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Montgomery plopped down against the couch, the furniture squeaking beneath his weight and dipping low to accommodate him.
He was tired from the show and while he’d normally stay above to sign autographs and make little hearts flutter at the chance to meet their stars, he felt it an overbearing task tonight. He’d only signed a few autographs before he left, ruffling unruly hair and declaring the little tots his rockstars. His smile dropped as he descended down the lift.
His line up had been much smaller —as it usually was— and he doubted his leaving would cause much of an unrest among the fans. He was, after all, the least popular of the band members. The thought brought a twist of nerves to his abdomen.
He secluded to a rest area the band usually used for socializing. Monty’s only reason for picking here to relax being that the seating was more comfortable than in his own room. He plopped down on the couch and forced the cushions to sink low beneath his weight. His nose turned to the ceiling and he mindlessly strummed his fingers against the strings of his bass seated in his lap.
Several moments passed while he sat in silence and then the sound of the mechanical door sliding open interrupted him. No sound followed aside from the sound of it closing again and he tilted his head forward to stare down his snout at whoever had entered. Bonnie stood at the door, his back turned and left ear twitching in what Monty recognised from previous observation was annoyance. He turned his eyes back to the ceiling, avoiding the bunny as he turned around to face him.
Bonnie’s footsteps became louder to him the closer he got and he tried to pay no attention. Difficult, as Bonnie now stood in front of him. “What was that?” Bonnie’s voice was low and demanding. It made the gator shiver slightly. He’d upset him.
“Whatcha talkin about?” He asked innocently. The hitch in Bonnie’s breath made him wince inwardly and considering himself brave he turned his head down to look at him. Bonnie was standing with his arms crossed before him, his eyes burning down at him. “That. On stage. My solo.”
Monty stopped playing. His fingers hovered above the strings and he considered continuing, but his claws seized. A sigh rumbled in his throat. The rabbit’s eyes were expectant and he tapped his fingers against his biceps.
“Err. Listen, Bon. It wasn’t like I was tryin to steal your thunder or anythin. Just.. wanted some spotlight ‘s all.” Monty’s thin lipped explanation only left Bonnie with a sour look that made Monty think fondly of the one he’s received before. The bunny growled. “Yes. My spotlight. Did it occur to you that I’m the lead bassist?” He moved from Monty then, moving across the room and making Monty nervous. “You’re my backup, Monty. Not my rival.”
“Not like it hurt anyone!” The words left his mouth before he thought of them. “The kids loved it— and you still signed autographs after anyway. Don’t see the big deal—“
“Of course you don’t!” Bonnie yelled and Monty visibly shrunk back into the couch. He gripped the arm of his bass absently as he listened. Bonnie rounded on him and pointed directly at his snout. “You don’t understand how that would make me feel because you don’t care about anyone else!”
Monty shoved Bonnie’s hand away from him and placed his bass on the floor beside the couch with a gentleness he’d only used for the instrument. “Course I care!” He stood from his seated position and forced Bonnie to look up to him. The rabbit glared daggers up to him and wrinkled his nose. “Don’t try to intimidate me, Montgomery!”
Monty faltered in his bravado, surprised that Bonnie would suggest such a thing. “I-I wasn’t tryna! Not my fault you’re little!“ A comment Monty himself found slightly amusing. Bonnie was a tall bunny. He recalled thinking that when he’d first met him, but Monty still towered over him.
“And it’s not my fault the children don’t like you!” Bonnie fired back with very little hesitation. Monty deflated. That comment twisted the already aching bundle of nerves in his stomach further. Bonnie knew exactly what that comment did to him and he continued. “I didn’t make you a gator, Monty! If you were cuter like me or had softer features like Freddy then maybe you’d have more fans, but you frighten them more than you entertain them!”
Monty was still. The statement fell onto him light a weighted blanket and left his limbs heavy and reaching for the floor. His stunned silence was met with Bonnie’s unbothered stare.
“This is where you apologize.” Monty’s voice was quiet now. It wasn’t a growl, a hiss or a snarl as it usually was when they argued. He was truly taken off guard today and Bonnie knew as much. He leaned forward, rising to the tips of his toes towards Monty. “No.”
Monty inhaled sharply, his shoulders tensing and making him look larger. He clamped his mouth shut. He forced himself to stay calm although the flurry of emotions in him screamed to say something just as bitter.
