Chapter Text
11:52 AM
Lumine has added Aether, Jean, Kaeya, Diluc, Mona, Albedo, Lisa, Amber, Barbara, Eula, Rosaria, Sucrose, Noelle, Venti, and Childe
Lumine has named the chat “Band Losers”
Childe: wtf Lumine
Jean: language
Childe: are you my mom
Lisa: i fucked your mom
Jean: Lisa
Lisa: jean
Albedo: this is why im on anxiety medication
Eula: everyone here is mentally ill albedo
Eula: except for my gf
Aether: this is kinda unrelated but i think anyone who would willingly date childe is more than mentally ill
Childe: shut up heather
Aether: do not bring your goddamned tater-tot eating theater kid ass into this conversation
Childe: Lumine literally added me
Aether removed Childe from the conversation.
Lumine added Childe to the conversation.
Lumine changed Aether’s name to “Child”
Childe: this may be confusing
Lumine changed Childe’s name to “Toddler”
Toddler: ok
Child: lumi why would you do this to me
Child: i thought i was your brother
Lumine changed Child’s name to “Bad Twin”
Lumine changed Lumine’s name to “Good Twin”
Bad Twin: ok
Jean: Aren’t you all supposed to be in class right now?
Bad Twin: ABORT
Toddler: EVERYONE HIDE JEAN IS COMING
Albedo: you two are the reason i have social anxiety
3:42 PM
Good Twin: ok so we got a bit distracted but the reason i made a group chat is because there’s gonna be events and shit and we need to communicate
Mona: Lumi i appreciate you <3
Lumine: thank you hun <3
Sucrose: Am I missing something?
Bad Twin: nah they’re besties
Eula: unlike me and Amber <3
Good Twin changed Eula’s name to “Amber Simp”
Amber Simp: i can accept this
4:58 PM
Kaeya has sent an image
Kaeya: what a bicon
Lisa: see this works in two ways because she is both a bisexual icon and a bisexual criminal
Kaeya: biCON
Diluc: Kaeya, I need you to shut the fuck up.
Kaeya: what is this an essay whats with the fuckin grammar and punctuation
Diluc has left the chat.
Kaeya has added Diluc to the chat.
Diluc: You aren’t gonna let me leave, are you?
Kaeya: no siree
Diluc: Damn it.
9:37 PM
Albedo: can any of you paradiddle
Bad Twin: paradiddling is hard >:(
Kaeya: you wanna know what else is hard
Bad Twin: no
Lisa: my 99-inch cock
Amber Simp: getting an erection must be a nightmare
Bad Twin: stop
Amber Simp: Lisa do you pass out every time you get hard because of all the blood rushing out of your head?
Good Twin: ima be honest i forgot cocks didn’t have bones for a sec
Bad Twin: Lumine whatthefuck
Good Twin: WELL WHY IS IT CALLED A BONER THEN
Albedo: is this about paradiddling or cocks
Toddler: yes