its tense and its strained, but it’s far from awkward. He may be weak, and fragile and a little bit broken, but at least he’s awake. They can deal with whatever they need to from here.
-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/
*BUZZ* *BUZZ*
Louis is woken abruptly by his phone buzzing on the coffee table and gracefully falls off the couch in a heap as he tries to get to it quickly,
“Hello?” He asks sleepily.
He doesn’t remember falling asleep, all he remembers is Geoff driving him and Zayn to their respective homes at 2am in the morning after Liam had woken up and Harry and Niall had already decided after seeing Liam alive they’d finally get some sleep.
When he’d been dropped off he’d gone straight for his couch and automatically turned on the Avengers, because it was the last movie he watched with Liam. And he’s man enough to admit he’s feeling a bit vulnerable right now. He must have fallen asleep at the start of it on the couch though, because now his neck’s sore from the weird angle and the menu is playing on a loop.
“Hey Lou, I’m going back to the hospital this morning do you want a lift?” Harry on the other end asks, far more awake then he’s feeling right now. Clearly Harry had actually gotten some decent rest unlike him.
“What time is it?” He asks.
“Almost 11?” Harry asks, “Are you okay Lou? Zayn said Geoff drove you guys home to make sure you rested, so I figured you might need a lift.”
Louis shook his head from side to side to properly wake himself up, “Right, right yea. Was just a bit out of it. Can you give me like 30 minutes? I haven’t showered yet.”
“Lou,” Harry wasn’t an idiot and could clearly hear through Louis’s false bravo, “You need to look after yourself or you’ll get sick. Liam’s going to be okay.”
“I know, I know Harry,” Louis dismissed quickly, “I’m fine I promise. Just need to shower,”
He heard Harry give a long suffering sigh, “I’ll be over in 50 minutes and I’ll bring food. Shower and make yourself look less like a zombie.”
With that he hung up and Louis swore. Even though it had been a restless, couch sleep at least he’d gotten some sleep last night. Except now he’s probably fucked up his neck sleeping on it because it was particularly painful to move.
Quickly he jumped in the shower, shaved and changed into some clean jeans and sweater. He can’t remember the last time he showered or ate a proper meal, so at least he felt a little more human now.
Harry arrived exactly 45 minutes after their conversation, complete with a blueberry muffin and salad sandwich that he made Louis eat in the car on the way to the hospital. Sometimes Harry was annoying with his constant need to eat healthy and take care of himself and sometimes Louis was grateful for it.
When they arrived back at the hospital Louis was feeling much more calm and collected then before, they meet Ruth and Karen in the hallway who were going on about how much better he looks today and how much happier he is. They were going to the café to get some tea.
They entered Liam’s hospital room and found him sitting up, chatting away with Niall who was sitting crossed legged at the end of his bed and Zayn was perched on a chair to his left, the chair as physically close to Liam as possible.
He smiled his crinkly eyed Liam smile when they entered and Louis has never in his whole like been so happy to see Liam breathing on his own.
“Liam!” Harry exclaims happily pondering over to the boy and pulling him in for a gentle hug and kiss on the forehead.
“Hey Haz, you look much better today. Get some sleep?” Liam asks seriously, as Harry pulls up a seat close to Liam.
Harry rolls his eyes but smiles nonetheless, “You look much better too Liam, less like the living dead.”
Liam laughs at that and Louis watches how he winces slightly, his broken rib clearly taking a tool. Louis takes in all of Liam, and while he’s happy and smiling and clearly at least 100 times better than the last few days, he can’t help but really notice him. Notice him wince slightly at the laugh, how his eyes have dark bags under them, a patch of his hair was shaven off for surgery, how he shuffles on the bed awkwardly because his right leg is in a cast, how he waves around his left wrist in a brace because its fractured and all the minor cuts and bruises left on his face and arms and probably all the places Louis can’t see.
He’s Liam and he’s much better, but he’s still hurt. He’s still got physically wounds that need to heal. He’s not better yet, and Louis still can’t fix him. Just watch him walk around in pain.
Liam turns to him next and he’s broken out of his trance by Liam pouting, “You don’t look better,”
If he wasn’t so surprised he’d be offended “Excuse me?” Louis asks.
“You look like you haven’t sleep properly in days, you were supposed to go home and rest. I’m fine Lou, just a few bumps and bruises” He pouts like his talking to a stubborn child who refuses to go to bed on time.
Louis is offended honestly because he’s supposed to worrying about Liam, not the other way around. Liam just woke up from a bloody coma for Christ sake, who does he think he is lecturing Louis when he almost died?
“I did rest, I’m fine god Liam. You’re in a hospital bed stop worrying about me,” Louis snaps and it’s not until he sees the back of Niall’s head visibly flinch that he realises he was probably too harsh.
Harry is giving him a disapproving look and Zayn’s giving him a calculating one and honestly Louis hasn’t slept enough for this, he rubs a hand over his face, “Look, sorry I didn’t mean-“
He’s cut off by Liam waving an arm at him frantically though smiling despite Louis just yelling at him, “Stop, don’t apologize Lou I get it,” He’s giving him a small inviting smile still waving his arm around and Louis knows he wants him to come closer but he’d really like to run in the opposite direction if he’s honest.
