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Diane Sanchez is a strong woman.
She knows that, everyone knows that. If she wasn't such a strong woman then she wouldn't have been able to bag a husband like Rick Sanchez, the smartest man in the universe.
Rick Sanchez, for the few people and aliens who does not know him, is a crazy man (to dumb it down).
Diane is probably the only one strong enough to handle a Rick Sanchez and she knows that. She took pride in it. She took pride that she can hold her own in every screaming match, every blaming game, every argument. Not once begging for anything.
Their first meeting turned into a hook-up, hook-up turned into more hook-ups, that finally led to pregnancy and as much of a bastard as Rick is, he thought that a kid might probably bring his feet back down to earth.
Spoiler alert: It did not.
He was still up and about, going off in space. She would be off her ass trying, and failing, to contact him. Anything to make him come home.
As a form of truce, they both decided to take care of Beth on earth and leave space expeditions on hold until then. It did not make Rick happy.
It wasn't always that simple though. On the contrary, It was never simple, especially with someone as complex as Rick Sanchez.
So as the crib walks in the front door, so did the alcohol. It was not the start of their arguments- heaven knows it started long before, but it did start the violence. The frightening violence.
Plates flew, glasses shatters, and on one bizzare episode- somehow a whole toilet seat was flung. There was never peace at the Sanchez household and more often that not, one of them walkes out with Beth in their arms to sleep in some shitty hotel for the night.
Most often than not, it would be Diane. With the few odd days Rick would be the one walking out.
And of course, right when Beth was old enough to add and subtract numbers, he was off to the stars. He wasn't always absent though. Always there for Beth's birthdays and Christmas. But never for Diane's.
So yes, Diane is a very strong woman.
Somewhere along those odd years, in the midst of the shouting matches and police visits and a large amount of emotional baggage, Diane knows she fell in love. And she knows he probably did too.
You see, he looks at her with this- just this wonder in his eyes. Whenever she can throw another argument as strong as his, he would smile this knowing smile and everything just melts. He looks at her with, dare she say, love in his eyes. Admiration, passion, focus.
She thought that maybe in their sick twisted way they found comfort in each other. Perhaps she had grown to love the screaming voice of the other, or the way heated night ends with both of them crying and in pain. She doesn't exactly want to know why, only that she does love him. And he probably did too.
Because she'd be damned if he doesn't love her back.
But being a strong woman doesn't exactly mean she is a strong mother.
She doesn't exactly feel the strength as she hurried around the house, grabbing her keys and purse, to get to the hospital as soon as possible. After all, her grandson's arriving today.
"Oh for fuBLUEGHusck's sake, the kid isn't going- going anywhere, would you-can you calm the fuck down"
Diane rolls her eyes as she steps out the house, beckoning her husband to follow, "She's your daughter, Rick. The least you could do is show your support. I'm just worried there would be complications" she sighs while locking the front door.
"Jerry is the complication" Rick grumbles under his breath, climbing into the car.
It was one of those odd days that Rick is coincidentally on Earth as something big is about to happen. He arrived just a minute before Beth called, claiming he needed to lay low for a while with the Federation on his ass again.
Diane briefly wondered what it felt like to be with Rick among the stars. Having fun together, exploring together. Just being together. Diane wondered next when the light would turn green.
The drive to the hospital was quiet. Everything is recently. Since Summer- her first grandchild, was born almost everything stopped.
Their fighting stopped so miraculously its like they've never even fought each other in their lives. Diane even tried starting one just to see if she could get a raise out of Rick.
She didn't. Her remarks was answered with a snort or an eye roll.
If she thought her world was so loud before then now, she definitely believe it is far too quiet. Too lonesome.
At first she associated it with Summer being born but she had laughed it off. If Rick can be an asshole to his daughter when she was growing up then he wouldn't care being an asshole to his granddaughter too, right?
Apparently, wrong.