“C’était cruel,” he hissed beneath his breath.
“But not untrue,” Bonnie quickly added and Monty glared at him. Bonnie sighed and his shoulders drooped. He broke eye contact with Monty to stare solemnly to the floor. “I can look past it, Monty. But, you know not everyone else can.”
“You need to accept that you’re not cuddly and loveable like the rest of us.” The words stung. They pierced into him like a blade and he choked soundlessly to the reality of it. How could he be angry at a fact? At something that Bonnie was only honest enough to tell him?
“…I know.” Monty finally responded. He reached for Bonnie then, bringing his large hands to the rabbit’s waist in an attempt to apologize, ask forgiveness and pretend this never happened, but Bonnie’s own small hands stopped him. The rabbit stepped away from Monty’s reach, another sigh leaving his lips and Monty’s empty palms hovered where they were.
“You can’t punish the rest of us for that,” Bonnie whispered, turning away and crossing his arms. “You should be grateful just to be here.”
“I’m not punishing anyone,” Monty grumbled and Bonnie whipped around. The bunny appeared furious again, eyes wide and jaw clenching. “You took over my solo! Is that not a punishment?” He snapped. Monty felt it was the right move to let Bonnie have the last word, agree and move on. It was certainly the easiest, but a part of him screamed at a feeling of injustice. He was being treated unfairly and he scoffed at that fact.
“Maybe you’re just jealous that mine was better,” he growled darkly. Bonnie’s glare dropped and he donned a look of surprise. “Say that again,” he said quietly and Monty obliged with a snarl. “Mine was better.”
“Better?” Bonnie scoffed. He moved forward, pointing to Monty’s chest as he spoke. “What’s better about you, Monty? You’re a jerk!” Bonnie’s voice was hard and loud. He stalked towards Monty and forced the larger animatronic to step backwards as he approached. “You’re arrogant and rude! You don’t know how to share, you’re a lunatic, mentally delayed—“
“How long did it take you to learn that?” Monty interrupted, yelling over him and Bonnie faltered in his steps. “Because it took me half as long and I can do multiple, no sweat!”
“—EGOTISTICAL!” Bonnie screamed over him. “Loud, obnoxious, rude! You’re an idiot! A placeholder for when I’m gone! No one cares about you but me! And this is how I’m treated!”
“Shut up!” Monty yelled. His breath quickened and he could feel the bundle of circuits they’d affectionately referred to as their hearts clenching painfully with every word spat. Bonnie didn’t relent. His ears stood high and he snorted.
“Shut up? Shut up?” He roared. He continued forward and slammed two hands on Monty’s chest, shoving him back. “Is it too much for you, Monty?” He shoved Monty again. Bonnie’s open palms closed to fists and Monty’s breath hitched. “Can’t handle it? Don’t tell me I’m hurting your feelings!” He beat his fists against Monty’s chest. “Maybe you should leave then!” He smacked Monty’s chest. “The band doesn’t want you!”
Monty caught Bonnie’s fists in his hands and wrestled with them to stop. “Let go of me!” Bonnie screamed. “Let go of me, you asshole! They don’t love you, Monty!” He broke one skinny wrist free from Monty’s hand. “They hate you!” He pushed hard against Monty’s chest, trying to pull himself away and resorting to hitting him against his collar. “I hate you!” Bonnie’s fist clashed with Monty’s jaw.
Unprepared, Monty’s breath was taken away by the hit. Pain surged through his teeth just above where he’d been struck and his body shivered with cold adrenaline. He turned back, catching Bonnie’s hands before they could fall to him again and hoisted them above his head. Something popped somewhere inside of one of Bonnie’s shoulder joints, but this didn’t register in Monty’s mind as he threw Bonnie away. The rabbit slammed back onto the ground and began wailing. The sound made Monty pale with realization and he took a step forward while Bonnie sobbed and held onto one limp arm with his opposite hand.
“Bonnie—“ Monty began to say, cut short by a gasp in the doorway. Chica stood in the threshold only for a moment before she launched towards the pair and knelt down on the floor beside Bonnie. He raised his head from the floor and rested it in her lap while she inspected his shoulder. Monty had yanked it loose from the socket and now it laid still against the floor.