“No I’m sorry, look I’ll just get some tea, or muffins or something,” Louis stutters out, suddenly feeling not only like someone’s who just kicked a puppy but also quite upset and he’s not sure why.
He takes a step back and looks towards the door but is stopped by Liam’s demanding, “No! You can’t go you’ve just gotten here. Come on Lou don’t be silly,”
He’s still got his hand in the air waiting for Louis to take it and now he’s even more conflicted then before, he takes a deep breath in, “Li its fine, I was just worried,”
Louis not even sure what he’s trying to explain anymore. All he knows is he’s tired and he is not emotionally equip for this.
“Louis Tomlinson if you don’t get your butt over here right now, I’ll just come over there and make you, I’ll chase you around the hospital if I have to. And you and I both know I’m not allowed to move yet so don’t get either of us in trouble,” Liam says evenly.
Louis never should have corrupted Liam, it wasn’t worth the hassle it will get him into in the future.
Louis takes a deep breath, and tries to construct his face into the smoothest features he can manage, “Alright, alright don’t get your panties in a twist. There’s a bit of the Tommo to go round, just wanted to see if your sister needed any help,”
It was even and predictably Louis, but he can tell nobody in the room was buying it or going to ignore the minor freak out he just had. Either way they all pretend like it didn’t happen when Louis moves over to the bed, metaphorical tail between his legs and Liam grabbs his hand roughly, signalling for him to lay down.
Louis frowns and looks up at Zayn cautiously whose giving him a knowing smirk, Zayn sucked.
Nonetheless, carefully Louis laid down next to Liam on the bed trying to be as gentle with him as possible. Once settled however Liam was happy to hold the boy tightly to him, arms wrapped around his middle while Louis laid his head on the boys chest listening to his heart beating. It was comforting to hear his breathing and chest moving as he chuckled, it completely set his mind at ease knowing he was okay. He could breathe easier knowing Liam could.
The boys went back to their conversation, Zayn starting one up with Niall about the new football season that had just started. Louis was grateful for the distraction.
“You okay?” Liam asks quietly, just for Louis to hear, “I’m not going to break.”
Louis didn’t doubt the other boys could still hear, but it was nice they were pretending to give them privacy.
“Of course, don’t be silly Liam. Know you’re not going to break,” Louis muttered embarrassed as he fiddled with the thin blanket draped over Liam’s legs.
Liam chuckled a little and kissed the top of Louis head, “Good, just thought I’d remind you. I’m not going anywhere.”
Louis smiled and moved his hand up to tweak Liam’s nipple to get him to stop talking. It didn’t get far before Liam, even still weak after the incident, grabbed his hand to stop its impending doom and entwined their fingers together.
Louis hasn’t intentionally tweaked Liam’s nipple to get him to hold his hand since the Xfactor days, but this was nice.
Louis stayed curled up to Liams side for the rest of the day, including when the doctors and nurses came in to check on him - No Louis is fine you can still take my blood pressure – and when Nicola cooed at how adorable they were – shut up Nicola we’re men.
-/-/-/-/-/-/-
Louis didn’t realise that he must have fallen asleep at some time during the day, he literally hasn’t moved from Liam for hours and while Liam wasn’t protesting, neither was Louis.
Blinking sleepily he looks around the room, to find it deserted beside Zayn sitting in the chair reading a comic book. He had a large pile next to him, meaning he must have gone home and brought some for Liam to read while bed ridden.
Louis sits up slowly and carefully not to wake Liam who was also fast asleep, “Did you bring your entire comic collection?” Louis teases and Zayn snaps up startled.
Quickly he composes himself and his cheeks tint pink slightly, “I couldn’t decide which ones Liam would like best,” He mutters and Louis smiles.
“How long was I asleep?” He asks sheepishly.
“A couple hours I think, it’s almost 6,” Zayn admits and sets the comic down next to him.
Louis cringes, “Someone should have woken me, got the dead weight off Liam,” He jokes.
Zayn just shrugs, “When you fell asleep Paul offered to move you without waking you, but Liam wouldn’t have it. Said you needed a proper sleep. Pissed off some doctors too. He fell asleep not long after though, so as long as he was resting no one was complaining.”
Louis blushes at that and looks down at Liam’s sleeping form. He looks much more peaceful now, a sleep they know he’ll wake up from rather than before.
“I’m sorry,” Louis mumbles to Zayn, he’s not sure entirely sure what he’s apologizing for but he knows he needs to say it.
Zayn just waves him off, “It’s okay Lou. We’re all dealing differently, you just scared Liam a bit I think and he wanted to make it okay. He knows you were just upset. He did the same thing to Niall when we got here this morning. We couldn’t get Niall to calm down, I think he was having a panic attack once he saw him. But Liam pulled him in and Niall said it was the heartbeat that got him to calm down, I guess he thought it would work with you too.”
Louis mules over this, Liam literally always knows how to make it better, “He shouldn’t be looking after us though, he’s the one that’s hurt,” Louis frowns.
Zayn shrugs, “we can all look after each other yea?”