Whenever he would be around Summer, he would be another man. The one Diane has wished she had seen more. Gentle and almost loving. But even with the girl's cute laughs and small smiles, it still wasn't enough to bring him down to earth just as Diane expected.
So alas, his space travels continues and continues and continues that it would be a miracle to catch him in earth. Only ever present now on Summer's birthday and Chritmas to give the girl a handful of gifts and running off again to go off to his next adventure.
Diane has known Rick Sanchez for a long long time and she had grown to accept his fleeting presence and boisterous personality. The change of said presence being more distance and said personality going quiet has been a strange change.
Soon enough, they were in the front desk asking for Beth Smith's room. The receptionist was kind and Diane couldn't help but chat with her for a bit (Diane thought that it perhaps came with her old age) which earned her a groan from her husband. She rolled her eyes and waved the young lady her thanks.
They reached the room with a sigh from both of them, Diane in relief and Rick in annoyance.
"Dad, mom, so glad you two can make it," Beth greeted them from her bed, already aware Rick has arrived on time. Diane took in the state of her daughter. Tired eyes, wiry hair. Her daughter looks far from the little girl she used to carry in her arms on scary thundering nights.
"Here he is," Jerry announced, carrying a swaddle of baby in his arms. Diane smiled softly before kissing the top of Beth's hair, whispering a quiet "good job" and petting her daughter's hair lovingly.
"Oh look, mom. Dad's holding Morty"
"Morty?" Rick asked, holding the baby in his arms, eyes never leaving the child. Diane raised an eyebrow. He didn't hold Summer when she was born, stating that he simply doesn't want to.
"Yes, like Mortimer. The dead sea? Jerry thought it would be interesting to name him something unique," Beth rolled her eyes, "Couldn't really complain when I was passed out when he signed the name"
The couple began to slowly argue but Rick has never once lifted his eyes from his grandson. Blue icy eyes has gone soft and lips parting as if he was trying to breathe. As if it had been a chore.
Diane couldn't remove her eyes from the scene, her stomach dropping to her feet, dread crawling on her back.
The argument was loud enough now to wake the newborn. Morty has all but hiccuped when Rick gently shushed him, rocking him back and forth, humming a low lullaby.
Diane racked her brain to find a memory of him ever doing that to Beth. She found nothing.
Morty's eyes slowly opened and through blurry eyes he stared at Rick. Round doe eyes full of innocence and tears. The two stared at each other, marvelling in the other's presence.
Rick felt as though he couldn't breathe with happiness.
Diane couldn't breathe with fear.
Slowly, Rick placed his lips on Morty's head into a small kiss. Gentle and caring, unlike any kiss he's ever done before. A small hush followed and he was pulling away smiling a rare special smile at Morty. Morty followed with his first smile.
"Oh my God, Morty's first smile" Beth gasped upon noticing the two. Jerry quickly took a photo of the two but neither seemed to notice anyone else in the room.
The two seems entrance and content in each other enough that Beth has to call her dad repeatedly to gain his attention and when she finally did, he looked at her in annoyance. Like doing anything else besides gaze into his grandson's eyes is a waste of time.
Diane watched the way his eyes trail back to Morty. From the cold stare to a soft one. His irises expand and a goofy smile found its way on his lips. The look of [ ] on his eyes.
Diane's fears were confirmed and she concealed a sob forming on her throat. Diane is a strong woman. But is she strong enough for this. Is she strong enough for such blasphemy? She questioned herself.
She found, she had no answers right now
Since Morty was born, she had not seen Rick left for space. It was either he was in his lab, doing some project or other, or he was in the Smith's household down the street, spending time with his grandson.
Diane is strong but she isn't strong enough to confront him of his actions. Everytime she would try to he would level her with a bored stare and her words would be caught in her throat. A "nevermind" would be thrown out and she'd be back to minding her own business.
She wondered to herself, when was the last time Rick had looked at her, really looked at her. Maybe like the way he looks at Morty.