The gator was stuck frozen until Chica’s eyes raised to him. “How could you?” She yelled, sounding frazzled and upset. A sob was on the tip of her beak while she yelled at him and Monty felt scared to hear it. “Get away from us! Get away!” She squealed. Monty did only as she’d said and backed away quickly. The thick, overwhelming guilt that fell over him weighed every movement and made his legs weak to run. He found that strength however, forcing himself to leave the room in a hurry. He bolted for the door, twisting before he was completely outside and slamming his tail roughly against the threshold as he left. The tail stayed shaking and swaying side to side anxiously as he ran. He was safe when he was inside his room, the mechanical door sliding closed behind him and leaving him in darkness. He pulled the sunglasses from his eyes and stared wide eyed with his hands against the metal. He was shaking. His breath ragged and his stomach twisting in knots. How could he? What had he done?
“Bonnie..” he whispered. He wasn’t meant to hurt him. Bonnie pushed him. Bonnie talked down to him. He was right, he thought. Everything Bonnie had said. He was right.. and Monty had just proved it.
________________________________________
A persistent, heavy knocking echoed from the other side of Monty’s door. Someone had come to visit him and while Monty assumed his band members had taken Bonnie to the mechanic’s ward he had made good work of taking out his anger on the room he resided. He laid atop purple carpet, pushing aside the loose stuffing of a destroyed plush figure with his claws when his attention raised to the door. He didn’t make a sound. Perhaps they’d leave if he didn’t reply and search for him elsewhere.
“Monty?” The gator’s expression soured at the sound of the voice. He knew exactly why Freddy had come. Screw caution, he thought. If he had come for a fight he’ll get one!
Monty crawled back to his feet and made his way to the door. Tapping the pad beside the door, he slid it open and stood with his hands on either side of the threshold. “What do you want?” He hissed.
Freddy stood before him, his tall, statuesque figure blocking the light from outside. His posture was straight, strong and graceful as always and he was the only animatronic to have the privilege of looking down at Monty. A fact of which the alligator despised.
“May I come in?” Freddy asked. There was no anger in his voice. Only the gentle crackle of concern that Monty had become used to hearing when being addressed by him. The gator rolled his eyes, but moved aside to allow the bear entry. “Knock yourself out,” he muttered. Freddy was slow as he walked inside. His eyes, as well as the others, were not accustomed to the dark and adjusted over a period of seconds. Another factor that made Monty so different from the rest of them and made him dependent on his sunglasses to not burn his sensitive eyes in the stage light.
“Monty..,” Freddy whispered as his eyes wandered. His eyes had cleared now and he was able to see what Monty had done to his once clean room. His belongings were a tarnished mess. His couch littered with claw marks and hanging mirrors pulled to the floor and smashed. Posters ripped down, stuffed alligators in pieces and anything with his own name on it either broken or torn apart. There was one corner of his room that was unscathed. A very small section dedicated to fan gifts that Monty couldn’t bear to destroy, seeing them as not belonging to himself, but the children who loved him. Foolish, idiot children that had yet to learn.
“Elected you, huh?” Monty said, drawing Freddy’s attention back to himself. He walked over broken shards and to his tattered couch. He fell against it, staring in boredom at his own claws as he spoke. They’d need sharpening or possibly replacing now. They were never meant to be used for breaking furniture. “Can’t say I’m surprised. Didn’t imagine any of the rest of them coming here.”
Freddy didn’t speak. He walked towards Monty and the gator craned his neck back to look up at him, glaring up at the bear with disdain. Freddy stepped out of his way and lowered slowly to sit beside Monty on the couch. His decision to sit beside him and not stand above him was not unnoticed, but Monty felt no need to dwell on the thought. Freddy was always non confrontational after all.
“I’m not here to scold you, Monty,” he said. Monty raised a curious brow. Freddy was a terrible liar. Perhaps he was skilled enough to fool the other band mates, but Monty knew exactly where he fit in and no amount of lies from the bear’s mouth would change that.
“S’pose this means I’m out of the band,” Monty muttered as he looked away. He didn’t move his head as he glanced around his room. At the mess he’d made. At everything that reminded him of himself.
“I did not allude to that and if I did I am sorry,” Freddy said. “I simply wish to know what happened.” Monty clenched his jaw and sourly forced a toothy grin.