Louis smiles a bit, “I guess.”
Zayn hands him a comic book, “It’s gonna be okay, now we just have to deal with Liam in a cast. That’ll be fun.”
Louis rolls his eyes, yes that will be fun.
-/-/-/-/-/-/-
Now that Liam’s officially awake, and going to make a full recovery it’s the road between broken and healed that they now have to cross. Louis never thought that would be easy, but he also didn’t think they’d cross this many barriers.
It first happens 2 days after Liam wakes up, he’s mainly just been napping and reading comic books with the boys, having visitors come and go while Zayn and Liam try to explain the different comic book universes to Nicola who is trying to sound as interested as possible in her baby brothers weird obsession despite being clueless,
“No wait, Spiderman wasn’t part of the avengers in the movie why is he in this?,”
“No he’s recruited in the UN Charter Recruits,”
“Okay, but what about Magneto wasn’t he in X-men why is he in this one?”
“No okay, look...”
The doctors just seen Liam to explain he’ll have to be in hospital for a few more days to run a few more tests and make sure everything’s okay, and then they want to set him up with a physical therapist. Karen sat by Liams bed side, moving a few hairs away from his face when she suggested to the doctor and Liam, during his recovery Liam come back to Wolverhampton for a bit so they can look after him properly, get the care he needs.
Liam froze and frowned, glancing at his dad and then to Louis and Zayn who had been the only other ones present during the doctor’s visit.
The doctor smiled, “That’s a good idea, you’ll need it for a while.”
“What?” He asks confused.
“Just for a couple weeks sweetie, it’s going to be a bit tough on your own. If you come home they’re always be someone there to help out,” She explains rationally and Louis can feel his head go dizzy. He grabs on to Zayn’s upper arm for support, but Zayn looks just as worried.
“I can’t go back to Wolverhampton,” Liam says slowly, “I need to be here in London, we start recording a new album in a few weeks.”
Louis lets out a breath he didn’t even know he was holding in, he hadn’t even thought about the album. That will have to be delayed.
The doctor frowns, “You won’t be able to start working for at least a month, you’ve been in a serious accident Mr Payne you’re still recovering. Work is not an option at the moment.”
The colour from Liam’s face visibly drains and Zayn moves closer to him, grasping his hand tightly, “Babe, it’ll be okay.” He whispers.
Liam scowls, “No. No that’s not okay, I have to get back to work. We have a tour coming up soon, no you don’t understand I don’t have a normal job,”
The doctor frowns, “I understand your job Mr Payne, but this isn’t really up for debate. Your health is my only concern and I agree, going back to Wolverhampton for continual support is a good idea,”
Liam looks frantically up at the boys and Louis easily shushes him despite his stomach tightening, “No its fine Liam, we can delay the album and tour for as long as it takes that’s not an issue. We just want you to get better, we need you to get better.” Louis assures him.
Liam still looks like he’s about to cry and is visibly distraught, so Louis turns to the doctor, “What if he could get the support he needs here? We can look after, my mom was a nurse we’re not idiots. Someone would always be with him at his house and we could even get a nurse in. No offence to Karen or Geoff because they’re his parents and I will not argue with what they have to say, but uprooting him to a different state seems excessive and unnecessary when he could get all the help and more he needs here. Besides the best doctors and physio therapists would be in London, and then we could get one to come to his house when needed.”
Louis has his management voice on, the one he talks to Simon with and Modest people when he wants something, Louis can handle people when he needs to.
“Then he can still be in London and we could bring the recordings to him when he’s ready, the tour will have to be delayed of course but if he’s here he can work from home and not be isolated from what’s going on. We understand completely that Liam’s physical health is the main priority but what about everything else? If we could theoretically offer everything he needs in Wolverhampton there would be no need to uproot him, right?”
The doctor frowns, not fully convinced but not opposed to it either, “In theory yes. But he also needs a lot of family support right now.”
“We are his family,” Zayn buts in determinedly, and then looks sheepishly at Karen and Geoff like he’s offended them, “It’s just, we are his family. Wolverhampton’s only like 2 hours away anyway, it seems silly to bring him down when he could just stay here. You guys have jobs and things you need to do, you can just come and stay with us whenever you need to. He’d be looked after.” Zayn assures.
The doctors still frowning, not liking being interrupted by Zayn and Louis but sighs, “In theory yes. But ultimately the decision is Mr Paynes, I can only advise him. Just take it easy for the next few days at least, don’t get yourself worked up.”
The doctor exits and theirs an eerie tension set over the room, Louis feels like they’re playing tug of war with Liam with his parents and he feels awful. If it was his Mom he’d know how upset she’d be, but ultimately she has 4 other children to look after, so the decision would easily be taken out of her control. Liam’s the baby in his family, so it’s a bit harder.
Louis has come too far with Liam not to put up a fight though.
“Li –“ Karen starts but Liam stops her by taking her hand,
“Boys why don’t you give me a second with mom and dad?” He asks kindly and Louis nods quickly, happy to leave.
He shares a guilty look with Zayn before taking a seat in the waiting room.