The days turn into weeks, weeks into months, and it was finally Morty's first birthday. Rick is estatic. Buying gifts here and there, preparing for his grandson's birthday. He has not left earth even once for the entire year. A feat she's been dying to accomplish since she'd met the man.
Beth is happy of course, so glad that her father is so happy to be a part of her life, of Morty's. Sometimes though, she would look at her mom and see the same dreadful expression she wears whenever her dad holds her son. Something deep and ugly. Something painful. Something in her gut tells her something is wrong but she pushed it anyway to finally have her dad.
It still made her wonder if the same expression can be seen on her face. Jealousy, she begrudgingly thought.
Diane is aware or her daughter's misplaced feelings toward the boy. She, for one, do not know what to do. Diane is smart, but not smart enough. After all, what can you do when you have all the facts laid out before you but a single feeling withheld you from speaking out.
Her thoughts race and race but not one could help her in deciding what to do next. She doesn't even know if her assumptions are correct, she chastised, what if this was all just in her head- missing the warmth of her husband.
Hilarious, Diane thinks. Could she even believe that Rick is falling in love with Morty? Their own grandson? Flesh and blood. No, she couldn't believe it, wouldn't believe it. Her accusations are false.
But a whole year in earth and the less and less alcohol bottles in their recycle says otherwise. Her assumptions are correct.
Diane thinks, maybe she isn't as strong as she thought.
A year changed into two, and then three, and then four, and Morty is preparing to go to preschool. Rick has not left earth since.
Diane doesn't know if she should praise her grandson for keeping Rick's feet in earth or loath him because he does the one thing she promised herself she'd do.
She grew distant of her grandson as Rick grew even closer to him. They bought the house next to the Smith's much to her disapproval. Everyday was a cycle of waking up to see her husband gone and already with Morty and going to bed before Rick because he's still with Morty.
Try as she might, she still couldn't confront him. Her love for him has faded but that does not mean it proves to help her decision making. She still couldn't do it.
But do what, exactly? She asks herself
One night, as she was leaving Summer's bedroom after tucking her in as they were babysitting their grandkids, she heard a soft murmur from Morty's bedroom.
She knows she shouldn't, she knows she wouldn't like what she hears. But she still crept by the walls and stood behind the ajar door, listening to the quiet conversation.
"Papaw, I love you"
"I know, my little angel. I love you more"
"More than you love gramma?"
"More than I love anyone else"
Years went on and it was years spent on both joy and despair. Rick Sanchez has not left earth for 14 years. Diane Sanchez has not known peace for all of those years.
Diane wishes she is still a strong woman as she listen to Rick ask Beth for permission to bring Morty to the stars for his 14th birthday. Beth couldn't say no, Diane couldn't call his bluff.
She watches as they ride the newly built ship, this time with two seats to accommodate Morty.
Rick never brought me to space
Dad never brought me with him
They waved goodbye as the ship sped up, up, up, and finally they couldn't see it. Beth went in the house, announcing she would be relaxing. Diane knew it was her cue of getting black out drunk. She thought that maybe she'll join her daughter tonight.
The thought paused in her mind as she saw Summer staring at the stars, right where the duo has left. Diane's heart broke, thinking that summer felt just like her, just like Beth. Left alone and forgotten. All in favor of Morty.
She was about to go back in again when Summer's words made her freeze in her tracks.
"You know too, huh, " Summer sighs without looking at her
A beat. A minute. Diane couldn't tell if she was talking about it or not.
"Of what dear?"
"That grandpa Rick and Morty are in love," This time, she looks at her with a pained smile.
The guilt and pain crashed down Diane all at once and she thought maybe she'd have a heart attack. Maybe that will be better. She waited for the attack to come but it never did, only that her breathing has gone erratic.
"Don't say such silly things, dear girl. Let's get you back in," she forced a chuckled and wrapped an arm around Summer's shoulders.
"I was gonna tell mom too, but I don't think its bad for them, you know. I think they're really happy but I don't know. it's all weird," And she left to go inside.