“Didn’t anyone fill you in?” He asked and Freddy nodded in his peripheral vision, verbally agreeing a moment later. “That’s what happened. I hurt Bonnie.”
“Why?” For whatever reason the question stung. Monty had asked himself that too. Far too many times to count. “We were fightin and it happened,” he explained shortly. There was disgust in his voice. The memory was still fresh in his mind. How he’d behaved. How he’d hurt him. Bonnie’s teary, hurt eyes as he laid on the ground. Monty pinched the bridge of his snout, a warning to his eyes to stay dry. “Is he okay?”
“Bonnie will be fine once he is tended to.” Monty closed his eyes as he listened. “His joints are weaker than yours. His body is not as strong as ours being predators. This was known to you.”
“I didn’t wanna hurt him!” Monty shouted abruptly. He turned to face Freddy. “I never woulda touched him like that. Not ever! I just wanted him to stop—“ Monty clamped his jaw shut before the words could escape. He looked away again, turning his eyes to the floor and focusing on the rumbling inside his head. He would not break down. Not in front of Freddy. ANYONE but Freddy.
It was quiet for a while. Monty tried to calm himself down, to think of something else, to imagine he was elsewhere. “What happened, Monty?” Freddy’s voice broke that silence and Monty choked a pitiful laugh. There was no humor to it. Only pain and he was sure Freddy heard it.
Monty thought to shout at him and demand he leave his room. To just order his immediate dismissal and be on with it. He would not be missed and he expected as much. But, the thought broke him. Would they hate him and only remember him disdainfully as a character haphazardly thrown in to change their dynamic and ruin their performance? Tears flooded Monty’s eyes. He hunched his spine and dropped his face into his hands.
“I fucked up, Freddy,” he sobbed. “I fucked up real bad —and now everythin y’all think is true.” Monty felt the warmth of Freddy’s strong hands against his cool forearm and he shoved it away quickly. “Don’t touch me! Ne pas!” Monty pulled at his fiery hair.
“Je ne vaux rien! Je n'ai pas le droit!”
“Montgomery gator, look at me,” Freddy’s voice was harder than Monty had ever heard it. He raised his head from beneath his fists and turned to Freddy, staring through a blurry sheen of tears. Freddy’s eyes weren’t as angry. They weren’t staring at him with anger or disgust. He looked mournful; shocked, but full of sorrow, perhaps even regret. “Please.That is enough.”
Monty blinked sadly at him, a large tear escaping his eye and rolling down his cheek. Quickly he wiped the fluid away as if Freddy would take no notice of it. “Fuckin embarrassin, huh?” He chuckled dryly. Freddy shook his head.
“You have nothing to be ashamed of,” the bear said and it made Monty briefly stop his sniffling. “I know this was not out of malice. I know how Bonnie can be.” Monty wiped another tear away, completely drying his face. He inhaled deeply, filling his chest with air in a desperate attempt to calm himself down. “You do?”
Freddy nodded. “I was once with Bonnie too.” Monty allowed for himself to relax again, slumping his shoulders down and staring at his hands dangling between his knees. “Forgot you two were a thing. Smack you ‘round too, huh?” Monty had only heard from Bonnie briefly that he and Freddy used to date. It was a time before Monty. Before he was even a concept. It was another thing which made him feel out of place. Not because they had been together, but because they’d known each other so long. All of them had and Monty was new, incompetent and incompatible. The silence became obvious to Monty then when he realized he’d had time to think without Freddy’s voice interrupting him and he glanced back at the bear.
Freddy was staring at him, bewildered and shocked. The stare put weight on Monty's shoulders and he felt as if he was being crushed beneath those eyes. “Bonnie.. was never physically violent with me,” Freddy said finally and another silence followed. He blinked the surprise away and his eyes filled with concern. “Does he hurt you, Monty?”
Was Freddy’s concern for him? For his well-being? He didn’t expect this. Did Freddy.. care? He shook his head with a snort. “I’m a fuckin gator, Freddy,” he muttered. “It ain’t gonna hurt me—“
“That makes no difference to me,” Freddy interrupted him. Monty looked back into Freddy’s eyes, but there was something different about them. Has he ever really looked? Has he ever perceived them like this before? They were calm and comforting. They had a softness Monty hadn’t seen before. Has.. anyone ever looked at him like that before?