-/-/-/-/-
Louis not sure how later it is when Karen takes a seat next to him, not paying attention but texting his mom an update on Liam’s condition.
“He’s going to stay in London,” She says snapping him out of his trance.
“Oh,” Is all he says.
“It makes more sense really, he’s an adult now. He can look after himself, he’s been doing it for a while. He’s just my baby, so somethings I don’t see things clearly,” She explains.
“Oh Karen, no. I’m sorry we weren’t-“
“It’s okay Lou, I understand. Honestly, it makes far more sense for him to stay here. There are better doctors in London and the physio they’ll have working with him is one of the best in the country. I just wanted to be with him is all, but I know you’ll look after him. I never ever wanted you to think I don’t trust you to look after him, he thinks the world of you boys,” She says, resting a hand on his knee.
Louis chokes up a little, “Thanks. I just, I’m sorry.”
“Sorry for what hun?” She asks.
Louis shrugs, staring at his lap, “For this. For not looking after him properly enough, he shouldn’t have gotten so hurt.”
“Oh honey,” She’s pulling him in for a hug now and he lets her, trying to hold back tears so he doesn’t ruin her blouse, “You have done a wonderful job at looking after him. All the boys, these things happen and there nobody’s fault okay? The only thing that matters is that he’s okay.”
Louis nods, even if he doesn’t truly believe it.
“You boys are the best thing that’s ever happened to Liam and I’m so glad he has all of you. There’s nobody else in the world I would trust looking after him after something like this, but I trust you,” She says, squeezing his shoulder lightly and wiping away his tears.
“Thanks Karen,” He says quietly.
She smiles genuinely at him, “It’s okay love. We talked about getting him settled in Harry’s house? Liam’s flat is a bit small, so he said he’d ask him but it seems to make the most sense because it’s the biggest and me and the girls can come down on weekends and have our own space,” She said.
“Of course,” Louis says instantly, “Harry has like 50 guest rooms and nobody even knows why, it’s a bit out of London too so it’ll be private. You’re welcome to stay there as long as you like,”
Louis is just offering up his band mates house now to whoever but it never really made sense to Louis why Harry bought a house so big in the first place. A part of Louis assumed it was because Harry thought they’d all just crash their mostly and he’d have so many parties and guests that the place would always be vibrant and full of creative people to occupy their time, welcoming much like Harry himself.
Unfortunately fate had them rarely in London together at the same time, and when they were they stayed in their own homes. Leaving Harrys giant house empty and practically unused, Harry even doesn’t stay their very often, clearly feeling quiet lonely in his own home.
Karen smiles, “Good. We trust you.” And with one last kiss on the head leaves to find Geoff.
-/-/-/-/-/-
“Can I go home now?” Liam asks the next day, pulling his best pouting face at his band member, lip out and all. Niall just rolls his eyes and shoves his hand in Liam’s face.
“Stop that or you’ll face will get stuck and you’re gonna look like a gimp on our next album cover,” Niall laughs, sitting next to him on the bed and Liam has to budge over to make room.
“But I’m bored,” Liam sighs, resting his head on Nialls shoulder. He’s been in hospital awake for three days now and its killing him, he wants to be up and about and anywhere but here. He knows it’s not practical, he’s still in quite a bit of pain when he’s not high on pain killers and he’s ankles busted either way, but he’s having a hard time staying still.
“Zayn bought the Avengers monopoly, we could play that?” Niall offers.
Liam sighs regretfully, “Maybe later.”
They both know they won’t play later though, because the nurse will come in soon and give him pain medication that will make him sleepy. But it’s okay, Niall doesn’t mind.
It’s just Niall and Liam at the moment, and Niall’s enjoying having Liam to himself for a little while. It’s nice to have his bandmate back, and breathing.
Niall changes the channel on Liam’s hospital TV and they watch reruns of Hey Arnold in a comfortable silence for a little while, until Liam’s starts fidgeting clearly in some kind of pain. It’s not unusual, sometimes his ribs play up a bit before he needs medication to sooth them again, he was literally hit by another car, it’s not really that surprising. But Niall doesn’t like to watch him in pain, trying to battle it out on his own and stay quiet. He wonders how it’s going to be when Liam doesn’t have the crutch of pain killers entering his system every few hours by a drip when he goes back home.
“Does it hurt much?” Niall asks quietly, glancing over at Liam.
Liam smiles easily, “Nah, only a bit.”
“You were hit by a car Li, it’s going to hurt,” Niall rolls his eyes.
Liam just laughs, “It’s a bit uncomfortable sometimes, when I move the wrong way or something. But it’s expected, I was hit by a car,” He teases.
Niall smiles and hold Liam’s hand gently. He’d usually cuddle up the boy when watching TV but he’s a bit worried he might hurt him further, hand holding is the safer option.
“I don’t remember it you know?” Liam says quietly after a moment of silence, Niall just hums in acknowledgement allowing Liam to continue if he wants. He hasn’t talked about the accident since it happened, nobody’s asked either.
“I remember getting in the car with Paddy going to get take out, and then just nothing. The next memory I have is waking up and the doctor telling me I’ve been asleep for two days, its weird innit?” He asks, more conversational then anything.
