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FEH won’t talk about Bruno, no, no, no.
IS are cowards with Bruno.
(Case in point…)
It was the Voting Day (Choose Your Own Legend day)
Everyone is ready
With their beloved heroes in mind
(or their vote-bots standing by)
Brave alts in mind,
Propaganda designed,
Vote Chrom .
But that’s a tale for another day.
(Sorry for the derail, anyways…)
Three days later, results came.
(Hurry and tell us!)
Eliwood and Alm won their braves.
(So where does that leave us?)
Excluding OGs in the game…
(Chrobin was cute, but anyways…)
Bruno’s best boy in Brave Redux (oh hoh!)
Brave Redux would give Bruno!
…Right?
Meanwhile in the background all the interns are scrambling,
All their early guesses of results, unraveling.
Their plan of a redux quickly derailed out of plan (tick, tick, tick…)
Months had passed since then and time was quickly ticking.
Summoners caught on to the rules of last handpickings.
When will you drop Anna, Louise, or the jelly man?
Speaking of Gel Man…
Glows to strike fear, face to buttcrack.
The angst behind them are tons to unpack.
The cohorts push plot and strike back to back.
But.
Meanwhile where the hell’s Bruno? (Bruh, who knows.)
Intsys, what about Bruno?
Will we get any news today, he'll help fight Askr’s undead? (lol, nope.)
Then maybe when the plot moves on, will he fight Embla’s instead? (lol, no.)
At this point he’s a no-show here. Do we know he ain’t dead? (Oh no…)
It’s been a year and you’re filling us with dread!
Then Spring came
and to earn back our trust,
IS gave us this bunny-alt man.
He’d combust
from his abs to his bust,
packing several shades of hot damn .
(Kozaki’s having a field day.)
He told Alfonse he’d help when he can,
But for now he must go.
He’s needed elsewhere.
It’s like Intsys just said,
“FINE, HERE.
Never ask us about him again.”
(But quick question…)
“So, Bruno…”
“Yeah, about OG Bruno…”
“I really think you should launch OG Bruno.”
“Intsys, will you ever give us OG Bruno?!”
“Hey everyone, next vote’s here!”
Time for voting!
It was just voting day, (It was just voting day)
We were getting ready,
But then you are a horrible bot (turns out the bot measures sucked)
Plotting a scheme
to vote-spam for the meme.
Vote Jorge.
It’s kinda fun all while it lasts.
(So many people that man passed…)
Vote Gatekeeper for the memes.
(Really makes heads turn.)
He’s Best Boy and should reign supreme.
(Or just to watch the world burn.)
Someday we’ll have an All-Meme Team, but…
-
This entire round has been incredibly nerve-racking.
Everybody’s yelling and there’s tons of talk-smacking,
Tensions are so high that it makes old gauntlets look tame. (tsk, tsk, tsk…)
It felt like just yesterday some internet tough guy
Wrote a massive essay chained reply to reply,
How his hero must win or he’ll keel over and die.
Bruh… It’s just a game..!
-
New quests out now.
Orbs, back to back
Gonna grow my haul,
Quests claimed just like that.
Save up for some merges
And summon in a stack…
-
It’s ok,
I won’t beg, I won’t plead
No matter how much Intsys stalls.
So long he
were to drag on his feet,
His OG might be broken as balls.
(Or so I certainly could dream…)
Then maybe
He’ll be strong as can be
And then there’s all the alts,
Resplendent or ascended…
-
Fire Emblem
Your meme-lords shall shine.
Oops, all Three Houses.
Salt that runs for miles.
He’s here!
Book 6 just showed Bruno!
(Xander just showed up with Bruno!)
There’s some hope for more Bruno!
(But what about Ascended Bruno?)