“Monty, I am sorry. I didn’t know.” Freddy inched closer. His thigh was almost touching Monty’s and feeling his warmth, Monty retreated further to the opposite side of the couch. “How long—“
“Fuck off, Freddy!” Monty jumped to his feet. He turned around and glared down at Freddy. “Don’t act like you care. I’m fuckin tired of y’all acting like I mean anythin to you!” Monty shouted, but his voice broke halfway through. It was true. Deep down Monty knew it was all fake. The concern. The curt smile when he entered the room. The pat on the back at the end of each show. Freddy only did what was required of him as the leader: to make them feel needed. But, there was no part of Monty that needed to be here. Freddy’s only objective then, was to make sure Monty never found out.. and he’d failed.
Freddy was silent for a long time as if he was collecting his words. He gave a mechanical exhale and let his joints go loose. “This is not your fault.”
The weight in Monty’s chest vanished and left behind was a feeling of emptiness. He.. had never heard that before.
“Was Bonnie hurting you— is that why you injured him?” Monty clamped his jaw closed and Freddy’s brows raised. The answer was clear to the bear, but he said nothing. He wanted a verbal response. Monty shook his head and snarled. “What difference does it make now? I still hurt him. I hurt him bad. I.. What the fuck is wrong with me?” Monty’s voice fell apart. His cold skin crawled and he felt something close to gooseflesh prick at his leathery skin. His eyes burned and felt heavy and sunken into his skull. His throat tight and choked, he gasped horribly. He fell into a series of sobs, all incomplete by another, larger hiccup and gasp. He was in pieces, sobbing, barely able to breathe in front of a bear he’d always felt a great need to surpass.
Freddy stood wordlessly and was before Monty in a heartbeat. The gator expected a scoff, a barrage of comments to man up and stop being so pathetic. Perhaps even a hit. A quick slap to force him into silence. Monty braced himself for this, his body reacting the same way it did when he was hit regularly and not to fight back as he felt was natural to him. Bonnie had changed that about him.
No, Freddy did not strike him and Monty stood, uncertain of what had happened as he felt Freddy lean into him. But, there was no pain, no words, just warmth. Freddy was embracing him. Monty didn’t move. His body was frozen between Freddy’s arms and when he felt the bear squeeze him it made his heart flutter. He didn’t recall the last time he’d been held. He never thought of himself as touch starved. He was an alligator after all. He’d go most of his life without being touched, but in this moment —a moment he felt truly pathetic, he needed it.
Monty’s legs became jelly beneath him and he leaned against Freddy. He did not reciprocate the affection, but he desperately wanted it. When Freddy ushered him back to the couch Monty followed. He sat back down with him and Freddy’s arms left his body cold and unloved as it always was.
“Breathe,” Freddy said. “Breathe with me.” Freddy took one deep breath in, his chest visibly raising, and he held it while he waited for Monty to do the same. The gator inhaled deeply, releasing when Freddy did so. He focused on their breath. He focused on Freddy’s chest and how it raised and fell. It distracted him and soon he was breathing naturally again.
“Why are you helpin me, Freddy? I ain’t.. I ain’t worth this,” Monty whimpered. Freddy rumbled in his chest before he spoke. “You are worth it, Monty —and you are my friend. I care very deeply for you.”
“You ain’t my friend. You’re his. I know I’m not long for this. I’ll be kissin the curb before the week is out.”
“That will not happen.”
“I hurt a band member. I hurt him,” Monty’s eyes began to well with tears again. He inwardly thought it ridiculous how much fluid his eyes could hold and how desperate his tears seemed to be to escape. “The person I said I’d never hurt. He’s in pain because of me.”
“You were defending yourself,” Freddy said sternly. Monty felt his hand rest atop his shoulder. Freddy’s hands, as his chest had been, were warm. They were comforting and made Monty feel less alone in this cold, dark room. “He was hurting you.”
“That’s different! It doesn’t hurt me! I hurt him!” Monty bellowed. Freddy took his hand away from Monty’s shoulder. Monty’s sad, tearful eyes raised to him and he waited again for a hateful word. Freddy’s eyes were angry. They were hard and staring into Monty in a way he’d never seen from the bear.