“Maybe it’s a good thing, you don’t remember it.” Niall says.
“Maybe,” Liam agrees, “It’s just a bit odd, about everything, everyone. Everyone being so worried and concerned, and I don’t remember why. I mean, besides the injuries I’m fine, and everyone is acting like I almost died.”
Nialls breathe hitches at that and Liam can feel him tense, “Niall I didn’t die, I never almost died I’ve talked to the doctor,” He assures, “You can’t get rid of me.”
Niall breathes deeply, grasping the hand more tightly, “I know. I know, it was just hard. Having you in the bed and not knowing when you’d wake up. I came in and you looked so broken, we all thought we’d lost you. It was hard, we’re all still, dealing with it. Sort of.”
Liam nods, like he understands when in reality he doesn’t. For him he doesn’t remember anything, emotionally he’s fine, their just broken bones that will heal. But for the boys, well he can’t imagine how he would have felt if it was any of the other boys in his position.
“I’m okay Ni, not going anywhere,” He assures, pulling Niall into his side gently.
Niall just mumbles something incoherent but Liam takes it as a win.
Its then when his hospital room swings open and Louis comes bounding in with Lux perked high on his shoulders, hairdresser trailing behind “Guess who wanted to say hi to Uncle Liam and draw all over his cast in pink sharpies her favourite Uncle bought her,”
Liam’s smile grows wide when he sees the little girl grinning at him, making grabby hands towards him as she’s gently lowered to his bed with Niall.
Lou and Lux stay for the remainder of the afternoon, and if Liam’s cast now has pink doodles all over it when Lux, Louis and even Zayn spent all afternoon drawing on it, well he’s not going to complain.
He will complain however when Louis grabbed the sharpie and tried to right ticklish all down his foot because he’d jumped out of his skin and accidently wacked Niall, but besides that he won’t complain.
-/-/-/-/-/-/-
Being in a car accident, one as serious as Liam’s is confusing for someone like Louis. Because there are a lot of minor details he feels like people forgot to mention or he just wasn’t paying attention to when they told him.
Because suddenly simple tasks have become very hard and straining for Liam, and while he acts and generally seems okay theirs so many things preventing him from actually being okay.
It’s not until a few days later when Liam is allowed out of bed and finally allowed to try his hand at walking again. Since the accident he hasn’t left the bed nor has he been eating solid foods, the toxins which build up to protect him causing all kinds of medical issues which made him weak and tired and unable to do tasks Louis takes for granted. So while he’ll claim to be fine, he is under no circumstances allowed to go home until he can walk or keep foods down. Now the doctor finally thinks he has healed somewhat to start trying.
None of the boys are allowed to be present when he’s got the physio in there, so they go down the McDonalds to get some food. An hour later they come back, to find Liam sitting in a comfy arm chair that has been moved to his room, wearing plaid pyjama bottoms and a big hoodie, his broken leg perched up on a stool where now all the sharpie is clearly visible. He looks tired, and fragile, they can see how much muscle his lost since the accident. It would look like he was about to pass out at any moment if he wasn’t wearing that ridiculous smile on his face, proud of his minor accomplishment from getting to the bed to the chair.
“Look what we have here, our own Usain Bolt,” Louis jokes as they enter the hospital room.
Liam smiles at them proudly, “Made it all the way from the bed. Only took me 45 minutes and I only threw up once,”
Harry winces at that and Geoff chuckles, “He has been down for so long that his body reacted a bit to the sudden change, but the doctor says its’ normal.”
“Well we’re very proud of you, next step climbing buildings and mount Everest and before you know it we’ve conquered the safari desert like it’s nothing,” Louis exclaims excited.
Zayn rolls his eyes and takes a seat by Karen and Ruth on the floor, joining in their game of Monopoly, “It’s the Sahara Desert idiot,”
“Eh, same difference,” Louis shrugs.
Liam smiles brightly up at him, the banter nothing to him, “Next step is keeping solid foods down, but then we can cross the Sahara Desert if you’d like.” He says seriously.
“If you’re going to cross deserts can you please wait until I’m dead?” His mom asks kindly, but tired.
Niall pulls out his phone, “Can I take a photo? Prove to the fans that you’re alive and okay? They’re getting a bit stir crazy,” Niall adds sheepishly, not trying to offend Liam, but honestly this is the most alive and happy they’ve seen Liam in days so it should be documented.
Liam smiles brightly because of course he does, “Yea sure, but you have to be in it. I’ll look stupid alone,” he says and Louis rolls his eyes.
Niall turns the camera on front and bends down near Liam, angling it for a selfie that Liam smiles happily for. Louis quickly jumps behind the chair and pulls a stupid face next to Liams head.
“There,” Niall says happily as he posts it to Instagram with the caption – Look who is up and about today looking and feeling much better! Champion! #getbettersoonLiam
And if Louis see’s Niall set the photo as his lock screen on his iPhone, he doesn’t mention it.
-/-/-/-/-/-
It’s still a few days before the doctor feels Liam is getting better enough to keep down solid foods, he’s been living off a drip and Louis can’t imagine it’s healthy to live off solely fluids. But he’s not the doctor and Liam has just smiled and shrugged when he mentioned it, claiming he wasn’t hungry, so Louis didn’t push it.