Diane doesn't feel like she's a strong woman as she wept into the night, opting instead to head to their house, next to the Smith's, and opening a bottle of wine on her own. She doesn't feel very strong as well when she woke up in their couch the next day, with the framed picture of Rick holding a newborn Morty dangles on top of her mantle piece.
Diane knew that something was wrong the moment they stepped off the ship. But maybe everything seems wrong this days. Actually, everything is very wrong ever since Morty was born.
She wasn't blind to the lingering touches too. Well, more lingering than they used to. Morty's shy blush, Morty's dazed look, Morty's slow walk, Morty's Morty's Morty's-
Diane bursts into Rick's office, tears in her eyes and determination on her face. The man barely lifts an eye to her, opting on finishing the new version of Morty's phone he promised to give him.
"Are you molesting my grandson?"
She said it like a statement but she still waits for an answer. Diane doesn't know how she'll take the "yes", or even how she'll take the "no". She only knows that Rick looks so happy. Happier than she had ever seen him. And maybe all her love for him hasn't completely disappeared.
"I think we both know, that you know the answer to that. "
It was not a clear answer. It should have been but her mind is not as clear as it used to. He did not stutter and he did not burp like he used to 13 years ago. He changed. How she wished she was the reason.
She stood still for a minute, waiting for an explanation, an apology, a clarity. None comes and she retreated back to her bedroom, taking a bottle of wine on the way.
She could not decide if Rick truly molests Morty or if they really did just fell in love. Diane could not decide which she preferred.
The months following that was filled with adventures and space explorations. As the two were filled with glee and excitement in each travel, both Diane and Beth were filled with dread and jealousy.
Diane thought it was an ugly look on her daughter but then snorted as she saw a reflection of her own face. Jealousy is such an ugly emotion, she thought.
Diane thought she was a strong woman
Diane thought she was a strong woman until she found them tangled in her bed. In her house. Where she sleeps with her husband. She threw up.
Morty cried and begged her not to tell anyone, Rick only glared while putting his clothes back on. Unbeknownst to her, she was crying as well, holding on to her grandson's small face.
Her grandson was still a child, barely a teen. He still has his baby fat, still looks at toys sometimes, still enjoys cartoons. And yet, she wants to take out a knife and stab him mercilessly. She let go of her face and was gone to the closet.
Diane Sanchez is not a strong woman. Rick Sanchez knows that.
After the events she walked into, she packed her things and announced an impromptu getaway with her friends to her family as they ate dinner that night. Rick grunts half heartedly and Morty wouldn't look her in the eye.
Beth and Jerry were shocked but still supported her. Summer seemed like she didn't care. She left that very same night as she hears Rick announce he needs Morty's help in his house in some project or other.
Summer stopped her at the door, "I'm sorry Grandma, I wish I could side with you but what Rick and Morty has..." she gave Diane a pained look, (Rick and I never had it, Diane thought)
"Take care grandma" Summer squeezed her goodbye
Morty then stopped her by the bus stop, huffing and pufding from running to catch up. He stood before her, all sweaty and flushed and Diane hates how she knows its what Rick sees in him. "Grandma, I'm sorry-"
"I know, Morty. I still don't know if I'm going to tell your mother or not" Diane cut off, still not believing herself for her choices. Morty stares at her
"Oh, I was going to say sorry that Rick loves me more than he ever loved you" Morty smiled
Diane stared wide eyes even as Morty hugs her. She couldn't think as she sat on the bus with Morty waving her goodbye. Couldn't think as the views blurs and the bus takes her away.
Then finally, she could. Diane is a strong woman, she called Beth.
"You won't be telling Beth" of course it was Rick who answered. "You'll be leaving, visiting occasionally, filing a divorce because you found someone better, and you'll never be talking about any of this again not to Beth, not to fucking Jerry, and not to anyone else."
"Fuck you I'm calling the police" Diane wanted to say, but Rick is always right:
Diane Sanchez is not a strong woman.
"Okay," and he hangs up.