“Look at me right now and tell me it doesn’t hurt.” Freddy’s words cut into him, but not in the way he’d expected. Freddy was right. This was agony. Months Monty had spent listening to Bonnie’s hateful words. He felt the coldness of Bonnie’s rejection of his affection. His kisses were only returned in the presence of others and dismissed in private. Bonnie’s fists had left bruises that would never heal. His thick skin could protect him from that pain, but the internal agony of knowing Bonnie wanted to hurt him —it was what made Monty fall apart now. Bonnie hadn’t loved him for a long time. Bonnie didn’t love him.
“You have been very brave, Monty. You have been alone for so long.. but, you don’t have to be. Not anymore,” Freddy said as he extended a hand. Monty stared down at the gift of Freddy’s kindness. Freddy was offering him something he hadn’t considered. To be cared for by him. Monty only recalled Bonnie’s kindness, his gentle hands between his own, larger fingers —but, even then that was false. What Freddy offered him... was not genuine. This was a lie!
“Don’t,” Monty growled. Freddy’s ears raised in surprise and he moved his hand closer. Monty ignored the offer. “Monty—“
“Don’t you fuckin dare, Fazbear!” Monty roared. He leaned away from Freddy, his eyes burning with anger at the bear that was offering him false kindness. “You don’t care. You don’t give a shit!”
“Monty, that is not—“
“I said shut the fuck up!” Monty shook his head and hissed dangerously. “You won’t trick me. You won’t make me look like an idiot!” Monty’s breathing began to quicken again and his chest was clenching painfully as it had before. “Don’t fuckin sit there and act like I mean fuckin anythin to you— to any of you! Don’t think I don’t see how y’all look at me. Don’t think I haven’t noticed how y’all don’t look at me!” Monty’s eyes were wild, his chest heaving as he breathed and sounding hoarse in his throat. “I don’t mean fuckin anythin to you! I ain’t a project for you to poke and play with! —and I sure as shit ain’t your friend! You really want me to think you care? That I’m not some weak, pathetic, stupid fuckin gator that has no fuckin place with any of you on that stag—“ Monty had been yelling, preparing his next self deprecative statement about his fragile ego when Freddy interrupted him. The bear’s hands had raised to Monty’s cheeks and pulled him forward, their lips meeting for a quick kiss.
Monty felt his heart murmur in his chest and for a moment he felt as if he had fainted, but this was real.. and it was wonderful. Freddy parted from him only for a moment before Monty chased his lips and reignited it, harder and more desperate than before. His hands wrapped around Freddy’s throat and he held him there, asking wordlessly for this to continue. He was desperate for this feeling. This feeling of love that he had lost so long ago when Bonnie had one day stopped caring for him. He tasted it on Freddy’s lips and he wanted it. To feel again. To feel something that wasn’t pain.
Freddy broke the kiss, pulling away in shock and surprise. Monty followed him mindlessly and Freddy’s hands stopped him. “I am so very sorry,” the bear said. Reality crashed into Monty then and he felt sheepish at the ordeal. He leaned away, Freddy’s hands still lingering around his neck like a necklace. “It’s.. it’s fine. I..” Monty fell silent. Freddy’s hands dropped from his neck and internally Monty asked for them to return to him. But, not now. Not while he was so confused. Did Freddy have feelings for him? Was it just to shut him up? Or was it another trick? For some reason, now Monty felt the latter was not plausible. The questions that buzzed in his mind overshadowed the agony he felt from Bonnie’s influence.
There was silence between them. Monty could feel the embarrassment and shame radiate from Freddy. The bear was silent in his thoughts. Perhaps he was asking himself why he had acted in such a way.
“I’m leavin Bonnie,” Monty said quietly. There was a determination in his voice. He felt a strength deep inside his chest he hadn’t realized he’d forgotten. When had he allowed himself to become so pathetic? He was strong. He was above shedding tears for someone that lied to him. “I think that would be best,” Freddy responded. He felt Freddy’s hand return to his shoulder, a welcoming weight as he suffered his internal turmoil. “You will not be alone. I will be with you every step of the way.”
Monty cracked a smile. His face felt light after so much crying and the happiness, even if only slight, made him feel less pathetic. He wasn't alone this time. “Thanks, Freddy.” He looked up to Freddy. The bear’s eyes were sincere, telling him silently that everything would be okay and he looked deeper. It was the first time he had truly seen Freddy. He’d seen true kindness. “You’re a good friend.”