Niall thinks it’s a right outcry but Zayn flicked him on the ear after he complained about. It’s not like you’re not getting food, he mumbled annoyed and Niall just smiled sheepishly.
He’s been walking around a little the past few days, over to the chair then back to bed. Then maybe to the bathroom with the help of two nurses and occasionally one of the boys. Louis can tell he hates it, hates that he needs crutches to walk, hates that even with crutches he’s so weak, hates he needs at least three people standing by his door in case he collapses.
But he can also tell Liam’s determined to get better, and he understands that in order to get better has to make a few sacrifices. It’s not like they’re not seen each other in compromising positions before, what’s a few penises among friends really?
It’s later in the afternoon, when Louis and Zayn are coming back from a meeting with Simon about what they’re next move as a band is – and they all decided that was to keep low and focus on Liam’s health alone – when they run into Harry and Niall in the waiting room, Harry pacing anxiously.
“What’s up?” Louis asks.
Niall’s head snaps up and he looks guilty and worried, “Liam.” Is all he says.
Louis is confused, “what happened?”
“They tried him on some food, it didn’t sit well. He’s being sick now, we think. They kicked us out,” Harry said sadly.
Zayn frowned, “if he was just going to be sick why did they give it to him?” He asks angrily, shoving the plastic chair to the side in frustration. Louis puts a hand on the younger boys shoulder but he shrugs it off angrily.
“No just –“ Zayn says frustrated and tugs at his jacket impractically, “I’m going for a smoke,” He mumbles and quickly leaves to go outside. He feels useless, that Liam is still their hurting and he can’t do anything. He just wants to help, do something productive but he feels so stupid and helpless.
The three boys watch him walk away, “Should we follow him?” Harry asks.
Louis shakes his head, “he needs a minute I think, we’ll drag him back when Liam’s okay. We’ll get him to talk some sense into him.”
It’s not long before Nicola is coming over to them, she looks wrecked but not completely pessimistic, “Hey you can go in now, he’s okay. He just reacted a bit badly, but its fine the doctors gave him something for it. He’s just a bit tired and groggy, but it’ll be fine. Its normal,” She assures them when they all look sceptical.
“Are you sure? He looked really ill…” Niall starts,
“He’s okay, it’s not easy but he’s going to be okay, I’m sure,” She says and motions for them to move, “Go on in, where’s Zayn?” She asks.
“Gone for a smoke, I’ll go get him,” Louis says. Nicola shakes her head,
“Nah I’ll go find him, he probably needs a minute. I’ll send him in when I find him,” She smiles and goes to the garden area.
Slowly the enter Liam’s room, to find him laying down in his bed propped up a few extra pillows and blankets covering him. He looks worn out and tired, but his spirits seem high enough as he smiles at them, motioning for them to sit down. Karen looks grateful for the exchange as she says something about calling a few people and needing a minute.
“Hey Li, how you feeling?” Louis asks gently, taking Karen’s seat as the other boys sit down.
He gives them he’s best Liam smile, but its weak and Louis hope it’s because they’ve give him some kind of medication to make him sleepy,
“Better now,” he supplies.
Louis sighs affectionately, “What are we gonna do with you mate?”
Liam smiles, “Not give me solid foods I hope, I didn’t think I’d have that much to puke up to be honest,” he laughs.
Harry makes a face, “Maybe you leave out the puke details?”
“We have to listen to you whenever you have a healthy bowel movement after getting sick that one time, you can listen to Liam’s puke stories,” Niall shots back.
Harry rolls his eyes, “One time, honestly.”
Liam just smiles at them and looks around, “Where’s Zayn?”
Louis tries to act as nature as possible but clearly the quick glance he gives Harry and Niall is information enough to know somethings wrong. Luckily, it’s that moment Zayn decides to walk in, head hung low and hands stuffed in his leather jacket pockets, hunched into himself. He looks a bit guilty, for losing his temper in the hall, upset he let himself get so affected.
Also kind of afraid of what they said to Liam, because even though he’s been so sick Liam’s still amazing at reading them all and doesn’t want them to worry, Zayn’s not sure how he’s not supposed to worry when Liam’s in a hospital bed though.
“Hey Li, how you feeling?” Zayn asks, taking a seat next to Louis but keeping his distance.
Liam frowns, “Better, was just a bit of a scare,” He says slowly. When Zayn just nods, fiddling with the buttons on his jacket awkwardly Liam continues,
“I’m okay Zayn, seriously it was normal. Are you okay? Where were you?” He asks.
Zayn just shrugs noncommittally, “Yea I know,” Avoiding the question.
He spares at glance at Harry who is smirking at him, knowing he doesn’t want to tell Liam he was out for a smoke. Liam hates how he’s still smoking, and he’s somehow been able to keep from Liam just how dependent he’s become on them when his been in this hospital.
Harry thinks it’s funny when Zayn gets scolded by Liam though because he always makes himself as small as possible compared to the slightly younger boy, always guilty he’s lets him down. Liam’s the only one who can lecture Zayn and make him feel bad, Liam has that effect on people.
“Hey, do you have a cig on you Zayn?” He smirks and Zayn sends him he’s most lethal glare. He’s going to put hair dye in his shampoo for this.
“No,” Zayn mumbles, clearly lying and he doesn’t look Liam in the eye because he knows his looking at him all disappointed. He hates that look.
“Oh Zayn,” Liam says sadly and reaches out his hand for Zayn to take. Zayn ignores it though and wraps his own around his torso tightly.
“Have you been stress smoking? Zayn you know that’s not good for you, how many have you gone through?” Liam asks. Liam knows how Zayn is when he’s stressed, knows how he relies on a cigarette to calm him down. Knows the slippery slope of just how addicted Zayn can get. He’s been there, helped him through it. Now he’s the reason Zayn’s turned to it.
Zayn just shrugs, still not looking him in the eyes, “It’s fine Liam, I’m fine. You just focus on getting better. I can handle it,”
He can handle it, that’s the thing. He’s been smoking a long time before the boys, it’s just. He hasn’t had to handle it without Liam, since he’s had Liam. Liam’s the only person he’d want to stop smoking for, and now his gone and let him down.
“Zayn,” Liam says a bit more forcefully, he’s tired and sore but he’ll keep lecturing Zayn all day if he has to.
“More then I’d like okay, it’s just…” he cuts off a bit frantic, he doesn’t like to get upset in front of the boys, anyone really. He can handle it, he usually can handle it,
“It’s hard. Is all,” He finished lamely, still wrapping his arms around him tightly.
Liam sighs but there’s a hint of fondness in there that Zayn doesn’t miss, “I can’t imagine how hard this has been on you guys, but you have to understand I’m getting better. It’s not quickly but it’s happening, I’m not broken. I feel like none of you are getting that,” Liam jokes lightly, continuing to hold his hand out to Zayn and finally he moves his chair closer taking it and resting his head on Liam’s leg.
“I know,” Zayn mumbles childishly, “it just sucked.”
Liam smiles and starts carding his fingers through Zayn’s hair, “What would I do without you boys?” he laughs.
“You’d probably be a lot less stressed,” Niall states matter of fact.
Liam laughs, “Maybe,”
They sit there in comfortable silence for a while, Liam anchoring the four boys while he sits in his hospital bed and they sit like guard puppies around him. Nothing is conventional about their friendship, nothing really makes sense at how close they are or how they act. But Liam doesn’t care, he has the four best friends he could ever ask for.
Epilogue
Liam doesn’t remember how long he’s been out of hospital for, he knows it’s been a while, a few weeks at minimal. Times a bit harder to track when he’s not really doing anything structured, he feels like Harrys home is a bit like a time loop he’s stuck in. A good one though.
He does know however it hasn’t been long enough, not long enough for it to all seem like some scary dream yet at least.
He’s sitting on the balcony in Harry’s ridiculously embellished house, admiring the insanely pretty view, in a seriously comfortable outdoor chair which is almost the size of his bed at home. He suspects the chair is a new addition to the house when he came over though, because it’s a very big square size that can have him sitting comfortably on it even with his leg in a cast, and it’s easy to get in and out of. Plus its right outside the balcony his room is connected to, which is just a guest bedroom Harry has plenty of, and it’s the only room with added touches of home.
Liam remembers suggesting to Harry that instead of going back to his own home to recover he go back to Harrys for a little while, he wouldn’t want to intrude but it is quite big and would be able to fit the extra guests if they chose to stay.
Harry had just agreed quickly, telling Liam not to worry about it he’d sort it all out. Nobody had said anything about it again and then suddenly when it was time to go home Liam had forgotten all about it. Apparently Harry hadn’t though, because the boys had whisked him away just outside of London to Harrys humble abode that had been stocked with just about anyone who had been in a car accident could possibly ever need.
Harry had been clearly quite busy organizing everything when he was in hospital and Liam was touched he’d even gone to the trouble of decorating Liam’s room with a giant batman poster.
Of course, when Liam turned to Harry and told him it was all too much he didn’t need to go to this much trouble he’d just been shushed quickly, and Harry had told him not to mention it, seriously.
Liam assumed this was one of his ways of coping, over compensating.
That had been a few weeks ago now and tomorrow Liam’s cast was going to come off his leg, and he’d finally be able to walk without crutches. He’d finally be able to take a shower and not a bath with a plastic bag around his leg. Even though Harry’s giant bath was lovely, privacy in the shower was also lovely. He’d finally be free of the last remaining, awful reminder of his accident. It was still a bit to recovery, he hasn’t even thought about performing yet and physical therapy would have to increase as well as gym sessions to gain back all the strength he’d lost. But it was another step closer to a far brighter future, and Liam was ecstatic.
There’s a knock on the balcony door, and Liam turns to find Harry grinning sheepishly at him with a mug of tea. Liam easily motions for him to sit down, and Harry takes a seat next to him on the giant couch, cuddling up close.
“How are you?” Harry asks, its a tiresome question one with far more connotations behind it than usual. One he’s been asked more times than he can count the past few weeks. One he’s kind of gotten used to.
“I’m good Haz, you?” He generally answers the same every day, but Harry can tell when somethings really wrong. Today is not one of those days.
Harry however, sighs into Liam’s shoulder, “I’m a bit sad actually,”
Liam frowns down at him, “Why?”
“Well,” Harry flushes a bit fiddling with the strings on Liam’s hoodie, “It’s just, you’re getting your cast off tomorrow. Which, you know is great. I’m so glad you’re better and we’ll even be able to start touring soon. It’s just, you won’t really need me anymore, is all.”
Liam frowns, a bit stunned, “You don’t actually think that do you?” he asks.
Liam’s not sure there’s a planet where he won’t ever need Harry or any of the boys.
“Well no I mean not like that,” He starts awkwardly, “I know you need me, generally. It’s just, ever since the accident it felt like having you here was something I could actually do to make you feel better. The soup and chair and stuff, and now you’re better you don’t need it. You can go back to being superman for everyone else, it was just nice for it to be the other way around for a little bit.”
It’s true, that sometimes Liam takes on the big brother role a bit too enthusiastically sometimes. Even when he was in the hospital he was still worrying about all the boys. But he still needs them, he wouldn’t have survived in Wolverhampton without them these past few weeks.
Allowing him to get mad and frustrated and even throw things when he couldn’t do things for himself. They let him be moody and watch Toy Story with him when he was in pain. Pretended that he was being useful in the makeshift studio they made for him in Harrys basement even though he knew they weren’t actually doing anything productive for the next album but didn’t want to make him feel helpless. They kept his medication on track and got him to doctors’ appointments on time, there’s nobody else in the world he would have allowed himself to be so vulnerable in front of. He’s never trusted anyone else enough.
Liam smirks and brings Harry in closer, “Don’t be silly Harry I’ll always need you, I can’t thank you enough for looking after me like you have.”
Harry sighs, “Shouldn’t have to though should you, it wasn’t an option when you were hurt. We were just going to. Pretty sure Louis was going to fight you’re mom if she took you away,” He laughs.
Liam laughs too, cause he does remember that, “Thank you anyway.”
Harry smiles, “Thank you for coming back, we never could have lost you.”
Liam can hear his voice waver a bit and holds him tighter, they’re all a lot better now but Liam’s not silly to think they’re all completely over the accident, the thought of almost losing a brother. He feels awful for them because he knows he wouldn’t be over it if it was one of them. He almost has a heart attack Louis does something stupid and bumps he’s head or when Harry trips down the stairs, which why would Harry even buy a house with this many stairs is beyond Liam.
Anyway, so Liam can’t imagine if it was one of them who had been in the accident. He knows they all have flashbacks to when they thought he wasn’t going to be okay and they need reassurance. Harry will come sit with him sometimes, listening to his heartbeat to calm himself. Zayn will come into his room randomly and abrupt, and then leave suddenly like a deer caught in headlines when he see’s Liam is okay. Louis checks on him when his napping sometimes, making sure he’s still breathing. And Niall’s crawled into his bed in the middle of the night on more than one occasion he’s been here.
Liam lets them have their indulges, pretends like he doesn’t notice when in fact they’re the least subtle people on earth. But it’s been nice, even for him having them all around. Knowing there all safe.
They sit in a comfortable silence for a little while longer, enjoying the view and warm London afternoon.
It doesn’t last long before it’s interrupted by the other boys, Liam can hear them a mile away.
“You don’t get to hog Liam Harry, there are rules about this sort of thing,” He hears Louis tease and suddenly they’ve all joined them on the big couch. Louis cuddling up to Harry’s side wrapping an arm around his waist and Niall squishing himself between them.
Zayn tries and fails to keep clear or the madness for a while trying to look as indifferent and cool with his beanie and leather jacket. That is until Louis grabs his arm with his free hand and pulls him down on the couch on top of him.
“Ugh Louis,” Zayn complains but makes himself comfortable on top of Louis as payback.
That doesn’t last long however because Louis digs his nimble fingers into Zayn’s sensitive sides which has him yelping and thrashing around trying to escape.
“That’s not fair Louis!” He laughs, but he’s pouting once he escapes Louis tickling fingers and goes to sit on Liam’s other side, as far away from Louis as possible cheeks tinting pink in embarrassment. Zayn’s always hated being tickled the most but Liam thinks he needs it sometimes.
“Poor Zaynie,” Louis coo’s and Zayn just pokes his tongue out at the older boy, resting his head on Liam’s shoulder.
“Ready for that thing to come off Li?” Zayn asks, gesturing to his leg.
Liam smiles, “Couldn’t be more ready. Can’t wait to start getting ready to be back on the road again.”
Zayn smiles softly at him, and for a moment they can sit in a comfortable silence.
“Hey, do you reckon they’ll let you keep it Li? And then you can be one of those people who has an old cast in his house for decoration and whenever someone looks at it funny you can be all ‘its aesthetic’” Louis asks and it’s in a more serious tone then Liam would like considering he’s just asked Liam if he’d like to decorate his home with an used, plaster cast.
Liam can’t very much think of anything less he’d like to display in his home honestly.